Oh yes. This one even turned the tables and the narcissist was actually almost convincing me that I was crazy and then I started going to counseling thinking there was something wrong with ME! If you end up having to go to counseling because of someone there is a serious problem even beyond what Mark said here and GET OUT!
Good advice Mark. Definitely had this in the past with the Peter Pans & narcissists & thankfully i have no tolerance for it any more. It can really mess with your head, your nervous system, your emotions and your self-esteem. "Run" is absolutely the best advice!
@@user-vn9sh6hv8r You're right. The central nervous system becomes derailed, dislocated, and you lose control of critical parts of your psyche because of this. It's a bad, nightmare trip. All your own demons are let loose too. These people try to basically dismantle you. It's a profound and vicious form of psychological and emotional torture. I don't have any tolerance for it anymore either.
Timely video, thank you. I appreciate how this video highlights self-worth. Honestly, each subsequent time he’d come back it felt less exciting, because his behavior has caused a decline in his value to me. So, “Run if he does this!” - lacing up my shoes, Mark ;)
A guy who's serious abt u WON'T put u on a roller coaster ride like that. Ladies, pls love yourself n don't come up with excuses for guys who treat u like shit. Listen to yr instincts n run for the hills when u feel something ain't right.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
He probably has a fearful avoidant attachment style. You can never get the good side of them all the time until they work through their fears and insecurities. Thanks for the video. Perfect timing! 🌸
Absolutely spot on Mark. If actions don't match words, if there's breadcrumbs, if there's inconsistent behaviour then you're absolutely right, time to ship out. What we allow will continue unless we put down boundaries. If those boundaries aren't respected, step away from the fella.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I spent 30 years asking myself that question and finally ended it in divorce. Just a heads up to everyone out there, this is great advice. Don't wait to run. Yes it was hard but I'm so happy now. 💗💗💗
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I’ve dealt with a man like this for years and it shifts from knowing it’s his problems to feeling like personal rejection. He would go 7 months talking to me multiple times a day to then going weeks or months without speaking to me. I told him when he came back last January he needed to make a decision to be in my life or not because I needed consistency. We live at a distance but are intimate when we’ve seen each other. We had a few great visits he came last in mid April. Then nothing from him at all maybe just once or twice till now we are in June. I finally cut the cord 👏👏👏 I told him his casual treatment of me is not something I accept from someone I’m intimate with and he can let me know if he’s ever ready to be open and available and we can maybe see then. I have to say I feel pretty at peace with myself now for expressing and asserting my own truth. I understand that I’m bigger than that situation so it doesn’t serve me. We can’t force anything from anyone. I literally feel free. Great video Mark it’s not normal! Guys like this are like the Great Wall of China you take two steps up every time you have a nice visit but you’re back at the first step all over again next time; you can never get any closer to climbing it it’s just an illusion. Those days and weeks of silence are their defense to never allow us to get any closer. But the only one trapped by their wall is them. Not us.
@@SpJrD thanks for the input but the 14 years I’ve known him he’s lived across the country from me and he’s also 6 years younger than I am so there have been a lot of factors I’ve taken into consideration. He’s only lived 2 hours away from me the past couple years now and so in that time I’ve been able to enjoy more visits with him and give a chance to see what happens. My own circumstances as a single mother to a special needs son who is going to always live with me I want to make it clear I wasn’t exactly looking for a full fledged commitment or full time relationship. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want anything I give my time to to not add a real value to my life. Anyways you said it’s about time but it’s about me and my own time.and growth and learning I never want to say words or take action until I know I’m ready and see I have no regret now or unfinished business there.
PREACH! Just finished reading the book Attached and the guy in the story aligns with the avoidant personality type. Really agree that we need to turn our thinking away from “what’s wrong with ME? “ to “is this behavior I find acceptable in a relationship/is this a quality I’m looking for in a partner?”
This video is gold~I’m older and had no idea what this was. After losing my husband of 34 years I started dating and fell for this exact type of man. We broke up, I still get random texts that are like poetry ,,, I don’t dislike him in fact he’s interesting&funny I just no longer take him seriously. Love what you say about these people being ok in your life as long as you’re not emotionally invested. Truth and now I’ve met a great guy who is worthy. People do not waste your time, they will not change. There’s are people out there worth investing in.❤️
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Irrespective of your relationship statues,try be the best woman you can be both financial and otherwise.... I am 42 years old single mum living in California I'm hoping to retire at 50 if things keep going well for me. Bought my first house last month and I can't be more proud than I am right now. I am so glad I made good decisions about my finances that changed me forever.
Fantastic! Could you please share more specific information, what exactly did you do to become financially stronger? Education, work, savings approach, superannuation contributions, investing etc? Xo
Wasn't it Maya Angelou who said, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."...? Guys who are inconsistent are not that interested. Ladies, we deserve better than this! Don't try to fix them, don't stick around...walk away and find a man who WILL value you and who will treat you with respect as a human being. A man who cares for you will not send mixed messages because he will know this sort of behavior could hurt and confuse you. He will strive to avoid this because you are precious to him. On the other hand, a man who doesn't care that much about you will be careless with your heart. Buh bye... Oh and remember, being alone would be far better than being with an inconsistent, likely emotionally unavailable man who will mess with your self esteem and mental health!
Totally agree!!! This hot and cold in relationships for the birds. It's either all or nothing at all !!! He's either in or he's out. Sounds like he was just using her. There are some men out here that will blame it on her if/when she brings it up, like she's got a problem or she's exaggerating and making something out of nothing. Mind and emotional games. BS!! Leave them kind in the dust!!!
