Why Not Being Afraid Of Losing Him Is Smart & Super Attractive
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.พ. 2022
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"Never be afraid of losing him. Be afraid of losing yourself."
"Self-respect is like an aphrodisiac to good men."
"You are a gift to the right man."
Amazing! So helpful! I will remember these!
well said
Correct. Bad guys hate it women respect themselves. Coz they can't use them.
@@freshdumpling right but what good is it to comply with someone who uses you without giving back? All I give comes back to me tenfold. that is true love. Some men use women because they see them as needy and demanding, even when they are not. So they take from the woman and feel entitled, as self-protection, so twisted. The man who truly loves a woman knows she givesas much as he does and they are equal partners in need and in giving
Your so right indeed
Never be afraid of losing him, be afraid of losing YOURSELF! This is so key to keeping balance and healthy dynamics in a relationship. All your videos are so good. ❤️
Yesss! Don’t lose YOURSELF trying to be with another individual. Period
💯💯
Thank you Brian, I needed to hear this. I nearly lost myself trying hard to save a relationship I had so much hope for, and recently chose to walk away from it. I had to give myself a reality check, remind myself I was the only one trying to save it and in the process was overlooking my own needs. His indifference was impacting my vision of who I am, my self worth. I never should have allowed this and SHOULD have been more attentive to my needs. Taking care of ourselves, our entire person... emotional, mental, physical ect, is a responsibility that cannot be overlooked, essential for happiness.
As painful as leaving has been, I remind myself how unhappy I would be IN the relationship. Watching your video's are truly an awakening to the essentials in relationships and happiness. Thank you for all of your work and dedication, your truly making a difference to each life your video's touch.
So true. I like what you wrote
Yes indeed
"The way a person treats us is the way that person feels about us"❤️
This line stood out for me, too. It's the absolute truth.
Exactly. When a woman treat a man like she doesnt need/want him the man will think that she doesnt care. So he will probably walk away. She cant expect him to beg or to keep waiting around.
So if u care about someone just show them that u care, u dont have to lose yourself because of it. If that person doesnt reciprocate then it means they dont care, so you can walk away and move on.
This is the truth. In my first marriage he was toxic and abusive. No amount of me becoming his doormat ever worked. I left him in 2016 after studying human behavior and psychology. I found self-worth and self-respect. I kept working on myself for 5 years single. Started dating a man and realized he was not going to be what I needed him to be. So I set some healthy boundaries. I was so in love with him, so attracted, but I knew that road, and didn't want to go down it again. So, I chose self-respect and carried on with my life. Then last July I ran into the one that got away twenty years ago. He just proposed on the 26th at our favorite space. He is so different, a good man.
The times I've had to set a boundary or tell him he violated one went so well. He did look at me differently, in a good way. One example is when he said, "You're worthy of all of that". I replied, "I know I am, or I would not have asked." He said, "See, that's why people are intimidated by you. You are intelligent and know your worth." Trust Brian, ladies. He is not lying to you. Stop chasing these half-ass men.
Congrats!! What all self work did u cover in 5yrs? Pls share d crucial key of ur learning.
Yes please share you work over 5 years!
You are awesome 👌 👏
God bless u am dating a pilot for 6yrs now he is not working am working with little wealthy I told him we should get married he said no till he got job I am going to get married so sooner
I'm deeply in love with a man I put boundaries up with 6 years ago. We just ran into each other again recently and he's growing up a lot but he has said things that show me hes still not ready for a real relationship with ANYONE. I don't honestly know if he's in love with me. Before I said farewell to him , again, tho, he did tell me that he knows how great I am. Either way thanks for sharing your story because I don't know if I'll ever stop loving him and I'm hoping if he does ever become ready for something real than maybe we will end up together one day. Even if that's many many years from now. Congratulations on your marriage. HAPPY for you
Feelings are often wrong.
The way a person *treats* us is how they feel about us. You are a gift to the right man!
Actions speak louder than words. And his indecision is a decision.
When he disrespected me and I stood my ground.. he did not respect me more..he accused me of being easily offended and he was being restricted!
That's toxic narcissist for you!
Same here!!
Yes...exactly....
God help us
And the scary part is- once you can spot one like that, you realize how many of them are out there.
I'd rather be single for the rest of my life than be around people that disrespect me. I'm content on my own anyway... I don't have to answer to anyone or ask permission to go out... and I can be myself when I'm alone without being judged.
