Animation Geek that’s true but it still comes down to the same idea that you’re not going to be fully present in the moment. You’re really thinking about the future if you want to record and look back on it instead of actually living 100% in the moment if that makes sense
yess I always don't know if it is appropriate to take a photo cause I'm scared I'm going to ruin the moment. But I really want something to remember the fun times by.
I think a photo's good! It only takes about a minute and even a single photo can be enough :) try and find a time when conversation is fading away to comfortable silence, I think? And don't forget, it's not that bad if you don't end up getting a photo!
I think sometimes not posting them is even nicer, that way you can keep it private if you want to but still have something digital to look at and remember it by
It would be so cool if Ashley started a podcast! It would be rly interesting to see what her insight is on diff topics and I for one would definitely listen to it
I go through this dilemma ALL THE TIME. Most of my friends don't like taking photos so sometimes I regret not having pictures from the time we spend together. But the best memories are usually made when you're living in the moment and having too much fun to think about taking pictures.
I love taking photos to have the memories but my friends detest taking photos and so I feel like I have to respect that. Though I’ll usually go through a moment without even thinking about taking my phone out and I enjoy living through it.
I hated having my photo taken, but then I read a story about this guy who was very close to his childhood best friend... Then when they were in their mid-20s, the best friend got into a fatal car accident. And the guy realised that he had no pictures of him and his best friend together. There were photos of himself, and photos of his best friend in separate pictures, but never together... He said he regretted not taking more pictures together. And that was the catalyst of me starting to take more photos with my family and friends. It's good to have something to remember good times. I've told this story to people and most of them understand where I'm coming from, and so they've become more accepting of me wanting to take photos of me and them, together.
I think a huge reason why we're so obsessed with recording every bit of our lives is because everything around us is rapidly and constantly changing. There has been no other time that has had as many technological advances, cultural awareness, and available knowledge. And because everything we know is constantly and rapidly changing, recording our lives and showcasing it will at least make something last forever.
I actually regret not having more pictures of my life when I was younger. So now I tend to overcompensate and take too many. But only me and my family sees the photos, I don't share or post on Social Media, so I have hoarded years of photos and I should probably get around to printing them.
This is why I deactivated all of my social media. Except TH-cam and Pinterest and I only follow inspiring content that fuels my mind. Humans are not designed to make posts. I want to live life, not spend it in my box. I agree it can be fun but it just isn’t for everyone.
SAME!!! im also 21 but i cant express my thoughts in words lol its really a struggle for me to convey random thoughts into a proper order thats why i love ashley so much huhu we have the SAME exact thoughts ahhhh
Stevie Pagwna write down all the things you are grateful for. Also compare yourself only to your past self. Life sucks, it is full of suffering for each and everyone of us. Only after accepting the fact that life is suffering can you really move on to appreciate it.
hey ashely i don't reall know what's going on but i just wanna say thank you for this video even though it must be really hard for you to edit and upload it :) wish you the best
@Angel Ramirez yes lol i know but you can't just assume they broke up base on a video or instagram. they haven't say anything yet and you never really know what's going on behind the screens
I personally dont like watching daily vloggers, I feel like I'm wasting my time instead of doing something productive with my life. But I like watching those non-vlogger-youtubers or CREATORS because they are actually creating something instead of just showing what they do in their lives.
i feel that and without sounding rude to you personally like in general, i’m glad they’re able to be their own people and move on from a relationship that wasn’t 100% i’m proud of her regardless honestly she’s doing so much
I went off of social media from the end of my freshman year in high school up until the second semester of my freshman year in college. I lost friends who probably kept me around for taking photos with them and the people who wanted to keep in touch with me were definitely the ones I appreciated the most. Getting back on social media after years of being off was actually terrifying and my “third person self” immediately turned back on and that sucked. Went back off again just to refresh and reset and it definitely made me feel better. Enjoying the moment is so important and it sucks when we get consumed in showing others how special life events are because I think inevitably it dilutes our experience. Overall social media is awesome but the way it changes your thoughts about yourself can really be tough on you when life is tough enough!
I got kinda happy when Ashley mentioned David thinking they're still together and happy Then realizing it was recorded in July. I'm hoping they're both doing well
"Everybody now looks at themselves almost from a third-person's view" so relatable I always imagine some mangaka is watching me and drawing out my life.
I have a friend who insists on taking pictures every single time we do anything, even just going to a café. It's a bit annoying tbh. It's not for social media since she doesn't have Facebook or Instagram, just purely for memories. And I get that, I too like having pictures to remember good times, but at this point it's so systematic that I feel forced to pose for her pics and they're not natural at all + the moment isn't fun anymore it's just awkward. I think a good rule of thumb is asking "hey do you mind if we take a pic later" and if the person doesn't seem enthusiastic about it just drop it.
As someone who's left social media, this resonated deep within me. All this pressure to be there and make 'friends' by being online is such a common thing that it not only makes it hard to not be on social media, but also it makes me keep forgetting my 'why'. Thanks for lending clarity to my thoughts Ashley💕 Lots of love from India
the video set up seems so casual and spontaneous but it singlehandedly nails exactly what I've been trying to articulate over the past like 2 years. Thank you Ashley for being the mature, insightful big sister we all need from time to time!
Hi Ashley I love you and your taking yourself on a date video inspired me to do that. I used to do that a lot as a high schooler (now a recent college grad working full-time) and I realized that, after getting to college, I always felt the need to arrange plans with other people or it didn't feel "worth" it. I remembered how much I used to love making plans with just myself so thank u :')
ok but why is it so important to photograph one good moment? when I’m focused on what I’m doing and actually enjoying it, taking photos is the last thing I think of
Ashley: *talks about TH-camrs with TH-cam friends they can always film* Me in my head: oh, David Dobrik Ashely a millisecond later: like David Dobrik Me: O.O
Honestly taking pictures and videos and watching it later is such a fun experience to me. Every time I look at my archive ig story, I get to look back at all the memories. It’s like a diary but rather than written, it’s there visually.
