Love this lol, hubby, son and I all have ADHD/ADD and or other mental health stuff that has some very similar symptoms lol.... We actually say "Squirrel" to each other if we notice one of us is getting side tracked. As for keys, that's why all of us have either a lanyard or wristlet they go on, which we'd keep on while out and about, and a place near the door where we're supposed to always hang em when we get in, but squirrel 🐿️ lol
My favorite adult ADHD moment was losing my wallet and keys one morning. I was watching a webinar and couldn't find them when it was time to leave for work. I found them 2 days later, under my large wave ergomic keyboard. That's right, I accidentally set the keyboard over them, while watching a webinar on (. . .wait for it. . .) getting organized with ADHD.
I have tiles on everything. My keys. My vape. My medicine. I can use any one of those items to find my phone. Invest in them. They have been a life changer.
Sounds about right for ADHD. I used to mid place my keys all the time and call my parents crying because I’m trying to leave for school. 9/10 times they were in the place I always keep my keys and I totally missed them. One other time I lost my college student ID and you need that to open your dorm building door (its one of those things you see at a hotel to get in your room) and so for a couple days my roommate had to let me in the building.
When you have ADHD, hear him explain "the refrigerator one" and you're like "yup. make sense to me" just to see her reaction and realized you're not "supposed" to think it make sense.
I was once using the toilet and I realised I needed a shower, so I got undressed while sitting there. I remembered to take my shirt to the dirty clothes basket but forgot my pants. I was in the shower and my wife came into the bathroom and asked, "Why are your pants perfectly gathered in front of the toilet like you just got raptured in the middle of a shit?"
The thing about pants is that they are foldable, so when I do things like that I remember I can just fold it over my arm so I only need to make on trip 😆
I just realized after 37 years of marriage that my husband constantly leaving cabinet doors standing wide open is simply a symptom of his ADHD (which he was diagnosed with some 25 years ago.) This particular behavior had puzzled me for years. Thanks Penn and Kim!
The train of thought with the pants by the fridge is so relatable lol. I feel seen. I once went to get a glass of water, and in doing so realized that there were dishes that needed to be put in the dishwasher from last night. There was a paper towel left on one of the plates so I went to throw it away, realized that the trash needed to be taken out, and decided to get the trash in my bedroom as well since I'm terrible about taking it out before it's overflowing (thankfully it's never anything that can rot). While I was getting the trash from my room I remembered that I had to take a piece of mail out to the mailbox, so I figured I would do that while I was taking the trash out. I wasn't wearing socks at the time, so I went to put some on and grab my shoes. I didn't have any clean socks in my drawer, but it reminded me that I had left my laundry in the dryer. So I went downstairs to bring the laundry up so I would have socks to wear. I brought the laundry up, and that was that. Nothing else got done except throwing away the paper towel, and I never got my glass of water. So to recap: - did't get a glass of water (the entire point of this adventure) - didn't put the dishes in the dishwasher - threw away the paper towel (success?) - didn't take the trash out - didn't bring the mail out to the mailbox - brought the laundry upstairs (success?)
Reminds me of a comment that I read on a Facebook post about forgetful children. It said (more or less) "Yes, children do need discipline and guidance, but good grief, how many adults have bad days or forget their stuff on a regular basis."
My ADHD was seriously stressing me out yesterday, and then this morning I woke to this. Thank you. I've only been diagnosed for a few months and your ADHD videos are something I revisit often when I need to laugh about it. So, yeah, just thank you. 😊
Same with me I’ve had tests in 3 days... Math. Math stressed me out and I also have adhd so a lot of math things are hard. I’m just a fiddler so I fidget a lot in class. It’s hard for me
My nephew has ADHD and is learning to deal with it and we were so excited to see Penn with the ADHD shirt that says ‘ADHD is Awesome’ that we bought one for him. Thanks for spotlighting it into a positive not a negative!
You left your keys at the beach? Reminds me of the time I left my purse in the grocery cart in front of the store and didn't realize it until I got home. It was still there when I went back which was a miracle. lol I also threw my keys away while taking the garbage out once. didn't realize it until AFTER the garbage man came... so that was great. Right now I am missing my mail key... so I cant get my mail until my husband is home. Not sure when I will get around to getting a new one, probably never.
I had to use an electric scooter at the store because of a knee problem and I left my purse in it when I gave it to an elderly lady when I was leaving... it had my keys in it or I'd have gone home none the wiser and my roommate had to run around the store (the employees not willing ot help) to find the lady.
I once found someone's wallet in a cart when I was putting mine back. It freaked me out!!! I grabbed it and ran back in the store with it so I could find a manager to help me try to find identification for who it belonged to. I didn't think it was safe for myself or the wallet owner to go through it alone. We couldn't find a driver's license, but we were able to find credit cards with the last name and a work ID with the first name. We called the employer and they were able to get in touch with the wallet owner, so thankfully there is a happy ending. The wallet was put into the safe in the Manager's office once we got to the bottom of who it belonged to, and she was able to safely retrieve it from the store. I had wanted to hang around to see her feeling relieved but I was pregnant at the time and needed to rest after all that excitement. Thankfully I left my phone number asking for an update because I was so freaked out over this and both she and the manager called me to let me know that she got her wallet back safe and sound.
IKR? I have tried writing parody lyrics and it's really hard. I Newberry finish the snooker song. (I left those autofills in because they're funny. "I never finish the whole song" was what I was trying to type.)
I have what I call wtf brain hour where I walk around the house checking that I haven't left everywhere and the fridge open etc. It's been a lifesaver because it doesn't build up if I do it often
I actually have an "inbox" in each room where I can set things down. So if I lose something, I can check them first and clear them out each night. I also have a charging station for electronics and a designated work bag location, I place my things directly in front of the door, and I have a magnet on the door to put up notes for major reminders.
Not only do I have ADHD, but two of my boys do as well. I totally identify with stopping in the middle of a task to “quickly” do this other thing and then hours later remember I never finished the first task! But even with my tendency to misplace things, I also feel Kim’s pain of finding things in really weird places because my boys will pick something up to fiddle with while moving through the house and then absently drop it somewhere without even realizing they had picked it up in the first place! I can’t tell you how many times over the years I’ve exclaimed, “Why is X in the...never mind, I know why. SMH”, LOL!
He leaves things on top of high places because he's tall and they're readily available. The spaces are available because she's shorter and probably doesn't store things where she can't easily reach them. My entire family has ADHD. On the plus side, you have a lot of fun adventures. On the minus side, it is really frustrating to watch everyone else's families function as expected while yours runs around like the Keystone Cops. As a child and the best hyper-focuser, I compensated for my scattered parents and siblings by obsessively watching the clock and making lists in hopes of organizing everyone. My dad learned to tell the family we had to be somewhere 1 1/2 hours before an event really started so we'd have a prayer of being on time. We were typically 20 minutes late to everything despite that. We always joked we'd be late to our own funerals, and my brother actually was -- because we arrived late to the memorial with his ashes. As the wife and mother of ADHD folks, there are plenty of days I want to kill them all because every door and drawer is standing open, nobody can find anything because every storage and horizontal space looks like a junk drawer, and it's utter chaos. Then I can't find my own shoes and I've half-completed six tasks in six different rooms, and I remember why we're in this literal mess. We are great at setting up organizational structures; they last three weeks before mass ADHD defeats them, we decide the structure is the problem so we reinvent the wheel by devising a new system. Lather, rinse, repeat.
This may explain why the librarians look at me like I’m crazy when I tell them lost books can be found in the most unlikely places. (As in, yes, I did return the book, and you need to look under things whether you think it’s likely it’ll be there.)
😂 once I was trying to do my math homework and I ended up writing a parody called I am never ever gonna, need algebra of we are never ever ever getting back together about how I won’t use algebra in real life
The first time I left my husband home with the kiddos for any prolonged period of time was when I flew to stay with my sister and help out with her newborn. That first night I called the kids, told them goodnight... got ANOTHER call an hour later, thought it was husband telling me how much he missed me- nope. "Honey? I can't find my keys anywhere. I think I lost them." Mind you, I'm 2,000 miles away at this point. (Spoiler alert: They were in the fridge.)
I ADHD-skimmed this and legit thought that the kids were in the fridge and checked the comments to see who had shamed you. Saw no shame and re-skimmed this. Thank God it was the keys 😅
My ADHD screams - I need a Kim! While I'm trying to be Kim (shiny... squirrel...oh follow the trail of open things!) for my family - oh man do I feel you with those doors, drawers, and socks!
I've done that but with a phone, not a cell phone, but the remote ones that are bulky and have a charging station. You know the one's that always use in '90s movies. Kinda hard to miss when it's sitting next to a carton of milk.
I just found your videos. These are great! I dont have the being messy problem. I have developed a set of routines that help me keep up with things. For example, I keep my water cup in only one of 3 places. My keys always go on my desk. My phone is either on my desk, my pocket or in the car. My routine when i walk out the door is to count, 1, 2, 3. I make sure I have 3 items....my keys, wallet, phone. I always make a list if there are more than 3 items to remember. Routines are very important to help ground me. They are a baseline. Then I can add temporary tasks to them. As long as the routines are completed, I'm not so distracted during the day. At work I do multiple things at the same time because my brain is moving faster than the computer.
Jessica from “How to ADHD”needs to do a video with Penn 🧠 and Kim 💜. That would be AWESOMENESS!!! No, idea what the topic or song would be. There could be numerous ones. Whatever it is, it would be soo cool.
I'm also hard of hearing and between the "Ooh, shiny! and "Huh? What did you say?" it takes the patience of a saint for my husband to have a conversation with me.
Or start talking to you before they have your attention and then get mad because you came into the conversation late and didn't hear a thing they said prior to that point?
I love that you are so open and honest about having ADHD. But I would really like to see more from Kim about how she handles it. My husbamd has ADHD, and it's hard on both of us. The stress of living with people with ADHD is huge. I would love you guys to do a video on 10 ways to survive your partner's ADHD, similar to your 10 ADHD lifehacks.
Tip one: The person with ADHD doesn't get to use it as a get-outta-jail- free card and owns their stuff. Tip Two: find a medication regime that works for Both of You. Been with my ADHD and wonderful husband for 20 years. From the beginning I demanded a say-so in the meds. I have to live with the results, too. There have been 2 meds that he was on that I vetoed the hell out of because one made him a monster, the other a comatose couch potato. Both meds were his favorite when he took each of them. Either would have made him a single man. Sometimes a good medication, that we both like, stops working. I HATE that because it is always me who notices first and has to have the "something is going on with your meds" conversation, the immediate reply is Always, "Nuh-Uh!" (just a knee-jerk denial) and the month that follows where I have to point out what each example of non-normal behavior is and explain how it affects our lives...Then he'll ask the doctor about it. I've likened it to riding a merry-go-round that never stops. But then again, I'm getting to ride it with my best friend.