I need this
Same. Boat here.
Totally agree!
Same boat.
Im with you 💯
“Self-respect is like an aphrodisiac to good men.” Spot on!
And is kryptonite to the wrong and toxic ones
Yes to good men , the wrong man will not like it and walk away. We win each time because the wrong guy is not worth it and the good guy is .
"Be afraid of losing yourself." 💯💯
If he's such a great guy to not want to lose him, he's not going anywhere anyway. So true amd I needed to be reminded of that. Thank you!
After spending 5 months i asked my ex what are we doing he replied i want what we have now for the moment,i cant give more so that day i said goodbye.
It’s NOT about games as you’re saying it’s about self respect…in ALL relationships people are attracted to those with self respect who don’t tolerate any BS
That’s because that’s what you do when you love people-you’re afraid to lose them.
The games are ridiculous. It’s stupid to pretend like we don’t care when we do. It’s also ridiculous that we expect men to drop everything for a woman, but the reverse is seen as us being “desperate”.
I’m not saying we shouldn’t have a standard for how we want to be treated. Every person should have these. But to pretend like we don’t love them is lying to them and lying to ourselves. We can say “I love you, and I don’t want to lose you, but this is what I want. I’d like you to be the person that gives me what I want, but if you don’t, I will walk away with a hurt heart, but I will move forward.”
Relationships shouldn’t be a power struggle, and anyone who tries to have power over you is not a person that you should be with. Love lays down weapons. Love is mutually reciprocated.
Beautiful and I agree! I read your comment several times.
Why must we make it so difficult 😫, most of the time?
If you lose him the relationship wasn't meant to last forever because not all relationships are meant to last.
Its not difficult. Just dont be in a relationship with a man you love with all of your heart. It usually never works bcz chances are, he dont love you as much and will want to find someone he will love that much
I don't understand why people are so scared of hearing the truth about how someone feels. I would LOVE to hear that someone admires me and finds me attractive. Ugh. Smh.
Love lays down weapons- I love that
If he really loves and cares for you, he will never make you feel afraid of losing him or make you wonder if he is still interested in you. Remember to always find a man who is into you more than you are him, then you will never have doubts about him
I don’t agree with the whole ‘find someone who is more into you than you in them.’ I think that’s advice coming from hurt. It should be mutual where both people give the same energy. Love is mutual. I’ve seen people in relationships like that and while it feels safer, it can also lack deep love when it isn’t balanced.
I don’t agree with it either although I used too. A woman can still show a man love but she must remain confident intelligent, and not make the guy/the relationship her entire life. The man of course must be the one who initiates it.
@@georgialee6755 I agree with this!
You don't want that either.
I love staying until the end, he always says thank you for staying and for some reason I feel super special when he does that.
He is using psychology. He thanks us so we will watch till the end. We get "hooked" on him appreciating us. He knows what he's doing.
I’ve just told the guy of my dreams (literally the it guy I’ve known since school I’m now 44!) that his communication isn’t good enough and it’s not working out for me. It felt Sssooo powerful!!
you can't make a man love you if he doesn't. if you can talk him into it, you didn't get a man, you got a child who will expect you to carry leadership through the rest of the relationship. I am delighted with the silences between my man and me. They mean he is living his life apart from my desire for attention, which is not all that his life is about. Nobody wants to have a lover tugging on them all the time like an insistent toddler or a puppy, fearful and jealous. Possessiveness is never attractive. If he has professed to be interested in no one but you, it insults him for you to suspect infidelity, and you owe him an apology for listening to your own insecurities instead of him. He should not have to spend his time with you defending himself against things that are not even happening. Have a little faith in him. He deserves that. If you can't get control of your own insecurities, seek counseling, because you are not mature enough for a serious relationship yet.
Very true..my man did profess to be interested in no one else but me..but hey..People lie, cheat and manipulate..I believed him until I caught him hiding and being sneaky and on a dating app..he didn't know I saw him and acted all flustered and shut his phone down immediately..he denies it..but I saw it with my own eyes he was on a messaging app..
So yes..sometimes is not insecurities..it's liars telling lies!
@@EcoworksFL Thanks for sharing. Oh my dear woman I am so sorry for what you are going through. My fiance in the 70s had been sleeping with our friends and anyone else who would let him, for four years before I caught him. By then he was not trying to hide it any more. It was over when one of his friends had his baby. Still he kept coming back to me as kind of security blanket I guess. he knew I was sincere but my love was not enough for him. He never knew it but I was a basket case when it was finally over.
