So glad it was a great experience Casey. One word you failed to mention for others coming out is that they feel SAFE. Not in the sense of being scared, but in the sense of not being physically harmed or kicked out of the house. Thanks.
Im so happy your experience was positive and helped you grow! *EVERYONE SHOULD SPREAD LOVE* :] I told my mom on a trip back from college... i talk about it more in a video BUT needles to say there were a lot of tears and emotions. It was a huge weight off my chest and I have never looked back!
Congratulations Casey on your courage! I'm much older than you and still have 1 foot in the closet. it's so much easier in this day and age to come out, as opposed to a few decades ago. Certain entities back then could fire you from your job if they found out you're Gay, but those days are history. Straight family and friends are definitely more accepting in 2021 compared to the 1960s for example. People were more apt to gossip with ill will back then than now. Casey, you're give great inspiration. :)
I spent a long time worrying about the fallout and who would be effected by me coming out. When I finally realized that the only thing I had control over was my own happiness, then things started falling into place. My family were all like, "Duh, we just wondered when you were going to tell us" and most of my friends were not surprised. So I spent a lot of time and energy worrying about nothing basically. I know it's different for everyone, but it's still hard and you have to do it when you are ready and not when others think you should. Thanks for sharing your story Casey!
I’m so glad you had a good experience. I came out in January of this year. I had told my mom before she passed but waited to tell the rest of my family. The main reason I hesitated was my father. I knew he wouldn’t approve but I was tired of not being myself. So, in January, I came out. Everyone from my moms side of the family were completely okay with it. My father; however, wasn’t okay. He told me “if you’re going to choose this, I’m out.” So, I haven’t spoken to him since January. But, I am so much happier now. It was the best decision of my life. Now, I need to find that amazing guy like you found Kyle. You may have but I just don’t remember... but have you done a video on how you went about meeting Kyle? I would love tips bc Tinder and Grindr aren’t working, lol. Have a good day man.
I can speak from personal experience, most family members who are hateful at first do eventually come around. It’s hard for some people to accept, and even though I find rejecting family for this reason abhorrent, forgiveness and acceptance are still possible! And if they don’t ever come around, you are honestly better off without that person in your life. Best of luck to you.
My worst experience was being sent to conversion therapy. It's a messed up thing. And I'm so glad it's not really a thing anymore. I'm glad your experience was good. And in my opinion, you don't just "come out" once in your life, you will constantly be coming out to people who you meet, making new friends, etc.
I told my parents over the phone when I was back in college. I had intended to just tell my mom so that I would have backing and the courage to tell my dad but then while on the phone he entered the room my mom was in and found out that way. That was nice to just get done with it all in one day, even if I do wish (and them too) that I told them in person. I was also so shocked by how little they truly cared about it because when you are in the closet you are so afraid of little things from childhood and I feel like I blew these little things up in my head that really weren't meant to be taken the way I did.
I also told my parents over the phone, because I'd just moved frm Chgo to Ft Lauderdale at 24 & began dating a guy I met at 1 of out major gay nightclubs here, when my folks called 2 say they'd be stopping by to visit on their way to a business trip in the FL Keys. My bf was living w/me in my 1/1 4-plex on A1A/Ocean Dr, so I had to tell them about my signif other, but I had to correct their joking around on the phone when 1 of them said, "oh ur seeing someone, what's HIS name...j/k? I responded, HIS name is Kevin & I'm not joking! Silence from both of them, since dad jokingly asked saying HIM & mom said corrected him by saying HER. What a surprise it was when dads joke was correct. They seemed 2 take it well by phone, but gradually got worse over the decade as they retired, relocated & got into a new catholic church, ugg.
So glad that many younger people have an easy time coming out. Wasn't always the case, but fortunately society has come around thanks to earlier generations. And parents - if you already know it, SAY something, don't leave your kids guessing and stressed out. At least be clear that you're fine with gay people so they feel ok about telling you.
I came out to my parents because I was tired of hiding, de-gaying the house before they visited, because I wanted them to know the real me rather than find out after something happened to me. Turned out they were both there for me and accepted my boyfriend, now my husband, just as they did my siblings partners. They were our best silent supporters, doing things, standing up for us, in ways that we only found out after the fact.
