It’s sad to spend 30 years with someone you think is your soulmate only to find out how easily you can be discarded in the end by these people. Mind blowing in fact!
You fell in love with yourself for probably the first time ever. Because their mirroring showed you that you are OK, and that's something you were never taught growing up.
I just had this epiphany before seeing this video - I went back to my journal entry where I listed about 50 adjectives about him called "why do I love you so much?"... and realized I was describing my very best qualities. Not his. I absolutely am grieving how loving him made me FEEL, not his love, or an external connection. I miss being that IN LOVE...because I felt like my VERY BEST SELF. Finding this difficult to heal from after only 5 weeks of knowing him!!!!
@@Daimo83 I am in a 12-step recovery program for codependency. Yes I am a raging codependent. Healing in layers, over time. At least this time it's 5 weeks not 5 years. :)
Only someone who has been through this horrific experience can express the feelings and thoughts we go through the way you do. I love love love your videos. Thank you!
Once your humanity shows, your feelings/fears/etc, they don't want to deal with it and devalue starts. Mine would just give silent treatment after cutting off my expression of Self. Whoa. Awful stuff.
Ms. Em you nailed it. Exactly they don’t want to deal with your feelings and specially fears. They will leave you in your worse period of life. It might involve death of close relatives and then they will be projecting such on themselves.
Same! My ex wouldn’t devalue me openly. He was extremely neglectful and put 0 effort into building a relationship with me (after future faking marriage and children). He just wanted the fun part, the perks that come with having a partner and my unconditional love, but he had no intention of ever working to build a stronger couple or even communicate in a healthy manner. It was all blame shifting and stonewalling.
Z U ZU Omg yes. My ex best friend caused so much drama out of nowhere a month after my father passed away. She even talked crap about my dad while I was grieving. Said I was fake & she’s never coming back in my life ( she was always in & out of my life for no reason). But low & behold she had the audacity to come back. I had to change my phone number.
I though this guy was my soulmate and he ran away with another woman. I loved him more than anybody I have ever known. When we didn’t talk I was crushed and worked on myself a lot but was still sure we would end up together. We saw each other again and he didn’t even acknowledge me which made me just die inside. I realized that our relationship was the same as the relationship I had with my abusive father. It was humiliating to realize this and it still kills me that I couldn’t get our relationship to work. I know he is still awful for me and I am really having a problem moving past this. I realize it’s a trauma bond but it’s like living hell on Earth.
It’s hurts knowing it wasn’t real but just know the feeling he gave you, the love bombing was all you, you fell in love with you, not him, he was just mirroring you.
This is what I thought about my connection after starting my spiritual awakening journey, post explosive discard. I feel like he had a greater purpose in my life. He is my twin flame/mirror and we have a soul contract that was meant to push me into my greater calling and life purpose. The feeling of the "soulmate connection" bound me to him long enough to get me to my literal breaking point. To where I had no choice but to be thrust into awakening spiritually. In hindsight, I am actually thankful for his role in this process.
My soulmate I was nine-years-old going out to play, my mother was reading the local paper and she said "awe some little girl in Canton got bit by a brown recluse spider" as I walked out the door I prayed for her as I walked up the street beside my house I continue to pray for that little girl Fast forward 45 years, a friend introduced me to Nancy who lived in Canton 30 miles from my hometown I fell in love almost immediately about two months into our relationship she told me that when she was 10 years old she had been bitten by a brown recluse spider, the only one in Ohio to have ever been bitten by one at the time Believe me I was stuck to me this meant that God had planned this all for my good It took me 14 years to get to where I am today Totally ravaged my heart that the one that I prayed for turned out to be so twisted Beware of that "brown recluse"
I didnt know about the twin flame thing. It makes sense. One part of the soul can love but lacks some of the worldliness needed to really read people. The other part is very good at reading people but is incapable of love. Romeo and juliet without the need for warring families. It explains a lot actually.
When I remet my recently departed Nex 2 years ago in Spain after 50 years of living separate lives my 1st thought was WOW !! someone close to my own age who looks good and has similar travel experiences and is the same birth sign as me- Perfect !! Then after a few a months of living together and questions about her past/3 marriages/her constant moving/conflicts which were always everyone else's fault began to surface the shine started to fade, she would avoid going into depth about anything and I started to get my doubts, suddenly a trip back to the UK loomed for an errand, and after dropping her off at the airport- nothing. That was 2 months ago, no calls/texts apart from the one telling me to dispose of all her things because she was starting a new life elsewhere, I was sleeping with an alien !! I pity the poor soul who's with her now.
For anyone who is suffering after a breakup with a narc know that you are not alone i’m having a hard time as well thru this healing process but please realize that God loves you ❤️ so much please rely on him and him ONLY to get you through this blessings to you all and stay prayed up 🙏🏾 this is a great video btw thank you so much!
No, don't really believe in the concept, I'm very weary of people who try and force emotional connections too soon before they really know you as a person from all aspects. It's a false narrative they are spinning and like you said it's based on mirroring and keeping hidden their true self in the beginning.
i don't doubt it is a soul mate. Soul mates are not just positive mates. They can be negative as well because I did learn a lot of myself and even his darkness was a gift.
I needed to hear this so much right now! As a teenager, I remember saying to my mom that maybe not everyone's soulmate is their lover, maybe for some it's a friend and I thought my best friend was my soulmate. I need to find the video about trauma bond because I think that will really resonate with me. I definitely agree about the mirroring. I'm starting to realize when I'm missing her, I'm missing the person she mirrored back to me.
If feeling that this individual is “familiar”, actually treats you the way your close relative did in your childhood (my father was mine), then YES, s/he can be your “soulmate”. Most of us require ourselves to heal childhood wounds. By being with a toxic abuser, the familiarity allows us to learn about our ways of being with this individual, and to help us move away from abuse and to heal our selves. I don’t condone abuse of any kind. I know that being with the toxic ex taught me to honor and respect my SELF, and to find help along the way to HEALING. Will I go back to him? Short answer: NO! (Longer answer: if I couldn’t convince him in THIRTY [30] years that I loved him and that he would be safe with me, there was no way I could stay another second with him!) “Soulmate” for learning the lessons for healing? YES! “Soulmate” for loving, living with, and growing old with? NOPE! NOPE! NOPE! Blessings!❤️
A lot of narcs actually are using this card now and will tell many different women that they ARE their soul mates or even twin flames. For women who believe in this it’s an immediate hook!
The Narcissist as "Hero"?? They impact many people throughout their life, hurting them but in reality these people they hurt need the lesson, so they are sacrificing their life to be of service to others?? I'm being a bit sarcastic, but it could be true! I think my mother was an alcoholic narcissist, and then I married one at 18 which led to a long line of bad relationships after my divorce. I recently "woke up", after my second divorce from (I think) a covert narcissist, and then right after realized my grown son is a covert narcissist! I can't tell you the pain it all caused me, but everything became crystal clear. All my confusion about some things my son said or did over the years made sense now. The lack of empathy, the blank stare, the hurtful snide comments. I feel like I've been broken into pieces and spirit is now rebuilding me. As I awoke the other day I heard, "You are an empath and a healer". I was a nurse for many years. Now I see narcs in my life in technicolor whereas before I made excuses for them, or was just confused... cognitive dissonance. Karmic contracts are real. I thank them and forgive them ...(well, working on it) ...for it all, because I needed it for growth. I'm now looking for my soul tribe as I'm pretty much alone and cannot rely on anyone. My lesson was to love myself, prioritize myself, have boundaries. Still learning every day. Why did it take so long, I'm a senior now... it takes as long as it takes. ♥ p.s. new subscriber.
