ObGyn Reacts: Surprise Home Birth ALONE | Didn't Know I Was Pregnant
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 พ.ค. 2024
- Click here cen.yt/functionmamadoctorjones2 to get 20% off your custom formula from Function of Beauty. Available in the US, GB, EU, CA, AUS, NZ and more!!! Function of Beauty makes unique personalized hair care that is vegan and cruelty-free.
Ob/Gyn physician Mama Doctor Jones reviews an episode of TLC's "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" while teaching and commenting on the show. In this episode we see unique decisions - a pregnant woman who had no idea she was giving birth, but after having the baby decided not to call for medical help or let anyone in her family know!
Offended By Science Shirts: teespring.com/stores/mamadoct...
5 Things Your Gynecologist Wants You To Know: PCOS Misconceptions: • 5 Things Your Gynecolo...
** The information in this video is intended to serve as educational information and is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/advanced practice provider. **
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
* designates links which are affiliates...
Ads and gifted items are clearly disclosed in videos and links.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Y'all, I honestly thought I was watching the prequel to a horrifying Kendall Rae episode!! So happy her and baby Blake are ok!!
If her blood pressure was that high could that have contributed to why she wasn't "thinking straight"?
You’ll always be my favorite doctor on TH-cam! I absolutely love all of your informative videos and reactions ❤️
You watch kendell Rae 😱 lol not right time
I just realised it's Monday
Eeeee! The fact that you watch Kendall makes me so happy!! I think you should collab with RawbeautyKristi now that she is pregnant. 😊 I worked in the OBOR this weekend and got to help a mom hold her baby and keep her calm while the surgeon sutured. Thats my favorite part of being an anesthesia tech. 😁
She was clearly traumatized by a medical professional at some point. She’s terrified to go to the hospital or a doctor under any case. This is a serious phobia.
I spent a year trying to get answers for my pain. Turns out my gallbladder was a mess, needed it out. A year of doctors visits, test after test. When i ended up in a hospital out of state it took them 20 minutes to tell me what I needed. They wouldn't do the surgery since I was from out of state so I had to wait to go home and still had to wait almost another week for someone to say yeah let's get this out of you. More and more I have to force myself to go to the doctor for even small things. You just get tired of the system at some point.
That was my thought, as well. I get treated like I'm crazy every time I bring up my menstrual issues, even by female doctors. "I've been having extremely irregular, clot heavy periods, accompanied by migraines, my sciatic pinching, and my labia feeling extremely bruised every time I get my period at all, can we do something to look at that?" "Well, everyone's period is different. I'll do a hormone test even though you're on hormonal birth control that changes your hormones and not look any further than that. Your birth control will probably stop your cycle, anyways." "....................whatever. fine, I guess." Like what the hell else am I supposed to do without spending money I don't have?
Same, then your given pain meds for period cramps that put you in bed for 3 days or told to go on birth control even tho you have migraines. Then another doctor tells you not to go on BC with migraine as it can cause a stroke. Then another one laughs at the healthy organic food plan one obgyn told you to go on for pain. Then all my life I find out at 23 I was misdiagnosed with a bleeding disorder. Now it does not exist and everyone looks at me like I’m crazy or compares my bruises and bleeding to older people. I hate doctors/hospitals or any medical field. I get high blood pressure and anxiety when I walk into a medical office.
There are so many stories of medical professional ignoring and dismissing women's pain that I wouldn't be surprised. I would also consider other things that ad to that, like was she ever shamed by a doctor, was she scared that she would be shamed for not knowing she was pregnant, for not going to a doctor sooner, for smoking etc.? Was she scared that her husband and family wouldn't believe her that she really gave birth and she would lose the baby she wanted so much? There is clearly some more serious background going on and when you're in shock, you just don't think rationally. Add her blood pressure to it and her rational thinking might have been pretty non-existent at that point. I'm glad they both made it through and are ok.
I know someone that was molested as a preteen by her dentist. That made hernot want to go to the dentist until she was 45.
Traumas are serious and I wish more people paid attentio to them, especially parents
*Me:* "wow this lady is straight up stupid"
*Doc Jones:* "poor woman, how badly they must've treated her in the hospital for her to refuse medical help"
*Me:* "...oh my god i'm a heartless monster"
Agree! She is DUMB AF. How is that baby alive?!
@sad mess I'm thankful that you haven't had to experience the same amount and/or type of abuse that she's likely experienced to cause her to react the way she did. You're not heartless, it's an unfortunate truth that most people don't understand how others could react differently from themselves unless they too have experienced a similar experience. Even then, it's still difficult for many people to view things from other perspectives. The fact that you are able to step back and re-examine your assessment just from hearing Dr. Jones' comments shows that you're a caring person.
Doctors are so used to practicing how they talk and censor themselves so I'm not surprised by her reaction or response but I have to agree with you on that
Her distrust is no excuse
for her actions, to me. Especially after the birth happened. Luckily this worked out but she knew better and CHOSE the most selfish path. Unless there is more we don’t know, I have to agree with you!
Cindy Nguyen so you are heartless too
A lot of people are calling her dumb, but knowing that some people in the US call UBER instead of an ambulance to avoid the high bills, it's not surprising the real reason she didn't want to go to a doctor was actually financial rather than bad treatment.
The labor alone costs $50k.
I don't think it's that entirely, it could be part of it I just think people like her are mistrustful of ignorance of medical stuff.
@@mistressgenevieve5726 That is not true. Maybe in California or some insane state where the government interferes more than usual. I will grant prices are constantly rising (as is what happens when the Fed continually creates dollars out of this air.)
But back to my point, I use a cost sharing program where I get reimbursed, but I go in as self pay. Everything all together was about $7K for my 2nd daughter, I think shy of $10K for my third and fourth. For both ob/gyn prenatal care, labor and delivery for me, doctor and hospital, costs for baby, epidural on 2nd and 3rd babies, hearing tests, everything.
@@allie8442 when the "government interferes more than usual" the price of healthcare is lower and the quality is higher. I'm a US citizen living in Germany, I see this firsthand.
That has nothing to do with this…..
As a therapist , i’m wondering if the reason she waited so long and didn’t think about calling for help or telling anyone , may have been related to temporary psychosis related to trauma or perhaps her extraordinary high blood pressure ? Such a shocking story but thank God they both ended up okay. And SUPER impressed she clamped and cut the cord herself , obviously must have birthed the placenta herself, and nursed him without any support at all .
She was not having psychosis.. Give me a break.
Her reluctance to see a doctor breaks my heart. When I had serious complications from endometriosis my obgyn gave me advice. "If you end up in the ER again for this, tell them you're having severe stomach pains. Once they get you a bed, THATS when you tell them its endo related. You'll get care faster if they dont know it's a womans issue "
That's so wrong you have to do that to be taken seriously 🙍
This happened to me as well they left me sitting in the waiting room for HOURS until I threw up in the room and then someone came rushing over to me
Wow!
@@makeinubaka
I'm so sorry you were treated in that way. That seems awfully callous on their part. I have gone to my doctor for a few mild things I couldn't explain, and my doctor and nurses treated me kindly and professionally. They said better safe than sorry.
Now, being a cancer survivor, I *must* check out even the smallest things because that small thing could be related.
(getting old, man: it's not for the faint of heart.)
Momo IsAwesome would they pay for an ER visit? Maybe you can go to the ER and it’ll be paid for along with general testing?
my guess: this woman had a dissociative episode because of this overwhelming pain and then the birth
Also, don't forget the high blood pressure. There is a great comment in this section about someone's experience with severely high blood pressure. Worth a look and a read, for sure.
Yup! Happened to me. I went into labor so fast and had my son so quick that I was in shock and totally dissociated for about 3 days.
Or she had no health insurance
Or possibly trauma related to medical care, perhaps all of it at once, she was very overwhelmed.
I thought the same thing, Hannah. Especially given that she has no recollection of why she acted the way she did. Going into a fugue during extreme trauma/stress (which in this case was probably exacerbated by the hypertension) is very well documented.
My guess is it was a mix between shock, fear, and guilt. Some animals hide when they are giving birth, and wont come out for days. I suspect it was this instinct and she was just running on pure instinct at that point and just didn't know what to do. She needed someone like her husband there to do the right thing for her.
Guilt?? Yeah right.. Lol.
With her blood pressure that high and her being in shock it kinda makes sense she didn't seek medical attention. She probably wasn't in the best state of mind. So scary. I'm glad both mom and baby are okay.
Yep, I’m okay!
@@blakem9131 glad to hear you’re ok!
They should have a spinoff called _I didn't know I was about to be born_ that consists of interviews of babies.
