Big yikes at these comments. Thanks for the video! Men so often seem to conflate discussion about toxic masculinity as a personal attack, but it’s not. Glad that you bring up that it’s harmful to the individual dealing with it, not just those around them. I love seeing the cultural shift where men are becoming more comfortable being gentle, vulnerable, and kind. (Zeitgeist is a fun word.)
i'm covering the Skibicki case in my podcasts on Rumble and your name came up as being involved in the case and as a part of my research, i watched a few of your videos and subscribed because i really enjoy your content! keep up the good work and never give up
I’m currently experiencing toxic masculinity from a male whom I thought was my friend. He is suffering delusions and is very psychologically unstable. Being abused and shouted at publicly by someone mentally unstable who uses standover tactics is frightening. There were warning signs that he had a big problem - believing he had won expensive cars, houses; buying big items that never turn up but keep coming tomorrow, this week, next week for months…threatening other people, heavy harassment and even threatening to put his dog on people. I turned a blind eye to the behaviour and now it’s turned on me for no reason other than something perceived by the individual that lacks any reality…and it’s heavy! Is this a lack of testosterone or too much testosterone?
A thought provoking explanation of toxic masculinity which I can relate to as a generation X. I also can imagine how volatile and claustrophobic the atmosphere was when you worked in the therapeutic community. My ex was a "tough guy" that had old fashioned views on womens roles and behaviour. As I got older society views and mine changed. However I did feel protected by his perceived strength. One day our son's nursery dressed the boys up as girls. They wore dresses and carried out play role reversal cooking and cleaning tasks. The cooking and cleaning tasks were fine but I wasn't so sure about the dressing up as it seemed forced and not normal play that he initiated himself.
The politics of the social sciences have become so intrenched with politics that toxic femininity can never be attended. In fact, it seems as if there is a presupposition that femininity is intrinsically better than masculinity. This says all that needs to be said. There is a time to laugh and a time to cry. The Greeks would be laughing at us.
Idk bro I dont really think much about this stuff its just not that big of a deal. Idk where all these toxic femininity are Ive only ever met one and she wasn't well liked most places she went.
@@Epic-so3ek Sure, but the entire "toxic masculinity" idea is predicated on aggression and (basically) lack of emotional intelligence. It's absurd to link only these traits to masculinity. It's also against the rules to link toxicity toward females who have these same traits. Why? And why is that those who open the discussion of toxic masculinity can never talk of the benefits of stoicism or even warranted aggression? Why are they also typically aggressive in demanding you take their side? It's all just a bunch of political silliness that can't withstand its own philosophical and psychological weight.
@Dr.Das: How would you call it, if a single mother tought her son(s) to surpress their emotions, to be dominant and "if necessary" aggressive towards others, to discourage seeking help and also tought them racist, homophobic and sexist bullshit? Would the mom also be "toxicly masculine" or would she be "toxicly feminine"?
Since you didn't get a reply, I'll try to answer. She's neither. The son isn't "toxicly masculine" either. This is not how the term is used. Mother and son may engage in the promotion of toxic masculinity but it doesn't necessarily mean that they are toxic themselves. And clearly, women can very often be complicit in the spreading of toxic masculinity. Women too live in a male-dominated world and they are (perhaps sadly) often well adapted to it. So in that vein a woman may encourage her son to conform to unhealthy masculine stereotypes, even if it goes against his own character and mental wellbeing, because she believes that he has better chances of being successful in life and in society if he "mans up". Or a woman may reject a (potential) partner because he dares to show vulnerability, which she may think is indicative of weakness and therefore unmanly. Et cetera. In short, the mentality and ideology of toxic masculinity doesn't necessarily only exist in men. Toxic femininity would be the situation where women are pressured or forced to conform to stereotypes of femininity. Be cute, be submissive, be helpless/dependent, don't dream of getting an education because you'll be a mum anyway, that sort of thing. Not surprisingly toxic masculinity usually goes hand-in-hand with toxic femininity. What they have in common is the toxicity, and a strong emphasis on inflexible, essential gender differences. It limits people in the way they can express their own selves outside idealised prescibed roles. I believe that toxic masculinity is often seen as the greater problem because of the potential for violence. It's a very oppressive phenomenon. Toxic femininity on the other hand may just seem sad. But think of them both as manifestations of the same problem: gender essentialism within the context of a patriarchal (male-dominated) society. I hope that makes sense to you.