Totally...like a spell! The spell broke for me when friends alerted me to some incriminating facebook posts. Thank you for saying this. I feel like the spell was broken and I don't feel the same, and I know if I read his words... I could fall in love again... so I am rejecting his long letters...
Krista Olson Thanks but I got a little puzzled by what you wrote. Because the whole point of the spell breaking, is the realization that there was never anything nice and valuable, and it can never be. You know, my narc has made passionate hoovering attempts. I faced them the same way I face the love bombing of her current boyfriend, or the reminissence/invoking our “good old days”. With sardonic irony, and hardly containing a nervous laughter, as If I m at a funeral and notice a very silly wig worn by a mourner.
I never like to completely rule out the possibility of a twin flame connection, but it's HIGHLY unlikely. Otherwise, the narcissist would be twin flames with all their targets 🤷♀️
I thought exactly the same, twin flame and Narcissist present in the same way. Mirroring is a big one for both. Twin flame does the whole running thing as well which kinda fits the Narcissist so very easy to confuse the two.
Same. I thought it was a soulmate and twin flame connection. Then I got into tarot readings and that just messed up my mind even further. Be careful what you allow to enter your thoughts.
That is amazing- “when you are missing a narcissist - you are missing the good parts of yourself”. That how I felt, I was sending something like this, but I never verbalized it . You made it for me! This is incredible! I was like trying to explain as my internal feelings, my point of view my memories, that I am missing, reflection of the last through my soul. But it is really - missing my self, the best parts of myself.
You are so amazing! Thank you for not hiding your thoughts on twin flame/soulmate connections. I needed this insight & knowledge so very much! Thank you !
This was great! Let me explain, I was recently discarded by a narcissist. what has been bothering me though is that we're poly and she's married although I know the marriage itself has a few challenges. well, it was bothering me at first that this narcissist is able to maintain her relationship with her husband after discarding me. But, now I get it, her husband is a per her actually an extreme empath and based on what she says, he's also very codependent on her. He's going to be around with her and for her, but it isn't because she has a special love for him, it's because he wound up being her twin flame, and I ain't! This was exactly what I needed
I can so relate to this. I got cheated on and deceived and lied to when myself and everyone around me thought I had the fairytale. He completely regretted it and was so so sorry but when we got back together, he became emotionally abusive and more controlling. I believe the cheating gave him that level of control and he didn’t have it any more. I had to go no contact as his words would pull me back in again and take me right back but he never changed. My ex used to throw around the twin flame and soulmate word, so early on too. I think my ex loved me ( he proposed to me and we were getting married) but he doesn’t have the ability to love in a healthy way. All I know is, in my life I’ve never felt a connection like I had and I’m so scared Of never having that again.
This is an original and thought-provoking video, thanks! I don't believe in soulmates, but a lot of people do and feel the narc as their soulmate. I'm thankfully aware now, so in my most recent experience with a new narc who tried to reel me in, I noticed the following: His first attempt had a humorous sexual flavour ("so am I going to be punished?"). He then tried very hard to spot a weak 'entrance' into me, for example he showed me a variety of different device wallpapers, on different days that is ("isn't this baby lovely?", "oooh I love whales"). This was in a mix-and-match combination with a variety of serious sob stories from his life, and also with flirty 'accidental' touches, and looking at me straight in the eyes, with sort of puppy eyes. Thoughout this whole performance, I was sweet, smiley, polite, but not really reacting to any of the above, just waiting to see if he was actually going to ask me out. No! he didn't! and in the end he just disappeared. Note here that he had already told me he has a girlfriend, who, however, "he's having serious problems with". Textbook or what!
I've always liked the fantasy of soulmates and twin flames. I have found this belief keeps you in relationships that aren't good for you a lot longer than you would if you didn't hang on to the fantasy. This fantasy is now shattered, I'm looking at life and people from a realistic point of view from now on. The intense feelings when you meet someone, the coming home feeling is an illusion, wanting something so bad your mind creates this fantastical reality and ignores all the realistic incompatabilities.
True. What makes things worse in my case is this person was chosen by my soul to wake me up spiritually to things like angels, what's real versus fake, spirituality. And so I had a few spiritual healers tell me he is a soulmate, but I tested him too early, or I was too "messed up" that he didn't want to deal with me. And that I loved him. So that additional programming fed my trauma bonding even more, rather than me get sectioned and get mental health support that I truly deserved at the time. I had another spiritual person tell me he is the twin flame, and I latched onto that false theory for years and years - and totally obsessed by him, not realising I also had negative entities and energies in my field that were ensuring I lost the impetus to heal my own life and succeed in life. Energy and years got sucked away, and this person was married and happily so, not wanting anything from me. So we need to be aware that we are unconsciously neglecting our own growth and happiness when we run after a narcissist. I had no idea I was Codependent until last year, and that I had been attracted to all people with narcissistic traits, including my parents and family and friends and healers with little integrity - because that's how compromised my mind has has been for 14 years. May we all break from the shackles of pain and suffering and trauma in the best ways possible and ASAP. Your life is so worthy of a full heart connection with your Creator and with yourself first. 💖
I used to have laughing fits during the love bombing phase. I couldnt figure it out. I have never in my life had experienced such a thing being around someone. I would fall down on the ground laughing my head off and hed just stand there looking at me with a smirk on his face.
No such thing as a soul mate. It's just a label people put on a partner to feel secure, like an extra layer of protection based on fear of being abandoned. People who believe in soul mates are exactly the perfect targets for narcissists. Realise there are literally millions of people you can have a special connection with and forget that soul mate nonsense
That and..."other lifetimes"? The video creator just casually drops this as an explanation for soulmates. Poetic, sure, but not provable as far as I can see.
I think you are right. I fell deeply in love with my ex but he then randomly ghosted me for life problems and yeah broke my heart into little pieces. And now I love him despite him being out of my life.
3 strong "loves", a few crushes, several bad characters, a bout of psychosis, depression, 2 years of CBT: After 10 years I think Im getting to the last stage of grief: acceptance. He "loved" me sort of- but we didnt have a great connection- except for me picking up on his vulnerability that was really just his crippled cowardly self. All tenderness was on my end. And I just got hooked by trauma. There wasnt much special happening. I know now. But I do miss the highs. Now that Im wise to it I repel predators- or at least see them quickly, but sadly I dont drawn in anyone healthy. I still find man-children who want me to do everything and are apathetic or I meet smart witty charmers who are wicked and broken. I hate it. I just work and go to school and live my life. Naturally I am a loner although I am very popular at work and school. Nothin ever evolves even with my effort. People are different these days and Im not often what people want. But Im glad I dont get drawn in with bad characters. That stuff is soul-stompingly painful
You said this so well- i thought she was my soul mate bc of the trauma bond..bc i also went back after abuse and covert cheating... Not my soulmate, but she may have been my twin flame. So much coincidence and connection... And I like the idea that can't be soulmate bc of incapability of love... Can't believe you mentioned the soul contract. That was definitely the case . I felt it many times
So true. People used to tell me he is bad news but my response was always: I know what I know. I know him better than anyone else and you don't see the truth like I do. Even when he treated me sssooo badly I just couldn't stay away because I believed in some secret amazingness within him that only I knew of.
OH MY GOD....!!!!!!!!!! I have told him since week 2 "I KNOW you." and "You KNOW me" and then he started saying that too. And I am still in contact (week 5). I feel like I see the truth under the craziness of it all... he still is treating me well, I'm in the love bombing phase, but cerebral narcissism is on my radar BIG TIME. I am spending hours watching youtube videos and reading the comments to fortify myself and prepare myself for inevitably having to go no contact before the beautiful part even is over.
