Gastor Almonte - Brooklyn Batman - This Is Not Happening - Uncensored
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 เม.ย. 2017
- Gastor Almonte's cousins freak him out with their Joker mask, so he takes matters into his own hands.
Watch full episodes of This Is Not Happening now: www.cc.com/shows/this-is-not-h...
Follow Gastor Almonte on Twitter: / gastoralmonte - ตลก
Think your family is messed up? Think again. Watch comedians share their most ridiculous family stories on “This Is Not Happening:” th-cam.com/play/PLD7nPL1U-R5pgIBSOJV-fL4uIWR-DZbfI.html
Comedy Central Stand-Up it’s amusing how much y’all probably spend on the cringey pointless intros on this show. I always skip them lol.
Who cares not funny
Pataganja danny gonzalez
Mexican got on boots
Lol
Somebody call cici you gonna need knife
Practice the rock and lean
I just wayched that one
😂 I love the internet
"You know your father once stabbed somebody over snapple?" is quite possibly the best start to a bit I've ever heard lmao.
"Y'all crushing this parenting thing btw"...Beautifully adorable story. Props to dad.
"I was Michael Keaton fighting Michael Keaton" - brilliant
Indeed it is!
😂😂😂😂
"I was Alfred" 😭😭😭
Fire with fire lol
haha dude best comment ever
He's a master at set ups and pay offs. That's how comedy is done right.
You speak the truth sir.
i know! entirely true!!
👍👍
The pay off on that story was worth it. Emotional and humorous... invite him back again
Charles Gordon his story for next season is even better
He has a new one called reverse drive by.fillmed bout a week ago
So true
ashien miller I seen him do that in a bit before and it was hilarious, the best was when he was talking about the time he was on a ledge half naked talking to the cops.... guys hilarious
I love his dad! ❤️
"... I ain't solve that last one, but I was entertaining enough for Them to end it amicably" 😂😂😂
Fuckin r.i.p.
👍👍👍👍
"This my daughter's room."
"I know, you're welcome."
" that's the kid who thinks he's Batman " " no that kid is Batman "
🤣🤣🤣
"My 2+2 game was crazy."
Had to pause for a couple minutes while I proceeded to lose my shit.
Yeah bro... he four loko
explain
I lost it after he made a callback saying he had 3 + 3 next week
This guy is a comedian, but above that, he's a fantastic storyteller. Props to this young man.
Those are the best among all comedians!
Great story telling is the highest form of comedy imo. Keeping people's undivided attention is extremely difficult.
That's amazing. "Just make sure my son never wants to hang out with you". That's love right there.
Went to high school wit Gastor 💯he always been funny
OK...? Sure
@YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX cause it's extremely easy to lie on the internet
Hahaha I bet he was the class clown. It's always the bigger guys
Thats really cool!
fun kicks laughter and no education?
Doug Smith, Ali Siddiq, and Gastor Almonte are my favorites so far.
plus I AM THE MACHINE
Do It Fix It
Fuck that bitch this is rUsSIa
@@mkilic10 FUCK THE MACHINE that story is bullshit
u gotta see bombing in sears and cumin
The One Who Laughs agreed. Both much funnier than Bert’s dumb story. I just don’t think that man is funny. Never have, never will.
Him being a kid but talking as a grown man is hilarious 😂😂😂
This was actually a very beautiful story with great comedic delivery and joke writing. So glad I decided to click on it!
Why did you have to say actually is it hard to believe a black comedian could tell a beautiful clean story
Phillip Edwards he was probably not interested with the title but you don't have to bring race into it especially because he didn't say anything about his race.
Phillip Edwards he is fucking Hispanic you idiot!!! Stop struggling so hard to pull your overplayed race card out of your pocket loser.
@@roberttidwell7864 you realize you can be more than one race or ethnicity tho right
IMALEO93 yes I totally know and understand that, yet that isn’t the case here. My comment remains valid.
These intros need to lose funding
Ted _ FACTS
Yea those shits are trash
Right, I WAS NOT expecting that 😨
For real! Weird as shit. I don't want to watch the clip anymore
Seriously a waste of money and just get in the way of what we came for
You had me at snapple.
phattony32 FACTS
I second those Facts!!
