Very cool of her to share this. There is so much shame and pressure and just bullshit that people deal with around sex/sexuality etc and it's really hard feeling like you're doing things differently to EVERYBODY ELSE! I know having stories like this being more common place when I was a teenager would have made me put less pressure on myself, and I might have done things "on my terms" rather than do what I believed I was meant to be doing because of outside influences. Thank you Rebel xx
Yes! My first time was planned with my friends cousin, whom I'd never met. I was so afraid and decided I wanted to find out what it was like, so that's what I chose to do. It was the summer before 9th grade!!!!! It makes me mad at myself that I made that choice. It makes me sad that I felt like I needed to make that choice at such a young age. I love hearing about people who waited until they were truly ready. I hate that I didn't.
I think it’s awesome! I had a kid by 22. I absolutely love my child, but I think about how I missed out on a lot of experiences because I was so concerned with being in a relationship because I thought that’s what makes us feel complete. It doesn’t! Loving ourselves and accepting our flaws is what we need to do. As an older adult, I would recommend to anyone to wait and focus on being their best self. The right person may come along, but if they don’t… you’re an awesome human that doesn’t need another person to make yourself feel whole.
as an almost 21 year old who has never had someone genuinely love her romantically enough to be in a relationship, and who feels so outcasted by that, hearing this is so healing. thank you for your authenticity rebel ❤! total QUEEN! 👑
Girl 20/21 is so young, most people haven't been in a proper loving relationship at that age, most people haven't even fully grown up. You'll get there!
it’s completely normal to be a virgin at 21 years old. i’m 20 and lost mine at 16, and looking back, i was definitely too young. it kind of messed with me mentally. there’s absolutely nothing wrong with waiting for the right person to come along. it’s not weird. trust me, you’re completely fine
As someone who is 26 and still a virgin, I relate so much to this. Not telling anyone and feeling ashamed about it. But it truly is nothing to be ashamed of. Thank you for speaking out about this❤️
It's okay, my best friend lost her virginity at 27, not because she couldn't get attention or something, just because she was uncomfortable before. She actually said that I helped her a lot, I got her a vibrator for Christmas once 😂 she experimented with herself until slowly becoming comfortable
I’m 35 and I’ve never even kissed anyone, much less slept with them. 🤷🏻♀️ It’ll just be that much more special if I ever meet someone with whom I want to share that part of myself.
I hear ya! I'm 30, and I decided in my mid 20s that I'd had enough and I was going to at least kiss someone. I immediately regretted it because the connection just wasn't there, and even that relatively low level of physical intimacy with someone I didn't have real feelings for just made me physically and emotionally uncomfortable. I do feel slightly ridiculous for waiting this long, but I also know now that there's no point rushing into something if I'm not even going to like it. If the right person comes along I am absolutely interested in sex, but until then I've realized I'm genuinely happier without.
This is why i love the internet.. we're always surrounded by people who would shame us for having want to wait.. i would sometimes cry at some nights thinking about whether i should just give it up but i just don't want to 😂 even if (may God forbid) that my husband might not be my forever, at least, i gave it up to someone who is willing to commit to me in marriage.. it's just some religion belief as well, bc ppl say it's nonsense to rely on legal certificate, but i dont see it as just legal cert, it's a beautiful union of two people committing to each other..im only 27 so i feel included from her story and the comments in this shorts ❤
Thanks for sharing 🌹❤️ I'm the same! I'm 30 and I still want to share my first kiss with someone I truly share a genuine connection with, I don't want to compromise the quality of my intimate life experiences just to fit in with societal norms.
As a 24 year old I'm glad I ain't alone in this.And there is nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing wrong on waiting for the right person,that special person.
As someone who lost it way too early and regretting it, I get the wanting-to-know part and the feeling-weird part, but losing it on your own term, even if it‘s late in life, is such a great thing and if I could speak to my younger self I would tell me that.
I’m sorry that you feel the emotion of regret, however, I will note that the inability to be intimate with someone has been traumatizing in its own way. Especially when I’m literally in bed with a nice person and then I chicken out at the last minute and it’s like, we’re both frustrated and it’s something that’s so natural but for whatever reason it’s just the way that I am at this time. And I am often jealous of people who are able to connect in that way easily
This is actually pretty important for people to hear (of course if someone is comfortable sharing an experience like this). I feel like being a virgin as you get to your mid 20’s to then late 20’s and your 30’s feels like it’s something to be ashamed about, because you always hear of people having sexual experiences earlier on and it starts to feel abnormal and alienating when you have not had that experience before. So I’m glad she talks about this, because it might feel much better for a “late bloomer” to know they’re not alone and not worse than someone who has had experienced sex at a younger age.
I saved it for my husband and he saved it for me and I have no regrets! Nothing wrong with waiting, and for me personally it was so special getting to share that with only him. No one should ever feel ashamed of waiting and doing it on their terms
I'm over 30, have a daughter and am a virgin (got her through a donor). I really don't care about it, but when I was younger I thought sex was so important. Later in life, I realised the only reason it felt important was because others told me it was. I couldn't care less about it to be honest. Relationships often don't work out for me because men always see sex as one of the most important things in a relationship, while I value pretty much everything else over doing it. I am happy with the friends and family I have an enjoy their time spend with me :). Respect for Rebel!
I am so grateful for her sharing this. I am 32(F), life had heen hard, medical issues, had to rebuild my life again, ran into wrong people.... And i felt hopeless, but maybe i dont have to.
You don’t have to! I am also 32F and I’m not a virgin but I’ve only had sex as an adult twice and was sexually assaulted as a child. And I don’t want to have sex. I regret the times I did it because I knew I didn’t want to I just felt like I HAD to. Well I’m over it. Sex is overrated and I’m glad Rebel is spreading this message. Also I wanted to share because I relate to you!!!
You don't, hun. I'm 34 and a virgin. Life just happened that way. I came close a couple of times, but didn't go through with it because it just didn't feel right. Then life happened, family issues, financial issues, health issues, etc. If it happens someday, then great! But it's not a priority.
@@ET-en8gi Same, girl! And great timing, because i reliazed, that I haven't missed out on anything really just a day ago. It makes me a little self-conscious and that i cannot do random hookups, but it's okay. I am not built for it anyway i guess.