Kristen don't let it go too far. I studied psychology and STILL fell for the tricks. Narcs are amazing manipulators. Somewhere inside me I knew something was wrong but I listened to the tiny bit in me that told me otherwise. And it cost me an extremely high price. Not only did I lose serious amounts of money but also my family.
@@Corne79 Thank you - I am blocking his email as we speak (saw I had a youtube comment so I was eager to read it - for encouragement of course!). THANK YOU SO MUCH, SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!
The reason I feel he is, is because while dating I did our astrology chart just to make sure I wasn’t wasting my time with someone who wasn’t compatible with me. I wanted to listen to the universe this time instead of relying on my own judgment that’s been pretty poor over the years.... The chart was a 10 out of 10 compatibility wise! literally, I’ve done charts for self and many others. it’s always been some negative aspects with some positive aspects, which would seem normal because everyone is different, but never in my life had I read a chart that was 100% positive aspects! It said I would be with a Scorpio & him a virgo! It even said we might get married!!!!!!!!!! 🤯 I’ve done numerology & I read “the pattern” ... it says our souls are traveling in the same direction and by teaming together we will accomplish our life purposes! also that Im here to make him “grow up” , face reality, and evolve. 🤦🏽♀️ As you can see... This is confusing as hell because now I feel like it is indeed a destined soul mate situation. And The universe brought us together to teach us divine lessons. I’m not saying I can “fix him” but I do have a higher understanding of his conquests to find real love and purpose. Almost as though his inner compass is weeding through people propelling him towards his most powerful transformation. So in a nutshell, I’m like what in the hell does this all mean!???? Why would the universe tell me a covert narc is perfect for me if he can’t be helped. I don’t want to trauma bond my whole life! I just want love too! Help!!! 😩
I do believe it is a soulmate situation & this is why... when we were dating I did our astrology chart as to let the universe lead and not pick relationships based off my own judgment as it has been pretty poor in the past 🥴 The reading compatibility wise was a 10 out of 10! Which had blown me away because I am used to doing charts for self and many others and I never seen that before. Usually they come with some positive aspects and some negative aspects, which I thought made sense seeing that everyone is different, but our particular chart had 100% positive aspects. It said he would be with a Virgo and I a Scorpio! it even said we could get married!!! Not only that, I also read our numerology and the “pattern app”. It said our souls were traveling in the same direction and by teaming up together we would encourage each other to fulfill our life purposes!!!! It also said I am here to make him grow up, face reality, and evolve while he is here to make me accept my shadow self & feel at home in my own body. So Yes, he discarded me and it hurt to my core as I’ve never experienced anything like that before but it taught me a very valuable lesson. It forced me to look at my codependency, self love deficit, & the parts of myself I had rejected my whole life. It was like a magical initiation where I tore myself down to rebuild stronger than ever! I realized my worth! 🙏🏽 Upon my climb to success I believe my rising will be his ultimate lesson to raise his frequency or miss out on the life of his dreams! I guess the way I view him from a higher understanding, is that he’s sort of viciously weeding through people out of desperation to find love and fulfillment. As if an internal compass will stop at nothing to get him where he needs to go in life because there, I believe, he’ll meet his ultimate transformation as I did. So in a nutshell I’m sure you can see why this is confusing as hell. Lol I literally sit back and say what does this all mean and why would the universe tell me that a narcissist is perfect for me?! Especially if he can’t be changed! Am I a narc too? Lol jk ... maybe 👀😂 I am a believer that nothing is impossible and that Spirit works in mysterious ways beyond our human understanding. I just want to make sure I’m not trauma bonding for the rest of my life expecting him to evolve either! I have learned the importance of self love but it’d be nice to receive real external love too!! help! lol
Twin flame is what I always thought we were . He has done nearly everything possible to make me hate him. But I don’t. And I have dated many men I do give many chances but once someone says they are done with me I move on with quickness . He has said he’s done as well as discarding me without saying anything ! And I still have to get him back every time . I’m so addicted to this man .but I really feel like he’s made for me . I don’t know if he’s a narcissist , my dad is , and he’s not completed like my dad. He has hardly ever said anything flat out mean to me. He’s just never satisfied . Every time we doing good in my eyes he leaves
Yes, i still feel a narcissist is my soul mate. Im repeatedly being told that ours' is a Divinely Guided deep soul connection. But its possible that the narc doesn't pay attention to his higer self "
The most HUGE difference NPD vs TF in the very beginning is : NPD will MIRRORING the best part of you or reach THE SAME LEVEL as you to knocking your steel door to let them in so they could lovebombing you, while TF will realized the fact that they are A TOTAL OPPOSITE of you in SO MANY WAYS, and whether both you have so deep connection you both will always want to resist your connection because of too many differenciations. And when the connection went further, you will feel NPD is just the Mr./Mrs. Right for you because they will showering love and presents a.k.a lovebombing you, while with TF there's none lovebombing. LOL. Instead you will started questioning yourself, because now you realized that your TF is so imperfect person with all of those scars, flaws, and elses that you NEVER even imagined you _could_ in love with.
Hoping that my soul mate would be the true love and so we would be able to offer support and unconditional love in abundance without it really being an effort means the narcastist could not have been the soul mate, I would hope not the twin flame but it does make sense of how meeting your twin flame could end in the same destructive manner as with narcastist relationships. Probably provoking narcastic behaviour from each other
My narc exes def felt like soul mates. The first girl bonded with me over a specific genre of music. The second was an incredible listener. I am not sure what was real or fake. I was connecting to their false self mirroring. Neither was capable of real love.
i tell you the story/ i was predicted to meet a soulmate during some time. i have met a narcisstic guy and fell in love/ cause i thought he is my soulmate/ and i was 100% sure he is my twin flame and still kind of believe it. cause after he dumped me he start looking a lot older then before
Narcissist’s are not born narcissist’s.. this is something that happens to them on their life’s journey. They are born with a pure soul and of course, there may be be a soulmate destined for them. I can’t agree with your assumption that ignores this fact.
Omg , I was still married with my ex when I met my narcissist. We moved in together after three months of knowing each other, I divorced with my ex after six months and married my narc after 9 months of knowing each other and straight away I get pregnant. It is so funny because I am highly inteligent and educated person with ability to read people. I am sorry to laugh at it because I know for most people it is tragic situation but it is really funny for me. It is ok , I am dealing with him with my own way, hope to survive. I am very self confidence person , not surprised I fall in Love with my mirror :p and I hope he will not be able to break this confidence :)
You're literally sat here confessing the fact that you gave up on your marriage with one man for another man and calling the other man a narc. Im sorry..are you out of your mind? Thats ridiculous.