Allen Ayler you just waisted your time!!! ; )
“THE RATCHET GASTOR, I KEEP A GUN IN EVERY HOUSE”😂😂😂
"I wasn't even scared of the joker i was scared of Beetlejuice." 😂😂😂
The Ratchet? I'm not a rapper. I don't know what that is? - dead
STLGOODS BEWARE. ...I guess I'm not a rapper either😕😅... Have to google it
I learned what a ratchet was from a future song
Got nothing to do with rap it's slang you stupid shit
if you not from the region or in that area where they use the slang you learn it from pop cultural i.e rap music you stupid shit.>,
nassim zway Well, he is just repeating exactlty what the comedian said in his story.... And we all know that the comedian said it to make fun of a stereotype... Which is something that comedians do all the time.
i love it.the way he calls his father his hero. it’s beautiful.
“You’re crushing this parenting thing by the way” lmao
Performed on the same show as Gastor at Comix at Mohegan Sun last year. Funny dude, super humble, and the dude can spit! Talented like a mufucka! Good shit Gastor! #respect
Lol his dad basically was the big villain behind the scenes after a wild plot twist 😂
Storytelling skills are on point, perfect timing too. 💯💯💯💯
BEETLEJUICE! Michael Keaton fighting Michael Keaton Hahahahaha! Rate this guy, never heard of him but Imma keep an eye out!
Gastor Almonte is the alias that Batman uses when he goes undercover in the hoods.
"damn yall crushing this parenting shit! keep it up!"
"Cuz when the joker laughs that means some crazy shit is about to go down"😂💀
definitely one of the top 3 stories ever on this show
yeah! Ali Siddiq. I've watched that one like 10 times lol
Not a simple comedian but a amazing comedy writer and story teller. nice one!!
Yep, Joey Diaz's story was pretty cool too!
Sean Patton's Cumin story is my favorite one. Maria Bamford's was really good too. Got me to watch her Netflix show Last Dynamite.
Yes
Gastor, brother we are waiting for a net flix special!!!!
I think his dad is more of "flashpoint series batman"
Justin Whu Thomas wayne
this killed me thank you lmao
We don't talk about his Pops ... no smoke wanted
this guy speaks like a poet. :)
Very dope story, could connect with this being a younger sibling seeing the "grown folks" doing their thing but keeping me distracted with activities..or having my brothers scare the shit out of me with costumes or teasing. Much respect keep grindin!
Who else always fast forwards to 1:00 so you don't spoil the punchline for yourself?
I've never actually heard of this dude before seeing this. I like him. He's real polished with his storytelling. Is he at the half hour special level or have CDs yet?
I hope my son can talk about me like that one day. Every kid should look at their dad as Batman
Yeah, we all want the same thing
How have I not heard of this guy? He's tremendous!
Tanpopo okayyy joey
Great dad. Well minus the gun in the daughters room lol. Sometimes directly telling a kid not to do something only tempts them to want to try it more, and they end up needing to learn for themselves the hard way. That was an incredibly thoughtful way for him to keep his son uninterested in ever wanting anything to do with gangbangers or drug dealers.
i’ve watched this video so many times now and it still makes me laugh. he is super funny and an amazing storyteller. by far my favourite one they should invite him again!!
Big Shout to East New York, my once upon a time home, Born and raised. Cypress Hills
"But this is my daughter's room."
"I know. Your welcome."
Props Gastor..congrats on making it to Comedy Central!
This guy and so many others doing these This Is Not Happening comedic storytelling series are SO GOOD!
Sorry but the Intro Of "The baby coming."
Has me terrified.😂
What a blessing to have a family like that. It’s so many amazing black fathers no one could ever touch their teaching style for their boys to men.
Excellent comedian. Insulted no particular group, was extremely funny, and told a great story. That is how you do it.
This might be one of the Greatest STORY EVER TOLD 😂😂😂💯💯👏👏 and the delivery was prolific👏👏👏👏
2+2 game is crazy!!, ain't nobody seeing me but 3+3 is next week!!!
I loved this set so much. His delivery and writing is incredible. his adlibs through out the set were perfectly placed.
Yo this guy is talented. Great storyteller.
