Her Mom knows the truth! I am proud of Heather!!!! She has no control over who her folks are, how can they be mad at HER? Actually says more about them than it does about her. You’re a great brother!
exactly , they are punishing her for her mothers behaviour , for him to think he was the father who is guilty ? only one person so to move the guilt from her she has passed it to the child , she has played a very clever trick on the man again because she has deflected the guilt to her daughter and yet again she is not taking responsibility for her actions
Here’s a heartfelt option for Heather, if she ever wants to fill that hole of her parents not wanting her! My wife and I would whole heartedly take her as our daughter. To love and be present in her life 200%, to be the parents she deserves. We except her unconditionally as we would except you and your family unconditionally. We live in Idaho and is a pretty close middle ground between the two of you.
I am an only child whose parents constantly told me in various ways that I wasn't wanted...I wish I had a brother like you come along with an open heart. I appreciate your love for your sister and commend your entire family for supporting you and her.
How awful. I'm sorry you have that hurt. But we fans of Curiosity Inc. make up our own little family. I developed some true affection for many of the commenters, though I've never met them.
Well done, Alex. Her mom lied and Heather is being punished for being born... what a shame. Heather, I am glad you guys found each other. Amazing. Parents cant lie anymore.
I did an Ancestory DNA test and discovered i had a brother and two sisters. Same father. I'm 70 and wish I'd found out years ago. They're such lovely people.
I found out when I was 17 I had a brother I didn’t know about. His mother refused my father any parental rights and married his friend instead. His name was put on the birth certificate. When my parents found out his mother had passed away, my mom reached out to him. At some point he figured out his father wasn’t his father biologically. Although my sister and I don’t really have a relationship with him, my father and he had a good relationship until my father’s passing. When my brother needed a kidney because of a heredity kidney disease, I volunteered to be tested. (His mother and his three sisters from her all carried the gene so they were not candidates.) it didn’t matter that I didn’t grow up knowing him. He was my father’s son. BTW, his wife wound up being a match, so I wasn’t needed.
I had a late Christmas present when I found out through 23andme that I had a half sister. We both always wanted a sister, and I felt alone (everyone died) and we found each other........and unlike you both sets of parents are deceased, so we didn't have the issues that Heather had. Hugs to you Heather and isn't it just wonderful Alex!!!!
I’m so sorry your parents are acting this way. I am an adoptive parent. It’s not the same I know but she is my child! If she ever wants to find her bio parents I’d support her. A child cannot have too much love from parents, whether blood or not. I was also a foster parent and am still mom to many of them. I really hope they come around but that is their issue not yours. You didn’t do anything wrong. Nor do you deserve this. Surround yourself with people who love, support and encourage you. You are brave, a warrior. You should be proud of yourself. Love shouldn’t come with strings attached. Best wishes.💐
This was one of the most touching videos you have ever produced. You honoring your lost sister is very admirable and honorable of you. This brought tears to my eyes but it shows how great your character is. Your sister Heather should be very proud of you. Kudos to you Alex.😻😻😻
A beautiful yet sad story. Especially for Heather. Her Mom should be ashamed and embrace her daughter. I can imagine it was difficult for the Dad that raised her but look now he could lose her forever. I was raised by a man who wasn’t my Dad and he loved and protected me. I grew in his heart and nothing could change that. Heather I pray her parents wake up before it’s too late.
I was adopted at birth and was told at a early age that I was but it didn't matter to me they were and still are my mom and dad even though my dad passed away 12 years ago and today 10/29 would have been his 89th birthday! I still have my mom and I still love them both today and forever it doesn't matter if your blood I still love them!!
I have 5 daughters. My fourth daughter I met when she was only 8 months old. I married her mom, and we had another daughter. I raised her as she is my daughter. I can't ever imagine life without her!! God bless you both Alex!!!
My heart truly goes out to Heather. She has done nothing wrong. It's her mother who is in denial of her actions which brought Heather into this world. It also sounds like her mother has lied to her husband years ago. I just pray that one day Heather's parents wake up and smell the coffee!! It is their loss that they have cut her out of the family. She seems like a wonderful person. So glad she has such a wonderful brother in Alex!
I just listened to Heather's podcast. I had no idea that she was going through such heartbreak. Thank you for being such a kind, open hearted person Alex. Heather and you are blessed to have found each other.
Maybe there are reasons that's not so easy for them right away. Like how old of "teenagers" were they when they were "dating", and how long were they "dating".
I did and she is a helluva of lot braver and much more honest than her Mom will ever be. Sorry I know she's still your Mom but right now she's acting like a real. Well the whole family needs to wake up because you did NOTHING WRONG HEATHER. And when they do come in asking for your forgiveness Heather and God let's all hope and Pray that they do. You just make them Wait aliitte okay ? LOL
Heather, you won the lottery with this guy for a brother....wow, Alex you made me cry....and I am sure Heather and anyone else watching this....I pray, that her parents findit in their hearts to not only accept Heather back into their fold, but to also allow you Alex, and your family to join them too,
what the hell kind of mother punishes her child... when THE MOTHER WAS THE ONE WHO CREATED THIS FAMILY SECRET? Why would the non- biological father SHUN THE DAUGHTER WHO IS INNOCENT AND NOT DIRECT HIS ANGER TO HIS LYING WIFE? People are strange and Heather was obviously lucky to find an adoring, open, giving brother to lean on. Alex you and your family are good people. Heather was directed to you for a reason. I hope you can reunite with Heather soon. She deserves better from her family.
Quite a head shaker, but perhaps it is guilt or embarrassment that makes people think of themselves before innocent children. Not right, but a possible explanation.
@@eileenw6002 it seems like the only logical explanation of why it turned out like this. If that is the case mom and dad need to get over it and be ashamed of making their daughter suffer for their own decisions and the hurt and embarrassment or whatever it is. Life is short. Even if you live to be old at the end of your life it will seem like it was over as quick as the blink of an eye.