Im struggling so much to let go of her. She hurt me so bad. And somehow i still miss her so much. What the hell is wrong me? I want this to be over. I too thought she was my soulmate. 💔
So if you finally get the nerve up to take a protection order out after 23 years and now your 14 year old daughter hates you and won't come home. I raised her, I stayed home with her and he has somehow manipulated my daughter to treat me the same way. In the beginning I was done but I saw him last week and now i am thinking I miss him and maybe he will change.....my heart is broken 💔 😢
I don't not feel or think that they are my soulmate. LOL they (flying monkeys) just stalk me all day and do noticeable things to show they are always illegally watching me, and raging at me, and trying to control everything I'm doing. Everyday. Non Stop. Many times when I go out to eat by myself, they'll send flying monkeys to act like they are eating with me. When I go to the movies by myself they'll send flying monkeys to surveil me and even cough at certain parts of the movie to communicate. When I play music and the song is saying something sweet they'll slam a car door or resort to some type of noise. When I'm watching a movie and the movie says something like, "But I love you" they'll slam a car door or make some type of noise. This is covert communication but its really lies. When they do stuff like I just explained it;s because they don't want anything good to resonate with you unless they have something to do with it. Even if they don't love you and care about you. Keep in mind I stay alone and this is me getting stalked and harassed from a distance. Remotely. They would even make the fridge make these popping noises when they feel I should be eating. They'll even do things like slam car doors as soon as I'm done watching a movie, or slam car door when song go off, or slam car door when I'm done typing. Harassing me with triggering noise. And if they want to harass me with noise after a song goes off and I replay the song, they would send a car coming back to back to back to back until they get to do the tactic they want to do to me at the time they wanted to do it. LOL. pathetic. And the longer I go without eating they make the fridge make louder noises. Very obnoxious, controlling stalkers. It's all unwanted on my end. And the more they do this i see the more they start feeling entitled. Some people are actually married and actually staying with people like this, and that's sad. I'm glad I'm not married and staying alone. There's times when I was sleeping in my car and they'd wait til i wake up and crank their car on when they saw me get out the car or sit up straight. Or they'd wait until I was falling asleep and shine there headlights on my car. Although isolation is what they want so they can treat you wrong and no one would believe you but its being more clear how these narcs operate. So I don't mind being alone until things really turn back in GOD'S FAVOR View my instagram @tsktskteaser
I don't believe in souls mates. No one is destined to anyone for eternity. We must love who we allow into our life with our best self, but every connection will end one day.
Romance movies and books don't help with any of this--tons of trauma and drama plays out as true love... wish they could show a healthier model in modern art.
Great vid but imo soulmates are not always romantic! Everyone has a soulmate in their life! Friends, family, indeed love! They are those in your soul family you chose to incarnate with for various lessons/missions etc not the disney romantic definition of 'soulmates' in mainstream consciousness. Narcs' i think are most likely soulmates as soulmates are here to teach you lessons you are not necessarily meant to end up romantically involved! So soulmates imo can be in your life for 1 week or 10yrs! Twins are a whole other kettle of fish! Twins have that pull and ultimate mission which is why they are incarnating now! high frequency souls. With twins i feel it is not a case of falling in love but remembering that love!😋 it is deeeeep haha. I cannot imagine a narc' being a twin if the capacity for heart centred love is absent! but these are just my observations and understanding of it all! So not concrete fact lol💗
I don’t believe in narcissism at all I do believe in childhood trauma and how every parent in our life has messed each of us up. I’ll take a listen to this video and see how I can talk to my boyfriend about this. He mirrors me when it comes to food. We both mirror each other. He doesn’t share my interests at all just mirrors me when it comes to food or if I say “I like how you used to have a beard” next time I see him he has a beard. Lol! 🤦🏽♀️ So creepy but so sexy to. Not gonna lie. Lol! I have a bad trauma bond with this guy it sucks. What’s weird is that I trashed him online then deleted it. 🤔🤷♀️ I think if I work on my childhood trauma from my parents I can break this soul tie but it’s been hard.
Crap, I thought she was a soul mate and we were SO MEANT TO BE TOGETHER. The only connection, was I let her trick me. BTW she's Covert and all the traits fit her perfectly. Sadly there's absolutely no way to have a successful relationship with her and I fell in love with her. She convinved me I was the bad guy, I did everything wrong. My head has been so messed up, I have had to talk to other women, I have no relationship with, tell them first what I did wrong so I could get unbias feedback, they told me how ridiculous and crazy my wife acts. I let her bash me for so long, I forgot I'm a pretty nice guy.
Agree narcissist can never be a soul mate they have no sence of self awareness. This is why they mirror us. We they are reflecting us back to us this is why they seem like "our soul mates" lol 😆 had to Crack up on this video this should give you amo to move on down the road.
There is no such thing as a soulmate. Love is hard work and you're not going to find anybody where it all just falls into place. Our generation grew up on Disney and it shows.
The sad part is you fell in love with this person, because you shared all the same intellectual and entertainment pursuits. You really made a connection that way including great sex with that it all had to be spoiled by his behavior. This is what you grieve is the good stuff if your guy was not a total sociopath, but basically a decent person who didn’t help you did you do things for you? I didn’t support you, but he has that one little 5% Can I control his temper and outbursts and that you don’t know what he’s upset about takes it out on you.
No, I don't think hes my soul mate, actually I don't think I really believe in Soulmates. But I do know that I still love him and want to be with him regardless of all of the bad mouthing he's done of me.. or the fact that he had me evicted from his house in a court of law last summer.. I feel like the stupidest woman alive because nothing he does is ever the final straw for me even when I think it is. I keep feeling like WHEN am I going to have my ENOUGH moment?
Hey, you're not stupid, it's never the victim's fault, you're emotionally dependent, so everything he does to you you'll still feel that you "need him" or that "love him" I hope you're well after these years after your comment
Not to be contrary, but since “soul mate” does not have a scientific definition, it is difficult to say who is and who is not one. I mean, I believe we have more then one soul mate. And sometimes we don’t stay with them, for whatever reason. I think it is strange to think our soul mates must have good intentions or that our relationships with them will be good and healthy. Maybe your soul mate is just an asshole in this life lol. Perhaps they will learn something or fulfill a karmic debt. Who knows. That said, you shouldn’t stay with someone who is toxic even if you think/feel they are your soul mate. I hope I explained what I am thinking well. It is hard to do in text.
Yup, she was the literal best…until she wanted to provocate false derogatory narratives on my character and coerced a ruined relationship. They think you’re perfect…until they devalue you you. It’s all them.
It’s sad to spend 30 years with someone you think is your soulmate only to find out how easily you can be discarded in the end by these people. Mind blowing in fact!
Sorry
My parents are in their late 60s and dad hasn’t worked out that mom’s a narc yet. I hope he finds a higher love in his lifetime.
You fell in love with yourself for probably the first time ever. Because their mirroring showed you that you are OK, and that's something you were never taught growing up.
I just had this epiphany before seeing this video - I went back to my journal entry where I listed about 50 adjectives about him called "why do I love you so much?"... and realized I was describing my very best qualities. Not his. I absolutely am grieving how loving him made me FEEL, not his love, or an external connection. I miss being that IN LOVE...because I felt like my VERY BEST SELF. Finding this difficult to heal from after only 5 weeks of knowing him!!!!
That's 100% codependency
@@Daimo83 I am in a 12-step recovery program for codependency. Yes I am a raging codependent. Healing in layers, over time. At least this time it's 5 weeks not 5 years. :)
Best comment ever
This comment... thank you.
Only someone who has been through this horrific experience can express the feelings and thoughts we go through the way you do. I love love love your videos. Thank you!
Once your humanity shows, your feelings/fears/etc, they don't want to deal with it and devalue starts. Mine would just give silent treatment after cutting off my expression of Self. Whoa. Awful stuff.
Ms. Em you nailed it. Exactly they don’t want to deal with your feelings and specially fears. They will leave you in your worse period of life. It might involve death of close relatives and then they will be projecting such on themselves.
Same! My ex wouldn’t devalue me openly. He was extremely neglectful and put 0 effort into building a relationship with me (after future faking marriage and children). He just wanted the fun part, the perks that come with having a partner and my unconditional love, but he had no intention of ever working to build a stronger couple or even communicate in a healthy manner. It was all blame shifting and stonewalling.
Z
U ZU Omg yes. My ex best friend caused so much drama out of nowhere a month after my father passed away. She even talked crap about my dad while I was grieving. Said I was fake & she’s never coming back in my life ( she was always in & out of my life for no reason). But low & behold she had the audacity to come back. I had to change my phone number.
@@claudiacastillo5898 Yep.