The whole “must document this moment” was a ocd issue for me back in the day. I felt stressed and panicked if i didnt capture the moment then feel the same if i didnt capture it again and again bc what if that pic wasnt great (like saving a game/document a second after you already hit save). I recently had the thought of why bother getting pretty clothes if i hate the social interaction, only to a second later be all like wtf, i got the clothes for me. I just got into vintage fashion and its like my social anxiety is at war with my “lets share this awesome stuff and bond over cool things” side.
Hey Ashley, just wanted to say that you keep doing you, never comprise you for anyone and always remember that you are valid and beautiful. We love you so much x
Why is this the best description I’ve heard about social media! I completely agree!! I saw someone post “why is it that I have no pictures with my closest friends” and it makes so much sense because when you are with your friends you get so invested in the moment you forget to take a picture, but then you remember but it feels awkward to ask because you are living in the moment. I just get what you’re saying so hard.
a great way to record moments is by keeping a diary! you don't have to worry about not being in the moment and you get to reflect on your day while recording every detail, not just the image of the setting
Honestly, for me, Instagram pressure is not a thing. But I do feel like I want to have a photographic proof of all my experiences. In my opinion, I think our generation has become much more nostalgic than our parents were, we feel like we have to be enjoying our lives to the fullest every single day or we aren't really living and those days when we don't feel like our life means much because of the routine, we just reminisce about the funnier better memories. For example, I went to Taiwan this summer and I tried to not take pictures and now I'm starting to loose the memories of the things I didn't photograph and for me it is as some of those things didn't even happen. Mostly I'm forgetting the feelings I felt that made me feel so alive. But anyways, I do agree with you that is a dilemma between recording the moment or experiencing and perhaps sacrificing one for the other would change how we live those moments we so much want to treasure.
I have the opposite dilemma lol. Before going to a social event or get together I always tell myself to take more photos so I can look back at the moment in the future. But every time I get to that moment, its either I forget to take pictures or I'm too shy to do it. It's neat that I can enjoy the moment as it is without the pictures but I have a pretty short term memory so the pictures would be nice too. Anyway, just my privileged 2 cents
ashley 😭somehow you managed to encapsulate all my feelings into this video. i relate to that guilty feeling of wanting to document every part of my life instead of just, living in the moment. a year ago i went to my favorite kpop artist's concert, determined to really "live in the moment". i didn't record most of it but now looking back, i can't help but to feel like i should have. that line "everybody looks at themselves almost from a third-person view" HITS me, thats exactly how i feel and i didn't know anyone else felt that way! thank you so much for sharing your feelings with us, have a great time in NYC
i recently deleted all of my social media accounts cause i was getting too invested in how people were living their lives but in the process,i lost control of mine. life without social media has been very liberating,cause whatever ive been doing is just for me,without that constant need for stranger's validation which comes with social media. this video speaks to my heart. love you so much for this ashley ❤
i absolutely love these kinds of thoughts and ideas. it is a very strange feeling when you’re left feeling empty due to the fact that you didn’t record/take a photo of something. it really makes you take a step back and analyze how you’ve spent time in social situations.
i loved how u talked about our tendencies to try and capture everything for everyone to see. it's something that I've dealt with before and seen everywhere (ig, fb, even linkedin lol) and made me think why my life wasn't this photogenic/instagrammable. but lately, I have definitely kind of "toughened up" and kinda grew away from wishing that I could be the one with the cute pics or cute friendos. honestly, i've got the people i need, and i much rather prefer living in the moment then telling others about my moments. thanks for brushing upon this topic-- i think it's great to acknowledge it :)
as a VERY nostalgic and reminiscent person, i feel this 100%. i always need records of memories, even if its like a literal bus ticket, bc i feel as though i'm always looking towards the past and as u said, reliving those happy moments and confirming it was rEAL. and if i dont have that, it doesnt feel real?? or it just feels very temporary. but as i'm gaining a deeper understanding of diff theories + philosophies, i'm trying to shift my attention to the present (the past causes melancholy whereas the future causes anxiety) and enjoy it as it is - and not worry about permanence. i'm happy you have people who are removed from narcissistic obsessions of capturing everything, which keep u humbled & grounded. i think people who are artists are inherently susceptible to romanticism, and esp with your film background, this is why you feel you see things from a third-person perspective. i'm definitely like this too, and i'm just trying to experience things with as much clarity as i can, and having ur phone or camera out really hinders this ability. obviously there are times when photographing & filming is a true blessing, capturing really special moments. but re: social media, i feel like it has placed this unnecessary emphasis on documenting your life. it's kind of all about validating yourself & your experiences, and seeking that out from other people. if ppl truly lived in the moment and didn't feel the need to prove anything to anyone, then the use of social media would be very minimal (there's def HUGE perks to social media too - i promise i'm no baby boomer screamin 'u damn millennial narcissists!!', i just feel like there should be a happy medium for the use of it) thank you for your thoughts on this & ur quality and insightful content!!!!!!! not 2 be a huge nerd (i prefer the term intellectual hoe.......) but if u have time u should check out alan watts re: living in the moment and theodor adorno re: culture industry - both have shaped a lot about what i think on this topic :~)
Maybe you could try journaling your experiences? That way you have time to reflect and feel nostalgic about your memories with the people you care about and also not feel pressured to have to share them with the internet. Loved the video♥️
I personally don’t think most people take photos because they want to have a record of it per se but because they want to “flex” where they’ve been and what they have done. You know for those sweet sweet likes and follows. People take lots of photos not for nostalgia purposes but as proof of their “cool” and “trendiness” because it is re enforced by their environment /friends etc. this isn’t necessarily wrong but I do believe this need to “flex” stems from insecurities and from a general thirst for attention which is perpetuated by America’s individualistic society.
This doesn’t apply to all people. As someone who doesn’t have Instagram or Facebook, etc., during my recent trip to my first time in China, I forced myself to get into the habit of taking pictures. This is because it was my first time visiting relatives and going to places my parents reminisced about in their past frequently despite already being 18 years old. The pictures and videos I took were for record’s sake, and I feel like there are plenty of others like me, but you can’t tell because their presence online isn’t felt as intensely as the people you described.