My partner was a virgin when we met. Knowing that really just made me more considerate to really make it special 😊 He was fine that I had had sex before and I was fine that he hadn’t. I hope more people make this known!
Thank you for your honesty. I think it’s important that whatever age you are comfortable with is the right age. Whether that’s 19 or 39. There should be zero stigma associated with virginity whether it’s a personal choice or a byproduct of happenstance.
Yeah. I lost my virginity at 18 to a guy I barely knew on a dating app because I was so worried about being a 'loser' who didn't have sex until later in life. Which is obviously not how we should treat young women and girls. Obviously if you lost it similarly that's fine, it's just not me. But I hurried it along. Because I was worried about my self worth.
same everyone was losing theres early in my school and i felt like a loser boys didnt like me. i lost mine at 19 to my first boyfriend . people still consider that a late bloomer😣
I did the same exact thing but at 19! Same reasons, same feelings, same fears. Also on a online dating site. Ugh. It was a bad experience but I was also grateful to have just done it to say I had. 🤦♀️
I wish i could say the same. I never had the option. Mine was stolen from me.. I respect her for waiting. Its nothing to be ashamed of. We need more people making these choices.
I sorry for you, nobody deserves that and I hope you are well. And as you said there is nothing to be ashamed of the person who did that to you should be ashamed.
If it was stolen from you, you still are a virgin for me. For me it is sharing sexual intimicy and activities on your termes with someone that you chose. Everything else isn t, so this wasn t sex, this was abuse ! And abuse isn t your choice but sex is. There is no such thing as "consensual sex", you have sex or assault nothing else. I hope i am not hurting you by saying this. But for me the choice is still and will always be yours even if people hurt you, they didn t take that away from you, don t let them. You have been hurt, treated like an object, when you were not. They will never take your choice away from you, the choice of having a first or never have one. I have few Friends that have been assaulted, i was myself, and i can only see this way. Sorry if this is hurting you to read it, i wish you the best and i applogize. And if you are like my friend and cry because she feels better after my words, i wish you the best too 🥰 I am not denying what you lived, just that you deserve the world and this choice is yours, it can only be yours, nobody can take that away, even if they hurt you to your core.
I am so sorry this happened to you! You are precious and valuable and special and this was spectacularly wrong and evil. I feel like your first sexual experience was stolen yes. But I don’t think that’s your virginity. I feel like virginity must be given and can’t be taken. So you choose when to give your virginity. Love and blessings. ❤❤❤❤
Honestly, it should be on your terms. Mine was not. If i had a say I would have waited. Nobody should ever make fun of someone for choosing to wait or even not at all. Im glad she shared this
Mine was not my choice either ❤🫂 I hope you are on the journey of healing and forgiving yourself. Just managed to start mine a decade later. Thank you for making me feel less alone even if it does also make me want to burn the world a bit that others have also gone through this 🪷
Im 20 and ive never even had my first kiss yet. Sometimes i feel like a late bloomer but theres also nothing wrong with that either. Hearing this makes me feel so much better❤️
I was 27 and I felt so much shame and pressure about it, I finally said screw it, I'll just rip the bandaid and see what all the fuss is about. Turns out it's not that life changing of an experience and I didn't miss out on that much. I really don't care about it anymore, it was the social pressure that was torturing me at the time and it seems silly to me now that I ever worried so much.
@@iamthedangerbiznatch what is? That a first kiss at 30 isn’t special? It’s not LMFAOOO facts…. You missed out on teenage love and missed your special moments. Congrats
Im glad she is openly discussing this. Im 26 and have been in relationships in the past but have never felt comfortable enough for them to become physical. Its definitely caused me a lot of shame and made me question myself and my sexuality. You can't help how you feel and I am sick and tired of feeling ashamed for something I cant control and is honestly no ones else's damn business anyway. It's my body and my choice when and who I share it with. It is one of the bigger reasons I am not actively dating, I dont want to feel like I have to justify myself or lack of experience to anyone or feel pressured into doing somethng I dont want to do. 🤷♀️
Im not sure why this isent more normal. Most people lose it as a teenager thats still a child. I never understood why everyone would brag about it when they did.
I lost mine the wrong way, I met someone on an app and hooked up, it was the one and only tike now I'm scared for life the memory flashes back in my mind all the tike and I wish I had never done it...
Went through the same EXACT experience last year. It was super upsetting at the time but if I can provide you with any solace I want you to TRUST me you will get over it with time and it won’t hurt anymore. My friend told me this and it changed my perspective, maybe it will yours,, she said “if things worked out between you and him (the guy I lost it too) would you still feel like you lost it the wrong way?” And the answer is no because then what would I have to feel ashamed about then? So you’re probably feeling sad because of the guy’s actions (idk if you guys are still in contact). There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you and sometimes people take advantage of other’s naivety.
Find peace in the fact that you can only grow from this situation. There’s no right way to lose it. I understand we usually have an ideal way we want to lose it but sometimes life throws different situations at us. Try to find a healthy way to cope with the situation that works for you. I tried journaling and talking with friends and crying A LOT lol and it’s honestly helps. If you wanna rant to me you can. The pain and regret will subside with time, many people have gone through the same, so you are not alone trust. 🤍
I’m sorry you feel that way, I would say a lot of us regret our first time, I do and mine was with my first bf. It’s like we pressure ourselves and it’s all such a huge letdown but it def won’t always be
@melodie1844 no, my situation was different, I didn't know the guy, the guy was mid 30s and I was 19 at the time, and I was too nervous to tell him no because I was there in his house... and it happened. He catfish me lol, bro was not hideous but he was definitely not the guy I was talking with online. Also im gay, and i was raised pentecostal if that says anything...Needless to say that situation was scarring.
Thank you Rebel for that🧡 really thank you❤ for your honesty, it feels so comforting. In this world full of pressure i really needed to hear this to see, or rather remember to see that its okay to go on your own pace
This is so sad that we feel we have to have sex to what? Fit in? Have worth? Have value? Be interesting? You are more than your body. You are more than your virginity. Stop making giving your body to as many people as you can fun or cool. This breaks my heart that people feel like they have to be like everyone else to live a good life. Casual sex is not healthy!
