is your family ruining your mental health?

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 93

  • @Sisyphus55
    @Sisyphus55  4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +6

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  • @Julliettwarner
    @Julliettwarner 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +41

    This is exactly my relationship with my family. Being the youngest i have been infantilised all my life even now they never let me take a decision on my own i hate it so much but they literally will destroy my life if i don’t do exactly what they want. Moving out in 15 days and i could not be happier.

    • @Biocube101
      @Biocube101 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

      good luck

  • @AkandeSTAR
    @AkandeSTAR 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +45

    This is really what I needed to see right now, after literally having to see my entire family bloodline fall apart.
    All I have is my youngest sisters, and their mom. And I need to stay strong and give them the happiness they deserve. I need to respect their growth.
    I will be okay, we will all be okay. We will find a way to enjoy the holidays together. Merry Christmas guys. I love all of you.

    • @Sisyphus55
      @Sisyphus55  4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +7

      Sorry to hear that :/ stay strong!

    • @julia13130
      @julia13130 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@AkandeSTAR I’m sorry your biological family isn’t what you need, I hope you are able to rely on some chosen family members!!

  • @Saorou
    @Saorou 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +35

    damn, perfect timing

  • @ZealousWins
    @ZealousWins 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +60

    I deal with some mental illness/disorder in my family, and it's a struggle, to say the least, to live with it daily the way my family and I do. I feel that my parents and siblings need more help than they're currently getting, but if you have one parent who's arrogant and doesn't think we need help, and the other one has just given up on life and sits around all day doing nothing productive, then what is one to do in such an environment?

    • @raiylab
      @raiylab 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +9

      Potentially we can escape this environment we’re trapped in, if not tomorrow, eventually. I’m feeling the urge to move out grow stronger and stronger, and I believe I should act on it. I cannot control my mother’s behaviors, and my father is currently out of my life by my choice. I only have this life, so I’m going to start advocating for my own independence and health. I can be successful and love myself, and I won’t let parents be a drain for my soul and potential. Whatever situation you’re in, I have faith that a path to a healthy environment will reveal itself to you in time, and you’ll grow into that which you strive to be. Happy holidays my brother

    • @ryanfinnamore1309
      @ryanfinnamore1309 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

      @@raiylab You’re doing great bro keep it up

    • @fitzwits
      @fitzwits ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

      My favorite quote for this question of "what is one too do?" Is from the boondocks. Huey asks his grandfather "What do you do when you can't do nothing, but there's nothing you can do?"
      His grandfather responded with
      "You do what you can."
      It will still make me smile to this day.

  • @fatjawns3671
    @fatjawns3671 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +17

    Yes
    I have a small family already and on top of that either mental illness or addiction+mental illness on one side. The lack of drive and lack of self awareness that I have to go through day in and day out, and the shitty parts of their personalities I’m absorbing through sheer osmosis is quite literally suffocating me.
    I would go in the military, but that’s after I finish my graduate degree in 2 years. Life sucks rn man, especially considering I have a couple family members that aren’t insufferable to be around are thousands of miles away.

  • @Heronymus.OmDraco
    @Heronymus.OmDraco 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +13