Omg exactly devalue started so fast early because I got hurt physically and they just immediately changed
I though this guy was my soulmate and he ran away with another woman. I loved him more than anybody I have ever known. When we didn’t talk I was crushed and worked on myself a lot but was still sure we would end up together. We saw each other again and he didn’t even acknowledge me which made me just die inside. I realized that our relationship was the same as the relationship I had with my abusive father. It was humiliating to realize this and it still kills me that I couldn’t get our relationship to work. I know he is still awful for me and I am really having a problem moving past this. I realize it’s a trauma bond but it’s like living hell on Earth.
It’s hurts knowing it wasn’t real but just know the feeling he gave you, the love bombing was all you, you fell in love with you, not him, he was just mirroring you.
This is what I thought about my connection after starting my spiritual awakening journey, post explosive discard. I feel like he had a greater purpose in my life. He is my twin flame/mirror and we have a soul contract that was meant to push me into my greater calling and life purpose. The feeling of the "soulmate connection" bound me to him long enough to get me to my literal breaking point. To where I had no choice but to be thrust into awakening spiritually. In hindsight, I am actually thankful for his role in this process.
Exactly how i feel
My soulmate
I was nine-years-old going out to play, my mother was reading the local paper and she said "awe some little girl in Canton got bit by a brown recluse spider"
as I walked out the door I prayed for her as I walked up the street beside my house I continue to pray for that little girl
Fast forward 45 years, a friend introduced me to Nancy who lived in Canton 30 miles from my hometown
I fell in love almost immediately
about two months into our relationship she told me that when she was 10 years old she had been bitten by a brown recluse spider, the only one in Ohio to have ever been bitten by one at the time
Believe me I was stuck
to me this meant that God had planned this all for my good
It took me 14 years to get to where I am today
Totally ravaged my heart that the one that I prayed for turned out to be so twisted
Beware of that "brown recluse"
I didnt know about the twin flame thing. It makes sense. One part of the soul can love but lacks some of the worldliness needed to really read people. The other part is very good at reading people but is incapable of love. Romeo and juliet without the need for warring families. It explains a lot actually.
I was with mine to resolve a huge childhood wound in myself - and im,working on it and understanding how I got drawn in
exactly
Yes same! She acted like the opposite of that wound til she reared her true head and showed me the injury
And the empaths are desperate for deep intimate connection.. this makes so much sense why they attract each other: they are both desperate!
When I remet my recently departed Nex 2 years ago in Spain after 50 years of living separate lives my 1st thought was WOW !! someone close to my own age who looks good and has similar travel experiences and is the same birth sign as me- Perfect !!
Then after a few a months of living together and questions about her past/3 marriages/her constant moving/conflicts which were always everyone else's fault began to surface the shine started to fade, she would avoid going into depth about anything and I started to get my doubts, suddenly a trip back to the UK loomed for an errand, and after dropping her off at the airport- nothing.
That was 2 months ago, no calls/texts apart from the one telling me to dispose of all her things because she was starting a new life elsewhere, I was sleeping with an alien !!
I pity the poor soul who's with her now.
For anyone who is suffering after a breakup with a narc know that you are not alone i’m having a hard time as well thru this healing process but please realize that God loves you ❤️ so much please rely on him and him ONLY to get you through this blessings to you all and stay prayed up 🙏🏾 this is a great video btw thank you so much!
Ah, the soulmate connection... have you ever felt it with a narcissist?
No, don't really believe in the concept, I'm very weary of people who try and force emotional connections too soon before they really know you as a person from all aspects. It's a false narrative they are spinning and like you said it's based on mirroring and keeping hidden their true self in the beginning.
i don't doubt it is a soul mate. Soul mates are not just positive mates. They can be negative as well because I did learn a lot of myself and even his darkness was a gift.
Most definitely! That’s why I gave in so fast & fell so hard!!!
@@azraelslight I can't help wondering how many other "soulmates" he has?
Yep! Worst five months of being deluded and accepting his shitty conflicting uncaring behaviour
I needed to hear this so much right now! As a teenager, I remember saying to my mom that maybe not everyone's soulmate is their lover, maybe for some it's a friend and I thought my best friend was my soulmate. I need to find the video about trauma bond because I think that will really resonate with me. I definitely agree about the mirroring. I'm starting to realize when I'm missing her, I'm missing the person she mirrored back to me.
I very early on believed he was my soulmate. Like within a week. I wanted to believe it so badly. I am 44 and thought it was my time.
It’s your time to shine 🥰
If feeling that this individual is “familiar”, actually treats you the way your close relative did in your childhood (my father was mine), then YES, s/he can be your “soulmate”.
Most of us require ourselves to heal childhood wounds. By being with a toxic abuser, the familiarity allows us to learn about our ways of being with this individual, and to help us move away from abuse and to heal our selves.
I don’t condone abuse of any kind. I know that being with the toxic ex taught me to honor and respect my SELF, and to find help along the way to HEALING.
Will I go back to him? Short answer: NO! (Longer answer: if I couldn’t convince him in THIRTY [30] years that I loved him and that he would be safe with me, there was no way I could stay another second with him!)
“Soulmate” for learning the lessons for healing? YES!
“Soulmate” for loving, living with, and growing old with? NOPE! NOPE! NOPE!
Blessings!❤️
A lot of narcs actually are using this card now and will tell many different women that they ARE their soul mates or even twin flames. For women who believe in this it’s an immediate hook!
The Narcissist as "Hero"?? They impact many people throughout their life, hurting them but in reality these people they hurt need the lesson, so they are sacrificing their life to be of service to others?? I'm being a bit sarcastic, but it could be true! I think my mother was an alcoholic narcissist, and then I married one at 18 which led to a long line of bad relationships after my divorce. I recently "woke up", after my second divorce from (I think) a covert narcissist, and then right after realized my grown son is a covert narcissist! I can't tell you the pain it all caused me, but everything became crystal clear. All my confusion about some things my son said or did over the years made sense now. The lack of empathy, the blank stare, the hurtful snide comments. I feel like I've been broken into pieces and spirit is now rebuilding me.
As I awoke the other day I heard, "You are an empath and a healer". I was a nurse for many years. Now I see narcs in my life in technicolor whereas before I made excuses for them, or was just confused... cognitive dissonance. Karmic contracts are real. I thank them and forgive them ...(well, working on it) ...for it all, because I needed it for growth. I'm now looking for my soul tribe as I'm pretty much alone and cannot rely on anyone. My lesson was to love myself, prioritize myself, have boundaries. Still learning every day. Why did it take so long, I'm a senior now... it takes as long as it takes. ♥ p.s. new subscriber.
Yes I did. It was like a spell. Once it broke, there was nothing left.
Totally...like a spell! The spell broke for me when friends alerted me to some incriminating facebook posts. Thank you for saying this. I feel like the spell was broken and I don't feel the same, and I know if I read his words... I could fall in love again... so I am rejecting his long letters...
Krista Olson Thanks but I got a little puzzled by what you wrote. Because the whole point of the spell breaking, is the realization that there was never anything nice and valuable, and it can never be. You know, my narc has made passionate hoovering attempts. I faced them the same way I face the love bombing of her current boyfriend, or the reminissence/invoking our “good old days”. With sardonic irony, and hardly containing a nervous laughter, as If I m at a funeral and notice a very silly wig worn by a mourner.
So true. I always thought I was a twin flame. It's not true
I never like to completely rule out the possibility of a twin flame connection, but it's HIGHLY unlikely. Otherwise, the narcissist would be twin flames with all their targets 🤷♀️
I thought exactly the same, twin flame and Narcissist present in the same way. Mirroring is a big one for both. Twin flame does the whole running thing as well which kinda fits the Narcissist so very easy to confuse the two.