Abstinence is so underrated. Zero risk of disease, pregnancy, no awkwardness or drama. You know how to please yourself better than anyone can. I can date someone and we split on great terms because we never took it too far. I went to an ex’s wedding recently and there was zero awkwardness for any of us cause there was no sexual history. Likewise you can keep all the professional / business connections from your ex’s when you don’t hook up. I can’t recommend abstinence enough.
Never feel ashamed for being safe and careful, sex is a very intimate thing that people like to say is nothing. But trusting your body with another human being is NOT nothing, it is a very big and scary step. I have friends and family who are still virgins but I don't really care because at the end of the day, that's their choice and no one should shame them for it. Thank you for sharing this vulnerable part of your life I'm sure many people out there really find this comforting. Sadly society has made it to where we aren't comfortable sharing things like this that are completely normal. People will shame you if you screw around or if you simply don't be intimate with anyone. I wouldn't pay much attention to negative attitudes because at the end of the day, people who make mean comments are just projecting their own insecurities. Stay cool, and I hope the internet is being kind to you❤
She was a virgin in pitch perfect? Wow. Proud of her for putting that out there. This is a good example for young girls who are worried they need to do it sooner rather than later. Thank you Rebel. ❤
I lost mine at 33, Ive had fears of intimacy due to childhood trauma but when I met thatbspecial person he helped me overcome those fears and we're still together...it made me realize that loosing your virginity isnt a competition, its more beautiful and meaningful if you loose it with the person you love and both your body and mind are prepare not just because you were pressured to do it.
I waited until I found the right person that I have some connection with and liked alot and had an attraction. I was 29 . I don’t think waiting is a big deal anymore. I am not the person to sleep around with random people so it depends on who you are. 😊
I'm 20 and have never had a man look at me romantically. At 18 I was embarrassed that i have never had a bf or a man look at me. So I almost lost my v just to blend in with the girls my age. Now I am so glad I had people in my life tell me to wait. I'm still single but am not ashamed. Love you rebel !❤
My husband was 21 when he had his first kiss. He was so ashamed, he first told me years into our relationship, but honestly I love him even more for it, and I am so honored to be the one that got to give him that special kiss. ❤
I lost mine at 20 and thought I was late because I knew people in the place I grew up who had their first experience at 12... let that sink in. Today I know some people who are still virgins but are either Ace or just don't have "losing it" as a priority which I think is a good outlook honestly.
My daughter is 22 and is still a virgin. She just graduated college in April. She doesn’t drink. I can attest to the fact that she has a horrible diet of a 6 year old though lol so that comes into play. She doesn’t like the taste of alcohol or beer. Not even wine. And she’s never done drugs or vaped. And she’s absolutely BEAUTIFUL! She was on the presidents list a lot of years in middle and high school and EVERY semester of all four years of college! I tell everyone! 😂😂 so this is something MORE ppl should talk about and tell others instead of feeling ashamed about! Nobody should EVER be ashamed of that! The culture is so backwards today! I’m 41 and I lived a very hard lesson kinda life so I’m super proud my daughter went and did the complete opposite and I get to call myself her mom! Young girls that are like this should be the ones that are celebrated in society and protected More often (actually ALWAYS AND ALL THE TIME) than the ones that are out there just partying and dropping panties for anyone just to call it “feminism” or womanhood and saying anyone contesting it is “slut shaming”! Because I’m sorry but as a past “slut “(20 yrs ago ppl. For just two years lol I was with her dad for 19 years and got cheated on and abused and stayed bc I was proud to have stayed with the father of both of my kids. Big mistake. But bc I was once kinda going through a slut “stage”-fuck it let’s call it what it was-I was proud that I was with only one man for half my life! From 161/2-35! The worst thing was The age I was during the slut stage. I was 14-16! A child!!! Protect your kiddos more people, don’t let them just go do whatever and not ask questions! But DON’T withhold them from being able to do ANYTHING. That’s why I rebelled to begin with and ran away all the time. So let them do things with friends and go toafter school school sponsored activities (like I was not even allowed to go skating that was a school skate night. Or stay over at friends or go to the movies or the mall! My dad was super strict!) but monitor their online activities better and social media usage and take away the phone as punishment bc I’ve found they cannot LIVE without those things!😂
In my case because IT means im unlovable. Nobody wants me, i had difficult relationship with mom and dad... Seeing other girls beeing picked, apreciated, dating Hurts. Makes me feel less 😭
@@nm8247 im trying to stop waitng for someone to love me. Just accepting my live as is is. We are all worthy no matter if single or not . My life. Ok for me to love IT 😘
@@LoveCoffe56 I don’t know how my life will look in 7 years… I’m still hoping but otherwise I will be also 30 and single. I’m wishing you the best 🙂↕️
I’m 22 years old and I haven’t given that away yet, I see no shame in that. There’s no schedule to it, it’s just all about letting passion find you with that special person. Anyone who still is a virgin, shouldn’t have to feel embarrassed - and it took me a while to accept that I don’t have to be.
Hello there. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed for respecting yourself and waiting. Do not follow the crowd. Wait till marriage as it'll be more meaningful. I'm 34 and still waiting
To all the virgins in the comment; do it when you're ready. It's better to wait and do it on your terms rather than regret your first like most of us do ❤️
I lost it at 21 and didn't have again a chance again until 23, and belive that the older you get, the better you know yourself better and I always say I am quite proud that I didn't do it when being a teenager because it was really nice being older
It’s strange i got this short today because i silently started having a mini crisis (that i’m sure will grow) because i’m 21 and turn 22 in a couple months and am heading into my senior year of college. like, i’m gonna be a full blown adult in the real world by this time next year and yet i’m still a virgin who has never had a *real* relationship. sure i can say i’ve had situationships with people but i have no idea what it’s like to actually be loved, emotionally and intimately. it was a really scary and sudden panic that came through me, and then this short eased me a bit.
For whoever might be dealing with this: Please never let others make you feel this pressure. This culture is really wrong for this! You are the only one who will deal with the consequences of this act. Thus, I would suggest only doing that act in marriage, especially since it is made to be an act of love and union! Actually, it is meant to be with the one person you love, and that one person needs to be worthy of you. He or she needs to love you wholeheartedly to the point of marrying you and wanting to be with you forever at every stage of their and your life. Otherwise, you are risking so much of your dignity, purity, health and heart. And even more! For what? For who? Imo, only a man who is man enough to marry his lady, love and protect her, or a woman who wants that man the same way, a couple who basically want to be there for each other, are worthy of having each other fully after they're united in Marriage. After marriage is better for many reasons, e.g. the great gift of having children together and becoming a family! It is never too late to start preserving yourself and waiting. Anyways, I wish you all God's Love, Grace, and Blessings! All the best to you!
