Codependency - Narcissist True Colours
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ก.ค. 2023
- Saying “no” to a narcissist, setting boundaries, or disagreeing with them will trigger their fear of rejection through the “perception of rejection”. These are old unresolved wounds that will show their true colours quickly. Do you struggle with narcissism? Or have you been hurt by them? There is healing and… there is possibility.
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#narcissism #recovery #complextrauma #complextraumaawareness #addiction #timfletcher #fyp #recoverytok #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissist #healing #fy
Another trigger for a narcissist is when they realize that you know more than they do.
😂😂😂😂 That’s impossible! They know everything and you are always wrong, they will always point out how right they are and how wrong you are every chance they get.
Oh no they know everything what do you mean?😂😂😂
@@user-gf4tt4su9lI just said that same thing 😂😂🥰
"You think you know everything." You think you are smarter than everyone else." - my Mother
Or telling them { Your Incorrect
100% agree. A narc will destroy your heart and soul and then walk away like it’s just another day in the park.
and make it somehow your fault too...
@@zytpangpangtotally agree!!!
sounds like you're not getting the attention you perceive you're entitled to.
So narcissists r damaged n that's why they r that way. is this right, damaged fr childhood? Or r they morally bad
@annemarie65,
R u saying they make these immoral choices to hurt others on purpose like a criminal or are they messed up from their own childhood or from someone twisted messing them up or they r hiding something?
this is becuz they r messed up, isn't that right. It's what is right for them how they know to be n they came out this way from their childhood. Right?
..& in time, *EVERYTHING* becomes a trigger, except complements & praise.
True ...I could tell my dad I had a jam sandwich and it would trigger him
Absolutely
You know, that is true!
Imma narcissist I think fasho and compliments and praise really trigger me the most.
@@gtnepthat’s because it feels fake because you don’t trust they mean it or they you deserve it
Finally someone got this right.
Narcissism is all about pathological fear of rejection or being worse than someone else.
The anger is not always shown right away, they can be passive aggressive and get back at you later.
True
The covert sneaky deceptive ones are the worst, in my opinion
That's why I stopped dating. They can get back at you for: looking good, losing weight, getting a new job, getting a compliment, people liking you, and on and on!
@@jazzsoul1695Yes, anything that they deem as offensive as a way to control you and others. There is no shortage of it, unfortunately:(
Simply smile, have a good day or enjoy yourself and they find a reason to ruin it for the sake of it.
this is what I have noticed
A narcissistic person will kill your light within because they have darkness in there hearts
Just so you know what you call darkness is actually a demonic demon that possesses these people. These dark entities (demonic spirits) keep them controlled, enslaved and in bondage. The only way for them to free themselves is if they choose to cry out to God Almighty for help! Now that's a fact whether you care to believe this or NOT!
Oh my God you are so right!!!!!!! It happened to me
they will destroy you too if you try them as well. Trust me the best thing you can do is leave
Demonic RAGE - Demons have taken up residence in their body - the devil scours the earth seeking a person to devour - they are no longer human, they are here to destroy Gods light in good people 🙏🏽💗 Read the Best Instructions Before Leaving Earth = Bible + Revelations Jesus is returning soon ~ BE READY 🙏🏽💕
They are demonic... they have allowed themselves to be controlled by demons by opening themselves to all that is low and base and common...
Yup!! Once I figured him out, I played the long game.. stop feeding him physically & mentally, stopped doing ANYTHING for him. He was out in weeks. GONE!!
His response, when leaving, “you’ll never find another person like me”…
Me: “I pray not satan!”
😆
😝 😆 😂
😂😂😂😂
Good for U ❤
Same for me my dear
She's angry and destructive just now
My narcissist ex and I hit a rough patch a few months ago where he was under a lot of stress and he started to get mean and cruel towards me. I started distancing myself from him. He wasn't get enough attention from me, so he broke up with me and was even more mean towards me!! The revenge they seek is insane! He broke up with me a few days before a birthday trip we were going on. He refused to go on the trip with me (probably wanted me to call and plead). Didn't even call to wish me Happy Birthday. Nevertheless, I went on my trip alone and enjoyed myself the best I could. I quietly walked away from that chaotic relationship. He circled back a month later, I calmly listened to him blame me for the breakup, then I quietly walked away again. There was no apology or remorse on his part, no love, no care in his heart. I miss him but I know he was destroying me with the constant walking on eggshells, insults, silent treatments, and superiority complex. And I'm never looking back this time ever!!! This video was so extremely accurate and eye opening 🎉
Sorry about your experience and happy belated birthday 🎉I'm kinda messed up about this video. Part of this stuff applies . I don't want to sound Like I'm making excuses I just want a perspective. I've gotten very ugly and destructive when I found dishonesty in personal relationships. To me honesty all over anything. So I prioritise it highly cuz to me it's not right to set so eone up to be let down and more than anything you don't take away a person's ability to make informed decisions. Does that make me the narcissistic person? I believe that if I tell u and you chose to deal with it ive done what I'm obligated to do. Furthermore I expect the same in return. I mean there are other obligations but regardless of whatever happens, hurtful things we mightve done, I admit it immediately. According to her I did that because I like to hurt ppl feelings? In reality we both did she just hid it and I found out. So I'm a narcissistic because I know my value and when I made a mistake I admit it and partner doesn't admit cuz why she's not secure enough? It's not really making sense in my situation idt
Same
I just left a narcissist. He also never apologized, gaslighting emotional abuse, no accountability for their actions, it's always the other person that has an issue. I ended the relationship & then he acted like he didn't know what was going on, asked me was I ok? I blocked his number & social media, no contact. I never experienced a person who seemed such a nice person & everyone else ,always needing attention, thinks he's a wonderful but soon as you challenge them, watch out.
Delighted you did the right thing 👏
Once you see the cruelty, you know that’s them. It’s not you. Unbelievable.
I know someone close to me like this. And no one really knows how she is. They are very unsuspecting and will get a rude awakening.
Truth.😊
Narcissists here. No. It's you.
😂
I forgot to turn the bathroom fan off when I left my house for a few days...my sister who lives with me in my house literally said to me, "Oh, BTW, you left the fan on when you left. She seems to have a problem shutting off the fan if she was not the one who turned it on???
@@gloriabult2967 so you don't like to be told when you did something wrong? Or being called out for making a mistake?
Seems pretty narcissistic of you.
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......
🤣
When someone shows you who they are, believe them!
-Maya Angelou
The first time.
amen....
@@riasb Mos Def the 1st x!
Yes. I've added the corollary: And they will be that to you regardless of what kind of relationship you have.
I learned this the hard way, But man I am so grateful for the lesson.
Wisley put brother
He called me a narcissist so I looked it up to see if he was right… turns out he was projecting. He was so scary when he would rage. Never wanted to fix anything and never wanted to listen to how I was actually feeling. I couldn't feel safe around him
And they will take revenge, in the worst possible way. They will never forget, never forgive.
never forgive
NOTE: An abused person can get triggered by a narcissist too. Narcissists have of way of scapegoating you as the crazy one.
absolutely
Yes. I was talking to a loved one about how I'm focusing on my next path in life after such a hard year. They stated that everyone suffers disregarding my pain (lost a parent a few months prior). They then said I was a narcissist because I threw back what they threw on me. Not mature of me, but once I gave them a taste of their own medicine, I was the narcissist. I had to walk away.
