It would be pretty bad but then you add the fact that your dad has millions in the bank and lives in a mansion with a Rolls Royce he uses to do drive-by shootings and has a tendency of targeting family members to kill violently just for the fun of it... that would be a fecked up nightmare to live in...
Kevin: [robs 12 million immediately] Me: *Alright! Now you can finally live a good life and actually die happy!* Kevin: [keeps putting his freedom at risk] Me: *wtf Kevin*
@@LisaD478 Probably a level I should be concerned about, but also one that wishes people a happy birthday hoping to bring positivity in some weird way. Happy birthday. :)
Kevin: *Gets an assasin named "The Winter Soldier" Also Kevin: This guy's gotta be like 12 The Winter Soldier, Credited with 2 dozen assasinations within the last 20 years: Pardon?
@@mocha4745 "I just happened to be carrying a very sharp knife and I had some jam on my hand after eating a peanut and jam sandwich the moment before so it slipped and stabbed ya┐(￣ヮ￣)┌!" Omg, imagine if someone died and on their tombstone there's just a shrugging emoji!
OMG you moved to Serbia, i live in Belgrade, Serbia,, i know i may be overreacting but not a lot of people evem mention my country or my people bc no body knows about us
Just watching the first 2 seconds and seeing Jim Pickens telling me to “Collect them all” makes me regret only buying the CallMeKevin one and not both of them.
In a world, where no one can leave their homes... One man, on a mission, to never have to leave his home, turns loose on the virtual world to wreak havoc and commit crime. Call me Kevin stars as thug life. Because not all heroes wear capes. And if they do...they are probably undercover cops named winter soldier...
11:37 imagine being 8 and living on the side of the road because your dad abandoned you and he just sends you a whoopee cushion
It would be pretty bad but then you add the fact that your dad has millions in the bank and lives in a mansion with a Rolls Royce he uses to do drive-by shootings and has a tendency of targeting family members to kill violently just for the fun of it... that would be a fecked up nightmare to live in...
@@vetreas366 there needs to be a movie or TV show based off this
your profile picture, your username AND your taste in youtubers? swag. B)
Am I a terrible person for laughing at this?
Honestly I think I'd be grateful he sent me a whoopee cushion and not a hit man given his track record
Kevin: "Dead friends make the best friends"
Also Kevin: *Starts every video with "Hello Friends"*
um
Crawling in my skiin
Soon the time will come
You’re a ghost Harry
I’m already dead just inside
Kevin killed me but im still alive because im immortal
The Game Secretly Roasted Trudeau(Doing Black Face)😂😂😂 2:06
Dear big Kev, please finish the Resident Evil 7 series!! You're almost at the end and it's about to get real good. Yours sincerely big Ry
I don’t wanna be NOLAN I wanna be THUG!
I’ve found the smarter you are the more likely to get good cards in blackjack
My favorite era of Kevin
The train robberies only work if you enact them at their exact time, both ingame and in real life.
Hearing your voice say amnosia again hit me hard
Quarantine neck beard is coming in well XD
Kevin: I'm gonna rob a train
Me: ok Arthur Morgan
Kevin: we gotta rob a train Dutch
Me: da fak
how did KEVIN of ALL people feel guilty about something
As the red hot chili peppers would say give it away give it away now
Can you do a Bitlife where you try to live in prison as much as possible?
We need a Thug/Shrek Life documentary
*song from sims 1 playing in the background*
I don’t understand why Kev is complaining, he died at the age of 69, pretty nice if you ask me.
I'm so disappointed you didn't name any of your children "Bit". Kevin, you're smarter tha- Kevin, you're better than this.
00:25 reminds me of Nathan from Misfits, just me?
"local man commits EVERY crime imaginable, sentenced to death 4 times, gets off the hook, robs trains, dies of natural causes"
Emerald_Lord sounds like a florida man
@@kapil3627 What I was about to say
At age 69
All he’s missing is terrorisim
tell me you live in florida without telling me you live in florida
I'm really digging the Sims 1 music in the background, it goes well with the murder
this killed me 😂
julia :3 just like the people in the video
i read this in kevin’s voice this honestly sounds like something he’d say
It also goes well with Kevin kicking babies.
Waddah A. We even BB h
He made his fortune at 4:20 and died at 69.
His life was truly nice.
