CANCELLED: Hating my Blackness, Healing Self-Hatred, Colorism, & Exposing Unconscious Bias
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 ก.ค. 2024
- In one of his most transparent episodes to date, Tarek revisits the traumatic events that led him to uncover his own self-hatred and the harm it was causing to others. From vulnerable conversations with his best friends that went left, to colorist tweets from grade school that resurfaced online in 2020, he shares how all of these experiences were just stepping stones to him learning how to love himself more. Aside from his powerful storytelling, this episode will provide you with the tools to help you reflect on your own (hidden) beliefs that may be keeping you from loving yourself to the fullest.
STREAM PODCAST ➭ thatconvopod.com/
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0:00-4:18 What to Expect: Video Synopsis
4:18 The Question that got us here
12:15 The discomfort of Change
15:57 Being "Cancelled" in 2020
21:40 The Aftermath
27:00 Examining my inner Self-Hatred/Colorism/Anti-blackness
39:55 Inner Beliefs + Exposing Unconscious Bias
link to products mentioned: www.amazon.com/shop/influence...
F A Q
what’s your name? Tarek Ali (Tuh-reek Ali)
are you muslim? no, but kind of? I'm omnist/perennialist
what’s your instagram? @itstarekali on everything
how old are you? 24 ( birthday 11/11/97)
What's your sign? Scorpio (virgo rising, aries moon)
how tall are you? 6'1"
what’s your ethnicity? African-American
where are you from? childhood in 757, middle school years in Richmond/Chesterfield, high school in PG Maryland (DC area)
what equipment do you use to film?
~if there is a blurry background and close up
➭ camera: amzn.to/3cMGWjf
➭ lens: amzn.to/2TCGEUK
~if it's a wide-angle and 4K
➭ camera: amzn.to/2CE2xgz
➭ lens: amzn.to/3eO3AYp
➭ mic: amzn.to/2TSbSpK
➭ more/all equipment: www.amazon.com/shop/influence...
➭ editing: final cut pro
![[SUB] 베몬이 교관님 멘탈을 탕탕 후루후루~٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶ FOREVER 웃게 되는 갓기들의 수련회 | 돌들의침묵 | BABYMONSTER(베이비몬스터) 'FOREVER'](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/FISAO7BwIxE/mqdefault.jpg)
I’m glad you opened up and are apologizing. As a black woman who faced SA as well those statements from you I saw were honestly pretty nasty to see and to hear especially from you since I love your content. I def believe in everyone growing - I’m just a bit conflicted since I’ve noticed SO MANY ppl especially within the black community or non-black ppl have similar histories of saying anti-black or misogynistic things towards black women specifically.
An apology is someone saying some words to make someone else feel better… it means nothing when you really think about it.
Wow... I saw the twitter stuff resurface and I was sooooo taken aback because I have followed you for so long and had no idea about the original tweets or the 2020 thing.. Then I started seeing people breakdown your response (which left a lil to be desired for me) and it put me in a place of questioning myself and my parasocial love for you, your content and your art. I didn't unsubscribe or anything but I haven't been back to your channel or socials til today because as you mentioned I was like "yeah this too much"...
But you taking the time to have this conversation publicly is EVERYTHING... THIS IS WHAT ACCOUNTABILITY and HONESTLY looks like.. I don't know if we should expect this from others but I am VERY GRATEFUL that you decided to do this.. I understand so much better now and also our children online.. this is why we need to be watching them and teaching them for their digital lives as much as their IRL lives... anyway... let me finish listening to this... sending you love 💖
Why r u black? 👶🏿
Ditto! 🤍
NOT… lol… it doesn’t change the fact of the matter.. why are people so moved by an apology…
Do you know how many times I’ve apologized just to get someone out of my face? Most people know this deep down, but it’s a hard truth. Apologies don’t mean much..
