I remember Katt Williams telling women not to care about the haters. He said that" if you have 5 haters you need to get your numbers up to 15 by the Summer solstice ". I never forget that comedy sketch
This channel come right on time! I’ve just gotten engaged to a provider and I’m getting lots of pushback. None of my Aunts called to congratulate me, women at my church have became distant, my mom is trying me emotionally, my dusty dad doesn’t want to put a cent down towards the wedding, and my dusty feminine older brother is trying to change people’s opinions about me. On the other hand, I have a small handful of people that are excited for me. My other siblings and a tight circle of friends are having a blast planning the wedding with me. My fiancé is wining & dining me while teaching me to block out any emotional attacks from others. In the years we were dating, he taught me how to drive, helped me with my professional goals, and constantly treated me like a princess. I’m at an extremely happy place in my life & no dusty or bust bunny can take my joy away. I’ve said all that to encourage you ladies to NOT SETTLE. Don’t take disrespect from anyone. Dimming your light to please others only stunts your growth. Be sweet, kind, & courteous. Know that you’re the prize and be the amazing person you are. Thanks Chloe_!
Alison Ryce congratulations on your engagement. I’m happy for you and I don’t even know you. May I suggest that you turn it up on them grinding and send the message Winning!!’ Lol Congratulations lovey!!!!!
My grandfather and grandmother & my grandmothers sisters are mad at my leveling up. I wear my makeup beat and wear wigs and they be so mad at my makeup. My grandmother and her sisters are dust bunny pick meisha strong black Trinidadian women. They want me to stop wearing makeup cuz it intimidates them. I walked into sephora and one of mua’s thoughht i was the newest MUA who was recently hired there. I know for a fact that if a MUA confuses me for another professional mu artist then my makeup is beat. Im not tryna brag or nun but ik i look good and it upsets the pick mes in my family and my dusty grandfather try to tell me i look bad with makeup. I love them so much but they dont like leveled up ladies like myself lol Im sorry that ur going thru this. Based on ur situation and my situation im starting to realize that what chrissie, shera, chloe, & asha c says is true. When u level up the dusties and dust bunnies around u will be upset.. even if they’re in ur family
I don’t see how they can find a wrong by dating and marrying well. Only way I see them at odds with it is if your fiancé is not Black and/or they’re envious of his financial status so calling you a gold digger. Hope it’s BOTH!🤣🤣🤣🤣
I never realized how feminine I was and now till I watched this channel. To be 100% honest with you all, I've experienced jealousy from other women my whole life. It almost seems like many women hated me because I dont have to try too hard like them and I still get attention from men. It's a blessing and a curse because I've always wanted a lot of friends but I feel a lot of women are prematurely intimidated by me. I know this sounds very conceited I hate that I'm saying this but is the shoes I walk in. I've just learned to be me regardless and enjoy a very small circle.
I know exactly what you mean. I have learnt to keep my circle tight, women are intimidated by confident women, who want to better themselves and are go getters Then if you're attractive on top, than just have to vigilant and know who is really for you.
Girl this is me! So many jealous women all my life...smh! And ppl will try and make it seem like something is wrong with you! So I cut them off and stay far away from them, jealous ppl are dangerous! Edit: Oh and some men get jealous and intimidated too, cuz you have standards and they can't use you so beware ladies and always practice hypergamy💝
You don't sound conceited, at all. I read your testimony and it was my story as well. I've learned to keep my circles small. And pay attention, to the slick comments from other women..bcs they are serious, jealous and hateful and cut them off immediately. Be well and stay feminine🌹
@@Maxymiliaa that is so true, well said! It's hard because I'm a social person but its hard to be like that when you meet women and they see your aura and feel they cant match it. Its easy to make make male friends but I don't want to be that girl with many men friends lol 🤣
In my 20’s I learned that we are all affected by jealousy. I used to envy my friends for always having a man. My friends envied me for always having a great job. When you realize that you are only jealous of an illusion then you learn that you have nothing to be jealous of. Ride in your own lane and create your own path. Your life is not meant to look like anyone else’s. As long as you are working on the best possible life for YOU!
Eccentricka1 Have you seen the movie Butterfly Effect? That’s what I think of when I imagine someone else’s great life. What am I willing to give up in my life to get what they have? Or what pain do I want to add to receive what they have? We don’t know what they’ve experienced to acquire the life that they have. Let’s use me and my friends for example, I wanted a husband and kids like my friends. A man to protect and provide but I didn’t see what they went through at home. My friends wanted a high paying job but they didn’t see that I was always tired, constantly in my masculine energy and stressed due to traffic from the long commute. Do we really want their life or are we just unhappy with our own?
...And here's what no one told you ....... They are even more intimidated by your calm, quiet nature. So just be confident and rock it. Believe me, they are dying to know what's going on in your head....but of course, stay cool and calm and you always have the upper hand. I KNOW THIS .
EXACTLY! I'm so glad you pointed this out. I tell my nieces, jealous people are dangerous, stop trying to "figure them out" and get away from them! Even the Bible ask who can stand against jealousy? No one!
100% accurate! Jealous friends stop inviting you places, when you invite them places they will avoid you at all cost by making excuses but you see them making time for their basic friends lolol I'm leaving shady folks in 2019 Periodt.
@@LilithTheAquarian369 I'm cracking up!! Yes some of us ooze bad ass naturally and they can't stand it! I've made peace with it and I won't feel guilty anymore. If anyone gets in my way I will run right through them
KB Spartan I’ve been experiencing this with a fee new friends I met a few months ago. All of a sudden no more invites and excuses. It makes me feel did I do something but I swear I was so good to them. Maybe I think that way because I’m an overthinker. It makes me think are they jealous but I mean they are so beautiful too with big plans. It’s just confusing. They have also stopped watching my social media posts. I still watch theirs to hold the peace, but Clearly I will stop
@@arabianx0104 Aweee, it sucks I've been in this positon before, trust me these girls aren't your friends! Stop watching their Social Media and find new friends that are on your journey👸
I got a promotion at work and one of my closes coworkers came in the next morning and didn't even speak to me. I was in shock! I thought something was wrong with her so I went to talk to her and she gave me the biggest attitude. I was hurt because I actually thought we were getting close. When she got her promotion, I was SO HAPPY for her so I was taken back when she didn't have that same energy for me. To this day she's never congratulated me and needless to say we aren't as close anymore. If it wasn't for office politics I would have cut her off a long time ago, we still speak but I keep a healthy distance. It's crazy how people can flip on you so easily.
same thing happened to me and I brought her into the company! my boss at the time just told me it comes with the territory. fast forward, ended up having to let her go - he made me do it. friendship was dead in the water after that lmao. crucial life lesson.
I’m 20, in college, and have been in a committed relationship for the last year. When I decided to become hypergamous and got with my bf (who’s not a dusty) I did receive a lot of push back. It’s almost like people think I feel superior to them because I choose not to date dusties, be masculine, or anybody’s baby mama. Thank you for this video it puts a lot into perspective and younger women do watch you as well 😘
This is very true! I have experienced many types of jealousy in my life and I am in my 40's now. I am always trying to improve myself it took time for me to understand this. I realized that I am worthy once I realized it my life got better. God bless me with looks and a great personality and I am not changing to make anyone feel good about themselves. Those non descripts got left in the dust. Keep up the good work Chloe!💃🏽❤️
Onced I was looking at a woman. She was really beautiful and attractive. I was mesmerized. Then she came to me and ask if I have a problem (but in a polite way). No, I just thought you are really beautiful and couldn't look away. She was totally silent for a sec and told me thanks and it's so nice to hear something like that from a fellow woman being. That's why we should be happy for each other ✨
I'm sorry to say this.. I compliment women who dress well, or have put an effort to their appearance. I would not go out of my way to demean anyone but I don't say to someone that they are beautiful because that's due to genetics that people had no control over. Got great dress on you I'll compliment, put together and great sense of fashion I will compliment, not beauty. That's only my opinion
So I recently got my hair braided and tried a new color. My sister told me that my hair looks nice but people are going to think I'm a lesbian because of the color...strange right? Then earlier that day while I was on the phone with her I told her that I was at work and couldn't spend the day with her. She told me that I am lazy because I don't have kids and referred to me as "Little Nigga" and I had to corrwct her immediately. Turns out she had me on speaker with her friend in the car. Anytime I talk to her about anything thats going on in my life she tells me that atleast I dont have kids and I don't pay rent. She has 3 children by a Dusty and I'm starting to think that shes jealous that I've made better choices than her.
Honestly, I never realize how many wolves in sheep clothing flocked towards me until I had to sit back and realize how much I've had to change my circle of friends! As a woman that was raised by a feminine dark skin woman, I was raised to be feminine, it's who I am. I realize a few months ago most of these women did not have that privilege and can't understand what true genuine friendship and how women are supposed to act towards each other. The fact that I've had women attaching themselves to me but secretly competing with me on the low is so sad! The only person I'm competing with is who I was yesterday! Once I feel like you have some kind of hidden energy towards me, I will act accordingly in a feminine way. Acting like I don't see the ish and keep it freaking moving! You have the issue, not me, and if you don't have the balls to address it then I'm blind to the BS! I watch my mother deal with haters her whole life with class! Trust me I'm not bothered at all, I will not allow someone else insecurities within themselves stop me from becoming the woman I need to be! I will forever be grateful for my mother! As annoying and emotional she can be she taught me how to survive in this world with grace and class!