Sarcastic Ismyname I said most people because I know some people like you, including myself. I never take photos to the point where now I’m slowly realizing that in the future I will regret not having some photos of myself and those around me. Keep taking photos!
Oh, so relatable. I used to be obsessed with taking cute & aesthetic pictures, even going to places or hanging out with certain people just for the pictures, and I know now was kinda messed up. But for the past few years I have decided enough is enough. I don't share everything, I don't force anyone to take a picture just because of social media etc., and with that I've found that there is something special about keeping your private life private. People who truly care about me and are in my life know what's up and that is all that matters. But...one thing I sometimes miss is looking back at certain moments. Life moves so fast and it's hard to remember everything and pictures can be great tool to look back at glimpses of those beautiful memories. So...even tho I do not share nearly as much on social media, I try and take little shots of my everyday life. Like I take pictures with my friends, buildings, sunsets, shoes and totally random stuff to keep the memory, but without the intent to put it on social media just for the memory and if it doesn't stop the flow of the moment. If I don't take the picture I sometimes write the moment down to not forget, it's also a great way.
you said everything I am thinking about lately. sometimes ( okay.. almost all the time) my mind is a mess so much that it starts to be so fucking heavy and then someone (very often you) changes my twisted thougths into clear sentences and then I am so light and peaceful inside, because there are people that understand me. thank u Ashley! i really love when u talk about your thoughts
I love how she randomly starts talking about things that i also think about and through out the video im just nodding my head saying yes and YES. ILY 💛💜💚💙
I know it’s not the same, but I think journaling helps with that « fomo » from your own life you were mentioning. You can be with your friends without taking pictures or recording stuff, but you still get to look back and be emo and nostalgic at what you wrote down in your journal afterwards!
I feel like the ones that suffer more from this new wave of having online profiles play such a large part of our lives, are the ones that are photogenic enough or talented enough to meet the aesthetic standards. Because they’re actually capable of keeping up a good online presence, they start to take it more seriously and become more heavily involved. Then, before they know it they start to seek validation from their online interactions, like the number of likes they get etc. But those of us who are not photogenic and do not have any talent are less likely to get trapped cuz we already have other areas that we find validation and value in, outside of our looks since we don’t have much there to begin with. Those who start to find their validation online will do things like going to places just to take pictures, to the point where they don’t even take time to enjoy the places, and only look for spots to take pictures. Hanging out with friends when they’re doing this makes me feel like they don’t even value your company and they didn’t invite you cuz they wanted to spend time with you. It makes me feel like I’m just there to help take pictures. But being the less photogenic friend also makes me feel like a burden or the odd one out, cuz I’m not into taking photos or videos or snapchats cuz I know I’m not gonna look good in them. This just leaves me being an inconvenience to those who do want to take pictures, or sometimes I’m even left out. These are just my thoughts, obviously may not always be true or apply to everyone. Take it with a grain of salt.
I'm kinda glad I never got instagram, I wouldn't want to put all that pressure to have a presence online on myself, it sounds very stressful. I don't really have any photos with me and my friends like, at all, because when I meet up with them the thought of taking pics doesn't really pop into my head. I do find it a little sad on some days when I'm feeling sentimental and realise that I have forgotten some things and I have no photos to bring the memories back. However, at the same time, when I finally get to see my friends (it's not that easy anymore when you're in your 20s and everyone lives all over the country) I really don't like to pause the conversations just to pose for photos, I dunno, that feels uncomfortable to me for some reason. Might have something to do with me being unphotogenic lol
I really get what you are saying. I haven't seen my best friend for three months and a few days ago I got sad because I realized that I don't have any pictures of her.
Her voice is so soothing ,i can listen to it for hours, the audience wants a podcast (unless it'll stress you out or put added pressure on you ,then we dont want it)
While I completely agree with the how living with social media has sort of become this show we put on, I think we should separate recording parts of our experiences for ourselves from recording it for other people to see. My friends think I hate getting my picture clicked, but what I actually don't like is the fact that they might upload it somewhere. Because then I have to worry about how I look. But there is some value to be found in having some tangible item that brings back specific memories of a time- which is why I feel like we all keep small souvenirs, ticket stubs, and take photographs. Because it's so easy to take photos now and since they have become so synonymous with Instagram, we sort of forget how incredible it all really is. I mean, I love flipping back through my old photo albums and, pictures on my phone. They bring back specific sights and sounds and smells which I wouldn't otherwise remember. Nostalgia can be so comforting sometimes. So I don't think it necessarily takes anything away from the moment when we are recording solely for ourselves. Lmao THIS was a longass ramble sorry
I wholeheartedly agree and relate to everything you said in this video! I notice I constantly try to update my instagram story just so people can see how much fun im having but at the same time i just wanna document the fun times i have for myself. I sometimes have phases in my life where I completely forget stuff but photos i took during those moments help me remember and relive the moment. Not to mention im a really nostalgic person so i just NEED to take pictures and remember every good moment ive had so i can cry about it later lmao. But its definitely refreshing to just live in the moment and let some precious moments exist only in your memory!
Tbh you always talk about things i think about on my day to day life, and its so refreshing to listen to you and realize that its completely normal and that we all have this type of concerns 💚
wow i relate so much... whenever i'm with my friends i'm always like omg i wanna capture this moment but they're not that kind of people and they rarely post anything on social media while i see the 'popular' kids post every day and it seems like they're always having fun with their friends.... but now i'm really start to appreciate my friends for not being like that bc that really makes us enjoy the moment more
Omg i relate to this so much... i try to take as many pictures as possible because I like looking back at stuff but being concerned about the pictures alone really doesn’t help to enjoy a moment more or remember it better...one time I went looking at wedding dresses with a friend (it wasn’t too serious, as she just wanted to just have her first look around , buuuut..) and I nearly only remember being annoyed because I wasn’t allowed to take pictures of her in the dresses and how I could possibly sneak around the lady in the shop to actually take a picture. So now looking back I don’t remember any of the dresses she tried on or what she looked like... I was so concerned to take pictures to recall what we did than to actually try to remember it by memory alone...I’m sooo annoyed with myself still..