This breaks my heart for Heather. Allentown Gal I think you described it all perfectly. Heather’s parents have an opportunity to expand the family, to forgive each other, to give unconditional love as a parent, biological or not! I am shocked at her eldest daughter and sibling she grew up with!! Where is their empathy??? I am very sad indeed for Heather. What a beautiful post of support Alex. I am so glad you have each other in this. Your joy in finding your sibling is palpable. ❤️ I hope Heather finds peace in the situation. We are all here sending her our love and support in this time.
you took the words right out of my comment. well said. from the 'dad' viewpoint i'd be pretty pissed if my partner knew our child may be somebody else's but I sure as hell wouldn't be cross with the kid i raised as my own. how dare you not be my bio child, like it's their fault.. well, karma will get them as they are now being slagged off on social media by total strangers across the world~ . it's what they deserve
Thanks Alex for sharing. I went through this when I discovered two half sisters and invited them into my life. I lost my mother and a number of relatives. My sisters belong to our dad. I’m sorry Heather is going through this.
Some people are just so unbending and there is no changing them. Heather is a strong woman. I love that you get to know each other and learn from each other for the rest of your lives. It is tragic, and yet at the same time empowering knowing Heather has a whole new family.❤️🌺
Thanks so much for doing this episode. I am a genealogist who is working with someone who just found her biological father (deaceased) through DNA testing and a new sister, having been raised adopted but an only child. Her sister is thrilled but her adoptive mom is giving her grief. Heather's NPE broadcast and DNA Gone Wrong sites will be so helpful. Please thank Heather for me.
Alex, I wish you were my brother. What a loving and supportive vlog. Sending you and Heather the best. I also believe her parents will one day come around, after their shock and embarrassment has worn off.
Unfortunately, Heather is the victim of her mother's inability to forgive herself for being human, she made a mistake. Years ago, having a baby out of wedlock was not as acceptable as it is today. She married without sharing with her husband the fact that she was pregnant by another man. So she lied thinking that the truth would remain buried. Heather was not a mistake, she is a gift from God, and it's sad that her parents are blaming her for trying to do a good thing for the father who raised her. Shutting her out of their lives is their lose. God, in His infinite wisdom, gave you each other to love, support, and accept each other. You are a good, loving "little" brother for your big sister, and she is a good "big" sister for you. I pray that having each other will continue to bless you, and that the love you share will continue to blossom. Peace to you both, be easy with yourselves.🤗
Amen !! I hope that if they are Christian people a pastor can speak to them about forgiveness ... their marriage needs it desperately , once they learn forgiveness they can apologize to their innocent daughter ..
How could a mother choose to disown her own daughter? ...shame on Heather's mom! Heather you are so lucky to have found your brother...he's one in a million!
Hearing you don’t share DNA doesn’t change who your parents are 🤷♀️ I don’t understand how her parents are behaving this way to their own child. It is your child. Love is love. I found out at 13 that my dad, the man that raised me from 2, wasn’t my blood father....it didn’t make my heart change. The man who helped create me obviously didn’t care enough to hang around or fight for me, maybe didn’t know I was around....but my dad was my dad and he said and felt the same way. He actually didn’t want me to know the truth because he was afraid I’d think he loved me less then my “half” sister. Life is short. Love is love. Blood isn’t thicker then love. To alienate Heather is sad and senseless honestly. It is unacceptable. You said it so well.
I found out when I was 58! Yes, they lied to me for 58 years! Yet in a way, I really didn't care. My dad was the best dad he could be. He married my mom when she was pregnant in the 50's and they were friends. It was one of the ways people dealt with unexpected pregnancies back then. It still doesn't seem real in a way, but DNA, you know? I agree with everything you said.
@@aksez2u I actually said the same thing in my own 13 year old way....shrugged and said so? Now as a middle age woman with kids I understand the emotion of it then i didn’t. But the day they told me, my dad took just me out to lunch, gave me long speeches about how he loved me no matter what, in my child mind I thought I was being prepared for my parent to tell me they were getting divorced🤷♀️ so I think after all that when they sat me down together and explained my mom got pregnant with me at 15!!! And then met, fell in love with me dad and actually married him several years later and he wasn’t actually my biological father....well to me it didn’t change much long as nothing in my home was changing. It did eventually explain a lot of differences between my sister and I and I’m glad of course to know but it still didn’t change my heart. Your Dad is the one who worries when you go out on a date, teaches you to ride a bike, freaked out 1st time he tried to teach me to drive, etc. that’s ya dad. 💜💜💜 Sorry you found out so late in life but as you said it really doesn’t change much.
Good for you; your sister is lucky to have a brother like you. I agree with your sentiments completely...if I ever found out that my daughter wasn't my biological daughter, my love for her wouldn't be diminished one bit. How could a father possible react that way?!
@@MsRedsphere I am just trying to have a discussion with an objective perspective. Nobody deserves to be publicly bashed without us knowing both sides of the story (or at all, really). We don't know what or why happened from both sides. Sorry if you prefer to publicly bash strangers, including me.
Beautiful message, Alex, and you are so right. Life is short-too short to let anger lead the way. Glad you & Heather decided to open your hearts and welcome one another with open arms. Wishing you and your families all the best. Happy 18 month anniversary to your siblinghood!
Been there Alex. I have shared my story with Heather and how people of her mother's (and my mother's) generation rate social status and family secrets over the welfare of others. My mother has only just admitted at 80 years old how badly she treated me and my brother (we supposedly have the same father) because she was afraid of what people thought. Ironically, they ALL knew but never let on that they knew. Thank you for your support of Heather. You just went up another notch on my Alex meter. LOL
She probably feels embarassed that her husband found out her secret. I wished they'd take it as water under the bridge and move ahead to a happier future.
She probably denied it to her husband in the first days of panic and now she has to double and triple down on that lie. That's for her to sort out since she decided to deceive her husband back then. I mean I can imagine how hurtful that must be for the guy so he'd rather believe this is all one big lie. Very sad and disgraceful on Heather's mother's side.
@@phangirlable It may be possible mom didn't know for sure if she was pregnant before she got with her current husband but the response towards Heather of the news is not understandable to me from either parent.
@@karenmilligan5597 It doesn't much about her morals if she broke up with Alex's father and hooked up with another guy soon enough to have a "premature" baby and worse that after 30+ years still lying about it and blaming Heather. Lies have a way of turning around and biting you in the rear and usually it's the innocent that pays the price.
I have a blended, crazy family. I call my siblings Brother and Sister no matter if they are full, half, step. We have each other forever. We belong together, despite the flaws of our parents; we are innocent and love each other. I do not understand how a true parent can guilt their children for the actions of the parent. Why? It is so wrong to do that. I would have totally loved to be born into the perfect family. I wasnt. So I make the best of what I do have. You are sister and brother. Love, support and be there for each other as you do. You are doing the right thing.