There is a spin off called I still didn't know I was pregnant. I think that's what it is called anyway it's about women who didn't know they were pregnant TWICE
@@icnataliejune84 i believe the saying:
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
Is appropriate here
@@kate3808 I agree
@@kate3808 I mean to not know your pregnant once but TWICE??? Their brain must be go in to a sort of subconscious denial. That must be terrifying and then to have it happened twice absolutely humiliating, people can be s
What would the babies say? I mean the only thing they can tell is what their mom's told them
MDJ- Doesn’t understand why she made that decision.
Also MDJ- No I think I’m ok to drive myself to the hospital in active labor.
Ha! Good point!
They often say that doctors are the worst patients🤷♀️
Hahahaha
Labor turns people crazy, but she had two days to reconsider.
HAHAHAHAHAHA ok that was good
About her falling asleep after, I actually could understand. She probably felt so relieved that everything seemed to be ok, but was too weak to do anything else. I lost so much blood with my first, I passed out when I tried to stand.
this is such an old comment but yeah i understand falling asleep right after too. ive never given birth but ive had severe panic attacks where i was overflowing with adrenaline and exerting a lot of energy, and at the end of them im so exhausted i can barely move. i imagine her birth was incredibly painful and incredibly terrifying, so it makes sense for her to calm down enough to fall asleep after she saw the baby didnt have any obvious issues.
@@bitescratchkill6849I've been there.
I've not gone through a traumatic birth either, just good ole panic attacks.
This could be very true but if she stayed away to tie off and cut the cord and to nurse the baby then she surely could have managed to dial 911 before falling asleep. I feel the shock of everything and her past medial experience was just much for her to handle alone and wanted her husband there for support
This sounds like the shock sent her into a dorsal vagal state, not necessarily shock but a state of inaction or only performing actions that are directly related to survival.
Like when you're depressed, you know you're not well and the right thing is to go to the doctor, you know that you need to do certain things to make yourself feel better but you can just manage to feed yourself and sleep, let alone look after your personal hygiene, other aspects of your health etc.
Yes. Only thing that makes sense. I 100% can see myself choosing to go to sleep versus dealing with calling 911. But, I hope I would call when I awoke.
It took us 6 years to get pregnant.... We are almost 22 weeks with our miracle baby girl. 😍
Congratulations! ❤️
OMG CONGRATS 🥳🎊 do you have any name ideas yet?
3 years!! 22 weeks with my baby girl also!!! God bless you guys💓🥰 pray you have a healthy delivery 💓
Congratulations! My little boy is 4 on 5th August, it took us 5 years. Enjoy every second it goes so quickly x
congrats. Wishing you a healthy babe and easy labour.
Having had severe pre-eclampsia and HELLP Syndrome, and having my blood pressure be through the roof, my liver failing, etc, I can tell you that after my son's birth my cognitive reasoning abilities were at zero while my maternal urge was at maximum. I can absolutely understand her going into a dissassociative state and making incredibly irrational decisions with her blood pressure so high. It's clear that afterward she regretted her decision, but at the time she was probably experiencing something akin to a fugue or dream state.
I wondered if this might be the case and you explained it very reasonably. Combined with her initial reluctance to see a doctor this is even more understandable, scary, and heartbreaking. Even more so because it sounds like she has not had a reason for why she behaved that way, so the guilt would be even more intense.
That may well explain it if it ruined her cognitive capabilities at the time. Probably running on pure primitive instinct.
My exact thoughts. I know for myself I had preeclampsia and was actually hospitalized from 5 months until I delivered at 34 weeks. I was discharged after 3 day but my son was in nicu still so I refused to leave his side. My husband couldn't understand how after being in hospital for so long I didn't want to go outside or how I didn't notice how sick I was becoming. I was standing next to his incubator and passed out I woke up to look down at my legs that were 5 times normal size and they still had to force me to go downstairs to be checked. I was so out of my mind I refused to be treated so the amazing hospital staff placed me and my son in a room together in the nicu to both be treated. Thankfully after a week we were both released and were both perfectly fine but my decision making skills at the time were just awful.
Her reaction also reminds me of someone neuro-atypic. My brother and I are both this way in real life when it comes to decision making. We are somewhat living in a seperate world in our minds and calling to get help from the outside is actually hard for us, even when in extreme pain. I've never been pregnant but somehow I can definitely see myself going in a similar dissociative state of mind and isolate myself, if I were exhausted and as badly in shape as she was with that blood pressure! I would also blame myself very much afterward for not being able to make the right decision, but when it happens it's definitely not by choice! I would definitively NOT call her stupid or dumb! Mental health is very much connected to the body's health and it isnt something we have control over! I like when Dr.Jones says that: "We do what we CAN with the information and means that we have at the moment". That applies to when our cognitive functions are affected to.
yes, what you said Jasmine Mayo
I was a smoker, and I was noticing I was getting super sick after a cigarette... and got even more sick after a few sips of wine. Decided to take a pregnancy test, as I was a week late (which wasn't unusual for me, because I did have a stressful job)... turns out I was pregnant! I was 5 or 6 weeks! Quit smoking right away, and 5 years later still smoke free!
For me it was tea, of all things LOL. My mum and I always made tea in a teapot, had a cup each, and then had a second one. When I declined a second one, it raised red flags for her, and she asked what was going on. I told her I seem to be going off tea a bit. She told me to get straight to the doctors and take a pregnancy test (I don’t think we had the DIY ones at this point). I thought she was joking, until she said that she’d gone off her tea too, about 22 years earlier. So effectively instead of me telling my mum I was pregnant, she told me 😂
My first child was a born at UCLA Medical Center in 1973. It was a long and painful breech birth. I was used as a teaching specimen; It was close to midnight when I was finally ready to deliver and the head OB allowed the outgoing staff and the incoming staff to watch the delivery; rude and humiliating remarks were made by nurses during the delivery. It was a nightmare. I swore I would never have another baby in a hospital. I went on to have two home-births, one at 36 and the other at 41 years old. It was like night and day! I would have had another, but I miscarried,
I can definitely sympathize with anyone not wanting to go to the hospital. To this day I distrust doctors and hospitals. I take very good care of myself to avoid the doctor or hospital as much as possible.
Dang, I'm so sorry you experienced that. No one should have such remarks or humiliation ever. It saddens me that this happens. As a nursing student considering OB, I plan to treat my patients appropriately and advocate for them when not being treated well. It's disgusting how some people can treat others, especially in the medical field when we are supposed to be carrying for others.
MDJ: "I try to be very nonjudgmental with these"
Me: this is why I'm not a doctor
Lmao same
Right!
This lady is stupid.
@@otakuparadise3585 yeah, I wouldn't go so far as to say that she's stupid, just in case she was having a dissociative episode or some other mental health concerns, but I will say MDJ and I yelled "why" at the same time haha
@@patriciastarnes6219 Most likely not educated enough on the pregnancy matters. I wouldn't say she is for sure stupid, as this is a term I usually use more to qualify people that react like you rather than to point out uneducated ones. She's not stupid, she doesn't know. You are though.
I gave birth in the hospital alone. About 45 mins later the nurses came in to check me again and were completely astonished when they saw me holding her. I was only 2cm when they checked me last, so with no epidural I gave birth. I didn't call to let them know because that was a peaceful moment without all the chaos of 3 nurses and a doctor rushing around. I was ok and she was ok and that's all that mattered in that moment.
This video is two years old, but when she said "I didn't take care of myself, now this baby and I are gonna die and it's gonna be all my fault." I just started bawling my eyes out. I cannot imagine out horrific it must have been. Even in ancient times we had mothers, grandmothers, someone trusted with the mother for birth. It got to me, had to share..
I was really traumatised by doctors when I was young and in situations where I felt like I was dying and I had to be forced by my loved ones to go to the hospital. So I understand her completely.
Everyone: Omg I can NOT imagine why she didn't call an ambulance or go to the doctor sooner!
Me, with an anxiety disorder: I mean... I kinda do
Same. I dont go if I'm sick, I'm like eh I'll make it through. Only go if its really bad, like when I had a severe ear infection the pain was so bad I couldnt sleep
@Kat L I think she was in a significant amount of distress combined with extremely high blood pressure, she was definitely not able to think logically and rationally for whatever reason, to call her stupid is unnecessary & rude.
@Kat L I don't agree with what she did but I can see how it turned out the way it did and she is very lucky it ended up ok
@Kat L But you have to understand where she's coming from. Especially doctors often don't take women seriously especially ones of color. I totally understand her not thinking a doctor would do anything to help her.
@Kat L I'm confused you didn't say anything about what? Or are you admitting to not mentioning it in your comment so you understand why it's being addressed?
If her blood pressure was truly that high then likely she was in an extreme state of shock where somehow primal urges to care for the baby were showing through. When I was pregnant, I went into septic shock at 26 weeks. Absolutely no suicidal urges before that point but that day I called my doctor scared because I was driving and felt this urge to drive my car into a semi on the interstate. My heart rate was 190 and I couldn't catch my breath. I was hospitalized for a week and recovered. Ultimately he was born at 31 weeks. He thankfully is a healthy 9month old now.