Exactly 💯 💯
We're all human and can get angry n bothered sometimes but the difference is the inability for self reflection/blame.
This video made me remember the times he would flip out over the tiniest of things no one would care about but to him it made him look weak or whatever, the outburst for something so minor like his card declining and to blame me for it (when it was actually his fault) but the shame he felt and the outburst shocked me.
But then I would get triggered after putting up with countless digs and comments and accusations, talking down to me and never letting me speak, hidden behind a callus smile once I reacted.. that’s when they have the power. But thankfully it doesn’t work anymore, I have no emotion towards his attempts and no contact is going strong. That was just one of many times he reacted even physically to such minor things.. but blamed me for them.
Nothing triggers them more than facts that prove they're wrong
then they rebuke your fact with something bad that you did in the past. as if it was something even remotely relevant to anything you were originally talking about. i know this first hand.
@@ChickenMcThicckenyour not alone
And they will still try to prove you wrong! They'll call everyone they know, run your name through the mud UNTIL they get someone to agree with them and tell them what they want to hear.
@@ChickenMcThiccken Oh TRUE! It can be something from WAY back 30 years ago or longer. There is no code of ethics.
In other words, the truth.. they hate to be proven wrong 😊
You find out who someone is when you tell them no to something.
EXACTLY!!!
The keyword here is “act”, meaning it’s a facade. They can only act for so long
What they dont like....The TRUTH!!!
well you no what Jesus said, When the Truth on the Scene False
hood. Flee.
This is extremely true. They absolutely hate the truth
Its like kryptonite to them
The truth is like lava. They will die with the lie and they’ll die before admitting the truth
Sounds like the loony left not liking truth as they'll somehow be offended!
He speaks the truth. Narcissists are constant chaos.
he aint speaking no fucking truth. why are Narcissists in constant chaos. Because most of them are Holy and are not the Unholy Alliance. How are ppl supposed to be that get there Nation jacked by fucking thieves from another Goddam Land. But dont nobody wanna go to hell. The poor ppl can be Narcissists, Rapist, racist, thieves or none of that shit. Because their the first Nation that was Robbed.
They live for it!
he just described the human race , i dont know any one person that doesnt fit that description ,including him ,including him ,lol hes lashing out at a human trate everyone has ,some more than others ,it comes in different strenghts ,mild ,bad ,and ,damm!!!!
Exactly
@@PoorBoyPennyShownah, speak for yourself…
My ex got FURIOUS when i said i would just google something we were debating about, that would prove me correct. FURIOUS!
Oh goodness!! Same exact thing happened to me!
You having any success and then not acting narcissistic about it also triggers them. Your simply BEING and succeeding, without them, is so aggravating to them.
Remain NO contact NO communication and live your best healed and abundant life while being indifferent and unbothered by anything they do or say......IT KILLS THEM. Proud to be a NARC demon slayer😎. Empath warriors you got this 🙏🏽.
Haha well done Rhonda and thanks for the advice. I've been one year no contact narc free. The healing process is long but good. I;m learning new things about myself daily.
@@PSW-bz4vj I'm so happy for you and proud of you because it's a process that's not easy. I'm 5 yrs free from the ex and I cut off contact from a few covert family members and "friends" 😂 so I breathe different and prayer is everything🙏🏽. Sending you love and continued peace❤.
You’re both a couple of narcs 😂😂😂
@@jerryseinfeld6767 sit your fool a-- down and learn something😂.
@@jerryseinfeld6767I have a feeling they aren’t.
100% my experience. The scary thing is that even if you were not like this to begin with they will drag you down this rabbit hole with them. You go into survival mode and will say, act and do things not in your personality for survival.
Yes, I hope Tim will go over this topic and explain it for others to be made aware. To anyone else who DARES to still Foo around with a Narcissist after any fact (leaving, earning some of your power back, etc.) This can be taken very wrong.
I will give you an example: I was with a Narcissist for 13 years. On our 13th year anniversary--he worked late, came in did not acknowledge me at all, no hug, no kiss, no I love you, nothing. Then 2 days later, he had the day off (I worked) I bought us lunch, he took a nap and we had errands to run that day so when i went to wake him up from his nap, he was angry for no reason at all and completely flipped out on me and verbally attacked me. I took it that day when I had gotten to the point where I was talking back and standing up for myself. After the anniversary situation, I was still bummed out and did not want to fight because I was hurt. After he went off on me for around an hour and seemed a little ran out, I asked him to leave me alone. I had to ask him several times because he would not stop--he finally did after what felt like me begging him. 2 days later, he came back and started again--again, I did not have the energy to argue so I just asked him to leave me alone and respect my space. He did not do it, he busted in through the extended door of the room I was in and started berrading me about how there was "better out there" and just kept going on. I finally got pissed and started screaming to get TF out!! After me stating this again, several times while being very angry, he did. And 4 days after that i filed a restraining order against him. I had not spoken with him for 3 months--we talked 4 nights ago and during the entire 2 and half hour call he did nothing but talk down to me and call me the "N".
I feel hurt all over again and just don't want to ever give him the opportunity to call me that when he is refusing to see all of what he's done wrong. I've been pushing through.
It's tough when they only see others wrongs and their own which is what causes all the problems. I honestly just feel confused.
@@LavendLady I'm sorry. That sounds horrible.
In my case it was verbal that turned physical over time. When she realized she couldn't get her way being verbally abusive because I wouldn't react, have a bigger mouth, can be a lot more nasty verbally and am more intelligent that's when things escalated to violence.
I believe if she hadn't have left she would have tried to kill me in my sleep at some point. I really believe that as I saw the rage in her and knew how unstable she was/is.
It was very ugly as she left with my daughter. That's a whole other story. I got custody back, my daughter is 22 and has started her own family, doing well. So that worked out, not without a lot of unnecessary suffering.
Anyway, I would say if your out, however it happened, how er much it may hurt right now, stay out.
They don't change. They may change the approach but the underlying blackness is always there.
Good luck
Gods speed
I know what you mean I did things and acted in ways that were not me... Now I have to fight with health problems and I have to fight with major PTSD and reacting in ways that are not healthy and you find yourself instantly going into fight or flight.... With people that mean well, but they do not understand. When you finally get resolution enough that you are not going to have any contact with that person in any way, anymore.. the more & MORE EASY, it gets to heal from the damage that they did. What hurts the most is what I see and has done to my children ‼️ They ( boy ,girl,boy...my youngest died in 2019) adults but facing the reality of somebody that should have loved them ALWAYS unconditionally... Causes them such damage and you have to watch them and do the best you can to help them but they have to get to the same point that you did..UNFORTUNATELY 😞... Making progress though... Praise Jesus ‼️👍🕊️❤️
Before they can start healing themselves.