I am a 63 year old man. I knew i was gay at 14. Didnt tell anyone due to living in small texas town and back in the 70s you could not be gay was not accepted at all. End up getting married and having 3 girls. Been married for 40 years. I have had enough of hiding and being in the closet. Right now my biggest fear is what are my daughters going to say and do. Will they disown me and want nothing to do with me. That is scaring me the most. Have already told wife abd thst did n9t go well at all just as i had expected but i am not going back in the closet would rather be dead. Will be telling daughters soon and getting divorce papers drawn up. I have a therapist who is really helping me deal with my issues. Do you have and advice
My coming out was in 9th grade I was 15 then I planned it so long. My parents are Christians. Very religious. My grandma and granddad are from a different time you know. They grew up during WW2 (I am from Austria, and at this time Austria belonged to Germany), it’s just so that they grew up with veeeery different values. And my other grandma grew up in Italy at the same time, and she also has very different values from her childhood, so I just don’t tell them, because they are old and will die soon (sad but true), so why bother them. However I felt a need to come out to my parents and I really was scared a lot. I had a friend at mine, for a sleepover and she is from Russia. She wrote a letter in Russian for me, with the things I told her in German. And then we wrote "Scan this into google translate" and my friend had to take the letter in front of their room‘s door when they were sleeping, because I knew I couldn’t do that. On the next day they were kinda angry that I didn’t tell them that when they asked me if I was good, or have any fears or issues. Some parts of my extended family know, and they also all accepted it... And in High School (fi de Österreicher BORG) everyone accepted me. (except one girl that hated me and told me I should die and so on...) But this didn’t affect me, because it’s one person. And it’s one you just can’t take seriously. And then when I told her, I saw her drinking alcohol during Ramadan, it continued like before and we went outside in front of school smoking cigarettes together when we skipped lessons haha 😂
Here may this wisdoms leads you to a better life:- "See the world not as it is, but as it should be." "Religion is about *PEACE* and *MERCY* of God." "When you get to God, He will never judge you based on your sexuality. He will judges and look at you, by what type of a person you are." "God loves us beyond any and everything else, and that’s who we should love first." "You're entitled to love whoever you want to, the way that you want to, without the judgement of anyone else." "And in the sight of God, kindness and love are the highest priority."
I expect things to change, I dont want to hear 'nothing'. Parents/family shouldn't drop typical questions, like, "so are you seeing anyone lately?" It seems the gay topic, once shared, stops family from treating you the same way as when you were presumed str8. Absence of discussion is NOT a successful Coming Out, its a failure by your family. I'm gonna explode if I hear 1 more gay boy say, "well my P's accept me, just not my being gay (or my lifestyle)". Guys, your gayness & lifestyle IS YOUR identity. If parents dont accept the way their/our God made you 2 be attracted to other guys, it means they ARE NOT accepting you, moreover, they're homophobic. Just because they dont beat you up / toss you out the house doesn't mean they accept you for being you. God made us, many families love church, but shouldn't go, b/c they're pissing off God & hurting you with their actions of INACTION! They don't need to march at Pride, but they should get to know & hear about the special dates or guy(s) in your life, just like they do with your bro & sis. That's true acceptance!!
@ massimo - are you joking? There is no more 'cause' of homosexuality than there's a 'cause' of heterosexuality. It's just a normal variation of humanity (like maybe height or intelligence) that some people choose to make a big deal over.
In your gay/curious life is there anything you wish you could change do over or never do again!!! I have found I have not yet came to terms even though I am out.
Congratulations for the acceptance not everyone gets that. Two issues: please look into the camera and not at the display lens and how old were you when you came out you did not mention it in this video.
So glad it was a great experience Casey. One word you failed to mention for others coming out is that they feel SAFE. Not in the sense of being scared, but in the sense of not being physically harmed or kicked out of the house. Thanks.
Im so happy your experience was positive and helped you grow! *EVERYONE SHOULD SPREAD LOVE* :]
I told my mom on a trip back from college... i talk about it more in a video BUT needles to say there were a lot of tears and emotions. It was a huge weight off my chest and I have never looked back!