Kunaal Uppal sameeeeee
Yeah....I was all consumed by this thought/concept for a while. Make you feel "unique to them" in a way.
Same. I thought it was a soulmate and twin flame connection. Then I got into tarot readings and that just messed up my mind even further. Be careful what you allow to enter your thoughts.
That is amazing- “when you are missing a narcissist - you are missing the good parts of yourself”. That how I felt, I was sending something like this, but I never verbalized it . You made it for me! This is incredible! I was like trying to explain as my internal feelings, my point of view my memories, that I am missing, reflection of the last through my soul. But it is really - missing my self, the best parts of myself.
You are so amazing! Thank you for not hiding your thoughts on twin flame/soulmate connections.
I needed this insight & knowledge so very much!
Thank you !
This was great! Let me explain, I was recently discarded by a narcissist. what has been bothering me though is that we're poly and she's married although I know the marriage itself has a few challenges. well, it was bothering me at first that this narcissist is able to maintain her relationship with her husband after discarding me. But, now I get it, her husband is a per her actually an extreme empath and based on what she says, he's also very codependent on her. He's going to be around with her and for her, but it isn't because she has a special love for him, it's because he wound up being her twin flame, and I ain't! This was exactly what I needed
I can so relate to this. I got cheated on and deceived and lied to when myself and everyone around me thought I had the fairytale. He completely regretted it and was so so sorry but when we got back together, he became emotionally abusive and more controlling. I believe the cheating gave him that level of control and he didn’t have it any more. I had to go no contact as his words would pull me back in again and take me right back but he never changed. My ex used to throw around the twin flame and soulmate word, so early on too. I think my ex loved me ( he proposed to me and we were getting married) but he doesn’t have the ability to love in a healthy way. All I know is, in my life I’ve never felt a connection like I had and I’m so scared Of never having that again.
ME TOO - EXACTLY what you are saying. If I never feel that way again in my life, I feel like that will be the ultimate sadness.
This is an original and thought-provoking video, thanks! I don't believe in soulmates, but a lot of people do and feel the narc as their soulmate. I'm thankfully aware now, so in my most recent experience with a new narc who tried to reel me in, I noticed the following:
His first attempt had a humorous sexual flavour ("so am I going to be punished?"). He then tried very hard to spot a weak 'entrance' into me, for example he showed me a variety of different device wallpapers, on different days that is ("isn't this baby lovely?", "oooh I love whales"). This was in a mix-and-match combination with a variety of serious sob stories from his life, and also with flirty 'accidental' touches, and looking at me straight in the eyes, with sort of puppy eyes. Thoughout this whole performance, I was sweet, smiley, polite, but not really reacting to any of the above, just waiting to see if he was actually going to ask me out. No! he didn't! and in the end he just disappeared. Note here that he had already told me he has a girlfriend, who, however, "he's having serious problems with". Textbook or what!
I hope your channel grows this was very educational.
Thank you 🙏❤
I've always liked the fantasy of soulmates and twin flames. I have found this belief keeps you in relationships that aren't good for you a lot longer than you would if you didn't hang on to the fantasy. This fantasy is now shattered, I'm looking at life and people from a realistic point of view from now on. The intense feelings when you meet someone, the coming home feeling is an illusion, wanting something so bad your mind creates this fantastical reality and ignores all the realistic incompatabilities.
True. What makes things worse in my case is this person was chosen by my soul to wake me up spiritually to things like angels, what's real versus fake, spirituality. And so I had a few spiritual healers tell me he is a soulmate, but I tested him too early, or I was too "messed up" that he didn't want to deal with me. And that I loved him. So that additional programming fed my trauma bonding even more, rather than me get sectioned and get mental health support that I truly deserved at the time. I had another spiritual person tell me he is the twin flame, and I latched onto that false theory for years and years - and totally obsessed by him, not realising I also had negative entities and energies in my field that were ensuring I lost the impetus to heal my own life and succeed in life. Energy and years got sucked away, and this person was married and happily so, not wanting anything from me.
So we need to be aware that we are unconsciously neglecting our own growth and happiness when we run after a narcissist.
I had no idea I was Codependent until last year, and that I had been attracted to all people with narcissistic traits, including my parents and family and friends and healers with little integrity - because that's how compromised my mind has has been for 14 years.
May we all break from the shackles of pain and suffering and trauma in the best ways possible and ASAP.
Your life is so worthy of a full heart connection with your Creator and with yourself first. 💖
I used to have laughing fits during the love bombing phase. I couldnt figure it out. I have never in my life had experienced such a thing being around someone. I would fall down on the ground laughing my head off and hed just stand there looking at me with a smirk on his face.
No such thing as a soul mate. It's just a label people put on a partner to feel secure, like an extra layer of protection based on fear of being abandoned. People who believe in soul mates are exactly the perfect targets for narcissists. Realise there are literally millions of people you can have a special connection with and forget that soul mate nonsense
That and..."other lifetimes"? The video creator just casually drops this as an explanation for soulmates. Poetic, sure, but not provable as far as I can see.
correct, no such thing as a soul mate. It is a romantic fantasy that is all.
@@cindys9491 I noticed that too!
I think you are right. I fell deeply in love with my ex but he then randomly ghosted me for life problems and yeah broke my heart into little pieces. And now I love him despite him being out of my life.
3 strong "loves", a few crushes, several bad characters, a bout of psychosis, depression, 2 years of CBT: After 10 years I think Im getting to the last stage of grief: acceptance. He "loved" me sort of- but we didnt have a great connection- except for me picking up on his vulnerability that was really just his crippled cowardly self. All tenderness was on my end. And I just got hooked by trauma. There wasnt much special happening. I know now. But I do miss the highs. Now that Im wise to it I repel predators- or at least see them quickly, but sadly I dont drawn in anyone healthy. I still find man-children who want me to do everything and are apathetic or I meet smart witty charmers who are wicked and broken. I hate it. I just work and go to school and live my life. Naturally I am a loner although I am very popular at work and school. Nothin ever evolves even with my effort. People are different these days and Im not often what people want. But Im glad I dont get drawn in with bad characters. That stuff is soul-stompingly painful
My heart breaks so much- however, all the knowledge is power & I learn more & more every day!
You said this so well- i thought she was my soul mate bc of the trauma bond..bc i also went back after abuse and covert cheating... Not my soulmate, but she may have been my twin flame. So much coincidence and connection... And I like the idea that can't be soulmate bc of incapability of love... Can't believe you mentioned the soul contract. That was definitely the case . I felt it many times
So true. People used to tell me he is bad news but my response was always: I know what I know. I know him better than anyone else and you don't see the truth like I do. Even when he treated me sssooo badly I just couldn't stay away because I believed in some secret amazingness within him that only I knew of.
OH MY GOD....!!!!!!!!!! I have told him since week 2 "I KNOW you." and "You KNOW me" and then he started saying that too. And I am still in contact (week 5). I feel like I see the truth under the craziness of it all... he still is treating me well, I'm in the love bombing phase, but cerebral narcissism is on my radar BIG TIME. I am spending hours watching youtube videos and reading the comments to fortify myself and prepare myself for inevitably having to go no contact before the beautiful part even is over.
Kristen don't let it go too far. I studied psychology and STILL fell for the tricks. Narcs are amazing manipulators. Somewhere inside me I knew something was wrong but I listened to the tiny bit in me that told me otherwise. And it cost me an extremely high price. Not only did I lose serious amounts of money but also my family.
Oops, I got your name wrong. Sincerely sorry Krista
@@Corne79 Thank you - I am blocking his email as we speak (saw I had a youtube comment so I was eager to read it - for encouragement of course!). THANK YOU SO MUCH, SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!