I feel like there’s this thing when you’re in LA and other large cities with people who are more cognizant of their media footprint. It makes you think that everyone is into building a vapid social media empire. What I’ve learned is that there’s always people who love to immortalize their lives in photos, but others who would prefer to just remember through memories. I just keep those around me that I’m comfortable with, and strike that balance within myself.
wow, this couldn't have been said any better .. i have been binge watching your videos because of your vibe and uplifting personality! I'm so glad to have tumble upon your channel ♡
i think journaling and writing down what you want to remember is a great way to deal with what you described, you get to be totally in the moment and at the same time 'save' memories of it. later on you are still able to have that nostalgic feeling by reading what you wrote
Yes!! I think about this all the time. Even that anxiety you had for prom, I feel like I have it all the time. Any time I go out, if I don't feel like I'll look good for pictures, it immediately brings my mood down and... it's exhausting. Sometimes I feel like something's wrong with me because I don't post on my stories often enough like other people do, but this reminded me that maybe it's good to not feel pressured into being addicted to social media in that way.
I Feel like journaling could be a great option, instead of taking pictures of your day/vacations you write down those moments, feelings you had, anecdotes etc...
THIS was too real. why i love you ashley, im glad you can take a step back and catch yourself when you feel burnt out, glad you recognize these pressures and arent losing yourself
I love how goofy she is. I think she deserves a really good likeable person in her life because talking to a camera all the time can really be depressing on the long run.
Idk how you talk so eloquently and simply understandably about a broad subject like this, but I rly rly love listening to you talk. It's insightful and thought provoking, but also so calming. I know other people have mentioned it, but I'd love to listen if you started a podcast!
This is really great to hear. I’ve been noticing a lot lately that people are interested in travelling places just “for the photos”. Rather than actually going there to be there.
to me it tends to feel like if i don’t document the moment it might just disappear and all its value will somehow vanish, and even though i know that’s not true it’s still so consuming i hope i’m not the only one lol
i feel this so much, like in the last two years i’ve noticed i just don’t really take any photos or videos anymore unless someone else wants to because at least i know at the end of my life, *I* know that *I* enjoyed moments of my life that no one else knows about or saw but i lived them and loved them. and also being a film student is great cause i can just recreate those moments in the stories i tell and then look back on that like it’s a memory sorta thing
This is why I love disposable/film cameras. You can take a photo in the moment, but you can't see the way it looks after. I like how candid the photos turn out and I don't feel like I need to pose/take the same photo over and over again to make it look "perfect". I can keep the silly photos for remembering, but I also don't feel like I'm experiencing my life through a lens all the time.
Hey I just wanted to say thank you for all that you do. I love your channels and it really has inspired me to get my shit together (or at least try to). As well as make content again. I’ve been so hesitant to make videos again but your drive has hella pushed me. I’m a communication media arts senior and all the jobs and Internships I’m trying to apply for require my channel url. So thank you for your tip videos and I hope one day my videos are as incredible as yours!!! Stay strong and keep being the queen you are!👑💕
I love your insight, Ashley!! I can totally relate to that third person view/FOMO of your own life. Sometimes it feels like I am living disingenuiously when I am thinking about Instagram likes at a concert, for example. Thank you so much for sharing.
I like what you were saying abut viewing yourself from a third party perspective constantly. I can definitely relate to that and the pressure that I put on myself because of that, but I've never heard anyone put it that way before. I dunno, it just really resonated with me. Love these sit down and chat videos you do. I feel like I always get something out of them. You're very well spoken and have an interesting mind!
who’s ready for a meaningful and intelligent video? *me.*
emily hope Amen👍🏼
Literally 👌🏽
hi same
What about recording the trip but not posting it?
You can enjoy it just for you?
Animation Geek that’s true but it still comes down to the same idea that you’re not going to be fully present in the moment. You’re really thinking about the future if you want to record and look back on it instead of actually living 100% in the moment if that makes sense
yess I always don't know if it is appropriate to take a photo cause I'm scared I'm going to ruin the moment. But I really want something to remember the fun times by.
I think a photo's good! It only takes about a minute and even a single photo can be enough :) try and find a time when conversation is fading away to comfortable silence, I think? And don't forget, it's not that bad if you don't end up getting a photo!
It’s good to take photos whether you’re going to post it anyways.
I think sometimes not posting them is even nicer, that way you can keep it private if you want to but still have something digital to look at and remember it by
Exactlyy
New video? I'm *bestblessed*
Donia Parsi love that pun 👏🤧😂💕
Donia Parsi you did that 👏🏽
🤣
wow, I'm jealous that I didn't think of that one😂👏
ehehe
bro we need a podcast i would love to listen to you talk for hours!! so insightful
peyton talt definitely
!!!!
peyton talt yes!!
Yes podcast!!
Best idea ever
It would be so cool if Ashley started a podcast! It would be rly interesting to see what her insight is on diff topics and I for one would definitely listen to it
Molly YES YES YSS
YES
YES.
Agreed
Omg YES
this might seem random but i love the way you talk
that makes two of us! I love how she talks omg she should absolutely begin an podcast
Three.of.us.
I was just about to comment this. That makes four of us !
5 of this. I dont know where this is going..
that makes 6 of us
I go through this dilemma ALL THE TIME. Most of my friends don't like taking photos so sometimes I regret not having pictures from the time we spend together.
But the best memories are usually made when you're living in the moment and having too much fun to think about taking pictures.
I love taking photos to have the memories but my friends detest taking photos and so I feel like I have to respect that. Though I’ll usually go through a moment without even thinking about taking my phone out and I enjoy living through it.
I hated having my photo taken, but then I read a story about this guy who was very close to his childhood best friend... Then when they were in their mid-20s, the best friend got into a fatal car accident. And the guy realised that he had no pictures of him and his best friend together. There were photos of himself, and photos of his best friend in separate pictures, but never together... He said he regretted not taking more pictures together.
And that was the catalyst of me starting to take more photos with my family and friends. It's good to have something to remember good times. I've told this story to people and most of them understand where I'm coming from, and so they've become more accepting of me wanting to take photos of me and them, together.