We do crazy things when we are dying.
Her blood pressure that high makes me wonder why her mother as a nurse did not insist on her going to the hospital asap. That was negligence on her mother's part
@@cathybaldry7822 well the mother did but she just ignored her
Oh my God that's insane. "We do crazy things when we're dying." Summed it up pretty good there. I'm glad you and baby are okay. Congrats 💜
@@mirav9855 yeah, she can't force her to go.
By any chance, were you on antidepressants at the time? I apologize for such a blunt, personal question. I'll try to explain however why I am interested.
It's a widely unknown fact that most anti-depressants can cause this exact situation. It's grossly minimized on the list of potential and serious side effects and is often written as, "sucidal tendencies", "thoughts of harming oneself", "increase in suicidal thoughts or actions" and published statements from manufacturers and professional organizations utilized wording such as, "antidepressants have not been shown to raise the risk of COMPLETED suicide" as a way to mislead the public. Research studies associated with determining whehter antidepressants put people at risk of suicidal thoughts, tendencies or actions were similarly selective in the way applicable data was selected so as to prejudice the results away from showing the truth in just how dangerous these drugs can be (and are).
In order to find the truth, one must read specific statements made by people who have experienced the surreal and terrifying instances in which all of the sudden, they become overwhelmed by thoughts which would lead to them seriously harming, injuring or killing themselves. Often, the experiences are described as though the person feels captive and prevented from being able to circumvent when their body and thoughts take control in performing actions which could directly lead to death. In other words, it's as though they are outside looking in or they are possessed while watching some other nefarious force control their mind and/or body.
I haven't come across anecdotes or experiences from people who have had similar instances when antidepressants are not a potential cause or contributing factor because I haven't yet found any comments or data where antidepressant involvement can be completely ruled out. However, I have come across studies and speculation where stress is presumed to be the factor which results in the aforementioned, sudden, suicidality. I have seen many times when the exact circumstances involve the person feeling the sudden desire, thought process, and/or resultant actions to drive off the side of the road, into a ditch, tree, oncoming traffic or other deadly alternative. Hence why I am curious about your situation.
Congrats on the birth of your child and I'm so glad that you have recovered from the dangerous and scary condition you were in a year ago.
Tbh, I think it definitely could've been shock. I've been in shock before (after being hit by a car) and while I was super focused and could use logic to an extent about some things (like going to my next class and telling them I was going to the office to call an ambulance, so I wouldn't get an unexcused absence) other things, I was completely nuts about. Like, when they told me in the ER that I had broken a couple ribs and one was detatched and 'floating', only connected to where it was supposed to be basically by muscle, I told them 'oh, just take them out'. Uhhh...no, that's not what you do with broken ribs, generally speaking...And while at the time, it felt perfectly reasonable to tell my professor I was going to be missing class and get an office pass and all...looking back, I'm pretty sure that after being hit by a car is not a situation where most people still expect you to show up and explain why you're not going to be there.
So...while I don't think I personally would do what this lady did in the same situation, I can kinda understand it from the perspective that shock can do really wierd things to your cognitive processes that in hindsight make NO sense, but at the time you don't realize it at all, and think you're being perfectly logical.
I would love to know what went through your professor's mind when a student showed up to class after having just been hit by a car. I can't even imagine how I would react in their shoes. I'm glad you made it through, and I hope you recovered well.
I like how zero of these stories that I've seen even mention the placenta coming out. I've never had a child, but from friends who have I've been told that the placenta portion is the bloodiest and most insane part of the delivery (outside of the pain, although one friend said passing the placenta was more painful in her experience). Imagine if that comes flying out of you after birth and you had no idea that this existed in pregnancy at all since almost no one mentions it on tv or other media.
The trauma plus having a blood pressure that high (imagine how high it must have been right after birth) was too much for her brain.
When I have high blood pressure, I do stupid things, and my blood pressure never gets that high.
One time I left a grocery cart mid-store and took the bus home because I felt tired... I had driven there 🤦🏾♀️ I fell asleep for hours.
I woke up, still feeling tired, and went to put the groceries away, but they weren't there. I asked my then boyfriend and he said I only had my purse when I came in, but I was 100% sure I drove to the grocery store and shop around. I thought I must have left the groceries in the car, but my car wasn't there. I called the police to report it stolen. They found the car in front of the grocery store a few hours later. While they were searching, I fell asleep again.
To this day all I remember is going to the store, grabbing the cart, grabbing veggies, fruits, and vaguely remember the meat section on the back, then feeling tired and thinking "when I get home, I'm going to nap" and then I woke up at home. 🤷
We went to the hospital because of my "missing hours" plus I was still super tired and they took my blood pressure and I saw the nurse panicked face. I spent a few days in the hospital until they were able to lower it.
My ex said I looked normal and even said hi to him. I was in a type of shock, but I could do things. I just can't remember any of it.
Shes lucky the baby lived! Otherwise shed probably be on trial for killing it
@@Kriistall7 I know 😞 I don't want to think about that as a possibility.
Agree
Wow. Thank you for pointing that out. That's probably exactly why she was acting like that. You deserve a medical degree. 😊
OMG I had no idea high blood pressure could do that to you, I'm happy you're ok now and this baby story was so crazy wow.
Mike: chest compressions, chest compressions, chest compressions
MDJ: pregnancy test, pregnancy test, pregnancy test
Me: I see you there 😏
😊😊
Lol who is Mike?
@@RoyalHoneyRopesdr Mike varshavaski actually family medicine and model . He also have TH-cam channel . Just like mama doctor jones
@@RoyalHoneyRopes get help if you don't know
Gotta love them both. Great content😊😀😃
Something that struck me with this one is my own experience of being completely paralyzed (not just afraid, but completely paralyzed) at the thought of asking for help, which is a trauma response. It made me wonder what might have happened in her past, from neglect to abuse, that made her feel safer in an insular reaction. I have experienced this myself, in particular related to gynecological and prenatal care. I think the trauma/personal history lens is one the obgyn world could embrace more, I found it completely lacking in my own care when I was pregnant and postpartum.
Yes, Completely lacking in sensitivity to emotional pregnant mothers. I had 2 small children and didn’t know I was pregnant with #3 until I felt a baby kicking @ 4 - 5 months, periods has not returned after birth of #2..who was then 8 mos old. I coukd not work and my husband got laid off….hard times 50+ yrs ago..so I sought prenatal care from Womens clinic @ public hospital. basically welfare. i had never been in that economic level before, always worked.
All the women @ cllinic were treated as low class. I was told that only the irresponsible and or mentally retarded had more than 2 children…and didn’t I want to give my baby for adoption? After that I was wary that they would try to take my baby away. I went into hospital in labor @ the change if shift hour in the labor and delivery ward. They put me in an exam room, locked me in, told me to undress, put on a giwn abd get upnon the table..I was in hard labor and could not climb up to table..or tske off my boots..it was winter snd the room was cold., with no wibdow,call light, or chair or pilliow or blanket.Nobody came back. I was alone, locked in and in hard kabor for what seemed hours…I was standing up, unable to lie down or sit..afraid I would have my baby on the floor. When the door opened, a nurse said
..what are you doing here, how did you get in here, who are you? I didn’t know anyone was in this room… As they rushed me to delivery room, the Dr asked me if wanted to give my baby up..again ( another Dr this time) No way, and I could hardly wait to get out of that hospital and never ever went back as a patient. I got a taste of what minorities and poor have to endure. And I was afraid, and felt so vulnerable and helpless.
@@prarieborn6458 I'm so sorry that happened to you.
Your insight makes a lot of sense. I've been reading about trauma--including sexual trauma--recently and this can certainly be a type of maladaptive response.
As a woman with PCOS in a lot of online groups of other women with PCOS, giving up on talking to doctors because they almost never take us seriously is very common.
Exactly and doctors and nurses like her will just tell us to trust them...unless they're stupid even they must realise(if they're a good doctor etc) they're a rare breed. If they don't think so they're delusional most people DONT have good doctors.
Honestly, I can completely understand why she didn't call for help after giving birth. She had just gone through an enormous shock and trauma, and was also physically very ill, so she was likely not thinking clearly. On top of that, she likely had fears that if she went to the hospital and they learned that she had been drinking, smoking, not getting prenatal care, etc., that they may take her son away from her. Or perhaps she was afraid that if she went to the hospital, that she would find out there was something wrong with her baby, whereas if she simply stayed with him at home she could stay in blissful ignorance, and just have a perfect little fairy tale of her and her baby. Taking all of that into consideration, and throwing in possible depression or anxiety, I'm not terribly shocked that she did what she did--although it was extremely dangerous and she absolutely should have called 911 immediately. But the brain is a funny thing. And we humans can rationalize just about anything if we really want to.
