Interestingly, my DA was attracted by my logical and confident self, which now he thinks is critical and confrontational. I still stand to what I believe and that triggering him.
Wow! Number 3 is super helpful for me right now. There have been a couple of things I’ve wanted to bring up to my DA girlfriend but I wasn’t sure how to do it. I actually just tonight (Friday) told her I was sensing that she was not ready to talk about us going to the gym together tomorrow (which we’d discussed a few weeks ago when she offered to join me - I’d been planning to go by myself - and she is now avoiding the topic) and I told her it’s totally okay. I’m happy to go on my own. But she didn’t respond tonight when I asked if she wanted to join me tomorrow so I said I was happy to give her some space and if I didn’t hear from her I hoped she had a nice weekend. So I’ll wait a few days and bring it up again. Honestly if she avoids it next time, I won’t bring it up again because it’s not that big a deal to me. I’m perfectly happy to go by myself and that was my plan all along until she offered to join me. But strategy number 3 will be very useful when I ask her to talk about her feelings about something important I’ve been wanting to understand about her better. Thanks for letting me know how to do this. More videos on this would be much appreciated! Thank you!! 🙏 ❤
@hfortenberry I am so glad you are finding these videos helpful. I hope you are your girlfriend continue to connect in a more fulfilling way for both of you. :) Sounds like you are doing great.
It is important to note: If the avoidant is reactive (particularly the last one), it is a sign trust and rapport still need to be built. These techniques are more likely to be received well with avoidants who trust their partners and/or long-term relationships/situations. Overall, being more direct will help the avoidant to gain respect towards the partner.
Could you explain if the core wound of an avoidant is specific to the individual, or is it general among the attachment style, or both? Also do you have contact information for private counseling? Also, how do we the subscribers address you as there is no name or title associated with your channel. I appreciate your professionalism and calm in discussing these matters. Please make more content as you are a rara avis (Latin).
Hello there. I can make a video about core wounds to each insecure attachment style, at some point. As for my practice information or my name, I would like to keep that private for now :) Thank you for appreciating my videos. All I really want is to help people. :)
Excellent
Interestingly, my DA was attracted by my logical and confident self, which now he thinks is critical and confrontational. I still stand to what I believe and that triggering him.
I think you articulated this beautifully. Love this kind of content, excited to see more :)
Wow! Number 3 is super helpful for me right now. There have been a couple of things I’ve wanted to bring up to my DA girlfriend but I wasn’t sure how to do it. I actually just tonight (Friday) told her I was sensing that she was not ready to talk about us going to the gym together tomorrow (which we’d discussed a few weeks ago when she offered to join me - I’d been planning to go by myself - and she is now avoiding the topic) and I told her it’s totally okay. I’m happy to go on my own. But she didn’t respond tonight when I asked if she wanted to join me tomorrow so I said I was happy to give her some space and if I didn’t hear from her I hoped she had a nice weekend.
So I’ll wait a few days and bring it up again. Honestly if she avoids it next time, I won’t bring it up again because it’s not that big a deal to me. I’m perfectly happy to go by myself and that was my plan all along until she offered to join me. But strategy number 3 will be very useful when I ask her to talk about her feelings about something important I’ve been wanting to understand about her better. Thanks for letting me know how to do this. More videos on this would be much appreciated! Thank you!! 🙏 ❤
@hfortenberry I am so glad you are finding these videos helpful. I hope you are your girlfriend continue to connect in a more fulfilling way for both of you. :) Sounds like you are doing great.
@ Thank you. But I feel like the blind leading the blind. 😂 😭 I think we will make it though. I hope. 🙏💗
Thank you for sharing your thoughts
It is important to note: If the avoidant is reactive (particularly the last one), it is a sign trust and rapport still need to be built. These techniques are more likely to be received well with avoidants who trust their partners and/or long-term relationships/situations. Overall, being more direct will help the avoidant to gain respect towards the partner.
Could you explain if the core wound of an avoidant is specific to the individual, or is it general among the attachment style, or both?
Also do you have contact information for private counseling?
Also, how do we the subscribers address you as there is no name or title associated with your channel.
I appreciate your professionalism and calm in discussing these matters. Please make more content as you are a rara avis (Latin).
Hello there. I can make a video about core wounds to each insecure attachment style, at some point. As for my practice information or my name, I would like to keep that private for now :) Thank you for appreciating my videos. All I really want is to help people. :)
Came here for private therapy as well. Amazing content!
Please pour more in to help us understand our DA partners, particularly husband. Thank you.
@ Will do :)