Great video! I *just* ran into this myself... I asked myself, "What do I gave to do to get XYZ from him?"...and I stopped myself in my tracks. My NEXT question was, "Why am I trying so hard??" It was a pivotal moment clarity. Thank you for affirming this for me.
Have grown smarter to distance myself from such a person. They're good as a friend but anything other than that, they'll drive you mad. Had started doubting my sanity thinking something was wrong with me but no. I'm good 😌
the friend part of your comment made me giggle about my situation. my biggest attraction to him was how great a friend he was to his people! in fact all I wanted was his friendship. Unfortunately he wanted to date me, so I lost out. It makes me sad for him but if he doesn't choose to address his issues well thats his choice.
@@missscarlett5464 Yeah.. Why do they want to date any girl in sight? Just hang out and be chill. I caved in to the dating thing but doesn't work when friendship is all that one is looking for. Also, glad that it got you giggling 😅
One of THE MOST essential videos EVER. 🎯🎯🎯 I was just having this exact conversation with myself days ago. "What can I do to dodge the worst parts of him, and bring out the best?"... I heard myself saying these things, and could see the next step on that path was to think there was something 'wrong with me' if I didn't have the skills to perform such mental gymnastics with and for my partner. And, at that moment, I knew if I continued, I would be heading down the road toward an abusive relationship. Its hard to know when and how to end things, when there is a strong connection present, and it feels like a relationship hasnt run it's course yet. But I do know its important not to waste too much time, or to become entangled with false hopes. I realize many would cut their ties instantly and leave, and I have been advised to do that, but somehow it hasn't quite felt right inside my own heart to do so.
I AGREE WITH YOU 1000% Mark❣️ NEVER QUESTION YOURSELF❣️ If he or she isn’t giving equally as much as you then there’s your massive sign to hit the road and TIP LADIES & GENTLEMEN…When you know your self worth and YOU are confident there is nothing stopping you. The truth of all of this “gotta know” is it’s all BS. YOU KNOW when he/she is not into you and don’t think it’s because of you that he/She isn’t. It is simply just that you two are NOT the right fit. There should never be any games or BS. SO… KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH, LOVE YOURSELF, & OWN IT IN EVERY PART OF YOUR LIFE!! Much love to you all 🌹🌹💫✨✨
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
THANK YOU! Wish I can get my teenage daughter watching this! This is something every girl, woman, person should know and live by! Thanks, Mark for sharing this with us!
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I thought there was something wrong with him he seemed hot & cold from there beginning, but I could see by 5 th month he wasn’t stepping up … so lesson well learned if it walks like a Duck and quack 🦆 like a Duck 🦆 it is a 🦆 Duck don’t doubt yourself Ladies… walk away .. too many other great guys out there ♥️
Great video--you always give superb advice. I think it's sad though how many times people get into this situation (myself included), believing they need to tap-dance for someone's attention. When in reality, the moment you feel confused by obvious inconsistency should be an alarm bell that this person/relationship isn't in alignment with your needs. Furthermore, even thinking "Maybe I was just overthinking it" should be the wake-up call to ask yourself why you are doubting your own perception--there's an implication yours is faulty but theirs isn't. Actions speak louder than words; don't settle.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I have been going through this hot and cold relationship for 7 years. He never changes or apologizes for disappearing for periods of times. If I question him he denies everything and saids I am over thinking. I know, I have to end it for good. It is emotionally draining and he won't communicate with me as to why he does this over and over again. :(
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
This is rough to hear but explains SO much... which I was already realizing. A guy I was friends with, no couple kind of relationship. When I quit giving him things like I had been-Boom he treats like I’m the pain in his life and is actually mean. We had been friends almost 6 years. I feel naive as hell but all I did for him and gave to him was from my heart. At one point he helped me so much with some tough times I was going through and some gifts along the way. Now it’s like I don’t know who he is.. that hurts badly. Wish I could get mad but I just can’t. Sorry for the rambling. Thank you and the best for you all. #askmark
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Thanks for that. I always had difficulties knowing whether I was the one who had to step up her game. Because I wasn't sure how much should come from me.
With this recent relationship, I wasn't so much asking how I could get the good side of him more often, but more how I could avoid the bad side of him. Eventually I trained myself to just avoid certain topics because not talking about something was easier than inciting him to anger because I didn't just believe him when he told me I was wrong or ignorant or brainwashed (I grew up Christian and still am). Then on top of that, I eventually just decided to stop recommending songs or movies or tv shows or restaurants or activities to him because it was easier than constantly getting told it was a dumb suggestion and I needed to get better taste in things. Then I would get homework in the form of books to read or songs to listen to or movies to watch. My point with all this is that my solution to avoiding the bad side of him was to cut out or hide sides of myself. I know I did it, I just don't know why. That's what I'm working on.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Excelent!! Completely agree with you. Mark, what I think is that us, women have to value ourselves. We have to work on our self esteem.....soooo much!!! That is the base of a good life, in all its aspects. Thanks for your great job Mark. Aída Flores from Honduras, Central America.
The 2nd time a man decline or change his mind on me about something without knowing why... I just walk away. The great thing about lasting relationship is communication. If he is playing you for a fool. It should only happen once and if not twice. Then run and don't look back . I walk away from a man that I really really want because he started pulling crap like this. I'm too busy to babysit and grown man. For real. So long....