    How timely.
    I just moved to my father's property after losing my mother last year, because he's the only family I've really got left. Plus, it's good to take care of your parents in their old age. Right?
    There's a catch.. Haha. This is going to be a long one, but trust me, it'll be a good read, especially if you're having issues with your own family right now.
    I let this one roll from the heart, and after going over the draft, I really think it'll offer some perspective on the problems inherent to the human animal's natural evolution of social culture.
    The catch I was referring to is that he abandoned my mother and I when I was only a year old because he's an extremely selfish "cluster B" (as known in psychiatry) personality type.
    Little did I know that forming a relationship with my father as an adult would give me so much insight into human psychology..
    So.. Borderline personality disorder, and classic narcissism are the name of the game, here. Two complexes from cluster B, (we all have these issues, but on a spectrum.. Few don't. It's an epidemic, I'm discovering..) and my father's got both to an extreme degree. This all stems from being raised by a mother with the same problems, who forced the whole family in to becoming Jehovah's witnesses.
    Now he's a Christian to cope with that, and also to cope with his relationship issues, and issues with his insecurities. The fact that these issues cause you to project all of your own issues on to others, while failing to see them in yourself as a defense mechanism, (a defensive complex being the mainstay of these issues, as a result of childhood emotional abuse and emotional abandonment,) makes it hard for him to get along with women, and Christianity offers regular events where he can socialize in a controlled environment that supports and is supported by his existing complex. Other people avoid him because of his personality complex, so this helps him cope with his loneliness. He finds excuses as to why no one wants to hang out with him outside of these events, though.. Usually these excuses include putting others down, like "oh, they're just lazy and self absorbed, so they ghost people because they're afraid to be honest about it.." (He has no problem putting others down.. If it happens to him, though, you'd better ghost him, quick, lol.)
    Also, in this community/culture, women are number two in the human heirarchy, and are to be submissive to men- as God decrees. It's a good excuse for him to avoid responsibility and confronting the result of his behavior on others feelings.. He keeps hoping a woman closer to his age that is single will join the church, and I think it's obvious why that is. He thinks all women are narcissistic, only care about what they can get out of you, and are overly critical of others while blind to their own terrible personality traits, instead lifting themselves highly above all others and absolving themselves of responsibility- but that's him, in a nutshell. Maybe it's most of us, these days.
    A classic example of this behavioral complex.. Recently, he got a puppy, a doberman, and had its ears trimmed. This surgery requires "posting" the ears with medical tape and padded rods, which takes a few sets of hands, as puppies don't sit still. The woman he got the puppy from failed to show up to help him, so he began calling me.. (I live in a trailer, on his property.. I can't live in the same house with him, lol. Maybe if he saw a psychiatrist and tackled his issues..) The thing is, I had recently plugged my phone in to charge it, and was getting ready to go to an appointment on my bike at the nearby doctor's office, so I couldn't hear it ringing..
    Just as I'm getting ready to pull off for the appointment, he comes BARGING out of the house with the dog in his hands, screaming at me and stomping his feet.. "MOTHERF****R, GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW, AND HELP ME WITH THIS," then storms back into the house..
    Keep in mind, my mother just died, and I had just moved back in with her as an adult to take care of her before she suddenly got sick, and cared for her for months, on hand and foot, even feeding her as she lost use of her limbs to chronic inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy, because she didn't want to die in the hospital.. I inherited her home, and sold it, completely consolidated her life, AND my life, split the money up with my siblings, and then moved to his property in order to care for him in HIS old age.. and remember, this is AFTER he abanonded me and my mother, leaving her to care for me all on her own in 1987, during one of the WORST recessions.. I had to wear dish towels as baby diapers.. and this guy is yelling at me, directing all of his anger at me, and judging ME for the way I live my life, when I've done nothing wrong, because he can't confront the truth..
    I feel it's important to point out that he has expressed that he feels bad about what he did, and wants to reconcile, but he never wants to look at the reality of the situation.. It's not like he CAN'T self reflect, he just has a really hard time doing it without struggling and fighting it. Kind of like the puppy with his ears, lol! Hopefully that dog helps him get over some of his anger issues, and doesn't make them worse.. He treats the dog better than he treats me, so maybe he will, if the dog's a proper pain, anyway.. Hopefully one day he realizes this and it all snaps into place, because in the moment I'm describing, all he can think is that I'm purposely ignoring his 5 back to back calls for some reason, and HE needs help with HIS responsibility. (Paranoia and always interpreting peoples words as aggressive/an attack is another symptom of this complex.)
    And this is something I would be more than happy to share the responsibility of, if he'd just treat me better...
    I've tried confronting him constructively about his personality and the things he does that make others feel like a pedestrian in a crosswalk, getting run down by a blind mind man behind the wheel of a semi-truck, but you can't make someone with these problems feel inadequate in any way, and that is how they will feel, no matter WHAT, if you in any way make them look at any kind of mistake they may have made.. They don't WANT to treat others like this, they're just unaware that they're doing it, and unwilling to self reflect.. They essentially act like their parent treated them, but refuse to see it in themselves because they've been traumatized by all of the criticism and abuse they sustained from them as a child. They never learned how to handle criticism, even if it's constructive, gentle, and caring.
    Does this sound like vaguely like anyone YOU know?
    It's strange.. but this is the legacy of humanity.. We become our parents, if we don't break free of them.. I'm almost GLAD my father left us.. Maybe I am glad.. I didn't think I was, really, until just now.. This is why it's good to self-reflect. It's how one heals themselves..
    It really pained me growing up without my dad.. I remember being little and seeing other kids with their fathers, and wondering where mine went.. Not as many parents were single when I was a kid.. Still, my mother was very kind and loving despite having her own issues, and raised me free-range. I wasn't aware at the time how good I had it, but I was allowed to become my own person, and the things I learned from her were compassion, and to be observant, and self-reflective..
    I am so thankful for the life I was blessed to have, and believe I've become an upstanding and kind man, who respects others.. Unfortunately, I also learned to beat myself up when I make others feel badly, something my mother had a habit of doing, (of course..) and it's really amplifying the damage that his behavior is doing to me now.. Not only that, but now I can see what she had such a hard time describing to me as a child, and why it was difficult for her to explain why my father wasn't there, or where he'd gone.. She was always a terrible liar.
    All those years, I let it bother me, only to realize I dodged a bullet in the long run.. We both did.. I just didn't know it, because she didn't have the heart to tell me that my father didn't love us, because he didn't know how to love himself..
    Hindsight is 20/20. It's so important to look inward, and to observe ones own legacy as its being created, or you might just leave behind a monster that everyone wants to forget, instead.