Well put those were my exact thoughts poor lady went through an extremely traumatic experience and wasn’t thinking straight
I was just going to comment exactly that😅🙏🏼
Well clearly she went into shock and probably dissociated due to trauma. The brain is a funny thing indeed. We never know what our response is to trauma untill it happens and we're at that juncture. This is a crazy story though. She even says she does not know why her response was to just be with him and not call 911 right away eventhough she was worried about him. She clearly went into some kind of shock imo.
I think this makes more sense than any other reply.
She is not SMART enough to even be able to keep that baby. She endangered his life by not getting medical attention
My guess is that everyone here is right:
1. No insurance and also being taught from a young age to never go to a doctor unless you have no choice. Losing literally everything because of medical bills is a real thing.
2. Extreme negative past experiences with the medical system. Many women with PCOS and all kinds of other conditions are told that they are being dramatic and their pain isn't that bad.
3. A dissociative episode caused by the severe trauma. That could easily make it so that she couldn't think through the situation well enough to realize that this is actually one of the times that she does need to go to the ER. Even totally healthy people can experience dissociation in any kind of traumatic situation. She might have "needed to" dissociate to cope with the pain that she was too afraid to go to the doctor for.
In my opinion, that is a huge event to dissociate from without any prior dissociation. Typically for an adult to dissociate such a huge event, they would have probably had prior dissociative amnesic events and/or a dissociative disorder. Your body only dissociates as a last resort and develops over time, essentially when the person has no physical way out. Typically seen in repeated trauma. I think this would only be seen in dissociative amnesia/fugue/or identity disorder. Possibly could just be severe PTSD, but again, that would almost have to be a “trained” response for the brain. I’d think, anyway.
The issue I have with that is that her mother in a nurse. People who have a nurse for a mother are usually not distrustful of the medical system, and I doubt her mother taught not to go to the doctor unless she had no choice.
Respectfully beg to differ. Dissociation is not uncommon with labour, even for first time labour without severe prior trauma. Some women don't even remember their pushing phase or remember seeing themselves from above or suddenly don't have pain anymore.
Jenny Jen1010 my grandmother was a nurse and even she doesn’t trust doctors. She did until she had her own medical issues and watched my mom go through other issues and saw how often both of them were dismissed and passed off. Like for certain things she’s ok with stuff others might not be, like having medical students shadowing her doctor or an intern working on her, but when it comes to actually being looked at she doesn’t trust that anyone even the actual doctors will listen to her
@@JennyT101 My mom is a nurse and I am pre-med. I am still highly distrustful of the medical system after being mistreated and ignored by doctors all my life. I have POTS and general dysautonomia, chronic conditions that can be utterly debilitating. I am going into the medical field to change it, but that doesn't mean I trust the existing system. I've had too many terrible ER visits where I was brushed off as seeking drugs when all I wanted was something to stop the constant palpitations I was having because my body's internal electricity wouldn't play nice. I can absolutely understand this woman having so much trauma from constant mistreatment by medical "professionals" that she wouldn't trust them with her child. Additionally, the added trauma of an unexpected birth would likely highten the fear and I think it's likely she suffered a dissociative event as a result.
13 years of trying to conceive and it took a toll on me mentally. However, when we least expected it.. surprise your pregnant! I just turned 17 weeks and pray for a happy healthy baby in April.
Good luck!!!
I hope you had a successful pregnancy and you've got that wee bundle in your arms now. Wrapping you with love if that wasn't your outcome xxx
I think it's a little strange no one brought up Post Partup Depression as a reason for the over attachment; she didn't know she was pregnant, but her body did, meaning that sudden hormone change still occurs and she could still feel the symptoms.
6:53 "If you are sexually active with someone who can get you pregnant" - Love the subtle inclusive language you us in your videos
I was thinking the same thing 💙
As a trans man with a trans girlfriend, I appreciate it so much 🥰 what I need to work on is fear of being judged when I buy a test 😩
I also love her endorsing dollar store tests. I keep telling my friends they can't sell them if they actually don't work, that would be a lawsuit waiting to happen.
Price shouldn't be a barrier to accurate tests.
I also loved this.
@@atlasbees have your girlfriend buy the test for you! Easy
The thing I kept hearing her say was that she hadn't care of herself. I almost wonder if she was afraid others would find her to be unfit and take her baby from her. After my son was born, I remember thinking that someone was going to take my baby away from me every time something was not happening perfectly. I remember talking to the nurse during a well-check call about my son having a crying fit the second night we were home for 4 hours where he wouldn't eat or sleep or settle. There was this tone of accusation in her voice that really set off irrational thoughts in my mind. Considering they were having so much trouble, I would imagine that she was terrified to lose her baby, even if her actions were actually risking his life more.
This is a great point. Thank you.
I had the exact same thoughts when my child was born. I blame the hormones for all of my overreacting at that time.
Yes.. I can empathize with that. I had twins when I was 20 years old. They were 6 weeks early but thankfully born healthy. I was trying to nurse every two hours and recover from a c-section.. family and friends would offer to help but I refused.. I thought that if I asked for help they would think that I couldn’t handle being a mom and take my babies away. I was miserable... I would just cry and cry...I ended up having postpartum depression. I got professional help and got better. Cant believe my babies are 18 now 😭💕
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
This is a great comment. I never would have thought about the fact that she might have been afraid of losing her baby. I'm sorry for your experience.
Why did the narrator say they had struggled to conceive "In spite of" her PCOS? Shouldn't he say because of her PCOS?
They struggled to conceive while she was smoking a pack a day too!
I really love that this is what concerns you with this video.
@@rainyrainold I really love that you love that, sir.
I really hope she's well mentally and has all the support she needs
Yeah, I think that perhaps she needed some additional support. Even when recounting her story you could feel that perhaps she wasn't in the best of health. I say this as someone who has had mental unwellness myself.
It is almost like she was scared it wasn't real so she didn't tell anyone so her fantasy wouldn't get ruined
The way her husband immediately thought she had obtained a baby speaks volumes...
To be fair, it's not that weird of a reaction when you consider he didn't think she was pregnant and suddenly he comes home and sees her with a baby.
Dam😂😂😂😂😂😂
U better understanding then her
U should have told this story
That’s a good point and makes sense. Bc she said several times she couldn’t believe it was real.
It could also be that the longer she waits to go to the hospital the longer she had to believe that there is nothing wrong with him. She’s basically procrastinating.
Having bipolar disorder, I can just imagine being manic and just being like "ok, cool, baby. haha wait till greg sees this" "I don't really feel like making a doctor's appointment so I won't"
ME .
Oh same.
yeet my waffles I feel bad for laughing but “haha wait till Greg sees this” made my day
Same
Same
I love how the mother reacts when he was born. She was calm and collected. Motherly instincts definitely were there
My guess is the combination of shock, blood pressure, distrust and my personal theory depression, made her unable to seek medical attention. Personally I know that depression can result in not taking care of yourself when you know you should and if she had bad experiences beforehand I can see why initially she would just feel unable to go and later after the initial shock, the guilt sets in and she doesn’t want to face the reality.
Maybe she was acting odd because she couldn't think clearly with such high blood pressure? Great video as always MDJ
That's what I was wondering. If her BP was so high, maybe her thought process was a little off.
That's what I thought. I'm glad she didnt have a stroke during delivery.
This seems plausable, she might have been very muddled.
I though that as well.
@UCZTuDXPUqt8KG1CY43yMn8Q yeah no. I don't blame anyone with pcos/endo for not trusting doctors at all. they're generally treated poorly, not taken seriously, and have their concerns dismissed.
The only thing I could think of is that she's had such a bad experience with the medical field that she just did not trust them anymore
But, she did not even call her mom, a nurse.
@@debrasedgwick4697 or her freaking HUSBAND!!! like whaaaaaat??!
I think she was probably just in shock and it made her hyper focus on the baby
I hypothesize shock plus that high a blood pressure doesn't deliver good decision making.
My anxiety is so bad I hate bothering people when I had a bulging disk I didn’t tell my mom till I couldn’t physically walk and was doubled over in pain so I kinda get why she didn’t say anything
Her: "I couldn't sleep so at 1:00 I finally decided..."
Me: oh good shes gonna go to the ER
Her: "...to finish packing"
Me: Seriously
I know this is an old post, but I just saw it and want to comment. I have been a labor and delivery nurse for 30 years and I have another possible explanation for this Mom's behavior, which is recreational drug use. It explains her odd behavior during the pregnancy, birth and after. Cocaine, for example, can contribute to high blood pressure, premature birth, and low birth weight as well as placental abruption. The weird behavior of not getting help after the birth could have been fear that her drug use would be found out and she could "get in trouble" and maybe even lose custody of the baby. I've seen patients who knew they were pregnant, but did not get pre-natal care because of those fears. Some came in with emergency complications related to drug use.