@@LavendLady One thing is for sure and that is love doesn't look like that, EVER. He doesn't love you even if he says he does. You have to stay away for your own safety AND mental health. Confusion is not healthy. It's a sign that you are attempting to deal with insanity. In a healthy life your path is clear and choices are not made difficult. When you become confused in a relationship it is a sign that it is not healthy and you should leave. To survive in this life you must have peace so you can make good choices. Chaos brings pain and confusion. Toxic. Sick. Stay away from him. You cannot help him with this. He has become dangerous. Save yourself. He is not your child or your responsibility as a wife. He must find his own path without destroying the peace of other people.
Yes I agree 😢
I was with my partner for 8 years. Everything said in this video describes her to perfection. It reduced me to a shell of my former self. I made the mistake of holding on thinking i could change her. I didnt know at the time, they cant be changed. She decided to end things and replace me over night with another man she is set to marry soon, its only been a few months, im amazed how heartless they can be too when you are no longer any use.
Once you experience being the victim of a narcissist you’ll see it very quickly in others than you would have before or situations where they have similar traits or possible to have the traits “later” we remember so hard because how much manipulation and bs we had to go through and think we can fix or teach them when they know all along smh. It’s sooo hard to be oblivious to them once you’ve been a victim of one
Narcissists will suck the life out of you - if you let them. Get away from them!
@Sidney So true. My suggestion is to learn how to deal with them because they are lurking around every corner. Easily done when you aren't living with them.
Yes, like a dementor
Yes, only if you "let" them!😊
Whenever you say no, or disagree with something, and when you're good at tuning out immature behavior 😮... lookout for the 🧨🧨🧨
I didn't know what a narcissist was, until I "knew" what a narcissist was😮😢. Then I finally learned how to deal with one and shut it all down! It's soooo incredibly crazy to see them clearly go from one extreme to another, all for attention. And to see a person go from adult to a tantrum acting adult! Smh😅
What if she is my mother 😞 I’ll probably have to take care of her because she is getting old
Boundaries are a huge trigger. That's a red flag there. If they get triggered by your boundaries, look out.
Yeah this… set a very simple boundary with a narcissist I worked with one day… I just said “thanks for your help but in future I’d prefer it if you asked me first as I get confused about where I am with my task load”.
For context, she would insert herself into other peoples’ schedules and do tasks for them without asking as means to win favours. One of those very annoying things that seem “nice”.
Anyway. Next day she came in with an entirely different hairstyle and, years later, I can still recall the chill that ran down my spine!
Yes 💯❗️
Narcissists don't do boundaries. That's an early sign of the disorder. They will impose theirs' on you, but you aren't allowed to have any. Looking back, on a 10 year relationship, before it came out I was likely dealing w/ one, I finally realized, he had wittled them all a way, slowly but surely.
Thank you ❤
@@willslingwoodErr, why? What's significant about a hairstyle change?
it's SO HARD to BELIEVE someone is that bad...
I stood up to a narcissist in my work place, which was completely unacceptable to her. Over the next few months, she put an incalculable amount of energy into making my life hell - it was clear she wanted me out. It worked. After I'd gone, she said to the other staff: 'I don't know WHY he left so suddenly', which was pure deflection, and gaslighting, as the remaining staff were all well aware of her toxicity. This guy is literally describing my experience.
Narcissists have a hard time keeping your name out of their mouth; they constantly like to bother or criticize ( label) you- especially if you ignore them, hence their dislike for rejection.
bingo. my dad this morning demanded i say "good morning". im like WTF? i walked out the house and bought a joint.
They hate when they perceive you doing better.
In my experience, that’s when they either tear you down or start to claim your successes as their own (e.g., if it hadn’t been you never would have achieved XYZ).
Yep, the jealousy! WOW my ex did not like seeing me come up AND I was his biggest cheerleader. 🤯 I'm glad I'm out of that mind F**k!
They don't if they feel you're below them no matter how better you are than them.
@@Pumpkin0_0 Not true. In fact, if that's how they're making you feel, it's done on purpose. Deep down they know.
@@nicolii7321 Then you don't know how real narcissists work. If they see you as lesser than them, they don't care what you do, they are perfect and you're not. It's part of the delusion of grandeur and the "main character" mentality. It especially kicks in when they need to compensate for what they don't have. Now, if you're out of their circle and you're better than them, you're an immediate threat to their grandeur and they will even pretend to bow down to you for their own benefit.
Thank you...for being you...and helping us.
You just described my ex-husband. An extremely cruel and demanding person. I'm so glad I'm away from him.
How did you marry hom?
probably because she knew him since childhood OR/AND he love bombed her. @@bundestagbundestag2551
If you dare insult them or speak the truth about them they will falsely incriminate and humiliate you so loud so the neighbours can hear.
Funny I was just thinking what if someone is gaslighting them or if they are right or the other person is also a narcissist... Seems like it could be dependent on the situation to me...
Sadly, true.
What I want to know is how do you approach a narcissist in a godly way? Some things I've seen is you walk away and pray. But I ask you, how does God save or can he ? It's seems paradoxical
@@erinwelk343
I had a pastor once say that you can't want more for someone than they want for themselves. I'm on my knees day and night for my narcissist. I had to truly give it to God and ask him to break those demonic chains. There are several times in the Bible that Jesus delivered someone from demons, I know it can happen. It takes a lot of prayer and patience. That's my personal thoughts. ♥️
@@julievalencia8633 I agree, I've seen people and even animals delivered. God is good. Even better than good he is great.
They'll say the most vile shit to anyone that they precieved to have attacked them first. Then they'll blame the victim for their behavior
Its never justified?
Not always depends who they say it to.some project and some tell the truth
💯🦎
my parents are like that
This. 💯
My 5 year old is a narcissist. HATES WHEN I TELL HIM NO... Throws a tantrum! 😅😅😅
lol that doesn’t mean he’s a Narc. 😂😂🖤🤞🏾🩵
@@godsway8501 he also gaslights me like all the time...
@@SSW939 he’s a child, he doesn’t know any better. As he grows older teach him Spiritually, Emotional Intelligence, read books that will influence him to be a greater version of himself as he grows older.
@@godsway8501 I actually got him a job at local sowing business down town...I had to pull a few strings. He's really small and nimble and has plenty of energy. He's working at a factory. He wont be able to gaslight not that he's going to be working 14 hours a day!
And NEVER bother to ask for honesty...
They'll call that "betrayal" and attack your character for simply calling them out on the lies.
When strangers come over and the narcissistic parent is able to instantaneously switch their personality as if nothing ever happened 😂😂😂
I find that SO triggering.
My mother did this. I remember her hitting me hard when I was in the back seat of her van and I was crying. We were outside the grocery store and suddenly the store owner opened the van door with our box of groceries. In the blink of an eye my mother smiled at me and said "you ok sweetie". So confusing for a child.
@@Jessica-zf2df I feel you sister! It's actually traumatizing because as a child it leaves you confused and breaks trust. As an adult you do your best to process it and still find it hard to understand whilst maintaining the relationship. You can forgive, however some things you sadly never forget.
