@@jack41396 That doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. It’s not comparing someone to anything to point out they speak French. That’s just factual information lol
You forgot the most key part. Celly by drinking out of the goalie's bottle when you score on him and spitting it in his face. Always leads to a good time had BY ALL.
***** Every single game's handshake: "Good game. Good game. Good game. Good game. Fuck you. Good game. Good game. Lucky ass. Good game. Douche. Good game."
one time I was playing hockey when I was like 6 and I just gave up in the middle of the game I sat down on the ice and didn't get up until the game was over.
I think what makes this even better is that there are actually some decent tips in there, like taking shots every day, stopping/tight-turning etc., so it looks legit..and there are probably any number of innocent rookies out there watching this and taking notes haha
Great video, I think the most fun and final step is to relive the entire game after the game up in the bar and laugh at how slow the players look on the ice in the game after yours. There's no way we're that slow, right?
I’ve been “playing” hockey for about a year and a half but I’ve never enrolled in a league, but now I have and my first game is tomorrow. I had to come back to this video
Ironically, I was mentioning this exact thing to my Finnish wife, a big hockey fan, in November, about all of these current and upcoming goalies from Finland, after I was looking at the prospects from different NHL teams, along with other players from Finland. Impressive. I wish them all well and hope they prosper in the NHL. Cheers to the legendary Teemu Selanne as well. Retiring after this season. I'd like to see him win another cup with the Ducks to close out his hall of fame career. Class act that guy.
Yeah, I played three games Jr. B and had a beauty gino, t-dragged some plug d-man and niped cheddar with my clap bomb, then the fuckin' bush league zebra threw me in the box for cellying to hard.
hahahah
"Good game. Good game. Good game. Fuck you. Good game. "
Been there!
Pavel Barber hey pav
omg pav!
Pavel Barber I did that once
Pav did not see you commin.
Me too
“Google me, three games Junior B”😂😂
3:27
"I've heard better chirps from a dead bird." *i am dead.*
so is the bird
You’re the bird?
0:32
you might have forgotten "The one, shooting so high, that everyone is afraid to screen the goalie"
I love this fucking comment so much. Every team has that one asshole
@@gavinthegamer4934 in my Team it was me😂
In my team MOST of the forward players shoot high, VERY high. And I hate screening the goalie,. I'm slowly plotting their demise ...
Shooting high in front of the players or in general?
Dennis Spengler as a goalie this is equally not fun
Always get the French guy as mad as possible. Yes, even if he’s on your team.
Lmfao 😂
@@DeepDiveHockey year late bud
Omg stop to say that we are French, it’s like if we compare you to Americans
@@jack41396 That doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. It’s not comparing someone to anything to point out they speak French. That’s just factual information lol
you mean from Quebec?
I've been playing hockey all my life and this video is the dead truth
true
even apple
+JM Lacrosse what is apple i have played hockey my entire life and i have NO idea
+I Cutey assist
Awwww thx D_james04
You forgot the guy who never comes off the ice with his line.
Fucking hate that guy or the defence man that think he is bobby Orr and always rushes and never passes
So true
THATS MEEE! I'm just great
Thats me
And the guy who comes of the ice way before the rest of his line
Instructions not clear, I became canadian
Oxymorphone after playing hockey for a year I was full Canadian *eh*
what's this aboot?
I Am Canadian
That's a good one
The greatest form of therapy is to take out your frustrations on the refs.
can confirm
3:08 r.i.p. Kobe
Had so much fun shooting this. Thanks IFHT for letting me help! You guys did an amazing job!
Thanks Cole! You were born an ever-so-bright shining star
+IFHT great vid. but that comment to your friend, i hope is funny locker room shit. akward or cole is ill and im an idiot. keep your stick on the ice.
+Andrew B my nhl won't save how do I fix this
+Beefbrother if they dont find you handsome, should find you handy.
0:56 omg that made me laugh so hard it’s just the way he said it 😂😂
“Learn how to stop”
Proceeds to turn
"Get off your knees, you're blowing the game" That's funny!
Played hockey all my life. This video is great! Everything is so true especially the last one in the handshake line. Classic
Now this video is a beaut!
Ya got that right bud
Can you make how to be a hockey player #2? You guys do a great job and I love hockey. I would love to see another one
How to be a hockey player part 2:
Fight everybody like there's no tomarrow.
Celly by drinking out of the goalie's bottle when you score on him.
Celly drinking out of the goalie's bottle by having your nose broken by a blocker.
Worth it
Lol then get a unsportsmanlike like Brendan Leipsic
You forgot the most key part.
Celly by drinking out of the goalie's bottle when you score on him and spitting it in his face. Always leads to a good time had BY ALL.