Until my last day, I will never understand some people. Life is so incredibly short. Sometimes when others burn bridges and hurt you immensely, you gain more in the long run. Nobody needs that in their lives. And Alex, what a wonderful, truly sweet thing to do for your sister.
I know what you guys are going through. I was given away at the of 40 days old. Never knew my dad my mom I meet her when I was 21yrs old. Saw her twice and then she passed. To your sister tell her she not alone . The pain runs deep. Wishing you and your sister and family the best .
What an absolutely despicable way to treat your own daughter (blood or not), mom, sister! It was very hard to listen to the podcast without wanting to cry... Heather, this is not your fault and it certainly isn’t your fault the way your family has shunned you. They are the ones causing you pain! I pray that God gives you strength, love, happiness and grace for your family (it would be hard for me)! I’m so very happy that you two found each other after all these years. It truly is a blessing! Alex I absolutely adore you for the support you give your sister and the upstanding young man you are! May God continue to bless you and your family! ♥️♥️♥️
The affirmation of love, for your beautiful Sister Heather, is apparent through not only your words but the emotions you radiate, as you speak of her, her journey & your relationship. You are both So BLESSED to have found one another.
I cannot imagine how she must feel. I can't imagine my family turning their backs on me. Thank you Alex for standing with her and helping her through such a difficult time. It shows just how much you care for her.
I just listened to Heather’s podcast. It is excellent, as she is so articulate, authentic, and seems to be at peace with a situation over which she had no control! She is clearly such a kind and loving person. You two are so fortunate to have found each other.
I'm going to pray for her Mom and dad 🙏🙏🙏💔😢 One day they will understand and have to come to grips with THEIR choices, JUST LIKE THE REST OF US! Heather, I'm glad you have a brother like Alex!!
Alex, that was wonderful. Love that you put your heart out there. So sorry that Heather's mom and dad can't be more loving toward her. The man who raised her is her dad. She may have a different father, and he would have loved her too But that original bond between her and her dad that raised her is very important. That love is what is needed in this world. You are so loving, Alex. I'm glad you found each other.
It is such a shame that Heather had to go through such a tough time. The man who raised her may not have been her biological father but he is her DAD. Now he doesn't have a daughter & that is a choice that he & his wife have made. Heathers birth had nothing to do with her but alot to do with her mother not being honest. Heather has gained an awesome brother, sister in law & niece & nephews. I'm glad you found each other. Much love & respect to you all xxx
A family's supposed to support each other, whether you agree with their choices or not. It's that simple. As long as they're not hurting themselves or anyone else, you let them BE themselves whether you agree with it or not. Well done, Alex.
This is a wonderful video! I agree with Alex and what he thinks about this situation. I'm proud of both of you. Heather, it was a wonderful thing you did by seeking the truth. All of this happened so long ago that people should forgive. I'm also happy you two are close.
Around the same time as you I found out that I also had a sister I also took the chance to get to my sister Kathy it was the best thing I done in my life Alex stand tall Heather and you did nothing wrong
A Father is someone who is more than just conceived a child, they are a person who looks after you, and helps you grow up. Her father is always going to be just that. If her mother and father can't see that then shame on them. In this case the family has just gotten bigger. My father is in a similar situation and has a sister (from another mother) my aunt that I never really knew growing up. Luckily I got to meet her before time ran short, and I am glad I did. Families are blood, but sometimes they are more. What matters is the love we have for our families. Your sister found out that her family is a little bigger, that is something to celebrate. The family she has known all her life is still her family, her father is her father as he is the one who raised her. A Parent is more than just blood, I guess what I am trying to get at is that her family should be more accepting, while it can be hard sometimes for parents to admit their faults. Things happen, and it would be terrible for her parents to pass away without some acceptance.
Your sister Heather is so brave and strong. I cannot imagine being forced to pick between family members. Including a daughter. I remain dumbfounded that your sister's family would do this, and also refuse to welcome you, Alex. You are such a loving person. My best wishes to Heather. You are lucky to have found her.
Alex, you are a great brother-protector. God bless you. Heather you are an awesome woman to have maintained your loving spirit throughout this very harsh ordeal. God will smile on you you when he one day says "Well done my child".
I listened to Heather's podcast...you are so lucky to have her in your life.She seems like a great human being.And she is lucky to have you. She loves you very much.❤❤
My heart goes out to Heather and you Alex. Heather is not at fault here and she never could be. Heather, you did absolutely nothing wrong. You are a wonderful person. I don't understand why her eldest daughter was/isn't supportive of her mother during this bitter sweet situation. I hope that they all come to their senses and see that Heather's happiness is the most important thing.
After listening to your sister's story on the podcast, I would find it impossible to think you're not related. You are so alike in character. I really hope her family opens their hearts. She shouldn't have to suffer.
I cant understand how parents can hurt their child by throwing her out of their lives. Not only are they spiteful towards her, but if they love her, aren’t they being spiteful to themselves?
I found my Mothers family from a test at 23 and me. I knew I was adopted and actually knew my mothers name, when we started the search! She has passed on, but my aunt is alive and I have connected with her. It has been a great addition to my family!!!
Y As you stated Alex, you were both children and not responsible for any of this. You are both innocent people in this. I love your message to your sister. I'm so sorry her parents are not willing to have a relationship with her. Hugs!!!
I am going through practically the same thing and I've been thinking about this all day long so it's a coincidence that you came on tonight talking about the same thing and you made me feel 100% better and like you said life doesn't last so be kind to one another and accept one another before it's too late I just like to know how old you are and how old your wife is and when your birthdays are cuz you look about my son's age and for me to think that you already lost your father is so sad
Amy- there are some really great support groups on Facebook I have found ♡ if you want the information for them- shoot me a Facebook message! Praying for you!
I listened to Heather's podcast, too. She's quite a special woman to share this struggle. She now has a warm and loving brother and "new" family to lean on.
I had a similar experience in that I found a brother that I didn’t know existed a year ago. We found each other through the ancestry site. He is 64 and I am 58. Like you I am happy to have this sibling in my life. His mother is also happy for him, my mother I’m not sure about. We talk quite a lot, spending hours on our calls, getting to know each other. He is helping get through chemo treatments. I’m happy to have my big brother in my life and am looking forward to the day we can meet in person. Thanks for sharing your life changing experience with us. Heather and her family seen to be so much fun, congrats to you all.