From the perspective of a spouse with ADHD I can share things that have helped my husband and I.... 1. Work together to build systems that reduce stress and chaos. One example is that we have a bowl or hook right at the door where keys go as soon as we come in the house. It's convenient, it's visible, it's consistent, and it has drastically reduced the number of times the keys get lost. It won't solve it 100%, but it reduces it. Another example of this is putting a laundry hamper wherever your spouse bus most likely to get changed so putting clothes in it is easy and natural. Also, make putting away laundry as simple and streamlined as possible. So unless they love crazy socks like I do, get the same two or three kinds of socks and just throw them all in a drawer or basket instead of pairing them. For underwear, just throw them in a drawer or basket rather than trying to make them folded and tidy. I have found I do better hanging a vast majority of my clothes now that I have the closet space to do so because then I don't have to fold and I can see more of my clothes when I am trying to find them. These kinds of systems vary, but the easier and more natural it is for things to land where they should be, the less stress there is. 2. Build routines together. Routines for things like getting dressed, showering, brushing teeth, and day to day responsibilities are so helpful to my ADHD brain. Routines reduce the amount of executive function I need to get things done and my husband helped me figure out what routines I needed and what to include in them. And if I get off track in a routine he can often just ask questions (Are your clothes ready? Did you pack your lunch?) And that is often all I need to get back on track. 3. Understand that an organized person with ADHD looks different than a neurotypical organized person and try to be ok with that. If need be, set boundaries on spaces so your space can be organized your way and their space can be organized their way and shared space find compromises that you both can work with. For ADHD brains, the more steps to make sure that something ends up in the right place, the less likely it is to end up there so using methods like baskets or clear boxes can be super helpful. 4. When it comes to chores and adult responsibilities, don't be afraid to try dividing tasks in different ways to figure out what works. My husband is super good at cleaning and cooking. I suck at those tasks but he isn't very good at managing our finances or getting some of the yard work done and I am pretty good at those things. Some things we share like shopping (I am great at getting things we can order online but grocery stores are my kryptonite). This doesn't mean that I never clean or cook or go to a grocery store, but they aren't my primary responsibilities. 5. Lists! Checklists and packing lists and grocery lists and calendars are so helpful! If I have a list it's easier for me to stay on track. Everyone is different, but those are some things that have helped me and my husband reduce the chaos that is me and my ADHD brain.
We all have ADD/ADHD at our house. Medication helps us tremendously, so does meditation, and so does swimming. My son is on a swim team, he swims two hours a day, his symptoms virtually disappear when he swims everyday. But if he ever takes a break from swimming for more than a few days his symptoms start to come back.
I agree with the others, it’s all about finding a system that works. And realizing that his ideal system is going to look different than your ideal system. Since he’s currently the stay at home parent, I defer to his “methods” of organization, even if they don’t make sense to me. But I still have control over certain small areas of the house that he doesn’t have to interact with daily. Having those areas organized in my way gives my brain the ability to function properly too. I also echo the medication/exercise part. When we first married he worked 50 hrs a week in a warehouse and his symptoms were well controlled, but when he quit to stay home he needed to go on medication. We got lucky and the first one worked well, but he has to be strict with the time of day he takes it. Not a hardship, but something we had to learn through trial and error.
My wife and I currently have 16 Tiles between us. If you lose something important, you stick a Tile to it. We still lose the remotes to our TVs almost every day though. Our first date was at a local dive bar and when she showed up without her ID, I though it was an attempt to get out of the date early. Nope. She just can't keep track of her driver's license.
I just love all your videos, but this one hits home. At 56 years old I just got diagnosed with ADHD. I have been a minimalist because it helps me keep things organized when there’s not so much stuff to lose. Having a place for everything helps, but there are still many ADHD moments. Penn, have you ever tried Tile? It’s a little tag you can put on your keychain that lets you find he location, much like “find my iPhone”. Providing you can find your phone to locate your keys 😄 Please keep up the videos. They are balm to our frazzled minds!
The amount of times I have had to say “I’m sorry my brain doesn’t work like yours. Yours works like this -- mine works like this ~~~.” because I have ADHD haha.
OMG I love that explanation! I have to tell neurotypical people "your thoughts run in a straight line, mine look like the flying spaghetti monster! :) " People seem to "get" that
You bring up a good point! While I don't have ADHD I have something that makes my brain works similarly and my husband has ADHD Tendencies as well it makes life in our house a little interesting sometimes. :-)
I am the one with ADHD, not the hubby, but I spend half my life looking for things he can't find. Life hack--get an awesome key rack and keep it by whichever door Penn goes thru most (garage?) It has literally saved me HOURS of looking for our keys. Now if I could only find a similar hack for the remote!
First off, wonderful video. This is normally where I would write something incisive for a chuckle. While I cannot immediately identify with Penn's travails as detailed in the video (I've trained myself to double-check for my keys), I have my own troubling way of undoing all that I've worked for. At least Penn has a loving family as part of his support. This makes him a very fortunate individual.
As I was listening to Penn’s story about the pants in front of the fridge, I saw the logic in every step. Regarding keys, I totally understand that. Sometimes, it is just a matter of forgetting to finish the process of removing the keys from the ignition. My mom, who also has ADHD, managed to leave her keys in the ignition, engine on, locked in the car, for the entirety of Titanic when we went to see it at the movie theatre. She’d simply gotten distracted and forgotten to take the keys out.
Everyone has that duh moment where they lay something down or forget to finish a task. We say "oh I was tired", or "Had to stop doing that to go do.... because ...." I refer to the ADHD brain as trigger happy. ADHD people are so smart! The thoughts form normally, but then the ADHD brain shoots those thoughts full of holes, while running on a hamster wheel, juggling, and considering their 401k investment plan, at the same time. The swiss cheese thoughts sometimes just lay there as a result.
I don't have a key fob, so the only way I can lock my keys in the car is if I press the lock button on the inside of the door while the door is open and then get out and close the door. That being said, I've locked my mom's keys in her car before. Thankfully we were close enough to home that she could walk back and get the spare, but it was still a good 5 miles when it was all said and done.
I haven't left my keys in the car recently (see, hear, AND feel the keys before I close that door!) but I do have a key fob. (I wear that around my neck on a lanyard.) I got out of the car at the post office one day to mail a letter; the truck had just pulled up so I was in a hurry to get the mail in the box. I got back in the car to find -- yup! I'd forgotten to shut the car off. I have a lot of routines that non-ADHD'ers would find very strange, like the keys one I just mentioned. I keep having to come up with new ones . . .
I spent nearly an hour searching for my eyeglasses on Friday. The were on my face. I'm nearly blind without them and it never clicked that I was seeing things clearly while looking for my glasses. Oh well...
I can't watch this without crying, because I couldn't live like that anymore. "I'm my own worst enemy" is spot on. Concerta is my best friend, after my wife. Kim and Penn - you are both brilliant, wonderful, saints. Thank you for sharing your creativity, music, and lives to make the world a brighter place.
My Hubby's got ADD (no H) and I could so relate to this video...especially the kitchen cupboards. The other night (we have our own bedrooms) I was looking for my remote to turn off the tv and I had to get up and go to his room and ask if he happened to put it in his housecoat pocket. That's typical around here. Nope, it wasn't it in his pocket so he helped me strip my bed to look for it. As he was picking up a pillow something fell out of the front of his housecoat. Of course it was my remote. "It wasn't in my pocket" was his reply. It's a good thing my Hubby is cute.
@@creattiva90 Not doubting that. But does she carry a stepladder with her or one of those mirrors on a stick things? Just talking about the physical line of sight issue.
Lol. Funny thing is, I'm the spouse with ADHD, but I'm still the one picking up after everyone else. Mind you, my house is a mess all the time, because I'm not the best house keeper, or the most organized by far, but I am the one picking up after everyone else.
OMG. ME TOO!! My husband is SO frustrated at me, yet I walk around ALL day picking up stuff. House is still ALWAYS a disaster!!! (PS. As a school project in French, my kids had to name the “most organized” family member, and (bless her heart) my daughter said, “Mom”!! Because despite my scatter brain... if I weren’t here, the kids wouldn’t have a clean article of clothing or ever eat home-cooked meals.)
There’s a bitter laugh that no matter what the skills of family members, it’s the mom and the daughters who are supposed to keep the guys clean, fed and organized
I’ve lost my keys on a photo shoot in a forest and never recovered them. I’ve left my coffee in my kid’s closet... my ID/Debit card in a laundry basket... I forget to set alarms when I’m cooking and burn ish all the time... I swear Penn, you make songs for my brain.
I have to ask exactly how did you manage to leave your coffee in your kid’s closet what was the reason that you left it their and was it a cup of brewed coffee or the coffee grounds as I can’t think of any reason why you would leave a cup of brewed coffee in your kids closet but then again I don’t know why you would put the coffee grounds their either
It's never dull, that's for sure! Once on a weekend trip, we got to our destination and realized my son had no shoes. Not his extra shoes... NONE of his shoes. Yep, he was barefoot and had zero shoes. We asked him and he said, "oh, I thought you had them."
@@mykijiji1958so I am assuming that the last time that he took said coat off he thought he did so while in the car when the last time he took it off was actually inside the house or something
Thanks to your videos, I have come to understand why I've always been so forgetful and can't finish tasks. I've always been very hard on myself, thinking I was just lazy and had bad time management skills. I just want to say thank you for sharing your experiences. I'm finally able to understand what's going on with my brain and work with it instead of against it. I'm much happier and more content with life now, and I have you guys to thank for it!
Haha... Soo Penn I'm ADHD and my husband is ADHD inatentive with no short term working memory... I have to put things in the same spot or I can't find them! (He's resisting all the systems I've set up 😆) but I legit have a basket for masks, keys and things I need when I leave the house u just dump it in your bag and go... But it's now in a construction zone Soo just this past week I lost keys 3 times, broke prescription sunglasses, and replaced a phone.
i love how his wife is so supportive of his silliness to participate in these videos. They make a great team. whenever I sing or have moments of inspired silliness (at least I think so haha) it will be met with disapproving sighs or condescending comments, or a friendly invitation to "grow up"
I'm not sure if I have it but I spend soo much time looking for things and seeing half-finished chores while thinking 'oh yeah... I still need to finish that'
I have ADD. At times I'm experiencing the same things but my brain seems to rev up by the minute. Makes perfect sense to leave cabinets and refrigerator doors open while cooking to get out ingredients but wash every dirty plate, cup, bowl, or measuring spoon as soon as it touches something. I've put scissors in the fridge. I left a plate of food in the bathroom. Guinea pig in a kitchen chair. My skill at balanced stacking of random objects should make me a Jenga champion.
I get ADD my son has it. He doesn’t have the H though. He has learned how to work with it sometimes unless he’s stressed. Then it gets a little hectic. He’s 34 and in the army 🇺🇸 💚. He has to make it work. Penn you get frustrated with yourself? Have you learned coping mechanisms?
Thank you so much for helping to keep this sunny, I'm remembering the time I froze my credit card in a container of ice to stop impulse spending, forgot I had done this and pretty much forgot about the credit card, and then when we were moving, asked my sister to clean out the fridge, defrost the freezer etc. The credit card went out with the trash and, weeks later when I needed the card, we pieced together what had happened and I called to cancel it. Also, I locked my keys in the car with the car running the morning of my Dad's funeral. I was very lucky to be in Mom's driveway when it happened and she had an extra set of my car keys in her house :)
this song really speaks to me. as someone who has literalyl left the tv remote AND her landline (tho wireless) phone *in the freezer*, i can't believe i wasn't diagnosed with adhd until last week.