Congratulations Casey on your courage! I'm much older than you and still have 1 foot in the closet. it's so much easier in this day and age to come out, as opposed to a few decades ago. Certain entities back then could fire you from your job if they found out you're Gay, but those days are history. Straight family and friends are definitely more accepting in 2021 compared to the 1960s for example. People were more apt to gossip with ill will back then than now. Casey, you're give great inspiration. :)
I spent a long time worrying about the fallout and who would be effected by me coming out. When I finally realized that the only thing I had control over was my own happiness, then things started falling into place. My family were all like, "Duh, we just wondered when you were going to tell us" and most of my friends were not surprised. So I spent a lot of time and energy worrying about nothing basically. I know it's different for everyone, but it's still hard and you have to do it when you are ready and not when others think you should. Thanks for sharing your story Casey!
I’m so glad you had a good experience. I came out in January of this year.
I had told my mom before she passed but waited to tell the rest of my family.
The main reason I hesitated was my father. I knew he wouldn’t approve but I was tired of not being myself. So, in January, I came out. Everyone from my moms side of the family were completely okay with it. My father; however, wasn’t okay. He told me “if you’re going to choose this, I’m out.”
So, I haven’t spoken to him since January.
But, I am so much happier now. It was the best decision of my life.
Now, I need to find that amazing guy like you found Kyle.
You may have but I just don’t remember... but have you done a video on how you went about meeting Kyle?
I would love tips bc Tinder and Grindr aren’t working, lol.
Have a good day man.
Sorry to here about your mother's passing. Give your father time. It took my father about 2 yrs to get used to it. Now we get along better then ever.
I can speak from personal experience, most family members who are hateful at first do eventually come around. It’s hard for some people to accept, and even though I find rejecting family for this reason abhorrent, forgiveness and acceptance are still possible! And if they don’t ever come around, you are honestly better off without that person in your life. Best of luck to you.
Stephen thank you so much.
Casey so proud of you your family are great all ways be your self no matter what be happy
My worst experience was being sent to conversion therapy. It's a messed up thing. And I'm so glad it's not really a thing anymore. I'm glad your experience was good. And in my opinion, you don't just "come out" once in your life, you will constantly be coming out to people who you meet, making new friends, etc.
I told my parents over the phone when I was back in college. I had intended to just tell my mom so that I would have backing and the courage to tell my dad but then while on the phone he entered the room my mom was in and found out that way. That was nice to just get done with it all in one day, even if I do wish (and them too) that I told them in person. I was also so shocked by how little they truly cared about it because when you are in the closet you are so afraid of little things from childhood and I feel like I blew these little things up in my head that really weren't meant to be taken the way I did.
I also told my parents over the phone, because I'd just moved frm Chgo to Ft Lauderdale at 24 & began dating a guy I met at 1 of out major gay nightclubs here, when my folks called 2 say they'd be stopping by to visit on their way to a business trip in the FL Keys. My bf was living w/me in my 1/1 4-plex on A1A/Ocean Dr, so I had to tell them about my signif other, but I had to correct their joking around on the phone when 1 of them said, "oh ur seeing someone, what's HIS name...j/k? I responded, HIS name is Kevin & I'm not joking! Silence from both of them, since dad jokingly asked saying HIM & mom said corrected him by saying HER. What a surprise it was when dads joke was correct. They seemed 2 take it well by phone, but gradually got worse over the decade as they retired, relocated & got into a new catholic church, ugg.
So glad that many younger people have an easy time coming out. Wasn't always the case, but fortunately society has come around thanks to earlier generations. And parents - if you already know it, SAY something, don't leave your kids guessing and stressed out. At least be clear that you're fine with gay people so they feel ok about telling you.
This is not The Truth; it is your truth.
I came out to my parents because I was tired of hiding, de-gaying the house before they visited, because I wanted them to know the real me rather than find out after something happened to me. Turned out they were both there for me and accepted my boyfriend, now my husband, just as they did my siblings partners. They were our best silent supporters, doing things, standing up for us, in ways that we only found out after the fact.
I'm happy your entire family accepts you. And you're married now- congratulations! You're very attractive! Nice lips!