Pamela, good woman, decide if you want to keep the relationship and then if you leave don't look back no matter what he says. We have to set the bottom line when it comes to commitment and it sounds like he is not ready for that with you, so it may be better to move on.
If you decide to forgive him you need to prepare for it repeating. These things tell you more about him than about you. A very strong self-esteem can endure a weakness in the partner but you cannot let it devastate you every time. One has to say, he is my cheater, and I'm keeping him, and defend your heart against all negative emotions about his behavior and stop obsessing about it.
You deserve faithfulness but you can't put something into him by demanding it. If you forgive, don't let it destroy you. From a position of strength you may chose to live beneath your privilege to have a faithful partner. Millions of women have chosen that. You are in good company if you stay, and stay strong. Don't let his behavior define your value in your own eyes. You will change how you feel about it before you change him. Be on guard against false hopes.
Men learn self-control like we do, sometimes by backing away from pain that results from bad choices. If you can be there for him when he sees your true love, you may have a better future but you can't look back. Forgive and forget and rebuild your relationship, starting over, determined not to reference the past. It is possible, but will you make that happen? It is up to you, dear lady. Circumstances don't define your life or your value--you do.
Either choice can be the right one. Life and love will be what you make them.
May God give you peace as you make your way back to freedom with a good expectation for a good man, sincerely ready to love only you, in the future, if that is what you choose. May he give you power every day to love as he loves without making demands if that is what you choose. I will be praying for you both.
@@EcoworksFL so sorry your man gave in to infidelity. I once had a fiance who didn't talk much and four years later had stopped trying to conceal that he had slept with our best friends and anyone else who would let him. Being fair to him he had deep insecurities he was trying to fill up with the affirmation he got from sexual conquest. It was not something that any one's true love could fix. When I gave up and moved on I was a basket case and could not even speak. It is just a fact that no matter how sincere and strong your love is, there is no guarantee you'll get it back from the one you love.
You have two options. Forgive him and learn to cope with repeat offenses, as in "he's my cheater and I am holding on" or break away and move on. Chances of your finding a man who does not explore many options even after making a commitment may be slim. It may be a long wait before you find true love. I waited 40 years. I will pray for you my dear, and for him to come to his senses, repent, and become worthy of your trust
Yes but so many men do lie and manipulate
@@asociacionmexicanacontrade3209 my man is not many men. he isnot what he used to be, women can be false, somemen are false thinking they will do first what they expect will be done to them, it is sad. find a true heart and it will not contain the wicked games
This phenomenon works opposite on women. If you are in relationship with a woman and you don't show interest in her, don't show interest when she talks to you, if your behaviour isn't respectful and you're trying to make her feel you're not interested just to ensure that she becomes more interested in you, sorry man but she will find someone who values her time and herself and you'll end up losing her. Relationships don't work on natural laws and tricks, there should be mutual love and understanding. If you ain't got no idea of abc of love don't try to force your partner to stay with you, set them free and if you are meant to be together love will find it's way. Just remember it's not a game that you should win it's their heart you might lose if you try to mould them 💜
This is one of your best. Really excellent. This actually helped me a lot, because you're right, why on earth should I be fighting for someone who isn't interested in me! That is kinda bananas, but the "prove myself" cycle is natural I suppose?...It's funny, I thought for awhile. "he's just shy or avoidant" - until I saw him march boldly across the parking lot to talk to a pretty girl he actually likes...so no, he just didn't like me haha!
Thank you. You teach me how to be a high value woman who dont chase and crave attention. So now, i know what to do..
Thank you! ❤️ I was recently called ignorant by the guy I’m seeing. He is not one to apologize. I was recently reminded that I am who God says I am and keep that in mind anytime I hear a negative comment about myself. He needs counseling but says he will never change. My opinion is that you change for the people you love. I do not know what the future holds but I know God has a plan for my life.
Insults are never ok. You deserve better
@@Eg-jd9zt Thank you! My sister has told me the same.
I had that too...and it doesn't get better.. it just gets worse..that's the first sign of abusive behaviour
It will not get better
It will get worse
I am more afraid of the drawn-out pain of the cycle in a toxic relationship than I am of never seeing that person again.. I have a rip it off like a Band-Aid motto. Rip it off fast get the pain over with and it will spare you more pain in the long run.