OMG… I can SO relate. When my best friend and I started our business, my daughter was about 2. She fell asleep in our back office (highly unusual), and I was having a rather hectic time dealing with member behaviors and a changed routine that day. Got everyone ready to go on route to do home drop-offs, got into the van, and started driving. My best friend was still working her job and called me on her ride home and we chatted as I drove. We finished, I hung up the phone, and as I was ten minutes out of town it dawned on me: I FORGOT MY 2-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER AT THE BUILDING ALL ALONE! Immediately called my friend back and told her to stop at the building and why. We so laugh about it now as I get ready to send that same daughter (also diagnosed with ADHD…) off to college.🤣🤪🤣🤪
I have 3 Tiles. One for my keys, one for my purse and one that hangs on a hook behind the front door and DOES NOT COME OFF THE HOOK. That way I can press the Tile and at least find my phone and then find all the other things with the phone on the Tile app. It's the best I can do some days.
I have ADHD and my fiance is autistic... we eventually find almost everything we misplace but it takes a lot longer and our methods are slightly different from how neurotypical people would find stuff. Also we kind of have to gently nudge each other to pick up or things would never get done. He reminds me of all the things I started and stopped so I get back to them and helps me with my decision making paralysis and I help encourage him to start stuff and help him with his decision making paralysis. Balance... or as much of it as we can get.
@@jeffreym68 I'm sorry for your loss. And I can understand not realizing how much less functional you are without your partner. I know it's not exactly the same because my fiance hasn't passed but he lives in Canada and I live in the US so we've been apart since before covid. We do video chat daily and they help but we've both been doing a lot worse without being able to see each other. I hope things get better for you and that you're able to find peace and happiness and someone or something to give you the nudge you need.
@@danidynamite2 Thank you. It must be hard for you as well being so distant in such difficult times. I hope you can be together soon. It's been a process of learning where my limits are and how far I can push them, plus finding ways to get nudges elsewhere. I suspect that at this point, I really can't live alone anymore, but the next steps are difficult ones.
Please Keep it coming with the ADHD videos!!! I have 2 in the family and until ur videos they viewed it as a curse.. Now they thinks its funny, and quirky.. Not quite to the "super power" point yet.. But a few more encouraging videos from you guys and who knows?! 😍 ps.. Tips from Kim would be great..I'm going nuts trying to help "without helping"...🤪
Another bullseye. :) Honestly, guys, I have to be honest - you pulled me through 2020, and are still working it. Thank you. When I think I can't deal anymore, I check to see if you have a new song. And you almost always do. And it almost always helps.
Sorry, to hear this. It is very true that understanding health problems makes a huge difference. Both for people who have them, and the people around them. I spend a lot of time teaching my daughter about her ADHD, and I spend a lot of time teaching her grandparents about it too. People with ADD/ADHD don’t choose to be this way, we often try very hard not to be this way, but if we try to force ourselves to do certain things, like pay attention to something we are struggling to pay attention to, it often makes it much worse. Imagine trying to force your self to overcome cold or flu symptoms, you can’t, and if you try to force yourself to do things, while you are sick that you just don’t feel good enough to do, you make it worse, much worse. ADHD is an illness just like the flu is an illness, except it never really goes away. We do need to learn how to manage our symptoms, and an important part of managing our symptoms is knowing what they are and why we have them. Just like understanding cold or flu symptoms in an important part of managing them. Once we know something is a symptom and not a personal choice or a personality trait, we can stop blaming ourselves, and being hard on ourselves for it, and we can seek out legitimate solutions. Just like it would be bad if we blamed ourselves for coughing, but we don’t because we understand coughing is a symptom we don’t choose to have and we can’t will it to go away. It is hugely helpful when others understand what we are going through and why we do the things we do. Compassion and understanding go a long way, they are even more important and helpful than medications, although medications can be hugely helpful too. There is no way I can do my job or my chores without my medications, they have been life changing for me. This is exactly why there are awareness campaigns for so many illnesses. People need to be understood and they need compassion concerning their problems. I do hope that this will encourage you to learn more about ADD/ADHD, and I hope that this can help you have a better relationship with your ex, especially if the two of you share children, and if you are still in contact with one another.
4 hours and i think for sure. This is all i can endure Lunch is incomplete I forgot to eat Im so befuddled My thoughts obscured Then when, i get engrossed In writing song lyrics on a TH-cam post This is not constructive or what i had planned But now i gotta finnish Or give up the ghost... My whole damb brain is just so obsessed. It cant be suppressed So just make the best! getting distracted Tasks are impacted Still need to eat It's making me stressed And i still havent done the laundry And i haven't drunk my tea... Nothing progresses but the messes The hunger and glee... Groan. A. D.H.D
This is not me but it's my mom who I inherited ADHD from... We were on vacation many years ago and we took our camper. And we got to the site and it's a pop-up camper so you you know disconnected from your car and then it has a little lifting mechanism that you know opens it up and shoots out the beds and the door falls and place and you click a bunch of little things and all together. Afterwards we are you know settling in and my mom starts freaking out and she can't find her purse anywhere. We search the vehicle high and low everywhere could not find the purse. We searched inside the camper high and low my mom's freaking out! My dad is outside taking pictures vacation that kind of thing and he calls my mom out. She's still freaking out he says here look through the lens and look at look up there so my mom's just grabs the camera and looks through the site and he says no no look here and points in the direction she needs to look. And their sits my mom's purse on top of the camper about 30 ft in the air! Lol! So we have to lower the camper to get the purse down. So I come by ADHD very honestly definitely inherited. Oh! And we have a picture of my mom's purse sitting on top of the camper! It's like my favorite picture we have ever taken in our family! Lol!
I see here you have, you know, absolutely used the wonderful friend to all ADHD ers and you have, you know, written this comment out in voice text :-) you know
KIM! Omg I almost couldn't make it through this video I identified so hard with your plight!! My husband is the same way! Not about keys, but about half-doing things... Or it not occurring to him to finish things - the dishes, picking up his trash, putting laundry away, etc etc etc... I feel ya, lady friend!
Try, "Hey google," phone beep, "sing me a song."(Requires voice recognition setup.) Or just have someone call. Need to figure out one for apple iphone for my mom. We lose our phones often. (Tempted to get square or tile. But we'd probably forget to change the batteries.)
"Squirrel" reminds me so much of my son! Before I started working from home, I used to spend parts of my day looking for my keys, phone, &/or sunglasses Occasionally I get up in the morning, can't find my car keys,. Then I find them hanging in the back door, unfortunately on the outside, but hey, that's like leaving your car keys in the ignition with the windows down, really makes people question if it's a trap
ADHD, Autism, Asperger's and any other disability is God's why of giving u all super powers💖 there needs to be more knowledge, understanding and help out there for anyone who is struggling with any sort of disability 🤔 thank u for this video Penn And Kim 📹👌 Love you guys 💕💖
@@karaa7595 I'm sorry to hear that😢. My youngest has Asperger's and finds it hard at times. More awareness and help needed out there that's for sure. Xx
I agree 100%!! I have two boys on the spectrum and myself have ADD. I have been a single mom for the last twenty years and my sons are in their twenties now. It is not always easy but we work together as best we can for each other.
My mother couldn't find her keys one day and she blamed the grandkids for losing them. About 2 months later we were up at my parents other property for the weekend and my mom had brought up steaks from her freezer (important fact here) to cook on the grill. When she opened the package of steaks low and behold there sat her keys, on top of the steaks. Some how when she was packaging meat up months back her keys got put in one of the packages. We still tease her about it.
Bahaha I love you guys! I too have ADHD and leave my keys, bag, and now mask EVERYWHERE. I was 15min late to the gym this morning, looked in my bag 4 times, and on the 5th time they appeared. Twice I've had locksmiths out. Twice I've left them in the ignition. Fortunately there's been no travel this year so I haven't had to run for or completely miss trains or flights for awhile now!! 🤦🏻♀️😂
First of all!!!! congrats on finishing this video and lyrics ect, its amazing!!!!!! All of these things, the video, everything ate perfection. So relatable, i have done them all too, i feel broken all of the time, ty for helping not feel alone and bringing the comic relief!!! 😹💕🤗 ty for being you and sharing!!!!
Once my husband took one of my two rings from by the sink to put somewhere safe.... We searched everywhere and eventually assumed either the kids dropped it down a vent or a great house guest wasn't so great and had stolen it. A year later while registering our son for kindergarten we found it... In the filing cabinet... With the birth certificates... He wanted to put it somewhere "safe" and never even remember doing so all the time we were searching and suspecting our poor houseguest.
ADHD/ADD has its upsides too. It can be incredibly fun, unless you have responsibilities you need to pay attention to at the moments your ADD is acting up, then it’s torture. But in the moments we can let our ADD run wild it is incredibly fun and entertaining. I have not been board for decades, my brain is incredibly entertaining. People with ADHD/ADD are often incredibly creative. I was not at all surprised the guy in this video has ADHD, given how musical and creative he is with his songs and videos. The ADD brain often gets stuck on slower brain wave frequencies, and it can be very hard for us to switch to faster or slower brainwave frequencies, unlike most people who do so easily and automatically. Think of most people’s brains as a car with automatic transitions, they can easily move from slower speeds to faster, then slower again and then even into parking. It’s so easy and automatic most people don’t even know they are doing it. Think of our ADD/ADHD brains as a manual with gear shifts that don’t work well, we try to switch gears but get stuck, and either nothing changes and we cannot speed up or slow down, which is problematic, or the car seems to fight it and suddenly jerks back and forth. It can be very painful when we try to force our brains to transition to something in order to pay attention to it. The Slower brainwave frequencies we often get stuck in are associated with creativity, problem solving, day dreaming. Many of the world’s most creative people have ADD/ADHD. Countless artist, musicians, actors, writers, cake decorators, inventors, designers, advertisers, home builders, all sorts of people involved in movies, or plays at any level have ADD/ADHD. Countless celebrities, entertainers, professional athletes etc have ADHD/ADD. Google search celebrities with ADD and you will probably find a long list of very famous people. We are capable of creating entire worlds in our heads, and we are very good at coming up with new ideas, or new uses for things that others would never be able to. We also have hyper focus. Which is both a blessing and a curse. Hyper focus makes us completely obsessed with things, once something gets in our heads we can’t stop thinking about it or working on a project. This is a blessing because we create amazing things and we become experts on many subjects. But it is a curse because it is very hard to stop even for food, bathrooms breaks, responsibilities that need our time and attention, or even sleep. This is part of that not being able to shift brain wave frequencies problem. You need different brainwave frequencies for focus, than you do for eating, sleeping, interruptions, boring stuff, etc. basically making any transition can be hard for us. In fact, hyper focus is why am I writing such a long detailed post right now instead of doing my house work, or helping my daughter with homework right now, like I should be. So people think that ADD/ADHD people have a hard time focusing or paying attention, but that is only partially true. We have a very hard time focusing our attention on things that are boring, uninteresting to us, or that we don’t want to do. We cannot stop focusing on things we are passionate about, or that excite us. We often get lost in thought, sucked into video games, TV shows, social media, or lost in our creative work. So that’s why we have a hard time focusing on things like work, school, cleaning, putting things away, people talking us, etc., because our brains are so focused on whatever really interesting stuff we happen to be stuck on thinking about, dreaming up, or creating, that we cannot pay attention to the things around us or things we should be doing at the same time. And because we struggle to switch gears, so to speak, we can’t just stop what we are thinking about, pay attention to another task at hand, and later go back to what we were thinking about. It is also why we lose things, because we are not paying attention to things when we set them down or when we put them away, so we have no idea where they ended up, or where we put them, even when we purposefully put them away somewhere, we simply have no memory of where we put them. It is not because we have memory problems, it is because you cannot make a memory of something your conscious mind never saw or heard. We do much better if we can just go at our own pace, be very go with the flow, we don’t struggle at all when when we can be like that. And we can let our creativity flow uninterrupted and we can create amazing things. But unfortunately the rest of the world works with rigid schedules, that require waking up early and easily, which we often can’t do at all, or without a painful fight. (we struggle both with falling asleep and waking up, because they both require major brain wave transitions). Many people with ADD/ADHD do well with home school or working from home, because we can design our own schedules which really helps. We also do better working with our hands, than doing book work or paper work, because when our hands are moving we can usually pay attention better. It can be next to impossible for us to force ourselves to meet strict structured schedules that most schools and businesses require, and it can be very difficult for us to do a lot of work that is not creative or hands on, it really drains our energy fast and burns us out quickly.