I think a huge reason why we're so obsessed with recording every bit of our lives is because everything around us is rapidly and constantly changing. There has been no other time that has had as many technological advances, cultural awareness, and available knowledge. And because everything we know is constantly and rapidly changing, recording our lives and showcasing it will at least make something last forever.
*your content is consistently great*
truth
"Enjoying the moment isn't enough for us anymore" It scary how much truth this statement has
The
"If you didnt take a picture of it, did it really happen"
Mentality
I actually regret not having more pictures of my life when I was younger. So now I tend to overcompensate and take too many. But only me and my family sees the photos, I don't share or post on Social Media, so I have hoarded years of photos and I should probably get around to printing them.
Same!!
I think journaling is perhaps a healthier way to keep a record of your experiences.
This is why I deactivated all of my social media. Except TH-cam and Pinterest and I only follow inspiring content that fuels my mind. Humans are not designed to make posts. I want to live life, not spend it in my box. I agree it can be fun but it just isn’t for everyone.
Same I only have TH-cam and Pinterest, and it’s helped me mentally so much
same deleted all my socials & have been happy (:
i love the "old school talking about my feelings Ashely" youtube videos
I think you are the only person who works in social media who is not consumed by it. It's refreshing. Thank you Ashley
I love hearing your thoughts on adult life/society/social stuff, I'm the same age and hearing you put all my feelings in words is wild
SAME!!! im also 21 but i cant express my thoughts in words lol its really a struggle for me to convey random thoughts into a proper order thats why i love ashley so much huhu we have the SAME exact thoughts ahhhh
i'm still young yet i'm so excited to be at her stage...
Please make a video "what to do when you think life sucks " . I would appreciate it so much.
Love xxx
Stevie Pagwna write down all the things you are grateful for. Also compare yourself only to your past self. Life sucks, it is full of suffering for each and everyone of us. Only after accepting the fact that life is suffering can you really move on to appreciate it.
@@juliette1945 you're right, thank u 🌈
yes please do this i need it so much!
My phone solves this problem for me by not having enough storage...
is it an apple iphone
Haha that’s always me 😂
sooo relatable. I don't get anxiety by thinking of taking a photo each and every time
Same 😂
:DDD
hey ashely i don't reall know what's going on but i just wanna say thank you for this video even though it must be really hard for you to edit and upload it :) wish you the best
@Angel Ramirez yes lol i know but you can't just assume they broke up base on a video or instagram. they haven't say anything yet and you never really know what's going on behind the screens
@Angel Ramirez Wait, what makes you think they broke up??
Angela Law in her last vid she said she was single in the caption. :/
@@daniriffe8069 really sorry i didn't read the description carefully
She says in the video she talks about being single. Not that she herself is single
neeeeeddd a podcast !! i could listen to you speak for hours, you are so wise !
man! i cant even form a sentence when im hungover & sis out here contemplating on life and big social issues
WAIT I RELATE TO THIS ALL SO MUCH WOW
I personally dont like watching daily vloggers, I feel like I'm wasting my time instead of doing something productive with my life. But I like watching those non-vlogger-youtubers or CREATORS because they are actually creating something instead of just showing what they do in their lives.
I’m a mess right now thank you for this I really needed it
ᄋᄌᄋcall me baby girl same
Omg , I was gonna comment you'll be okay bby girl and then I saw ur username ..... Telepathy who biss 😅😅
Correction: You're always a mess
InfiniteLoop true
just here to say i really appreciate how honest and genuine you always are in your videos. you really do feel like our youtube big sister
exactly this!!
I'm sad because I thought Ashley and David made up but then I read the description and it says this was recorded in July:(
dude same, it hurts.
wait what? did they break up?
nefos i think so :((( they stopped following each other on instagram and i seemed to get that message from her recent video on her main channel too
i feel that and without sounding rude to you personally like in general, i’m glad they’re able to be their own people and move on from a relationship that wasn’t 100% i’m proud of her regardless honestly she’s doing so much
Roselynn completely agree! i hope they both are happy no matter what
I went off of social media from the end of my freshman year in high school up until the second semester of my freshman year in college. I lost friends who probably kept me around for taking photos with them and the people who wanted to keep in touch with me were definitely the ones I appreciated the most. Getting back on social media after years of being off was actually terrifying and my “third person self” immediately turned back on and that sucked. Went back off again just to refresh and reset and it definitely made me feel better. Enjoying the moment is so important and it sucks when we get consumed in showing others how special life events are because I think inevitably it dilutes our experience. Overall social media is awesome but the way it changes your thoughts about yourself can really be tough on you when life is tough enough!
I got kinda happy when Ashley mentioned David thinking they're still together and happy
Then realizing it was recorded in July.
I'm hoping they're both doing well
"Everybody now looks at themselves almost from a third-person's view" so relatable I always imagine some mangaka is watching me and drawing out my life.
I have a friend who insists on taking pictures every single time we do anything, even just going to a café. It's a bit annoying tbh. It's not for social media since she doesn't have Facebook or Instagram, just purely for memories. And I get that, I too like having pictures to remember good times, but at this point it's so systematic that I feel forced to pose for her pics and they're not natural at all + the moment isn't fun anymore it's just awkward. I think a good rule of thumb is asking "hey do you mind if we take a pic later" and if the person doesn't seem enthusiastic about it just drop it.
“social media seriously harms your mental health.”
As someone who's left social media, this resonated deep within me. All this pressure to be there and make 'friends' by being online is such a common thing that it not only makes it hard to not be on social media, but also it makes me keep forgetting my 'why'. Thanks for lending clarity to my thoughts Ashley💕
Lots of love from India
the video set up seems so casual and spontaneous but it singlehandedly nails exactly what I've been trying to articulate over the past like 2 years. Thank you Ashley for being the mature, insightful big sister we all need from time to time!
petition for Ashley to start a podcast
Hi Ashley I love you and your taking yourself on a date video inspired me to do that. I used to do that a lot as a high schooler (now a recent college grad working full-time) and I realized that, after getting to college, I always felt the need to arrange plans with other people or it didn't feel "worth" it. I remembered how much I used to love making plans with just myself so thank u :')
ok but why is it so important to photograph one good moment? when I’m focused on what I’m doing and actually enjoying it, taking photos is the last thing I think of
This is the MOST relatable thing. Wanna have cute photos/videos to look back on but don’t wanna ruin the moment.