Exactly!!!
Tried fixing my imbalance, but there was no effort on his end,and when I tried to talk to him I was verbally abused and blamed so after yrs of waiting to find time for me which was non existence I broke it off. Doing good on my own.
I've been stucked in a very difficult situation of my five years old relationship... He is taking space for a very long time and the more I try to convince the more he pulls himself away... Idk what to do anyway watching your videos for a few days and I don't know how much do I can really implement your words but I find peace and energy while watching you in the videos... You bring positive vibes I wish I could have you near to share all my stories and my heart out which is not possible in this life but whatever just wanna send love from India... 💗💗💗
I wasn't even interested in him initially. But when he was persistent and pulled away after leading me on... i had invested in him emotionally. N now wht should i do? It HURTS badly !!!!
Its a mind game. Put ur mind on something / someone else. Best focus ur mind on doing things that benefit/ pamper u.
No matter how much it hurt...work on yourself....remember always be scared of losing urself.
ohhhh that style of guyyysss realllly sucks!!!! been there and the only thing you need to do to stop it is to not entertain his mind games...really...and seriously.
I rekindled with my long term long distance ex. We broke up 2 years ago cuz he couldn't come see me and he found someone there. But this year he came to my country, we saw each other and I fell for it again. I thought this time it'll be different. I took care of him vuz his dad passed. But before going back to the states he told me that he had a gf there and that he'd go break up with her and come back do right by me. I was shattered but at that point I agreed cuz I was emotionally so invested. Now that he's back in the states, he doesn't contact me as often and he's delaying his break up. I finally messaged him and told him to only hit me up when he's single. He read my message but didn't respond.
I was such a fool to have thought that he really loved me, that he truly wanted to be with me. Now I'm realising that I was probably just an emotional support for him and he never loved me to begin with. This breaks my heart that I'm back to square one
@holdingontothelaststraw byee: I've been there too. Mine only lived one hour away, but he might as well have been in another country. It's difficult, as us women that have big Hearts, we long for love and long to trust. Men with complex lives, go for convenience, who is closer and 'looks good on paper,' not always where their Heart leads them. You know his patterns, you'll break them down and realise what is right for you. All the best.
Block and delete him.
I feel you! I just wasted 20 years on and off please when I'm behind you and don't put yourself where I'm at. The sooner you know they're not the one the better trust me and God's blessings to you
Part of the secret is don’t long for love. You most likely won’t find it. Instead be confident intelligent and feminine - don’t put all your thoughts in finding love. Hard yes
Maybie because hes not rally intrested, and then, hes nothing important to waste your time with. Whatever effort you put in to try to regain his attention tells you how easily someone else will do the same.
Dont worry, hes nothing to loose your mind over.
I love this. I always said this. As I grew up it’s not about not not caring that you’re going to lose them it’s just at the end of the day life keeps on going. We shouldn’t stop because one person gets offended by us not wanting them. But also some people are insecure because we are like this and choose to be mean from this way of thinking.
Thank you, Geert for your priceless information. Short and to the point. It would be great to have at least one weekly video from you!
Needed exactly this today! 🙌🏼
Never fight for his attention
I agree with the law of pining. I work at an online store and we restrict female customers for various reasons. They go absolutely bonkers trying to buy when they are not allowed to, it's a lot of fun to watch. The more you tell them NO , you can't have it, the more they want it
Brian is second to none!, Thanks Brian ❤️
Oh Brian you are a Very Wise Man!
I Love listening to your posts!
Great talk Brian ,self respect is attractive 💯
Conclusion concluded the best-est and succinct and concise. Lovely talk!
Your voice is so soothing. I could listen to you all day.
This is pure gold ! Thank you Heath 💗
Thank you for this useful advices. I have noted this down: doing what's best for you regardless of your emotions. Easier than said but i will try.
Brian, you are the sun that brightens my day. Thanks so much for your advice. It always comes in handy. Phew! 😅
Brian, I really needed this Right Now!
Thank you ❤️
Always bringing so much value to the dating scene. Learned so much from you.
Thanks 🙏🏼
Enjoyed the video, thanks! Self respect is attractive to the right man, indeed. Hoping to see more of you ❤
I'm saving this video in my playlist "wisdom"!