I'll never understand parents who stop talking to their children. It happened to me -- my mother stopped talking to me for 2 years because I asserted a simple boundary, and we were never quite the same after that -- but I adore my son and would do anything for him. I would be devastated not to have him in my life anymore. Heather is extremely brave, and I'm proud of her, too. I know how shy she's been about being on camera or speaking publicly, so to go on a podcast took a lot of courage. I wish her all the best.
I listened to her podcast and it is heartbreaking, She is such a gentle, kind woman and she never intended for this to happen, she was just helping her dad!. I hope and pray her parents come around one day soon
So sad for you all. Im shocked as a parent, that they have treated her so badly . Heather , I send you much love . Alex, you are a gent. She is lucky to have you in her life x
I am now going to take an ancestry DNA! I would be so very happy to find out I had a Brother like you! Heather, you podcast was great! I am so sorry your Mother will not tell you the truth. It’s her guilt, not yours. Hopefully she will just come clean and tell everyone the truth. You cannot lie to God. He already knows...
Alex you're an inspiration. Your willingness to share, your openness and dedication to strong values that are kind, helpful and loving mean that you're teaching your viewers by example,.. the best learning. Heather is very lucky as we all are, to share with you.
She is still his daughter! I was adopted, and my mom and dad will always and forever be my mom and dad... even if I find my birth parents, that will never change! How can he not understand that her heart won’t change?
Heather, you have such a kind wonderful family in Canada. It's sad really that the people who have spent their lives with you would treat you this way..... Breaks my heart! I will be praying for your family! Alex, God has blessed you with much wisdom. You and Melissa are such kind souls and I sure do appreciate seeing what you do for others all the time.
This is a beautiful message. My mother is in a very similar situation. She was able to meet her biological father but a few years ago after taking a DNA test through a popular online site she discovered that her "mother" was actually her grandmother. She's 77 and as she asked the younger generation to be tested to narrow down which "sister" is actually her birth mother...her family has stopped speaking to her. It's heartbreaking. She has always been a huge part of their lives. There should never be shame in being born. God bless your family.
My heart goes out to Heather. I can emphasize with her. I also have an estranged family, which I use to be real close to. However, my family estrangement is for totally different reasons. Never the less, I feel the hurt is the same. I wish all the healing for Heather, sincerely, Denis
Love your message Alex. I am 72 so I can see how her family is concerned but "don't blame the messanger" is how it should be. Thanks for your words to your sister!
Warning! You may cry watching this video!!! Touching and heartfelt love to all involved with this. It’s hard if you make it all about you, it’s easier and better if you think about the plus side to the situation. God bless you Alex and Heather! 👍🏼✝️❤️
I am in a similar situation and it sucked the life out of me.the pain, the vacuum.... But, as you said, it's their demons, their issues to sort out. May God comfort and strengthen us all. To err is human, to forgive, divine. Children are never to be punished and many of us became parents as teenagers, children ourselves. Forgiveness is key. Thank you so much, Alex, for helping your lovely sister to heal.
I hope you have found a great support system- you're right the pain does suck the life out of you ♡ if you haven't yet, I found some great secret support groups on Facebook! Feel free to Facebook message me. I'd be happy to give you the information
You are a wise and loving man. Heather can get to know her dad through you. He raised you to be this compassionate person. I hope to see more of heather with you as you get to know her better. Bless you Heather. May God fill you with love.
Her mother is so wrong to make her hurt like that. She lost a mother but got the best little brother a girl could have.
lol I’m
I agree, but you only know one side of the story....
@@susanp.7954 I say we know enough! They want to be in denial and are shunning Heather until she drops the subject. not ok.
@@susanp.7954Go away troll. Alexander and Melissa are not fools and are able to discern what the truth is without the negativity of the likes of you.
@@susanp.7954 What other side could there possibly be?
Her Mom knows the truth! I am proud of Heather!!!! She has no control over who her folks are, how can they be mad at HER? Actually says more about them than it does about her. You’re a great brother!
exactly , they are punishing her for her mothers behaviour , for him to think he was the father who is guilty ? only one person so to move the guilt from her she has passed it to the child , she has played a very clever trick on the man again because she has deflected the guilt to her daughter and yet again she is not taking responsibility for her actions
Here’s a heartfelt option for Heather, if she ever wants to fill that hole of her parents not wanting her! My wife and I would whole heartedly take her as our daughter. To love and be present in her life 200%, to be the parents she deserves. We except her unconditionally as we would except you and your family unconditionally. We live in Idaho and is a pretty close middle ground between the two of you.
Well thank you Randy 💗 you are so sweet!
Wow, Randy, that's awesome for you and your wife to so kindly offer! Blessings to you both.
WOW, How AWESOME
I am tearing up reading this. Wow! Beautiful just beautiful 😊❤️🙏🏻
No child no matter what age should ever feel unloved or unwanted! We will love them who ever you may be. 💞💞
I am an only child whose parents constantly told me in various ways that I wasn't wanted...I wish I had a brother like you come along with an open heart. I appreciate your love for your sister and commend your entire family for supporting you and her.
You are loved, from God above
How awful. I'm sorry you have that hurt. But we fans of Curiosity Inc. make up our own little family. I developed some true affection for many of the commenters, though I've never met them.
Darian, I hope you get the love you need from others who know your worth. You deserve to be here, and you deserve love.
My mom gave me up and my adopted parents were very bad people. My adopted siblings wouldn't believe what they did to me, so now I have no family.
@@tinaemery668 I'm so sorry, Tina. I hope you are able to form your own family with good friends and others around you who love you.
Well done, Alex.
Her mom lied and Heather is being punished for being born... what a shame. Heather, I am glad you guys found each other. Amazing. Parents cant lie anymore.
I did an Ancestory DNA test and discovered i had a brother and two sisters. Same father. I'm 70 and wish I'd found out years ago. They're such lovely people.
I found out when I was 17 I had a brother I didn’t know about. His mother refused my father any parental rights and married his friend instead. His name was put on the birth certificate. When my parents found out his mother had passed away, my mom reached out to him. At some point he figured out his father wasn’t his father biologically. Although my sister and I don’t really have a relationship with him, my father and he had a good relationship until my father’s passing. When my brother needed a kidney because of a heredity kidney disease, I volunteered to be tested. (His mother and his three sisters from her all carried the gene so they were not candidates.) it didn’t matter that I didn’t grow up knowing him. He was my father’s son. BTW, his wife wound up being a match, so I wasn’t needed.