You are spot on ... thank u for breaking it down
im surprised you haven't met a soulmate! your so wise and beautiful!
Sooooooooo mind blowing!!!! This makes so much sense to me!!!”
The reason I feel he is, is because while dating I did our astrology chart just to make sure I wasn’t wasting my time with someone who wasn’t compatible with me. I wanted to listen to the universe this time instead of relying on my own judgment that’s been pretty poor over the years....
The chart was a 10 out of 10 compatibility wise! literally, I’ve done charts for self and many others. it’s always been some negative aspects with some positive aspects, which would seem normal because everyone is different, but never in my life had I read a chart that was 100% positive aspects! It said I would be with a Scorpio & him a virgo! It even said we might get married!!!!!!!!!! 🤯
I’ve done numerology & I read “the pattern” ... it says our souls are traveling in the same direction and by teaming together we will accomplish our life purposes! also that Im here to make him “grow up” , face reality, and evolve. 🤦🏽♀️
As you can see... This is confusing as hell because now I feel like it is indeed a destined soul mate situation. And The universe brought us together to teach us divine lessons. I’m not saying I can “fix him” but I do have a higher understanding of his conquests to find real love and purpose. Almost as though his inner compass is weeding through people propelling him towards his most powerful transformation.
So in a nutshell, I’m like what in the hell does this all mean!???? Why would the universe tell me a covert narc is perfect for me if he can’t be helped. I don’t want to trauma bond my whole life! I just want love too! Help!!! 😩
This!!!! This is what I struggle with so much...
Omg!! I don't want this kind of disfunction in my life.Are there no guys left that can't have a normal relationship?!? 😱😮🤐
Always wondered what the soul mate/twin flame meant
Definitely been dealing with a twin flame 🔥
I really like your channel, very informative.
Thank you!
I do believe it is a soulmate situation & this is why... when we were dating I did our astrology chart as to let the universe lead and not pick relationships based off my own judgment as it has been pretty poor in the past 🥴
The reading compatibility wise was a 10 out of 10! Which had blown me away because I am used to doing charts for self and many others and I never seen that before. Usually they come with some positive aspects and some negative aspects, which I thought made sense seeing that everyone is different, but our particular chart had 100% positive aspects. It said he would be with a Virgo and I a Scorpio! it even said we could get married!!!
Not only that, I also read our numerology and the “pattern app”. It said our souls were traveling in the same direction and by teaming up together we would encourage each other to fulfill our life purposes!!!! It also said I am here to make him grow up, face reality, and evolve while he is here to make me accept my shadow self & feel at home in my own body.
So Yes, he discarded me and it hurt to my core as I’ve never experienced anything like that before but it taught me a very valuable lesson. It forced me to look at my codependency, self love deficit, & the parts of myself I had rejected my whole life. It was like a magical initiation where I tore myself down to rebuild stronger than ever! I realized my worth! 🙏🏽 Upon my climb to success I believe my rising will be his ultimate lesson to raise his frequency or miss out on the life of his dreams!
I guess the way I view him from a higher understanding, is that he’s sort of viciously weeding through people out of desperation to find love and fulfillment. As if an internal compass will stop at nothing to get him where he needs to go in life because there, I believe, he’ll meet his ultimate transformation as I did.
So in a nutshell I’m sure you can see why this is confusing as hell. Lol I literally sit back and say what does this all mean and why would the universe tell me that a narcissist is perfect for me?! Especially if he can’t be changed! Am I a narc too? Lol jk ... maybe 👀😂 I am a believer that nothing is impossible and that Spirit works in mysterious ways beyond our human understanding. I just want to make sure I’m not trauma bonding for the rest of my life expecting him to evolve either! I have learned the importance of self love but it’d be nice to receive real external love too!! help! lol
Unfortunately I can relate with each and every word. Your videos have huge healing power, I can not thank you enough for them - kinda lifesavers. xoxo
Your channel helps me so, so much. Thank you.
I see it now as "a trauma bond". It started wonderful until she started the screaming, bashing, blaming, and I bought it.
Love your videos and the help and guidance you provide.. Thanks a lot
They play nice in the beginning but as time goes on the true vibrations start to show then it's not long before it turns to soul sickness ..
Damn if this is not true..... I was recently duped so hard by a girl and then cheated on. It really is a sucky feeling.
Twin flame is what I always thought we were . He has done nearly everything possible to make me hate him. But I don’t. And I have dated many men I do give many chances but once someone says they are done with me I move on with quickness . He has said he’s done as well as discarding me without saying anything ! And I still have to get him back every time . I’m so addicted to this man .but I really feel like he’s made for me . I don’t know if he’s a narcissist , my dad is , and he’s not completed like my dad. He has hardly ever said anything flat out mean to me. He’s just never satisfied . Every time we doing good in my eyes he leaves
My npd ex also had many addictions - supply, sex, alcohol, adventure etc...
Holy shit this makes so much sense now...
Understatement of the century: “Soulmates” Who Were Never Meant To Be
I wish I knew all of this earlier.
Yes, i still feel a narcissist is my soul mate. Im repeatedly being told that ours' is a Divinely Guided deep soul connection. But its possible that the narc doesn't pay attention to his higer self "
Karmic twin.... felt the same re mine till she tried t steal 20k!!!! From me after I refused hoover. That's not soul mate business
a soulmate wont break you.
The most HUGE difference NPD vs TF in the very beginning is :
NPD will MIRRORING the best part of you or reach THE SAME LEVEL as you to knocking your steel door to let them in so they could lovebombing you, while TF will realized the fact that they are A TOTAL OPPOSITE of you in SO MANY WAYS, and whether both you have so deep connection you both will always want to resist your connection because of too many differenciations.
And when the connection went further, you will feel NPD is just the Mr./Mrs. Right for you because they will showering love and presents a.k.a lovebombing you, while with TF there's none lovebombing. LOL. Instead you will started questioning yourself, because now you realized that your TF is so imperfect person with all of those scars, flaws, and elses that you NEVER even imagined you _could_ in love with.
Hoping that my soul mate would be the true love and so we would be able to offer support and unconditional love in abundance without it really being an effort means the narcastist could not have been the soul mate, I would hope not the twin flame but it does make sense of how meeting your twin flame could end in the same destructive manner as with narcastist relationships. Probably provoking narcastic behaviour from each other
I have had 2 siblings mirror me, female acquaintances - that is a clear red flag🚩🚩🚩🚩RUN!!!
You're awesome.
My narc exes def felt like soul mates. The first girl bonded with me over a specific genre of music. The second was an incredible listener. I am not sure what was real or fake. I was connecting to their false self mirroring. Neither was capable of real love.
i tell you the story/ i was predicted to meet a soulmate during some time. i have met a narcisstic guy and fell in love/ cause i thought he is my soulmate/ and i was 100% sure he is my twin flame and still kind of believe it. cause after he dumped me he start looking a lot older then before
What if we’ve all been narcissist at some poin in time
Christina you are my soul mate.
Narcissist’s are not born narcissist’s.. this is something that happens to them on their life’s journey. They are born with a pure soul and of course, there may be be a soulmate destined for them. I can’t agree with your assumption that ignores this fact.
Omg , I was still married with my ex when I met my narcissist. We moved in together after three months of knowing each other, I divorced with my ex after six months and married my narc after 9 months of knowing each other and straight away I get pregnant. It is so funny because I am highly inteligent and educated person with ability to read people. I am sorry to laugh at it because I know for most people it is tragic situation but it is really funny for me. It is ok , I am dealing with him with my own way, hope to survive. I am very self confidence person , not surprised I fall in Love with my mirror :p and I hope he will not be able to break this confidence :)
I can relate! Even highly intelligent, educated, successful, confident, "together" women can fall for narcissists' love bombing...