Exactly my thoughts when I saw this episode! I 100% agree with you!!
@@nadeaner.cowley513 Thank you! I thought I was the only one thinking this.
My instincts, too, that it was guilt and fear of having something exposed, on some level, maybe at that level. (Not to being judgmental, though,)
Honestly i sat and thought the same.. Or something like a mental health problem..
I mean her own husband were in chock and straight out asked if she had stolen the baby, which could implicate that he could believe that it was something she was capable of.
Her behavior is very, weird and sounded like what i would expect form a mother who expected that she would get separated from the child :/
Luckily that did not happen and i hope they are doing well
This was one of my first thoughts too.
Sounds like she had a dissociative episode where the perfect life in her head was possible for a little while
Felt that in my soul but I hope that never happens to me. I would be so scared in the end.
Feel that lol. I have dissociative identity disorder but it would never go this far (and I’d never get pregnant and not know lmfao). Reality does get mixed up with dreams and day dreams a ton though, keep in mind it’s always small things, such as, I cleaned that! Wait, was that a dream? (might be more of a PTSD thing though, but DID is a trauma disorder and every person with DID has PTSD or CPTSD). A lot of people with DID also maladaptive daydream-ever heard of someone with DID talk about an inner world? Inner worlds are created from excessive daydream and/or meditation. I mean I guess if the situation is set up like that (someone somehow manages to give birth while not knowing they’re pregnant) it is possible because it would be such a traumatic situation to handle alone.
@@cookiechaina1238 I have DID and MADD so I understand what your saying and I agree. Her case feels more like PTSD to me. Maybe a little bit dissociation from the shock but my heart still goes out to her. Shock is scary as well as PTSD and dissociation.
I wonder if her high blood pressure contributed to her thought processes too.
Or she could have been ignored and told shes crazy and her pain was fake for years. I've had that happen, I have pcos and endometriosis and have been written off for years until I finally found a dr to take me seriously
MDJ your absolute empathy when hearing how that woman never called for help... You can hear so clearly that the show was shaming her for being "stupid" or "ignorant" or whatever else, but you listened deeper than that and understood that there was a real reason for her decision.
Beyond just understanding it, you stopped the video and articulated the reality for so many patients with PCOS.
Right there are so many people in the comments calling her stupid for not calling a doctor the first time and not calling anyone when she was in extreme pain a couple days later. One even accused her of possibly being a druggie and not wanting the results to show up on a test.
Graves Or Hoshimotos can affect mental health
I use to work for a dentist. He had a policy that anyone getting anesthetic had their blood pressure first. There was a gentleman that had super high blood pressure and he was so mad at my boss for not just doing his dental work. But also insisting he went straight to the emergency room. Apparently the patient called back and told him he saved his life. He had some kind of event at the emergency room.
I think it had to do with feeling shock and it's also surreal, because when you can get pregnant and are suddenly faced with a baby, it's a whole new level of shock. Like she can't break the "spell" of actually having a baby in her arms.
Honestly, I had the same reaction the father had: That woman stole a baby! But I assume the doctors who checked her out confirmed she had just given birth, and maybe the father had a DNA test done?
Same!! I thought maybe I was watching the prequel to a @kendallrae video.
When we see that two year old at the end, he's 100% that dad's child!
@@meledder Thankyou ☺
At 2 days his cord stump would still be attached, lactation and a quick peek inside her would verify recent birth, but they probably did do a test and just didn't mention it in the show.
Mama Doctor Jones yess I was thinking that too lol
If the husbands first though is "did she take someones baby..." I question her mental stability. I hope she's getting more comprehensive help.
100% agree. Sounds like she 100% stole that baby. And the fact that her husband’s first thought was the same kind of clues you in on her mental state.
I don’t think his first thought was “did she take the baby” it was “who’s baby is this/where did this baby come from” which makes sense if your wife who wasn’t pregnant (to your knowledge) suddenly shows up with a baby
I was looking for this comment! Her husband thought she stole someone's baby?! WTF? If your husband thinks you're capable of something like that, there's a problem!
Jessica Mabry mate I'd be like wtf too u believe your wife is incapable of having children u come home and she's holding a baby claiming it's her
Well I mean what else was he supposed to think when he comes home and his wife is holding a bay she says is theirs but he didn't even no she was pregnant.
My first instinct would be that she was avoiding calling a doctor because she was afraid to find out if she had caused him any serious problems. She said that was her biggest concern and after smoking during pregnancy and now being gone through something so traumatising that makes a lot of sense. And because she didn't trust doctors to make anything better, just to tell you what's wrong and that they can't do anything about it, that would have been the only thing on her mind and the potential help just a far away possibility that didn't seem rational to her.
Or she just does not like doctors and wanted to have some quality time alone with her new child.
I completely understand this as someone who has gone to the ER many times to get help. Finally 12 years later I have found something who discovered I have PCOS and thyroid problems. Up until then everyone would just blame my weight. I remember one time I went in just gushing blood and had been bleeding for 3 months, had been passing out. they did nothing but give me iron and sent home to rest.
I think the motherly instinct still made her care for the baby despite being in shock. I think a mothers instinct is one of the strongest things on earth
also btw i would asume that she may have wanted to just stay in a moment of themselves.
We don't have instincts anymore, so maternal instinct isn't a thing, sorry
@@asadd_the_good7604 sorry but this is one of the dumbest things i ever heard. Even if we don't have the same instincts we had we still have instincts...
no, it's actually been scientifically proved that we don't have instincts, look it up. We still have reflexes, but it's a different thing
@@asadd_the_good7604 the only thing I found when I looked it up was evidence that it actually is real (examples include the instinctual fear of snakes humans have, tribal loyalty, greed, etc) so you might need to share the sources for your own claim here buddy
Honestly...I kind of get it. I've never had a kid, but I did get hit by a car. My first thoughts were "something's broken or I'm dead" and then when I was not dead and nothing was broken, I literally walked it off (I was a block from my house) and then went home, had my roommate get some gravel out of my head, found my water bottle when I realized it was missing, tried to do homework and went tf to sleep. I had the person's contact info (she insisted on driving me part way), but I never filed a report, or even followed up to get reimbursed for the backpack that got destroyed. I went to my university clinic a day later and had whiplash. So I can totally understand how during labor you have all this time to think about your choices & being in pain, and running on adrenaline. But once you're not dead and no one else is, it's like you have permission to stop worrying. So you chill out, take a nap, and then things are still fine, so why go to a doctor. They didn't help you before!
Which is a concerning attitude but it makes sense.
And why go somewhere to do paperwork if you're fine? ;) Of course feeling fine and being fine aren't the same in this case.
I think the same way-not a good way to think but my brain processes things when it has adrenaline in it in a crazy way
I have had a similar experience when I was out for a run early in the morning about 2 years ago. A stupid guy with an old black Mitsubishi was driving without his lights on so I didn't see him, ended up getting nudged by the car if that makes sense and I split my entire knee open (to make things worse the hospital didn't have crutches in my size either so I had to keep waddling in excruciating pain and I couldn't be admitted because of our medical aid not paying for it and it wasn't bad enough for that although my pain management was so bad that I vommed and collapsed at a stage). I honestly thought I was going to die in the few moments that I was flying through the air before I hit the tarmac. Funnily enough, I still find little pieces of gravel and glass that have worked their way to the top layer of my skin 2 years later. It was the worst pain and emotional trauma ever (coming from someone with mild childhood PTSD because of illness and stupid doctors). To add on, the idiot just sped away and he didn't have visible number plates either so I never filed anything against him.
Reminds me when a semi forced me off the road and into a sign. I spun and the back hit the sign. People came and asked if I was okay, I told them I was fine. I had a pizza so there was pizza sauce on me. I told them it was just pizza sauce and I went to work. My coworkers were in shock and asked if they should call my parents and I said no. I accidently left the car on so my parents found out about the crash the next day. It was shock and fear.
I was "hit" by a car walking across my college campus - I thought they saw me and were stopping at the stop sign but they started to roll so the tire went over the tip of my shoe and the wing mirror hit me in the gut - and I hit the car back with my hand, then walked behind the car and to band practice. It's like my brain couldn't process it. Went straight to the band office and asked for an ice pack cause my foot hurt. They asked what happened and I just very casually went "Oh, I got hit by a car" and everyone stared at me like I was nuts. They asked me if I was ok and I responded "Yeah, except my foot hurts, but I walked here on it so it's not broken". Band members kept coming up to me to ask if I was ok during practice and I was mildly confused why everyone was so concerned. It wasn't until the next day that I was like "I got hit by a car and just went to band practice? What was I thinking?" Like I didn't get the person's info or anything. Luckily I was fine.