Ladies! Thank you for sharing! This really helps me get clarity around a situation I'm dealing with right now. Mark + team, thank you to all of you for the relevant, action-oriented content!!
It is my live question. The deepest imprint in my mind. I grew up in a Family that makes me feel like i am responsible for the violent behavior of the people around me. That i deserve what they did to me. So i did live in such relaitionships for 30 of my 35 years. I decided to detox first. Get to know myself, in my First 30 years there have never been space for a relaitionship to myself to grow. Now there is space. I have created it. I know on the one hand it is total avoidance. On the other, it is an akt of self love. I want to know me First and when i am in touch with my needs and values, there is a possibility to connect without a toxic fusion. On that base i want to make new experiences that can balance out the crap i lived through. I am so afrait of people especialy men. My nervous system needs good and safe new experiences before whatever can grow. At least i am aware of it now... Wish you all the best ❤️ Lot's of love
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Lol… the claw touch.. so so true… I didn’t know that and I was once cooking with a guy and I did that behind him the claw thing as a joke and he immediately turned around and said something….
EXCELLENT video Mark!!! It also put me to think all the other type relationships in my life and how to hold boundaries in there! That question gives so much clarity! Thank you ever so much for your advice! Very impactful!
Relationships are probably a lot harder for men with dismissive avoidant attachment than it is for women since early dating norms dictate men should initiate more. But being avoidant myself, I can honestly say we don't set out to hurt anyone (esp people whom we like)... it's just a painful vicious cycle that starts with fear of intimacy that ultimately hurts our partners and ourselves that need fixing. A lot of therapy needs to happen before avoidants can contribute to healthy relationships. It's honestly awful.
This is eerily similar to what happened to me recently. I went on Holiday for about 3 weeks and came back to a very unresponsive man despite several fun dates before I left. Oh well.
You are right on target with this one. I had a LTR like this and I just hoped that I would see more of Dr. Jekyll and less of Mr. Hyde, but just the opposite happened; the longer the relationship lasted, the worse he got. Thank you for alerting people to this so they can act early on.
This is interesting because I find that I am the one who is being inconsistent. I've been seeing a man every the weekend for about three months, dating at first and then staying overnight, too. It was wonderful at first as we developed from dating to relationship. This month, however, there have been things come up that have caused us to not see each other for 3 weeks now. I am finding that I feel happier not seeing him and feel reluctant to answer my phone when he calls. I know I'm being unfair to him and I am just going to have to be honest and tell him how I feel. I realize that I put aside things that I didn't like about him to focus on his "good side". This video came at a good time. I'll be having that talk with him today. Thank you!
Spot on. I was “involved” with a divorced man for 4 months (had been with his XW for almost 30 yrs, divorced for 2.5) and I am reluctant to say we were “dating” as in hindsight, I felt we were just a fling. His communication/presence was almost non existent when we were not together and we only saw each other once a week. There were also several other factors which were huge red flags. His ex gf prior to me had gone on a 3 week vacation and he told me he didn’t even miss her. However, I knew not to internalize it because HE has an established pattern now - emotionally unavailable! All women need to see this video.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I went out with a guy, went out three times. Lots of flirting, texting, so I tell him he kept speaking about sex, he told me he wanted friends with benefits, that he's busy, no explanation of busyness, but I let him know if sex was what he wanted I deserve to be in a relationship. Then he ghosts me, I confronted him one day, and his whole attitude changed, at that point I just stopped. His actions are speaking loud and clear. He wants the girlfriend experience but he wasn't ready for a relationship, I suspect he has other people he may have been doing same thing to. I'm a catch, and I don't waste time with that kind of guy.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
I Sooo Needed that. My man (we met 42yrs ago & finally became a couple) had been planning 3 days for him to be at my apartment so we could just be together. On my B'day, he texted & said he was sick and wouldn't want me to catch anything. I never got a phone call to say Happy birthday, I love you. 4 days later, we had talked very briefly on the 3rd day, i sent a "you seem to be emotionally moving away" I got a text that said Drama!?! I can't with you. Goodbye...I was instantly blocked even on his phone. I've been devastated ever since... so thank you again for this video. P.S. My mental health counselor daughter diagnosed me with "BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER" I've been beating myself up over my huge mistake since May 22nd!
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Thanks Mark, my situation is much more critical than this and that's why l decided to let him go because I don't ever like the difficult man n specially the man who has no backbone , it's really now very disgusting as well irritating, lots n lots of bad habbits , and lastly he is very manipulative nature , you must be understand what l mean to say , however this message helping me a lot ,thank you so much.
This is absolut excellent advice!!! It is exactly the way into a toxic relationship because you want to have the good and start working for it - alone. You are such a wonderful coach, Mark, plus charming like hell and entertaining (love all videos with wigs especially), keep up your great work, I have become a real fan! And it helped a lot to understand these things. Thanks for all you do here for us! 🙂
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I had 5 dates with a guy, everytime we had a great time. Then he stopped writing for like 3-4 days. And after that like nothing happend he wrote again. Im so tired of this shit! He said he cant wait to see me again and that were more then friends. I think i have to cut that shit :(
I went through the same thing. He ghosted me for a year then came back and asked me out. It all went great until the 4th or 5th date and then he started disappearing again. We deserve better!!!! Get out while you can
Omg Yes... sounds like my own story with a guy...turns out after I did ask myself that ? He was seeing someone else and was juggling the two of us...thus the inconsistency. Wow did I explode 🤣 then angry sad and finally clarity ..it was a great learning curve.. don't want a man like that back..he's not even a man really... just a loser ... I'm happy now 🤗
this happened to me but in an opposite way,well he was very good to me and more than amazing when we were in the same place but when he travelled his changed and disappeared for days not even texting thought we were talking all day long before he travelled,then acting like busy and am the one who cant understand this,,this is just lame very mean and hurtful
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
M speaking to a guy he is doc...4 days he spoke to me n said he loves me completely n wants to be in my life in future...but suddenly he is not msg me n may be he is busy completely .... should I give him a chance?