Much love to you from Western Australia Jessica 🦘❤️🤙🏼
@@YaNeK92 I'm sorry you went through this too. I think it's actually gaslighting because as a child you doubt your reality. Like how come I'm frightened of my mother yet she's being so nice. The fact that she's only being 'nice' because there's a 'witness' doesn't occur to a child. Sending hugs to you from Wales UK 💕
And right in front of you, as if you don't know who they really are.
Lots of people get angry. I have found narcs don’t want resolution, they want control. Therefore, when they fight, it goes towards abuse: name calling, threats, etc. it’s because they don’t care about the other persons needs. They only care that they get what they want so they’ll bully and intimidate.
That's how every woman fights
Narcissists are obsessed with control and Narcisstic supply. JazzyT.
@Muzzy0085 Not every, but most. The feminist crap really got under the skin of present women. And it is nothing more than about making all the antisocial narcissistic women's behavior a virtue, called empowerment.
💯
@@lhood8263 exactly! The abuse and gaslighting on the Democratic side is textbook. It’s almost unbelievable.
Wow, yup this has happened so many times. This just actually happened a few weeks ago with a daughter and mom I was taking care of! I was a caretaker but ended up as a maid. The minute they found out I wanted to cut a few hours for personal reasons they got furious!!! I left, I deal with a lot already and can't handle ugly mean, abusers.
I'm a recovering narcissist literally the only cure to becoming a narcissist is to start looking at yourself objectively in the mirror and the only reason I started doing that was because I was really high one night and it had opened something up within me and got me thinking about how horrible the person I was to some people, how abusive I was and how I didn't want to be that person anymore.
You are not part of that category,you were just a victim of abuse,bad parenting,not being appreciated so you searched to obtain it,that's human nature to chase it no matter what . A narcissist will never reveal their identity because they have been programmed since birth like a demon😊
You are not a narcissist. They lack empathy and almost always have no insight about their behavior.
I was finally able to break a trauma bond with a woman I grew up with. I feel strong and light and happy for the first time in 30 years.
Know exactly what you mean.
Bless you ❤
Dude!!! You're not alone. Took me 32 years and I thought I was good at it. Haha
And when you see, believe them the first time and LEAVE, DON'T go back to them.
with these people. this isn't just a bad day. its every day LOL
Yep. Stand your ground against them. Know who you are.
This is true. Rejection is their kryptonite.
They push you away pull you back, they are sadistic cruelty when you can’t do something, yet won’t lift a finger for you.
@stylist62:
That is so true! Which type of narcissist were you with?
My husband will help when I ask him and he will help here and there but I'm so unhappy. He posed to be wonderful and so emotionally connected in the beginning now he doesn't know how to connect. I was to blind to see it bc of my child abuse.hes also a alcoholic and becomes a monster when he's drunk.
@@faithledbetter5664 slowly find ways to become self sufficient and plan your escape if need be. The only person you can help is yourself and other people signed up for their own Journeys and we cannot interrupt that as we focus on ourselves. You can't give to another what you do not have, just as your spouse never had what he appeared to have so it was disingenuous and inauthentic.
As you change and grow they can either come along for the ride and do the same or they have to fall away and we cannot get in the way of that. It also allows for better things to come in, wants to talk to people remove themselves and go on to continue their patterns with others. That means freedom for you❤
You must look within and create/find everything you ever wanted from the parent/spouse WITHIN. It's there. Reparenting ourselves in HEALTHY ways is how we heal. Can't do it in the same environment that we got sick in, though. So minimize time with VCN's (vulnerable covert narcs) and go no contact w/ family if possible. They need scapegoats/attentions supplies though and got comfy w/ you playing that part. Resign from that "job". Surviving Narcissism, Dr. Ramani, Women of Impact, Patrick Teaghan, Dr. Sam Vaknin, Lisa Romano, The Holistic Psychologist, Mental Healness...all good youtube sites. Mental Healness/Sam Vaknin is good to explain their side of what they're doing, but focus more on YOU. Get to know your body and put it in high vibrational situations often, passionate, fun, light, peaceful, blissful situations.. barefoot in nature especially. Baths, healthy foods, pure water, mediation, energy work, massage, laughing, doing what you loved a child etc. & be fully present as to how it FEELS good... to start reprogramming your cells for what they're designed to feel like. Any form of self care you can provide 4 yourself, creates self love/value/worth that we can't recognize cuz we got it programmed out of us by toxic adults (abused when THEY were kids). Generational trauma can be stopped by YOU loving YOU first and always in every moment. We can only attract same people/situations as our childhood, because it's "familiar" to our bodies, which have been traumatized, as bodies never lie. We just didnt know what high vibration and healthy love was cuz we never felt it, cuz parents cant teach it, cuz they never learned it. Your hubby never DID know how, he just copied what he saw others doing over his younger years, he's likely hypervigilant & also damaged from his childhood. Dysfunction attracts dysfunction because we were unconscious as to our unhealthy behaviors of our own. so we can't see theirs either. Blessing is, your body is waking you up!!
@@faithledbetter5664 You are a powerful spiritual being and family saw your light from Day ONE, which shone on the darkness /shame/guilt within THEM, from their childhood traumas. They attempt to squelch your light so you'll shine less. So they project on the nearest object - You. They abused their authority. Had nothing to do with you, just as what another person anywhere, spouse included, says/does/thinks has NOTHING to do with you We can only speak/view/judge others' or situations Exactly as we View Ourselves.. always. So they're revealing easily to you, who THey are, what Their fears are, etc. Clear out emotional triggers and observe/listen...they give themselves away every time. You can't heal the hubby , until you heal yourself, and even then he has to have strong desire to step out of comfort zone of destructive body habits and love himself first also. Then 2 WHOLE people can attract each other and complement without being codependent. I speak from experience...Meditation did it for me.. self master of thoughts, being in the moment, cleared out any fear/future obsessing/past regretting/anxiety/compulsion behaviors/people pleasing, etc. People pleasing comes from kids trying to please non-joyous miserable self hating parents. Can't be done..yet we are programmed to do it in adulthood..when we become Conscious of ourselves/words/actions/thoughts, thats how we change them. Man in the Mirror--great song..lol... The journey back to your True Self can be done. Energy flows where attention goes...place the energy on you, create things..move forward vs letting others keep you stuck...we're not here to be liked or fit in, (but we were forced to conform as a child to survive- but no more)...we're here to stand out & utilize our gifts. We're all energy beings- we control our vibrational frequency as powerful beings...- where is our energy focused? Are we choosing high or low vibrations? check in with the body each time....Raise your frequency, & attract same (better things/people, etc.) . Donna Eden, Louise Hay- good resources. Self discipline, with boundaries and self love show others how to treat us, or they don't get access to us. Close "friends", bosses, coworkers, etc may all have to fall away also, as we attracted the same vibration as our family, (unconsciously)because it was "comfortable" to be unhealthy. You're not alone. Look for the real helpers...as Mr. Rogers says. ;-)
Get out of this relationship if they’re not doing anything for you, you need to get out it’s not fair to yourself. You deserve better. It took me the last five years to convince myself to get out. If not, they can hurt you really bad or come close to killing you and you don’t want that to happen.
