A good thing is,we call a human traits a syndromes...not a pathology anymore All I can see,imposter, narcissism are the hottest topics now..... So ,we are in a process of realising what we really are, that's good.The problem is we are blaming each others for something which is our own characteristics.. That's a thing to overcome.....and we will be fine. But not with religion around.....
@@marcinzadora2050 If You Truly Believe That Pure Religion Is The Primary Source Of The World's Woes, Then It Is My Opinion That You Are Perhaps Sincerely Mistaken.
Chris, you do very good interviews. I didnt know that i needed to hear this 8 minutes talk, but i did need it. Thank you. And thanks to professor Peterson.
Impostor syndrome isn’t about comparing yourself to other, it’s more like comparing actual yourself to the Idealistic fantasy version of you that you hold in your head.
Not necessarily. You can feel that way in a new job or in any place where you don't know what to do. It's not tied only to yourself but what you perceive to be whatever role you are trying to fill in. Like not fitting in your father's shoes but on a more realistic scale because the idealistic fantasy version of you comes from yourself. The ideal characteristics of something outside of yourself, like a job, a role, is both an ideal coming from your own mind but also shaped by the beliefs of others. Which isn't to say that your idealistic version of yourself isn't shaped by others but it is more... of a consensus I would say.
Comparing? I'd assume it would be more like pretending. Comparing yourself to your ideal self just seems like ambition. When you pretend to be a better person, wich you want to be but you aren't, then you will have cognitive dissonance.
I just started a new role in the company I work for, and everything they talked about is true with me. I am going to take the advice and dive head-first into things I don't understand and am scared of. Thank, Professor Peterson.
Congratulations on the new position! I would like to give you some actionable advice that is very easy to implement that iwas given in the same situation.Helped me immensely to not only navigate well but actually rise faster than I would have and avoid a lot of embarrassment and problems 1.have a centralized place where you keep notes. 2.Every time throughout the day and especially at the end of each work day write down everything that you are unsure about. 3. Anything that caused you angst or that felt you needed to know further. 4. Set aside some time each week to research those items further. Actually did it three days during the week. 5. Put them in a word document with a hashtag related to the subject. This will help you not have to ask the same questions multiple times and you'll have your own searchable database when other things come up in the future. You will also show growth a lot faster which will impress your peers and superiors I was in a position where somebody got very ill and I got promoted to a role that I was clearly not prepared for. This advice was given to me and it changed the entire experience it went from being a stressful situation that probably would have took a long time for me to reach parity with my peers to within 6 months, I was actually elevated a second time it's a really good method. Good luck on the new job!!!
I'll warn you now that if you're actively listening and asking constant questions, the envious and the incompetent will construe it as ineptitude whether they actually believe that or not. But my advice, based on my own career, is to ignore the haters and bulldoze through with your questions until you feel sufficient mastery of your responsibilities regardless of any snide comments or gestures people make. Once you're on your feet and you transition from a walk to a sprint, your competence and necessity will become apparent to all, even if the envious refuse to admit it and sneer at you forever. If I was a manager, I would take super careful note of those who do that and find any excuse to oust them, but as we all know most managers only become managers by being conniving themselves.
The more severe your worries and preoccupations the less mental CPU time you have to spare for noticing things other people might find blindingly obvious. I was consistently surprised by positive reactions toward me because I had convinced myself that I was a pathetic loser. This consistency didn't clue me in though. I was lost in a turbid stormy ocean of feeling like I was just clinging on to the rollercoaster of life. I still get lost annoyingly frequently, but getting clarity from external sources like this helps me come up for air. And helps me erode the beliefs I had/have in my mind's bullshit explanations.
Wow. That was a slap in the face. This describes me to a t. I'm living in a great neighborhood, all the stuff, two great kids, great income etc but I feel like I'm a big loser and just barely hanging on, like the rug is going to be pulled out from under me any moment.
This actually reminds me of Napoleon. In 1796, Napoleon took over the Army of Italy. He was a young, rather inexperienced general, and was expected to hold the line in case the Austrians tried to push into France. What Napoleon did was something no other French general would do: he started asking questions of the French officers who were in Italy before he arrived. He asked them very simple questions, which revealed he has no clue how to do his job being an inexperienced general that he was. But he learned quickly and at the same time earned the respect of older, more experienced but lesser officers. He spoke even to engineers which was shocking because engineers were commoners, not nobles, but they knew how to build and destroy bridges and roads, knew how to get cannons to high hills from which their range could be increased. The young Napoleon asked everybody he could on everything they knew. He learned from common soldiers about the status of equipment and arms, wrote to Paris to make the Directorate send fresh supplies, gunpowder, etc.. Less than a month later, Napoleon launched a surprise attack on the Austrians and whipped their butts. This is how his legend began. By asking questions.
The humility required from a general to discuss subjects with different types of people from all backgrounds is the key quality here and is what Peterson and the other guy are trying to convey as the outshining quality above competence and intellect, or asking questions. Mind you those things are great, it’s necessary to remember what is important when possessing such things as competence and intelligence.
Are there any specific books or documentaries on Napoleon you'd recommend? There are many that talk about the big historical things he did, but I want to know more about things like this, admitting he was inexperienced and taking risks to learn from others
this hits so close to home, thanks jordan. imposter syndrome has ruined my life and made me feel like a delusional emotionally dysregulated actor and I don't have a sense of self. to know other people suffer of this just allows me to deal with this stuff rationally from now. love, jordan
Oh no Paulo Coelho the biggest charlatan of them all! hehe… my biased Brazilian opinion 😂 “we can only go as far as exactly one step further to where our competence stops!”
This was a good chat. 6 months ago I quit taking an antidepressant and an adhd drug because I want to pursue something that does not allow either one. I'd been taking the regimen for 6 years. It's been tough for the past 6 months, and I've had moments where I'm certain I need to get back on the medications, but I keep going and proving to myself that I can do my job and run my life generally well without the assistance. It has been a big struggle on some days, but still, we must forge onward, and win!
As an imposter, the imposter syndrome is quite helpful. It gaslights me into thinking I may also be overthinking it, and am actually doing nothing wrong.
I have some kind of imposter adaptation which has crippled me psychologically, and what I learned listening to this, the sense of being able to stare it down and overcome it gradually to turn it into something more manageable, the hope, the strength to grieve all the psychological pain that I've caused myself (acknowledging my own pain being one of my deficiencies), it's redemption and salvation for a life largely in ruins. So long and so hard I feel like I have strived to fight on and maybe manage to heal someday; catching a break like this is like having somewhere to warm up after being homeless in the cold so long I've forgotten what it's like to be indoors.
I dont even know what I have - Imposter syndrome, ADHD, or whatever else - all I know is that I relate to the pain of constantly feeling unsure of myself and alone in my thoughts, doubting everything I do, if people got the right intention behind my actions/words, and in general afraid of being misunderstood... Im actually tired, and have no wish to make sense of all that now. Either way, I hope I described why I liked your comment well enough. Hang in there.
With you guys on this. This clip has brought tears of recognition to my eyes... It's a tough, uphill trail and for me, the steps forward are tiny and slow. It's exactly the reassurance I needed to hear today. 🙏 So let's cut ourselves some slack and recognise that [7:18]: "it is harder for some people, because it takes more evidence for them to dampen down their response to threat". We are where we are, and can still aim, move forward with hope, humility and small, intentional steps.✌️
Thanks for having a discussion about Imposter Syndrome. I did not know about it prior to this but after listening to this discussion, I understand how it fits into my life
I believe that imposter syndrome is a means for the self to protect itself from ego. Because if you develop ego, you stop learning, if you’re insecure about some elements relating to your competence, then you’re in a space of creativity and ingenuity that requires growth & learning alongside it!