@@Coolguyallthetime2kApologies don't mean much to you if you lack empathy. I would like to think that most people don't lack empathy, but who knows?🤷🏾♂️
I’m glad you’re back Tarek. This feels like deja vu but you handle it with Grace every time! Appreciate your transparency. People say “colorism is real” but still don’t understand colorism is so real people have actually internalized it. & it is possible to unlearn!
And the thing is it’s definitely prevalent in queer spaces/queer community… I hope we can learn that the high prevalence of people being colorist/anti-black is rooted from occurrences and systemic discrimination/oppression than being just how people choose to think. HOWEVER, that doesn’t do away with consequences because it feeds into the same ideologies and systems that we were taught lol
@@micahcook2408 of course, it’s really vicious cycle.
We (black folks) need to allow ourselves grace. It is no wonder we have colorism issues. In this country, we have been conditioned to feel less than. Kudos to you, Tarik, for self reflection and healing.
This was a SOBER conversation 💪🏾
I’m a dark skin man and I seemed to ignore the thought that ppl didn’t like me bcuz of my skin. I dont recall many moments things were different bcuz I was dark skin but I over compensated in life. I have 4 degrees, like to stay dressed, and create the above others personas. 😭😭😭 I’m so glad I came to a place through self discovery to say I love me and whoever don’t. Bless them I have enough love for me. Hats off to you sir.
Just so we're clear! This video was created to help more people ask themselves questions and do the work on their own time. I make content to HEAL! Not to respond to hate, especially not from something years ago. This is for those who are always looking for ways to love themselves even more!! Watch the entire video/stream the entire podcast episode and you will get to thinking! love you!!!
❤
Have you actually healed? You posting a TH-cam video shows your making steps towards something.
Can we please get Ronald on the podcast?🤣ronald don’t lie, he seems to speak some truth. I feel that he’s got more to say!
I LOVE THE HONESTY!!!! Thank you for keeping it 100% and not gaslighting us like so much of our community does. A lot of us here know about colorism and texturism and featurism, etc. because we are invested in these kinds of conversations. But, there's still a lot of ignorance and denial in the general "black" population when it comes to this stuff. It's super annoying that these conversations still haven't become mainstream, but your transparency here, helps to get us closer to a point where it doesn't have to be so taboo to open up and talk about internalized anti-blackness. I can totally relate to what you're talking about, especially when you got to the part about your hair texture! I went through my own journey with racialized body dismorphia and facing it head on and opening up about it and it was really hard. But, I've noticed that it has really helped SOOOO MUCH to finally come out and talk about it with people instead of beating myself up and hiding from it in shame. There's been such a change in me and I'm so grateful that I decided to go on my own journey. So many of us have struggled with these thoughts and feelings, but not enough of us know how to acknowledge and admit it. Thank you!
As a person who is a fan of you, I love the vulnerability in this podcast. As a sociologist who focuses on men & masculinity, I love how you weave restorative and transformative justice work into a more personal and digestible medium. I have written many papers about Black manhood and I think you are a great example of Black manhood.
such a great point: healing ourselves is not just about healing from others words and actions. it is also about forgiving ourselves for what we have done to others but also to ourselves.
Thank you always for your videos! Only seeing you (from an internet / virtual lens) I’m glad to see your growth and having these conversations. You don’t run away from stuff. Thank you for being vulnerable with your followers / subscribers and the world. You help me to take a pause, reflect, better myself and grow.
“Having a life online because I didn’t like my life” FELT THAT😫
I honestly see you as a big brother in my head. I feel so seen , heard, n less alone when I watch you . As someone who takes pride in being honesttt emotionally , no matter how uncomfortable it may be - I’m super proud that you spoke about this. It’s almost a taboo topic , especially living in the era of intense toxic positivity I feel like. God / great spirit/ ancestors whatever - put you here for a reason , and there’s no lie - you’re here to help people. I love you brother 🙏🏾🙏🏾
Your growth is so inspiring, been watching you since living in Paris days and you motivated me in so many ways, i just wanted to tell you thank you for your authenticity 💕💕💕
I loved every thing about this video! Thanks for speaking out on your experience and this topic.