Well, *I* did the spit take at SQUIRREL but have also been known to leave the freezer door open, only once overnight. Now my husband does a "Kim" and checks the house before he goes to bed.
I adore how you show how this atypical brain configuration impact you and the ppl around you. Power to both of you. Like my colleage expect me to come back to office 2-3 times before I leave with everithing I need for my next work. Smt they also help with the stuff I miss. Like oh hey you left your phone. Work life man.
@@bellasingh9541 having an issue with people saying your partner is attractive is weird and overly possessive. "This dude is hot" does not translate to "Im gonna try and get with him". My boyfriend is attractive (and completely out of my league). Anytime someone comments on his looks I'm just like "I know right? Feel free to drool with me"
So I lose my stuff a LOT. I wound up getting a "gentlemans organizer" from Amazon. That is right by the front door. The second I enter the door, everything goes in it. Keys, wallet, watch, knife, etc. It also has deodorant in it in case I forget on my walk out lol
My biggest problem is looking for my phone. I’ll even call someone asking them to see if they know where it is!!! While I’ve had it in my hand the whole time....🤦🏻♂️
YES!!!!! That, or forgetting to put the Coffee in The Kurig first thing in the morning. Or, catching myself right before I forget to put The Mug under. Again, I blame that on my Coffee not kicking in yet!
I know so many people that never set their phones down and I rarely know where mine is. The goofiest for me was looking all over the house for the phone -- while talking on the phone.
I once spent half an hour looking for my phone while having a phone conversation with my mom about how I couldn't find it anywhere. Not once did she think to ask how I had managed to call her on my missing phone.
Love thus one guys!!! I told my husband I see a lot of him in this video and a lot of the two of us really. I'm trying to think of the strangest thing we found in our house I think one of the strangest ones we found is a soup spoon in the top drawer of our desk in our living room. Neither one of us could figure out how it had gotten there but it had been there for a while and that same spoon is currently missing.
I locked my keys in the trunk of my car at the beach. After frantically searching for an hour, a kind stranger used tools to dismantle the back seat so my son could crawl into the trunk to find them. That guy was my hero!
That is nothing I can't top. My father once was frantically looking for his keys so he could got to work and looking everywhere except for in his left hand ( where he was holding onto his keys the whole time. )
I just lost yet another job on April 19th 2024 die to my ADHD. I'm good with sales generally, until I decided to go into life insurance sales. For some reason, I couldn't get my close rate to the required 20% for whatever reason. I am trying not to be super hard on myself..but it's hard not too. To me, it's like employers do not care about those of us who are neurodivergent. I wish they did then I would not lose my job as much. Please pray that I can find a new job before my thousand bank balance is at zero or in the negative is the next few weeks. I've been frantically looking since Monday. Including using staffing agencies.
I have ADHD and Narcolepsy. So, ya know how you get "stupid" when you're sleepy and you can't form a thought? That's my life 24/7...... with ADHD to complicate the issue. Please pray for my husband 🙏😂
#relatable As a lifelong ADD superhero, I am amazed at how I even survived early adulthood. Also: when I did the Landmark Forum and other work to clear trauma, my ADD improved significantly! I also learned different systems that support the ADD brain. Structure and simplicity are lifesavers!
I never comment, but when Kim started shutting all the cupboard after Penn I had to stop the video and comment. 🤣🤣 My husband also had ADHD and I send all of Penn's video about the subject to my husband. My husband also leaves every cupboard open. It is honestly one of my biggest pet peeves. We also installed a tracker for the TV remote because it has it's home location, but between my husband and 9 year old ADHD daughter it is lost.
Your channel is my new favorite. You make me laugh and are genuine and so fun. Plus my husband was diagnosed with ADHD almost two years ago so you guys being open about that, really helps us. We don't feel alone with it and can smile about it more. Plus he realized it's not as bad as Pen's so that made him feel better. Love you guys
These ADHD videos have made me realize my husband and I are both ADHD. Seriously. True story: my husband had to rescue me because I left the keys on the front seat of my son's car. ( I have blue tooth so wasn't used to carrying keys). Trying to rein in his exasperation he very calmly asked how this could happen, especially considering our vehicles have no lock mechanisms when the key is inside. I shrugged because I had no defence or clue. In smoldering frustration, he went outside to retrieve the keys. When he returned 5 min. later, he had locked His keys in His vehicle. You can't make this stuff up folks ....This is my first comment on your site but I just wanna say your family has gotten me through COVID. I just discovered your pod casts. I have started listening from the first one. On episode 3 next. So fun, relatable and real. I was singing the TV. theme songs with Penn. Turns out I knew every lyric. 🙄Your ADHD videos validate my soul. 😅
I want to thank you for the great ADHD videos. My teen son has ADHD and is still figuring it out. I love that you emphasize the positive parts that come with this. Thank you!!
OMG this killed me!😂 i have the worst adhd brain, my husband's biggest pet peeve is the fact that i will go in the kitchen and by the time i leave every cupboard, and drawer, the microwave, and both pantries doors will be open, drives him crazy, he'll ask me why on earth i open everything and why can't i menage to close things! Adhd brain! My daughter had a good laugh at me tonight, we went to get a snack and in the 5 minutes we were in the kitchen i somehow lost one of my socks, i had 1 sock on when i came downstairs with 2, she asked me what happened to my other one and i literally couldn't remember, we looked everywhere and she ended up finding it in the washer, i have no idea why i put 1 of my socks in the washer and left the other one on my foot. I get distracted too easily
Whenever I set something important down somewhere other than its home spot, I have to say where it is at least 3 times out loud to help me remember. Sometimes it's like I can't finish a train of thought to save my life. 🙃
ADHD: I don't have my ducks in a row. I have squirrels and they are having a rave.
Literally😂
Hahaha
I want this on a T shirt!!!
My squirrels are driving me NUTS.
Love this lol, hubby, son and I all have ADHD/ADD and or other mental health stuff that has some very similar symptoms lol.... We actually say "Squirrel" to each other if we notice one of us is getting side tracked. As for keys, that's why all of us have either a lanyard or wristlet they go on, which we'd keep on while out and about, and a place near the door where we're supposed to always hang em when we get in, but squirrel 🐿️ lol
My favorite adult ADHD moment was losing my wallet and keys one morning. I was watching a webinar and couldn't find them when it was time to leave for work. I found them 2 days later, under my large wave ergomic keyboard. That's right, I accidentally set the keyboard over them, while watching a webinar on (. . .wait for it. . .) getting organized with ADHD.
I have tiles on everything. My keys. My vape. My medicine. I can use any one of those items to find my phone. Invest in them. They have been a life changer.
Sounds about right for ADHD. I used to mid place my keys all the time and call my parents crying because I’m trying to leave for school. 9/10 times they were in the place I always keep my keys and I totally missed them. One other time I lost my college student ID and you need that to open your dorm building door (its one of those things you see at a hotel to get in your room) and so for a couple days my roommate had to let me in the building.
😆😆😆😆😆😆 OH MY GOSH !!!! I've always said that I'm MORE ORGANIZED in my DISORGANIZED MESS !! 😆😆😂🤣.. 😖☹️😫😫😫
When you have ADHD, hear him explain "the refrigerator one" and you're like "yup. make sense to me" just to see her reaction and realized you're not "supposed" to think it make sense.
I was once using the toilet and I realised I needed a shower, so I got undressed while sitting there. I remembered to take my shirt to the dirty clothes basket but forgot my pants. I was in the shower and my wife came into the bathroom and asked, "Why are your pants perfectly gathered in front of the toilet like you just got raptured in the middle of a shit?"
@@jamesdominguez7685 I am laughing so hard at this! Your wife is hilarious!
seems logical to me? lol
The thing about pants is that they are foldable, so when I do things like that I remember I can just fold it over my arm so I only need to make on trip 😆
I just realized after 37 years of marriage that my husband constantly leaving cabinet doors standing wide open is simply a symptom of his ADHD (which he was diagnosed with some 25 years ago.) This particular behavior had puzzled me for years. Thanks Penn and Kim!
Socks. Socks everywhere. In every corner where two walls meet and on completely random surfaces. Dirty socks BESIDE the laundry hamper.
this
Makes
Sense
The train of thought with the pants by the fridge is so relatable lol. I feel seen.
I once went to get a glass of water, and in doing so realized that there were dishes that needed to be put in the dishwasher from last night. There was a paper towel left on one of the plates so I went to throw it away, realized that the trash needed to be taken out, and decided to get the trash in my bedroom as well since I'm terrible about taking it out before it's overflowing (thankfully it's never anything that can rot). While I was getting the trash from my room I remembered that I had to take a piece of mail out to the mailbox, so I figured I would do that while I was taking the trash out. I wasn't wearing socks at the time, so I went to put some on and grab my shoes. I didn't have any clean socks in my drawer, but it reminded me that I had left my laundry in the dryer. So I went downstairs to bring the laundry up so I would have socks to wear. I brought the laundry up, and that was that. Nothing else got done except throwing away the paper towel, and I never got my glass of water.
So to recap:
- did't get a glass of water (the entire point of this adventure)
- didn't put the dishes in the dishwasher
- threw away the paper towel (success?)
- didn't take the trash out
- didn't bring the mail out to the mailbox
- brought the laundry upstairs (success?)
Reminds me of a comment that I read on a Facebook post about forgetful children. It said (more or less) "Yes, children do need discipline and guidance, but good grief, how many adults have bad days or forget their stuff on a regular basis."