@@KO-im6sm We have a saying in Arabic (it's a religious one actually), that says: two kinds of people don't learn: the shy/insecure and the arrogant. What Eiman is pointing out is the (risk to be become) arrogant , you're pointing out the first kind. whenever someone is faced by these internal challenges, one question should be asked within ourselves: "do I want to learn?" , if the answer is yes, crush whatever feeling you have at that moment and ask, even if you know that the person in front of you won't be that benevolent and might even see you as stupid (some people are toxic but it should be their problem, not yours because you need an answer, our ego can wait) but the majority of people will be more than glad to help, either because of their genuine will to share info or to show themselves under the best spotlight and boost their own ego... in all cases, you'll win.
Personally, my imposter syndrome has been there all my adult life and I feel it's has been exacerbated by a very critical parent, my dyslexia and dysphagia (late diagnosis) and getting my degree in my 40s. I am a very determined person so even though I have this feeling I will continue regardless and hope it gets better.
There is a liberation in accepting not every step of the process is a fine art, as the blacksmith, sometimes you just have to beat something into submission before you can sharpen the blade.
It’s harder r we hen we have such problems I can advise standing your ground is good but when you don’t forgive move on and know it can happen will happen but in the end you will be strong enough _~reflection is good 👍
I have the same issues. Finally got my MBA last year. I work with people fresh out of school. Even thought I have many years of experience in other areas, including fields that support this role… I feel out of place. Best of luck to us.
I was getting the first massage I'd had in a long time and (I forget what she asked me regarding how teaching yoga was going) but I just felt the tears well up and sobbed, "I'm such a fraud." I understand now. I'd *just* started teaching and somehow in the relaxed state acknowledged I had a lot to learn. I'm glad JP said it wasn't a lie because feeling like a fraud felt so much worse than a lie. The good news is that I did overcome my fear of public speaking & people looking at me (instead of faking it) and, of course, gained more education in my trainings which allowed for more confidence.
that is great you overcame some of your struggles. I too have carried this fear of being looked which I think in essence is the fear of being judged negatively. Often we are way too hard on ourselves, I know I have been.
Imposter syndrome is such a strange one. As a musician I'm in a constant cycle of doubting my abilities, because I think that if I keep doubting myself, I will keep getting better. Which is 100% true - I am getting better. But when does it stabilise?
I think, from what he said, it should go away when you stop getting better. When you stop pushing forward. It seems to be an indication that you're in the right place. I think a change in the way we think about impostor syndrome is in order
It will be there throughout your journey. As long as you keep growing and exploring new aspects of your craft, imposter syndrome will be there. You adapt to it and recognize it as a sign you are stepping out of your comfort zone. Keep growing and learning!
@@ladetygr I think I may have cracked the code within the last six hours: house music. It's quite a different genre compared to what I usually do - I make alternative rock songs as a guitarist + vocalist. But over the last few years I've realised that I'm getting really sick of the genre, I seem to 'freeze up' and not enjoy myself. House music however, makes me feel free, it's like a breath of fresh air. What I'm now trying to do is combine the two somehow...
@@vOcHaZOv awesome!!! It's such an amazing experience when we delve into new or revisited territory that just feels right! I'm glad you have found a wave to ride that is sparking the creativity in you!!!
He is a true master of his arts. The wey he speaks hits hard, its really that type where everything around you goes silet just to listen because it really feels truly meaningful.
I feel the same...even if I fix computers on the daily a curveball comes that just destroys my confidence and self-steem...doesn't matter how much I learn I still go to work scared of everything that I don't know
I feel the imposter syndrom with everything I do. I always doubt the things I do and it keeps me from chasing after dreams and things I think would make my life way better. It's really hard.
2023, i have 3 demons in my head.....depression, anxiety crises and imposter syndrome for over 18 years....its horrible to deal with this because i cant do anything because everytime i have idea or start something knew i instantly think that somebody will do the samething better than me or i will never be a master at that thing just like those guys who does that thing for decades. Not only that, i discover today "the spolight effect" which i had side by side to imposter syndrome. i stopped dancing because people were actually judging me and making jokes about my style and this is not coming from my mind because i saw it happening and all of this bullshit situation going on with my mind started when my (stupid) father started to compare me to the others making those people look better than me and insulting me everytime i had a bad performance at school and wrong decisions......now i am here using the most powerful tool we have today to overcome those 3 demons because i dont have money to go to a professional person to help me.
For me this imposter syndrome came from my early childhood. Also probably assisted in my Neuroticism - 80th percentile I believe. Any error in school, bad test grade, report card etc. Was met with furious yelling from my father, including name calling insults etc. So at 9-14 I was pretty well aware that you should never make mistakes and you should never need help because that means you're stupid. Its been a hell of a ride trying to unlearn that.
Loving the content, man. Don't stop doing what you're doing. I would like to talk to you about translate your videos to PT-BR. I'm sure a lot of people here will love your content. 🇧🇷
It's amazing how you experience these things for yourself and feel that it's an obscure composite of emotions that only you are aware of. But then you watch a video with Jordan Peterson giving a very in depth analysis and understand your issue even more clearly.
Cool thing, I was very sensitive boy, more so than some girls, I moved out of my parents at 19 and went to a different country to study, in a year or so had a full on mental breakdown that lasted maybe a week, after I managed to calm myself down I became much more depressed/uicidal but I also got myself out of that and virtually no one knew about it, and at the end of all of it I became a completely different person. I'm The opposite of myself now, I have much more confidence but it's mostly because I lost the ability to care for anything really and empathy became a chore but I'm somewhat of a good person still. Sensitive people stay fragile if they don't encounter difficulties, but I'd personally recommend such drastic things as I have endured because I feel hollow and I feel almost nothing on a daily basis and it sometimes can be mildly uncomfortable. P.S. No one will read it and I'm speaking to myself, but I'm always, mentally, alone, so that's ok.
Good for you. Nobody cares about you. Once you figure that out, you don't have to care about anyone else's business. Live your own life for yourself. Make yourself happy.
If you now feel hollow and don’t care for anything really, you are depressed. You can care and feel empathy and then have friends, that must not make extremely vulnerable. Try to engage in other people and activities, that make you happy. And keep boundaries, you can care without other people hurt you.
It's so true , i am on a journey myself as im about to move out and to study in a new country at just 18 . I'm trying to get as much exposure as I can which I lack before in my school . So I'll take this advice and just dive into the stuff I fear the most
Same here. I have struggled with imposter syndrome my whole life but it comes alive when I am in a new situation or job. Unfortunately, I have doubts and questions but I feel like there is nobody to ask. I work in the field and everyone in the office is busy themselves.
The first time I came across this term was when I started writing a short fiction story. Though I lacked experience and knowledge of the main themes of the story, I still continued to write until the imposter syndrome started to get louder until I stopped writing. Felt guilty writing it and sometimes even guilty for stopping. It sucks having that voice that tells you you're way in over your head.
There is one huge mental trick I play on myself when I feel stress from work from some problems that I'm not yet competent enough to solve in spades. I just say to myself that I'm there VOLUNTARILY. Because that's true: I chose to work there, I chose this position, I chose this field of work. I could have chosen something else. By bringing this idea into my immediate field of consciousness I start to think of the problem as a challenge and myself as a hero. Needless to say I grow as a professional at an unprecedented rate.
Individuals who had a poor or abusive childhood/adolescence where they had few opportunities to really challenge and push themselves could become adults who suffer from imposter syndrome.