He already had that money before 4:20
@@crad5476 they mean when kevin robbed the train at 4:20
@@Crooked_Man_Havik Ah, I remember now.
Perfect times
LMAO
News reporter: "How did you get a net worth of 2 million?"
Kevin: "The secret ingredient is crime."
You just start with a net worth of 12 million
Fucking love super hans
I once had about 1.3 billion but an update deleted that savev
I laughed for about an hour after he said that
And robbing a train at exactly 4:20
Imagine working at a bank seeing Shrek equipped with astun gun sneaking around
This post was made by the meme gang. Also, heyo Finn O
Hey Finn O
Also with a fortnite skin
"Hey there friends I'm Kevin and today were playing Payday 2 IRL?!" *Stuns a guard*
Payday 2 in a nutshell
Kevin:“BitLife but I become a criminal mastermind” FBI: Not this guy again
I feel the FBI is just very confused with what Kevin is doing on his computer
@@AxxLAfriku I lie because my girlfriends are my sisters
At this point they don't take him seriously anymore. He could probably murder someone and get away with it~
@@LisaD478 fbi is that you telling us something
He's good with us.
I once got put into juvie at age 7 from licking someone's tooth in bitlife. Love that.
“They had us in the first half not gonna lie”
@@kanyesrighttesticle “they had us in the first grade not gonna lie”
i got sent to prison for licking someone's nose
@@kanyesrighttesticle I mean this is a CMK comment section under a bitlife video so I honestly didn't think it was about real life
I think you get sent to a mental institute instead of a prison.
People fight weird in this game. You're running around poking larynxs and stretching noses while other people snap your cheeks and squeeze your head.
PsyintZ I’m pretty sure the verbs and body parts are randomly generated, which I quite enjoy lol
I was once able to lick someone’s esophagus or something like that
PsyintZ B A N G T H E B U T T O C K S
i’ve had someone stab my skull and i was still alive. and i slap someone’s lip and they die
@@lovelykitty42 irl or in game?
Thug Life is the only person who can say "I didn't choose the thug life, the thug life chose me"
Wait did his mom choose the Thug Life?
I didn't choose the thug life, my mom picked it out for me
@@ailia8487 lmao
Lol.
"i didnt choose the thug life, my mommy chose it for me."
The careers advice people at my school never even *mentioned* the possibility of train robbery...
I feel cheated.
That's because its a secret life hack they don't want you to know about.
Cheated, but not robbed 😂
“I already have my life planned out mom” -Kevin 2020
Kevin: [robs 12 million immediately]
Me: *Alright! Now you can finally live a good life and actually die happy!*
Kevin: [keeps putting his freedom at risk]
Me: *wtf Kevin*
On his defense, Thug is not very smart
I once worked in bitlife very hard, got 32 milion dollars
I got 100 mil from lottery
"ugh, NO! He keeps *calling the police* on me when *I try to kill him.* He's *such* a bad brother!"
Ah, the two genders: Thug and Shrek
Blank Jim Pickens of course being god
you have 666 likes i’m not gonna ruin that
@@somerandomassguyontheinter2869 i appreciate that
Which one is grognak Chesterfield attorney at law Esquire M.D?
Kevin has a suprising amount of shreks watching him
12:00 "you're pregnant again! How many babies can you have?" The one time I played bit life my character birthed 18 children and lived to be over 100.
wow, the most I had was 14 and I think she's the same one who died a cocaine addicted prisoner :P at like 42
I had like 10 kids before I turned 29
You are BitLife's God, creating life and living over the limit.
Mine too
I had 23
How does Jackseptieye manage to make and whole life last like 5 episodes and Kevin makes it last like 15 minutes
5 episodes for 1 oife dear god he has to do so much of the small Things like Go to the Gym 100 every year to strech it that far
Jack gets too sidetracked with it that's why
Hey, jacksfilms and rtgame have many differences
kevin finna speedrun bitlife
"Now that I look and feel good, abandon my son."
Kevin in Belgrade: "Trains here don't run on time"
Correct. I have never had anything on time here. Welcome to Serbia.
this is starting to become as long as the sims series. im here for it
I'd say I'm also here for it, but that's not my name.
@@IamaPERSON My name fits your comment so well lmao
@@SheriffHotSauce haha, what a coincidence!
hi i love your username and profile pic!