I totally relate to this consistency need and that it makes us anxious not to feel remembered, valued, decently paid emotional respect for. It IS etheric cards that ties our spiritual-emotional energy cycle and -aura to our attached beloved. Yet I do, as a Fearful Avoidant attaching woman (FA) also emphasize that a relationship isn't all about a dense, obliging deal most of the time. Most men need to pull away to feel and process, and retreat to breath and get up their hormonal apparatus to recharge and start to miss things/you and value things. They aren't flooded with over emotional hormones and they live in a performance pressurized life as males in career and masculine related stereotypical rules. That makes it harder for them to go deep within and keep that root in self. This video is unfortunate and screwed by Subjectification: (citate to be inserted ) really bound by Anxious attachment needs. I think. Interdependence and allowance of spiritual individuality is very healthy. Work on your self esteem too. ♡
Why would we have to talk everyday? I'm happy w what is available for just me. J. Busy as well. I do not question myself anymore. Never. I stop it right there. I accept the person is busy. He's worried about getting too close. I don't talk to my friends everyday. So why would b e and I need to talk everyday day?
I'm dating a man from Dubai and were currently at the stage where he's been hurt by his ex who cheated on him with another man and he's stopped admitting his feelings. He won't even tell me how he feels until I go and be with him in Dubai is this normal?? Mark help me please thanks ❤️❤️
Mark, thank you for a great content. This truly also happened to me. I was always curious to know why this person is acting in this way? What could be possible reasons behind it?
I would know that the man was seeing other women and disappear. They can dish this behavior out, but not take it. My No Contact, would be good, setting boundaries, shortly get overstepped. Game On, is their response, and the fake and take begins.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Have any of you ladies asked yourself this question before? Leave your story below!! 👇
Oh yes. This one even turned the tables and the narcissist was actually almost convincing me that I was crazy and then I started going to counseling thinking there was something wrong with ME! If you end up having to go to counseling because of someone there is a serious problem even beyond what Mark said here and GET OUT!
Good advice Mark. Definitely had this in the past with the Peter Pans & narcissists & thankfully i have no tolerance for it any more. It can really mess with your head, your nervous system, your emotions and your self-esteem. "Run" is absolutely the best advice!
@@user-vn9sh6hv8r You're right. The central nervous system becomes derailed, dislocated, and you lose control of critical parts of your psyche because of this. It's a bad, nightmare trip. All your own demons are let loose too. These people try to basically dismantle you. It's a profound and vicious form of psychological and emotional torture. I don't have any tolerance for it anymore either.
I'm going through this at this moment for 8 months it has destroyed me emotionally I'm finding it hard to pick myself up from how I let him treat me
Timely video, thank you. I appreciate how this video highlights self-worth. Honestly, each subsequent time he’d come back it felt less exciting, because his behavior has caused a decline in his value to me. So, “Run if he does this!” - lacing up my shoes, Mark ;)
A guy who's serious abt u WON'T put u on a roller coaster ride like that. Ladies, pls love yourself n don't come up with excuses for guys who treat u like shit. Listen to yr instincts n run for the hills when u feel something ain't right.
mmmmmmm gut feeling always true
“Cut that shit” is the best advice you could ever give!
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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He probably has a fearful avoidant attachment style. You can never get the good side of them all the time until they work through their fears and insecurities. Thanks for the video. Perfect timing! 🌸
Absolutely spot on Mark. If actions don't match words, if there's breadcrumbs, if there's inconsistent behaviour then you're absolutely right, time to ship out. What we allow will continue unless we put down boundaries. If those boundaries aren't respected, step away from the fella.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom, Lavender! x
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
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I spent 30 years asking myself that question and finally ended it in divorce. Just a heads up to everyone out there, this is great advice. Don't wait to run. Yes it was hard but I'm so happy now. 💗💗💗
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
I’ve dealt with a man like this for years and it shifts from knowing it’s his problems to feeling like personal rejection. He would go 7 months talking to me multiple times a day to then going weeks or months without speaking to me. I told him when he came back last January he needed to make a decision to be in my life or not because I needed consistency. We live at a distance but are intimate when we’ve seen each other. We had a few great visits he came last in mid April. Then nothing from him at all maybe just once or twice till now we are in June. I finally cut the cord 👏👏👏 I told him his casual treatment of me is not something I accept from someone I’m intimate with and he can let me know if he’s ever ready to be open and available and we can maybe see then. I have to say I feel pretty at peace with myself now for expressing and asserting my own truth. I understand that I’m bigger than that situation so it doesn’t serve me. We can’t force anything from anyone. I literally feel free. Great video Mark it’s not normal! Guys like this are like the Great Wall of China you take two steps up every time you have a nice visit but you’re back at the first step all over again next time; you can never get any closer to climbing it it’s just an illusion. Those days and weeks of silence are their defense to never allow us to get any closer. But the only one trapped by their wall is them. Not us.
Thank you. Your comment was worth reading.
at the point!!!