Cool for sharing Rebel! I hope this will resonate with people in a world so focused and obsessed with sexuality! Normalizing that people can have control over this is really an empowering thing! It is sacred!
Yep, so glad I waited until I was 30 to give mine to the man who deserved to have me in such an intimate way. It is worth the wait. Good for you, Rebel❤️
@@kaitlynperry6376 yeah mine wasn't a bad experience by any means and I actually had a 4 year relationship with the guy , but I still wish I had waited til I was older
I actually think it’s really cool she was a virgin that long. Now days there is all the pressure to lose it at such a young age and if you are a virgin when you are older than 16 you are basically a loser. We need to get rid of the stigma
@ThisIsOverratedx I just don't discuss it anymore and my friends don't seem to care) young people like 16-22 seem to care the most, but after that they either assume you have your sex life figured out or they just do not care and love you for what you are!
Theres SO much pressure on having it...i WISH i waited till i was ready! Its very special, intimate and should be reserved for the right person. Not given away to just anyone
I will be over 30 because I’m waiting for marriage. And I’m so thankful I am. My bf is the most important person to me and he and I want to share that moment together.
Remember that virginity is a social construct and that we should try not to listen to rules of our society. We still fear sex and in the meantime we "order" people to have it, we are so fucked up😂. Listen to yourself only.
While it is a social construct to link morals and worth around virginity ... There are hormones and stuff that are released that change you a little. Although, these changes are true for the first time with any new partner. So in some ways any new partner is a new virginity and matters. Respect yourself enough to consider who you are letting that close to you that it changes you own body chemistry. ❤
Very cool of her to share this. There is so much shame and pressure and just bullshit that people deal with around sex/sexuality etc and it's really hard feeling like you're doing things differently to EVERYBODY ELSE! I know having stories like this being more common place when I was a teenager would have made me put less pressure on myself, and I might have done things "on my terms" rather than do what I believed I was meant to be doing because of outside influences. Thank you Rebel xx
Id like this multiple times if I could.
It so important for ppl to understand that.
In india It's very normal 😊
Yes! My first time was planned with my friends cousin, whom I'd never met. I was so afraid and decided I wanted to find out what it was like, so that's what I chose to do. It was the summer before 9th grade!!!!! It makes me mad at myself that I made that choice. It makes me sad that I felt like I needed to make that choice at such a young age. I love hearing about people who waited until they were truly ready. I hate that I didn't.
As a 26 year old, this makes me feel so much more normal.
Lol same here...😂
@@Hokage982dude sex is over rated and lame don’t feel pressured at all
I think it’s awesome! I had a kid by 22. I absolutely love my child, but I think about how I missed out on a lot of experiences because I was so concerned with being in a relationship because I thought that’s what makes us feel complete. It doesn’t! Loving ourselves and accepting our flaws is what we need to do.
As an older adult, I would recommend to anyone to wait and focus on being their best self. The right person may come along, but if they don’t… you’re an awesome human that doesn’t need another person to make yourself feel whole.
Also 26 honey, no need to rush. People can be asexual, too.
Same here
as an almost 21 year old who has never had someone genuinely love her romantically enough to be in a relationship, and who feels so outcasted by that, hearing this is so healing. thank you for your authenticity rebel ❤! total QUEEN! 👑
Girl 20/21 is so young, most people haven't been in a proper loving relationship at that age, most people haven't even fully grown up. You'll get there!
Im 23 and like uu girl
Its totally fine♥️♥️♥️
Yeah just make sure you want to do it and it feels right for you with the right person ❤
Please know that you’re not an outcast. God has a person for you somewhere! Just pray y’all meet at the right time ❤️ God bless!
Me too! I’m 22 and still didn’t find anyone to be in a relationship ❤️❤️
As a 21-year-old virgin who's never been in a relationship (fear of intimacy✨), hearing Rebel speak about her experience is so comforting
it’s completely normal to be a virgin at 21 years old. i’m 20 and lost mine at 16, and looking back, i was definitely too young. it kind of messed with me mentally. there’s absolutely nothing wrong with waiting for the right person to come along. it’s not weird. trust me, you’re completely fine
Same here but with 23, glad to hear I’m not alone❤
@@milouiscool Heavily agreeing with you friend!
omg it’s so comforting to know i’m not alone 🤍 I always thought i was really weird for it and it made me feel like i was outcasted
Bro 21 is really young. I'm 20. Grew up in a different culture I suppose but 21 is young bro
As someone who is 26 and still a virgin, I relate so much to this. Not telling anyone and feeling ashamed about it. But it truly is nothing to be ashamed of. Thank you for speaking out about this❤️
27❤❤❤ same here
CELEBRATE this!
It's okay, my best friend lost her virginity at 27, not because she couldn't get attention or something, just because she was uncomfortable before. She actually said that I helped her a lot, I got her a vibrator for Christmas once 😂 she experimented with herself until slowly becoming comfortable
26 Same here ❤❤❤
ME TOOOOO I'm almost 27. we should be proud ngl😂🤗
I’m 35 and I’ve never even kissed anyone, much less slept with them. 🤷🏻♀️ It’ll just be that much more special if I ever meet someone with whom I want to share that part of myself.
I hear ya! I'm 30, and I decided in my mid 20s that I'd had enough and I was going to at least kiss someone. I immediately regretted it because the connection just wasn't there, and even that relatively low level of physical intimacy with someone I didn't have real feelings for just made me physically and emotionally uncomfortable. I do feel slightly ridiculous for waiting this long, but I also know now that there's no point rushing into something if I'm not even going to like it. If the right person comes along I am absolutely interested in sex, but until then I've realized I'm genuinely happier without.