Ashley: *talks about TH-camrs with TH-cam friends they can always film*
Me in my head: oh, David Dobrik
Ashely a millisecond later: like David Dobrik
Me: O.O
We're the same person😲😲
Honestly taking pictures and videos and watching it later is such a fun experience to me. Every time I look at my archive ig story, I get to look back at all the memories. It’s like a diary but rather than written, it’s there visually.
The whole “must document this moment” was a ocd issue for me back in the day. I felt stressed and panicked if i didnt capture the moment then feel the same if i didnt capture it again and again bc what if that pic wasnt great (like saving a game/document a second after you already hit save). I recently had the thought of why bother getting pretty clothes if i hate the social interaction, only to a second later be all like wtf, i got the clothes for me. I just got into vintage fashion and its like my social anxiety is at war with my “lets share this awesome stuff and bond over cool things” side.
Journaling is a nice alternative where you can document things for yourself but not feel like you’re overstepping others’ boundaries.
the prom thing is so true like we spend hours looking good, but just for photos. lol
she's so relatable without trying to be relatable. it's called being honest
Hey Ashley, just wanted to say that you keep doing you, never comprise you for anyone and always remember that you are valid and beautiful. We love you so much x
Why is this the best description I’ve heard about social media! I completely agree!! I saw someone post “why is it that I have no pictures with my closest friends” and it makes so much sense because when you are with your friends you get so invested in the moment you forget to take a picture, but then you remember but it feels awkward to ask because you are living in the moment. I just get what you’re saying so hard.
a great way to record moments is by keeping a diary! you don't have to worry about not being in the moment and you get to reflect on your day while recording every detail, not just the image of the setting
Honestly, for me, Instagram pressure is not a thing. But I do feel like I want to have a photographic proof of all my experiences. In my opinion, I think our generation has become much more nostalgic than our parents were, we feel like we have to be enjoying our lives to the fullest every single day or we aren't really living and those days when we don't feel like our life means much because of the routine, we just reminisce about the funnier better memories. For example, I went to Taiwan this summer and I tried to not take pictures and now I'm starting to loose the memories of the things I didn't photograph and for me it is as some of those things didn't even happen. Mostly I'm forgetting the feelings I felt that made me feel so alive. But anyways, I do agree with you that is a dilemma between recording the moment or experiencing and perhaps sacrificing one for the other would change how we live those moments we so much want to treasure.
It’s 2021 and I’m still here🥺
thank you for articulating these thoughts. i am always stuck between wanting to live in the moment vs wanting to document and remember my life.
I have the opposite dilemma lol. Before going to a social event or get together I always tell myself to take more photos so I can look back at the moment in the future. But every time I get to that moment, its either I forget to take pictures or I'm too shy to do it. It's neat that I can enjoy the moment as it is without the pictures but I have a pretty short term memory so the pictures would be nice too. Anyway, just my privileged 2 cents
ashley 😭somehow you managed to encapsulate all my feelings into this video. i relate to that guilty feeling of wanting to document every part of my life instead of just, living in the moment. a year ago i went to my favorite kpop artist's concert, determined to really "live in the moment". i didn't record most of it but now looking back, i can't help but to feel like i should have. that line "everybody looks at themselves almost from a third-person view" HITS me, thats exactly how i feel and i didn't know anyone else felt that way! thank you so much for sharing your feelings with us, have a great time in NYC
i recently deleted all of my social media accounts cause i was getting too invested in how people were living their lives but in the process,i lost control of mine. life without social media has been very liberating,cause whatever ive been doing is just for me,without that constant need for stranger's validation which comes with social media. this video speaks to my heart. love you so much for this ashley ❤
i absolutely love these kinds of thoughts and ideas. it is a very strange feeling when you’re left feeling empty due to the fact that you didn’t record/take a photo of something. it really makes you take a step back and analyze how you’ve spent time in social situations.
ASHLEY: New York was the closest major city to me besides D.C.
ME, A PHILADELPHIAN: ...damn
Me, a Baltimorean: well..ok then
(baltimore has the same population as dc!!)
yeah i’m from md and we always skip philadelphia lol
i loved how u talked about our tendencies to try and capture everything for everyone to see. it's something that I've dealt with before and seen everywhere (ig, fb, even linkedin lol) and made me think why my life wasn't this photogenic/instagrammable. but lately, I have definitely kind of "toughened up" and kinda grew away from wishing that I could be the one with the cute pics or cute friendos. honestly, i've got the people i need, and i much rather prefer living in the moment then telling others about my moments. thanks for brushing upon this topic-- i think it's great to acknowledge it :)
I always love and appreciate your honesty in your videos
as a VERY nostalgic and reminiscent person, i feel this 100%. i always need records of memories, even if its like a literal bus ticket, bc i feel as though i'm always looking towards the past and as u said, reliving those happy moments and confirming it was rEAL. and if i dont have that, it doesnt feel real?? or it just feels very temporary. but as i'm gaining a deeper understanding of diff theories + philosophies, i'm trying to shift my attention to the present (the past causes melancholy whereas the future causes anxiety) and enjoy it as it is - and not worry about permanence. i'm happy you have people who are removed from narcissistic obsessions of capturing everything, which keep u humbled & grounded.
i think people who are artists are inherently susceptible to romanticism, and esp with your film background, this is why you feel you see things from a third-person perspective. i'm definitely like this too, and i'm just trying to experience things with as much clarity as i can, and having ur phone or camera out really hinders this ability. obviously there are times when photographing & filming is a true blessing, capturing really special moments. but re: social media, i feel like it has placed this unnecessary emphasis on documenting your life. it's kind of all about validating yourself & your experiences, and seeking that out from other people. if ppl truly lived in the moment and didn't feel the need to prove anything to anyone, then the use of social media would be very minimal (there's def HUGE perks to social media too - i promise i'm no baby boomer screamin 'u damn millennial narcissists!!', i just feel like there should be a happy medium for the use of it)
thank you for your thoughts on this & ur quality and insightful content!!!!!!! not 2 be a huge nerd (i prefer the term intellectual hoe.......) but if u have time u should check out alan watts re: living in the moment and theodor adorno re: culture industry - both have shaped a lot about what i think on this topic :~)
I love these "old school" youtube style videos, like just hearing your thoughts and feelings ahh I love it
Maybe you could try journaling your experiences? That way you have time to reflect and feel nostalgic about your memories with the people you care about and also not feel pressured to have to share them with the internet. Loved the video♥️
I personally don’t think most people take photos because they want to have a record of it per se but because they want to “flex” where they’ve been and what they have done. You know for those sweet sweet likes and follows. People take lots of photos not for nostalgia purposes but as proof of their “cool” and “trendiness” because it is re enforced by their environment /friends etc. this isn’t necessarily wrong but I do believe this need to “flex” stems from insecurities and from a general thirst for attention which is perpetuated by America’s individualistic society.