“The only person I’m competing with is who I was yesterday...” YOU BETTER SAY THAT GIRL! You definitely have your head on straight and I admire your standards and what you stand for. Keep doing it lady. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
I have found that the best way to overcome jealousy, envy, hurt, sorrow, depression is to focus on you! Do something, anything to improve you! Beit losing weight, building your finances, getting a hobby, getting out more, starting your own business, or just improving your knowledge of something that interest you!!.. Just whatever, do something good for yourself and as you start feeling better about yourself all that stuff will disappear.. We all have the power to improve ourselves in some form.. There is no need to hate on or be jealous of others.. Take a step and watch how doors open.. Then people will be jealous of you!! Stay blessed ladies!
I’ve always wondered why my “friends” would always watch my IG stories but go ghost once I upload a bomb pic. Yet I’ll see them commenting, hyping up another woman’s pic 😴 & I would be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt me the way women treat me when they’re intimidated by the way I carry myself, but like Chloe said: Keep flourishing ✨
THIS. I take note of people who never or barely like my selfies. There's certain thinner girls too who never like my full body pics when I be liking like all of theirs. (I'm more curvy) but little do they know I wanna be slim lol
J Love always!!! Same thing happens to me! Hundreds of views on the stories but those same people will kill themselves to ensure they don’t like any photos😂😂😂😂
I peep game too like my own friends and family don't like my pics or comment on my pics but i comment and like their pics but they like and comment on other ppl pics but then in person they all in my face saying you looking good and sometimes i be catching them turning up their noses or rolling their eyes.
Women would literally hate me for no reason at all. They would call me Miss Prissy. They would mock the way that I walked talked and so much more. I have been told that I think I'm all that. Although I think I am pretty humble compared to most.
@@b.alexisbeauty5013 Please do if you can, we need to hear more women speak up about this as I initially thought I was suffering alone till I came across these videos
Wow an old frenemy from school used to call me Miss Priss! It's amazing how when we look after ourselves and look smart it triggers some people into jealousy and they try to put us down.
I recently became a single mom but never let that define me. I look good when I’m out w my child and by myself. I have started my journey of hypergamy and many of the people I considered friends are being hateful and jealous bc I receive attention from well to do men. They loved me when I had low self esteem and dealing with dusties but now that I leveled up they hate me because I made the decision to better me and my child’s life. Misery loves company.
I became a single mother at 20 and I separated myself from the crowd and the bitter baby mommas clique. Now I'm 26 with a provider man. I stayed with 1 child meanwhile the other women I was surrounded by have 3+ kids and are still single mother with multiple baby daddies. I was able to get an associates degree during my time alone. I became the sole provider and stable. I had my own apartment and car by the time I met my provider boyfriend. I spent many years alone, studying, providing, working. Disciplining myself. It's now paying off.
True I m a natural and healthy cheerleader! But barely get the same treatment the better I improve myself the more silenced they are .. not to mention I’m ready and always happy to share my new finds. Jealous people are real
I can attest to this. And it’s wack. Even if I’m in a moment when I find it difficult, I try. Hype up someone’s page. Share their work. Take away that pride because we all have a lane.
Jealously is just love and hate at the same time. They’ll love you so much but their feelings are displaced, causing them to hate you at the same time. Then it turns into “you think you’re better than everyone”. No, YOU! think I’m better than everyone. I’ve always been a very humble individual. It’s easy for me to pinpoint jealousy. 🚫
Yep. I had a friend say “you think you’re all that” in front of her family and dusty baby daddy. I ghosted the friendships that night after I took her home..her man didn’t have a car but had the nerve to talk ish to me smh
B.B. yup ! I’ve had to cut ties with a few “friends” cold turkey as well. When people are in competition with you, jealous of you, or envious of you, there’s literally no point in salvaging the friendship 🤷🏾♀️
EXACTLY, i get told that all the time. And i just i say in my head, obviously its you who thinks I'm better than you because i never came out of my mouth and said that or even thought it.
This is so true. I recently had a "best" friend. Come to find out she was envious and jealous. I caught her lying. Now I had to put up the ✌🏾. She is not who I thought she was.
This is what l have been thinking lately.Its so disheartening to find out that I was expecting envy, jealousy and sabotage to come from a distant person that lm not affiliated with yet it came from those closest to me.So callled friends and family like my aunt.Now l can’t even tell anybody when something good happens in my life.Coz l know now that what they don’t know they won’t destroy.
Being feminine just feels so much better..it just makes everything flow...not gonna trade someone's dusty opinion and hate for my energy ever again. 💃💃💃❤❤❤
I’ve gotten a lot of push back on eating better and getting my nails done and wearing makeup everyday....mostly from other women. Who like to say “ girl you look better natural! You don’t need all that” and I know it comes from a bitter place
I've always had women jealous of me. Jealousy is very sickening. Throwing shade, nice nasty comments, passive aggressive comments, threats, side eyes, not speaking when spoken to, bumping into you on purpose to spark a negative response, indirect comments, trying to pick you apart, making up lies, trying to start something. It's very sad and pathetic!!!!! I carry myself with class, not loud and I stay to myself . HATE at it's finest!!!!
I’ve encountered this at work ..some of them not all are able to speak with others politely but when I message them about someone calling they try to start an argument ..all the time. I’m only doing my job…one client got so frustrated that she threatened to commit suicide because one person was busy editing my messages instead of speaking to the client. I’m the only other black woman in the office and I feel like they are trying to force me out…by forcing me to work with someone who has displayed his prejudice toward me openly.
How to spot jealousy? They never like nothing or comment when you do something good but as soon as you do something bad they will speak on it in less than seconds. Protect yourself from people like this, learn to develop thick skin, and learn to control your emotions. Do not let other people opinions and insecurities change who you are sis.💞💞💅Reminder to myself first.
Omggggg! I always praise Jesus and very modest on my ig and a couple days ago I posted a pic with fitted clothes. My bottom looked really nice. And I notice how people reacted by their Instagram stories saying I’m putting a fake image or I’m a wolf in sheep’s clothing. All of this non sense
A lot of haters will be family members too..I went on vacation with my girl cousin and she had the nerve to get mad at me for wanting to look good. I wanted to look nice for dinner and she was like y you gotta do all that..I paid her no attention and went back to getting cute for dinner. 💁🏽♀️
This exactly!!! I’m a recent employee at my job and literally just had a coworker mention she didn’t like me and because of that, she pays close attention to everything I do. I’ve done nothing to her and other than a simple hello and goodbye have nothing to say to her. Her statements are a clear sign of insecurity and I just figured that means I’m doing a good job and I am that chick! 😉
Jealousy is a destructive emotion. I admire people, which inspires me to look better and do better. Women ruin other women's lives in the name of jealousy.
I’m literally in tears. I hear what you are saying loud and clear, but going through this right now an boy it hurts because it’s coming from the people closest to me.
Thank you, Chloe. I had to cut a lot of people off because of jealousy. My husband is a provider and the women that live around me and my family members are jealous because I don't work and he is younger than me. Not one of them is happy for me. It is a shame.
Siiisssssssss... People be picking apart my appearance these days. It seems people assume we as black women can't just look good and be confident🙌 I recently fully transitioned from relaxed to natural hair and it seems everyone has something to say and I'm just there binge watching your videos, growing and ignoring their sad negative selves💆
Same here my own mom, brother, cousins and aunt said i shoudn't go natural and my aunt is natural herself sad it be your own family and my cousins want even braid my hair even when i tried to pay them the hate is real.
@@samiawilliams151 where I'm from 4C natural hair is considered ugly hair especially if it's short. And yes, I just happen to be a 4C natural and people always ask me why I cut of all my "pretty hair" I find it pretty offensive tbh
@@shuntiamcmillan1503 me too.. I've haf relaxed hair all my life cause of my mum. Only went natural after starting college and they discouraged me so much but I did it anyway
@@doelala6679 Yaass i will continue with my transitioning hair until i can't manage it anymore then i will do my small chop or big chop its all about loving yourself and your curls.
It sounds so childish but I had “friends” who didn’t tell me happy birthday or like my posts but found time to update their feeds. Didn’t make time to see me before I relocated..I’ve pulled my energy back from them so that I can be open to people that are aligned with the higher version of myself 🤷🏾♀️💅🏾
This is true. Its crazy how people are afraid to talk about the term jealousy. It's okay to talk about the word, we as humans just have to learn how to use it to level up. Also, isn't it funny when you are doing well, how much people ignore you on social media. But when you express your fears, mistakes etc...everyone is interesting in your wellness?! Its so important to have discernment of haters!
Yup and the irony is confronting your envy helps you get out of it. All you have to do is some self reflection on why are you feeling envious of? What do you think your missing? And the answers you find when you do that can actually turn into some amazing discoveries!
Absolutely ladies. Some people are too lazy to do the work to get through the jealousy. I now believe that being emotionally lazy kills people faster than anything.