My ADHD was seriously stressing me out yesterday, and then this morning I woke to this. Thank you. I've only been diagnosed for a few months and your ADHD videos are something I revisit often when I need to laugh about it. So, yeah, just thank you. 😊
Check out the @HowToADHD channel
Same with me I’ve had tests in 3 days... Math.
Math stressed me out and I also have adhd so a lot of math things are hard. I’m just a fiddler so I fidget a lot in class. It’s hard for me
@@hettie3331 same experience with maths. You made me feel less alone and stupid 😂
My nephew has ADHD and is learning to deal with it and we were so excited to see Penn with the ADHD shirt that says ‘ADHD is Awesome’ that we bought one for him. Thanks for spotlighting it into a positive not a negative!
The Holderness Family is *AMAZING* ! I love that they break stigma surrounding ADHD!
I once left my groceries in my trunk cause I forgot I went grocery shopping on the way home from the grocery store. Yeah...ADHD.
Oh man.
Me too.
I have totally done this (multiple times).
Yep I’ve 100% done that
I totally fid that. 200 bucks in food destroyed
You left your keys at the beach? Reminds me of the time I left my purse in the grocery cart in front of the store and didn't realize it until I got home. It was still there when I went back which was a miracle. lol I also threw my keys away while taking the garbage out once. didn't realize it until AFTER the garbage man came... so that was great. Right now I am missing my mail key... so I cant get my mail until my husband is home. Not sure when I will get around to getting a new one, probably never.
I had to use an electric scooter at the store because of a knee problem and I left my purse in it when I gave it to an elderly lady when I was leaving... it had my keys in it or I'd have gone home none the wiser and my roommate had to run around the store (the employees not willing ot help) to find the lady.
Oh God I Did that!, OnCe Ppl,lal, ok twice, but I realized befor leaving the parking lot!
Did you check your mailbox lock? I've done that before. It's always fun when a neighbor drops by to deliver keys left in a random lock.
I once found someone's wallet in a cart when I was putting mine back. It freaked me out!!! I grabbed it and ran back in the store with it so I could find a manager to help me try to find identification for who it belonged to. I didn't think it was safe for myself or the wallet owner to go through it alone. We couldn't find a driver's license, but we were able to find credit cards with the last name and a work ID with the first name. We called the employer and they were able to get in touch with the wallet owner, so thankfully there is a happy ending. The wallet was put into the safe in the Manager's office once we got to the bottom of who it belonged to, and she was able to safely retrieve it from the store. I had wanted to hang around to see her feeling relieved but I was pregnant at the time and needed to rest after all that excitement. Thankfully I left my phone number asking for an update because I was so freaked out over this and both she and the manager called me to let me know that she got her wallet back safe and sound.
Yeah, I feel ya. My iPhone went in the dumpster too 😂😂
The lyrics Penn comes out with is amazing. This song parody is awesome😂
😄
IKR? I have tried writing parody lyrics and it's really hard. I Newberry finish the snooker song. (I left those autofills in because they're funny. "I never finish the whole song" was what I was trying to type.)
I have what I call wtf brain hour where I walk around the house checking that I haven't left everywhere and the fridge open etc. It's been a lifesaver because it doesn't build up if I do it often
I'm the last one to go to sleep in my house, so part of my bedtime routine is making sure everything is closed and the doors are locked.
🤚
I actually have an "inbox" in each room where I can set things down. So if I lose something, I can check them first and clear them out each night. I also have a charging station for electronics and a designated work bag location, I place my things directly in front of the door, and I have a magnet on the door to put up notes for major reminders.
I love the inbox idea. I'm in a shared place rn so only have my bedroom and kitchen but when I have more space I might do this
That's actually a great life hack!
Not only do I have ADHD, but two of my boys do as well. I totally identify with stopping in the middle of a task to “quickly” do this other thing and then hours later remember I never finished the first task! But even with my tendency to misplace things, I also feel Kim’s pain of finding things in really weird places because my boys will pick something up to fiddle with while moving through the house and then absently drop it somewhere without even realizing they had picked it up in the first place! I can’t tell you how many times over the years I’ve exclaimed, “Why is X in the...never mind, I know why. SMH”, LOL!
He leaves things on top of high places because he's tall and they're readily available. The spaces are available because she's shorter and probably doesn't store things where she can't easily reach them.
My entire family has ADHD. On the plus side, you have a lot of fun adventures. On the minus side, it is really frustrating to watch everyone else's families function as expected while yours runs around like the Keystone Cops.
As a child and the best hyper-focuser, I compensated for my scattered parents and siblings by obsessively watching the clock and making lists in hopes of organizing everyone. My dad learned to tell the family we had to be somewhere 1 1/2 hours before an event really started so we'd have a prayer of being on time. We were typically 20 minutes late to everything despite that.
We always joked we'd be late to our own funerals, and my brother actually was -- because we arrived late to the memorial with his ashes.
As the wife and mother of ADHD folks, there are plenty of days I want to kill them all because every door and drawer is standing open, nobody can find anything because every storage and horizontal space looks like a junk drawer, and it's utter chaos. Then I can't find my own shoes and I've half-completed six tasks in six different rooms, and I remember why we're in this literal mess. We are great at setting up organizational structures; they last three weeks before mass ADHD defeats them, we decide the structure is the problem so we reinvent the wheel by devising a new system. Lather, rinse, repeat.
@@SouthCountyGal I've heard the HowToADHD channel is super helpful for making a reasonable system. :)
@@hollyl5702 I love that channel!
This may explain why the librarians look at me like I’m crazy when I tell them lost books can be found in the most unlikely places. (As in, yes, I did return the book, and you need to look under things whether you think it’s likely it’ll be there.)
I heard an idea new song while you were talking. "I Found My Keys in Strange Places", parody obviously of "I Got Friends in Low Places"
I have left my house keys in my entry door countless times. When I lose them, that's one of my first go-to spots on my backtracking list.
😂 once I was trying to do my math homework and I ended up writing a parody called I am never ever gonna, need algebra of we are never ever ever getting back together about how I won’t use algebra in real life
I respect how Penn honors his ADHD🙌
Me too! it helps me accept mine.
The first time I left my husband home with the kiddos for any prolonged period of time was when I flew to stay with my sister and help out with her newborn. That first night I called the kids, told them goodnight... got ANOTHER call an hour later, thought it was husband telling me how much he missed me- nope. "Honey? I can't find my keys anywhere. I think I lost them." Mind you, I'm 2,000 miles away at this point. (Spoiler alert: They were in the fridge.)
Omg 😂
Lmaooooooo
I ADHD-skimmed this and legit thought that the kids were in the fridge and checked the comments to see who had shamed you. Saw no shame and re-skimmed this. Thank God it was the keys 😅
My ADHD screams - I need a Kim! While I'm trying to be Kim (shiny... squirrel...oh follow the trail of open things!) for my family - oh man do I feel you with those doors, drawers, and socks!
I've done that but with a phone, not a cell phone, but the remote ones that are bulky and have a charging station. You know the one's that always use in '90s movies. Kinda hard to miss when it's sitting next to a carton of milk.
I just found your videos. These are great!
I dont have the being messy problem. I have developed a set of routines that help me keep up with things. For example, I keep my water cup in only one of 3 places. My keys always go on my desk. My phone is either on my desk, my pocket or in the car.
My routine when i walk out the door is to count, 1, 2, 3. I make sure I have 3 items....my keys, wallet, phone.
I always make a list if there are more than 3 items to remember.
Routines are very important to help ground me. They are a baseline. Then I can add temporary tasks to them. As long as the routines are completed, I'm not so distracted during the day.
At work I do multiple things at the same time because my brain is moving faster than the computer.
Oof, I'm Autistic, and the executive dysfunction feels are so, so real. Thank you for this
I need to find a better way of explaining it to people. Otherwise, they seem to think all will be well if I'm given a planner. Sigh.
@@jeffreym68 as if none of us had ever thought of this. Sigh
@@susanwilliams2392 I know, right! 😑
Jessica from “How to ADHD”needs to do a video with Penn 🧠 and Kim 💜. That would be AWESOMENESS!!!
No, idea what the topic or song would be. There could be numerous ones. Whatever it is, it would be soo cool.
YES! Awesome idea!!!
Agreed!!
THIS!
Would love to see it!
Squirrel also equals "oooh shiny!" Why do people try to talk to me when there is so much stimuli around?? And.. Uh. Lost my train of thought 🤭
I'm also hard of hearing and between the "Ooh, shiny! and "Huh? What did you say?" it takes the patience of a saint for my husband to have a conversation with me.
Or start talking to you before they have your attention and then get mad because you came into the conversation late and didn't hear a thing they said prior to that point?
I love that someone explains ADHD for us. I am ADHD and squirrel.
Lol same
@Vince Laurence Macalanda
Perhaps it's your brain back lashing against the cancellation of Pepi Le Pew?
@@scotttovey don't get me started. Pepe le pew is my favorite! Canceling him is like canceling me.
@@janybelleoftheclanbell8752 😎👍
Imagine being the wife/mom with ADHD taking care of the family, the dogs, the house AND homeschooling. Life is ironic. 👍
Kara, I feel this comment so much! Cheers to you! I was SO happy when schools opened and I could send my 9 yr old son (also with ADHD) back!
Preach!
same.. props to us moms
Kim's a saint. Also, anyone else who has to do all that stuff is a saint.
That’s me! Always an adventure!
I love that you are so open and honest about having ADHD. But I would really like to see more from Kim about how she handles it.
My husbamd has ADHD, and it's hard on both of us. The stress of living with people with ADHD is huge.
I would love you guys to do a video on 10 ways to survive your partner's ADHD, similar to your 10 ADHD lifehacks.
Tip one: The person with ADHD doesn't get to use it as a get-outta-jail- free card and owns their stuff.
Tip Two: find a medication regime that works for Both of You.
Been with my ADHD and wonderful husband for 20 years. From the beginning I demanded a say-so in the meds. I have to live with the results, too. There have been 2 meds that he was on that I vetoed the hell out of because one made him a monster, the other a comatose couch potato. Both meds were his favorite when he took each of them. Either would have made him a single man. Sometimes a good medication, that we both like, stops working. I HATE that because it is always me who notices first and has to have the "something is going on with your meds" conversation, the immediate reply is Always, "Nuh-Uh!" (just a knee-jerk denial) and the month that follows where I have to point out what each example of non-normal behavior is and explain how it affects our lives...Then he'll ask the doctor about it. I've likened it to riding a merry-go-round that never stops. But then again, I'm getting to ride it with my best friend.
From the perspective of a spouse with ADHD I can share things that have helped my husband and I....
1. Work together to build systems that reduce stress and chaos. One example is that we have a bowl or hook right at the door where keys go as soon as we come in the house. It's convenient, it's visible, it's consistent, and it has drastically reduced the number of times the keys get lost. It won't solve it 100%, but it reduces it. Another example of this is putting a laundry hamper wherever your spouse bus most likely to get changed so putting clothes in it is easy and natural. Also, make putting away laundry as simple and streamlined as possible. So unless they love crazy socks like I do, get the same two or three kinds of socks and just throw them all in a drawer or basket instead of pairing them. For underwear, just throw them in a drawer or basket rather than trying to make them folded and tidy. I have found I do better hanging a vast majority of my clothes now that I have the closet space to do so because then I don't have to fold and I can see more of my clothes when I am trying to find them. These kinds of systems vary, but the easier and more natural it is for things to land where they should be, the less stress there is.