I somewhat disagree or maybe misunderstand your point. People with 'rough childhoods' can't handle challenge or adversity? I'd argue that those people who turn their life around and become successful must have already won the battle against their sense of worthlessness and can better cope then those that were pampered or sheltered throughout their childhood.
Not could ... ... does ... Being a survivor of not only serious childhood abuse, but also being doubted by my extended family of the extent of my - now late - mum's involvement in said abuse, especially towards my younger, severely disabled, sister, means although I _know_ how complicit my mum was, they (the wider family) would never believe me ... What truly hurts is being surrounded by those whom you would think will support you, especially when your dad is sent to prison for nine years, but never once wrote to me asking if I was OK ... I could go on, but, the point is, as they made me feel stupid, I always ended up doubting myself because, unfortunately, the way my life has been, has rarely ended up being surrounded by competent people ... Hence why I get how some men just up, and walk away, because when you're constantly surrounded by incompetence, and the rare occasion you've tried speaking truth to power, but got incinerated for it, eventually you reach a point of utter mental, emotional, and psychological exhaustion, that nothing worthwhile seems worth it anymore ... No wonder so many young men fall victim to the abyss, especially when it offers the most tempting thing of all: stillness, and silence ...
I don't believe in exposing yourself to something to get more confident at it, many singers reveal that they are a nervous wreck before concerts. It is a natural reaction to some type of underlying trauma/feeling/emotion/whatever. The key is to be vulnerable, be honest with yourself and the world and find that underlying issue. For many years I thought I had stage fright, until I realized I would talk in front of a lot of people without anxiety, it was then when I realized that my "stage fright" was actually only active in job related public speeches and the imposter syndrome was behind it. Born from low self esteem and insecurities. It told me, you're gonna fail and they're gonna see you're not who you say you are. To deal and eventually kill my imposter syndrome I had to work on my self esteem and my insecurities, accepting my vulnerability and the fact that I will never be perfect. Everything cracks under pressure. Don't put yourself under pressure
I like what Jordan said about the inevitability of someone who is not a narcissist to experience these waves of self-doubt when initially promoted. It is healthy to know that you are not at the professional level the first day on the job. I have experienced over-compensating leaders and I never wanted to be one, so I try to be transparent to a healthy degree when I need help or encouragement. But it is important to not STAY feeling like an imposter. Recognising others’ feelings about who you are and synthesising that with who you know you are internally helps create a well-rounded understanding of yourself. Watching a lot of Peterson, I recognise the importance of my self-reflection in conjunction with the lives of other people. In other words, the more I know myself, the more agreeable I become to others. The more agreeable and self-realising I am, the more I can respond appropriately to stimuli before I allow an initial reaction to gain control of a situation. Great clip
Can we all just imagine how vastly different this world would be if all the magnificent people with imposter syndrome had just believed in themselves. Where we would be as a species…
@@nitefawl the majority of people are women? So what. That has nothing to do with the op's post. If less men were desperate to get a woman there would be less imposter syndrome? I don't get it.
@@nitefawl "the original post was it was also redundant and irrelevant at best." Horseshit. Can I make an observation...you are possessed by an ideology. You analyzed a statement that had nothing to do with sex, by viewing it through an "ideological lens" which warped the said statement using a narrative that doesn't even remotely ring true when investigated to any depth. "It was not you who ate the idea, but the idea that ate you." Fyodor Dostoevsky
@@nitefawl but you're assuming that 100 percent of the women "believe in themselves" (whatever you actually mean by that, it's quite vague) when you say that, then there is the other problem: you are professing to "know" what these women think/feel. Dangerous slope.
Impostor syndrome is seen in a negative light. It certainly is hell for newbies but it also exists for experienced individuals. It is most likely also related to our inherent spirit of competition. You can have an idealistic view of yourself which you can never attain but that may be because you lack a role model you can try to reach and surpass. It's the same except that your idealistic version of yourself is imaginary.
for me I think it's pretty much normal to happen since ,whether we like it or not, a decent percentage for why we succeed has nothing to do with our hard work or skills rather it's due to luck or some divine work or whatever you want to phrase it
I started playing electric guitar as a young boy about 1967 or so. At 17, I was in a band, and we were starting to get good $$$ gigs. Of course I felt like an imposter... but at least, I thought, I am in a band with another guitarist who was widely regarded as the best in Oregon... perhaps even the tri-state area. So the imposter was able to feel some confidence that A) not as much is required of him, and B) this other guy could carry it all by himself if I imploded. In my early 20's this band was long gone. The imposter had to audition to get into another. The best club band in Portland was advertising for a lead guitarist. They had failed to find one in Portland auditions, so had come down to Eugene. This imposter went, and found he was like #16 to be interviewed and auditioned. All the other guys had big hair, leather jackets, and way nicer equipment than I did. The imposter rolled his Twin Reverb in, wearing a T shirt and jeans. After the audition ("we'll call you", yeah sure) I was crestfallen because of how very good they were. It would have been the best band I could ever hope to join. That night they called, and I got the gig. So, as Jordan says, you may BE an imposter along the way... but at some point, if you're determined, you become that guy instead. JMO
Practice building your ego. Not to an irrational level, but to a high level. Society teaches us to be little our selves, people who think highly of them selves , have a big ego , are much less likely to not have this imposter syndrome
Neuroticism is your cue, even if it deters and skews your awareness of it and everything else. It’s cunning and it’s purpose is to keep bias and drama alive at any cost. It has the ability to justify with incredible precision. Without true honesty nothing is possible. It’s a long journey but without this awareness, it’s very difficult to improve and move forward. It’s difficult even with it, but at least it offers you some evidence that it’s possible.
I started a data entry job at a large insurance company a few months ago, they needed someone right away and I was fairly qualified. But cus of how busy it was, training was very basic and some stuff they forgot to tell me. Like 'here is what you do, let me know when you're done, i will do the rest'. My knowledge of life insurance was very minimal. So I have to just keep bothering people about things, or they do things for me cus it's easier than teaching me. They say they rather I ask them, but I take pride in being knowledgeable, taking initiative and problem solving. I often feel dumb or that i really shouldn't be here.
What I got from this is Humility and Expressed Curiosness to competent people can solve imposter syndrome. Have the courage to be perceived as a fool. Also, Repititon - just keep going.
It seems to me, judging by the comments, people are getting it a bit wrong. Jordan in essence is tapping into the phenomenon from the paradigm of play - from the onset of your life, you adapt yourself to the environment by imitating the best available ideal who has the means of navigating the structure of the world. This, I think, is linked thereafter to every situation you find yourself in. You, as a beginner in any situation, unconsciously start to imitate the person most approximating the successful through their virtues, or rather, you try to embody the virtues and practice your behavior so as to best exemplify those characteristics that breed the most success in the given situation. This is not inherently a problem, I gauge, until your meta-realization of what you are exactly doing - attempting to bring yourself closer to that chosen ideal via mere imitation - which then breeds the feeling that you are not a sincere representation of the ideal, but that you've rather copied the person embodying the ideal. Which then assumably makes you ponder your own legitimacy in that matter, since you are made aware of the fact that your wisdom is not yours but second hand. But then, keeping with the play paradigm, that is exactly the right and correct means, acquisition, so long as you also then keep to the realization that you are not the prime authority in given circumstance and never sell yourself as the originator of the ideas and always have an incomplete knowledge corpus. That is what separates the honestly aspiring from the impostor fakes.