I agree. I’m gonna eventually talk about it on my channel, but we are afraid to admit normal human behaviour. Because it’s so ugly. God doesn’t expect us to to be perfect. But to learn and grow.
This is so true. There are studies about how men and women approach jealousy. Women tend to internalize it while men use it as motivation to better themselves. I think the reason that women deal with it differently is because of the scarcity mindset that there’s not enough men and that their biological clocks are ticking. Thank you @Chloe_. I love your videos and content. You provide such awesome insight.
I think it can be that men are more action oriented and not as codependent emotionally as well. Women like to be validated in their actions first and I think men can commit to actions much sooner because it does not depend on approval of others...based off how we are socialized in society.
OMG. I have dealt with jealousy from women my entire life. Even women that are way older than me and family members. I have never had a lot female friends and most that I have came across come and go because they always have horrible intentions. I have even had to deal with a "cousin Faye" for those of you that have seen soul food. My aunt would always latch on to whatever guy I was dating for some reason. She would make it seem innocent at first. She would literally ask my now ex husband for money. She attempted to destroy my marriage. She has successfully alienated me from the rest of the family even my estranged father whom I was just getting to know. She has painted this picture of me to them and they haven't even gotten a chance to know me for themselves. Other family members would try to make me feel guilty for cutting her off because we were supposedly so close. I have finally decided to focus on my kids and level up and let all of the chaos go.
When I tend to get jealous of others for achieving things i’m working towards, that is usually motivation enough for me to go hard towards my goals. I hate that feeling of jealousy as i’d rather be happy at others accomplishments so I always tell myself if they can do it, than so can you!
I told my coworker if she wanted a man she has to take better care of herself and stop dressing like a little boy. She doesn't seem to care about her looks. Throws her hair in a raggedy ponytail everyday... I told her to switch her hair up, do something different. Love your videos Chloe! ♥️
When you said jealousy of others bothers us because we don’t feel worthy is so true. I used to get upset because I’d see people who were jealous of me and I would be annoyed because I haven’t even reached my full potential yet. Now I understand I was winning in ways I didn’t fantom yet. Thanks Chloe_
I can clearly see this epidemic jealousy and insecurity for what they really are. I’ve seen it especially in the workplace where a lot of gossiping and mild bullying take place. When it comes to grooming I’ve rejected certain unfeminine styles I know would make me look ugly. I often wear makeup, hair extensions and designer fragrances. In family there’s no issues for investing in our looks. My sister and I support each other in external grooming. The problem is with some people we know who suggest ‘why can’t you go out without make up? I’d like to see you with your own natural hair! Why don’t you cut your hair really short or wear a simple head scarf?’ I can see where this is going. They’re indirectly trying to test us into looking our worse. Since we’re of African origin they believe we should look a certain shabby way to fit the negative status quo
I knew it! I had a friend who stayed asking me to over pluck my brows, cut my hair, wear baggy clothes and to 'just embrace my natural features' by not wearing makeup. Even heels were intimidating. I had to flee. The confidence kicks in when you defy their insecurities and watch them seethe as you walk by looking fabulous.
Exactly, as African women, when we wear extensions, then we are considered trying to look European. They rather have us in short hair, no makeup so that they have less competition.
Off topic : but my stepdad and mother are way too masculine so everything I do is a problem Bc I am so feminine and dainty and they are jealous of that. Then always saying why do I want a guy to take care of me etc if I need to do things myself smh. So my mom seems so miserable or jealous of me for little things and it makes me feel bad but at the same time that is her problem...I want and need better for myself and my son..
Lauryn Lavish that's really sad. Pray for your mother. And if you can, help her tap into her feminine side. Hopefully she will receive it and the both of you can have fun shopping doing feminine things together.
Chloe, you're absolutely right about using jealousy and envy for self improvement. I caught myself feeling jealous of a coworker, and I actually paused and asked myself why. I then realized that I didn't have enough self love and needed to invest in myself. It did wonders for my self esteem and I started to receive jealous and envious looks from others. I fell in love with your channel! ❤👸🏽
When I was on my weight loss journey I would buy food from whole foods and sprout and I was told by a bob the builder that I should spend money on those things. However, she was overweight with a lot of healthy issues, needless to say I am glad I stay on my own path.
Black Knight Fool Though you’re commentary may have minor merit. My statement was simply intended for light hearted amusement. You are taking it too far left. I really don’t care to gauge the scale as to which demographic holds the highest stake on a derisive emotion as jealousy.
I’ve dealt with jealousy almost my whole life from so called friends to family! When I’ve always wanted everyone to win and seen the beauty in others! My sister is dark skin and for a while I wanted to be dark but I loved my sister but found she would be very evil to me, had to cut her off! I wished we could have a beautiful sister relationship but tried to many times she only tries to use my good heart for her benefit and to try and tear me down! And I followed suit with the rest of my family that I knew secretly didn’t lik me maybe loved me but not like me enough to treat me how I deserve to treated! ❤️ thanks for this! Everyone can’t take ur light and that’s ok!!! I’m mastering this💯
I can relate to your story. I'm going through some issues with mom and other family members, it's really sad but I am finally focusing on me and my happiness while I'm on my new journey. Good luck to you!
Yes i learned the hard way that the ones that are right next to you are the ones that secretly hate you that's usally a family member or a so call friend.
And it's so sad that it seems like LADIES cannot support one another. You have to really be careful on who you have around you because envy is very dangerous
I’ve always thought jealously was a pointless emotion as it makes you totally irrational. No one is worth all that energy. What’s meant for you will be and it’ll be great for you
Turned out a woman I thought was a friend is a frenemy. When I started dating my now fiance she started being hateful. When he proposed she went through the roof.
How does one keep their level up in secret #1 dont tell people when you are going on a weight loss journey or dieting. #2 definitely don't tell people "I'm leveling up", dont tell people your goals like : mental health goals, educational goals, spiritual goals, financial goals, etc.. let them see you succeed in silence. Its more intriguing and alluring to see someone succeed this way than to broadcast for all. Let your actions speak . The Art of Level up is very sacred to each person and should ALWAYS be done without a word! Study past successful feminine women and 90% off them had a come up and wasn't always at their top and Marilyn Monroe is my favorite example. Many people dont know she had a hard past and got to the top in silence & alot of personal and physical development like her stuttering problem and physical appearance. 😘
Ive noticed it for the last 2 years. See, I was the big(ger) one, I was almost 200lbs and very insecure. I've lost 60lbs on my own. No creams. No fads. In the gym at 5am, ran a 5K marathon... my "friends" fell back so hard, I know they hurt something. You wanna talk about NO likes on a post? If its a picture, they'll like it bc they KNOW they have to they feel more obligated when they see others giving the hearts and likes... but these two girls, I've known since 17, they are both in the same h.s. hometown I went away to college they didn't. You wanna talk about not a single like on an opinion post, something I share, a positive meme, they don't hit that like button but they see. I hear spirit telling me, this is the year to leave them behind they don't deserve to be privy. Let them go and I am.
Chloe you taught me SO much this year. One of the greatest lesson was to learn how to find a solution to every problem. I feel limitless, i feel free, i feel more feminine that i have ever been. The world is ours. Thank you!
I have experienced this. My mother simply raised me to be a woman. Take care of myself, dont chase men, and even in jeans always be a woman. Unfortunately especially with black women I get a lot of backwards compliments. Just Tuesday my coworker called me fat. Granted I have a athletic shape as I work out 5 to 6 times a week, but no where near fat. I was just like oh that's your opinion. When other confronted her she tried to retract I just smiled. My opinion of myself is the only thing that matters. I spend my time and energy in making myself better not competing with other women. There should be a place for everyone, but sometimes others want your place. 🤷🏾♀️
I’ve always been feminine and thought very highly of myself. I’ve always been told “wow, you are so nice-so sweet” ...I’ve always celebrated family and “friends” in life...I was the cheerleader and psychiatrist and the fighter for my family and friends if needed. But I found this not to be reciprocated NEVER. I know I’m not perfect but being feminine and thinking highly of myself is very bothersome to others and I can’t manage to keep a friend. I have a plethora of people who “like” and “love” me and want to be around me but Im interested in deep and meaningful vibrations and I realize that people don’t know HOW to be friends. When I need a cheerleader, psychiatrist or a “fighter” no one has ever been there for me. It can be very lonely.
I would get attacked and pushback when bettering myself. I didn't know how to handle it at so I would dim my light and since your videos I've learned to ignore anything that's trying to sabotage my progress to greatness. Thank you for your videos they've helped me understand a lot when you want better for yourself.
I have that green-eyed monster Within Me. However, I use that energy to mark the areas in which I need fixing. I use Envy as a mirror. It's that simple.
Exactly. The frenemies always show themselves eventually. Your right, you do have to let them go and don't look back. Stay so busy doing you that you don't havevtime to be bothered with stupid.