I had a late Christmas present when I found out through 23andme that I had a half sister. We both always wanted a sister, and I felt alone (everyone died) and we found each other........and unlike you both sets of parents are deceased, so we didn't have the issues that Heather had. Hugs to you Heather and isn't it just wonderful Alex!!!!
Heather did nothing wrong 🤷 she has every right to be a part of your life. It's her life to live.💙
💗 you guys!!! Dang you for making me cry!
So sorry you have to go through this Heather. Breaks my heart.
What an amazing brother you have!
I’m so sorry your parents are acting this way. I am an adoptive parent. It’s not the same I know but she is my child! If she ever wants to find her bio parents I’d support her. A child cannot have too much love from parents, whether blood or not. I was also a foster parent and am still mom to many of them. I really hope they come around but that is their issue not yours. You didn’t do anything wrong. Nor do you deserve this. Surround yourself with people who love, support and encourage you. You are brave, a warrior. You should be proud of yourself. Love shouldn’t come with strings attached. Best wishes.💐
@@lollylolly8186 thank you! What a blessing you are to all those kiddos!!!
You are both awesome. I hope your parents realize change their hearts. Breaks my heart that you are going through this.
This was one of the most touching videos you have ever produced. You honoring your lost sister is very admirable and honorable of you. This brought tears to my eyes but it shows how great your character is. Your sister Heather should be very proud of you. Kudos to you Alex.😻😻😻
What he said😊❤️
Me too. I want Alex for my Brother❤
Right on. Well said. Charlie Sydnor. 🇺🇸💙😀 Very much an admirable caring man.
Ditto.
Yeah but by broadcasting this to the whole world he knows he’s making things harder for HER. Not himself. Great guy.
A beautiful yet sad story. Especially for Heather. Her Mom should be ashamed and embrace her daughter. I can imagine it was difficult for the Dad that raised her but look now he could lose her forever. I was raised by a man who wasn’t my Dad and he loved and protected me. I grew in his heart and nothing could change that. Heather I pray her parents wake up before it’s too late.
Seems to me her mom did not agree to "dating" his dad.
I was adopted at birth and was told at a early age that I was but it didn't matter to me they were and still are my mom and dad even though my dad passed away 12 years ago and today 10/29 would have been his 89th birthday! I still have my mom and I still love them both today and forever it doesn't matter if your blood I still love them!!
I have 5 daughters. My fourth daughter I met when she was only 8 months old. I married her mom, and we had another daughter. I raised her as she is my daughter. I can't ever imagine life without her!! God bless you both Alex!!!
My heart truly goes out to Heather. She has done nothing wrong. It's her mother who is in denial of her actions which brought Heather into this world. It also sounds like her mother has lied to her husband years ago. I just pray that one day Heather's parents wake up and smell the coffee!! It is their loss that they have cut her out of the family. She seems like a wonderful person. So glad she has such a wonderful brother in Alex!
I just listened to Heather's podcast. I had no idea that she was going through such heartbreak. Thank you for being such a kind, open hearted person Alex. Heather and you are blessed to have found each other.
They can't change the past, but they could embrace and love the future.
Maybe there are reasons that's not so easy for them right away. Like how old of "teenagers" were they when they were "dating", and how long were they "dating".
I would encourage everyone to listen to Heather on the NPE podcast. She shares a wealth of wisdom and love that is so inspiring.
I did and she is a helluva of lot braver and much more honest than her Mom will ever be.
Sorry I know she's still your Mom but right now she's acting like a real. Well the whole family needs to wake up because you did NOTHING WRONG HEATHER. And when they do come in asking for your forgiveness Heather and God let's all hope and Pray that they do. You just make them Wait aliitte okay ? LOL
Heather is the absolute sweetest person
I love Lily's podcast!
....Is Her Podcast on a Pay Website...????
@@hellen70666666 No, it's free. Click on the given link above.
Heather you are the star of your life....not a bit player in someone elses. Live YOUR truth.
She's a bit player in Alex's youtube broadcast to the world.
Where is the LOVE button when you want one?
Alex, your Mom and Dad and family must be so proud of you!!!
Heather, you won the lottery with this guy for a brother....wow, Alex you made me cry....and I am sure Heather and anyone else watching this....I pray, that her parents findit in their hearts to not only accept Heather back into their fold, but to also allow you Alex, and your family to join them too,
what the hell kind of mother punishes her child... when THE MOTHER WAS THE ONE WHO CREATED THIS FAMILY SECRET? Why would the non- biological father SHUN THE DAUGHTER WHO IS INNOCENT AND NOT DIRECT HIS ANGER TO HIS LYING WIFE? People are strange and Heather was obviously lucky to find an adoring, open, giving brother to lean on. Alex you and your family are good people. Heather was directed to you for a reason. I hope you can reunite with Heather soon. She deserves better from her family.
Quite a head shaker, but perhaps it is guilt or embarrassment that makes people think of themselves before innocent children. Not right, but a possible explanation.
Maybe her mom lied about it and told the ‘Dad’ he was the real father.
Sad all around
@@eileenw6002 it seems like the only logical explanation of why it turned out like this.
If that is the case mom and dad need to get over it and be ashamed of making their daughter suffer for their own decisions and the hurt and embarrassment or whatever it is. Life is short. Even if you live to be old at the end of your life it will seem like it was over as quick as the blink of an eye.
This breaks my heart for Heather. Allentown Gal I think you described it all perfectly. Heather’s parents have an opportunity to expand the family, to forgive each other, to give unconditional love as a parent, biological or not! I am shocked at her eldest daughter and sibling she grew up with!! Where is their empathy??? I am very sad indeed for Heather. What a beautiful post of support Alex. I am so glad you have each other in this. Your joy in finding your sibling is palpable. ❤️ I hope Heather finds peace in the situation. We are all here sending her our love and support in this time.
you took the words right out of my comment. well said.
from the 'dad' viewpoint i'd be pretty pissed if my partner knew our child may be somebody else's but I sure as hell wouldn't be cross with the kid i raised as my own. how dare you not be my bio child, like it's their fault..
well, karma will get them as they are now being slagged off on social media by total strangers across the world~
. it's what they deserve
Thanks Alex for sharing. I went through this when I discovered two half sisters and invited them into my life. I lost my mother and a number of relatives. My sisters belong to our dad. I’m sorry Heather is going through this.