You are "wonderful". If ever an advice was on point, this was it! Thank you for your time and effort H. 🤗💚😎🌴
I really needed this today. Wow. Thank you.
Thank you I couldn't remember how many times I watched this lols. I keep listening repeatedly and this is an eye-opener for me
He won't get off his dating app n don't want a relationship bc his ex wife fked him up. Whatever the reason...not on my time ..be unavailable on your own time. I deserve better. Brian you are awesome.
@Soul on Fire - yep, similar excuse I've endured. I'm not like his ex, I'm completely different, but his life is too messy and he is at a loss of how to deal with it, so he doesn't. It makes me sad that he's like a 'headless chicken.'
@@anitarogers7012 girl run from confused men. They will drag you down for years. I wasted 3.5 years with an ex who was a commitment phobe... I've taught myself to recognize these types of me as they are time wasters.
Wow!!! Thank u Brian!! This video just helped me feel so much better!! I realised I am a gift 🎁 & should be cherished like a 9 year old would. So much sense!! Sending u much love & thanks!! Best wishes & keep up the great work!!🙌🏽👏🏼
Thank you for sharing your wisdom and encouragement.
You are Awesome Brian ! 💗💝🤍🤗
Brian, i've read all of your books) please, write some MORE))) and thank you for your advice! which helped me move on and get rid of soooo wrong relatioship
Thank you! I needed to be reminded. Perfect timing for this video to be suggested.
I own your book and I absolutely love your content! Thank you for giving so much empowering info!!! 🥰🥰🥰
I thank God to have found ur channel, is really helping me to move on with my life.
Thank you Brian... needed to hear this ❤️
So true. I desperatly needed to hear this. Thank you for advice.
*True,* try it out: Self-respect is more important than having one specific person in your life. Self-respect = priority 1 = brings you respect and is highly attractive.
You find a whole new world😉 if you follow this advice, promise.
Hi Brian, I had to say your talk is not just so helpful, but so funny I had to laugh out loud 🤣 I enjoy it so much, thank you so much for making these videos!!!
You're so good at putting things into clear perspective. Thanks for this video and for great advice, Brian :)
...exactly how it is/was...wish I'd known this before...would have left much earlier. Thank you for explaining this so well 🙏🏻❤️👍🏼
Absolutely amazing video Brian! Always love your great advice :)
Thank you so much Hearth for this video... Your insight and advise here are invaluable 🙏
Great advice again, thank you so much Brian
Great watch Brian . Always enjoy all your advice. Just now need to learn to act on it .
Such a Amazing video....thanks a lot Brian...lots of love💕
I needed to see this video. Thank you so much.
You explain these things with sensitivity and kindness. I thank you. Sometimes it's hard to be single and looking.
I use to be scared of loosing someone until they continue to make the same lie and wreck less behaviors continuously having to hide who they hangout and whereabouts, who has time for that really, I ride along in hope they will change but I was a wrong move. You can’t keep anyone who don’t wanna be kept.
This is such great advice! Thank you so much!
OMG! Best advice ever!! I hope many women see this video. THANK YOU!
You are the BEST! This made me laugh so hard at the beginning. You're videos are so helpful.
This video was absolutely amazing.
These advises are precious. Thank you
One of the best and most useful videos I’ve seen for a long time. Thanks!!! 😊
Your amazing my brother...thank you for your wisdom..x 🙏🏽😘
Thank you Geert ❤️
Gold ! I need to hear that 100 times!
Your videos are so lovely abs they changed my perspective on relationships..Thank you Brian Nox
Great video. Thanks Brian.❤️
What a great advice and so motivating. Thanks Brian love your videos
Thanks for the heads up Brian
Great advice. Thanks, Brian.
We are a gift to the right person. 🎉
Wow. What an awesome video. Thank you 😊
The timing of this🔥.
Thank you Brian. I love your videos alot......🙏
Great video, thank you xx
Hello Brian, this video was OUTSTANDING. I need to listen to it everyday for quite a while. A ton of nuggets.++++
thanks for this!!
You are so smart! Thank you 💗 so much.
You are awesome ! Thank you very much!
Thank you, I get a lot out of every video!
Brian, you are great! Thank you !
Wow. Very well said. I learned a Lot 👍thank you so much. For the great advice as always.
You’re amazing!
literally the exact video i needed to hear.
This is sooooo true!!
Always love yourself more
Very well said!