2. Build routines together. Routines for things like getting dressed, showering, brushing teeth, and day to day responsibilities are so helpful to my ADHD brain. Routines reduce the amount of executive function I need to get things done and my husband helped me figure out what routines I needed and what to include in them. And if I get off track in a routine he can often just ask questions (Are your clothes ready? Did you pack your lunch?) And that is often all I need to get back on track.
3. Understand that an organized person with ADHD looks different than a neurotypical organized person and try to be ok with that. If need be, set boundaries on spaces so your space can be organized your way and their space can be organized their way and shared space find compromises that you both can work with. For ADHD brains, the more steps to make sure that something ends up in the right place, the less likely it is to end up there so using methods like baskets or clear boxes can be super helpful.
4. When it comes to chores and adult responsibilities, don't be afraid to try dividing tasks in different ways to figure out what works. My husband is super good at cleaning and cooking. I suck at those tasks but he isn't very good at managing our finances or getting some of the yard work done and I am pretty good at those things. Some things we share like shopping (I am great at getting things we can order online but grocery stores are my kryptonite). This doesn't mean that I never clean or cook or go to a grocery store, but they aren't my primary responsibilities.
5. Lists! Checklists and packing lists and grocery lists and calendars are so helpful! If I have a list it's easier for me to stay on track.
Everyone is different, but those are some things that have helped me and my husband reduce the chaos that is me and my ADHD brain.
We all have ADD/ADHD at our house. Medication helps us tremendously, so does meditation, and so does swimming. My son is on a swim team, he swims two hours a day, his symptoms virtually disappear when he swims everyday. But if he ever takes a break from swimming for more than a few days his symptoms start to come back.
Leave him
I agree with the others, it’s all about finding a system that works. And realizing that his ideal system is going to look different than your ideal system. Since he’s currently the stay at home parent, I defer to his “methods” of organization, even if they don’t make sense to me. But I still have control over certain small areas of the house that he doesn’t have to interact with daily. Having those areas organized in my way gives my brain the ability to function properly too.
I also echo the medication/exercise part. When we first married he worked 50 hrs a week in a warehouse and his symptoms were well controlled, but when he quit to stay home he needed to go on medication. We got lucky and the first one worked well, but he has to be strict with the time of day he takes it. Not a hardship, but something we had to learn through trial and error.
I’ve never been diagnosed with adhd, but I relate a little too much to Penn right now.
@1:50 "... I see it through the window and ... SQUIRREL!" OMG I lose it laughing every time I watch this! LOVE you guys and this channel!
My wife and I currently have 16 Tiles between us. If you lose something important, you stick a Tile to it. We still lose the remotes to our TVs almost every day though.
Our first date was at a local dive bar and when she showed up without her ID, I though it was an attempt to get out of the date early. Nope. She just can't keep track of her driver's license.
I just love all your videos, but this one hits home. At 56 years old I just got diagnosed with ADHD. I have been a minimalist because it helps me keep things organized when there’s not so much stuff to lose. Having a place for everything helps, but there are still many ADHD moments. Penn, have you ever tried Tile? It’s a little tag you can put on your keychain that lets you find he location, much like “find my iPhone”. Providing you can find your phone to locate your keys 😄 Please keep up the videos. They are balm to our frazzled minds!
The amount of times I have had to say “I’m sorry my brain doesn’t work like yours. Yours works like this -- mine works like this ~~~.” because I have ADHD haha.
It's the same with us with autism.
OMG I love that explanation! I have to tell neurotypical people "your thoughts run in a straight line, mine look like the flying spaghetti monster! :) " People seem to "get" that
Kim, I understand. I am married to a man who's brain is similar. And oh yeah, "squirrel". Year 33 of our adventure! 😊
You bring up a good point! While I don't have ADHD I have something that makes my brain works similarly and my husband has ADHD Tendencies as well it makes life in our house a little interesting sometimes. :-)
I am the one with ADHD, not the hubby, but I spend half my life looking for things he can't find. Life hack--get an awesome key rack and keep it by whichever door Penn goes thru most (garage?) It has literally saved me HOURS of looking for our keys. Now if I could only find a similar hack for the remote!
First off, wonderful video. This is normally where I would write something incisive for a chuckle. While I cannot immediately identify with Penn's travails as detailed in the video (I've trained myself to double-check for my keys), I have my own troubling way of undoing all that I've worked for. At least Penn has a loving family as part of his support. This makes him a very fortunate individual.
As I was listening to Penn’s story about the pants in front of the fridge, I saw the logic in every step. Regarding keys, I totally understand that. Sometimes, it is just a matter of forgetting to finish the process of removing the keys from the ignition. My mom, who also has ADHD, managed to leave her keys in the ignition, engine on, locked in the car, for the entirety of Titanic when we went to see it at the movie theatre. She’d simply gotten distracted and forgotten to take the keys out.
Everyone has that duh moment where they lay something down or forget to finish a task. We say "oh I was tired", or "Had to stop doing that to go do.... because ...."
I refer to the ADHD brain as trigger happy. ADHD people are so smart! The thoughts form normally, but then the ADHD brain shoots those thoughts full of holes, while running on a hamster wheel, juggling, and considering their 401k investment plan, at the same time. The swiss cheese thoughts sometimes just lay there as a result.
I don't have a key fob, so the only way I can lock my keys in the car is if I press the lock button on the inside of the door while the door is open and then get out and close the door.
That being said, I've locked my mom's keys in her car before. Thankfully we were close enough to home that she could walk back and get the spare, but it was still a good 5 miles when it was all said and done.
I haven't left my keys in the car recently (see, hear, AND feel the keys before I close that door!) but I do have a key fob. (I wear that around my neck on a lanyard.) I got out of the car at the post office one day to mail a letter; the truck had just pulled up so I was in a hurry to get the mail in the box.
I got back in the car to find -- yup! I'd forgotten to shut the car off.
I have a lot of routines that non-ADHD'ers would find very strange, like the keys one I just mentioned. I keep having to come up with new ones . . .
I know I've said it before, but it's reassuring how you always make my ADHD husband and I feel very seen. Thank you so much.
I spent nearly an hour searching for my eyeglasses on Friday. The were on my face. I'm nearly blind without them and it never clicked that I was seeing things clearly while looking for my glasses. Oh well...
HAHAHA the same thing happened to me with my glasses.
I can't watch this without crying, because I couldn't live like that anymore. "I'm my own worst enemy" is spot on. Concerta is my best friend, after my wife. Kim and Penn - you are both brilliant, wonderful, saints. Thank you for sharing your creativity, music, and lives to make the world a brighter place.
My Hubby's got ADD (no H) and I could so relate to this video...especially the kitchen cupboards. The other night (we have our own bedrooms) I was looking for my remote to turn off the tv and I had to get up and go to his room and ask if he happened to put it in his housecoat pocket. That's typical around here. Nope, it wasn't it in his pocket so he helped me strip my bed to look for it. As he was picking up a pillow something fell out of the front of his housecoat. Of course it was my remote. "It wasn't in my pocket" was his reply. It's a good thing my Hubby is cute.
How can Kim find things on top of things that Penn can't see? She's like a foot shorter than him.
She's a saint...then again most wives are.
Didn't you know that vaginas are equipped with homing devices? 😂
I'd say: because she knows him.
From a wife with a taller husband.
@@creattiva90 Not doubting that. But does she carry a stepladder with her or one of those mirrors on a stick things? Just talking about the physical line of sight issue.
or a demon
@@danlmarlow5446 what
Lol. Funny thing is, I'm the spouse with ADHD, but I'm still the one picking up after everyone else. Mind you, my house is a mess all the time, because I'm not the best house keeper, or the most organized by far, but I am the one picking up after everyone else.
Me too! I should've taught the kids to find my sunglasses 😎.
OMG. ME TOO!! My husband is SO frustrated at me, yet I walk around ALL day picking up stuff. House is still ALWAYS a disaster!!! (PS. As a school project in French, my kids had to name the “most organized” family member, and (bless her heart) my daughter said, “Mom”!! Because despite my scatter brain... if I weren’t here, the kids wouldn’t have a clean article of clothing or ever eat home-cooked meals.)
There’s a bitter laugh that no matter what the skills of family members, it’s the mom and the daughters who are supposed to keep the guys clean, fed and organized
Got my ADHD assessment a week tomorrow! Thanks for being open about your experiences its so great not to feel alone :)
I’ve lost my keys on a photo shoot in a forest and never recovered them.
I’ve left my coffee in my kid’s closet... my ID/Debit card in a laundry basket... I forget to set alarms when I’m cooking and burn ish all the time... I swear Penn, you make songs for my brain.
I have to ask exactly how did you manage to leave your coffee in your kid’s closet what was the reason that you left it their and was it a cup of brewed coffee or the coffee grounds as I can’t think of any reason why you would leave a cup of brewed coffee in your kids closet but then again I don’t know why you would put the coffee grounds their either
It's never dull, that's for sure! Once on a weekend trip, we got to our destination and realized my son had no shoes. Not his extra shoes... NONE of his shoes. Yep, he was barefoot and had zero shoes. We asked him and he said, "oh, I thought you had them."
This is hilarious!! My nephew showed up at my parents (4 hours from their house) without a coat. Dead winter! No coat. “I thought it was in the car.”
@@mykijiji1958so I am assuming that the last time that he took said coat off he thought he did so while in the car when the last time he took it off was actually inside the house or something
I just gotta say I have a 14 yo nephew with adhd and everytime you pay one of these songs I said it to him too let him know he's not alone!
Thanks to your videos, I have come to understand why I've always been so forgetful and can't finish tasks. I've always been very hard on myself, thinking I was just lazy and had bad time management skills. I just want to say thank you for sharing your experiences. I'm finally able to understand what's going on with my brain and work with it instead of against it. I'm much happier and more content with life now, and I have you guys to thank for it!
Haha... Soo Penn I'm ADHD and my husband is ADHD inatentive with no short term working memory... I have to put things in the same spot or I can't find them! (He's resisting all the systems I've set up 😆) but I legit have a basket for masks, keys and things I need when I leave the house u just dump it in your bag and go... But it's now in a construction zone Soo just this past week I lost keys 3 times, broke prescription sunglasses, and replaced a phone.
i love how his wife is so supportive of his silliness to participate in these videos. They make a great team. whenever I sing or have moments of inspired silliness (at least I think so haha) it will be met with disapproving sighs or condescending comments, or a friendly invitation to "grow up"
I'm not sure if I have it but I spend soo much time looking for things and seeing half-finished chores while thinking 'oh yeah... I still need to finish that'
I have ADD. At times I'm experiencing the same things but my brain seems to rev up by the minute. Makes perfect sense to leave cabinets and refrigerator doors open while cooking to get out ingredients but wash every dirty plate, cup, bowl, or measuring spoon as soon as it touches something. I've put scissors in the fridge. I left a plate of food in the bathroom. Guinea pig in a kitchen chair. My skill at balanced stacking of random objects should make me a Jenga champion.