@@amethystlovesGR awww thanks
"We gotta rob a train Dutch"
-Yeehaw Kevin
* throws cowboy hat *
Rahul I have a pLaN Arthur
We just need SOmE MoNey
TaHiTi
MiCaH hAs a PLaN
Leaves school
*"I HAVE A PLAN"*
-Attempts to rob a train
*DUTCH 100*
He just needs a bit more money. One more job
*P L A N*
I have a plan!
I have a plan, Arthur, I just need two million in taxpayer dollar.
@@Eejit *DUTCH WHY DO YOU NEED 2 TRILLION DOLLARS IN TAX PAYERS MONEY?*
Kevin: *Attempts to steal a car, gets caught, gets beaten, then sues the guy before losing*
Also Kevin: *Surprise pikachu face*
You don't even have to steal as an exorcist, just be like "Oh no this necklace is causing the haunting I'll remove it for you"
"...and by the way, turns out ghosts like to hide in wallets..."
@NotYourGreatestPlan I lost it at "goldschlong the 57th"😂😂😂
no
@NotYourGreatestPlan holy mother of god
Day bore ragnarok of asking Kevin to make one extremely serious hour-long letsplay without any funny editing for April Fools
Cranberry Vodka & he can’t kill anyone
I like that, that's original!
I'd watch it, my life is shit anyways
@@niamhreilly2815 Okay now you've crossed a line there. That's impossible. Too much to ask for.
Sims 4 Zero Kills HARDCORE MODE (boy, you know something is wrong when this title is entirely possible)
Hey there friends my name is Bitlife and we’re going to being playing some more Kevin
Don't play with Kevin that's kinky
@@Stella.22g don't tell me what to do
Kevin: *breaks games on a daily basis*
Bitlife & Superliminal: *hold ma frames*
That's a game I'd love to play
Hey there Kevin my name is bitlife and we're going to be playing some friends
Thug Life: dies at the age of 69
Everyone: Nice
I was waiting for this comment.
Nice
He also stole the train at 4:20 pm
It's just too perfect
nice
spoiler dude
man went to Ukraine...only if he knew what would happen there 2 years later
“Just cause I keep abandoning and killing the other children doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have more!” -Ouranos to Gaia at some point prolly
legend
Day 336 of wishing Kevin a happy birthday everyday.
Happy birthday, Kevin.
Dedication 336. Pun intended
What level of insanity is this here?
@@LisaD478 Probably a level I should be concerned about, but also one that wishes people a happy birthday hoping to bring positivity in some weird way. Happy birthday. :)
Nearing a year jeez
So when this reaches 365 days of wishing Kevin a happy birthday everyday, do we wish the comment a happy birthday?
Kevin: Attempts to rob every 4:20 train
Also Kevin: dies age 69
Nice.
Shit you right, NICE
Testing me
It's the natural order
I'm too dumb to get it can someone explain?
Kaka Hass unfunny sex and weed joke
Kevin: “I’ve never seen a train in real life”
Thomas the train: “ Thomas knew it was time to say wassup”
Kevin: *Gets an assasin named "The Winter Soldier"
Also Kevin: This guy's gotta be like 12
The Winter Soldier, Credited with 2 dozen assasinations within the last 20 years: Pardon?
I was waiting for the comment that would mention this!
Poor Bucky 🤣
This the best shit I've ever seen. How is he so natural in crime is beyond me.
Kevin, unprompted, confessing to candy theft at age 12 is peak good Catholic boy behavior
Kevin: Hello friends!
Also Kevin: Dead friends are the best friends!
Liam Read we’re secretly all dead inside
69th like-nice
10:12
I had diabolical thoughts.
I had diabolical thoughts.
I had diabolical thoughts.
I had diabolical thoughts.
Don't we all?
I just love the, “Shrek wants blood” line.
I found my favorite content creator
Kevin: [drops out of school]
Kevin a minute later: How can I get smarter?
Hmmm...
Kevin: " i hope you enjoying bitlife because i certainly am"
NPC's in bitlife: *Kevin i wish we could say the same*
Bitlife should put a new way of dying
"You died by CallmeKevin for no reason at all"
Yes
ur epitaph in Jim Pickens’ graveyard be like
“i don’t even know why i killed you”
Omg yes
Yes
@@mocha4745 "I just happened to be carrying a very sharp knife and I had some jam on my hand after eating a peanut and jam sandwich the moment before so it slipped and stabbed ya┐(￣ヮ￣)┌!"