I wanted to wait until my son graduated so he would have his mom and dad together until then.
I am a 63 year old man. I knew i was gay at 14. Didnt tell anyone due to living in small texas town and back in the 70s you could not be gay was not accepted at all. End up getting married and having 3 girls. Been married for 40 years. I have had enough of hiding and being in the closet. Right now my biggest fear is what are my daughters going to say and do. Will they disown me and want nothing to do with me. That is scaring me the most. Have already told wife abd thst did n9t go well at all just as i had expected but i am not going back in the closet would rather be dead. Will be telling daughters soon and getting divorce papers drawn up. I have a therapist who is really helping me deal with my issues.
Do you have and advice
My coming out was in 9th grade
I was 15 then
I planned it so long. My parents are Christians. Very religious.
My grandma and granddad are from a different time you know. They grew up during WW2 (I am from Austria, and at this time Austria belonged to Germany), it’s just so that they grew up with veeeery different values. And my other grandma grew up in Italy at the same time, and she also has very different values from her childhood, so I just don’t tell them, because they are old and will die soon (sad but true), so why bother them.
However I felt a need to come out to my parents and I really was scared a lot. I had a friend at mine, for a sleepover and she is from Russia. She wrote a letter in Russian for me, with the things I told her in German. And then we wrote "Scan this into google translate" and my friend had to take the letter in front of their room‘s door when they were sleeping, because I knew I couldn’t do that.
On the next day they were kinda angry that I didn’t tell them that when they asked me if I was good, or have any fears or issues. Some parts of my extended family know, and they also all accepted it...
And in High School (fi de Österreicher BORG) everyone accepted me. (except one girl that hated me and told me I should die and so on...) But this didn’t affect me, because it’s one person. And it’s one you just can’t take seriously. And then when I told her, I saw her drinking alcohol during Ramadan, it continued like before and we went outside in front of school smoking cigarettes together when we skipped lessons haha 😂
Here may this wisdoms leads you to a better life:-
"See the world not as it is, but as it should be."
"Religion is about *PEACE* and *MERCY* of God."
"When you get to God, He will never judge you based on your sexuality. He will judges and look at you, by what type of a person you are."
"God loves us beyond any and everything else, and that’s who we should love first."
"You're entitled to love whoever you want to, the way that you want to, without the judgement of anyone else."
"And in the sight of God, kindness and love are the highest priority."
I expect things to change, I dont want to hear 'nothing'. Parents/family shouldn't drop typical questions, like, "so are you seeing anyone lately?" It seems the gay topic, once shared, stops family from treating you the same way as when you were presumed str8. Absence of discussion is NOT a successful Coming Out, its a failure by your family. I'm gonna explode if I hear 1 more gay boy say, "well my P's accept me, just not my being gay (or my lifestyle)". Guys, your gayness & lifestyle IS YOUR identity. If parents dont accept the way their/our God made you 2 be attracted to other guys, it means they ARE NOT accepting you, moreover, they're homophobic. Just because they dont beat you up / toss you out the house doesn't mean they accept you for being you. God made us, many families love church, but shouldn't go, b/c they're pissing off God & hurting you with their actions of INACTION! They don't need to march at Pride, but they should get to know & hear about the special dates or guy(s) in your life, just like they do with your bro & sis. That's true acceptance!!
Amen
You loook so good..
I like you so much!!
Can i add you on your social media accounts?
hello, do you think that witnessed violence in the family could be the cause of homosexuality?
@ massimo - are you joking? There is no more 'cause' of homosexuality than there's a 'cause' of heterosexuality. It's just a normal variation of humanity (like maybe height or intelligence) that some people choose to make a big deal over.
In your gay/curious life is there anything you wish you could change do over or never do again!!! I have found I have not yet came to terms even though I am out.
I've always found you very attractive and Kyle is lucky to have you!¡
What's your social media?
Congratulations for the acceptance not everyone gets that. Two issues: please look into the camera and not at the display lens and how old were you when you came out you did not mention it in this video.
Why don't you share some wedding photos with us. That would be great.
Family and being alone
This isn't the truth for everyone.
Its just how it went for you.