I'm the same as you are, at 34 right now and i haven't found that person who i can be comfortable doing it
This is why i love the internet.. we're always surrounded by people who would shame us for having want to wait.. i would sometimes cry at some nights thinking about whether i should just give it up but i just don't want to 😂 even if (may God forbid) that my husband might not be my forever, at least, i gave it up to someone who is willing to commit to me in marriage.. it's just some religion belief as well, bc ppl say it's nonsense to rely on legal certificate, but i dont see it as just legal cert, it's a beautiful union of two people committing to each other..im only 27 so i feel included from her story and the comments in this shorts ❤
Thanks for sharing 🌹❤️ I'm the same! I'm 30 and I still want to share my first kiss with someone I truly share a genuine connection with, I don't want to compromise the quality of my intimate life experiences just to fit in with societal norms.
Literally the same and I'm almost 30. Thank you for sharing
As a 24 year old I'm glad I ain't alone in this.And there is nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing wrong on waiting for the right person,that special person.
I like that!I always felt ashamed being a virgin in my mid 20s. This makes me feel better and less ashamed always felt weird being older and a virgin
Nothing to be ashamed of.
Mid 20s is not the same as mid 30s
@@marsela7877 Shouldn't matter either way.
Right!! I hate that everybody is so judgy and feels like theyre something better!!
Like that is their (only) worth 🤔
Yess!
As someone who lost it way too early and regretting it, I get the wanting-to-know part and the feeling-weird part, but losing it on your own term, even if it‘s late in life, is such a great thing and if I could speak to my younger self I would tell me that.
I’m sorry that you feel the emotion of regret, however, I will note that the inability to be intimate with someone has been traumatizing in its own way. Especially when I’m literally in bed with a nice person and then I chicken out at the last minute and it’s like, we’re both frustrated and it’s something that’s so natural but for whatever reason it’s just the way that I am at this time. And I am often jealous of people who are able to connect in that way easily
This is actually pretty important for people to hear (of course if someone is comfortable sharing an experience like this). I feel like being a virgin as you get to your mid 20’s to then late 20’s and your 30’s feels like it’s something to be ashamed about, because you always hear of people having sexual experiences earlier on and it starts to feel abnormal and alienating when you have not had that experience before. So I’m glad she talks about this, because it might feel much better for a “late bloomer” to know they’re not alone and not worse than someone who has had experienced sex at a younger age.
I’m not a virgin, but I haven’t had sex in 7 years and I’m almost 30. This made me feel a lot better!
Same!
Same! Glad to not be alone hehe
Thank for sharing, I 100% felt like I might be the alone in this- I started having sex when I was 22 and stopped for 7 years when I was 25 y.o.
Same!
Girl please, I AM a virgin and I’m about to turn 30.
Omg this makes me feel so much better! I am glad she opened up about this! 🥰
Oh my goodness! She just made me feel so much better. I'm turning 30 this year and I'm still waiting❤
Adore her even more with her honesty and that hair😍
I saved it for my husband and he saved it for me and I have no regrets! Nothing wrong with waiting, and for me personally it was so special getting to share that with only him. No one should ever feel ashamed of waiting and doing it on their terms
I'm over 30, have a daughter and am a virgin (got her through a donor). I really don't care about it, but when I was younger I thought sex was so important. Later in life, I realised the only reason it felt important was because others told me it was. I couldn't care less about it to be honest. Relationships often don't work out for me because men always see sex as one of the most important things in a relationship, while I value pretty much everything else over doing it. I am happy with the friends and family I have an enjoy their time spend with me :). Respect for Rebel!
So you are the infamous virgin mary huh🤔
@@vivi-ws9yllol Jane the virgin
You might be asexual xx
This was my dream when i was younger! It's great to see other people who view things the same way ❤
@@vivi-ws9yl That's me ;).
I am so grateful for her sharing this. I am 32(F), life had heen hard, medical issues, had to rebuild my life again, ran into wrong people.... And i felt hopeless, but maybe i dont have to.
You don’t have to! I am also 32F and I’m not a virgin but I’ve only had sex as an adult twice and was sexually assaulted as a child. And I don’t want to have sex. I regret the times I did it because I knew I didn’t want to I just felt like I HAD to. Well I’m over it. Sex is overrated and I’m glad Rebel is spreading this message. Also I wanted to share because I relate to you!!!
“Maybe I dont have to” is so powerful🥹🥹
You don't, hun. I'm 34 and a virgin. Life just happened that way. I came close a couple of times, but didn't go through with it because it just didn't feel right. Then life happened, family issues, financial issues, health issues, etc. If it happens someday, then great! But it's not a priority.
@@ET-en8gi Same, girl! And great timing, because i reliazed, that I haven't missed out on anything really just a day ago.
It makes me a little self-conscious and that i cannot do random hookups, but it's okay. I am not built for it anyway i guess.
Huge respect for her. I feel so seen, as a 29 year old in the same position.
I think its wierd that men and women place value on ourselves based on wether or not weve had sex.
Because after a certain age, in like 99% of the cases, it means that nobody wanted you longterm.
Nope. 😊 @@JyS1991
This doesn't apply to women for sure.@@JyS1991
Right!! It is so weird, like who cares.
@@JyS1991 it doesn't mean anything like that. Life is so much more complicated.
My partner was a virgin when we met. Knowing that really just made me more considerate to really make it special 😊 He was fine that I had had sex before and I was fine that he hadn’t. I hope more people make this known!
❤
I had a virgin bf that was mad I had a life before him . They either take it well, or are insanely jealous
@@bostonb4kedbeans hope he's your ex noe
@@user-ml4ps5cq3v for sure!
And I hope more people can be like you, loving and respectful of men who we have a different path in life. Thank you.
Thank you for your honesty. I think it’s important that whatever age you are comfortable with is the right age. Whether that’s 19 or 39. There should be zero stigma associated with virginity whether it’s a personal choice or a byproduct of happenstance.
Yeah. I lost my virginity at 18 to a guy I barely knew on a dating app because I was so worried about being a 'loser' who didn't have sex until later in life. Which is obviously not how we should treat young women and girls. Obviously if you lost it similarly that's fine, it's just not me. But I hurried it along. Because I was worried about my self worth.
Shame on you
@@Kestr77Shame on your parents.
Same. Not because i really wanted to, but because i felt like it was something i had to do and just wanted to get the first time over with.
same everyone was losing theres early in my school and i felt like a loser boys didnt like me. i lost mine at 19 to my first boyfriend . people still consider that a late bloomer😣
I did the same exact thing but at 19! Same reasons, same feelings, same fears. Also on a online dating site. Ugh. It was a bad experience but I was also grateful to have just done it to say I had. 🤦♀️
Be proud of yourself! Be proud that you are yourself, and for your decisions
I wish i could say the same. I never had the option. Mine was stolen from me.. I respect her for waiting. Its nothing to be ashamed of. We need more people making these choices.