Omg, imagine if someone died and on their tombstone there's just a shrugging emoji!
“We’re going to ukraine”
Hits different
A fan from UKRAINE here! This is so funny, I am happy that you had "fun" in our country :D
Too soon
My names Nolan and the “I don’t wanna be Nolan” part was funny
Nolan Harrison same my name is also Nolan
RabidDucky ayy
Ayyy Nolan gang where you at?
not here.
Everyone should be happy to be themselves😃
Thug life: *dies at age 69*
Me: *nice*
Same
RIP Kevin
Died at age 69
Cause: Death by Snu Snu
Not gonna lie a mummy driving Rolls Royce Phantom, while holding a bow and arrow, is probably the greatest escape of all time.
Kevin : Im gonna kill my brother.
Brother : Calls the Cops.
Kevin : His such a bad brother.
Says the Killer.
So bit life does have a bit of a hidden karma system, crimes are easier to get away with if you do a few good deeds first.... Most the time😅
I still waiting for "Desperate Housewives But Its In 2020" video
Yes
"why did you commit more crimes"
" The casino made me do it"
Alternate title: "Call Me Kevin Plays Bitlife. Exactly what you Expect will Happen."
Kevin went to Ukraine well I hope Russia doesn’t kill him
Thought the same
Kevin when he plays bitlife: CRAZY MAN! KILLER
Us: kevin isn’t that just you irl?
16:48, I thought it said Terrible married Danilo Tragic. Was very disappointed when i reread it. Terrible Tragic would've been a great name.
Kevin, you should tell Jim to post a video of himself playing BitLife. We'd love to see that.
I am a PERSON, and I second this!
"I'm gonna go to Ukraine!"
uh oh
This is the fastest I’ve clicked.
Same, but I typed
I am a PERSON Hi Real person :)
@@fatmarley6750 hola, my dude
Day 319 of asking Kevin to play yandere simulator
Bionicarmy04 that would be awesome
This will never happen, I dare you
This request will never get irrelevant. I will forever support it despite of the haters.
Still, it’s a shit game
Yes
Callmekevin goes to ukraine. What a video
Does anyone else have a sudden urge to rob a train? No, just me.
"The problem with being very stupid is that your not smart enough to figure out how to become smart" - Abracadabra Lincoln
there may come a day when i don’t enjoy kevin’s red dead 2 references
but today is not that day
d u t c h
Daniel Salley I had a goddamn plan!
That day will never come
“First I was too young, then I didn’t have enough money, then I’m old”
I felt that...
OMG you moved to Serbia, i live in Belgrade, Serbia,, i know i may be overreacting but not a lot of people evem mention my country or my people bc no body knows about us
Oh no don't go to Ukraine
Just watching the first 2 seconds and seeing Jim Pickens telling me to “Collect them all” makes me regret only buying the CallMeKevin one and not both of them.
"Just to clarify I've never done crime in this life"
Videogames included?
Criminal, makes sense “ mastermind” is a bit off though
Kevin: "he's trying to kill me with a spoon"
me: *has flashbacks to the very slow murderer with the extremely inefficient weapon*
“I’m really unhappy and really unhealthy.” yeah me too
You weren't a criminal Mastermind before?!
Finn O the real question
Hey Finn O. He's always been
I’m not gonna lie, I like basically all of Kevin’s videos, but this one made me laugh more than I have in a long ass time. Keep it up Thug.
For real though
Watching him move to Ukraine for safety in 2022: 🤦♂
Literally me on TH-cam watching the same video and getting bored
Also me: watching Kevin repeatedly and dying of laughter
This is probably the 12th time I've watched this one. Just this one
1:04 DUTCH WE GOTTA HIT THE TRAIN DUTCH
WE NEED NORE MONEY ARTHUR
That thug life with Kevin “ robs a train right away. Train doesn’t come”🤣
Joshua let’s play 😂😂😂
In a world, where no one can leave their homes...
One man, on a mission, to never have to leave his home, turns loose on the virtual world to wreak havoc and commit crime.
Call me Kevin stars as thug life.
Because not all heroes wear capes. And if they do...they are probably undercover cops named winter soldier...
Me watching from the future when you left the US for Ukraine
10:49
I can't stop laughing
Police: We got him again, now to give him a whole day to escape.
4:26 Kevin literally turned into Dutch what the hell