Telling a narcissist that they are a narcissist can be the biggest trigger.
I just did that today and now I’m
scerrred 😅
@@stephaniecallahan5356 Seriously! Even asking one if they opened your mail, when it's obvious they did, can set the whole forest on fire. Ouch.
I'll never forget calling by now ex-husband after taking our son for an eye exam and finding out he needed glasses.
My ex immediately went to wanting a second opinion because he couldn't understand how anything could be wrong with his son.
That's when I realized how dangerous narcissists are because they view their children as an appendage of their selves. 😢😔
Everyone acts out when they're triggered. We may act out differently and our triggers may be different, but again everyone acts out when triggered.
I'm a Narc and what he is saying is 100 percent correct. He is talking about me. At 52 years old I've learned to manage my emotions and behaviors better. I'm trying to be better and stop hurting people and basically myself also.
Contact Dr Doug Weis he has books on helping establish healthy emotions.
I've only recently come across the explanation of a narcissist. Only because our friendship group was totally destroyed by one. Well actually she managed to separate the rest of the friends from my family initially so that she could have more control of the other friends (my family was "in her way" so to speak). She had been EXTREMELY devious and managed to separate our friends from us for an entire year! They all chose her "friendship" and her family over ours. We were never visited by our friends for the entire year! We were hurt, but waited patiently.... then the 'wheels fell off!' They all began to see her for who she really is. It didn't take long before we had all our friends back and her family is now out of the picture entirely. Her husband is (was) a very close school friend of mine and I miss him dearly. I had two meetings with him afterwards but I just could begin to try and explain all that she had done, too difficult and he wouldn't have even comprehend or believed any of it anyways. I recall him saying to me "I just don't understand what has happened! Why has this gone so wrong?" And that's the reality - he has had the wool pulled over his eyes too. If anyone has suggestions as to how I can mend my friendship with please do.
Congrats on improving yourself. May you rise to betterment. I wish my husband would figure this out.
To be a narc and A) both realize and admit one needs help and then B) take responsibility by taking action towards repairing one’s issues is huge. Respect and best wishes to you!
@@lorrawoods6428 Thank you for the lead. I will
Very true. Get away from a narcissist! Only solution.
100% you will end up suffering its not worth it
Sounds loke Trump!😮
It's worse when that person is your dad.
@@marysmith-ps7ujthere’s always at least one person that brings up politics in a post that has nothing to do with them 🙄
One will 100% end up suffering when they cannot get away from themselves. We do not do away with the person, we enlighten ourselves and do away with the concept... Everyone is fallible
As a narcissist, this is 100% correct. If someone rejects my actions or something else, I will lash out or plan revenge.
This here - i check all the boxes! Im clearly a narcs nemesis 😂 and when you know how to handle one you’ll become their worst nightmare 😊
I totally agree! My mom has been with my narcissistic dad for 76 yrs. I say fight fire with fire. My mom was in the hospital for 3 weeks and now in rehab. She refused to see my so called dad. The light bulb finally went on with her having that time away from him. I found a secured place for her to stay when she gets out of rehab. I moved all her belongings the last 2 days. He is furious with me and called me an Ahole and rotten daughter. Too bad...so sad...so sorry! 😂
So for almost twenty years I learned to walk on egg shells afraid of the immediate backlash. More like terrified of the yelling, disgusting words and threats. I lived in constant fear. No more
Terrible way of living. I wish you sooo much healing and happiness
Ppl r calling all kinds of people narcissists who aren't. It's an easy excuse or go to, to shift blame and free person A of their stuff.
That being said, there r real narcissists..creating pain n damaged others. But the N narc word seems like it's a trend now, ppl use it as a go to for every relationship failure. BTW, it's always the other person whose the narc.(new n word)
@@BetterTogether300I agree.. I feel people are making more of this than thru should be..
I'm yelling right now and calling some ppl names but I feel it's warranted. Sometimes it is. When there's a spiritual fight behind the scenes, spiritual warfare, pressure, can create narcissists out of normal ppl.
Feels GOOD doesn’t it to BE FREE???? YES!!! God bless you and congratulations on your freedom! I found freedom myself recently and it FEELS GRRRRRRREATTT
A person whose been treated poorly or abused can act this way too.
Thanks. That's exactly what I posted. Hypersensitive persons, undiagnosed, mistreated and/or abused tend to have the same reactions. "Better hurt the other one so they stop hurting you"
The point of the vid is that they do this at the smallest refusal.
You can be violent unprovoked / from an internal impulse in which case you're an aggressor, and you can be violent by response to an attack, in which case you're uncondemnable in self defense.
@@ubuntuposix Well the purpose of the vid is to have a radar to detect a malignant being (narcissistic and psychopathic traits) but the thing the therapist chose to put upfront to the public is a very dangerous road because you're incentivising the lambda person to amalgamate dangerous behaviours but the traits he chose to speak of are shared with non dangerous people having a hard time in life. Way to go everyone having these traits could from now on be incentivised to leave alone someone that. Would very probably need you to be there to be able to change their behavior. Maybe you're not Neuro atypical and you don't care... But I do
Narcissism is a result of abuse.
@@zita-m You can make a narcissist child by putting him in the center attention in the family and give him priority when it comes to material things (but he also has to have a particular brain-structure to become a narcissist). He'll start crying loudly at stores until you buy him his toy. Personally I seen that if you don't, they refuse to accept and grab the toy and run with it.
In a way, a narcissist is the opposite of a depressed person (who accepts the bad situation).
Trump is a good example of a narcissist. lol I remember when he showed a fake hurricane map because he didn't want to accept that he was wrong in a tweet.
They can perceive rejection even if you're just focused on something important you're trying to do, even for a moment so you don't drop hot food on the floor or something. If they don't get your attention immediately. I had one tell me while I was cooking food on the stove and I poured water in it while he was talking so it didn't dry out, he yelled at me you don't need to pour any water on that! Just listen to what I'm saying, just focus on me right now!
You just described my adult son, I’ve only found out recently that he is the most evil abusive person I’ve ever come across, I was horrified. It’s not like dealing with a normal person, they’re a creature from hell
Anyone dealing with a narcissistic loved one, family member, partner, friend, etc - remember you deserve to have boundaries, and another one that took me some time is letting the sadness go from feeling under attack a lot in my life. We can be free
Yes, free, but it is very very hard...
Especially when they claim it as "disrespectful" when you state your boundaries.
Bro yessss. Your reactions piss them piss them off. I actually started thinking i was the problem.. and still thibk i am.. when shes comes back every single week to start over her cruel bs @nohulse
ive noticed my step mother say she no longer talks to so and so. i know who she is and how she speaks to people. i rarely speak to her but i live in the same damn house. so
It's hard to believe that someone can be so selfish with no remorse 😢
They constantly seek attention, they insulte you and try to make you feel bad about yourself.
and they bully you as well
@@RyanTandy-dp1bhwell said 👍 hate fakes like 😂
Donald Trump in a nutshell!