I sorry for you, nobody deserves that and I hope you are well. And as you said there is nothing to be ashamed of the person who did that to you should be ashamed.
If it was stolen from you, you still are a virgin for me. For me it is sharing sexual intimicy and activities on your termes with someone that you chose. Everything else isn t, so this wasn t sex, this was abuse ! And abuse isn t your choice but sex is. There is no such thing as "consensual sex", you have sex or assault nothing else. I hope i am not hurting you by saying this. But for me the choice is still and will always be yours even if people hurt you, they didn t take that away from you, don t let them. You have been hurt, treated like an object, when you were not. They will never take your choice away from you, the choice of having a first or never have one.
I have few Friends that have been assaulted, i was myself, and i can only see this way. Sorry if this is hurting you to read it, i wish you the best and i applogize. And if you are like my friend and cry because she feels better after my words, i wish you the best too 🥰
I am not denying what you lived, just that you deserve the world and this choice is yours, it can only be yours, nobody can take that away, even if they hurt you to your core.
I am so sorry this happened to you! You are precious and valuable and special and this was spectacularly wrong and evil. I feel like your first sexual experience was stolen yes.
But I don’t think that’s your virginity. I feel like virginity must be given and can’t be taken. So you choose when to give your virginity. Love and blessings. ❤❤❤❤
@@Lusciol3sI like how you explained this!
Honestly, it should be on your terms. Mine was not. If i had a say I would have waited. Nobody should ever make fun of someone for choosing to wait or even not at all. Im glad she shared this
Mine was not my choice either ❤🫂 I hope you are on the journey of healing and forgiving yourself. Just managed to start mine a decade later. Thank you for making me feel less alone even if it does also make me want to burn the world a bit that others have also gone through this 🪷
@@growley333 💓🫂
This makes me feel better as someone that is 35 and has not done it as well, I have just never felt comfortable or the need to
Im 20 and ive never even had my first kiss yet. Sometimes i feel like a late bloomer but theres also nothing wrong with that either. Hearing this makes me feel so much better❤️
I was 27 and I felt so much shame and pressure about it, I finally said screw it, I'll just rip the bandaid and see what all the fuss is about. Turns out it's not that life changing of an experience and I didn't miss out on that much. I really don't care about it anymore, it was the social pressure that was torturing me at the time and it seems silly to me now that I ever worried so much.
You know why it wasn’t that special? Because you waited so long. It’s very special when you’re young and in love. Nothing is special at 30 yrs old
@@staliokontos8763 this is just, not true, dude. There are 30 year old out there having amazing sex. You can be in love at 30
@@staliokontos8763 that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life LMFAOOO
@@iamthedangerbiznatch what is? That a first kiss at 30 isn’t special? It’s not LMFAOOO facts…. You missed out on teenage love and missed your special moments. Congrats
@@whatcanidooo no one said you can’t be in love…. You’re putting words in my mouth to make yourself sound more correct loser 😂
Im glad she is openly discussing this. Im 26 and have been in relationships in the past but have never felt comfortable enough for them to become physical. Its definitely caused me a lot of shame and made me question myself and my sexuality. You can't help how you feel and I am sick and tired of feeling ashamed for something I cant control and is honestly no ones else's damn business anyway. It's my body and my choice when and who I share it with. It is one of the bigger reasons I am not actively dating, I dont want to feel like I have to justify myself or lack of experience to anyone or feel pressured into doing somethng I dont want to do. 🤷♀️
As a 26 year old virgin I'm thankful she shared this with us.
My god she's beautiful. Whoever did her hair is awesome
Im having a downer moment right now cause I'm approaching 30, and I'm single. Thanks for the cheer up. 😊
Im not sure why this isent more normal. Most people lose it as a teenager thats still a child. I never understood why everyone would brag about it when they did.
Because not everyone considers themselves a child up until they're 25 lol
@@EarthHasSecrets 15 is child tho LMFAO
I lost mine the wrong way, I met someone on an app and hooked up, it was the one and only tike now I'm scared for life the memory flashes back in my mind all the tike and I wish I had never done it...
It wont believe me
Went through the same EXACT experience last year. It was super upsetting at the time but if I can provide you with any solace I want you to TRUST me you will get over it with time and it won’t hurt anymore.
My friend told me this and it changed my perspective, maybe it will yours,, she said “if things worked out between you and him (the guy I lost it too) would you still feel like you lost it the wrong way?” And the answer is no because then what would I have to feel ashamed about then? So you’re probably feeling sad because of the guy’s actions (idk if you guys are still in contact). There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you and sometimes people take advantage of other’s naivety.
Find peace in the fact that you can only grow from this situation. There’s no right way to lose it. I understand we usually have an ideal way we want to lose it but sometimes life throws different situations at us. Try to find a healthy way to cope with the situation that works for you. I tried journaling and talking with friends and crying A LOT lol and it’s honestly helps. If you wanna rant to me you can. The pain and regret will subside with time, many people have gone through the same, so you are not alone trust. 🤍
I’m sorry you feel that way, I would say a lot of us regret our first time, I do and mine was with my first bf. It’s like we pressure ourselves and it’s all such a huge letdown but it def won’t always be
@melodie1844 no, my situation was different, I didn't know the guy, the guy was mid 30s and I was 19 at the time, and I was too nervous to tell him no because I was there in his house... and it happened. He catfish me lol, bro was not hideous but he was definitely not the guy I was talking with online. Also im gay, and i was raised pentecostal if that says anything...Needless to say that situation was scarring.
I love that , don’t apologize or feel bad ,
Thank you Rebel for that🧡 really thank you❤ for your honesty, it feels so comforting. In this world full of pressure i really needed to hear this to see, or rather remember to see that its okay to go on your own pace
This is something to be proud of
This is so sad that we feel we have to have sex to what? Fit in? Have worth? Have value? Be interesting? You are more than your body. You are more than your virginity. Stop making giving your body to as many people as you can fun or cool. This breaks my heart that people feel like they have to be like everyone else to live a good life. Casual sex is not healthy!