But there is a stereotype of overt masculinity in society, and there is an exaggerated and contorted version of it where, for instance, men act like it's gay to even care about each other. There are women that overdo the female stereotypes, pretending to be more helpless than they are, overreacting, unaccountability, stuff like that. I think it's more about parenting, like forcing your kid to "man up" if he doesn't fit the stereotype.
Depends what you consider toxic, if it's domestic violence, r-pe and other forms of abusive behaviour- then these are way more frequent in men, than women, not exclusively, of course, but more common.
I think you've misunderstood the term. Toxic masculinity is where the typical values associated with being a man are exaggerated to a point where they become harmful. It is not simply another term for someone acting like a jerk. Now, I'm not an expert on "toxic femininity", but I guess it would be the same thing, where the typical values around being a woman are exaggerated to a point where they're harmful. An example could be a woman who is so obsessed with being beautiful or fashionable that it harms her mental health - perhaps she is abusive to other woman who she thinks doesn't meet the "correct" beauty standards, or becomes addicted to plastic surgery in the search for the "perfect body".
Big yikes at these comments. Thanks for the video!
Men so often seem to conflate discussion about toxic masculinity as a personal attack, but it’s not. Glad that you bring up that it’s harmful to the individual dealing with it, not just those around them.
I love seeing the cultural shift where men are becoming more comfortable being gentle, vulnerable, and kind. (Zeitgeist is a fun word.)
i'm covering the Skibicki case in my podcasts on Rumble and your name came up as being involved in the case and as a part of my research, i watched a few of your videos and subscribed because i really enjoy your content! keep up the good work and never give up
I’m currently experiencing toxic masculinity from a male whom I thought was my friend. He is suffering delusions and is very psychologically unstable. Being abused and shouted at publicly by someone mentally unstable who uses standover tactics is frightening. There were warning signs that he had a big problem - believing he had won expensive cars, houses; buying big items that never turn up but keep coming tomorrow, this week, next week for months…threatening other people, heavy harassment and even threatening to put his dog on people. I turned a blind eye to the behaviour and now it’s turned on me for no reason other than something perceived by the individual that lacks any reality…and it’s heavy!
Is this a lack of testosterone or too much testosterone?
A thought provoking explanation of toxic masculinity which I can relate to as a generation X. I also can imagine how volatile and claustrophobic the atmosphere was when you worked in the therapeutic community.
My ex was a "tough guy" that had old fashioned views on womens roles and behaviour. As I got older society views and mine changed. However I did feel protected by his perceived strength. One day our son's nursery dressed the boys up as girls. They wore dresses and carried out play role reversal cooking and cleaning tasks. The cooking and cleaning tasks were fine but I wasn't so sure about the dressing up as it seemed forced and not normal play that he initiated himself.
If you watch carefully, That T-Rex is moving closer and closer. It wants to eat those flowers.
That would explain the trail of destruction in my living room
@@APsychForSoreMinds The Doctor upvoted my comment! Senpai noticed me!
Thanks ominous Shamanic
The politics of the social sciences have become so intrenched with politics that toxic femininity can never be attended. In fact, it seems as if there is a presupposition that femininity is intrinsically better than masculinity. This says all that needs to be said. There is a time to laugh and a time to cry. The Greeks would be laughing at us.
Idk bro I dont really think much about this stuff its just not that big of a deal. Idk where all these toxic femininity are Ive only ever met one and she wasn't well liked most places she went.