@@jeanetteh.9240 thank you all the best to you 😊
About time you realized he’s not a keeper
@@SpJrD thanks for the input but the 14 years I’ve known him he’s lived across the country from me and he’s also 6 years younger than I am so there have been a lot of factors I’ve taken into consideration. He’s only lived 2 hours away from me the past couple years now and so in that time I’ve been able to enjoy more visits with him and give a chance to see what happens. My own circumstances as a single mother to a special needs son who is going to always live with me I want to make it clear I wasn’t exactly looking for a full fledged commitment or full time relationship. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want anything I give my time to to not add a real value to my life. Anyways you said it’s about time but it’s about me and my own time.and growth and learning I never want to say words or take action until I know I’m ready and see I have no regret now or unfinished business there.
PREACH! Just finished reading the book Attached and the guy in the story aligns with the avoidant personality type. Really agree that we need to turn our thinking away from “what’s wrong with ME? “ to “is this behavior I find acceptable in a relationship/is this a quality I’m looking for in a partner?”
💯!! Well said 👏🏻
so true !!!!
Omg! We're reading the same book, Laili. Only got 40 pages left or so. I know the guy you're talking about from the book :)
Hi! You gave me a book to read yay
This video is gold~I’m older and had no idea what this was. After losing my husband of 34 years I started dating and fell for this exact type of man. We broke up, I still get random texts that are like poetry ,,, I don’t dislike him in fact he’s interesting&funny I just no longer take him seriously.
Love what you say about these people being ok in your life as long as you’re not emotionally invested. Truth and now I’ve met a great guy who is worthy.
People do not waste your time, they will not change. There’s are people out there worth investing in.❤️
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Text me via what’s app for recommendation ❤️❤️❤️
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From Los Angeles ❤️❤️
Irrespective of your relationship statues,try be the best woman you can be both financial and otherwise....
I am 42 years old single mum living in California I'm hoping to retire at 50 if things keep going well for me. Bought my first house last month and I can't be more proud than I am right now. I am so glad I made good decisions about my finances that changed me forever.
Fantastic! Could you please share more specific information, what exactly did you do to become financially stronger? Education, work, savings approach, superannuation contributions, investing etc? Xo
Is buying a house have anything to do with the subject at hand?
So glad for you. Hope things are going well for you.
Wasn't it Maya Angelou who said, "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time."...?
Guys who are inconsistent are not that interested. Ladies, we deserve better than this! Don't try to fix them, don't stick around...walk away and find a man who WILL value you and who will treat you with respect as a human being. A man who cares for you will not send mixed messages because he will know this sort of behavior could hurt and confuse you. He will strive to avoid this because you are precious to him. On the other hand, a man who doesn't care that much about you will be careless with your heart. Buh bye...
Oh and remember, being alone would be far better than being with an inconsistent, likely emotionally unavailable man who will mess with your self esteem and mental health!
Excellent 👍👍👍
Totally agree!!! This hot and cold in relationships for the birds. It's either all or nothing at all !!! He's either in or he's out. Sounds like he was just using her. There are some men out here that will blame it on her if/when she brings it up, like she's got a problem or she's exaggerating and making something out of nothing. Mind and emotional games. BS!! Leave them kind in the dust!!!
Truly fixed my current situation/breakup. Confirmed. I feel far better about my choice to stop the madness I’ve been in. Sooo grateful
Great video! I *just* ran into this myself... I asked myself, "What do I gave to do to get XYZ from him?"...and I stopped myself in my tracks. My NEXT question was, "Why am I trying so hard??" It was a pivotal moment clarity. Thank you for affirming this for me.
So smart. You can ask for your needs to be met but don’t take it personally if he doesn’t do it. Don’t try to change him.
Gosh this girl has so much patience
Have grown smarter to distance myself from such a person. They're good as a friend but anything other than that, they'll drive you mad. Had started doubting my sanity thinking something was wrong with me but no. I'm good 😌
the friend part of your comment made me giggle about my situation. my biggest attraction to him was how great a friend he was to his people! in fact all I wanted was his friendship. Unfortunately he wanted to date me, so I lost out. It makes me sad for him but if he doesn't choose to address his issues well thats his choice.
@@missscarlett5464 Yeah.. Why do they want to date any girl in sight? Just hang out and be chill. I caved in to the dating thing but doesn't work when friendship is all that one is looking for.
Also, glad that it got you giggling 😅
Hugs🤗❤
One of THE MOST essential videos EVER.
🎯🎯🎯 I was just having this exact conversation with myself days ago. "What can I do to dodge the worst parts of him, and bring out the best?"... I heard myself saying these things, and could see the next step on that path was to think there was something 'wrong with me' if I didn't have the skills to perform such mental gymnastics with and for my partner. And, at that moment, I knew if I continued, I would be heading down the road toward an abusive relationship.
Its hard to know when and how to end things, when there is a strong connection present, and it feels like a relationship hasnt run it's course yet. But I do know its important not to waste too much time, or to become entangled with false hopes. I realize many would cut their ties instantly and leave, and I have been advised to do that, but somehow it hasn't quite felt right inside my own heart to do so.