Exactly ty
Tf? You’re sitting here acting like you’re saying something new and of value but you’re just as close minded as those you are condemning smh
Abstinence is so underrated. Zero risk of disease, pregnancy, no awkwardness or drama. You know how to please yourself better than anyone can. I can date someone and we split on great terms because we never took it too far. I went to an ex’s wedding recently and there was zero awkwardness for any of us cause there was no sexual history. Likewise you can keep all the professional / business connections from your ex’s when you don’t hook up. I can’t recommend abstinence enough.
Never feel ashamed for being safe and careful, sex is a very intimate thing that people like to say is nothing. But trusting your body with another human being is NOT nothing, it is a very big and scary step. I have friends and family who are still virgins but I don't really care because at the end of the day, that's their choice and no one should shame them for it. Thank you for sharing this vulnerable part of your life I'm sure many people out there really find this comforting. Sadly society has made it to where we aren't comfortable sharing things like this that are completely normal. People will shame you if you screw around or if you simply don't be intimate with anyone. I wouldn't pay much attention to negative attitudes because at the end of the day, people who make mean comments are just projecting their own insecurities. Stay cool, and I hope the internet is being kind to you❤
Oh my god she is a queen for this
Love her, thanks to her for opening up ❤
She was a virgin in pitch perfect? Wow. Proud of her for putting that out there. This is a good example for young girls who are worried they need to do it sooner rather than later. Thank you Rebel. ❤
I lost mine at 33, Ive had fears of intimacy due to childhood trauma but when I met thatbspecial person he helped me overcome those fears and we're still together...it made me realize that loosing your virginity isnt a competition, its more beautiful and meaningful if you loose it with the person you love and both your body and mind are prepare not just because you were pressured to do it.
I thought I was a weirdo for still being a virgin at 27. I have never meant anyone I could envision myself having sex with.
You're definitely not :)
28…. But this actually made feel better haha
You must be very proud of yourself for being brave and sharing such a personal thing in front of the audience
She’s right. It made me feel better 💗
I waited until I found the right person that I have some connection with and liked alot and had an attraction. I was 29 . I don’t think waiting is a big deal anymore. I am not the person to sleep around with random people so it depends on who you are. 😊
I'm 20 and have never had a man look at me romantically. At 18 I was embarrassed that i have never had a bf or a man look at me. So I almost lost my v just to blend in with the girls my age. Now I am so glad I had people in my life tell me to wait. I'm still single but am not ashamed. Love you rebel !❤
Me & you both! Turned 20 a month ago. No reason to be ashamed, if anything, it’s smart of us lol
My husband was 21 when he had his first kiss. He was so ashamed, he first told me years into our relationship, but honestly I love him even more for it, and I am so honored to be the one that got to give him that special kiss. ❤
Good on her all in your own time. I lost mine to the boy I had my first child too. ❤
Thank you so much for sharing this.❤❤❤ People feel so terribly alone about this.
Lost my virginity at 32 to the man I thought I would marry but God and he had different plans. Back to the single celibate life!
I respect her so much for opening up about this. I just know there's so many people out there who are insanely insecure about this
This isn’t out of the ordinary.
I’m so so glad she decided to share this. It made a lot of people feel a lot more normal and a lot less alone-me included.
I lost mine at 20 and thought I was late because I knew people in the place I grew up who had their first experience at 12... let that sink in. Today I know some people who are still virgins but are either Ace or just don't have "losing it" as a priority which I think is a good outlook honestly.
My daughter is 22 and is still a virgin. She just graduated college in April. She doesn’t drink. I can attest to the fact that she has a horrible diet of a 6 year old though lol so that comes into play. She doesn’t like the taste of alcohol or beer. Not even wine. And she’s never done drugs or vaped. And she’s absolutely BEAUTIFUL! She was on the presidents list a lot of years in middle and high school and EVERY semester of all four years of college! I tell everyone! 😂😂 so this is something MORE ppl should talk about and tell others instead of feeling ashamed about! Nobody should EVER be ashamed of that! The culture is so backwards today! I’m 41 and I lived a very hard lesson kinda life so I’m super proud my daughter went and did the complete opposite and I get to call myself her mom! Young girls that are like this should be the ones that are celebrated in society and protected More often (actually ALWAYS AND ALL THE TIME) than the ones that are out there just partying and dropping panties for anyone just to call it “feminism” or womanhood and saying anyone contesting it is “slut shaming”! Because I’m sorry but as a past “slut “(20 yrs ago ppl. For just two years lol I was with her dad for 19 years and got cheated on and abused and stayed bc I was proud to have stayed with the father of both of my kids. Big mistake. But bc I was once kinda going through a slut “stage”-fuck it let’s call it what it was-I was proud that I was with only one man for half my life! From 161/2-35! The worst thing was The age I was during the slut stage. I was 14-16! A child!!! Protect your kiddos more people, don’t let them just go do whatever and not ask questions! But DON’T withhold them from being able to do ANYTHING. That’s why I rebelled to begin with and ran away all the time. So let them do things with friends and go toafter school school sponsored activities (like I was not even allowed to go skating that was a school skate night. Or stay over at friends or go to the movies or the mall! My dad was super strict!) but monitor their online activities better and social media usage and take away the phone as punishment bc I’ve found they cannot LIVE without those things!😂
I don't know why people are so ashamed of that.
In my case because IT means im unlovable. Nobody wants me, i had difficult relationship with mom and dad... Seeing other girls beeing picked, apreciated, dating Hurts. Makes me feel less 😭
@@LoveCoffe56True… as a 23 year old who never had anything like that happen, it sucks but there is still beauty in other things.
@@nm8247 you arę young still. Im 30😭
@@nm8247 im trying to stop waitng for someone to love me. Just accepting my live as is is. We are all worthy no matter if single or not . My life. Ok for me to love IT 😘
@@LoveCoffe56 I don’t know how my life will look in 7 years… I’m still hoping but otherwise I will be also 30 and single. I’m wishing you the best 🙂↕️
I’m 22 years old and I haven’t given that away yet, I see no shame in that. There’s no schedule to it, it’s just all about letting passion find you with that special person. Anyone who still is a virgin, shouldn’t have to feel embarrassed - and it took me a while to accept that I don’t have to be.