Haven’t even watched but. This is why I’ve always appreciated you and your platform. When I heard about this a few weeks ago, and then heard it was tweeted in 2012 is said “🙄 chile bye, this man has grown tremendously since” It didn’t even faze me that they were trying to chop you down. But thank you for being transparent ❤️
This video is so enlightening and validates the growth that I’ve experienced in my life. This is my kind of church! Practicing self-improvement and sharing the knowledge gained from your journey with others. Thank you, Tarek. ♥️
I saw other people posting about this and I’m happy that you addressed it, personally
Hey Tarek. I just want to let you know that this was very deep. Listening to your story and how unconscious bias has affected you really has me thinking about the unconscious bias that affects me daily. We all have to face ourselves at some point. For what I see, you have faced yourself and won. Thank you for sharing and helping others see themselves for what and who they are. ❤️
This is a much better self-reflection than your initial statement. That’s growth
I honestly was just being attacked for a second time after we did this three years ago and my ego showed up defending! I had to calm down, grab my peace, remind myself of who I was and lead with vulnerability.
@@TarekAli it takes a lot to hold yourself accountable in the way you did. I commend it. We are all messed up in some way by this society tho, most of us are just dishonest about it.
Tarek I commend you for having the courage to even indulge and respond to the topic. I can personally say I see your growth and you definitely aren’t the same individual. You’ve put in the work. Ik most say you can’t tell the people it was targeted too how to respond or how/when they should feel and proceed. But, I feel like there’s a difference between holding someone accountable, wanting them to learn from the mistake and holding it over someone head as a bullying tactic. Like to sit with the screenshots in your phone just have an aha moment is weird. Twitter is starting to become very unenjoyable it used to be fun and funny but now just full of mean girls
Mean girls… you mean hurt girls who constantly have to wave off attacks from a gender that’s more respected than us?
@@infinitedreaming222 you didn’t really read my comment did you?
@@MajinxDrolta read it, comprehended it, and still saw the victim blaming. BW are not believed ever so if receipts are popping up it’s because of that.
Maybe reflect alittle on not having grace for them just like we are having grace for tarek.
@@infinitedreaming222 I don’t think you did cause like I said I’m all for uncomfortable conversations and holding people accountable but it’s different when it’s used to try and be a bully. People who don’t care about making a change or wanting change just putting negativity out there for engagement and a “hit tweet”. There’s a clear difference if you aren’t one of those people then you’re not who I was referring too. Maybe you should try not to make such blanket statements about people you don’t know. 🤷🏽♂️ I fight for and respect my black women but I will call a spade a spade no matter who it is love. Happy black history month and I hope you have a lovely Sunday
So happy and proud that you're this open with your journey. Hopefully this will encourage more people to do the work and grow like you did. Lord knows we need to. Wish you all the love and success in the world♥
When I tell you this was soooo heart warming baby. I love you for this….your transparency, your vulnerability. It’s okay for us to forgive the past. We’ve all said and done stupid things and have grown from them.
You were a child then, you’re a grown man now and you know who you are 🙌🏾
Much love ❤🌹
Thank you for sharing Tarek! This was deep and internal. So much reflection to consider...
OMGGGG!!! I LOVE HOW AUTHENTIC & open you are, you INSPIRE ME, Thanks KING❤️
Love this through and through 😌 thank God for turning the lights on 🙌🏾
I was so unaware of my unconscious biases until I listened to this. Thank you so much Tarek❤ I’ma sit myself down and start working on me. I love you!
I’m really glad you made this video. I hope more bm who also exhibited and projected anti-blackness and colorism towards dsbw who “changed” learn that you can apologize all you want, but the real apology is in actions and unlearning.
Bm need to be the ones who hold each other accountable because obviously no one is listening to dsbw when it comes to colorism.