I feel that mistrust! The last time I was in server pain I waited until I couldn’t take it anymore. I’d given birth naturally twice I was in my second trimester. I only went because I was worried about my baby. When I got the ER, they treated me like I just wanted drugs. It was the worst and is costing me with insurance $2000. It was a waste! I hate the hospital and doctors. Most doctors are always so cold and don’t listen. I had to need one doctor to run a more intense test for thyroid problems because it runs in my family and only showed up on the second test.
I had my period with my ectopic pregnancy. I found out I was pregnant a week after my period. They asked me when my LMC was and I had to be like "so here's the thing...." Currently on pregnancy #2 and haven't had a hint of bleeding the entire time
Could it be that her extremely high blood pressure caused confusion, personality changes, etc.?
That combined her bad experiences. Mistrust holds strong in some people, I would know.
This was my thought exactly. Makes perfect sense to me.
she said the doctor said she was probably in shock but i’d believe there were issues deeper than what’s being shown... she reminds me of an addict. and her husband saying she smoked almost a pack of cigarettes a day supports that
@@misseselise3864 an addiction to cigarettes is different than being "an addict" but go off. Bad take.
Event without that I could see there being a lot of shame and embarrassment for her. Shame because that person told her to go to the doctor and she ignored, embarrassment because she thought she couldn't get pregnant so never thought to test.
"You don't have to cut the cord right away." THANK YOU!!!! Everyone stresses about the cord in precipitous birth situations. Unless it's an extremely rare situation of the cord impeding the baby from breathing outside the womb, there's no reason to rush to cutting the cord. With everything else going on, that's seriously not important.
How long can is it ok for it to stay attached to both?
Exactly!!! Delayed cord clamping is the only way to go! So many health benefits for the baby too!!
@@chipod6254 a long time. Look into lotus births. Many people leave it until it stops pulsing (around 10 minutes) but some even leave it until the placenta has been delivered. That's what we do.
I dont know why doctors push c-sections either. Its normal and natural for baby to come through the vagina. Lots of health benfits to that too.
@@misskayla860 there’s pros and cons to both. The doctor likely takes into account that particular circumstance. At least are supposed to.
People calling her stupid. Women give birth at home every day. She was in shock. Why are y’all to tell someone how to deal with shock
As a nurse I have noticed people with blood pressure that high tend to be unable to make great decisions .
"If your periods change and you've been sexually active... with someone who can get you pregnant" - I see what you did there, Dr Jones xDDD I remember that comment under one of your videos:
- If you're sexually active and something goes off, get a test.
- I'm a lesbian.
- Okay, you can get a pass.
Also covers cis lesbians that have trans partners so perfect wording
MDJ is a pretty stellar example of the kinds of good folks we need. (I was gonna say in medicine, but let's be honest, we need folks like her in every aspect of life.)
Now that I've had a baby, I'm laughing at how old that baby is. No wonder people have such a distorted view of what it's like to have a newborn!
well, honestly speaking it's too dangerous to have a newborn child just for you to film a video/series/movie with them. So I'm not offended every movie gets that wrong. It's not THAT important part to portray considering everything.
Watch the BBC series Call The Midwife! Most of the babies are very young, if not newborn!
@@LizzyCarrone9 so? Does it worth it? I don't know about the risks for it. But I might talk about benefits - I don't see a problem with casting a bit older baby than it should be. Viewer will understand the story anyway. And it's not a "harmful lie". Regular person most probably won't be in a situation where he or she will need to spot a difference between age of babies. If they are not a medical professional, but in this case they will learn it without movies and series.
I get why is it bad to show the code blue wrong (it's also much less risky to show it right against wrong). But the babies age? Nah.
I know useless facts so one to share is that there are laws against using newborn babies in filming similar to typical child labor laws. Typically they must be over a month old (varies by state). So the film industrys work around is casting premature babies so that they technically meet guidelines but are of average newborn size. There's documentaries about it.
Not the worst I’ve seen. I rented a film once (an absolute horrid one - some sort of post apocalyptic scenario where everyone was made sterile somehow, and so this pregnant woman was being sought after as the carrier of the antichrist or something) and the “baby” was definitely well over 6 months when it was born 😂 like my word, that’d be painful to push out of there!
It is possible she was in shock for that few days. When I heard a friend of my died suddenly age 30, I cried in private, but couldn't bring myself to tell anyone over the phone. Only when my mom came over to drop something of I told her.
So I get the feeling. Still not smart if you know you need medical care though.
For me, I can only fathom that after suffering with infertility she thought if someone interferes what if she doesn’t get to keep the baby...like mentally/psychologically she desired being a mother SO MUCH and no one else was around when she gave birth to this baby...it was just her and her son and she wanted this SO MUCH...she just didn’t want this amazing miraculous situation to end and honestly I could see myself reacting that way before I had my 3 children if I had not known I was pregnant and then BAM gave birth 😳But not after giving birth to just my first child, or even just after going into labor with my first child like the maternal instincts kick in and baby’s well being is priority #1. I would have been more terrified of my baby not being healthy than of anything else by that point. Not passing judgement whatsoever on this lady though because I have never been in those shoes. I’m just so so grateful on behalf of this family that mama and baby are safe and healthy! That could have turned out so badly 😣
😂😂😂 I spit out my apple juice laughing when she said " Even with medical assistance she is having a baby "
Whether it's PTSD from a previous medical experience or anxiety or paranoia I don't know, but it feels like a mental health component could explain why she could be fearful of what might have happened to her and the baby and also fearful of calling anyone.
Good point! 👀
Absolutely, or maybe even addicted to something, not wanting to face judgement from hospital staff
Also, hormones are a strange thing. When my kid was born I was sure she'd be taken away because I once let her nap for 4 hours straight even when I'd been advised to feed her every 3 hours. (Edit. And I definitely blame the hormones for overreacting like that!)
I guess if I'd had a baby not knowing I was pregnant I might have been scared the baby would be taken away or the medical staff judging me because I hadn't taken care of us during pregnancy.
Elaine Eason that’s kind of out of nowhere, unless you’re talking about her smoking (if you are, then yeah, i could see her being scared that since she smoked while pregnant they’d take her baby away)
@@Lucy-fn9rj I am only speculating, as it is a common reason why women are scared to seek medical care for pregnancy.
You don’t have to be traumatized by doctors to feel more confident in taking care of yourself than going to a hospital... just constantly dismissed and told your pain is no big deal.
Being gaslit by a professional IS truama
@@RonryAsAlwaysit didn't have to be a doctor or nurse though
I’m so glad you’re so compassionate to these people and give them the benefit of the doubt
7:37
She:and that's when I saw a head....
My brain:well...at least it's not a foot😂
I see you’ve been around the channel a while. 😆😆
Same! I was hoping she wouldn't say she saw a foot. I was preparing myself 😅
I wonder if these stories in the show always end well? I mean, did they ever do an episode, where the mommy or the baby didn't make it a 100% ok? Because in real life half, if not more, of these would end up in some kind of trauma/injury/illness to one ore both mommy and/or baby. Just think of a woman drinking and smoking all through her pregnancy or taking ibuprophen or other medications, or the baby would fall on the floor durring delivery. SO MUCH can go wrong...
@@irinakl441 Ikr
Mood
I understand her confusion. When I went in for what I thought was “stomach flu” it turned out my blood pressure was 210/180. I was hospitalized and it took me about 12 hours to have my daughter. She was born 10 weeks premature. Up until she came out I kept thinking I was going to go home fine. I didn’t feel that sick at all, but my brain was just not working right.
Whoaaaaa
Lol one minute u got a stomach flu and the next u got a baby! Congratulations!😂❤❤❤❤❤
@@evierice2230 nobody asked to be preached at.
High blood pressure can make a person very ditzy and mentally confused. It can become difficult for a person to make logical choices or form new memories. I think it is one of the reasons people sometimes delay seeking help for blood pressure issues.
My folks and I have a drinking game for shows like this. Take a shot of water whenever the narrator says 'disturbing'. Great way to stay hydrated when you binge this kind of show lol
I just discovered you from Jamidodger's channel and I'm OBSESSED with these episodes. I didn't even know this show existed! i need to look into it.
As someone who spent years in pain and doctors claiming I was lying, looking for drugs, or “being dramatic”... I completely understand her reluctance to go to the hospital or call for help. You know you’ll sit there for hours, you know you’ll have to explain your whole health history, and there’s a real possibility that you’ll do all that and just be told “there’s nothing wrong with you” or “have you tried Advil?” and sent home. I get it.