I could use some advice. I met a woman and the energy was neutral between us. I somehow was caught off guard by our initial meeting that it was lukewarm and the rest of the time we spent around each other- I felt as awkward as ever as if I suddenly got knocked off balance trying to remember to be in my feminine and receive, (I totally didn’t receive when she offered to make a drink because she was hosting ughh and I declined because I’m so used to saying no I’m OK ugh and then what did I do?? I poured my own drink…) trying to gain her approval and trying maintain my own self esteem. Again, I completely was caught off guard emotionally and spiritually. Since then I went straight to therapy. And I am now on my feminine journey. Connecting with other women in acceptance that is somewhat based on our appearances and our personality and emotional intelligence -has always been hard for me. I am waiting for details on a brunch she’s having that she said she would personally tell me about via text. I have a gift for her too- and I want her to know that I am not lukewarm towards her actually I have never met a woman more warm, enthusiastic, funny and beautiful and I want her to know that I’m not forcing her to be my friend but I am respectful and I am kind. I don’t have a problem with her at all. I am in prayer too about this interaction. It’s just one of those things that heals you and teaches you. Should I text her and tell her that I feel she is a great person before we hang out? Will that clear a little of the air? I feel so misunderstood!
Excellent! 👏🏾 Excellent! 👏🏾Excellent! 👏🏾 No lies were told here. When people are jealous they will go out of their way to avoid acknowledging or to minimize another woman’s glow-up. Rather than cheer her on and congratulate her, they’ll ignore or block her because they feel convicted and by her happiness. It’s sad. But what you put out into the universe you will get back so be very careful of what you project.
YES! Absolutely experienced this throughout the year and had to “cut the fat” out of my life so I could continue to Level Up in peace! Thank you Chloe, this video is so timely!
It used to hurt SO BAD whenever I posted my accomplishments and my very friends were missing in the notifications. This video just gave me soooo much assurance ❤
Women really need to stop with these imaginary competitions that put each other in. That is why I have always judged friends and family by their actions when they think I am not watching. I have very few friends I am afraid of jealous people they are the ones most capable of killing you.
Thank you for this, you answered a thought I had, I have learnt to realize that there is nothing wrong with me. It's just that my presence intimidates women alot, including my own mother. She tries so hard to outdo me or talk over me or to control the narrative of my life and decisions as if I didn't make my own decisions and sacrifices to become the woman that I am today. I have come to accept that she is a dusty and we don't have the same character or outlook in life hence she tries so hard to bully me.
I have had people be jealous over me but I never knew why. Im cute, I'm nice to everyone but unlike them I don't have a man/never get the guy. I don't really see why someone would be jealous over me when I'm alone.
Jealous comes in all forms....even your own mother can be jealous....I was away for couple of years helped my mother and her children and dusty men....there all so ungrateful....she stole some money from me manipulated over the years....throw back my pain and hurt to my face and on top of that telling me if I feel like I’m someone because I have two pieces of clothes....the same person I use to buy clothes for and her daughter be telling me nah....that because I have two pieces of clothes I want to show off when I’m going on the road...what’s wrong with working hard spending money to look and feel good....all women deserve to be happy....when I couldn’t afford to look good they were my so called friends now straight up haters.
I was feeling envious about two weeks ago. I went home, had a good cry, didn’t act like a pick me, played hard to get and leveled up on my femininity. I assessed the other woman with whom I felt envious and wondered what I could do to better myself for my continued glow up. So that just motivated me more. And that man is still into me btw. With those frenemies, after listening to this, I noticed a friend of mine is acting like this. I can’t believe I never noticed! Both of these stories had nothing to do with each other😊🌸 except that I’m glowing.
I feel understood watching this. My mom is bipolar and these videos are so soothing to the little girl inside of me who’s healing and discovering her worth. Chloe, thank you! You’re a good role model for women who are pursuing hypergamy.
Watching Chlo_ is double the awesome. I watch the video and learn, I read the comments and learn. The comments under these videos are some of the most interesting discussions, I love it!
I have experienced so much jealousy in my life I didn't understand it but I am learning to accept it and move forward with my life. I see it much more clear and I am more comfortable with myself as a beautiful black woman that's on the come up. Chloe is right I had to realize I deserve everything that I have an work for.
Been there done that learned the hard way ! Got off social media, no one liked photos or would comment at my happiness. Own ex bf was the biggest hater! Leveling up different this time around !
Great video! This is very helpful. I do get a sense of jealously from other people. I use that has motivation. Haters are miserable. You have to keep yourself sane. And know that you're worthy of great things in life!
Thank you so much, Chloe, for educating and uplifting black women, this has been food to my soul. And I feel this is very necessary for a time such as this.
Wow thank you so much Chloe for this perspective. I have been experiencing the same pushback you speak of in this video the last few years I've been working in corporate America. When I first came on board it was definitely all women that I received the most backlash from and wasn't until I succumbed to diminishing my own shine that I noticed what the issue was. Now that I've decided to say forget the madness and own my glowup, I'm feeling the hate again. But I just go on each day with a big gigantic smile on my face while continuing to make upward strides. And that just intensifies the hate. lol Thanks for this! Now to meet Mr. Love me with Lavishness
![โรงเรียนห้ามรัก โดนจับได้ตาย...!! [เอิร์นไดเม่]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/4u02Sbr556Q/mqdefault.jpg)
![ตีสิบเดย์ [FULL] | เปิดใจ "อาจารย์ เบียร์ ฅนตื่นธรรม" นักสนทนาธรรมสายดุดัน!](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/vqaBI_mnoDk/mqdefault.jpg)
Ladies just remember that men are also jealous of you.
Mimi Girl, many don’t believe it but it’s so darn true! I once had a boyfriend that was very jealous of everything I had! Crazy 😧
Omg! Preach it! Some will be foaming at the mouth and shaking the jealous hatred is so hard!
They can be the worst. Especially if you are in a Shituationship with one. They will do EVERYTHING to bring you down
RatedR Girl l believe you 💯!!
The harsh reality
We won't kill 'em with kindness. We'll simply finish ' em with succes.
I LOVE 💖 your comment! Put that on a t-shirt 🙏🏽
I absolutely love this!!! Writing it down in my journal 😍😁😁👌👌👌👌
@@GetDazeDotCom13 Please do, sweetheart. Haha
@@naturallyleshe Great idea!
NINA WESTLAKE we’ll do both 🔥
I remember Katt Williams telling women not to care about the haters. He said that" if you have 5 haters you need to get your numbers up to 15 by the Summer solstice ". I never forget that comedy sketch
Amen Sister!!! 100%%%%
Ha! I was thinking about that sketch also! lol
🤣
He was correct
Lyndora Burroughs -Robinson 😂😂😂😂
This channel come right on time! I’ve just gotten engaged to a provider and I’m getting lots of pushback. None of my Aunts called to congratulate me, women at my church have became distant, my mom is trying me emotionally, my dusty dad doesn’t want to put a cent down towards the wedding, and my dusty feminine older brother is trying to change people’s opinions about me.
On the other hand, I have a small handful of people that are excited for me. My other siblings and a tight circle of friends are having a blast planning the wedding with me. My fiancé is wining & dining me while teaching me to block out any emotional attacks from others. In the years we were dating, he taught me how to drive, helped me with my professional goals, and constantly treated me like a princess. I’m at an extremely happy place in my life & no dusty or bust bunny can take my joy away.
I’ve said all that to encourage you ladies to NOT SETTLE. Don’t take disrespect from anyone. Dimming your light to please others only stunts your growth. Be sweet, kind, & courteous. Know that you’re the prize and be the amazing person you are. Thanks Chloe_!
Alison Ryce congratulations on your engagement. I’m happy for you and I don’t even know you. May I suggest that you turn it up on them grinding and send the message Winning!!’ Lol Congratulations lovey!!!!!
Exactly! Congrats on your engagement!!
My grandfather and grandmother & my grandmothers sisters are mad at my leveling up. I wear my makeup beat and wear wigs and they be so mad at my makeup. My grandmother and her sisters are dust bunny pick meisha strong black Trinidadian women. They want me to stop wearing makeup cuz it intimidates them. I walked into sephora and one of mua’s thoughht i was the newest MUA who was recently hired there. I know for a fact that if a MUA confuses me for another professional mu artist then my makeup is beat. Im not tryna brag or nun but ik i look good and it upsets the pick mes in my family and my dusty grandfather try to tell me i look bad with makeup. I love them so much but they dont like leveled up ladies like myself lol
Im sorry that ur going thru this. Based on ur situation and my situation im starting to realize that what chrissie, shera, chloe, & asha c says is true. When u level up the dusties and dust bunnies around u will be upset.. even if they’re in ur family
Well I’m happy for you 💕💕👏🏽👏🏽😊
I don’t see how they can find a wrong by dating and marrying well. Only way I see them at odds with it is if your fiancé is not Black and/or they’re envious of his financial status so calling you a gold digger. Hope it’s BOTH!🤣🤣🤣🤣
I never realized how feminine I was and now till I watched this channel. To be 100% honest with you all, I've experienced jealousy from other women my whole life. It almost seems like many women hated me because I dont have to try too hard like them and I still get attention from men. It's a blessing and a curse because I've always wanted a lot of friends but I feel a lot of women are prematurely intimidated by me. I know this sounds very conceited I hate that I'm saying this but is the shoes I walk in. I've just learned to be me regardless and enjoy a very small circle.
Some women can be very katty. Don't apologize for being you 😘
I know exactly what you mean. I have learnt to keep my circle tight, women are intimidated by confident women, who want to better themselves and are go getters
Then if you're attractive on top, than just have to vigilant and know who is really for you.