Off topic but Wow you are gorgeous
i felt so seen watching this. i’ve had some similar struggles im working through and seeing you be so open with this inspires me and i’m sure so many people!
Absolutely loved this video! Thank you for your journey. You are loved for your strengths and “weaknesses”. It’s not even a weakness tbh it’s just an experience. The human experience! Your human and I love you for overcoming and having the strength and courage to be grow above what you’ve been through ❤ Keep up the good work, your doing it just right.
Im really glad I watched this, I'm here 4 months after this was shared because I was really hurt seeing those tweets and unfollowed you for awhile. You popped up in my fyp and I was curious what you were up to because I genuinely enjoyed what you shared online. I know you don't think that way and you were coming from a hurt space. I'm glad you opened up to us with this and cant wait to see what you create next :)
the way i gasped, and said "ugh, YESSS!!" when i saw this in my sub box !!! 💛💛💛so so so excited to watch
Sending so much love, light & hugs 🤍
Thank you for this. I respect you so much Tarek ❤️❤️
0:36 I’m excited because you been doing the work and I’ve been doing the work. The mirror is everything that keeps you for have the courage to hold it up and stand tall for hours Tarek.
oooooooo started to see how you wasn't loving your blackness completely!!!! THATS A WORD!!! put it all on the table... that is such a powerful self audit!!! Love this for you !
baby you explained what you need to explain in that voice note on twitter. you did not need to address this but i understand why. people simply do too much in regards to peoples past and learning from ignorance. grace is needed. love you babe.
baby this is to help heal! not to excuse or explain. I would've made this video even if the 'cancellation' didn't happen. Thanks for the support though!
But you’re not a black woman.
@@Heyitschy03 I am though, and he’s right.
@@MissFaevyn you’re not a black WOMAN. stay out of our business.
@@Heyitschy03 I am black woman. Very much my business babe.
Fantastic job on this episode. If no one has told you this today, let me tell you. I am so proud of you and you’re doing an amazing job.
When I say you hit so many nails in the head with this one. Black people are consistently fostering environments, especially for the youth, that create hotbeds for excessive abuse. Part of me also feels like child abuse rates are higher in more isolated countries like the Caribbean. My mom is Jamaica, and I know that sexual abuse was rampant in her youth let alone her mother’s youth. Last year I had the privilege of becoming a substitute teacher after taking a break from working long term in film/media production (BFA in Screenwriting from Morgan State, I see you Virginia 💜 Come on DMV). One thing that alarmed me is the statistics for child abuse in California alone. And we would be lying to ourselves if we said that cultural and environmental factors don’t play some role in maintaining certain ideals whether good or bad.
Let me also say this. I am imploring you. Please. Release the idea that rape, incest, and abuse are words that are too dirty for you to use. You have NO REASON to feel ashamed to say that because it is not your fault. Call a spade a spade. Let me say it louder for the folks in the back. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. You were a CHILD. So when God gives you the space to speak, do it loudly and with purpose. If perpetrators are not ashamed of harming someone in that way, then why should we be ashamed to speak the truth? Why should we carry the burden of someone else’s mental and emotional instability. And imma say this part loud too. SEXUAL ABUSE IS A LEARNED BEHAVIOR. People don’t just wake up one day and say “let me purposefully ruin someone else’s life for my own temporary pleasure” I promise you. But when those experiences are never acknowledged and healed, oh absolutely you will continue to indulge in those behaviors.
Book Recommendation (Trigger Warning):
Flowers In The Attic, V. C. Andrews
So beautiful, this was a piece of art
the section on Unconscious Bias did a lot more to me than I realized damn
Hello Tarek. I'm so glad you are finally talking about this. I've followed your channel for years but, I was only vaguely aware of the controversy around your old tweets. As a darker skinned black woman, I have to admit the colorism prejudice has spilled over into both my professional and romantic life. This brand of racism has intensified in recent years and I find myself being attacked on the street by black men I don't even know. It is a very alienating experience and hurtful especially because it comes from people who look like me.