Though it’s true, it’s very hard not to feel shy or embarrassed about it..
She is truly stunning at any size❤️
This is beautiful that she opened up about this.
As a 21 year old who has never even kiss someone this does make me feel less weird for it
Hello there. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed for respecting yourself and waiting. Do not follow the crowd. Wait till marriage as it'll be more meaningful. I'm 34 and still waiting
To all the virgins in the comment; do it when you're ready. It's better to wait and do it on your terms rather than regret your first like most of us do ❤️
I lost it at 21 and didn't have again a chance again until 23, and belive that the older you get, the better you know yourself better and I always say I am quite proud that I didn't do it when being a teenager because it was really nice being older
Haven’t lost mine. Will wait till marriage
Same
I was 29, nearly 30 when I lost mine, so I feel her on this. There is a certain stigma to losing it late in life
I’m 43 n still a virgin
💀💀
Congratulations, honestly.
@@Alexandra_B.G. tysm😇😇😇😇I’m waiting for the right one
@@user-sr7er6zu4q I'm really glad for you. I think it's the best thing we can do.
I lost it at 29 (wanted to lose it before 30 tbh) but this makes me feel seen. ❤
Aw I love this, good for her for stepping up because it makes so many people feel so much less alone
It’s way more common than people think.
Being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed of, if anything be proud of it because sex is not an accomplishment.
But an experience.
I was embarrassed about being a virgin then when lost it at thirty it was so lousy I couldn't believe I obsessed over it that long. ♥️
23 🙋🏼♀️ also did not have sex yet
very nice of her to share this 🖤
It’s strange i got this short today because i silently started having a mini crisis (that i’m sure will grow) because i’m 21 and turn 22 in a couple months and am heading into my senior year of college. like, i’m gonna be a full blown adult in the real world by this time next year and yet i’m still a virgin who has never had a *real* relationship. sure i can say i’ve had situationships with people but i have no idea what it’s like to actually be loved, emotionally and intimately. it was a really scary and sudden panic that came through me, and then this short eased me a bit.
A-24-has-never-slept-with-someone's here. So nice to hear that.
I lost mine at 25 & have only been with one more person after that and I'm 36 now. Intimacy is scary AF.
For whoever might be dealing with this: Please never let others make you feel this pressure. This culture is really wrong for this! You are the only one who will deal with the consequences of this act. Thus, I would suggest only doing that act in marriage, especially since it is made to be an act of love and union! Actually, it is meant to be with the one person you love, and that one person needs to be worthy of you. He or she needs to love you wholeheartedly to the point of marrying you and wanting to be with you forever at every stage of their and your life. Otherwise, you are risking so much of your dignity, purity, health and heart. And even more! For what? For who? Imo, only a man who is man enough to marry his lady, love and protect her, or a woman who wants that man the same way, a couple who basically want to be there for each other, are worthy of having each other fully after they're united in Marriage. After marriage is better for many reasons, e.g. the great gift of having children together and becoming a family!
It is never too late to start preserving yourself and waiting. Anyways, I wish you all God's Love, Grace, and Blessings! All the best to you!
It's actually not really that deep.
I applaud her for that! Amazing to first of all have the confidence to do her own thing and also to share it!
Feel for her, I lost mine at 14 in a bush.
Shame on you
@@Kestr77 whatever mom.
Bop
😂😂😂
Cool for sharing Rebel! I hope this will resonate with people in a world so focused and obsessed with sexuality! Normalizing that people can have control over this is really an empowering thing! It is sacred!
I lost my v-card late in life too at 33.
Thanks for sharing! I would much rather have a story like yours ❤ youre awesome
My husband lost his virginity at age 34 …. To me 😂. We got pregnant with our baby a year later 😂😂😂
Congratulations on your baby ❤
Why the laughs tho, clearly that isn't the tone here
Yep, so glad I waited until I was 30 to give mine to the man who deserved to have me in such an intimate way. It is worth the wait. Good for you, Rebel❤️
I was 24 and at that point it was just me trying to get it over with.
same...
Same
I applaud her for sharing this!! 👏🏾 s💗
I lost mine at 14, i wish i had waited
I lost mine at 14 as well. 23 now and I envy women who are still virgins/waited until the right person. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.
@@kaitlynperry6376 yeah mine wasn't a bad experience by any means and I actually had a 4 year relationship with the guy , but I still wish I had waited til I was older
Thank you Rebel!! There is so much pressure about that subject, especially for young girls like me and i'm so thankful that you stepped forward;)
I actually think it’s really cool she was a virgin that long. Now days there is all the pressure to lose it at such a young age and if you are a virgin when you are older than 16 you are basically a loser. We need to get rid of the stigma
She is a brave, talented, amazing, beautiful queen!!! Loooove Rebel!!!!!
I am 33 and soon to be 34 and still sexless 😅hopefully Ill be like her and loose it at 35z.
I’m 31 and a virgin still 😂 I think I might be ace…
Just turned 31 and same. I don't even know if I ever want to tbh but there's def social pressure
@ThisIsOverratedx I just don't discuss it anymore and my friends don't seem to care) young people like 16-22 seem to care the most, but after that they either assume you have your sex life figured out or they just do not care and love you for what you are!
turning 31 this year and i still haven't had my first kiss let alone sex 😂
nothing wrong with it honestly
Theres SO much pressure on having it...i WISH i waited till i was ready! Its very special, intimate and should be reserved for the right person. Not given away to just anyone
Ngl I didn't even know she was older than 35 so that was more shocking to me than the the virginity thing 😅
I will be over 30 because I’m waiting for marriage. And I’m so thankful I am. My bf is the most important person to me and he and I want to share that moment together.
Remember that virginity is a social construct and that we should try not to listen to rules of our society. We still fear sex and in the meantime we "order" people to have it, we are so fucked up😂. Listen to yourself only.
While it is a social construct to link morals and worth around virginity ... There are hormones and stuff that are released that change you a little. Although, these changes are true for the first time with any new partner. So in some ways any new partner is a new virginity and matters. Respect yourself enough to consider who you are letting that close to you that it changes you own body chemistry. ❤
Okay i official love her, shes just great
I was a virgin until my mid-20’s and shared the experience to someone I deeply care about.
I’m so happy that it happened with it did.
So awesome to speak your truth and be authentic! We all take different paths ❤