Girl this is me! So many jealous women all my life...smh! And ppl will try and make it seem like something is wrong with you! So I cut them off and stay far away from them, jealous ppl are dangerous!
Edit: Oh and some men get jealous and intimidated too, cuz you have standards and they can't use you so beware ladies and always practice hypergamy💝
You don't sound conceited, at all. I read your testimony and it was my story as well. I've learned to keep my circles small. And pay attention, to the slick comments from other women..bcs they are serious, jealous and hateful and cut them off immediately. Be well and stay feminine🌹
@@Maxymiliaa that is so true, well said! It's hard because I'm a social person but its hard to be like that when you meet women and they see your aura and feel they cant match it. Its easy to make make male friends but I don't want to be that girl with many men friends lol 🤣
In my 20’s I learned that we are all affected by jealousy. I used to envy my friends for always having a man. My friends envied me for always having a great job. When you realize that you are only jealous of an illusion then you learn that you have nothing to be jealous of. Ride in your own lane and create your own path. Your life is not meant to look like anyone else’s. As long as you are working on the best possible life for YOU!
Your life is not meant to be like anyone else’s . That’s deep
S williams The world would be boring if we all had the same story to tell!❤️
Exactly. It's a shame so many don't understand this.
Eccentricka1 Have you seen the movie Butterfly Effect? That’s what I think of when I imagine someone else’s great life. What am I willing to give up in my life to get what they have? Or what pain do I want to add to receive what they have? We don’t know what they’ve experienced to acquire the life that they have.
Let’s use me and my friends for example, I wanted a husband and kids like my friends. A man to protect and provide but I didn’t see what they went through at home. My friends wanted a high paying job but they didn’t see that I was always tired, constantly in my masculine energy and stressed due to traffic from the long commute. Do we really want their life or are we just unhappy with our own?
@@m.lynette6648 ..Yep, people only see other people's glory, but they don't know their story.
My dad used to tell me and my brother, "If people aren't jealous of you you're doing something wrong." Lol
I'm an introvert and became jealous of loud, extroverted women until I learned it's ok to be quiet and soft and be yourself.
Omg same...i wished I was loud like them. I still do sometimes.
momlifewithtelly Totally !
...And here's what no one told you ....... They are even more intimidated by your calm, quiet nature. So just be confident and rock it. Believe me, they are dying to know what's going on in your head....but of course, stay cool and calm and you always have the upper hand. I KNOW THIS .
I can relate 100%. I would rather blend in with the crowd instead of standing out.
Well im a total extrovert and sometimes i wish i could be chill but i dont know how... its like im just naturally like this...
So I watched the Malcom X movie last night and realized jealousy is what got him killed.
EXACTLY! I'm so glad you pointed this out. I tell my nieces, jealous people are dangerous, stop trying to "figure them out" and get away from them! Even the Bible ask who can stand against jealousy? No one!
raydoll20 2 I thought so too
Yup, the story of Cain and Abel
100% accurate! Jealous friends stop inviting you places, when you invite them places they will avoid you at all cost by making excuses but you see them making time for their basic friends lolol I'm leaving shady folks in 2019 Periodt.
@@LilithTheAquarian369 I'm cracking up!! Yes some of us ooze bad ass naturally and they can't stand it! I've made peace with it and I won't feel guilty anymore. If anyone gets in my way I will run right through them
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 That's exactly what happen to me the year 5 of my friends got married....
Omg yes
KB Spartan I’ve been experiencing this with a fee new friends I met a few months ago. All of a sudden no more invites and excuses. It makes me feel did I do something but I swear I was so good to them. Maybe I think that way because I’m an overthinker. It makes me think are they jealous but I mean they are so beautiful too with big plans. It’s just confusing. They have also stopped watching my social media posts. I still watch theirs to hold the peace, but Clearly I will stop
@@arabianx0104 Aweee, it sucks I've been in this positon before, trust me these girls aren't your friends! Stop watching their Social Media and find new friends that are on your journey👸
I got a promotion at work and one of my closes coworkers came in the next morning and didn't even speak to me. I was in shock! I thought something was wrong with her so I went to talk to her and she gave me the biggest attitude. I was hurt because I actually thought we were getting close. When she got her promotion, I was SO HAPPY for her so I was taken back when she didn't have that same energy for me. To this day she's never congratulated me and needless to say we aren't as close anymore. If it wasn't for office politics I would have cut her off a long time ago, we still speak but I keep a healthy distance. It's crazy how people can flip on you so easily.
Sounds so familiar to me p
same thing happened to me and I brought her into the company! my boss at the time just told me it comes with the territory. fast forward, ended up having to let her go - he made me do it. friendship was dead in the water after that lmao. crucial life lesson.
I’m 20, in college, and have been in a committed relationship for the last year. When I decided to become hypergamous and got with my bf (who’s not a dusty) I did receive a lot of push back. It’s almost like people think I feel superior to them because I choose not to date dusties, be masculine, or anybody’s baby mama. Thank you for this video it puts a lot into perspective and younger women do watch you as well 😘
Nasha B Thank you you as well 💕👑
Keep ur head up lil sis u r on the right track!
This is very true! I have experienced many types of jealousy in my life and I am in my 40's now. I am always trying to improve myself it took time for me to understand this. I realized that I am worthy once I realized it my life got better. God bless me with looks and a great personality and I am not changing to make anyone feel good about themselves. Those non descripts got left in the dust. Keep up the good work Chloe!💃🏽❤️
Omg sounds exactlyyyy like my situation ! Don’t worry you’re only going up from here!
Onced I was looking at a woman. She was really beautiful and attractive. I was mesmerized. Then she came to me and ask if I have a problem (but in a polite way). No, I just thought you are really beautiful and couldn't look away. She was totally silent for a sec and told me thanks and it's so nice to hear something like that from a fellow woman being.
That's why we should be happy for each other ✨
@Happy To Be Nappy yes 😂 it's so nice you can be happy for another woman. But so sad that everyone is on the competitive mode. ☠️
I'm sorry to say this.. I compliment women who dress well, or have put an effort to their appearance. I would not go out of my way to demean anyone but I don't say to someone that they are beautiful because that's due to genetics that people had no control over. Got great dress on you I'll compliment, put together and great sense of fashion I will compliment, not beauty. That's only my opinion
I don't like when ppl stare and dont at least smile or speak so I understand where she is coming from
@@sonyab2u974 yes! Staring without at least smiling or speaking signals to me that you have a problem with me.
So I recently got my hair braided and tried a new color. My sister told me that my hair looks nice but people are going to think I'm a lesbian because of the color...strange right? Then earlier that day while I was on the phone with her I told her that I was at work and couldn't spend the day with her. She told me that I am lazy because I don't have kids and referred to me as "Little Nigga" and I had to corrwct her immediately. Turns out she had me on speaker with her friend in the car. Anytime I talk to her about anything thats going on in my life she tells me that atleast I dont have kids and I don't pay rent. She has 3 children by a Dusty and I'm starting to think that shes jealous that I've made better choices than her.
You live different lifestyles, so maybe find someone to confide in who has a similar situation as you...
@@LadyCharity I agree
@@NC-bs1pw So true. Friends and family can react this way.
She is... My sister did something similar to me. Stay on your path 🙌🏽
My darling limit your interaction with her or stay kinda distant.
Honestly, I never realize how many wolves in sheep clothing flocked towards me until I had to sit back and realize how much I've had to change my circle of friends! As a woman that was raised by a feminine dark skin woman, I was raised to be feminine, it's who I am. I realize a few months ago most of these women did not have that privilege and can't understand what true genuine friendship and how women are supposed to act towards each other. The fact that I've had women attaching themselves to me but secretly competing with me on the low is so sad! The only person I'm competing with is who I was yesterday! Once I feel like you have some kind of hidden energy towards me, I will act accordingly in a feminine way. Acting like I don't see the ish and keep it freaking moving! You have the issue, not me, and if you don't have the balls to address it then I'm blind to the BS!
I watch my mother deal with haters her whole life with class! Trust me I'm not bothered at all, I will not allow someone else insecurities within themselves stop me from becoming the woman I need to be! I will forever be grateful for my mother! As annoying and emotional she can be she taught me how to survive in this world with grace and class!
“The only person I’m competing with is who I was yesterday...” YOU BETTER SAY THAT GIRL! You definitely have your head on straight and I admire your standards and what you stand for. Keep doing it lady. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
Ten Ways To Wear It thank you so much for your well wishes!
What was that?..... A WORD!!
“You don’t get brownie points in heaven to walk around on 🌎 looking like you just don’t care” took me CLEAN OUT 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I have found that the best way to overcome jealousy, envy, hurt, sorrow, depression is to focus on you! Do something, anything to improve you! Beit losing weight, building your finances, getting a hobby, getting out more, starting your own business, or just improving your knowledge of something that interest you!!.. Just whatever, do something good for yourself and as you start feeling better about yourself all that stuff will disappear.. We all have the power to improve ourselves in some form.. There is no need to hate on or be jealous of others.. Take a step and watch how doors open.. Then people will be jealous of you!! Stay blessed ladies!
Facts!!!!!!