Wow...powerful video! You spoke straight facts, and dropped a lot of gems. I especially loved the section of the video where you talked about unconscious bias. Our subconscious and unconscious minds run our lives, and it is a something that as a society we should discuss more. Thank you for being open and transparent. If people do not already know, then they will soon find out that being honest with self is KEY in this life. It does take time though. Absolutely loved this video/episode... thank you for the conversation... much love and appreciation to you!
Thankyou so much . So so so so much this is so validating
I love this conversation, amazing, thank you
I’ve always heard the terms “once a racist, always a racist” however if the people that look like us are taking on the prejudice traits of a racist then that’s a huge problem. I like to look at socio-issues when colorism is involved, also learned behavior. If you’re a 90’s kid and above we come from a time where skin color jokes were very common even if you weren’t being “malice” (African booty scratcher) which was not right to say, but it was “normalized” in society. Now we are in a time where in our communities we are unlearning toxic behaviors and traits such as abuse, assault, authoritarian parenting skills, colorism, bullying, homophobia, transphobia, selfishness, the list is 1,000 miles long. So I understand how this can hurt the self-aware HS- MS Gen Z era who are social media raised. Timing is everything, everyone doesn’t get this. I watched a documentary on the lady from gone with the wind Hattie McDaniel and questioned her loyalty to the black community, but during that era doing what she did in her decision made sense. There is power in accountability, and perhaps Tarek can create platforms (such as his screenwriting) that highlight DSBW in the perspectives he see them now. Pointing the blame to him in HS means we need to hold ALOT of some of our favorite celebrities and creators accountable too (won’t list them but do your research. This is a Very Sensitive Topic especially what recently just happened with Tyre Nicols. As Black People we are a all time high questioning the protection and support from our own. Not easy at all. Proud of you Tarek for this, You have the skills to be better! Take what resonates with you.
Don’t mind my grammar ! I need my glasses
To this day I’m shocked you even said that .
Don't hate who you are. You are wonderfully made and you have a lot to share and give out of your experiences. Don't get tricked from or by the enemy forces that send negativity to your mind.
you are so loved !!
in love with the intro - you’re a thought leader
You did this to help and you really helped me
I needed this
I get it. I am a darker skinned woman. I have the opposite feeling. My skin gets blotchy in the fall and winter and hate it because my skin isn't even. Those blotchy spots are itchy and physically uncomfortable. No matter what I do. So when I see it makes it mentally worse. Getting into your race is hard as black person. I know I had a hard time loving being a black woman. It was a struggle when there was no positive role model. The first black barbie came out was a preteen. That tells you the I had to figure it out on my own. Thankfully my grandmothers told me how beautiful I was. Being black wasn't easy. I know many that struggle with being black. You aren't the first and won't be the last. I lived in that area area and hated it. I have been mistreated the most living there.
Hi gorgeous! How are YOU doing? I hope you’re doing good. Your content continues to help so many. Wishing you continued success and happiness:)
27:15 feelings and words inside of you don’t just go away, they stay there!
7:39 skin color changing with the seasons is a very brown skin black person thing
Thank you for showing up. we missed you. I had made an outline for a TH-cam video talking about unlearning racism my white, southern family passed down. I've never sat down and made it because it feels so uncomfortable like you said, but its important to call it out and start the conversation just like you always do. Thanks love you!!!
“Unlearning racism from my white family” is a topic I would definitely watch and respect. Wouldn’t be easy but would heal A LOT of people!
I just hate how on Twitter blew it up again out of the blue and people were dragging you for the same exact thing that you thoroughly apologize for already. But I understand that it’s reaching new people. Everyone has seen your journey and seeing you grow to a completely different person. We are not going to keep holding you down on something that happened when you were a literal teenager. Teenagers do stupid things. The fact that people don’t want to let you grow is annoying. Not everyone is perfect and you’ve clearly had a lot issues going on at that time as a teen. Nobody is the same person they were 10 years ago your brain literally grows in comparison. We embrace you to be a better person tarek you’re amazing.