@@RyanTandy-dp1bhlmao this is so edgy and try hard. Narcissists are the fakest people in the world. They can't stand not being feared and/or loved. Everything they do is attention seeking. They act above it but they're the most validation seeking losers of them all.
It's not about you, but have a pity comment since I'm sure it'll be nice to get to feel wronged so you have an opportunity to whip out your tough guy act again.
they also lose all their friends and never find any new ones.
I absolutely tore my narcissist apart. I used all his insecurities against him. I watched him crunble & completely unravel. He got played at his own game & lost. I walked away with such a sense of satisfaction. Don't play games with me, or I'll bite you!
Yep, NO CONTACT! No attention!
Another trigger is when they had formulated a cruel plan and you catch onto it an foil it from completing.
Exactly
Scary plans they have to be honest but God saved me 🙏🏽 He revealed all. 🥹🙏🏽
Lol, that sounds like caetoon villain when you say it that way, but yea
These diabolical narcissists are capable of even murder, run away, and don't tell them you are leaving, just go when they are out. Don't ever underestimate them or think they love you, they
can't, they are not capable of loving any one but themselves. God be with you.
Thank you I needed this advice ..I find myself justfying my mother .
Wrong. Narcissists don't love themselves
Mine is constantly trying to get me in remote places. I figure he is looking for a place to dump my body. I keep refusing to go on the "Nature" hikes to dangerous places. He tries the you never what to do what I like. Lol. No, I don't trust anything you suggest. Ever. There is always a sinister overtone.
@@sarahbranson6110 Smart. Trust your gut instincts. Read "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin Debecker. Hide the title and book from your Narc. in case they realize you are on to them and they decide to change tactics or expedite their plans. Never doubt your gut instincts.
Peace and safety to you.
Like toddlers in the body of an adult. RUN!!!
NARCISSISTS NEVER GROW UP!
Perfect!!
Thanks for sharing this post!❤⚘
Ain’t that the truth. If you suspect someone may have narcissistic tendencies, tell them NO or set a boundary and see how they react. If they flip out or act like a child because you aren’t giving them what they want, that’s a preview of what your relationship will look like with that person. Run for your life.
Yeah..100% this.
But if they accept your boundary, then you may never have the opportunity to build a relationship with them because they accepted your boundary
When I say boundary I don’t mean shutting them out, I mean just not giving into all their demands. In my experience narcissists repeatedly expect you to do things for them, especially when it’s not in your best interest. They want you to abandon yourself in order to give them what they want. For example, say you’ve been preparing for a major presentation at work and it’s the night before. You still have some things to do to make sure you are prepared. A narcissist loves to use times like these to suddenly have an emergency that they need you to help them with, even though you have already told them far in advance that you will be busy preparing for an important moment in your career. In this case, saying No is setting a healthy boundary. A healthy person would understand that you can’t help them (they probably never would have asked in the first place) and respect your answer. A narcissist would flip out, guilt trip you, remind you of all the ways they have helped you in the past, and essentially throw a fit until they get what they want out of you. They don’t care how your presentation goes, and if you say no they will spend the entire time arguing with you so that you can’t focus on your presentation and it will bring them joy knowing they sabotaged you.
@marisajane7229
Tough example , I think with narcissists it has to be continuous behavior, otherwise it’s tough to tell the history that led to that . I can see someone being giving for a long time and being treated less than and then the one time they need help someone picks their career over their relationship and they see it like a final straw and decide to also be selfish as a response .
I knew a girl with borderline and she was always lying and treating me like used toilet paper . One night I caught her lying and she was on a date, I bombarded her phone with texts just to ruin her date possibly . I was tired of all her lying for a year , she was very selfish (bpd has similar levels of selfishness as narcissists).
And then I back down and do what he wants to make him happy. And I am miserable beyond words. And i cover up how I feel and he thinks we are happy
This is so true!!! A narc person can be VERY CRUEL when you reject them... they have so many different faces.
Watch Donald Trump anytime he's asked a question he doesn't like, he percieves he's under attack and goes completely over the top.
So wild, normally people relish at the mere thought of being rejected, when it does happen actually, they are thrilled. Nothing better than a good rejection to feel alive.
I see what you did there
Amen Brother!
@@RegWhoI don’t think you have any idea what you are talking about maybe just bandwagon hate someone said he was a good example of a narcissist but he is far from a good example of one. He might be narcissistic but not to the degree that’s being discussed here.
Well said,Thank you, That explains alot and The Man talking in this Video definitely got my attention 🙏💋❤️
Lived through this. Cruel, ruthless and inhumane treatment, even towards the children.
Reminds me of my mother. I don’t remember her being nice to me or comfort me when I was little. When I grew up she’d decry me to my friends behind my back and try to make me look a bad person. So much so that my friends would tell me what she said. They would remark how surprised they were I ever grew up. She would Hide things I needed the next day. If she saw I liked something it would suddenly disappear. When I was diagnosed with kidney cancer she remarked that I didn’t get it from her. She enjoyed hurting me. BUT she was a staunch Roman Catholic and would run to church as fast as her legs could carry her. Her responses in church would be loud and just a fraction before anyone else’s do everyone could hear her devotion. When I got married at 20 she gave the money from my savings account she’d set up for me when I was a child to my husband saying she thought that he should be the one to have it. I overheard this as I was passing the room they were in otherwise I’d never have known. He became a cruel husband and I left him. I am 80 now and I still ask ‘why?’ RIP mummy.
I would add if they feel you have disrespected them in any way they will trigger.
Yes, Narcs can't handle any loss of face or shame or embarrassment, and they can never accept blame for anything.
You messed w their image.
That's called having a spine 😅
Yup so true, they also almost always will blame shift. My ex was calling me names been crazy toxic and at the end she cheated on me... When I left there was no apology nothing instead got more blame and flying monkeys 🤣
Yeah, but that happens even if you didn't disrespect them. For example, if you disagree with them, they see it as disrespect.
Everybody deserves respect, and should speak up if they're being disrespected. Narcs demand more than respect. They demand you lose yourself and become part of them.
Finally, someone talking about narcissism who is saying something spot on and clear, and useful.
This is EXACTLY TRUE!!!! I Never Knew What I was getting into until AFTER I was married!!! After my daughter was born my husband’s Narcissism Showed up.
SO SO TRUE THEY HATE WHEN YOU YOU KEEP SHINING BIGHT ✨️ I LEARNT THAT HARD WAY BETTER NOW THEN
NEVER
So true. And their cruelty is breath taking since they lack empathy.
my dad and stepmother ; do not like anything "fun". they don't laugh. they hate joy. oh and not to mention. die hard religious folks.
Wow so real😮
I am passive. Very laid back and don’t like conflict. Had a friend who is very narcissistic. After 10 years of her abuse I did the unthinkable 🎉Totally ghosted her. Changed my phone number and got off FB & all social media sites. She can’t stand it! 5 years later and she is still contacting friends and family! She even contacted my old work via FB during the holidays.. Cannot stand being rejected!