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Insightful. Although, are you sure you want to stay with your dad and suffer the torture? For what purpose?
      I for one can't forgive my parents for emotional neglect, abuse, domination, control and manipulation in my childhood. Even though they've changed their attitude to seemingly more kind and accepting once they buried their parents. But I don't believe they suddenly changed as persons, they just realised that they are next on the line, so started wearing different more appeasing masks.

    • @VynilCat
      @VynilCat ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      It was a long comment but I’m glad I read it, I hope your father can become a better person with the help of you or the dog, I also hope you can have a normal and if possible good relationship with your father. I have issues with my father too, but to a smaller extent. Just wishing you a good day in a lifetime of confusion, good luck.

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      @@VynilCat These people are permanently damaged. If they lack self reflection, you cannot save them. They are children stuck in psychological and emotional development due to early trauma.

  • @tristandaries1129
    @tristandaries1129 14 นาทีที่ผ่านมา +3

    This is actually ungodly timing, I usually don’t talk about my emotions with my dad, and we just had an unbelievably good conversation about how when I get super stressed over small things (I’m on the spectrum), it’s very hard for me to keep composure, and when I expected him to tell me that it’s a problem that I need to fix or else, we talked about what it’s like to spend every second of every day stressing over different stimuli, and he got a better understanding of why I act the way I do (sometimes rudely), it’s not because I intend to, it’s because I’m stressed and tired and can’t keep up a facade anymore

  • @annalockwood3021
    @annalockwood3021 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    This video has given me so much food for thought!! Thanks for sharing these ideas.
    I was caregiver to my elderly dad for a really long time, and only counseling and self reflection have helped me realize that so much of our interpersonal stress was a result of both our struggles with expressed emotion. Not sure, but I don’t think either one of us understood how much our assumptions about what counted as normal would make it more difficult to connect and communicate. I remember being really stuck in EOI, feeling that it was the only way to exist because his dementia and generally oblivious , defiantly self sufficient outlook were combining in ways that put him in physical peril far more often than he was able to acknowledge. It’s taken me a long time to find a more balanced sense of perspective.