I’m so proud of you for this video. This is the most thorough and reflective colourism conversation I’ve ever heard. I’m gonna share, this conversation is a win for the black community. Great job, T!
I literally love u so much🤭💘💕
Your friends sound like they’re amazing and courageous with being completely honest with you and confronting you even when it is painful and difficult to be told the truth. This was beautifully eloquent, so raw and vulnerable and transparent. Your healing is going to help so many other people heal. 💕💕💕🙏🙏🙏
Love it ❤️
im so proud of you .
I loved this conversation
Conversation?
I love you❤️keep going
Great video
Right ! U can unintentionally hurt ppl who remind u of your trauma when in actuality .. it’s not them.. it’s your past u never healed❤️🩹
10:23
11:11
Exactly
I honestly couldn’t pay the negative comments any attention. Those who follow you know how seriously you take your healing, respect, growth and accountability. I really hate cancel culture, you were a kid! This pointing the finger bs as if we weren’t young and dumb is played out.
One thing I’ve learned since being on this healing journey and spiritual journey. God don’t use perfect people to get the message out. If he wants you to do something He is going to make sure it gets done and sometimes it might be the most difficult and painful way but it got to be done.
Tariq, we fall down but we get back up. I can understand you. You are every man, every boy, about life and growing. We make mistakes but make amends. And we make efforts - if the Lord allow- to become better humans and share if we can.
19:49 sometimes you need a space to share dark thoughts 💭 that you might not fully agree with but you do need to let it out and communicate it fully
I'm so glad you're back! I get what you've felt because I lived in that era of "go outside" and I went through every shade of every season mainly in CA. It was traumatic as a child. You're younger than me (1988) but I was porch 🐵, a jungle 🐰, burnt trash....it's what was projected onto us and onto ourselves! I can't wait to see what comes from your self-discovery! I appreciate your truth and I know a lot of other ppl will too! Continue to live in your truth and continue to learn and grow, it will benefit you as you continue on this journey and when you get to my age and older! ♥️
You’re a legend
32:00 that was powerful
13:41 thank you !
32:51 kept it real !!! this PART
I’ve been worried about you ❤
I've been feeling all the love and prayers i promise. god has really been holding me. Thankyou thankyou
@@TarekAli I’m glad💕🙏🏾❤️
The whole if you are not feeling your pain you are probably hurting someone else thing is HELLA TRUE.
This is such a beautiful display of radical vulnerability, authenticity and accountability Tarek. I feel like I'm currently on the journey of intergoating the script of who I say I am and how that aligns with the actions, belief and behaviours I'm emulating. Unsurprisingly it's been hard having to accept there are of parts of myself I hate (hair texture, skin tone, features) even when I told myself I am all about the self-love. I truly believe you are doing the Lord's work and encouraging people to take a step towards vulnerability and planting the seeds needed for self love to grow. Keep doing what you're doing, as you are an inspiration to so many us out here.
Love me some TAREK!!
1:15 if you wanted to do the work in YOUR OWN LIFE - man a word
22:43 just because you are being honest doesn’t mean you will be heard or accepted
Racism is systematic. We are not all racist, we may be prejudice, but racism is systematic.Racists use their prejudice to oppress people systematically through education, employment, religion, and all other systems in society, so that they remain on top.