Everyone in some sense is attempting to approximate some best avaliable ideal, and as such, their knowledge and opinions acquired is never a portrayal of their own thoughts, that is, one's opinions is merely a linear combination of previously derived opinions of others. You are rarely creating, but rather combining. It is those who embody their derived opinions with the most truth and confidence that come across as sincere rather than as an imposter to others.
2:25 - Yeah, unfortunately, that's how i feel perpetually. I'm perpetually ignorant due to various circumstances and lack of proper education from both the school and parents. Every question I make is apparently stupid and rather than getting an answer i'm shamed for it by multiple people on multiple occasions. I have a million questions, that's how ignorant I am. I get that I have to change right, I have to become competent I have to gain knowledge but I just know that when I do, I will not look the same way at people who treat newbies like that. It creates resentment. And resentment is also "conquearable" but i found out that I do not tolerate intolerant people.
There’s that but there’s also the issue of doubting yourself even when you aren’t bad at it. Unfortunately, many people have the opposite problem of being over confident in their abilities and unwilling to examine themselves when they fall short.
He says people won't judge you if they are competent. Good luck finding those people. I can tell countless stories of starting new things and having the existing people just start screaming the second you don't know something. They are like wolves just waiting for you to screw up so they can pounce on you and tell you how dumb you are. Most people love putting people down who don't know as much as them as it makes them feel superior.
1:40 I'm like an open book and still crippled by the expectations and presumptions of my peers and others. It sucks so bad. I wish i could meet their expectations
As an "artist" (I don't even like labeling myself as one), I constantly think that if I can do better, then I'm really doing it bad. That may also be due to perfectionism but I constantly compare myself to my great ambitions and feel like I'll never be satisfied.
I am the same at my job. I feel like I can do better everyday. Like I think I can do it faster and better but day, after day, after day and I do it exactly the same, but sometimes with more mistakes, but never faster, sometimes even slower. I am sure that it is possible but i'm gonna quit before I can test this possibility. I actually feel that i would eventually get to that point but i'd need hald a year at best. Regardless of that, having ambitions for yourself and trying to reach the skill level of your peers/superiors is a good thing. Never being satisfied isn't necessarily a problem. No one is ever satisfied. Jordan Peterson is certainly not. Why? Because he's still here teaching us the basics.
I can’t drive. I learned, but never felt like I learned. Each time I drove felt exactly the same. I never felt good about it, and finally had to stop trying. I was in my 40s.
I’m high neuroticism, and still moderate conscientiousness, but in my younger years I would have been high. I was always told I was conscientious, and a over-thinker. It was natural. Everything I could worry about was just so obvious. I was a perfectionist, but not good at anything. I can’t drive. Luckily, at 50 I’ve been able to condense my career down to a manageable focus. I’m semi-retired. For agreeableness, I think I would be high, except in the ways I felt elicited anxiety. As for giving of myself, I was very empathetic, sacrificed myself to the degree that I burned out, and have been left with serious life regrets. I can’t drive due to the fact that I can’t build confidence. That’s putting it simply. I have felt the imposter syndrome feelings for my entire career, with some rise confidence in my 30s. The problem is I gave so much to a broken system, I got anemic and burned out, and now menopause is around the corner. So, there isn’t any confidence of any kind. I am doing what I can to find the balance of it all, and be a good mother to my adult son. I’m a lot of ways, I’m working backward to fix the broken bits. For extraversion, I can’t say where I fall. If I felt confident and pretty, I would be an extrovert…but, in reality I don’t socialize. It feels too heavy…one person at at time usually works ok…months in between. I live in true isolation though, not out of choice. I feel extroverted with my family, but not with others. They feel safe. In regard to openness, I love new experiences, but I’m afraid of travelling. So, anyways, I’ve always felt like a good person. Likeable, but too hard living inside my own self. So, hard to share me with the world. I was forced to in my career, but every moment in caregiving role was scary, and painful no matter how many years that passed.
As someone who suffers with constant imposter syndrome and as jordan more accurately defined as high levels of neutrocism just wanted to say to anybody struggling and always on edge you not alone
I take no pride in ideals... but what I take pride in never stops being idyllic. It's not for me to say what is before manifestation. Only after do I have that right. So I'm inspired to do more with this good time. People need to evenly admire their own lives. Only then can you narrow down what else is waiting for you.
I’m somewhat successful in the eyes of the world but this imposter syndrome keeps nagging me for the past 30years of adult life. People who are naturally confident could never understand what we go through just to stay afloat.
If you live with integrity and authenticity as your inside matches your outside …funnily enough you don’t experience imposter syndrome or it is significantly reduced. The main cause of I S is peoples systemic way of over presenting themselves and thier lives on social media and this has flowed into all areas of life.
While everyone can feel stress or discomfort as they try to improve, the only people I ever hear going on about imposter syndrome are those who genuinely awful and clueless and have no right being in the role they have been assigned (promoted due to nepotism or woke quotas, usually).
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A good thing is,we call a human traits a syndromes...not a pathology anymore
All I can see,imposter, narcissism are the hottest topics now.....
So ,we are in a process of realising what we really are, that's good.The problem is we are blaming each others for something which is our own characteristics..
That's a thing to overcome.....and we will be fine.
But not with religion around.....
@@marcinzadora2050 If You Truly Believe That Pure Religion Is The Primary Source Of The World's Woes, Then It Is My Opinion That You Are Perhaps Sincerely Mistaken.
@messenger ministries Is Being Part Of A Masonic Tradesmens Guild Something To Be Ashamed Of Or Discredited For In And Of Itself?
These Are Deposited As Part Of My Dissertation. Requesting Formal Peer Review.
Album O+ 'Practicing Music'
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Chris, you do very good interviews. I didnt know that i needed to hear this 8 minutes talk, but i did need it. Thank you.
And thanks to professor Peterson.
Impostor syndrome isn’t about comparing yourself to other, it’s more like comparing actual yourself to the Idealistic fantasy version of you that you hold in your head.
Not necessarily. You can feel that way in a new job or in any place where you don't know what to do. It's not tied only to yourself but what you perceive to be whatever role you are trying to fill in. Like not fitting in your father's shoes but on a more realistic scale because the idealistic fantasy version of you comes from yourself. The ideal characteristics of something outside of yourself, like a job, a role, is both an ideal coming from your own mind but also shaped by the beliefs of others. Which isn't to say that your idealistic version of yourself isn't shaped by others but it is more... of a consensus I would say.
And that ideology is supported and grown by the expectation of the society and the half year reviews telling me I'm worthless.
Comparing? I'd assume it would be more like pretending.
Comparing yourself to your ideal self just seems like ambition. When you pretend to be a better person, wich you want to be but you aren't, then you will have cognitive dissonance.
You are correct.
fax
Imposter syndrome is a super common struggle! Thanks for sharing.
I just started a new role in the company I work for, and everything they talked about is true with me. I am going to take the advice and dive head-first into things I don't understand and am scared of. Thank, Professor Peterson.
Congratulations on the new position! I would like to give you some actionable advice that is very easy to implement that iwas given in the same situation.Helped me immensely to not only navigate well but actually rise faster than I would have and avoid a lot of embarrassment and problems
1.have a centralized place where you keep notes.
2.Every time throughout the day and especially at the end of each work day write down everything that you are unsure about.
3. Anything that caused you angst or that felt you needed to know further.
4. Set aside some time each week to research those items further. Actually did it three days during the week.
5. Put them in a word document with a hashtag related to the subject.
This will help you not have to ask the same questions multiple times and you'll have your own searchable database when other things come up in the future. You will also show growth a lot faster which will impress your peers and superiors
I was in a position where somebody got very ill and I got promoted to a role that I was clearly not prepared for.