I can recommend you to someone that helped me get my ex back
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I AGREE WITH YOU 1000% Mark❣️ NEVER QUESTION YOURSELF❣️ If he or she isn’t giving equally as much as you then there’s your massive sign to hit the road and TIP LADIES & GENTLEMEN…When you know your self worth and YOU are confident there is nothing stopping you. The truth of all of this “gotta know” is it’s all BS. YOU KNOW when he/she is not into you and don’t think it’s because of you that he/She isn’t. It is simply just that you two are NOT the right fit. There should never be any games or BS. SO… KNOW YOUR SELF WORTH, LOVE YOURSELF, & OWN IT IN EVERY PART OF YOUR LIFE!! Much love to you all 🌹🌹💫✨✨
Yup when I was married. I tried to change myself so that he would want to spend time with me. It was awful.
It's the worst. Meanwhile, there's a guy out there who cannot wait to meet someone just like you
I reckon he was seeing multiple women and just went cold when he was otherwise occupied
This makes me appreciate my cat so much!
Yessss ‼️🐱💕💕💕
😅
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
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THANK YOU! Wish I can get my teenage daughter watching this! This is something every girl, woman, person should know and live by! Thanks, Mark for sharing this with us!
🙏🙏🙏
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
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From Los Angeles
Excellent video and background consultation 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻RUN ! This behavior is called conditioning to be content with bare minimum. Downhill from there !!!
I thought there was something wrong with him he seemed hot & cold from there beginning, but I could see by 5 th month he wasn’t stepping up … so lesson well learned if it walks like a Duck and quack 🦆 like a Duck 🦆 it is a 🦆 Duck don’t doubt yourself Ladies… walk away .. too many other great guys out there ♥️
too many other great guys? Nope. None.
Lol he’s obviously talking to someone else
i love that lush greenery! looks so refreshing. I could sit there all day and read a good book.
🙏🙏🙏
Great video--you always give superb advice. I think it's sad though how many times people get into this situation (myself included), believing they need to tap-dance for someone's attention. When in reality, the moment you feel confused by obvious inconsistency should be an alarm bell that this person/relationship isn't in alignment with your needs. Furthermore, even thinking "Maybe I was just overthinking it" should be the wake-up call to ask yourself why you are doubting your own perception--there's an implication yours is faulty but theirs isn't. Actions speak louder than words; don't settle.
well said girl!!!!
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
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From Los Angeles
Amen sis
Hm. Conditioning her to chaos....Mark this is a great topic 💪🏻💪🏽💪🏻💪🏽👏🏻👏🏻👏🏽👏🏽
I have been going through this hot and cold relationship for 7 years.
He never changes or apologizes for disappearing for periods of times. If I question him he denies everything and saids I am over thinking. I know, I have to end it for good. It is emotionally draining and he won't communicate with me as to why he does this over and over again. :(
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
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Dismissive avoidant he was😁
This is rough to hear but explains SO much... which I was already realizing. A guy I was friends with, no couple kind of relationship. When I quit giving him things like I had been-Boom he treats like I’m the pain in his life and is actually mean. We had been friends almost 6 years.
I feel naive as hell but all I did for him and gave to him was from my heart. At one point he helped me so much with some tough times I was going through and some gifts along the way.
Now it’s like I don’t know who he is.. that hurts badly. Wish I could get mad but I just can’t. Sorry for the rambling.
Thank you and the best for you all.
#askmark
I decided to run! 😃 Thanks Mark (who is always wearing the best shirts)! This talk was spot on!
🙏🙏🙏
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
Thanks for that. I always had difficulties knowing whether I was the one who had to step up her game. Because I wasn't sure how much should come from me.
I haven't asked myself this question in my current relationship. You've helped me soo much Mark, thank you doesn't seem enough x
With this recent relationship, I wasn't so much asking how I could get the good side of him more often, but more how I could avoid the bad side of him.
Eventually I trained myself to just avoid certain topics because not talking about something was easier than inciting him to anger because I didn't just believe him when he told me I was wrong or ignorant or brainwashed (I grew up Christian and still am).
Then on top of that, I eventually just decided to stop recommending songs or movies or tv shows or restaurants or activities to him because it was easier than constantly getting told it was a dumb suggestion and I needed to get better taste in things. Then I would get homework in the form of books to read or songs to listen to or movies to watch.
My point with all this is that my solution to avoiding the bad side of him was to cut out or hide sides of myself. I know I did it, I just don't know why. That's what I'm working on.
This is timely. This is the answer from God. Thanks Mark.
There it is... a good question to stop asking in retrospect too... 🥀
Ohhh my Gawd , Thank you!!! I did the right thing then before i saw this video! I could just hug you! And hug myself.
Great to hear that, Mary! Happy for you! x 😊
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
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@@Markrosenfeld Mark here is my hugs to you on behalf of her🤗❤
Excelent!! Completely agree with you. Mark, what I think is that us, women have to value ourselves. We have to work on our self esteem.....soooo much!!! That is the base of a good life, in all its aspects. Thanks for your great job Mark. Aída Flores from Honduras, Central America.
Let me recommend you to the same person that helped me get my ex back without delay
Consult him on what sap
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The 2nd time a man decline or change his mind on me about something without knowing why... I just walk away.
The great thing about lasting relationship is communication.
If he is playing you for a fool. It should only happen once and if not twice.
Then run and don't look back .
I walk away from a man that I really really want because he started pulling crap like this. I'm too busy to babysit and grown man. For real.
So long....
Thank you so much 1000% CUT that s***. HIS inconsistency = his problems. Periodtttt
.
I want to recommend you to the same person that helped me get my ex back
Consult him from what sap
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🎀🎀
Ladies! Thank you for sharing! This really helps me get clarity around a situation I'm dealing with right now.
Mark + team, thank you to all of you for the relevant, action-oriented content!!