I get ADD my son has it. He doesn’t have the H though. He has learned how to work with it sometimes unless he’s stressed. Then it gets a little hectic. He’s 34 and in the army 🇺🇸 💚. He has to make it work. Penn you get frustrated with yourself? Have you learned coping mechanisms?
Thank you so much for helping to keep this sunny, I'm remembering the time I froze my credit card in a container of ice to stop impulse spending, forgot I had done this and pretty much forgot about the credit card, and then when we were moving, asked my sister to clean out the fridge, defrost the freezer etc. The credit card went out with the trash and, weeks later when I needed the card, we pieced together what had happened and I called to cancel it. Also, I locked my keys in the car with the car running the morning of my Dad's funeral. I was very lucky to be in Mom's driveway when it happened and she had an extra set of my car keys in her house :)
this song really speaks to me. as someone who has literalyl left the tv remote AND her landline (tho wireless) phone *in the freezer*, i can't believe i wasn't diagnosed with adhd until last week.
OMG… I can SO relate. When my best friend and I started our business, my daughter was about 2. She fell asleep in our back office (highly unusual), and I was having a rather hectic time dealing with member behaviors and a changed routine that day. Got everyone ready to go on route to do home drop-offs, got into the van, and started driving. My best friend was still working her job and called me on her ride home and we chatted as I drove. We finished, I hung up the phone, and as I was ten minutes out of town it dawned on me: I FORGOT MY 2-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER AT THE BUILDING ALL ALONE! Immediately called my friend back and told her to stop at the building and why. We so laugh about it now as I get ready to send that same daughter (also diagnosed with ADHD…) off to college.🤣🤪🤣🤪
This is great! You chose one of my favorite songs!!
Also happy late bday Kim!!🎁🎂🎈
I have 3 Tiles. One for my keys, one for my purse and one that hangs on a hook behind the front door and DOES NOT COME OFF THE HOOK. That way I can press the Tile and at least find my phone and then find all the other things with the phone on the Tile app. It's the best I can do some days.
I have ADHD and my fiance is autistic... we eventually find almost everything we misplace but it takes a lot longer and our methods are slightly different from how neurotypical people would find stuff. Also we kind of have to gently nudge each other to pick up or things would never get done. He reminds me of all the things I started and stopped so I get back to them and helps me with my decision making paralysis and I help encourage him to start stuff and help him with his decision making paralysis. Balance... or as much of it as we can get.
I hear you. My partner was my nudge, and died last year. I hadn't realized how much less functional I am without someone in that role.
@@jeffreym68 I'm sorry for your loss. And I can understand not realizing how much less functional you are without your partner. I know it's not exactly the same because my fiance hasn't passed but he lives in Canada and I live in the US so we've been apart since before covid. We do video chat daily and they help but we've both been doing a lot worse without being able to see each other. I hope things get better for you and that you're able to find peace and happiness and someone or something to give you the nudge you need.
@@danidynamite2 Thank you. It must be hard for you as well being so distant in such difficult times. I hope you can be together soon.
It's been a process of learning where my limits are and how far I can push them, plus finding ways to get nudges elsewhere. I suspect that at this point, I really can't live alone anymore, but the next steps are difficult ones.
Please Keep it coming with the ADHD videos!!! I have 2 in the family and until ur videos they viewed it as a curse.. Now they thinks its funny, and quirky.. Not quite to the "super power" point yet.. But a few more encouraging videos from you guys and who knows?! 😍 ps.. Tips from Kim would be great..I'm going nuts trying to help "without helping"...🤪
Heyy i think this song is really good yay very good
also Happy Birthday Kim
Another bullseye. :) Honestly, guys, I have to be honest - you pulled me through 2020, and are still working it. Thank you. When I think I can't deal anymore, I check to see if you have a new song. And you almost always do. And it almost always helps.
This explains my ex-wife. If I'd seen this a few years ago, maybe we'd still be married.
Wow. That's a bummer.
that’s an oof on your part
My ex-husband was an uptight, quiet accountant type. He thought my wayward 'disregard' was intentional and quite fixable. So why didn't I fix it?
Sorry, to hear this. It is very true that understanding health problems makes a huge difference. Both for people who have them, and the people around them. I spend a lot of time teaching my daughter about her ADHD, and I spend a lot of time teaching her grandparents about it too. People with ADD/ADHD don’t choose to be this way, we often try very hard not to be this way, but if we try to force ourselves to do certain things, like pay attention to something we are struggling to pay attention to, it often makes it much worse. Imagine trying to force your self to overcome cold or flu symptoms, you can’t, and if you try to force yourself to do things, while you are sick that you just don’t feel good enough to do, you make it worse, much worse. ADHD is an illness just like the flu is an illness, except it never really goes away. We do need to learn how to manage our symptoms, and an important part of managing our symptoms is knowing what they are and why we have them. Just like understanding cold or flu symptoms in an important part of managing them. Once we know something is a symptom and not a personal choice or a personality trait, we can stop blaming ourselves, and being hard on ourselves for it, and we can seek out legitimate solutions. Just like it would be bad if we blamed ourselves for coughing, but we don’t because we understand coughing is a symptom we don’t choose to have and we can’t will it to go away. It is hugely helpful when others understand what we are going through and why we do the things we do. Compassion and understanding go a long way, they are even more important and helpful than medications, although medications can be hugely helpful too. There is no way I can do my job or my chores without my medications, they have been life changing for me. This is exactly why there are awareness campaigns for so many illnesses. People need to be understood and they need compassion concerning their problems. I do hope that this will encourage you to learn more about ADD/ADHD, and I hope that this can help you have a better relationship with your ex, especially if the two of you share children, and if you are still in contact with one another.
4 hours and i think for sure.
This is all i can endure
Lunch is incomplete
I forgot to eat
Im so befuddled
My thoughts obscured
Then when, i get engrossed
In writing song lyrics on a TH-cam post
This is not constructive or what i had planned
But now i gotta finnish
Or give up the ghost...
My whole damb brain is just so obsessed.
It cant be suppressed
So just make the best!
getting distracted
Tasks are impacted
Still need to eat
It's making me stressed
And i still havent done the laundry
And i haven't drunk my tea...
Nothing progresses but the messes
The hunger and glee...
Groan. A. D.H.D
This is not me but it's my mom who I inherited ADHD from... We were on vacation many years ago and we took our camper. And we got to the site and it's a pop-up camper so you you know disconnected from your car and then it has a little lifting mechanism that you know opens it up and shoots out the beds and the door falls and place and you click a bunch of little things and all together. Afterwards we are you know settling in and my mom starts freaking out and she can't find her purse anywhere. We search the vehicle high and low everywhere could not find the purse. We searched inside the camper high and low my mom's freaking out! My dad is outside taking pictures vacation that kind of thing and he calls my mom out. She's still freaking out he says here look through the lens and look at look up there so my mom's just grabs the camera and looks through the site and he says no no look here and points in the direction she needs to look. And their sits my mom's purse on top of the camper about 30 ft in the air! Lol! So we have to lower the camper to get the purse down. So I come by ADHD very honestly definitely inherited.
Oh! And we have a picture of my mom's purse sitting on top of the camper! It's like my favorite picture we have ever taken in our family! Lol!
I see here you have, you know, absolutely used the wonderful friend to all ADHD ers and you have, you know, written this comment out in voice text :-) you know
KIM! Omg I almost couldn't make it through this video I identified so hard with your plight!! My husband is the same way! Not about keys, but about half-doing things... Or it not occurring to him to finish things - the dishes, picking up his trash, putting laundry away, etc etc etc... I feel ya, lady friend!
I keep losing my phone. I set it somewhere in the house to do something and then later wonder where my phone is located.
At least once a day i hear my roommate ask "hey google, where's my phone?"
Try, "Hey google," phone beep, "sing me a song."(Requires voice recognition setup.) Or just have someone call.
Need to figure out one for apple iphone for my mom. We lose our phones often. (Tempted to get square or tile. But we'd probably forget to change the batteries.)
@@lisapham4443 iPhone. Hey Siri, play (insert artist or song here)
"Squirrel" reminds me so much of my son!
Before I started working from home, I used to spend parts of my day looking for my keys, phone, &/or sunglasses
Occasionally I get up in the morning, can't find my car keys,. Then I find them hanging in the back door, unfortunately on the outside, but hey, that's like leaving your car keys in the ignition with the windows down, really makes people question if it's a trap
ADHD, Autism, Asperger's and any other disability is God's why of giving u all super powers💖 there needs to be more knowledge, understanding and help out there for anyone who is struggling with any sort of disability 🤔 thank u for this video Penn And Kim 📹👌
Love you guys 💕💖
I have to respectfully disagree. Invisible disabilities suck. At least for me they do.
@@karaa7595 I'm sorry to hear that😢. My youngest has Asperger's and finds it hard at times. More awareness and help needed out there that's for sure. Xx
I agree 100%!! I have two boys on the spectrum and myself have ADD. I have been a single mom for the last twenty years and my sons are in their twenties now. It is not always easy but we work together as best we can for each other.
I find that ADHD can be a gift in some ways and a curse in others.
My 28 year old has been struggling with aspergers and more public support and knowledge would be wonderful. Good for Penn teaching us about ADHD!
My mother couldn't find her keys one day and she blamed the grandkids for losing them. About 2 months later we were up at my parents other property for the weekend and my mom had brought up steaks from her freezer (important fact here) to cook on the grill. When she opened the package of steaks low and behold there sat her keys, on top of the steaks. Some how when she was packaging meat up months back her keys got put in one of the packages. We still tease her about it.
Wow their songs and parodies are amazing. How do they do it?
Bahaha I love you guys! I too have ADHD and leave my keys, bag, and now mask EVERYWHERE. I was 15min late to the gym this morning, looked in my bag 4 times, and on the 5th time they appeared. Twice I've had locksmiths out. Twice I've left them in the ignition. Fortunately there's been no travel this year so I haven't had to run for or completely miss trains or flights for awhile now!! 🤦🏻♀️😂
Love it as I learn about the ADHD I was diagnosed with as an adult!
First of all!!!! congrats on finishing this video and lyrics ect, its amazing!!!!!! All of these things, the video, everything ate perfection. So relatable, i have done them all too, i feel broken all of the time, ty for helping not feel alone and bringing the comic relief!!! 😹💕🤗 ty for being you and sharing!!!!
ADHD tip: get TILES for everything! They can go on keys in wallets, in important files/folders... They have saved us so many times!
More info please?
@@sissinoklahoma2057 Google "Tile for keys".. they even have small tabs you can put on important folders etc.. Its a Bluetooth location system..
I found a packet of cat food on the bookshelf, my notebook for one of my classes in my wardrobe, and food in the bathroom. Loved this pardoy!
Happy Late Birthday, Kim!!!
Once my husband took one of my two rings from by the sink to put somewhere safe.... We searched everywhere and eventually assumed either the kids dropped it down a vent or a great house guest wasn't so great and had stolen it. A year later while registering our son for kindergarten we found it... In the filing cabinet... With the birth certificates... He wanted to put it somewhere "safe" and never even remember doing so all the time we were searching and suspecting our poor houseguest.