Zachhhx very worth it man
Such an iconic video, whenever this pops up on my recommended page never skip it
Ive seen coupons save more than you, ive seen a dead bird chirp better😂😂😂
Revo Kuivjõgi wow you can’t spell either talk the talk but can’t walk the walk
Sarah Ray Everytime I score, WHERE DID TGE PUCK GO?!!! Ppl get pissed at me
shrek wazowski I’ve heard better roast from a dead bird
@@koozy613 yeah lets just completely ruin the original chirp by replacing a word and making the chirp not make any sense.
@@koozy613 You mean you've gotten better roasts out of a road-killed cow.
"I've heard better chirps from a dead bird" lmao😂
Step #31 Dont forget the goalies. Yeah there weird but hey, there goaloes.
+Scott Jagunich call any one with goalie equipment a friend
Yeah we exist
Wow
call everyone "boys"
Cause hockey is #fortheboys
Jarrod Persinger You mean boyz 😂😂😂😂🏒🥅
even my all girls team calls each other boys... so
Yeah dude I’m a girl and when other girls go hey THERES A GIRL HERE NOT JUST BOYS I back up like eyy the boys out number us let him just say boys
“alrighty boys..... and girl.....”
Step four, you forgot the infamous try hard, the speed demon, and the one who never runs out of energy
And the bender
And the guy who can skate pretty fast but always shoots the puck over the net
2:24 - Welcome to the club, buddy!
use hockey talk at the dinner table, such as "hey mom sauce me the peas you fucking beaut"
"fuckin google me" dead
Don't be the guy at drop-in with a full on replica NHL jersey.
personM4N y
Bp productions because you look like a fucking ass
personM4N Uhhhhh...
Lol I did that once. Only cause the penguins wemt to the Stanley Cup
personM4N I do that and I’m in bantam
"I've heard better chirps from a dead bird" is my new favourite chirp
2:17 Jaromír Jágr and Czech flag
"The soccer player" OMG I'm dying. I have played soccer for 10 years, but that was incredibly accurate
Hey guys! Check out our latest video "How To Be A Hockey Player"!!
The ending killed me, "F*** You" lmao.....thanks for that man....that was a Beaut of a Vid haha
***** Every single game's handshake: "Good game. Good game. Good game. Good game. Fuck you. Good game. Good game. Lucky ass. Good game. Douche. Good game."
*****
I'm the goalie that chirps a guy chirps me I chirp his chirp
+JarrettTheGoalie chirpception
Lol. Ive heard better chirps from a dead bird
Ur not Cpt. Obvious we all heard it in the video if we Aachen the whole video dumbass
whats up your ass man. Chill. Go to your happy place.
From my dead bird*
*birds chirping in the distance*
Get REEEEEKKKKKTTTTT
The thing about the tape is true. I am always the only person with tape.
I know right! I literally have an extra roll with a bunch of little tiny peices on it. I’m an asshole lol
“AlL CoMe On ReF yOu SPiLeD mY BeEr”
You missed "don't be a bender"
That's the most important one
kawaii dreamer good one
LOL, in NHL 2K7, Bob Cole actually pronounces it Alexender Semin's last name Semen.
Haha health class days
Another one is Montreals backup goalie Mike Condon - too many people pronounce it Condom.
aa
The good ol days
this deserves to be one of the highest viewed videos on youtube! i'm in fucking tears! this is so on point!
I love coming back to this video once a year or so. Also rip Kobe
one time I was playing hockey when I was like 6 and I just gave up in the middle of the game I sat down on the ice and didn't get up until the game was over.
"Hey tendie i've seen more saves on a coupon". "I've heard better chirps from a dead bird" LOL
It is a truth universally acknowledged that someone will always - ALWAYS - wear yellow skate laces.
The tape, also the tape.
Gerhard Symons That would be me. 😅
Ovechkin
0:02 That text box though
I KNEW I WASNT THE ONLY ONE WHO SAW IT AHAAH
"If you can fight, you can play hockey"
-Somebody who has never seen ice in person but freaking loves hockey (Aka me)
I think what makes this even better is that there are actually some decent tips in there, like taking shots every day, stopping/tight-turning etc., so it looks legit..and there are probably any number of innocent rookies out there watching this and taking notes haha
Be sure to always call your teammates "boys."
So true! I'm always considered one of the boys!
2:52 can't get more true than that hahahaha
Great video, I think the most fun and final step is to relive the entire game after the game up in the bar and laugh at how slow the players look on the ice in the game after yours. There's no way we're that slow, right?
I’ve been “playing” hockey for about a year and a half but I’ve never enrolled in a league, but now I have and my first game is tomorrow. I had to come back to this video
Possibly the greatest video on TH-cam
you forgot to say to the ref "I've seen better refs at foot locker" and when somebody's hogging ice "must be nice to skate"
“Bonus points if you say *Kobe* “
That hit *hard*
fight at every whistle
IFHT vids are pretty much always great. but this one is my favorite.
still watching this in 2016
watching this in 2019
How to be a hockey goalie step 1: Be a Finn
For sure! Tuukka Rask is my favorite Finnish net minder.