  • @dapbear2771
    @dapbear2771 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    YOu have no idea how much ive waited for this with the current state of my mental being at an all time low living with my family

  • @stephenanthony5923
    @stephenanthony5923 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +5

    Family ruins my mind no more than the internet, the economy, the politics, the society, the universe and the my own mind

  • @KaiHonsou
    @KaiHonsou 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    I'm gonna comment before watching the video. My family ask me where I'm at, where I'll be over Christmas, and I avoid any familial interaction like it's the black plague. The Christmas period is the most stressful for me due to the gravity of family. They all hate each-other, but Christmas is the only time they will entertain the time within each others presence, and it's always, 100% bad. The pain it is to distance myself during the period when they are trying to come together outweighs the effort in that moment to suffer through being with family during the holidays.
    I Envy anyone who enjoys their family, genuinely cherish it for more than what it means to you, because for some family is nothing to what your experience is.

  • @chriswilliams8159
    @chriswilliams8159 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +5

    Better to be alone than with people that make you feel lonely, no matter who they are.

  • @ubik5453
    @ubik5453 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +19

    Is your family ruining your mental health?
    Me: When they celebrate christmas, yes.

  • @suyashbarwal
    @suyashbarwal 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    Couldn't be timed more perfect to be on my feed

  • @Cyril00001
    @Cyril00001 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +14

    Yes

  • @nazeirsvibingandstuff769
    @nazeirsvibingandstuff769 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    To be honest sometimes my parents fight about money issues or cheating every time it not only my health but it bothers my head 24/7 and think negatively or cause me turmoil.

  • @Heliocentrism_denier
    @Heliocentrism_denier ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Finally, a video that relates to me AND makes me cry

  • @ni4717
    @ni4717 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    I don’t even need to watch the video to say ‘yes’ been a lot better since I moved out. Still love them

  • @ScrimmyBingus42
    @ScrimmyBingus42 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I've had this exact experience with my own family. After I got out of the hospital interactions with my parents drove me into relapse.

  • @S.S.Candle-qb8uc
    @S.S.Candle-qb8uc 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Bro- My best friend just sent this to me. I don’t know how to feel: I’m this close to laughing and crying right now. Love ya, Girlie😭

  • @m0th1ng
    @m0th1ng 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    definitely. unfortunately there's nothing i can do to escape this

  • @kahaniwala121
    @kahaniwala121 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    This hit a bit too hard and I’m not even done w the video… invalidated so much I’m questioning how hard it even hit 😂😂😂

  • @andiralosh2173
    @andiralosh2173 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    You say "levels of the individual" but with family we're definitely getting into systems. At some point we'd address traumatizing and problematic issues on a cultural level

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      If you drill all the way down, you'll realize this is all the consequence of the economic system and how everything else is subservient to it. E.g. why narcissism prolifirates in modern society: it's a adaptation that gives benefits in current economic system. One can say that the economic system is affecting the natural selection and hence the direction of further evolution of humans.

  • @jacob_massengale
    @jacob_massengale 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    Yes, the answer is yes

  • @psychosenloge
    @psychosenloge 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    I Love you Sisyphus55.
    I wish you a lovely christmas time.

  • @San-li9ml
    @San-li9ml 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    Definitely.

  • @terraprisma1572
    @terraprisma1572 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    Yup

  • @maighe_tv2848
    @maighe_tv2848 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    I'm the italian guy who is gonna tell you that Trieste is pronounced Tree-est-eh

  • @dockydocks8694
    @dockydocks8694 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +4

    yes

  • @Darkondrago666
    @Darkondrago666 5 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    Great timing

  • @lordoffatcats
    @lordoffatcats 15 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    The timing of this video man

  • @alexxx4434
    @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Mental field is turning around after a period of blaming everything on the genetic factors and treating the symptoms with psycho drugs? Nah... who am I kidding?