This advice was given to me and it changed the entire experience it went from being a stressful situation that probably would have took a long time for me to reach parity with my peers to within 6 months, I was actually elevated a second time it's a really good method.
Good luck on the new job!!!
@@ryanackert1536 That's great advice. I'm very grateful. Thank you for giving enough of a damn to write to me. I'll do everything you've said.
@@Revelian1982 you're welcome! Have a good weekend. Good luck!
@@ryanackert1536 Thank you. I'll do my very best.
I'll warn you now that if you're actively listening and asking constant questions, the envious and the incompetent will construe it as ineptitude whether they actually believe that or not. But my advice, based on my own career, is to ignore the haters and bulldoze through with your questions until you feel sufficient mastery of your responsibilities regardless of any snide comments or gestures people make. Once you're on your feet and you transition from a walk to a sprint, your competence and necessity will become apparent to all, even if the envious refuse to admit it and sneer at you forever. If I was a manager, I would take super careful note of those who do that and find any excuse to oust them, but as we all know most managers only become managers by being conniving themselves.
The more severe your worries and preoccupations the less mental CPU time you have to spare for noticing things other people might find blindingly obvious.
I was consistently surprised by positive reactions toward me because I had convinced myself that I was a pathetic loser. This consistency didn't clue me in though. I was lost in a turbid stormy ocean of feeling like I was just clinging on to the rollercoaster of life. I still get lost annoyingly frequently, but getting clarity from external sources like this helps me come up for air. And helps me erode the beliefs I had/have in my mind's bullshit explanations.
I'm the same mate
Wow. That was a slap in the face. This describes me to a t. I'm living in a great neighborhood, all the stuff, two great kids, great income etc but I feel like I'm a big loser and just barely hanging on, like the rug is going to be pulled out from under me any moment.
Relatable
*sever, not severe lol
@@SeanWinters eh? 🤨
The more sever your worries..
That doesn't make sense
This actually reminds me of Napoleon.
In 1796, Napoleon took over the Army of Italy. He was a young, rather inexperienced general, and was expected to hold the line in case the Austrians tried to push into France. What Napoleon did was something no other French general would do: he started asking questions of the French officers who were in Italy before he arrived. He asked them very simple questions, which revealed he has no clue how to do his job being an inexperienced general that he was. But he learned quickly and at the same time earned the respect of older, more experienced but lesser officers. He spoke even to engineers which was shocking because engineers were commoners, not nobles, but they knew how to build and destroy bridges and roads, knew how to get cannons to high hills from which their range could be increased. The young Napoleon asked everybody he could on everything they knew. He learned from common soldiers about the status of equipment and arms, wrote to Paris to make the Directorate send fresh supplies, gunpowder, etc..
Less than a month later, Napoleon launched a surprise attack on the Austrians and whipped their butts. This is how his legend began. By asking questions.
This is a nice story but is it factual?
@@Gabriel_F4924 If only there were Napoleon's biographies around...
@@immortaljanus if only i had an actual interest in history and time to read a whole book on one.
The humility required from a general to discuss subjects with different types of people from all backgrounds is the key quality here and is what Peterson and the other guy are trying to convey as the outshining quality above competence and intellect, or asking questions. Mind you those things are great, it’s necessary to remember what is important when possessing such things as competence and intelligence.
Are there any specific books or documentaries on Napoleon you'd recommend? There are many that talk about the big historical things he did, but I want to know more about things like this, admitting he was inexperienced and taking risks to learn from others
JP does it again. Just the right message at the right time. Simply what I needed to hear. God bless this man, may his health continue to improve.
And his childrens children!!🕺🏽
this hits so close to home, thanks jordan. imposter syndrome has ruined my life and made me feel like a delusional emotionally dysregulated actor and I don't have a sense of self. to know other people suffer of this just allows me to deal with this stuff rationally from now. love, jordan
Me too… we’re not alone brother
“When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.” - Paulo Coelho
ohh no, now there are Paulo Coelho quotes in english too :S
Oh no Paulo Coelho the biggest charlatan of them all! hehe… my biased Brazilian opinion 😂
“we can only go as far as exactly one step further to where our competence stops!”
putin becomes better
I love this guy. He’s the father we all need
This guy doesn't even deserve to be in the same room as my father.
This was a good chat. 6 months ago I quit taking an antidepressant and an adhd drug because I want to pursue something that does not allow either one. I'd been taking the regimen for 6 years. It's been tough for the past 6 months, and I've had moments where I'm certain I need to get back on the medications, but I keep going and proving to myself that I can do my job and run my life generally well without the assistance. It has been a big struggle on some days, but still, we must forge onward, and win!
As an imposter, the imposter syndrome is quite helpful. It gaslights me into thinking I may also be overthinking it, and am actually doing nothing wrong.
Sus
You just mindfucked yourself into being ok, that's straightup admirable
@macaco2885 bro you are crewmate what r u doin
As Charlie Munger often says: the best way to get something is to deserve it
I like that.
Yep, that's why we all die haha
The problem is so many people think they deserve but have don’t feel they shouldnt have to work for it.
@@law844 Well, it is about _deserving_ not "feeling entitled" - but it is true, people confuse those two
@@TheDhammaHub yeah like I said, genocide.
I have some kind of imposter adaptation which has crippled me psychologically, and what I learned listening to this, the sense of being able to stare it down and overcome it gradually to turn it into something more manageable, the hope, the strength to grieve all the psychological pain that I've caused myself (acknowledging my own pain being one of my deficiencies), it's redemption and salvation for a life largely in ruins. So long and so hard I feel like I have strived to fight on and maybe manage to heal someday; catching a break like this is like having somewhere to warm up after being homeless in the cold so long I've forgotten what it's like to be indoors.
I dont even know what I have - Imposter syndrome, ADHD, or whatever else - all I know is that I relate to the pain of constantly feeling unsure of myself and alone in my thoughts, doubting everything I do, if people got the right intention behind my actions/words, and in general afraid of being misunderstood...
Im actually tired, and have no wish to make sense of all that now. Either way, I hope I described why I liked your comment well enough. Hang in there.
With you guys on this.
This clip has brought tears of recognition to my eyes... It's a tough, uphill trail and for me, the steps forward are tiny and slow.
It's exactly the reassurance I needed to hear today. 🙏
So let's cut ourselves some slack and recognise that [7:18]: "it is harder for some people, because it takes more evidence for them to dampen down their response to threat".
We are where we are, and can still aim, move forward with hope, humility and small, intentional steps.✌️
@@thementalself right on!
well done brate
Sus
Thanks for having a discussion about Imposter Syndrome. I did not know about it prior to this but after listening to this discussion, I understand how it fits into my life
I believe that imposter syndrome is a means for the self to protect itself from ego. Because if you develop ego, you stop learning, if you’re insecure about some elements relating to your competence, then you’re in a space of creativity and ingenuity that requires growth & learning alongside it!
I really like this!
BUT insecure people dont see security in asking questions. They make you look bad to others
@@KO-im6sm We have a saying in Arabic (it's a religious one actually), that says: two kinds of people don't learn: the shy/insecure and the arrogant. What Eiman is pointing out is the (risk to be become) arrogant , you're pointing out the first kind. whenever someone is faced by these internal challenges, one question should be asked within ourselves: "do I want to learn?" , if the answer is yes, crush whatever feeling you have at that moment and ask, even if you know that the person in front of you won't be that benevolent and might even see you as stupid (some people are toxic but it should be their problem, not yours because you need an answer, our ego can wait) but the majority of people will be more than glad to help, either because of their genuine will to share info or to show themselves under the best spotlight and boost their own ego... in all cases, you'll win.