You're literally sat here confessing the fact that you gave up on your marriage with one man for another man and calling the other man a narc.
Im sorry..are you out of your mind?
Thats ridiculous.
Im struggling so much to let go of her. She hurt me so bad. And somehow i still miss her so much. What the hell is wrong me? I want this to be over. I too thought she was my soulmate. 💔
You are emotionally dependent, I hope 3 years later you are well, none of you deserve this
So if you finally get the nerve up to take a protection order out after 23 years and now your 14 year old daughter hates you and won't come home. I raised her, I stayed home with her and he has somehow manipulated my daughter to treat me the same way. In the beginning I was done but I saw him last week and now i am thinking I miss him and maybe he will change.....my heart is broken 💔 😢
I don't not feel or think that they are my soulmate. LOL they (flying monkeys) just stalk me all day and do noticeable things to show they are always illegally watching me, and raging at me, and trying to control everything I'm doing. Everyday. Non Stop. Many times when I go out to eat by myself, they'll send flying monkeys to act like they are eating with me. When I go to the movies by myself they'll send flying monkeys to surveil me and even cough at certain parts of the movie to communicate. When I play music and the song is saying something sweet they'll slam a car door or resort to some type of noise. When I'm watching a movie and the movie says something like, "But I love you" they'll slam a car door or make some type of noise. This is covert communication but its really lies. When they do stuff like I just explained it;s because they don't want anything good to resonate with you unless they have something to do with it. Even if they don't love you and care about you. Keep in mind I stay alone and this is me getting stalked and harassed from a distance. Remotely. They would even make the fridge make these popping noises when they feel I should be eating. They'll even do things like slam car doors as soon as I'm done watching a movie, or slam car door when song go off, or slam car door when I'm done typing. Harassing me with triggering noise. And if they want to harass me with noise after a song goes off and I replay the song, they would send a car coming back to back to back to back until they get to do the tactic they want to do to me at the time they wanted to do it. LOL. pathetic. And the longer I go without eating they make the fridge make louder noises. Very obnoxious, controlling stalkers. It's all unwanted on my end. And the more they do this i see the more they start feeling entitled. Some people are actually married and actually staying with people like this, and that's sad. I'm glad I'm not married and staying alone. There's times when I was sleeping in my car and they'd wait til i wake up and crank their car on when they saw me get out the car or sit up straight. Or they'd wait until I was falling asleep and shine there headlights on my car. Although isolation is what they want so they can treat you wrong and no one would believe you but its being more clear how these narcs operate. So I don't mind being alone until things really turn back in GOD'S FAVOR View my instagram @tsktskteaser
I don't believe in souls mates. No one is destined to anyone for eternity. We must love who we allow into our life with our best self, but every connection will end one day.
Yikes! Noooo!
How do you know EXACTLY when to post these vids?!?
Romance movies and books don't help with any of this--tons of trauma and drama plays out as true love... wish they could show a healthier model in modern art.
Great vid but imo soulmates are not always romantic! Everyone has a soulmate in their life! Friends, family, indeed love! They are those in your soul family you chose to incarnate with for various lessons/missions etc not the disney romantic definition of 'soulmates' in mainstream consciousness. Narcs' i think are most likely soulmates as soulmates are here to teach you lessons you are not necessarily meant to end up romantically involved! So soulmates imo can be in your life for 1 week or 10yrs! Twins are a whole other kettle of fish! Twins have that pull and ultimate mission which is why they are incarnating now! high frequency souls. With twins i feel it is not a case of falling in love but remembering that love!😋 it is deeeeep haha. I cannot imagine a narc' being a twin if the capacity for heart centred love is absent! but these are just my observations and understanding of it all! So not concrete fact lol💗
Great point, and I actually agree. I should have said "romantic soulmate." Thanks for your comment! 🙏❤
I don’t believe in narcissism at all I do believe in childhood trauma and how every parent in our life has messed each of us up. I’ll take a listen to this video and see how I can talk to my boyfriend about this. He mirrors me when it comes to food. We both mirror each other. He doesn’t share my interests at all just mirrors me when it comes to food or if I say “I like how you used to have a beard” next time I see him he has a beard. Lol! 🤦🏽♀️ So creepy but so sexy to. Not gonna lie. Lol!
I have a bad trauma bond with this guy it sucks. What’s weird is that I trashed him online then deleted it. 🤔🤷♀️ I think if I work on my childhood trauma from my parents I can break this soul tie but it’s been hard.
Crap, I thought she was a soul mate and we were SO MEANT TO BE TOGETHER. The only connection, was I let her trick me. BTW she's Covert and all the traits fit her perfectly. Sadly there's absolutely no way to have a successful relationship with her and I fell in love with her. She convinved me I was the bad guy, I did everything wrong. My head has been so messed up, I have had to talk to other women, I have no relationship with, tell them first what I did wrong so I could get unbias feedback, they told me how ridiculous and crazy my wife acts. I let her bash me for so long, I forgot I'm a pretty nice guy.
Damn, I felt mine was my soulmate 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 she just faked my ideal partner for 3 months
Agree narcissist can never be a soul mate they have no sence of self awareness. This is why they mirror us. We they are reflecting us back to us this is why they seem like "our soul mates" lol 😆 had to Crack up on this video this should give you amo to move on down the road.
There is no such thing as a soulmate. Love is hard work and you're not going to find anybody where it all just falls into place. Our generation grew up on Disney and it shows.
The sad part is you fell in love with this person, because you shared all the same intellectual and entertainment pursuits. You really made a connection that way including great sex with that it all had to be spoiled by his behavior. This is what you grieve is the good stuff if your guy was not a total sociopath, but basically a decent person who didn’t help you did you do things for you? I didn’t support you, but he has that one little 5% Can I control his temper and outbursts and that you don’t know what he’s upset about takes it out on you.
Its a KARMIC connection
And may be the twin flame connection it self is a meth and my twin flame is in fact is a narcissist and mad me her salve
No, I don't think hes my soul mate, actually I don't think I really believe in Soulmates. But I do know that I still love him and want to be with him regardless of all of the bad mouthing he's done of me.. or the fact that he had me evicted from his house in a court of law last summer.. I feel like the stupidest woman alive because nothing he does is ever the final straw for me even when I think it is. I keep feeling like WHEN am I going to have my ENOUGH moment?
Hey, you're not stupid, it's never the victim's fault, you're emotionally dependent, so everything he does to you you'll still feel that you "need him" or that "love him" I hope you're well after these years after your comment
Not to be contrary, but since “soul mate” does not have a scientific definition, it is difficult to say who is and who is not one. I mean, I believe we have more then one soul mate. And sometimes we don’t stay with them, for whatever reason. I think it is strange to think our soul mates must have good intentions or that our relationships with them will be good and healthy. Maybe your soul mate is just an asshole in this life lol. Perhaps they will learn something or fulfill a karmic debt. Who knows. That said, you shouldn’t stay with someone who is toxic even if you think/feel they are your soul mate. I hope I explained what I am thinking well. It is hard to do in text.
If they are mirroring you wouldn't that mean you are the narcissist.
No, because I was talking about the idealization phase and not abuse.... but I suspect you already knew that 🤔
My gf was hot. She got fat. I dumped her. Whole story
Soulmates is made up
Yup, she was the literal best…until she wanted to provocate false derogatory narratives on my character and coerced a ruined relationship. They think you’re perfect…until they devalue you you. It’s all them.
Imagine you’re completely oblivious and you fall in love with a person that is a loveless parasitic human filth 😖
They were your soul mate…until they got a new soul mate
I mean a soul connection isn’t necessarily a good thing. Like when it’s with a narcissist. 🥴