Well said 👌
This doesn’t apply to all people. As someone who doesn’t have Instagram or Facebook, etc., during my recent trip to my first time in China, I forced myself to get into the habit of taking pictures. This is because it was my first time visiting relatives and going to places my parents reminisced about in their past frequently despite already being 18 years old. The pictures and videos I took were for record’s sake, and I feel like there are plenty of others like me, but you can’t tell because their presence online isn’t felt as intensely as the people you described.
Sarcastic Ismyname I said most people because I know some people like you, including myself. I never take photos to the point where now I’m slowly realizing that in the future I will regret not having some photos of myself and those around me. Keep taking photos!
M. rta. Yes but I think the need to show off comes from peoples need for attention. also social media is designed to be addicting.
Oh, so relatable. I used to be obsessed with taking cute & aesthetic pictures, even going to places or hanging out with certain people just for the pictures, and I know now was kinda messed up. But for the past few years I have decided enough is enough. I don't share everything, I don't force anyone to take a picture just because of social media etc., and with that I've found that there is something special about keeping your private life private. People who truly care about me and are in my life know what's up and that is all that matters. But...one thing I sometimes miss is looking back at certain moments. Life moves so fast and it's hard to remember everything and pictures can be great tool to look back at glimpses of those beautiful memories. So...even tho I do not share nearly as much on social media, I try and take little shots of my everyday life. Like I take pictures with my friends, buildings, sunsets, shoes and totally random stuff to keep the memory, but without the intent to put it on social media just for the memory and if it doesn't stop the flow of the moment. If I don't take the picture I sometimes write the moment down to not forget, it's also a great way.
Ashley.
*Laughs *
The best joy in TH-cam.
you said everything I am thinking about lately. sometimes ( okay.. almost all the time) my mind is a mess so much that it starts to be so fucking heavy and then someone (very often you) changes my twisted thougths into clear sentences and then I am so light and peaceful inside, because there are people that understand me. thank u Ashley! i really love when u talk about your thoughts
This is exactly what I have been feeling for soooo long! 💗💗
i love these honest, chill talking videos where youre not even trying and i still love your personality❤️
I’m *stressing* because school starts tomorrow and now that my queen posted everything is ok
dude bro good luck in school homie!!! u will b just fine
I love how she randomly starts talking about things that i also think about and through out the video im just nodding my head saying yes and YES. ILY 💛💜💚💙
I know it’s not the same, but I think journaling helps with that « fomo » from your own life you were mentioning. You can be with your friends without taking pictures or recording stuff, but you still get to look back and be emo and nostalgic at what you wrote down in your journal afterwards!
I feel like the ones that suffer more from this new wave of having online profiles play such a large part of our lives, are the ones that are photogenic enough or talented enough to meet the aesthetic standards. Because they’re actually capable of keeping up a good online presence, they start to take it more seriously and become more heavily involved. Then, before they know it they start to seek validation from their online interactions, like the number of likes they get etc. But those of us who are not photogenic and do not have any talent are less likely to get trapped cuz we already have other areas that we find validation and value in, outside of our looks since we don’t have much there to begin with. Those who start to find their validation online will do things like going to places just to take pictures, to the point where they don’t even take time to enjoy the places, and only look for spots to take pictures. Hanging out with friends when they’re doing this makes me feel like they don’t even value your company and they didn’t invite you cuz they wanted to spend time with you. It makes me feel like I’m just there to help take pictures.
But being the less photogenic friend also makes me feel like a burden or the odd one out, cuz I’m not into taking photos or videos or snapchats cuz I know I’m not gonna look good in them. This just leaves me being an inconvenience to those who do want to take pictures, or sometimes I’m even left out.
These are just my thoughts, obviously may not always be true or apply to everyone. Take it with a grain of salt.
I'm kinda glad I never got instagram, I wouldn't want to put all that pressure to have a presence online on myself, it sounds very stressful. I don't really have any photos with me and my friends like, at all, because when I meet up with them the thought of taking pics doesn't really pop into my head. I do find it a little sad on some days when I'm feeling sentimental and realise that I have forgotten some things and I have no photos to bring the memories back. However, at the same time, when I finally get to see my friends (it's not that easy anymore when you're in your 20s and everyone lives all over the country) I really don't like to pause the conversations just to pose for photos, I dunno, that feels uncomfortable to me for some reason. Might have something to do with me being unphotogenic lol
I really get what you are saying. I haven't seen my best friend for three months and a few days ago I got sad because I realized that I don't have any pictures of her.
Her voice is so soothing ,i can listen to it for hours, the audience wants a podcast (unless it'll stress you out or put added pressure on you ,then we dont want it)
While I completely agree with the how living with social media has sort of become this show we put on, I think we should separate recording parts of our experiences for ourselves from recording it for other people to see. My friends think I hate getting my picture clicked, but what I actually don't like is the fact that they might upload it somewhere. Because then I have to worry about how I look.