Some people are just so unbending and there is no changing them. Heather is a strong woman. I love that you get to know each other and learn from each other for the rest of your lives. It is tragic, and yet at the same time empowering knowing Heather has a whole new family.❤️🌺
Thanks so much for doing this episode. I am a genealogist who is working with someone who just found her biological father (deaceased) through DNA testing and a new sister, having been raised adopted but an only child. Her sister is thrilled but her adoptive mom is giving her grief. Heather's NPE broadcast and DNA Gone Wrong sites will be so helpful. Please thank Heather for me.
I know of some really great resources if she's interested ♡
Alex, I wish you were my brother. What a loving and supportive vlog. Sending you and Heather the best. I also believe her parents will one day come around, after their shock and embarrassment has worn off.
Me too. I’d be hanging out on picking trips with him!
Unfortunately, Heather is the victim of her mother's inability to forgive herself for being human, she made a mistake. Years ago, having a baby out of wedlock was not as acceptable as it is today. She married without sharing with her husband the fact that she was pregnant by another man. So she lied thinking that the truth would remain buried. Heather was not a mistake, she is a gift from God, and it's sad that her parents are blaming her for trying to do a good thing for the father who raised her. Shutting her out of their lives is their lose. God, in His infinite wisdom, gave you each other to love, support, and accept each other. You are a good, loving "little" brother for your big sister, and she is a good "big" sister for you. I pray that having each other will continue to bless you, and that the love you share will continue to blossom. Peace to you both, be easy with yourselves.🤗
Amen !! I hope that if they are Christian people a pastor can speak to them about forgiveness ... their marriage needs it desperately , once they learn forgiveness they can apologize to their innocent daughter ..
Well said.
I wouldn't expect anything less from you and your family,you are a class act!
Cheers,
Rik Spector
How could a mother choose to disown her own daughter? ...shame on Heather's mom! Heather you are so lucky to have found your brother...he's one in a million!
Hearing you don’t share DNA doesn’t change who your parents are 🤷♀️ I don’t understand how her parents are behaving this way to their own child. It is your child. Love is love. I found out at 13 that my dad, the man that raised me from 2, wasn’t my blood father....it didn’t make my heart change. The man who helped create me obviously didn’t care enough to hang around or fight for me, maybe didn’t know I was around....but my dad was my dad and he said and felt the same way. He actually didn’t want me to know the truth because he was afraid I’d think he loved me less then my “half” sister. Life is short. Love is love. Blood isn’t thicker then love. To alienate Heather is sad and senseless honestly. It is unacceptable. You said it so well.
I found out when I was 58! Yes, they lied to me for 58 years! Yet in a way, I really didn't care. My dad was the best dad he could be. He married my mom when she was pregnant in the 50's and they were friends. It was one of the ways people dealt with unexpected pregnancies back then. It still doesn't seem real in a way, but DNA, you know? I agree with everything you said.
@BrandyRust What a lovely comment, Brandy.. brought a tear to my eye 🤗
I absolutely agree ♡
You said it so well !! Agree.
@@aksez2u I actually said the same thing in my own 13 year old way....shrugged and said so? Now as a middle age woman with kids I understand the emotion of it then i didn’t. But the day they told me, my dad took just me out to lunch, gave me long speeches about how he loved me no matter what, in my child mind I thought I was being prepared for my parent to tell me they were getting divorced🤷♀️ so I think after all that when they sat me down together and explained my mom got pregnant with me at 15!!! And then met, fell in love with me dad and actually married him several years later and he wasn’t actually my biological father....well to me it didn’t change much long as nothing in my home was changing. It did eventually explain a lot of differences between my sister and I and I’m glad of course to know but it still didn’t change my heart. Your Dad is the one who worries when you go out on a date, teaches you to ride a bike, freaked out 1st time he tried to teach me to drive, etc. that’s ya dad. 💜💜💜 Sorry you found out so late in life but as you said it really doesn’t change much.
Alex, your such a great brother. Heather is really lucky.
What a wonderfully kind and loving message to your beautiful sister. Well said, Alex.
Good for you; your sister is lucky to have a brother like you. I agree with your sentiments completely...if I ever found out that my daughter wasn't my biological daughter, my love for her wouldn't be diminished one bit. How could a father possible react that way?!
Could be they had an issue with Alex's dad for some reason. We don't know the full story.
@@jackfntwist You are a major troll and harassing Heather and Alex. You have been reported.
@@MsRedsphere I am just trying to have a discussion with an objective perspective. Nobody deserves to be publicly bashed without us knowing both sides of the story (or at all, really). We don't know what or why happened from both sides. Sorry if you prefer to publicly bash strangers, including me.
Beautiful message, Alex, and you are so right. Life is short-too short to let anger lead the way. Glad you & Heather decided to open your hearts and welcome one another with open arms. Wishing you and your families all the best. Happy 18 month anniversary to your siblinghood!
Your 100% right! Neither of you had the choice, the adults did! Be strong, both of you!
Alex, very loving brave statement, Heather, he's yours for life, best you get used to having a brat of a brother! 🤣❤
HaHAHA. Alex is more rascal than brat.
"I smile because you're my brother.
I laugh because there's nothing you can do about it!" 🤣🤣
(Can be said about sisters, too!)
Been there Alex. I have shared my story with Heather and how people of her mother's (and my mother's) generation rate social status and family secrets over the welfare of others. My mother has only just admitted at 80 years old how badly she treated me and my brother (we supposedly have the same father) because she was afraid of what people thought. Ironically, they ALL knew but never let on that they knew. Thank you for your support of Heather. You just went up another notch on my Alex meter. LOL
Yes, she is doing the right thing.
My eyes are filled with tears but I'm also emotional about the pureness of a brother's love! Prayers for you all!!💜
Sooooooo. It’s heathers fault her mother got pregnant? The mum needs to wake up to herself. Stay strong!
She probably feels embarassed that her husband found out her secret. I wished they'd take it as water under the bridge and move ahead to a happier future.
She probably denied it to her husband in the first days of panic and now she has to double and triple down on that lie. That's for her to sort out since she decided to deceive her husband back then. I mean I can imagine how hurtful that must be for the guy so he'd rather believe this is all one big lie. Very sad and disgraceful on Heather's mother's side.