  • @spacecommhafhiki
    @spacecommhafhiki 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    Pain

  • @googledrivetutorials7048
    @googledrivetutorials7048 2 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    Free Therapy doesn't work if there is nothing "wrong" in the family. Why do you need to seek treatment, if nothing is wrong.
    You can solve the issue by moving away, but the solution only lasts as long as you avoid the issue. It's like beating an addiction. As soon as the conditions are the same, you fall back into the addiction. Is there a way of beating this vicious cycle? I belive so, I just haven't found it yet.

  • @dominickw.3718
    @dominickw.3718 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    An insanely timed video.

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

      It never goes out of fashion!

  • @bgregz
    @bgregz 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Amazing and ironic timing.

  • @ProfOpp-ev9ks
    @ProfOpp-ev9ks ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Oh so it's not just me, cool.

  • @mildlyfeasible
    @mildlyfeasible 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    Before I watch this let me answer. Yes.

  • @devontaewilson5238
    @devontaewilson5238 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    It would be a dream come true for me because that's something I need indefinitely.

  • @xotwod3254
    @xotwod3254 7 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    Yes. I cannot afford to move out either.

  • @comradethatmetalguy
    @comradethatmetalguy 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I know this too well.

  • @pigsareit
    @pigsareit 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    What does ee stand for I've already forgotten

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Emotional Enmeshment?

    • @thedarpside9480
      @thedarpside9480 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      expressed emotion dude, he just said it 😭

    • @sallyjrwjrw6766
      @sallyjrwjrw6766 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@pigsareit expressed emotion

  • @water4039
    @water4039 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Probably

  • @Julliettwarner
    @Julliettwarner 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    YES THEY ARE!!!

  • @Arandjelovic-uk3mn
    @Arandjelovic-uk3mn 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    yes.

  • @bummer7736
    @bummer7736 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    yes😊

  • @-MichaelLastname-
    @-MichaelLastname- 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Haven’t watched, answer, yes.

  • @luxkzee
    @luxkzee 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    if you’re balkan - most likely

  • @MoizMN
    @MoizMN 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    hell yeah

  • @brrrrruce
    @brrrrruce 17 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    mean old algorithm

  • @mavrosskylos2989
    @mavrosskylos2989 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    gold

  • @jordanc3915
    @jordanc3915 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    There’s already 120 views in 2 mins🤯

  • @tylerhackner9731
    @tylerhackner9731 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Mine are really good tbh

    • @alexxx4434
      @alexxx4434 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      You lucky bastard!

  • @debasishdebnath8112
    @debasishdebnath8112 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    8 min ago is diabolical

    • @debasishdebnath8112
      @debasishdebnath8112 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Or maybe it's a communist propaganda

    • @Chrys4l1s
      @Chrys4l1s 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Bro what​@@debasishdebnath8112

  • @shauryamroy2162
    @shauryamroy2162 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Banger of a video watched it like an self life personification 😂

  • @DylanRDunn
    @DylanRDunn 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Wow

  • @RyanKarr-lw8rv
    @RyanKarr-lw8rv 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +7

    first?? jk sorry

    • @decrepitmanlet652
      @decrepitmanlet652 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      You are, you commented a second before someone else commented.

  • @zamheobi
    @zamheobi 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    👀

  • @serbanandrei7532
    @serbanandrei7532 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Auch

  • @dann7947
    @dann7947 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    First

    • @decrepitmanlet652
      @decrepitmanlet652 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      It seems Ryan Karr got here 1 second before you.

    • @dann7947
      @dann7947 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      @ T-T

  • @qxlum
    @qxlum 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    120 views in 3 minutes bro fell off so much

  • @paulob.d.1210
    @paulob.d.1210 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    Yes

  • @thewalrus5198
    @thewalrus5198 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +3

    yes

  • @_stiffmeister33
    @_stiffmeister33 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    yes.

  • @aluckyheron
    @aluckyheron 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +2

    yes

  • @ComposerKuandohan
    @ComposerKuandohan 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Yes

  • @mkly0126
    @mkly0126 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Yes

  • @nbeutler1134
    @nbeutler1134 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา +1

    Yes