And I understand not thinking right after giving birth. She was in shock. I went into labor so fast that my body didn’t have time to adjust. From start to finish, my labor and birth took 2 hours. I was so out of it after the birth that I didn’t know what was going on. For days l wasn’t thinking clearly and couldn’t have made ANY important decisions during that time.
All my labors are fast too, but my 3rd was 2 hours like yours and I was literally out of my mind for the next few days. That poor woman!
I have fibromyalgia and gey treated like a drug attack. I never did drugs. Livibg with this pain. i don't know if my organ failing, etc. My body hurts everyday.
Yep! Went to ER in the most incredible pain. Doctor told me because “he” had a pulled muscle before he knew the kind of pain I was in😒. Gave me pain meds and sent me home(FRIDAY). Sunday morning I get a call from ER, that I needed to come back in🤣😂! Well, that pain I had was a rare cancer 😳. After surgery,and monthly treatments I’m still here, and so is my cancer 🤦🏾♀️. So doctors, I beg of you to pay attention to women when we complain ( we don’t do it until we have to) 💜🦓🦄
Ugh, yes. I have ADHD and have been accused of drug seeking when I requested a prescription change. It ruined psychologists for me forever. I'm terrified to ever go to one again.
@@sherriemyles2776 OMFG!! I'm so sorry that folks in the medical field treated you like that! Nobody with fibromyalgia fakes that kind of pain!!
Stories like these are why I take a pregnancy test every couple of months even though I have an IUD! 😳
Haven't watched the video yet but my sister got pregnant with an IUD and didn't know for 20 weeks!
I'm not even sexually active and I kind of feel like I should be worried.
@@ArsonBeanTanks One of my friends just had her IUD removed because she found out she was pregnant! Has me terrified it's going to happen to me even though they only have something like a .4% failure rate.
@@skylarjohnson7779 Mood.
Right!!!! I’m on depo and I’m still paranoid about getting pregnant. I’d get a hysterectomy if a doctor would perform it on me (I’m only 24)
When I had my first baby, thank god I was at a hospital, because I was in no head space to either ask for help or communicate with anyone or make any decisions. I knew I was pregnant the entire 9 months and I knew I was having the baby that day (ish) because my water broke, and yet I was in such shock, the whole experience was so new and I am pretty sure I hiperventilated over and over due to the constant surges all through out 24 hs of labour, so I was exhausted. This woman was in labour for 48 hs? I can totally imagine then not acting right away other than with her instinct of nursing the baby... I think I would have asked for help though after resting at least
I was in labor 3 days
Ive had an ovairan cyst rupture two times - the second time I stayed home and writhed on the floor alone for hours until it subsided. When I went to emergency the first time they treated me like I was drug seeking or something and once I finally got in a room I was left alone from 11 pm to I believe 8 am. I was throwing up from pain but no one helped. By the time anyone saw me the pain had subsided for an hour at that point. Got an ultrasound and was told there was fluid like a cyst ruptured. Thats why I didnt go when I needed to the second time even though a ruptured cyst is the worst pain I've felt in my life.
she didnt want to say mistrust of medical system on tv
She might have actually said that was a reason but they could have edited around it. Who knows how much they edit out of these.
Her stood there saying “hi honey, look at our baby” is straight from a psychological thriller. So creepy.
I love your commentary! lol I loved watching this show whenever I could and so this is just the bomb for me
This video is so so so relatable as someone with adenomyosis. 5 years post hysterectomy and I still just ride ovarian cysts out at home. So often I was bedridden from laborlike contractions and never even telling anyone. And every time I'd gone to ER I was treated poorly- I was always sooo scared of this
Maybe she's like the rest of us and terrified of her deductible, after all many of us are 1 ER trip away from financial disaster anyway.
Or maybe even uninsured
I can understand this if it was just her health, but once she gave birth to a baby, I would hope to God the HEALTH AND SAFETY of her baby that she thought for so long she couldn't have would trump the fear of a deductible! I mean come on. If I was her child I would be horribly pissed that she played roulette with my health for two whole days just "because she didn't want to go"
@@Scott_From_Canada you obviously have never been broke. I have and I know this is the worst fear that you wouldn't be able to feed yourself or your children. And yes I feared going to doctors at that time even for serious health issues. Thankfully, I'm here alive and well. People did this childbirth thing without doctors and hospitals for thousands of years without any medical assistance at all
@@EvgeniyaJZ It's heartbreaking how people go broke and get sicker because they still deny you a basic human right. Hopefully in 4 years you'll do better and pick a progressive nominee.
@@siracastori01 in the US, I don't think this will ever change no matter who is in the White house. Until there's a universal healthcare, covered 100% for all (at least citizens only!) , no deductibles /in or out of network, no co-pays, no exclusions, no preexisting conditions etc, people will suffer like this.
The mix of shock and trauma she just went into autopilot and she just kinda knew “feed care I have a baby somehow”
I said true, then again when I was pregnant with my oldest son I had bleeding every month for over half my pregnancy. My constant visits to the hospital helped me find my OB, she was amazing though even she was puzzled by my bleeding, but he was fine and came out healthy and I haven't had that happen since him.
There are so many different reactions people have to trauma and unexpected situations, I'm not surprised she didn't tell anyone, but I'm a little surprised she waited dayS.
Yah that’s the thing. Like if she had napped then called or at least told her husband or mom, but 2 days while saying you knew baby was in danger is very odd to me!!
@@MamaDoctorJones Thank you for your reply! Loved the episode (and all your vids!).
www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/a44sp/per_request_i_am_a_woman_who_didnt_know_she_was/?
I found a reddit ama from Tiffany explaining that the show cut out crucial information to make it sound more dramatic.
I think it was because of the high blood pressure that explains the taking a nap too.
@@spicecatz Thank you for that, its nice to know more about it from the woman herself.
Maybe she was mentally confused because of the blood pressure. Her still being able to take care of the baby was her instinct taking over. Just a thought. Adrenaline makes our bodies do amazing things.
There is no mother instinct. This is a myth
@@mirofeya that is not true
@@mirofeya there absolutely is.
@@mirofeya Not true at all. Woman are evolved to wake up to babies cry, deliver them and care for them. The mother myth is not a myth, it's just fact. If you have a kid or not but if you did you would not be saying this. Mother instinct is real some ppl even get adrenaline to get strength to help their babies. Nowadays the worst that can happen is an attack and being under cars. But back then it was real dangerous predators, Miss me with that bull crap.
@@mirofeya you are clueless
Wow! I am so happy that she finally got to the hospital when her husband got home.
Thank goodness that her and their baby is ok
I'm from Germany and here it's called "Plötzlich Mutter". I watched this episode and it was so crazy to me. I'm so happy for the family that the little boy survived and that he's healthy. Wishing the best for them
Am I the only one that’s wondering what she did with the placenta??? 😂
Definitely not alone! Where'd the afterbirth go?!
Nope. They don’t just disappear......
I just commented on that, did she eat it or something? 😂🤷
@@fulanadetal7710 That is actually what some mothers will do. Apparently it helps with postpartum depression. But they cook it into something not just raw lol
@@texturewalk I know, that's why I mentioned it lol
This lady obviously was suffering from CPTSD from her previous medical procedures. It is not uncommon for trauma victims to have severe aversion to going to the hospital. This sounds like a classic case of trauma induced shock with dissociative psychosis. She endured a birth alone at home without support. Most likely assumed she was passing a mass or blood clot due to her polycystic ovary disease. This in itself would be difficult and painful. But somewhere during this she realised she was giving birth. That had to be shocking and traumatic. She acted calmly, knew enough to tie off the cord and get her baby to her breast. Then did the emotionally intuitive, instinctual thing. She took her baby to bed with her and nursed him. Let's not forget what an accomplishment this is. Birth is physically hard work. She was exhausted and emotionally spent and went to bed with her Baby. It is pretty clear that this couple deeply love and care for this much wanted child. All those infertility treatments and the years of longing for a Baby take a toll.
It is not uncommon for trauma survivors to be out of touch with their bodies. It is quite possible she did not realise she was pregnant. I have seen this before where a young woman ( and her doctor!) thought she had a cyst in her ovary. Then after ultrasound it was discovered that she was pregnant. It is difficult for most people to understand when this happens. We ask questions like " How could she not know she was pregnant?" My answer is in most of these cases there has been previous trauma and the woman is cut off from her own body sensations. Often the woman is overweight, and the added weight of pregnancy goes unnoticed. Add to that a history of painful periods, cramping or polycystic ovary syndrome. And a woman who has endured multiple invasive medical procedures.
Under the best of circumstances birth can be frightening and physically and emotionally traumatic. No matter how much you educate your Self and plan, the birth of your first child is physically hard work. This lady clearly thought she was just passing a mass or blood clot. And discovered she was giving birth. I think we need to be very gentle with her and not judge and trust that he did the very best she could at the time. I am so very thankful that she and her baby had a positive outcome. I will be praying that God would bless the parents with another child if that is their heart's desire. I am sending love and hugs from Washington State, USA, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR.