Personally, my imposter syndrome has been there all my adult life and I feel it's has been exacerbated by a very critical parent, my dyslexia and dysphagia (late diagnosis) and getting my degree in my 40s. I am a very determined person so even though I have this feeling I will continue regardless and hope it gets better.
All of my life since my earliest recollections
There is a liberation in accepting not every step of the process is a fine art, as the blacksmith, sometimes you just have to beat something into submission before you can sharpen the blade.
It’s harder r we hen we have such problems I can advise standing your ground is good but when you don’t forgive move on and know it can happen will happen but in the end you will be strong enough _~reflection is good 👍
Also we are wired to
Imitate for survival so don’t go hard on yourself ☝️
I have the same issues. Finally got my MBA last year. I work with people fresh out of school. Even thought I have many years of experience in other areas, including fields that support this role… I feel out of place. Best of luck to us.
I was getting the first massage I'd had in a long time and (I forget what she asked me regarding how teaching yoga was going) but I just felt the tears well up and sobbed, "I'm such a fraud." I understand now. I'd *just* started teaching and somehow in the relaxed state acknowledged I had a lot to learn. I'm glad JP said it wasn't a lie because feeling like a fraud felt so much worse than a lie. The good news is that I did overcome my fear of public speaking & people looking at me (instead of faking it) and, of course, gained more education in my trainings which allowed for more confidence.
that is great you overcame some of your struggles. I too have carried this fear of being looked which I think in essence is the fear of being judged negatively. Often we are way too hard on ourselves, I know I have been.
Imposter syndrome is such a strange one. As a musician I'm in a constant cycle of doubting my abilities, because I think that if I keep doubting myself, I will keep getting better. Which is 100% true - I am getting better. But when does it stabilise?
I think, from what he said, it should go away when you stop getting better. When you stop pushing forward.
It seems to be an indication that you're in the right place.
I think a change in the way we think about impostor syndrome is in order
It will be there throughout your journey. As long as you keep growing and exploring new aspects of your craft, imposter syndrome will be there. You adapt to it and recognize it as a sign you are stepping out of your comfort zone. Keep growing and learning!
I wouldnt call it imposter syndrome
I would if your self doubt led you to believe you're not good or worthy of being called a musician
@@ladetygr I think I may have cracked the code within the last six hours: house music.
It's quite a different genre compared to what I usually do - I make alternative rock songs as a guitarist + vocalist. But over the last few years I've realised that I'm getting really sick of the genre, I seem to 'freeze up' and not enjoy myself. House music however, makes me feel free, it's like a breath of fresh air.
What I'm now trying to do is combine the two somehow...
@@vOcHaZOv awesome!!! It's such an amazing experience when we delve into new or revisited territory that just feels right! I'm glad you have found a wave to ride that is sparking the creativity in you!!!
He is a true master of his arts. The wey he speaks hits hard, its really that type where everything around you goes silet just to listen because it really feels truly meaningful.
I work at at an IT company for 3 years now, and i still have this impostor syndrome and anxiety everyday
I feel the same...even if I fix computers on the daily a curveball comes that just destroys my confidence and self-steem...doesn't matter how much I learn I still go to work scared of everything that I don't know
I feel the imposter syndrom with everything I do. I always doubt the things I do and it keeps me from chasing after dreams and things I think would make my life way better. It's really hard.
The lighting setup here is the best I've ever seen.
For a balance of intelligence + communication, nobody tops him. ❤
"That's the thing about asking a "stupid" question, you only have to be ignorant once." -JP
1:42 “..if you’re dealing with competent people”. That is a HUGE if.
2023, i have 3 demons in my head.....depression, anxiety crises and imposter syndrome for over 18 years....its horrible to deal with this because i cant do anything because everytime i have idea or start something knew i instantly think that somebody will do the samething better than me or i will never be a master at that thing just like those guys who does that thing for decades. Not only that, i discover today "the spolight effect" which i had side by side to imposter syndrome. i stopped dancing because people were actually judging me and making jokes about my style and this is not coming from my mind because i saw it happening and all of this bullshit situation going on with my mind started when my (stupid) father started to compare me to the others making those people look better than me and insulting me everytime i had a bad performance at school and wrong decisions......now i am here using the most powerful tool we have today to overcome those 3 demons because i dont have money to go to a professional person to help me.
For me this imposter syndrome came from my early childhood. Also probably assisted in my Neuroticism - 80th percentile I believe. Any error in school, bad test grade, report card etc. Was met with furious yelling from my father, including name calling insults etc. So at 9-14 I was pretty well aware that you should never make mistakes and you should never need help because that means you're stupid. Its been a hell of a ride trying to unlearn that.
Loving the content, man. Don't stop doing what you're doing. I would like to talk to you about translate your videos to PT-BR. I'm sure a lot of people here will love your content. 🇧🇷
This might be the most helpful video I have seen on the subject of imposter syndrome.
It's amazing how you experience these things for yourself and feel that it's an obscure composite of emotions that only you are aware of. But then you watch a video with Jordan Peterson giving a very in depth analysis and understand your issue even more clearly.
Cool thing, I was very sensitive boy, more so than some girls, I moved out of my parents at 19 and went to a different country to study, in a year or so had a full on mental breakdown that lasted maybe a week, after I managed to calm myself down I became much more depressed/uicidal but I also got myself out of that and virtually no one knew about it, and at the end of all of it I became a completely different person. I'm The opposite of myself now, I have much more confidence but it's mostly because I lost the ability to care for anything really and empathy became a chore but I'm somewhat of a good person still. Sensitive people stay fragile if they don't encounter difficulties, but I'd personally recommend such drastic things as I have endured because I feel hollow and I feel almost nothing on a daily basis and it sometimes can be mildly uncomfortable.
P.S.
No one will read it and I'm speaking to myself, but I'm always, mentally, alone, so that's ok.
I actually read your comment.
Sending you positive energy, stay strong and confident.
You’re not alone. Sending hugs your way :)
Good for you. Nobody cares about you. Once you figure that out, you don't have to care about anyone else's business. Live your own life for yourself. Make yourself happy.
I read it. You are never alone.
If you now feel hollow and don’t care for anything really, you are depressed. You can care and feel empathy and then have friends, that must not make extremely vulnerable. Try to engage in other people and activities, that make you happy. And keep boundaries, you can care without
other people hurt you.
It's so true , i am on a journey myself as im about to move out and to study in a new country at just 18 . I'm trying to get as much exposure as I can which I lack before in my school . So I'll take this advice and just dive into the stuff I fear the most
Just what I needed to hear since I have changed jobs recently.
Good luck. It'll get better soon.
Same here. I have struggled with imposter syndrome my whole life but it comes alive when I am in a new situation or job. Unfortunately, I have doubts and questions but I feel like there is nobody to ask. I work in the field and everyone in the office is busy themselves.
The first time I came across this term was when I started writing a short fiction story. Though I lacked experience and knowledge of the main themes of the story, I still continued to write until the imposter syndrome started to get louder until I stopped writing. Felt guilty writing it and sometimes even guilty for stopping. It sucks having that voice that tells you you're way in over your head.
There is one huge mental trick I play on myself when I feel stress from work from some problems that I'm not yet competent enough to solve in spades.
I just say to myself that I'm there VOLUNTARILY. Because that's true: I chose to work there, I chose this position, I chose this field of work. I could have chosen something else. By bringing this idea into my immediate field of consciousness I start to think of the problem as a challenge and myself as a hero. Needless to say I grow as a professional at an unprecedented rate.