That part was me quoting brene brown talking to white people not all people
@@TarekAli ok got it
I've never commented before but watch all the time. But I just wanted to say I forgive you Tarek. I didn't know about this until watching this video and the tweets were surprising to hear as someone who's dark skin is always mentioned. The anger and resurfacing will never go away its life but know that God forgave you before you even asked for forgiveness and honestly I don't want you to apologise again. I've watched you for years and I think in comparison to the Tarek that apologised in 2020 this Tarek has come miles further and I believe you deserve the grace to speak publicly and keep growing. I know exactly why you spoke the way you did way back then it wasn't right but it was a deflection and we all do it. Allow the people you have offended to be angry, leave or even take longer to heal in their own time because its all valid. All the love to you x
❤we all wake up at different times little bro. Good work!
I love you 💕
Oh okay..
25:12 not to exaggerate trauma but the sexual assault you experienced from your step brother is so common among black boys, like it might be “the normal” but black men refuse to talk about it?. There are so ma y layers to that, shame, trust, family, boyhood, manhood, sexuality. It’s so layered. There is even believing the victim or not. That may be something one day you choose to unpack because where are those people now? Do your family members know?
I love u tarek
❤
i just didn't like how other content creators decided to make full length videos to stop people from watching ur channel. i did not like that at all. thank you for always sharing and having open discussions
I haven’t liked my nose, I like the way it looks from the side because it sits up high and straight but my nostrils are kinda wider than the tip of my nose and it has bugged me. I love how I look as a whole but if I could bring that in a tiny bit I WOULD NOT because I think loving yourself is loving what you’re born with as much as possible and there’s nothing wrong with my nose…. We have all been there for the most part, it’s a shame that there’s so much stigma around self love and what it takes to get there. It is a messy road but most people leave those skeletons in the closet . I’ve never heard someone be more fatphobic than someone who hates their weight, I’ve never seen more texturism than from people with thick textured and corse hair. It’s life and your transparency is so refreshing
12:27 growth is never comfortable
50:41 :) !!! YES
14:07 !!!!!
9:04 the fact that your friend considers you light skin is a whole word. I would not consider you light skin I would consider you brown skin
I liked your comment because I would consider him brownskin as well. However, when it comes to the colorism conversation, brown skinned black people are on the other side of colorism (in the sense that it's not experienced by them). I don't mean it doesn't happen at all, but it more often than not doesn't happen, especially in the same way actual dark skinned people experience it.
So I don't think that the friend literally thinks or identifies Tarek as Light Skinned, but he is saying for sure he is not dark skinned.
I am brown skinned as well, but I am lighter than Tarek and have a more ambiguous look. I personally have never experienced colorism. Not to say that my experience or lack there of speaks for all brown skinned people, but when you are Brown skinned, you can play both sides or be treated as a "conditional" light or dark skinned person.
For example, Tarek could tan really well and get closer to milk chocolate brown (dark skin). He has black features and has natural hair. He could easily at that point, be identified as more dark skinned by proxy (even from a social/societal standpoint).
However, for me I am at the palest I have been since I was a kid (my skin looks similar in color to Senaa Lathan), I have longer straight hair, and an overall more ambiguous look. The result is when I'm with a group if dark skinned and darker brown skinned guys im the "light skinned" one.
If I stand next to light skinned black guys (not biracial or mixed), I'm generally considered part of the group. I'm like them with a deep tan.
These types of nuances determine whether colorism within the Black Community affects you or not (from a brown skinned perspective).
@@KnijMagz thank you so much for your elaborate response. I think you verbalized a brown skin perspective really well
@@aliviablount thanks for reading! It's an interesting and often uncomfortable convo to have, but it's necessary.
I think it's definitely one step further to mending the divide in our community as far as colorism goes.
He’s not high yellow, but he is definitely light-skinned. Especially on the upper East Coast and South.
36:51 oh .... wow
ngl Twitter was out of pocket, it was really eye opening seeing people dragging someone I look up to, made me really think about how groupthink is so dangerous
They had a right to be outraged
the aftermath
This was brave Tarek.
14:40 You are what they call "safe brown" aka not dark or light. Light skin to me, is like Keyshia Cole, Tisha Campbell, Kym Whitley.
29:41 i love you :)
🫶🏾