Not to be casting doubt on what you share, but honestly no one likes being rejected. You might have ghosted her for good reason, but to any regular person, being ghosted would create a lot of doubt about what’s going on in the relationship, and cause them to try and contact you out of care and concern for you, for themselves, and the relationship. The narc does it a bit differently though. It’s more if a desperation for getting supply back along with a disregard for whatever hurt they might have done to you. Like, normal ‘fight’- space created and the other wants to truly reconcile. With a narc, space is created and it’s still more like a demand of friendship without any working things out.
@@sonofhibbs4425 True but healthy people may feel hurt and confused, reach out but only once or twice via phone and they won't keep trying other channels or stalk via work even. That's weird.
Fatal attraction!😮😅
Or maybe they are completely normal and are wondering why you act like you need medication.
Maybe she liked you and you’ve lost a friend
yes, rejection sensitivity dysphoria. It's extremely painful and they protect themselves that way. It's toxic
When the person is not exactly how I want them to be I feel so much shame and rejected and I get mad and split. Never noticed that before I became self aware and started treatment. Having NPD is living hell. We hide it behind grandiosity but feel like shit all the time, roller coaster of emotions. Always mad, always in pain, always feeling like shit. People have no idea the hell we go through when you became self aware. It is horrible.
And then they act like it’s your fault that they hurt you.
A narcissist will seek revenge. It's very scary because, they will wait patiently until you forgot all about what happened and attack you out of no where!! I have two narcissistic people in my family and I don't let them in my circle of friends because they will definitely embarrass you and make it all about them. Be careful!!
Trump
@@vanaphill2454.... I don't think you know the true definition of a narcissist?
Sounds a bit like siblings who won’t let you be something you aren’t
THEY KEEP SCORE & ABOUT STUPID STUFF
Obama, Hillary, and the Bush's
It took an evil mind to recognize another devil, trust them to be themself but know the when you see them. Never underestimate your opponent and deceive them by being humble.
Truth 100% 5 mins before u reject them they act like a Saint. Great actors
I know for sure that the narcissists that read all these messages will not feel concerned as they will not recognise themselves in what is written about them ... they just can't ... they think these apply to the rest of the world ...not them ... they are blame less. Remember they have no self judgement and no sense of responsibility !.
He knows! They manipulate others playing victim, acting super fun, caring or acting knowledgable. They love attention. They always talk about themselves specially in public.
They are #1 and will leave if they can't be #1. They pretend to be amazing friends by sharing stuff, that they manipulate to look good. Image is everything.
I knew of one, that threw up to get his way as a kid. It is always their way or no way. Gossipers too.
@little@tar7811.....you are on point with everything that you mention. It's mind blowing and hurts like hell when you're in a relationship with a narcissist...been there..done that.
Im a narcissist, can you help me? I learned it from my parents
Narcissist hardly ever accept they are wrong or need help. Unless it bebefits them.
Are you sure you are a narcissist? Narcissist have zero empathy towards others feelings, needs or wants unless again it benefits them.
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
They are also very vindictive! If you reject them they will stop at nothing to destroy you. They also feed on chaos pitting people in their lives against each other, they love to feel that power of being in the middle, or peace maker.
This is literally me 😢 I’m trying to figure out why I’m the way I am
This is very true. If you're dealing with a narcissistic partner, I'd suggest run far away. He's right! They seem perfectly "normal" until they are angered. It is known as narcissistic rage. It is very scary.
Mine tried to kill me. They are super dangerous. Tear u down repeatedly. Evil at its finest
That’s terrible 😢
💯💯 same here, evil to the core
This might sound crazy, but do you think they can be not fully human? Like the Tares of the Bible we were warned against walking among us? They can’t tolerate true humans.
@Virgo_9 I've seen two ppls eyes go black, the one I ref above and another very evil one, scary scary stuf, def has had me wondering that same thing. Stay safe everyone and keep your discernment sharp 🙏🙏
@@highpeacetessI too have seen this. I have wondered if they are demonically oppressed. Not possessed but oppressed and the demons come out when they are “triggered.” Because they can act like normal humans and even kind normal humans but that’s the problem. It’s an act to feed their supply.
I could have hit the like button a million times and it still would not have been enough. Listen to this man!
This is my neighbour and her mother. Got 3 families evicted by destroying our landlords reputation. All because she made unrealistic demands n turned everyone n plays the victim . She made damaging accusations about the landlord (who is a very good person) to be moved, but ended up making us all homeless in the process. They are DANGEROUS.
From the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. A wicked man brings what is wicked out of the treasure in his heart.
Don't be bullied by a narcissist, I pray to God under my breath and then say "Not today satan, today is not the day and I am not the one you want to mess with!"
Always gotta bring Satan into it. Why?The ultimate scapegoat.
@@dimsdaysIt is Satan though. Narcissists have demons influencing them.
@@dimsdayssatan is NO scapegoat, he is an enemy. The father of lies, a murderer. Destroyer. We are to enforce his condemnation. Satan is pure evil. Very muvh NOT a scapegoat. But the author of rebellion, self centerness, and wickedness.
Wake up to the truth
A narrcasist is demon possessed. The devil was the first narrcasist. It's his personality
Because Satan is behind a narcissistic it is a devil(demon) of narcissism and the only way to get rid of it is if you accept JESUS CHRIST of NAZARETH as SAVIOR and repent and rebuke it!! That's why.question answered
Unfortunately, I can relate. My ex would say the most hurtful things to me and I would respond with the most hurtful things. Then, he would turn around and call me a narcissist when I would defend myself. How can he love me and treat me this way? It caused me so much depression and anxiety. I would take him back, thinking that he changed, but never did. Each time I responded the way he did, I was losing a piece of myself. It's been three weeks no contact and I'm ay peace. Please pray that I continue to be strong.
Same here! I would not respond with cruel words, because I would be so hurt and devastated. I would usually hang up on him and not speak to him for a few days or a week or so…
Of course, he would apologize and I would go back to him hoping things would be different and a few months later something similar would pop up… And he would be very disrespectful and reckless with his mouth and say hurtful and cruel things again… This last time we were a couple of thousand miles away from home at a tournament he was in, I changed my mind about going out to breakfast, because we had a banquet to attend in a few hours… He went berserk! Accused me of being selfish and inconsiderate, and made himself the victim in the situation, and threaten to put his hands on me… That was when the heavens opened up and said yet as far away from him and his negative energy as you can after he threatened me. He told me I could get the F out of this hotel! I saw a side of him that I did not knew existed! SMH I sat in the chair while he ranted and raved, and I’m sure people in that hotel must have thought they were in some type of violent movie audition…
He left and I called the airline explained to them that I had a domestic issue and I needed a flight out pronto! Because we were not due to go back home until another day and a half, but I refuse to stay in the same vicinity as someone that could be that Hateful, hurtful and cruel to me…
I packed my bags, and when he returned, I was ghost… And that was 152 days ago!!! I must admit the first week or so was very hard because I was expecting him to at least apologize and say that he wasn’t in his right mind or something… He called the mutual friend of ours, and she began to call me and I really, and truly had to know my worth And I was worth much much more than I was getting so I blocked him and began my healing journey and I am so very proud of myself!