Mark your videos have changed my life thank you
Awww thanks for the beautiful comment, whalesforhamsters! Means a lot 🙏
Omg I really, really, really wish I had seen this a decade ago :(. Thank you for sharing this.
You're welcome, Uplifting! Thanks for watching! x
Ruining your nervous system ....RUN ❣️❣️❣️
It is my live question. The deepest imprint in my mind. I grew up in a Family that makes me feel like i am responsible for the violent behavior of the people around me. That i deserve what they did to me. So i did live in such relaitionships for 30 of my 35 years. I decided to detox first. Get to know myself, in my First 30 years there have never been space for a relaitionship to myself to grow. Now there is space. I have created it. I know on the one hand it is total avoidance. On the other, it is an akt of self love. I want to know me First and when i am in touch with my needs and values, there is a possibility to connect without a toxic fusion. On that base i want to make new experiences that can balance out the crap i lived through. I am so afrait of people especialy men. My nervous system needs good and safe new experiences before whatever can grow. At least i am aware of it now... Wish you all the best ❤️ Lot's of love
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Text me via what’s app for recommendation ❤️❤️❤️
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Lol… the claw touch.. so so true… I didn’t know that and I was once cooking with a guy and I did that behind him the claw thing as a joke and he immediately turned around and said something….
GREAT ADVICE. CORRECT. AVOIDANCE.
HOT & COLD. NO COMMITMENT.
I can recommend you to someone that helped me get my ex back
What sap him
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EXCELLENT video Mark!!! It also put me to think all the other type relationships in my life and how to hold boundaries in there! That question gives so much clarity! Thank you ever so much for your advice! Very impactful!
Wooow!!! Thank you so much! It's very interesting, I'm from Rwanda and I like the way you are honesty man. Keep it up.
Thanks so much, Angelique! Great to have you on here! x
Relationships are probably a lot harder for men with dismissive avoidant attachment than it is for women since early dating norms dictate men should initiate more. But being avoidant myself, I can honestly say we don't set out to hurt anyone (esp people whom we like)... it's just a painful vicious cycle that starts with fear of intimacy that ultimately hurts our partners and ourselves that need fixing. A lot of therapy needs to happen before avoidants can contribute to healthy relationships. It's honestly awful.
This is eerily similar to what happened to me recently. I went on Holiday for about 3 weeks and came back to a very unresponsive man despite several fun dates before I left. Oh well.
Oh that sucks. His loss. Thanks for sharing, Rachel! x
Preach babe
You are right on target with this one. I had a LTR like this and I just hoped that I would see more of Dr. Jekyll and less of Mr. Hyde, but just the opposite happened; the longer the relationship lasted, the worse he got. Thank you for alerting people to this so they can act early on.
Thanks so much, Gifted Brain! x
This is interesting because I find that I am the one who is being inconsistent. I've been seeing a man every the weekend for about three months, dating at first and then staying overnight, too. It was wonderful at first as we developed from dating to relationship. This month, however, there have been things come up that have caused us to not see each other for 3 weeks now. I am finding that I feel happier not seeing him and feel reluctant to answer my phone when he calls. I know I'm being unfair to him and I am just going to have to be honest and tell him how I feel. I realize that I put aside things that I didn't like about him to focus on his "good side". This video came at a good time. I'll be having that talk with him today. Thank you!
Thank you. I needed this.
Spot on. I was “involved” with a divorced man for 4 months (had been with his XW for almost 30 yrs, divorced for 2.5) and I am reluctant to say we were “dating” as in hindsight, I felt we were just a fling. His communication/presence was almost non existent when we were not together and we only saw each other once a week. There were also several other factors which were huge red flags. His ex gf prior to me had gone on a 3 week vacation and he told me he didn’t even miss her. However, I knew not to internalize it because HE has an established pattern now - emotionally unavailable! All women need to see this video.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
This is the most important thing I ever heard!!
Awww thanks, StudioEB! 🙏
I went out with a guy, went out three times. Lots of flirting, texting, so I tell him he kept speaking about sex, he told me he wanted friends with benefits, that he's busy, no explanation of busyness, but I let him know if sex was what he wanted I deserve to be in a relationship. Then he ghosts me, I confronted him one day, and his whole attitude changed, at that point I just stopped. His actions are speaking loud and clear. He wants the girlfriend experience but he wasn't ready for a relationship, I suspect he has other people he may have been doing same thing to. I'm a catch, and I don't waste time with that kind of guy.
🌺Great video Mark thanks for super advice Namaste from India Viji here🌺😊
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Text me via what’s app for recommendation ❤️❤️❤️
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Yes... he turned out to be a narc.
Great advice ! love the background noise. :)
My thoughts went from whats wrong with him to what's wrong with me. 😔
I Sooo Needed that. My man (we met 42yrs ago & finally became a couple) had been planning 3 days for him to be at my apartment so we could just be together. On my B'day, he texted & said he was sick and wouldn't want me to catch anything. I never got a phone call to say Happy birthday, I love you. 4 days later, we had talked very briefly on the 3rd day, i sent a "you seem to be emotionally moving away" I got a text that said Drama!?! I can't with you. Goodbye...I was instantly blocked even on his phone. I've been devastated ever since... so thank you again for this video. P.S. My mental health counselor daughter diagnosed me with "BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER" I've been beating myself up over my huge mistake since May 22nd!
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
Awesome! Thanks Mark, very useful advice 🙂🙏
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem ❤️❤️❤️
Text me via what’s app for recommendation ❤️❤️❤️
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Your advice is right on target. Thanks !