Beautifully said! 😊💖🙏🏽
I’ve always wondered why my “friends” would always watch my IG stories but go ghost once I upload a bomb pic. Yet I’ll see them commenting, hyping up another woman’s pic 😴
& I would be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt me the way women treat me when they’re intimidated by the way I carry myself, but like Chloe said:
Keep flourishing ✨
THIS. I take note of people who never or barely like my selfies. There's certain thinner girls too who never like my full body pics when I be liking like all of theirs. (I'm more curvy) but little do they know I wanna be slim lol
J Love always!!! Same thing happens to me! Hundreds of views on the stories but those same people will kill themselves to ensure they don’t like any photos😂😂😂😂
My ex friends and family members use to do that to me all the time.
I peep game too like my own friends and family don't like my pics or comment on my pics but i comment and like their pics but they like and comment on other ppl pics but then in person they all in my face saying you looking good and sometimes i be catching them turning up their noses or rolling their eyes.
@@CrockyDile15 Oh My Gosh!!! It's scary how accurate your words are 😱 You're not alone. The social media shade is real.
Women would literally hate me for no reason at all. They would call me Miss Prissy. They would mock the way that I walked talked and so much more. I have been told that I think I'm all that. Although I think I am pretty humble compared to most.
Yep, they want to be you.
My life story. I’m almost tempted to making a TH-cam video about this.
@@b.alexisbeauty5013 Please do if you can, we need to hear more women speak up about this as I initially thought I was suffering alone till I came across these videos
Wow an old frenemy from school used to call me Miss Priss! It's amazing how when we look after ourselves and look smart it triggers some people into jealousy and they try to put us down.
Don’t allow jealous people to pull you down. You are worthy of reaching your full potential.
I recently became a single mom but never let that define me. I look good when I’m out w my child and by myself. I have started my journey of hypergamy and many of the people I considered friends are being hateful and jealous bc I receive attention from well to do men. They loved me when I had low self esteem and dealing with dusties but now that I leveled up they hate me because I made the decision to better me and my child’s life. Misery loves company.
I became a single mother at 20 and I separated myself from the crowd and the bitter baby mommas clique. Now I'm 26 with a provider man. I stayed with 1 child meanwhile the other women I was surrounded by have 3+ kids and are still single mother with multiple baby daddies. I was able to get an associates degree during my time alone. I became the sole provider and stable. I had my own apartment and car by the time I met my provider boyfriend. I spent many years alone, studying, providing, working. Disciplining myself. It's now paying off.
I noticed as well , I’m always cheering for other girls I know , but they never are for me . They just watch my social
Media and don’t say much 🧐
Very true
I have deleted people from my social media because of that same thing.
True I m a natural and healthy cheerleader! But barely get the same treatment the better I improve myself the more silenced they are .. not to mention I’m ready and always happy to share my new finds. Jealous people are real
Same. I wish I could delete a lot of Instagram folk. I keep getting locked out and have to change password. Ugh
I can attest to this. And it’s wack. Even if I’m in a moment when I find it difficult, I try. Hype up someone’s page. Share their work. Take away that pride because we all have a lane.
Jealously is just love and hate at the same time. They’ll love you so much but their feelings are displaced, causing them to hate you at the same time. Then it turns into “you think you’re better than everyone”. No, YOU! think I’m better than everyone. I’ve always been a very humble individual. It’s easy for me to pinpoint jealousy. 🚫
Yep. I had a friend say “you think you’re all that” in front of her family and dusty baby daddy. I ghosted the friendships that night after I took her home..her man didn’t have a car but had the nerve to talk ish to me smh
B.B. yup ! I’ve had to cut ties with a few “friends” cold turkey as well. When people are in competition with you, jealous of you, or envious of you, there’s literally no point in salvaging the friendship 🤷🏾♀️
EXACTLY, i get told that all the time. And i just i say in my head, obviously its you who thinks I'm better than you because i never came out of my mouth and said that or even thought it.
Monica Joao exactly 😫
This is so true. I recently had a "best" friend. Come to find out she was envious and jealous. I caught her lying. Now I had to put up the ✌🏾. She is not who I thought she was.
Gardite Fougy been there, people close to you are usually the ones jealous of you. Was quick with that✌🏽too!
I unfortunately had the same thing happen with a relative. It really hurt to cut family out my life, but it had to happen so I could save myself.
This is what l have been thinking lately.Its so disheartening to find out that I was expecting envy, jealousy and sabotage to come from a distant person that lm not affiliated with yet it came from those closest to me.So callled friends and family like my aunt.Now l can’t even tell anybody when something good happens in my life.Coz l know now that what they don’t know they won’t destroy.
Just tell her ✌️
Been there several times with friends and family. Hence, the reason I move alone.
Being feminine just feels so much better..it just makes everything flow...not gonna trade someone's dusty opinion and hate for my energy ever again. 💃💃💃❤❤❤
I’ve gotten a lot of push back on eating better and getting my nails done and wearing makeup everyday....mostly from other women. Who like to say “ girl you look better natural! You don’t need all that” and I know it comes from a bitter place
I've always had women jealous of me. Jealousy is very sickening. Throwing shade, nice nasty comments, passive aggressive comments, threats, side eyes, not speaking when spoken to, bumping into you on purpose to spark a negative response, indirect comments, trying to pick you apart, making up lies, trying to start something. It's very sad and pathetic!!!!! I carry myself with class, not loud and I stay to myself . HATE at it's finest!!!!
I’ve encountered this at work ..some of them not all are able to speak with others politely but when I message them about someone calling they try to start an argument ..all the time. I’m only doing my job…one client got so frustrated that she threatened to commit suicide because one person was busy editing my messages instead of speaking to the client. I’m the only other black woman in the office and I feel like they are trying to force me out…by forcing me to work with someone who has displayed his prejudice toward me openly.
How to spot jealousy? They never like nothing or comment when you do something good but as soon as you do something bad they will speak on it in less than seconds. Protect yourself from people like this, learn to develop thick skin, and learn to control your emotions. Do not let other people opinions and insecurities change who you are sis.💞💞💅Reminder to myself first.
❤❤❤❤❤
Omggggg! I always praise Jesus and very modest on my ig and a couple days ago I posted a pic with fitted clothes. My bottom looked really nice. And I notice how people reacted by their Instagram stories saying I’m putting a fake image or I’m a wolf in sheep’s clothing. All of this non sense
They’re passive aggressive and try to set you up . Just observe and watch ..
I’ve started noticing passive aggressive smart and nasty remarks from former female friends. Thus why they’re former.
When women I know are shading me, I just smile in inside, knowing that they envy me. I pity them for feeling so worthless and exposing themselves.
A lot of haters will be family members too..I went on vacation with my girl cousin and she had the nerve to get mad at me for wanting to look good. I wanted to look nice for dinner and she was like y you gotta do all that..I paid her no attention and went back to getting cute for dinner. 💁🏽♀️
😂😂😂😂
Its like why do you care if I do all that?? The makeup is on MY face, not yours, The clothes are on MY body, not yours. Girl why do YOU care?
I swear!!!
Damn u can't even look good on vacation now?? Smh
My fingers moved sooo fast to click on this video, whew!!! I'm high key addicted to this channel 😊😁
This exactly!!! I’m a recent employee at my job and literally just had a coworker mention she didn’t like me and because of that, she pays close attention to everything I do. I’ve done nothing to her and other than a simple hello and goodbye have nothing to say to her. Her statements are a clear sign of insecurity and I just figured that means I’m doing a good job and I am that chick! 😉
Jealousy is a destructive emotion. I admire people, which inspires me to look better and do better. Women ruin other women's lives in the name of jealousy.
I’m literally in tears. I hear what you are saying loud and clear, but going through this right now an boy it hurts because it’s coming from the people closest to me.
Kayla Sunshine I send you strength and healing💛❤️
Thank you, Chloe. I had to cut a lot of people off because of jealousy. My husband is a provider and the women that live around me and my family members are jealous because I don't work and he is younger than me. Not one of them is happy for me. It is a shame.
Siiisssssssss... People be picking apart my appearance these days. It seems people assume we as black women can't just look good and be confident🙌 I recently fully transitioned from relaxed to natural hair and it seems everyone has something to say and I'm just there binge watching your videos, growing and ignoring their sad negative selves💆
What are they saying?
Same here my own mom, brother, cousins and aunt said i shoudn't go natural and my aunt is natural herself sad it be your own family and my cousins want even braid my hair even when i tried to pay them the hate is real.
@@samiawilliams151 where I'm from 4C natural hair is considered ugly hair especially if it's short. And yes, I just happen to be a 4C natural and people always ask me why I cut of all my "pretty hair"
I find it pretty offensive tbh
@@shuntiamcmillan1503 me too.. I've haf relaxed hair all my life cause of my mum. Only went natural after starting college and they discouraged me so much but I did it anyway
@@doelala6679 Yaass i will continue with my transitioning hair until i can't manage it anymore then i will do my small chop or big chop its all about loving yourself and your curls.
When I look good I feel 1000% fantastic!!!!!