Just read an excellent article about "Urpo Ylonen" an old goaltender from Finland, that has literally changed the face of how goaltending is played.
arkansaswookie I've read it. It was a fantastic article.
Ironically, I was mentioning this exact thing to my Finnish wife, a big hockey fan, in November, about all of these current and upcoming goalies from Finland, after I was looking at the prospects from different NHL teams, along with other players from Finland. Impressive. I wish them all well and hope they prosper in the NHL. Cheers to the legendary Teemu Selanne as well. Retiring after this season. I'd like to see him win another cup
with the Ducks to close out his hall of fame career. Class act that guy.
Don't forget Noora Raty, too.
2:16 Czech republic flag? I am so proud! :DD
4:10 me when I lose a game
4:09
+
Hey fellow hockey player and raifan
As someone who plays all the time this is the finest video I've ever seen
Hilarious
I've played hockey my entire life , this is all 100% acurate
30 reasons why i love hockey!
is it really hard to say pekka rinne as english?
Much Doge no, cal clutterfuck
m3ntl3g3n no its peck a ruin ae..
not that hard
m3ntl3g3n not for me
No its actually quite easy.
Gd
4:29 So relatable LOL
Ben Shasky got me
The handshake part at the end is 100% spot on.
Beauty vid! Just added it to our playlist :)
I think some people missed the tongue-in-cheek joke about pronouncing players' names
0:02 you forgot to remove the keypoint things with the green dots
Disjointed Salad Jesus Christ man relax, he’s just giving criticism
Just Another Jurassic Park Fan na fam he deserves it
(Jk)
Letterkenny makes so much more sense now
This channel is making me want to move to canada
theres nothing that feels better then getting on the ice straight after the zamboni finishes
Most important : Be Canadian
Morl0ck77 trueeee
Nooo sweden man world champs 2 Times’ ina row
Be Russian
Андрей Семёнов ever seen Miracle?
Exqueez me sir but I'll ya that I am American and I love hockey.
Tomorrow is the 3 year anniversary of this video
hey look, today is the 3 year anniversary of this video
Grape Juice III not one year. Three years
PENSFAN _8771 fuck
You forgot how hard it is to pronounce Jonathan Toews name 😂😂
This is my favourite video on youtube
"Hey tendy I've seen my mom save more than you with coupons " " does she buy cookies with them and hide them on the top shelf where you can't reach"
Yeah, I played three games Jr. B and had a beauty gino, t-dragged some plug d-man and niped cheddar with my clap bomb, then the fuckin' bush league zebra threw me in the box for cellying to hard.
You forgot the Chewers. Grinders, dusters. The guy that never passes. And mr sorry
3:08
rip kobe
1:33 looks like Adam Lowry LOL
I've played hockey since I was 3 years old and Step 20 is BY FAR the most accurate statement to ever exist since Newtonian Physics.
1:27 is this guy adding another layer of tape to his stick
He is too Distracted talking about Junior B 🤣🤣
You forgot to mention the word of Don Cherry is infallible. Follow his lead.
I always mute the TV when that fucker comes on
wtf is wrong with u lol
Grape's word is law
The Mr. Pete Channel needs 700 subs! Are you have rarted
Forgot the beer in the penalty box.
Ref's lucky day
I was trying to eat cereal but I was laughing too hard lol😂
The sixth anniversary of this how to be a (blank) what a legend this video is
Well, let's just say you forgot everything about goalies. But that was about the normal amount of inclusion we get.
"Shit Backup Goalies Say" check that one out
They could add this: "whenever your a goalie and get scored on, completely rage. You will for then on be an official member of the Tukka Rask fan club
Raidergator *Tuukka Rask *you're completely, i have seen him rage 3 times when he has let goals in, and 2 of them shouldn't count.
The Duppe I have no idea what you just said.
Raidergator Reading the message should help a bit
Pekka Rinne is from finland omg torilla tavataan❤️😎
salainen puurokauha you mean tortilla land
@@macrodic1898 tortilla?
Pineapple pie t-o-r-t-i-l-l-a l-a-n-d
@@macrodic1898 www.tortillaland.com/ Mehiko !
"Good game... good game... fuck you... good game." Yup, I'm using that
Hahaha this was spot on!!!! Great job!
Dude... by now I can follow this video by heart
In the handshake be like:
Good game
Good game
Good game
You suck
Good game
You gotta go bardownsky
You missed one, having a Canadian accent😂
Shockingly accurate. This is ESPECIALLY true for high school and college
I love how he says the names of the hockey players.
"fuckin google me. 3 games junior b."
I fucking swear everything in this video is exactly me
Michael Aron saaaame
Michael Aron your the bender
I miss hockey
Also this video is so true
I love how it gets progressively more chaotic
4:08 there's always that one person that I want to do that to in the soccer line.