Not always the husband... Just sayin’ 🙄
ADHD/ADD has its upsides too. It can be incredibly fun, unless you have responsibilities you need to pay attention to at the moments your ADD is acting up, then it’s torture. But in the moments we can let our ADD run wild it is incredibly fun and entertaining. I have not been board for decades, my brain is incredibly entertaining. People with ADHD/ADD are often incredibly creative. I was not at all surprised the guy in this video has ADHD, given how musical and creative he is with his songs and videos.
The ADD brain often gets stuck on slower brain wave frequencies, and it can be very hard for us to switch to faster or slower brainwave frequencies, unlike most people who do so easily and automatically. Think of most people’s brains as a car with automatic transitions, they can easily move from slower speeds to faster, then slower again and then even into parking. It’s so easy and automatic most people don’t even know they are doing it. Think of our ADD/ADHD brains as a manual with gear shifts that don’t work well, we try to switch gears but get stuck, and either nothing changes and we cannot speed up or slow down, which is problematic, or the car seems to fight it and suddenly jerks back and forth. It can be very painful when we try to force our brains to transition to something in order to pay attention to it.
The Slower brainwave frequencies we often get stuck in are associated with creativity, problem solving, day dreaming. Many of the world’s most creative people have ADD/ADHD. Countless artist, musicians, actors, writers, cake decorators, inventors, designers, advertisers, home builders, all sorts of people involved in movies, or plays at any level have ADD/ADHD. Countless celebrities, entertainers, professional athletes etc have ADHD/ADD. Google search celebrities with ADD and you will probably find a long list of very famous people.
We are capable of creating entire worlds in our heads, and we are very good at coming up with new ideas, or new uses for things that others would never be able to. We also have hyper focus. Which is both a blessing and a curse. Hyper focus makes us completely obsessed with things, once something gets in our heads we can’t stop thinking about it or working on a project. This is a blessing because we create amazing things and we become experts on many subjects. But it is a curse because it is very hard to stop even for food, bathrooms breaks, responsibilities that need our time and attention, or even sleep. This is part of that not being able to shift brain wave frequencies problem. You need different brainwave frequencies for focus, than you do for eating, sleeping, interruptions, boring stuff, etc. basically making any transition can be hard for us. In fact, hyper focus is why am I writing such a long detailed post right now instead of doing my house work, or helping my daughter with homework right now, like I should be.
So people think that ADD/ADHD people have a hard time focusing or paying attention, but that is only partially true. We have a very hard time focusing our attention on things that are boring, uninteresting to us, or that we don’t want to do. We cannot stop focusing on things we are passionate about, or that excite us. We often get lost in thought, sucked into video games, TV shows, social media, or lost in our creative work. So that’s why we have a hard time focusing on things like work, school, cleaning, putting things away, people talking us, etc., because our brains are so focused on whatever really interesting stuff we happen to be stuck on thinking about, dreaming up, or creating, that we cannot pay attention to the things around us or things we should be doing at the same time. And because we struggle to switch gears, so to speak, we can’t just stop what we are thinking about, pay attention to another task at hand, and later go back to what we were thinking about. It is also why we lose things, because we are not paying attention to things when we set them down or when we put them away, so we have no idea where they ended up, or where we put them, even when we purposefully put them away somewhere, we simply have no memory of where we put them. It is not because we have memory problems, it is because you cannot make a memory of something your conscious mind never saw or heard.
We do much better if we can just go at our own pace, be very go with the flow, we don’t struggle at all when when we can be like that. And we can let our creativity flow uninterrupted and we can create amazing things. But unfortunately the rest of the world works with rigid schedules, that require waking up early and easily, which we often can’t do at all, or without a painful fight. (we struggle both with falling asleep and waking up, because they both require major brain wave transitions). Many people with ADD/ADHD do well with home school or working from home, because we can design our own schedules which really helps. We also do better working with our hands, than doing book work or paper work, because when our hands are moving we can usually pay attention better. It can be next to impossible for us to force ourselves to meet strict structured schedules that most schools and businesses require, and it can be very difficult for us to do a lot of work that is not creative or hands on, it really drains our energy fast and burns us out quickly.
I almost spit out my water when he got to the part about leaving the freezer open!
Well, *I* did the spit take at SQUIRREL but have also been known to leave the freezer door open, only once overnight. Now my husband does a "Kim" and checks the house before he goes to bed.
Our freezer will beep at us if it's left open.
This has saved several freezerfuls of food from thawing out.
I adore how you show how this atypical brain configuration impact you and the ppl around you. Power to both of you. Like my colleage expect me to come back to office 2-3 times before I leave with everithing I need for my next work. Smt they also help with the stuff I miss. Like oh hey you left your phone. Work life man.
It’s a good thing he’s so cute.
Kim is gonna dislike dis comment....
FYI i meant this bc it’s seems like you ❤️ pen ...
@@bellasingh9541 I'm pretty sure she knows her husband is hot lol
@@DiegoHowl ok but if you were Kim and someone said that would YOU like it ?
@@bellasingh9541 having an issue with people saying your partner is attractive is weird and overly possessive. "This dude is hot" does not translate to "Im gonna try and get with him". My boyfriend is attractive (and completely out of my league). Anytime someone comments on his looks I'm just like "I know right? Feel free to drool with me"
Total Genius! Been watching these videos for nearly the past year. Continue to be amazed, Penn and Kim.
"Squirrel!"
Haha! Relate so much to the pants in front of the fridge story - that’s just how our brains work! It’s a super power :)
Watched this this morning and found out I had ADHD that afternoon at the doctor's
So I lose my stuff a LOT. I wound up getting a "gentlemans organizer" from Amazon. That is right by the front door. The second I enter the door, everything goes in it. Keys, wallet, watch, knife, etc. It also has deodorant in it in case I forget on my walk out lol
My biggest problem is looking for my phone. I’ll even call someone asking them to see if they know where it is!!! While I’ve had it in my hand the whole time....🤦🏻♂️
YES!!!!! That, or forgetting to put the Coffee in The Kurig first thing in the morning. Or, catching myself right before I forget to put The Mug under. Again, I blame that on my Coffee not kicking in yet!
I ping my phone (using my Apple Watch) at least ten times a day. A good portion of the time it is in my pocket or right next to me.
I know so many people that never set their phones down and I rarely know where mine is. The goofiest for me was looking all over the house for the phone -- while talking on the phone.
I once spent half an hour looking for my phone while having a phone conversation with my mom about how I couldn't find it anywhere. Not once did she think to ask how I had managed to call her on my missing phone.
Love thus one guys!!! I told my husband I see a lot of him in this video and a lot of the two of us really. I'm trying to think of the strangest thing we found in our house I think one of the strangest ones we found is a soup spoon in the top drawer of our desk in our living room. Neither one of us could figure out how it had gotten there but it had been there for a while and that same spoon is currently missing.
I locked my keys in the trunk of my car at the beach. After frantically searching for an hour, a kind stranger used tools to dismantle the back seat so my son could crawl into the trunk to find them. That guy was my hero!
That is nothing I can't top. My father once was frantically looking for his keys so he could got to work and looking everywhere except for in his left hand ( where he was holding onto his keys the whole time. )
Could u do a parody of Taylor Swift’s “You Need to Calm Down” plz?
I just lost yet another job on April 19th 2024 die to my ADHD. I'm good with sales generally, until I decided to go into life insurance sales. For some reason, I couldn't get my close rate to the required 20% for whatever reason. I am trying not to be super hard on myself..but it's hard not too. To me, it's like employers do not care about those of us who are neurodivergent. I wish they did then I would not lose my job as much. Please pray that I can find a new job before my thousand bank balance is at zero or in the negative is the next few weeks. I've been frantically looking since Monday. Including using staffing agencies.
"Squirrel"
Been there done that.. diagnosed as 46 year old.. and everything suddenly became clear..... :-) dont forget --- ADHD can be a blessing aswell ... :-)
I have ADHD and Narcolepsy. So, ya know how you get "stupid" when you're sleepy and you can't form a thought? That's my life 24/7...... with ADHD to complicate the issue. Please pray for my husband 🙏😂
My family says I’m easily distracted-I say I am multi-tasking. Maybe I’m ADHD too. Interesting. I get the squirrel thing but I also do cows.
#relatable As a lifelong ADD superhero, I am amazed at how I even survived early adulthood. Also: when I did the Landmark Forum and other work to clear trauma, my ADD improved significantly! I also learned different systems that support the ADD brain. Structure and simplicity are lifesavers!
I never comment, but when Kim started shutting all the cupboard after Penn I had to stop the video and comment. 🤣🤣 My husband also had ADHD and I send all of Penn's video about the subject to my husband. My husband also leaves every cupboard open. It is honestly one of my biggest pet peeves. We also installed a tracker for the TV remote because it has it's home location, but between my husband and 9 year old ADHD daughter it is lost.
Your channel is my new favorite. You make me laugh and are genuine and so fun. Plus my husband was diagnosed with ADHD almost two years ago so you guys being open about that, really helps us. We don't feel alone with it and can smile about it more. Plus he realized it's not as bad as Pen's so that made him feel better. Love you guys
These ADHD videos have made me realize my husband and I are both ADHD. Seriously. True story: my husband had to rescue me because I left the keys on the front seat of my son's car. ( I have blue tooth so wasn't used to carrying keys). Trying to rein in his exasperation he very calmly asked how this could happen, especially considering our vehicles have no lock mechanisms when the key is inside. I shrugged because I had no defence or clue. In smoldering frustration, he went outside to retrieve the keys. When he returned 5 min. later, he had locked His keys in His vehicle. You can't make this stuff up folks ....This is my first comment on your site but I just wanna say your family has gotten me through COVID. I just discovered your pod casts. I have started listening from the first one. On episode 3 next. So fun, relatable and real. I was singing the TV. theme songs with Penn. Turns out I knew every lyric. 🙄Your ADHD videos validate my soul. 😅
I want to thank you for the great ADHD videos. My teen son has ADHD and is still figuring it out. I love that you emphasize the positive parts that come with this. Thank you!!
OMG this killed me!😂 i have the worst adhd brain, my husband's biggest pet peeve is the fact that i will go in the kitchen and by the time i leave every cupboard, and drawer, the microwave, and both pantries doors will be open, drives him crazy, he'll ask me why on earth i open everything and why can't i menage to close things! Adhd brain! My daughter had a good laugh at me tonight, we went to get a snack and in the 5 minutes we were in the kitchen i somehow lost one of my socks, i had 1 sock on when i came downstairs with 2, she asked me what happened to my other one and i literally couldn't remember, we looked everywhere and she ended up finding it in the washer, i have no idea why i put 1 of my socks in the washer and left the other one on my foot. I get distracted too easily
The scene of closing every drawer, cabinet, etc..... that is so my husband! Ugh.... makes me crazy- you opened it- close it!!
Whenever I set something important down somewhere other than its home spot, I have to say where it is at least 3 times out loud to help me remember. Sometimes it's like I can't finish a train of thought to save my life. 🙃