@Laura South , you are very welcome. I think we need to assume the best about people and respect the process of Birth. Birth is a sacred act and we need to return to honouring it as a naturally occurring normal healthy bodily function. Birth is not a disease that needs to be managed by machines. As we have moved away from planned home birth with trained midwives we have embraced multiple interventions that have stripped us of compassion and empathy for Birthing women and their Babies. Barbaric practices are done to women during Labour and to Babies in the first minutes after birth in the name of modern medicine and scientific advancement. This is the time when bonding needs to be taking place between Mother and Child and Father. I believe we are taking women's power away when we do this. True Empowerment of Women comes when we Honour the strength of our Bodies and give Birth in a loving supportive environment. Learning to Listen to our Heart and our Body , Trust our instincts and Nurse our Babies. We take back our power when we realise we can breast feed our Babies with our own Bodies without medical intervention or formula companies. This is a terrifying concept to many women and medical personnel who have been brainwashed into believing the lies about the dangers of natural Birth. The real danger is that Women would once again become Empowered to learn the Truth about Birth and Breastfeeding. This is very dangerous to the Pharmaceutical companies and Formula manufacturers whose bottom line profits depend on promoting hospital births where free formula is given out to new families " just in case". The wisdom is there if we search it out. We need to pass our knowledge of Birth and Breastfeeding onto this generation of Women before it is lost and our society " advances" to the state of science fiction warning stories where machines control the human birth process. Hold the Lantern, Light The Way, I am sending love and hugs from Washington State, USA, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR
@Laura South , Blessings on you Dear One. Hold the Lantern and Light the Way. I am so glad to find one with Eyes that See and Ears that Hear. I hope you have a lovely day. I am sending much love from Washington State, USA, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR
I have chronic pain and have gone through periods of such extreme pain I was screaming couldn't talk properly and still refused to call an ambulance (even though I'm supposed to according to my specialist). I really understand this woman in her circumstances I probably wouldn't have called the doctor until too late either. I have a thyroid problem I've left untreated for the past year because I couldn't bring myself to go back to the doctors. I've made an appointment now but I'm still extremely anxious about it.
@@violetskies14 , So sorry to hear you are struggling. Is there any way you can do a telemed phone call/ video chat with your doctor to get your thyroid checked out and get the care you need? Then the doctor could phone your prescription into the pharmacy and you could arrange pick up. Don't wait Dear One. Please set up a time to get this taken care of. Thyroid imbalances can cause Anxiety and Depression. It is frustrating to have medical issues go untreated. That can causes added stress and worry. I know how challenging it can be. I am hoping you can make an appointment and get the care that you need. I am thinking of you and sending love and hugs, Jeanne of In Loving Hands Counseling and ASMR
She was not obviously suffering from anything....duhh
Had my period with my 3rd child for almost 5 months - I went to the hospital because I had some pain, they thought cyst but when they did the ultrasound it was a cyst that ruptured and also a baby lol they said it wasn't the most common thing , I had no pregnancy symptoms except my then sister in-law swearing I was pregnant, I had false home tests that agreed with my period - but there was a baby also they found out not long after that that I had severe preeclampsia We managed to make it almost all the way through my pregnancy before induction at 2 weeks before his due date. Today he is a healthy 16 Year old boy 😊
I love your channel, your responses, and the information you provide. I do want to comment on the ovarian cysts and pain from that. I have PCOS and I have a history of ovarian cysts. I have also gone to the ER when I was extreme pain due to ovarian cysts and tried to tell the nurse that this is probably the issue I was having and was yelled at by the nurse and told that ovarian cysts aren't painful, don't cause the symptoms I was having (although I have had the same symptoms everytime), and stop trying to diagnose myself. Oh and to be quiet and stop being loud because of the pain, BTW the pain was equal to that of having kidney stone, which I have also had before. But. I WAS RIGHT I had an ovarian cyst and it was causing the excruciating pain I was in!
Now, the actual pain was caused from the cyst rupturing not from just having one. While the cyst is just there and growing it shouldn't cause extreme pain, maybe some pain or cramping in your ovaries from swelling like you said.
But, when the cysts rupture is when they cause you to be in extreme pain, like I said the pain felt the same level as when I've had kidney stones. The pain has made me throw up, collapse on the ground, and not be able to walk or barely able to move at it's strongest.
But, unlike the pain the woman in this video was feeling, the pain caused by a cyst rupturing should only last a few hours, because it goes away after it ruptures. So when her pain lasted more than one day, really once it last more that a few hours, especially this painful she should have sought medical attention immediately.
Unfortunately, a lot of women just associate the pain of the cyst rupturing with the idea of having a cyst because everytime they had a cyst they had the pain because it is very hard to find them in advanced, unless your having pain from swelling and have test run before it ruptures. A lot of women I have talked to also don't know that the actual pain was the rupturing of the cyst and not just having a cyst because when they do have one that ruptures the doctor usually just says your pain was caused by an ovarian cyst but, you don't need to worry it has ruptured now so it will basically go away now and the pain will stop.
They don't say that the actual cause of the pain was the cyst rupturing, or explain that it shouldn't hurt like that badly if it's just there. At least most of the time in my experience and what I have heard from other women this us the case. So this is probably why she assumed she could be in pain caused by the cyst for so long. She probably thought it didn't go away until it ruptured or passed.
Plus, since it's hard to predict if you will get a cyst again, rare to find out you have a one in advance, and there isn't a lot that can be done for them most doctors don't educate women who get ovarian cysts very well about them. Other then giving very basic information aboit what a cysts is, that it may or may not occur again, freaking you out by telling you it might make you infertile, and that birth control is the only thing that might prevent them. Most doctors don't explain much further than that.
I have talked to mamy medical professionals about my history with ovarian cysts and the truth is only the ones who specialize fields or topics related to ovarian cysts, like obgyns, actually know much about them. And the ones who don't specialize in somethong related just don't know enough about ovarian cysts to even be able to educate their patients.
My history with them is extensive so I was forced to learn more then the norm and I won't keep talking about me.
I am not saying you lack knowledge about them or don't educate your patients or staff. I'm just saying because of the lack of information provided to most women. I can understand why for her and with many women all they know is that have one or multiple in the past, when they had an ovarian cyst in the past it caused them EXTREME pain, so they associate any similar pain with having one again, and think no one can do anything for them except give them pain meds or birth control. And since it normally only last a few hours or so being this painful they might have numerous reason they decide not to seek medical attention and decide to they can get through it on their own.
So YES, a regular or not super large Ovarian Cyst can cause excruciating pain, but Most likely the time only it would cauae pain like this is when it is rupturing (i don't want to say 100% of the time b/c I am sure there is someone who had different a experience or extenuating set of circumstances). But, if anyone is having extreme pain like this woman for multiple days or longer then 3- 5 hours max, especially if the intensity of the pain doesn't lessen significantly, regardless of what they might think is going on, they NEED TO SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION! At the very least just to be safe,
Sorry so long I really do love your channel, just as someone who has been told I was wrong about a cyst being able to cause me so much pain, when it was the cyst causing my pain, I felt I needed to add that it is possible for ovarian cysts to cause this type of pain, it just shouldn't last a long as she had the pain for. Which was definitely a sign something else was happening like you said!
THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU AND TRULY CARING ABOUT TAKING CARE OF AND EDUCATING EVERYONE PROPERLY!
I almost fell out of my chair when she said she just had the baby and waited 2 days to show her husband first!! 😱😱
Same.
“I just don’t understand”... Me either, girl. Me either. 😳😳😳
I couldn't even come close to imagine what that must be like. I'm a 33 yr old dude, and if I was having stomach problems and had no idea I was pregnant, than instead of being constipated I look down and I see a baby head!!!!! Mannnnn, the human body is cray cray.
Have to say, this has my favorite range of reactions by MDJ!
I'm a therapist and I work mostly with moms with postpartum mood disorders. It honestly sounds to me like she had a severe trauma response. I'd be curious to know if she ever had treatment for postpartum PTSD.
Sasha Lloyd thyroid causes mine
@@rachaelnelson8270 thyroid issues can cause a lot of symptoms of mood disorders.
Can we talk about how dramatic the music is while shes delivering though?
Is all that really necessary? Makes it seem like we are watching a horror movie or something 😂
Well imagine being in extreme pain and then finding out something huge and hairy is coming out of your genitals. The music is acurate lol
Lol it isn't really, but shows just like to amp up the drama.
Your telling me she didn’t live one?
Ok I am addicted to her now. I love that she throws in educational facts in too
I actually watched this years ago. The exact same episode and I was like wow