But there is some value to be found in having some tangible item that brings back specific memories of a time- which is why I feel like we all keep small souvenirs, ticket stubs, and take photographs. Because it's so easy to take photos now and since they have become so synonymous with Instagram, we sort of forget how incredible it all really is. I mean, I love flipping back through my old photo albums and, pictures on my phone. They bring back specific sights and sounds and smells which I wouldn't otherwise remember. Nostalgia can be so comforting sometimes. So I don't think it necessarily takes anything away from the moment when we are recording solely for ourselves. Lmao THIS was a longass ramble sorry
I wholeheartedly agree and relate to everything you said in this video! I notice I constantly try to update my instagram story just so people can see how much fun im having but at the same time i just wanna document the fun times i have for myself. I sometimes have phases in my life where I completely forget stuff but photos i took during those moments help me remember and relive the moment. Not to mention im a really nostalgic person so i just NEED to take pictures and remember every good moment ive had so i can cry about it later lmao. But its definitely refreshing to just live in the moment and let some precious moments exist only in your memory!
Tbh you always talk about things i think about on my day to day life, and its so refreshing to listen to you and realize that its completely normal and that we all have this type of concerns 💚
wow i relate so much... whenever i'm with my friends i'm always like omg i wanna capture this moment but they're not that kind of people and they rarely post anything on social media while i see the 'popular' kids post every day and it seems like they're always having fun with their friends.... but now i'm really start to appreciate my friends for not being like that bc that really makes us enjoy the moment more
how does she literally always look good?
Omg i relate to this so much... i try to take as many pictures as possible because I like looking back at stuff but being concerned about the pictures alone really doesn’t help to enjoy a moment more or remember it better...one time I went looking at wedding dresses with a friend (it wasn’t too serious, as she just wanted to just have her first look around , buuuut..) and I nearly only remember being annoyed because I wasn’t allowed to take pictures of her in the dresses and how I could possibly sneak around the lady in the shop to actually take a picture. So now looking back I don’t remember any of the dresses she tried on or what she looked like... I was so concerned to take pictures to recall what we did than to actually try to remember it by memory alone...I’m sooo annoyed with myself still..
I feel like there’s this thing when you’re in LA and other large cities with people who are more cognizant of their media footprint. It makes you think that everyone is into building a vapid social media empire. What I’ve learned is that there’s always people who love to immortalize their lives in photos, but others who would prefer to just remember through memories. I just keep those around me that I’m comfortable with, and strike that balance within myself.
wow, this couldn't have been said any better .. i have been binge watching your videos because of your vibe and uplifting personality! I'm so glad to have tumble upon your channel ♡
whenever I post something I’m always like.. Will people think I’m trying to hard, will they think I’m annoying..
i think journaling and writing down what you want to remember is a great way to deal with what you described, you get to be totally in the moment and at the same time 'save' memories of it. later on you are still able to have that nostalgic feeling by reading what you wrote
How is it that even with messy hair you still look good?!
Anyways, I hope your trip was super fun😊
david's hair looked better lmao
jk
Yes!! I think about this all the time. Even that anxiety you had for prom, I feel like I have it all the time. Any time I go out, if I don't feel like I'll look good for pictures, it immediately brings my mood down and... it's exhausting. Sometimes I feel like something's wrong with me because I don't post on my stories often enough like other people do, but this reminded me that maybe it's good to not feel pressured into being addicted to social media in that way.
I Feel like journaling could be a great option, instead of taking pictures of your day/vacations you write down those moments, feelings you had, anecdotes etc...
THIS was too real. why i love you ashley, im glad you can take a step back and catch yourself when you feel burnt out, glad you recognize these pressures and arent losing yourself
I love how goofy she is. I think she deserves a really good likeable person in her life because talking to a camera all the time can really be depressing on the long run.
Idk how you talk so eloquently and simply understandably about a broad subject like this, but I rly rly love listening to you talk. It's insightful and thought provoking, but also so calming. I know other people have mentioned it, but I'd love to listen if you started a podcast!
The millisecond I saw the notification I clicked
Alexa Zubia frr real
This is really great to hear. I’ve been noticing a lot lately that people are interested in travelling places just “for the photos”. Rather than actually going there to be there.
to me it tends to feel like if i don’t document the moment it might just disappear and all its value will somehow vanish, and even though i know that’s not true it’s still so consuming
i hope i’m not the only one lol
i feel this so much, like in the last two years i’ve noticed i just don’t really take any photos or videos anymore unless someone else wants to because at least i know at the end of my life, *I* know that *I* enjoyed moments of my life that no one else knows about or saw but i lived them and loved them. and also being a film student is great cause i can just recreate those moments in the stories i tell and then look back on that like it’s a memory sorta thing
me: *thinks about how social media is affecting me*
ashley: *posts video about social media*
me: great minds think alike 😎🤙
This is why I love disposable/film cameras. You can take a photo in the moment, but you can't see the way it looks after. I like how candid the photos turn out and I don't feel like I need to pose/take the same photo over and over again to make it look "perfect". I can keep the silly photos for remembering, but I also don't feel like I'm experiencing my life through a lens all the time.
Wow I’m so early that TH-cam is not on drugs. 1 view 1 like and 0 comments
I really love Ashley and I was inspired to make my own platform! Support a starting channel out! Subscribe 💜
Nastasia Philip ik like it’ll say no views and then say 47 likes
she’s so down to earth and just intelligent and open minded
Hey I just wanted to say thank you for all that you do. I love your channels and it really has inspired me to get my shit together (or at least try to). As well as make content again. I’ve been so hesitant to make videos again but your drive has hella pushed me. I’m a communication media arts senior and all the jobs and Internships I’m trying to apply for require my channel url.
So thank you for your tip videos and I hope one day my videos are as incredible as yours!!! Stay strong and keep being the queen you are!👑💕
I love your insight, Ashley!! I can totally relate to that third person view/FOMO of your own life. Sometimes it feels like I am living disingenuiously when I am thinking about Instagram likes at a concert, for example. Thank you so much for sharing.
Smart, intelligent and very mature. Love this so much! Thank u for sharing ❤️ love ya from Italy 🇮🇹❤️💕
I like what you were saying abut viewing yourself from a third party perspective constantly. I can definitely relate to that and the pressure that I put on myself because of that, but I've never heard anyone put it that way before. I dunno, it just really resonated with me.
Love these sit down and chat videos you do. I feel like I always get something out of them. You're very well spoken and have an interesting mind!