@@phangirlable It may be possible mom didn't know for sure if she was pregnant before she got with her current husband but the response towards Heather of the news is not understandable to me from either parent.
@@karenmilligan5597 It doesn't much about her morals if she broke up with Alex's father and hooked up with another guy soon enough to have a "premature" baby and worse that after 30+ years still lying about it and blaming Heather. Lies have a way of turning around and biting you in the rear and usually it's the innocent that pays the price.
Here’s to Alex and Heather! 🥂 May your family ties grow ever stronger!
Your child is always your child, by love or by blood. I'm in tears.
I have a blended, crazy family. I call my siblings Brother and Sister no matter if they are full, half, step. We have each other forever. We belong together, despite the flaws of our parents; we are innocent and love each other. I do not understand how a true parent can guilt their children for the actions of the parent. Why? It is so wrong to do that. I would have totally loved to be born into the perfect family. I wasnt. So I make the best of what I do have. You are sister and brother. Love, support and be there for each other as you do. You are doing the right thing.
Heather, you have the best brother in the world. 💜
Until my last day, I will never understand some people. Life is so incredibly short. Sometimes when others burn bridges and hurt you immensely, you gain more in the long run. Nobody needs that in their lives. And Alex, what a wonderful, truly sweet thing to do for your sister.
I know what you guys are going through. I was given away at the of 40 days old. Never knew my dad my mom I meet her when I was 21yrs old. Saw her twice and then she passed. To your sister tell her she not alone . The pain runs deep. Wishing you and your sister and family the best .
Praying for you 💗
What an absolutely despicable way to treat your own daughter (blood or not), mom, sister! It was very hard to listen to the podcast without wanting to cry... Heather, this is not your fault and it certainly isn’t your fault the way your family has shunned you. They are the ones causing you pain! I pray that God gives you strength, love, happiness and grace for your family (it would be hard for me)! I’m so very happy that you two found each other after all these years. It truly is a blessing! Alex I absolutely adore you for the support you give your sister and the upstanding young man you are! May God continue to bless you and your family! ♥️♥️♥️
The affirmation of love, for your beautiful Sister Heather, is apparent through not only your words but the emotions you radiate, as you speak of her, her journey & your relationship. You are both So BLESSED to have found one another.
I was found by a son I didn't know about. It's been fantastic getting to know him.
You just keep being that good little brother.
I cannot imagine how she must feel. I can't imagine my family turning their backs on me. Thank you Alex for standing with her and helping her through such a difficult time. It shows just how much you care for her.
That's a brother standing up for his sister.
I just listened to Heather’s podcast. It is excellent, as she is so articulate, authentic, and seems to be at peace with a situation over which she had no control! She is clearly such a kind and loving person. You two are so fortunate to have found each other.
I'm going to pray for her Mom and dad 🙏🙏🙏💔😢
One day they will understand and have to come to grips with THEIR choices, JUST LIKE THE REST OF US!
Heather, I'm glad you have a brother like Alex!!
I wish more people looked at it this way. Hopefully, on day her family will accept that you're just a bonus bit of family.
I'm sure her cruel family are the 33 people who clicked thumbs down. Stay strong Heather, you are incredible. It's their lost.
Alex, that was wonderful. Love that you put your heart out there. So sorry that Heather's mom and dad can't be more loving toward her. The man who raised her is her dad. She may have a different father, and he would have loved her too But that original bond between her and her dad that raised her is very important. That love is what is needed in this world. You are so loving, Alex. I'm glad you found each other.
DNA never lies, like dead man's bones tell no lies. Heather is truly loved and wanted. I love you Heather.
Good on you for sticking up for your sister - that's a really awesome brother thing to do!
This world needs more beautiful people like you Alex...
It is such a shame that Heather had to go through such a tough time. The man who raised her may not have been her biological father but he is her DAD. Now he doesn't have a daughter & that is a choice that he & his wife have made. Heathers birth had nothing to do with her but alot to do with her mother not being honest. Heather has gained an awesome brother, sister in law & niece & nephews. I'm glad you found each other. Much love & respect to you all xxx
A family's supposed to support each other, whether you agree with their choices or not. It's that simple. As long as they're not hurting themselves or anyone else, you let them BE themselves whether you agree with it or not. Well done, Alex.
This is a wonderful video! I agree with Alex and what he thinks about this situation. I'm proud of both of you. Heather, it was a wonderful thing you did by seeking the truth. All of this happened so long ago that people should forgive. I'm also happy you two are close.
Around the same time as you I found out that I also had a sister I also took the chance to get to my sister Kathy it was the best thing I done in my life Alex stand tall Heather and you did nothing wrong
A Father is someone who is more than just conceived a child, they are a person who looks after you, and helps you grow up. Her father is always going to be just that. If her mother and father can't see that then shame on them. In this case the family has just gotten bigger. My father is in a similar situation and has a sister (from another mother) my aunt that I never really knew growing up. Luckily I got to meet her before time ran short, and I am glad I did. Families are blood, but sometimes they are more. What matters is the love we have for our families. Your sister found out that her family is a little bigger, that is something to celebrate. The family she has known all her life is still her family, her father is her father as he is the one who raised her. A Parent is more than just blood, I guess what I am trying to get at is that her family should be more accepting, while it can be hard sometimes for parents to admit their faults. Things happen, and it would be terrible for her parents to pass away without some acceptance.
Your sister Heather is so brave and strong. I cannot imagine being forced to pick between family members. Including a daughter. I remain dumbfounded that your sister's family would do this, and also refuse to welcome you, Alex. You are such a loving person. My best wishes to Heather. You are lucky to have found her.
Alex, you are a great brother-protector. God bless you. Heather you are an awesome woman to have maintained your loving spirit throughout this very harsh ordeal. God will smile on you you when he one day says "Well done my child".
Looking forward to that day 🥰 Best day ever!
@@olearyfam4 I'll see you there. :)
I listened to Heather's podcast...you are so lucky to have her in your life.She seems like a great human being.And she is lucky to have you. She loves you very much.❤❤
My heart goes out to Heather and you Alex. Heather is not at fault here and she never could be. Heather, you did absolutely nothing wrong. You are a wonderful person. I don't understand why her eldest daughter was/isn't supportive of her mother during this bitter sweet situation. I hope that they all come to their senses and see that Heather's happiness is the most important thing.