Of course, mutual friends reach out, he has been calling them speaking about his sick mother, and he’s depressed, and he lost the love of his life, and he is at the end of his rope, blah blah blah I no longer will allow myself to be his emotional, punching bag and I am not gonna remain on that emotional roller coaster. He needs to go Seek some help because I cannot help him! All the love, compassion, encouragement, and support that I gave didn’t matter… So I am now giving that all to myself! You are more resilient than you know, and you are going to be absolutely fine!!❤️🙌🏼🏆😘
You can even better respond super calm if you can, like he has 0 controls over you. Saying hurtful things and escalating conflict may feed his narc needs.
Ladies, hang in there. Join fun groups and meet new people. Get involved in other things. Don't get hung up with mutual friends because you want a new future! Party on Ladies! You are worth it🎉🎉🎉❤
I went through the exact same thing. I was you. I went back thinking things would change, but things didn’t change. I lost myself in depression, anxiety and anger. He’d say hurtful things and I would return the insults. It was an awful time. It’ll take time to heal but please pray that he doesn’t try to reach out to reconcile the relationship. When you feel the urge to reach out, contact someone else instead. You deserve peace in your life. Block and delete him out of your contacts and your life.
Praying you keep strong to stay away.
If not, just know they always want the attention and power. You responding in kind to his hurtful comments keeps him in power. If you just agree with him (Even about you being a horrible human being--following that up with "why do you stay with me?") or stay completely silent that will take the wind out of his sails.
Normal people control not to be triggered much. Narcisssists are always pushed to the places, where they 💯% would be triggered. Thank You!!:))!!👍
One of the biggest triggers is when their lies and manipulation cause more harm and discomfort for them. Their circle breaks apart because they start seeing the holes in their story. They then hide in their shame rather than continue to make you look like the bad guy.
I know this all too well, and it deflates my entire energy source for the day. 😢
Am so sorry , that's totally understandable , may God heal you 🥺🤗
I was so afraid of being single my whole life, people have always said I wasn’t enough, couldn’t take care of myself, would never make anything of myself, told I’d never survive without a man to take care of me. My last boyfriend had to do a year in jail and I held down my household perfectly fine with him gone, sent him money, paid high phone bills to talk to him and that was my moment to live in the proof that all those things I’ve been told my whole life were nothing but lies. Be bold and go on your own! You will surprise yourself. It’s not as scary as you always thought, and being alone is actually freeing. I’ve never been happier and I’ve been purposefully single since 2017 and loving it! I even got my own motorcycle! Man! I love my life!
totally exhausting energy vampires
Choose yonGet out! Use wisdom and do it subtle shhh.. warning triggering anything’s possible: even death
Yep I miss my Older🪦Sister which was abuse by my father & Mum 🪦 well is with my Older sister in heaven. My family was already messed up from the beginning. It hurts 🤕 being a R_i_ family. Which has been toxic & toxicity & silent treatment 👿🤫🤫🤫...
Sometimes I'm amazed I survived my childhood. Us survivors of a narcissist parent should really be proud 👏 of ourselves right now ✅️ YOU ARE A SURVIVOR !
This is why it annoys me that hateful people post here in a knee-jerk reaction that Trump is a narcissist. His kids don't show any signs at all of being emotionally ruined their whole lives.
Depending on the personality and other factors you can be fine. My Dad has caused me and my youngest sister problems, but the other two are ok. He focused heavily on me, then her, which did shield them a bit, but they saw. But people who don't know my Dad think he's a lovely, charming man and can't understand why Mum left him. It depends on who they decide to attack and how much time they spend with someone. My Dad never attacked anyone outside the family, he is actually very intelligent, so we did get the brunt of it. I don't think he's as intelligent, so if he attacks those outside his family and didn't spend that much time with them, that could be an explanation
@@mick8473 The whole tribe seem to operate on narcissism. Empathy is not a priority and lashing out is a norm.
@@mick8473 Oh, they show signs. And Trump is a malignant narcissist - a special breed of narcissism.
Thank you , I'm proud of you too 💕☺️
So spot on for my cyber bullies.
Sooo true , the smallest thing can set them off into a complete rage plus meltdown, the end of the world basically 😮, they are sooo hard to be with because you never know when they get angry😮
. . . if it is possible for you, then go 'no contact', it's the only way you'll begin to heal.
I could not sit down in my daughter's home. She found it upsetting. But the gloves came off every few days. I lost safety so now I do not have contact. I have no hate I just know it is my freedom or life.
You are always on eggshells, afraid of speaking, saying the wrong thing, so you say nothing, and that's even wrong!! You did not communicate when they wanted!
Which is why if you realize that's someone you're dealing with you walk away forever the toxicity it's not something anyone should have to tolerate in their life no matter who the person is even family
Couldnt even speak to my ex in the end, could not have a laugh, took everyrhing literally and would have a complete meltdown over everything and anything
He's absolutely right. Grew up with a covert narcissistic mother. Was so very damaging and took until I was 70 years old to fully recover. I'm 71 now.
That's a tough one. I believe John Cleese said something similar, he was still walking on egg shells around his Mom into her old age and didn't work it out until late in life. It's good young people today can get informed. I wish people would stop saying Trump has NPD though. Blatantly his kids are to healthy and sticking around
Oh wow. I'm glad you reached recovery.
When the narcissist knows that you have figured him out you will experience him full of rage. How dare you figure him out!
He is talking about my old boss. The worst part is she was my clinical supervisor (a therapist) at the treatment center I worked at. She was “triggered” the final time when I set my boundary of not working 60+ hours weekly (like she does to feel needed and in power with the clients) and then she fired me for it.
_"Narcissists can act very healthy until they're triggered."_
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 THIS IS PRECISELY WHAT NOBODY UNDERSTANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't think narcissists can act healthy until triggered. There are signs before they get triggered. What he is describing can also be someone with an insecure attachment style or borderline personality disorder. Because they are good until triggered and it's not because they were wearing a mask.
@ref_healthyliving3118 I am not religious person, but teach bible prophecy from a scholar's non-religious view. There's a lot of narcissism in religious people. In turn, I hear from a lot of them when I prove their beliefs are wrong and unfounded according to the very bible they claim they are following.
@ref_healthyliving3118 exactly thank you!
@@suras8984 I had borderline personality disorder most of my life and made a full recovery. Even at my most sick I never lashed out at other people when triggered. People with BPD tend to attack themselves, not other people.
@@rebecca_stone That may be true for yourself and people with quiet borderline personality disorder but that is not the case for most people with general bpd. I am happy you made a recovery. You should be proud of yourself. It takes self awareness and dedication to heal from deep wounds/chidhood wounds.
Weak judges side with them because they cry, drama queens and kings, assert themselves with vigor and they are great actors and actresses.
That sounds more like BPD...
Narcissists are Oscar worthy actors. Very manipulative, highly addictive, very charismatic and charming, they can easily fool your friends and even your parents so you have no support from anyone. They just can't relate what they know of the narcissist and how much abuse you say is happening to you. If you can, get a therapist for validation and help you find enough of your real self to get away.