It sounds so childish but I had “friends” who didn’t tell me happy birthday or like my posts but found time to update their feeds. Didn’t make time to see me before I relocated..I’ve pulled my energy back from them so that I can be open to people that are aligned with the higher version of myself 🤷🏾♀️💅🏾
Right! I prefer a phone call, gifts, or text but got absolutely nothing
@@b.b.3761 Life gets so much easier when you don't expect you from other people. Especially in this journey!
I can’t be around jealous friends. They are the worst.
This is true. Its crazy how people are afraid to talk about the term jealousy.
It's okay to talk about the word, we as humans just have to learn how to use it to level up.
Also, isn't it funny when you are doing well, how much people ignore you on social media. But when you express your fears, mistakes etc...everyone is interesting in your wellness?!
Its so important to have discernment of haters!
Yup and the irony is confronting your envy helps you get out of it. All you have to do is some self reflection on why are you feeling envious of? What do you think your missing? And the answers you find when you do that can actually turn into some amazing discoveries!
Absolutely ladies. Some people are too lazy to do the work to get through the jealousy. I now believe that being emotionally lazy kills people faster than anything.
I agree. I’m gonna eventually talk about it on my channel, but we are afraid to admit normal human behaviour. Because it’s so ugly. God doesn’t expect us to to be perfect. But to learn and grow.
@@raesweety yes it does
This is so true. There are studies about how men and women approach jealousy. Women tend to internalize it while men use it as motivation to better themselves. I think the reason that women deal with it differently is because of the scarcity mindset that there’s not enough men and that their biological clocks are ticking. Thank you @Chloe_. I love your videos and content. You provide such awesome insight.
I think it can be that men are more action oriented and not as codependent emotionally as well. Women like to be validated in their actions first and I think men can commit to actions much sooner because it does not depend on approval of others...based off how we are socialized in society.
well that means they're are a lot of feminine men out here lol
OMG. I have dealt with jealousy from women my entire life. Even women that are way older than me and family members. I have never had a lot female friends and most that I have came across come and go because they always have horrible intentions. I have even had to deal with a "cousin Faye" for those of you that have seen soul food. My aunt would always latch on to whatever guy I was dating for some reason. She would make it seem innocent at first. She would literally ask my now ex husband for money. She attempted to destroy my marriage. She has successfully alienated me from the rest of the family even my estranged father whom I was just getting to know. She has painted this picture of me to them and they haven't even gotten a chance to know me for themselves. Other family members would try to make me feel guilty for cutting her off because we were supposedly so close. I have finally decided to focus on my kids and level up and let all of the chaos go.
When I tend to get jealous of others for achieving things i’m working towards, that is usually motivation enough for me to go hard towards my goals. I hate that feeling of jealousy as i’d rather be happy at others accomplishments so I always tell myself if they can do it, than so can you!
💯
thats always the mindset that I've had thats why i don't understand most people i grew up, they're very backwards.
I told my coworker if she wanted a man she has to take better care of herself and stop dressing like a little boy. She doesn't seem to care about her looks. Throws her hair in a raggedy ponytail everyday... I told her to switch her hair up, do something different.
Love your videos Chloe! ♥️
@Marie Michaels its only because I care about her LOL.
Yeah we men like feminine women
Ponytails are cute though 🥺
@@kimoraloa8540 not when they're unbrushed sis and it looks like you rolled out of bed.
When you said jealousy of others bothers us because we don’t feel worthy is so true. I used to get upset because I’d see people who were jealous of me and I would be annoyed because I haven’t even reached my full potential yet. Now I understand I was winning in ways I didn’t fantom yet. Thanks Chloe_
I can clearly see this epidemic jealousy and insecurity for what they really are. I’ve seen it especially in the workplace where a lot of gossiping and mild bullying take place.
When it comes to grooming I’ve rejected certain unfeminine styles I know would make me look ugly. I often wear makeup, hair extensions and designer fragrances. In family there’s no issues for investing in our looks. My sister and I support each other in external grooming. The problem is with some people we know who suggest ‘why can’t you go out without make up? I’d like to see you with your own natural hair! Why don’t you cut your hair really short or wear a simple head scarf?’ I can see where this is going. They’re indirectly trying to test us into looking our worse. Since we’re of African origin they believe we should look a certain shabby way to fit the negative status quo
I knew it! I had a friend who stayed asking me to over pluck my brows, cut my hair, wear baggy clothes and to 'just embrace my natural features' by not wearing makeup. Even heels were intimidating. I had to flee. The confidence kicks in when you defy their insecurities and watch them seethe as you walk by looking fabulous.
Exactly, as African women, when we wear extensions, then we are considered trying to look European. They rather have us in short hair, no makeup so that they have less competition.
Stay cute and classy.thunder will fire them for wanting you to look raggedy.❤❤remain stunning all day,every day.
Off topic : but my stepdad and mother are way too masculine so everything I do is a problem Bc I am so feminine and dainty and they are jealous of that. Then always saying why do I want a guy to take care of me etc if I need to do things myself smh. So my mom seems so miserable or jealous of me for little things and it makes me feel bad but at the same time that is her problem...I want and need better for myself and my son..
Maybe you can share Chloe's channel or these videos with her
Lauryn Lavish that's really sad. Pray for your mother. And if you can, help her tap into her feminine side. Hopefully she will receive it and the both of you can have fun shopping doing feminine things together.
Omg same thing with me
She is angry because she missed out on the life you are about to embark on
Bri - yeah they really don’t and they both are mentally/emotionally abusive so I don’t take their “ dating “ advice either
Chloe, you're absolutely right about using jealousy and envy for self improvement. I caught myself feeling jealous of a coworker, and I actually paused and asked myself why. I then realized that I didn't have enough self love and needed to invest in myself. It did wonders for my self esteem and I started to receive jealous and envious looks from others. I fell in love with your channel! ❤👸🏽
When I was on my weight loss journey I would buy food from whole foods and sprout and I was told by a bob the builder that I should spend money on those things. However, she was overweight with a lot of healthy issues, needless to say I am glad I stay on my own path.
🌹Jealousy is a serious medical condition. Please seek help if you have this condition 😂.
Everybody will experience jealousy. Even you have been jealous at some point in your life. It’s what you do with it that matters.
I’m jealous I didn’t get in to give the 1st like😆...Will strive to click faster on the video next time! Great Video!
Black Knight Fool 🤡🚯
Black Knight Fool Though you’re commentary may have minor merit. My statement was simply intended for light hearted amusement. You are taking it too far left. I really don’t care to gauge the scale as to which demographic holds the highest stake on a derisive emotion as jealousy.
Black Knight Fool Sounds like a personal problem.
I’ve dealt with jealousy almost my whole life from so called friends to family! When I’ve always wanted everyone to win and seen the beauty in others! My sister is dark skin and for a while I wanted to be dark but I loved my sister but found she would be very evil to me, had to cut her off! I wished we could have a beautiful sister relationship but tried to many times she only tries to use my good heart for her benefit and to try and tear me down! And I followed suit with the rest of my family that I knew secretly didn’t lik me maybe loved me but not like me enough to treat me how I deserve to treated! ❤️ thanks for this! Everyone can’t take ur light and that’s ok!!! I’m mastering this💯
I can relate to your story. I'm going through some issues with mom and other family members, it's really sad but I am finally focusing on me and my happiness while I'm on my new journey. Good luck to you!
Yes i learned the hard way that the ones that are right next to you are the ones that secretly hate you that's usally a family member or a so call friend.
Melissa Horn thank you wishing u the same! We got this sis ❤️
And it's so sad that it seems like LADIES cannot support one another. You have to really be careful on who you have around you because envy is very dangerous
yup! say goodbye to all your insecure friends lmbo
Crazy I had to cut off jealous friends in my life, I know there was a reason they kept coming for me trying to out me down.
I’ve always thought jealously was a pointless emotion as it makes you totally irrational. No one is worth all that energy. What’s meant for you will be and it’ll be great for you
Turned out a woman I thought was a friend is a frenemy. When I started dating my now fiance she started being hateful. When he proposed she went through the roof.
How does one keep their level up in secret #1 dont tell people when you are going on a weight loss journey or dieting. #2 definitely don't tell people "I'm leveling up", dont tell people your goals like : mental health goals, educational goals, spiritual goals, financial goals, etc.. let them see you succeed in silence. Its more intriguing and alluring to see someone succeed this way than to broadcast for all. Let your actions speak . The Art of Level up is very sacred to each person and should ALWAYS be done without a word! Study past successful feminine women and 90% off them had a come up and wasn't always at their top and Marilyn Monroe is my favorite example. Many people dont know she had a hard past and got to the top in silence & alot of personal and physical development like her stuttering problem and physical appearance. 😘
I love this post!!
@@bossladymsp2885 I’m glad you liked it hun ❤️❤️🥰🥰
Ive noticed it for the last 2 years. See, I was the big(ger) one, I was almost 200lbs and very insecure. I've lost 60lbs on my own. No creams. No fads. In the gym at 5am, ran a 5K marathon... my "friends" fell back so hard, I know they hurt something. You wanna talk about NO likes on a post? If its a picture, they'll like it bc they KNOW they have to they feel more obligated when they see others giving the hearts and likes... but these two girls, I've known since 17, they are both in the same h.s. hometown I went away to college they didn't. You wanna talk about not a single like on an opinion post, something I share, a positive meme, they don't hit that like button but they see. I hear spirit telling me, this is the year to leave them behind they don't deserve to be privy. Let them go and I am.