I remember when you took Heather to you new shop and she said how proud she was of you. Now you say it in return. Beautiful.
After listening to your sister's story on the podcast, I would find it impossible to think you're not related. You are so alike in character. I really hope her family opens their hearts. She shouldn't have to suffer.
I cant understand how parents can hurt their child by throwing her out of their lives. Not only are they spiteful towards her, but if they love her, aren’t they being spiteful to themselves?
I found my Mothers family from a test at 23 and me. I knew I was adopted and actually knew my mothers name, when we started the search! She has passed on, but my aunt is alive and I have connected with her. It has been a great addition to my family!!!
You and Heather are so inspiring!
The buck stops with Heather’s mother, she should do better. What a lovely brother you are. So kind and loving.
Denial breaks families apart. It’s happening with my family. You can’t fix it if the other side won’t cooperate. Much love!!
So much truth! You can't fix anything if both parties are not all in 💗
Y
As you stated Alex, you were both children and not responsible for any of this. You are both innocent people in this. I love your message to your sister. I'm so sorry her parents are not willing to have a relationship with her. Hugs!!!
I am going through practically the same thing and I've been thinking about this all day long so it's a coincidence that you came on tonight talking about the same thing and you made me feel 100% better and like you said life doesn't last so be kind to one another and accept one another before it's too late I just like to know how old you are and how old your wife is and when your birthdays are cuz you look about my son's age and for me to think that you already lost your father is so sad
Alex is... 40? A bit older maybe. Melissa is in her late 30s, about 3 or 4 years younger.
Amy- there are some really great support groups on Facebook I have found ♡ if you want the information for them- shoot me a Facebook message! Praying for you!
I listened to Heather's podcast, too. She's quite a special woman to share this struggle. She now has a warm and loving brother and "new" family to lean on.
I had a similar experience in that I found a brother that I didn’t know existed a year ago. We found each other through the ancestry site. He is 64 and I am 58. Like you I am happy to have this sibling in my life. His mother is also happy for him, my mother I’m not sure about. We talk quite a lot, spending hours on our calls, getting to know each other. He is helping get through chemo treatments. I’m happy to have my big brother in my life and am looking forward to the day we can meet in person. Thanks for sharing your life changing experience with us. Heather and her family seen to be so much fun, congrats to you all.
I'll never understand parents who stop talking to their children. It happened to me -- my mother stopped talking to me for 2 years because I asserted a simple boundary, and we were never quite the same after that -- but I adore my son and would do anything for him. I would be devastated not to have him in my life anymore. Heather is extremely brave, and I'm proud of her, too. I know how shy she's been about being on camera or speaking publicly, so to go on a podcast took a lot of courage. I wish her all the best.
You would have to know both sides of a story before you could judge.
Alex - nothing but love for you and your family. Heck- I'll adopt you all.
My love to my Daughter is unconditional.
I listened to her podcast and it is heartbreaking, She is such a gentle, kind woman and she never intended for this to happen, she was just helping her dad!. I hope and pray her parents come around one day soon
So sad for you all. Im shocked as a parent, that they have treated her so badly . Heather , I send you much love . Alex, you are a gent. She is lucky to have you in her life x
I am now going to take an ancestry DNA! I would be so very happy to find out I had a Brother like you! Heather, you podcast was great! I am so sorry your Mother will not tell you the truth. It’s her guilt, not yours. Hopefully she will just come clean and tell everyone the truth. You cannot lie to God. He already knows...
Every time I'm completely discourage by humanity you make things a little better.
Alex you're an inspiration. Your willingness to share, your openness and dedication to strong values that are kind, helpful and loving mean that you're teaching your viewers by example,.. the best learning. Heather is very lucky as we all are, to share with you.
She is still his daughter! I was adopted, and my mom and dad will always and forever be my mom and dad... even if I find my birth parents, that will never change! How can he not understand that her heart won’t change?
Heather, you have such a kind wonderful family in Canada. It's sad really that the people who have spent their lives with you would treat you this way..... Breaks my heart! I will be praying for your family!
Alex, God has blessed you with much wisdom. You and Melissa are such kind souls and I sure do appreciate seeing what you do for others all the time.
This is a beautiful message. My mother is in a very similar situation. She was able to meet her biological father but a few years ago after taking a DNA test through a popular online site she discovered that her "mother" was actually her grandmother. She's 77 and as she asked the younger generation to be tested to narrow down which "sister" is actually her birth mother...her family has stopped speaking to her. It's heartbreaking. She has always been a huge part of their lives. There should never be shame in being born. God bless your family.
My heart goes out to Heather. I can emphasize with her. I also have an estranged family, which I use to be real close to. However, my family estrangement is for totally different reasons. Never the less, I feel the hurt is the same. I wish all the healing for Heather, sincerely, Denis
Love your message Alex. I am 72 so I can see how her family is concerned but "don't blame the messanger" is how it should be. Thanks for your words to your sister!
Warning! You may cry watching this video!!! Touching and heartfelt love to all involved with this. It’s hard if you make it all about you, it’s easier and better if you think about the plus side to the situation. God bless you Alex and Heather! 👍🏼✝️❤️
Nothing is more important than family.
The way Heather's family are behaving makes me want to cry! They are the ones in the wrong. Its so sad.
I’m convinced your dad, once passed, helped your sister find you! What a very sweet and sad story.
I am in a similar situation and it sucked the life out of me.the pain, the vacuum.... But, as you said, it's their demons, their issues to sort out. May God comfort and strengthen us all. To err is human, to forgive, divine. Children are never to be punished and many of us became parents as teenagers, children ourselves. Forgiveness is key. Thank you so much, Alex, for helping your lovely sister to heal.
I hope you have found a great support system- you're right the pain does suck the life out of you ♡ if you haven't yet, I found some great secret support groups on Facebook! Feel free to Facebook message me. I'd be happy to give you the information
I think you're speaking for your Dad whose no doubt very proud of both you and your sister.
You are a wise and loving man. Heather can get to know her dad through you. He raised you to be this compassionate person. I hope to see more of heather with you as you get to know her better. Bless you Heather. May God fill you with love.
You and your family are who we should all strive to be. You are one of the truly good people.
Just listened to Heather’s podcast and she’s amazing!!
Well said Alex! And Heather if you get to see this, you are a lucky person to have Alex in your like, your brother.
💗