Profound insight. Thanks, Mark!
🙏🙏🙏
Beautifully said!
Thank you Mark❤
Thank you mark! I needed this today!!!
Thanks Mark, my situation is much more critical than this and that's why l decided to let him go because I don't ever like the difficult man n specially the man who has no backbone , it's really now very disgusting as well irritating, lots n lots of bad habbits , and lastly he is very manipulative nature , you must be understand what l mean to say , however this message helping me a lot ,thank you so much.
thank you
very insightful
Thank you, Gen! 🙏
This is absolut excellent advice!!! It is exactly the way into a toxic relationship because you want to have the good and start working for it - alone. You are such a wonderful coach, Mark, plus charming like hell and entertaining (love all videos with wigs especially), keep up your great work, I have become a real fan! And it helped a lot to understand these things. Thanks for all you do here for us! 🙂
When a person fall in love .. its because the characteristics of that person that he or she love or just happening like that (a chemical thing)
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
Maybe it’s just attraction of the face
I love you Mark
Such a good point. Literally in this situation right now 😿
Thank you that was very helpful. 💕
Glad the video helped, Kimmy. Thanks for watching!
Excellent video, Mark 😊
I had 5 dates with a guy, everytime we had a great time. Then he stopped writing for like 3-4 days. And after that like nothing happend he wrote again. Im so tired of this shit! He said he cant wait to see me again and that were more then friends. I think i have to cut that shit :(
I went through the same thing. He ghosted me for a year then came back and asked me out. It all went great until the 4th or 5th date and then he started disappearing again. We deserve better!!!! Get out while you can
Omg Yes... sounds like my own story with a guy...turns out after I did ask myself that ? He was seeing someone else and was juggling the two of us...thus the inconsistency. Wow did I explode 🤣 then angry sad and finally clarity ..it was a great learning curve.. don't want a man like that back..he's not even a man really... just a loser ... I'm happy now 🤗
WOW !!!! GREAT PIECE OF ADVICE MARK 💖💖💖
Thank you, Anne! 🙏
this happened to me but in an opposite way,well he was very good to me and more than amazing when we were in the same place but when he travelled his changed and disappeared for days not even texting thought we were talking all day long before he travelled,then acting like busy and am the one who cant understand this,,this is just lame very mean and hurtful
Thank you!
You're welcome, Rosita! x
Good advice!! You are so right! Thanks for sharing!!❤️
GREAT VIDEO MARK!!!!
Thanks so much, Tara! 🙏
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
Aaaahhhhh time to run for the hills I guess 😅
I really needed this video it’s so cool
You are amazing I love you Mark😊
Thank you, shx3sh
! x
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
Love your work Mark! X
I can recommend you to the same person that helped me get my ex back
What sap him
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M speaking to a guy he is doc...4 days he spoke to me n said he loves me completely n wants to be in my life in future...but suddenly he is not msg me n may be he is busy completely .... should I give him a chance?
I totally relate to this consistency need and that it makes us anxious not to feel remembered, valued, decently paid emotional respect for. It IS etheric cards that ties our spiritual-emotional energy cycle and -aura to our attached beloved. Yet I do, as a Fearful Avoidant attaching woman (FA) also emphasize that a relationship isn't all about a dense, obliging deal most of the time. Most men need to pull away to feel and process, and retreat to breath and get up their hormonal apparatus to recharge and start to miss things/you and value things. They aren't flooded with over emotional hormones and they live in a performance pressurized life as males in career and masculine related stereotypical rules. That makes it harder for them to go deep within and keep that root in self.
This video is unfortunate and screwed by Subjectification: (citate to be inserted ) really bound by Anxious attachment needs. I think.
Interdependence and allowance of spiritual individuality is very healthy.
Work on your self esteem too. ♡
Thanks Mark.😊
Let me recommend you to the same person that helped me get my ex back
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Why would we have to talk everyday? I'm happy w what is available for just me. J. Busy as well.
I do not question myself anymore. Never. I stop it right there. I accept the person is busy.
He's worried about getting too close. I don't talk to my friends everyday. So why would b e and I need to talk everyday day?
I'm dating a man from Dubai and were currently at the stage where he's been hurt by his ex who cheated on him with another man and he's stopped admitting his feelings. He won't even tell me how he feels until I go and be with him in Dubai is this normal?? Mark help me please thanks ❤️❤️
@@yushaumuhammadgadam9792 is that a phone number
Awesome ❤️❤️
Is he emirati?
@@evealexandra4367 yes is that okay ?!
LeAnn Swift all im going to say is be careful! I’m western but lived in dubai for years..please just be careful x
Sending a text message on her birthday tells it all
Mark, thank you for a great content. This truly also happened to me. I was always curious to know why this person is acting in this way? What could be possible reasons behind it?
Time to exit the emotional roller coaster ride!
Why would anyone ghost you? @4:11
I would know that the man was seeing other women and disappear. They can dish this behavior out, but not take it. My No Contact, would be good, setting boundaries, shortly get overstepped. Game On, is their response, and the fake and take begins.
I got my help from someone, he was the only one who was able to help me bring back my ex husband back to me and he save and solve my relationship problem
Text me via what’s app for recommendation
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From Los Angeles
5🌟 Tip ladies: He is a dismissive Avoidant! Now 🏃💨RUN!!😂
Mark you is a darling😼🤗❤ though I know your attachment style too👽😍
You saved mah life! ❤🤗
It's total game player. / Talker