It’s almost IDGAFA. I like that! 👌
i love the date this was posted on!
He’s so sophisticated.❤️
Individuals who had a poor or abusive childhood/adolescence where they had few opportunities to really challenge and push themselves could become adults who suffer from imposter syndrome.
I somewhat disagree or maybe misunderstand your point. People with 'rough childhoods' can't handle challenge or adversity? I'd argue that those people who turn their life around and become successful must have already won the battle against their sense of worthlessness and can better cope then those that were pampered or sheltered throughout their childhood.
@@cezardihel2635 "can't handle challenge or adversity" Where did Andrew Cox say they can't handle challenge or adversity?
Not could ...
... does ...
Being a survivor of not only serious childhood abuse, but also being doubted by my extended family of the extent of my - now late - mum's involvement in said abuse, especially towards my younger, severely disabled, sister, means although I _know_ how complicit my mum was, they (the wider family) would never believe me ...
What truly hurts is being surrounded by those whom you would think will support you, especially when your dad is sent to prison for nine years, but never once wrote to me asking if I was OK ...
I could go on, but, the point is, as they made me feel stupid, I always ended up doubting myself because, unfortunately, the way my life has been, has rarely ended up being surrounded by competent people ...
Hence why I get how some men just up, and walk away, because when you're constantly surrounded by incompetence, and the rare occasion you've tried speaking truth to power, but got incinerated for it, eventually you reach a point of utter mental, emotional, and psychological exhaustion, that nothing worthwhile seems worth it anymore ...
No wonder so many young men fall victim to the abyss, especially when it offers the most tempting thing of all: stillness, and silence ...
Yes, this has plagued me my entire life
yeahh
I don't believe in exposing yourself to something to get more confident at it, many singers reveal that they are a nervous wreck before concerts. It is a natural reaction to some type of underlying trauma/feeling/emotion/whatever. The key is to be vulnerable, be honest with yourself and the world and find that underlying issue. For many years I thought I had stage fright, until I realized I would talk in front of a lot of people without anxiety, it was then when I realized that my "stage fright" was actually only active in job related public speeches and the imposter syndrome was behind it. Born from low self esteem and insecurities. It told me, you're gonna fail and they're gonna see you're not who you say you are. To deal and eventually kill my imposter syndrome I had to work on my self esteem and my insecurities, accepting my vulnerability and the fact that I will never be perfect. Everything cracks under pressure. Don't put yourself under pressure
I like what Jordan said about the inevitability of someone who is not a narcissist to experience these waves of self-doubt when initially promoted. It is healthy to know that you are not at the professional level the first day on the job. I have experienced over-compensating leaders and I never wanted to be one, so I try to be transparent to a healthy degree when I need help or encouragement. But it is important to not STAY feeling like an imposter. Recognising others’ feelings about who you are and synthesising that with who you know you are internally helps create a well-rounded understanding of yourself. Watching a lot of Peterson, I recognise the importance of my self-reflection in conjunction with the lives of other people. In other words, the more I know myself, the more agreeable I become to others. The more agreeable and self-realising I am, the more I can respond appropriately to stimuli before I allow an initial reaction to gain control of a situation. Great clip
Great conversation, just prepping for imposter syndrome awareness day tomorrow and noticed this clip!
Hate him or love him. Peterson brings up a lot of mind boggling topics
Jordan B Peterson is the father that i never had. every time i need advice lissen his speakes and learn how to behave and confront the world.
Another great interview with Dr. Peterson.
You're a great listener and interview. It's great to see both your sides of you face for a change😄
On an unrelated note, what a brilliant suit Jordan is wearing. Great lighting and camera too
Can we all just imagine how vastly different this world would be if all the magnificent people with imposter syndrome had just believed in themselves. Where we would be as a species…
@@nitefawl the majority of people are women? So what. That has nothing to do with the op's post. If less men were desperate to get a woman there would be less imposter syndrome? I don't get it.
@@nitefawl "the original post was it was also redundant and irrelevant at best."
Horseshit. Can I make an observation...you are possessed by an ideology.
You analyzed a statement that had nothing to do with sex, by viewing it through an "ideological lens" which warped the said statement using a narrative that doesn't even remotely ring true when investigated to any depth.
"It was not you who ate the idea, but the idea that ate you."
Fyodor Dostoevsky
@@nitefawl but you're assuming that 100 percent of the women "believe in themselves" (whatever you actually mean by that, it's quite vague) when you say that, then there is the other problem: you are professing to "know" what these women think/feel. Dangerous slope.
@@nitefawl haha. Ok I'll agree, 99 percent of western women. How's that?
Impostor syndrome is seen in a negative light. It certainly is hell for newbies but it also exists for experienced individuals. It is most likely also related to our inherent spirit of competition. You can have an idealistic view of yourself which you can never attain but that may be because you lack a role model you can try to reach and surpass. It's the same except that your idealistic version of yourself is imaginary.
for me I think it's pretty much normal to happen since ,whether we like it or not, a decent percentage for why we succeed has nothing to do with our hard work or skills rather it's due to luck or some divine work or whatever you want to phrase it
Just be grounded and centered and real, down to Earth. 🌍
I started playing electric guitar as a young boy about 1967 or so. At 17, I was in a band, and we were starting to get good $$$ gigs. Of course I felt like an imposter... but at least, I thought, I am in a band with another guitarist who was widely regarded as the best in Oregon... perhaps even the tri-state area. So the imposter was able to feel some confidence that A) not as much is required of him, and B) this other guy could carry it all by himself if I imploded. In my early 20's this band was long gone. The imposter had to audition to get into another. The best club band in Portland was advertising for a lead guitarist. They had failed to find one in Portland auditions, so had come down to Eugene. This imposter went, and found he was like #16 to be interviewed and auditioned. All the other guys had big hair, leather jackets, and way nicer equipment than I did. The imposter rolled his Twin Reverb in, wearing a T shirt and jeans. After the audition ("we'll call you", yeah sure) I was crestfallen because of how very good they were. It would have been the best band I could ever hope to join. That night they called, and I got the gig. So, as Jordan says, you may BE an imposter along the way... but at some point, if you're determined, you become that guy instead. JMO
The assimilation of knowledge is power. The proper use of power is Wisdom!!🙏
JP is so real, and so brilliant.
❣️Thank you very much for this segment. ❣️
Practice building your ego. Not to an irrational level, but to a high level. Society teaches us to be little our selves, people who think highly of them selves , have a big ego , are much less likely to not have this imposter syndrome
That’s actually great and practical advice! Wow!! Thank you.
08:14 - Best way forward to overcome imposter syndrome. Great conversation❤
Needed this so much.
Keep facing challenges voluntarily, pay attention.
Neuroticism is your cue, even if it deters and skews your awareness of it and everything else. It’s cunning and it’s purpose is to keep bias and drama alive at any cost. It has the ability to justify with incredible precision. Without true honesty nothing is possible. It’s a long journey but without this awareness, it’s very difficult to improve and move forward. It’s difficult even with it, but at least it offers you some evidence that it’s possible.
Needed to hear this today
Love it!💫 Very insightful! Thank you!
This helped me soooooo much. Thank you
I started a data entry job at a large insurance company a few months ago, they needed someone right away and I was fairly qualified. But cus of how busy it was, training was very basic and some stuff they forgot to tell me. Like 'here is what you do, let me know when you're done, i will do the rest'. My knowledge of life insurance was very minimal. So I have to just keep bothering people about things, or they do things for me cus it's easier than teaching me. They say they rather I ask them, but I take pride in being knowledgeable, taking initiative and problem solving. I often feel dumb or that i really shouldn't be here.