They got a real shitty habit of scarin the shit outta me
You know, I've watched dozens of these but not a single one ever captivated my interest like this fine storyteller.
Gastor, this holds up as one of the best I've watched. It'd be dope to see you in my town.
THIS DUDE IS HILARIOUS!!!! THE END HAD ME DYING
This was beautiful. Beautiful and HILARIOUS!
I think the best part of this story is that he accidentally became just like Batman. In Batman begins they say he's gotta become what he fears to not be afraid and that's why he's a bat. This dude became Micheal Keaton to get rid of his fear of Micheal Keaton and didn't even know it
I loved this stand up from start to finish and after. 😭❤️
"I'm not scared of The Joker, I'm scared of Tim Burton movies." Hunny. Hilarious story, gotta show everyone this guy.
That Michael Keaton line was hilarious
This man story telling is on another level
That was the best story put to humor and made real by real life. Standing ovation from Texas.
Yoo lets get more of this dude real shit 😂💯
This guy.. for real ... we need more of him EVERYWHERE.
I can't be the only one that sees he is a straight king. Funny af, had a kid and wife young, got a real G dad that did his thing as a dad raising this king , he got property in flourishing Brooklyn and mans up... I see you 👑
This is hands down one of the best ones yet. in my top 3
He is so likable, wanna hear more from this guy!
I had to hang on for a moment leading up to the third part, but it was way worth it. Hilarious.
I can listen to this man talk all day.. 😍😍😍
This was a beautiful, heartwarming story that also happened to be funny. Wow!
Your dad knew the first place youd go in an emergency, your heart. Thats where id safely and securely and super openly with spouse etc put the ratchet in my house if i had a child too. Good dadding
Yup, like when your daughter hits the wall with her toy or during a tantrum and cuts herself. Or finds the gun and accidentally shoots a friend. Great parenting
Ir0n Zulu yeah you always got extra time to go grabbing stuff from the upstairs room under the heater - fast response time. Oh wait, you say these things can be portable? Maybe he should carry it
Never would have imagine there was another Real Batman out here. It's a blessing to have good parents ❤️
One of the best stories ever.bring him back!
this is how you tell a story
I want something easy like this parenting thing 😂😂😂. Amazing storytelling and super funny.
I love his stories about his dad lol.
Dope, he taught his son to be a business owner.
Dude is seriously an amazing story teller! 👏🏾👏🏾 Props big man!
Literally the best story I’ve ever heard
This guy needs a full on show, like an animated series about his life or something
I watched this thousand times and im still laughing 😂
this man did everything right. not many comedians can tell a captivating story that is both humorous and lands emotion especially not for a solid 10 minutes. i hope my guy is making business rn bc he’s showing what standup and comedy is about
Why am i barely finding this comedian right now? His story telling and delivery is insane.
This deserves an animation 😂😂😂
This man is a genius 💯💯😂😂
Wow he funny as hell🤣😂🤣😂 I like when a comedian is funny without being loud and over the top! Loving this guy!!
I honestly just love his voice... ☺️
Wow you pretty......r u single?
@@antoniom9470 my boy starving 😂
*pushes glasses up* Actually, sir, Joker does not fear Batman. He craves his attention and - in some ways - loves him.
I have a the punisher as my photo. But what you just wrote, is really nerdy.
I pretend to be a Knight Templar
Danongorf well actually when they first created Batman, joker was definitely scared of him.
If the Joker is afraid of anyone... it's Batman. Although he may be too insane to even properly realise his own fear. *straightens pocket protector*
This is one of the best stories I've ever seen on this and I've seen alll of them At least top ten.
This dudes style makes the act man.
One kid would go: there’s the kid who thinks he’s Batman
& another kid would go: that kid is Batman 😂🤣
Son from my hood here in BK. This is dope.
East New YUK!
My man is nice with the story telling.
Now this is one of my favorites in the series! Top 3, DEFINITELY!!!! That was so good, I love this guy! I’m looking up his podcast!
Mitchell was spooked 😂😂😁
Great story teller / timing
"thats the kid that think he batman.. nah he is batman"
yo this guy always have some funny yet interesting stories
He is adorable & super cute & frickin funny! 😅😍👏