Chloe you taught me SO much this year. One of the greatest lesson was to learn how to find a solution to every problem. I feel limitless, i feel free, i feel more feminine that i have ever been. The world is ours. Thank you!
You're welcome.
I have experienced this. My mother simply raised me to be a woman. Take care of myself, dont chase men, and even in jeans always be a woman. Unfortunately especially with black women I get a lot of backwards compliments. Just Tuesday my coworker called me fat. Granted I have a athletic shape as I work out 5 to 6 times a week, but no where near fat. I was just like oh that's your opinion. When other confronted her she tried to retract I just smiled. My opinion of myself is the only thing that matters. I spend my time and energy in making myself better not competing with other women. There should be a place for everyone, but sometimes others want your place. 🤷🏾♀️
I’ve always been feminine and thought very highly of myself. I’ve always been told “wow, you are so nice-so sweet” ...I’ve always celebrated family and “friends” in life...I was the cheerleader and psychiatrist and the fighter for my family and friends if needed. But I found this not to be reciprocated NEVER. I know I’m not perfect but being feminine and thinking highly of myself is very bothersome to others and I can’t manage to keep a friend. I have a plethora of people who “like” and “love” me and want to be around me but Im interested in deep and meaningful vibrations and I realize that people don’t know HOW to be friends. When I need a cheerleader, psychiatrist or a “fighter” no one has ever been there for me. It can be very lonely.
I would get attacked and pushback when bettering myself. I didn't know how to handle it at so I would dim my light and since your videos I've learned to ignore anything that's trying to sabotage my progress to greatness. Thank you for your videos they've helped me understand a lot when you want better for yourself.
I have that green-eyed monster Within Me. However, I use that energy to mark the areas in which I need fixing. I use Envy as a mirror. It's that simple.
Thank you again! I was struggling with the cold shoulders. It is okay to keep moving forward. The right people will be with you.
Exactly. The frenemies always show themselves eventually. Your right, you do have to let them go and don't look back. Stay so busy doing you that you don't havevtime to be bothered with stupid.
I could use some advice. I met a woman and the energy was neutral between us. I somehow was caught off guard by our initial meeting that it was lukewarm and the rest of the time we spent around each other- I felt as awkward as ever as if I suddenly got knocked off balance trying to remember to be in my feminine and receive, (I totally didn’t receive when she offered to make a drink because she was hosting ughh and I declined because I’m so used to saying no I’m OK ugh and then what did I do?? I poured my own drink…) trying to gain her approval and trying maintain my own self esteem. Again, I completely was caught off guard emotionally and spiritually. Since then I went straight to therapy. And I am now on my feminine journey. Connecting with other women in acceptance that is somewhat based on our appearances and our personality and emotional intelligence -has always been hard for me. I am waiting for details on a brunch she’s having that she said she would personally tell me about via text. I have a gift for her too- and I want her to know that I am not lukewarm towards her actually I have never met a woman more warm, enthusiastic, funny and beautiful and I want her to know that I’m not forcing her to be my friend but I am respectful and I am kind. I don’t have a problem with her at all. I am in prayer too about this interaction. It’s just one of those things that heals you and teaches you. Should I text her and tell her that I feel she is a great person before we hang out? Will that clear a little of the air? I feel so misunderstood!
It’s ashame people try to make u feel so bad about yourself when u gain a lot of confidence. I guess misery loves company. I love your channel Chole
A man should always be ashamed of not providing. Chloe you were born to inspire these videos hit me
pp who gives backhanded compliments. haters would hate. I am worthy. will never allow anyone to chop my tree.
Excellent! 👏🏾 Excellent! 👏🏾Excellent! 👏🏾 No lies were told here.
When people are jealous they will go out of their way to avoid acknowledging or to minimize another woman’s glow-up. Rather than cheer her on and congratulate her, they’ll ignore or block her because they feel convicted and by her happiness. It’s sad. But what you put out into the universe you will get back so be very careful of what you project.
YES! Absolutely experienced this throughout the year and had to “cut the fat” out of my life so I could continue to Level Up in peace! Thank you Chloe, this video is so timely!
We gotta find a name for the tribe on chloe's channel ladies lol
Maybe sunflowers? What do yall think?
How about Chloe's Roses or Chloe's Clovers or Chloe's Angels
@@tararobinson6023 I like chole roses 😊
@@tararobinson6023 Chloe's Common Sense Club
I like Chloe's Roses🌹
@@chall6738 I like that too
It used to hurt SO BAD whenever I posted my accomplishments and my very friends were missing in the notifications. This video just gave me soooo much assurance ❤
Lose weight and you will definitely find out who your real friends are.
Yup
Girll
Hahahah.. smh, true
I’m using jealousy to level myself up. Tired of being insecure, I just want to create my dream life now
People aren’t the period of your sentence 👏🏼wow girl
Women really need to stop with these imaginary competitions that put each other in. That is why I have always judged friends and family by their actions when they think I am not watching. I have very few friends I am afraid of jealous people they are the ones most capable of killing you.
I needed to hear this today..Thanks Chloe🌹
Thank you for this, you answered a thought I had, I have learnt to realize that there is nothing wrong with me. It's just that my presence intimidates women alot, including my own mother. She tries so hard to outdo me or talk over me or to control the narrative of my life and decisions as if I didn't make my own decisions and sacrifices to become the woman that I am today. I have come to accept that she is a dusty and we don't have the same character or outlook in life hence she tries so hard to bully me.
I have had people be jealous over me but I never knew why. Im cute, I'm nice to everyone but unlike them I don't have a man/never get the guy. I don't really see why someone would be jealous over me when I'm alone.
Story of my life!!!! Like, the exact same thing
It’s cause there jealous that someone could take their man. However, since they do vu du on them. Could we really and then do we really want them?
Salaam.
I thought by sharing w/ friends about hypergamy and femininity I was helping us all! Let's just say I should've thought TWICE!😃
NEEDED THIS WORD! 🙌🏾
Ugh, I love Chloe so much. 💓 Definitely the BEST channel on TH-cam.
I love you too.
Jealousy is not natural it's weak as hell
Thank you, Chloe, for this much needed message.
Jealous comes in all forms....even your own mother can be jealous....I was away for couple of years helped my mother and her children and dusty men....there all so ungrateful....she stole some money from me manipulated over the years....throw back my pain and hurt to my face and on top of that telling me if I feel like I’m someone because I have two pieces of clothes....the same person I use to buy clothes for and her daughter be telling me nah....that because I have two pieces of clothes I want to show off when I’m going on the road...what’s wrong with working hard spending money to look and feel good....all women deserve to be happy....when I couldn’t afford to look good they were my so called friends now straight up haters.
I was feeling envious about two weeks ago. I went home, had a good cry, didn’t act like a pick me, played hard to get and leveled up on my femininity. I assessed the other woman with whom I felt envious and wondered what I could do to better myself for my continued glow up. So that just motivated me more. And that man is still into me btw.
With those frenemies, after listening to this, I noticed a friend of mine is acting like this. I can’t believe I never noticed!
Both of these stories had nothing to do with each other😊🌸 except that I’m glowing.
I feel understood watching this. My mom is bipolar and these videos are so soothing to the little girl inside of me who’s healing and discovering her worth. Chloe, thank you! You’re a good role model for women who are pursuing hypergamy.
Watching Chlo_ is double the awesome. I watch the video and learn, I read the comments and learn. The comments under these videos are some of the most interesting discussions, I love it!
Love your channel. Also your humor in the way you explain things cracks me up :)
Thank you.
I have experienced so much jealousy in my life I didn't understand it but I am learning to accept it and move forward with my life. I see it much more clear and I am more comfortable with myself as a beautiful black woman that's on the come up. Chloe is right I had to realize I deserve everything that I have an work for.
Love these videos Chloe I’m 20 and I really appreciate your Channel. 💜
Been there done that learned the hard way ! Got off social media, no one liked photos or would comment at my happiness. Own ex bf was the biggest hater! Leveling up different this time around !
Great video! This is very helpful. I do get a sense of jealously from other people. I use that has motivation. Haters are miserable. You have to keep yourself sane. And know that you're worthy of great things in life!
I think Chloe's Angels is cute.
Yes,I like that.👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🔥❤💯👸🏽
YES CHLOE PLEASE MAKE A SHIRT CHLOES ANGELS!!
Yess!
Yes yes and yes. "They don't use jealousy to motivate themselves to do better." You rock
Thank you so much, Chloe, for educating and uplifting black women, this has been food to my soul. And I feel this is very necessary for a time such as this.
Wow thank you so much Chloe for this perspective. I have been experiencing the same pushback you speak of in this video the last few years I've been working in corporate America. When I first came on board it was definitely all women that I received the most backlash from and wasn't until I succumbed to diminishing my own shine that I noticed what the issue was. Now that I've decided to say forget the madness and own my glowup, I'm feeling the hate again. But I just go on each day with a big gigantic smile on my face while continuing to make upward strides. And that just intensifies the hate. lol Thanks for this! Now to meet Mr. Love me with Lavishness