@@Epic-so3ek Sure, but the entire "toxic masculinity" idea is predicated on aggression and (basically) lack of emotional intelligence. It's absurd to link only these traits to masculinity. It's also against the rules to link toxicity toward females who have these same traits. Why? And why is that those who open the discussion of toxic masculinity can never talk of the benefits of stoicism or even warranted aggression? Why are they also typically aggressive in demanding you take their side? It's all just a bunch of political silliness that can't withstand its own philosophical and psychological weight.
You have no idea what toxic masculinity is until you work with Texas cops😂
Wdym heros in blue? Theyre such good people??
Can you do a video on mental health tribunals
Which secure unit did you work in?
Please ignore & don't share my crappy comments. 😢
@Dr.Das: How would you call it, if a single mother tought her son(s) to surpress their emotions, to be dominant and "if necessary" aggressive towards others, to discourage seeking help and also tought them racist, homophobic and sexist bullshit? Would the mom also be "toxicly masculine" or would she be "toxicly feminine"?
Since you didn't get a reply, I'll try to answer.
She's neither. The son isn't "toxicly masculine" either. This is not how the term is used. Mother and son may engage in the promotion of toxic masculinity but it doesn't necessarily mean that they are toxic themselves.
And clearly, women can very often be complicit in the spreading of toxic masculinity. Women too live in a male-dominated world and they are (perhaps sadly) often well adapted to it. So in that vein a woman may encourage her son to conform to unhealthy masculine stereotypes, even if it goes against his own character and mental wellbeing, because she believes that he has better chances of being successful in life and in society if he "mans up". Or a woman may reject a (potential) partner because he dares to show vulnerability, which she may think is indicative of weakness and therefore unmanly. Et cetera.
In short, the mentality and ideology of toxic masculinity doesn't necessarily only exist in men.
Toxic femininity would be the situation where women are pressured or forced to conform to stereotypes of femininity. Be cute, be submissive, be helpless/dependent, don't dream of getting an education because you'll be a mum anyway, that sort of thing. Not surprisingly toxic masculinity usually goes hand-in-hand with toxic femininity. What they have in common is the toxicity, and a strong emphasis on inflexible, essential gender differences. It limits people in the way they can express their own selves outside idealised prescibed roles.
I believe that toxic masculinity is often seen as the greater problem because of the potential for violence. It's a very oppressive phenomenon. Toxic femininity on the other hand may just seem sad. But think of them both as manifestations of the same problem: gender essentialism within the context of a patriarchal (male-dominated) society.
I hope that makes sense to you.
I don’t believe in toxic masculinity, there’s just toxic behaviour for both sexes and it does differ in strategy but no that much
Came here to say exactly this.
No one gives a shit if you believe in it or not; it’s a real thing.
But there is a stereotype of overt masculinity in society, and there is an exaggerated and contorted version of it where, for instance, men act like it's gay to even care about each other. There are women that overdo the female stereotypes, pretending to be more helpless than they are, overreacting, unaccountability, stuff like that. I think it's more about parenting, like forcing your kid to "man up" if he doesn't fit the stereotype.
If you teach young men or boys you know exactly what toxic masculinity is and how damaging it is to everything, especially pencils!
If there's a toxic masculinity without toxic feminity then it's just political
Depends what you consider toxic, if it's domestic violence, r-pe and other forms of abusive behaviour- then these are way more frequent in men, than women, not exclusively, of course, but more common.
I think you've misunderstood the term. Toxic masculinity is where the typical values associated with being a man are exaggerated to a point where they become harmful. It is not simply another term for someone acting like a jerk. Now, I'm not an expert on "toxic femininity", but I guess it would be the same thing, where the typical values around being a woman are exaggerated to a point where they're harmful. An example could be a woman who is so obsessed with being beautiful or fashionable that it harms her mental health - perhaps she is abusive to other woman who she thinks doesn't meet the "correct" beauty standards, or becomes addicted to plastic surgery in the search for the "perfect body".