1:08 thanks for that close up. I really needed a better look at JP's hand.
What I got from this is Humility and Expressed Curiosness to competent people can solve imposter syndrome. Have the courage to be perceived as a fool. Also, Repititon - just keep going.
It seems to me, judging by the comments, people are getting it a bit wrong.
Jordan in essence is tapping into the phenomenon from the paradigm of play - from the onset of your life, you adapt yourself to the environment by imitating the best available ideal who has the means of navigating the structure of the world. This, I think, is linked thereafter to every situation you find yourself in. You, as a beginner in any situation, unconsciously start to imitate the person most approximating the successful through their virtues, or rather, you try to embody the virtues and practice your behavior so as to best exemplify those characteristics that breed the most success in the given situation.
This is not inherently a problem, I gauge, until your meta-realization of what you are exactly doing - attempting to bring yourself closer to that chosen ideal via mere imitation - which then breeds the feeling that you are not a sincere representation of the ideal, but that you've rather copied the person embodying the ideal. Which then assumably makes you ponder your own legitimacy in that matter, since you are made aware of the fact that your wisdom is not yours but second hand.
But then, keeping with the play paradigm, that is exactly the right and correct means, acquisition, so long as you also then keep to the realization that you are not the prime authority in given circumstance and never sell yourself as the originator of the ideas and always have an incomplete knowledge corpus. That is what separates the honestly aspiring from the impostor fakes.
Everyone in some sense is attempting to approximate some best avaliable ideal, and as such, their knowledge and opinions acquired is never a portrayal of their own thoughts, that is, one's opinions is merely a linear combination of previously derived opinions of others. You are rarely creating, but rather combining. It is those who embody their derived opinions with the most truth and confidence that come across as sincere rather than as an imposter to others.
2:25 - Yeah, unfortunately, that's how i feel perpetually. I'm perpetually ignorant due to various circumstances and lack of proper education from both the school and parents. Every question I make is apparently stupid and rather than getting an answer i'm shamed for it by multiple people on multiple occasions. I have a million questions, that's how ignorant I am. I get that I have to change right, I have to become competent I have to gain knowledge but I just know that when I do, I will not look the same way at people who treat newbies like that. It creates resentment. And resentment is also "conquearable" but i found out that I do not tolerate intolerant people.
Such fantastic discussion
Incredible discussion... on both sides.
Hard to get rid of feeling like you're bad at something if you genuinely are bad at it.
There’s that but there’s also the issue of doubting yourself even when you aren’t bad at it. Unfortunately, many people have the opposite problem of being over confident in their abilities and unwilling to examine themselves when they fall short.
4:43 great zoom. Added more depth to what he said.
Life-changing discussion
Wow, so eye opening. Thanks.
He says people won't judge you if they are competent. Good luck finding those people. I can tell countless stories of starting new things and having the existing people just start screaming the second you don't know something. They are like wolves just waiting for you to screw up so they can pounce on you and tell you how dumb you are. Most people love putting people down who don't know as much as them as it makes them feel superior.
👏👏👏
I like your style Chris, I'm happy you're living the dream.
1:40 I'm like an open book and still crippled by the expectations and presumptions of my peers and others. It sucks so bad. I wish i could meet their expectations
As an "artist" (I don't even like labeling myself as one), I constantly think that if I can do better, then I'm really doing it bad. That may also be due to perfectionism but I constantly compare myself to my great ambitions and feel like I'll never be satisfied.
I am the same at my job. I feel like I can do better everyday. Like I think I can do it faster and better but day, after day, after day and I do it exactly the same, but sometimes with more mistakes, but never faster, sometimes even slower. I am sure that it is possible but i'm gonna quit before I can test this possibility. I actually feel that i would eventually get to that point but i'd need hald a year at best.
Regardless of that, having ambitions for yourself and trying to reach the skill level of your peers/superiors is a good thing. Never being satisfied isn't necessarily a problem. No one is ever satisfied. Jordan Peterson is certainly not. Why? Because he's still here teaching us the basics.
Fantastic advice
An excellent interview!
Thank you kindly ✍️
Fascinating video! Enough said
I felt this most strongly when starting my youtube channel🤣
Excellent point about imposter adaptation!
I can’t drive. I learned, but never felt like I learned. Each time I drove felt exactly the same. I never felt good about it, and finally had to stop trying. I was in my 40s.
I’m high neuroticism, and still moderate conscientiousness, but in my younger years I would have been high. I was always told I was conscientious, and a over-thinker. It was natural. Everything I could worry about was just so obvious. I was a perfectionist, but not good at anything. I can’t drive. Luckily, at 50 I’ve been able to condense my career down to a manageable focus. I’m semi-retired. For agreeableness, I think I would be high, except in the ways I felt elicited anxiety. As for giving of myself, I was very empathetic, sacrificed myself to the degree that I burned out, and have been left with serious life regrets. I can’t drive due to the fact that I can’t build confidence. That’s putting it simply. I have felt the imposter syndrome feelings for my entire career, with some rise confidence in my 30s. The problem is I gave so much to a broken system, I got anemic and burned out, and now menopause is around the corner. So, there isn’t any confidence of any kind. I am doing what I can to find the balance of it all, and be a good mother to my adult son. I’m a lot of ways, I’m working backward to fix the broken bits.
For extraversion, I can’t say where I fall. If I felt confident and pretty, I would be an extrovert…but, in reality I don’t socialize. It feels too heavy…one person at at time usually works ok…months in between. I live in true isolation though, not out of choice.
I feel extroverted with my family, but not with others. They feel safe.
In regard to openness, I love new experiences, but I’m afraid of travelling. So, anyways, I’ve always felt like a good person. Likeable, but too hard living inside my own self. So, hard to share me with the world. I was forced to in my career, but every moment in caregiving role was scary, and painful no matter how many years that passed.
He's a sage.
As someone who suffers with constant imposter syndrome and as jordan more accurately defined as high levels of neutrocism just wanted to say to anybody struggling and always on edge you not alone
I take no pride in ideals... but what I take pride in never stops being idyllic. It's not for me to say what is before manifestation. Only after do I have that right. So I'm inspired to do more with this good time. People need to evenly admire their own lives. Only then can you narrow down what else is waiting for you.
I’m somewhat successful in the eyes of the world but this imposter syndrome keeps nagging me for the past 30years of adult life. People who are naturally confident could never understand what we go through just to stay afloat.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥thank you for this banger
Every Great Man is an actor of his own Ideal
this is so so true
damn Professor Peterson
but i gotta say this made me feel so much better
So insightful!
Asking questions is a sign of intelligence.
If you live with integrity and authenticity as your inside matches your outside …funnily enough you don’t experience imposter syndrome or it is significantly reduced. The main cause of I S is peoples systemic way of over presenting themselves and thier lives on social media and this has flowed into all areas of life.
While everyone can feel stress or discomfort as they try to improve, the only people I ever hear going on about imposter syndrome are those who genuinely awful and clueless and have no right being in the role they have been assigned (promoted due to nepotism or woke quotas, usually).
I'm so glad he used the undergrad to grad. Last semester was my first semester in grad school I dealt with Hella imposter syndrome!!!
Watched this video and I am no longer sus! Thank you mister Jordan Peterson for changing my life
I feel this way as an undergraduate student. Do you have any advice on how to deal with resulting depression? I need to dig myself out of the hole.
see 'Grand Jury - The Court of Public Opinion' with world-class experts on current situation, see also 'How Bad is my Batch'
“Every great man is an actor of his own ideal” ~ indeed!! And I think that’s what makes one feel like an imposter.