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You’re very welcome and thanks for saying, I appreciate it

​@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP you got it! I know a woman that her son started weed when his sibling passed ,and she was wondering how to help him, it seems like she has to go through the coping mechanism, and then get to the addiction issue. How can I help her?

Thanks for saying, I really appreciate it. I’m very glad you’re here too! I hope the practice is going well, would be good to hear about it as things progress. Thanks again

Hi Adam, that's a really good question, I'm just not sure of the answer unfortunately. I have a feeling that they may say it can't be concurrent, but I think the best thing to do would be to call UKCP and ask them. I always find them helpful and I think someone there would be able to give an answer. Their website is www.psychotherapy.org.uk and telephone number is 020 7014 9955. Also, if there's a training organisation you like the look for for your masters, I guess you can see what they say. Also, if anyone else reading this has any knowledge or experience in the area, please do comment. Thanks!

Thanks for the message, it's a really common concern I hear and of course so important to be thinking about at this stage. Some comments on what you say: - it's always difficult to say what someone will earn in this profession, because one person is Gabor Mate, someone else had to go back to their previous job because they weren't able to get a private practice off the ground. I know a therapist who earned thousands of pounds for one TV episode and others unable to charge more than £35 an hour for a session for various reasons. For me, although of course I've had my moments, I've always trusted that it'll be ok and that I'll be able to afford the life I want to and that's what's happened. I can see the value that therapy has for people and trust that this will be reflected monetarily. The lifestyle you describe, as you say, doesn't sound too lavish or unrealistic as a therapist to me. - you mention not wanting to charge a lot, just to say, you can have some people paying a lot and seem people not paying much if that's what you'd like to do. Perhaps some sliding scale based on income? It's up to you, it doesn''t have to be a flat rate for everyone you see. - you say you feel a bit lazy about a portfolio career. From personal experience, it is different having to do more things that I didn't really want to do, compared to doing more things that I'm interested in and really want to do. Those two are light years away from each other for me in terms of motivation levels. So I think I'd just say, maybe see what happens and see how you feel as you go on with the process. I hope some of that is helpful and thanks again for the question, it's great to hear from you.

@ thanks so much for your response, very helpful. I do like the payment scale and I think you’re right regarding the motivation to pursue what we like. Thanks a lot!

@ you’re very welcome, let me know how it all goes if you feel like it

Hi Lee, thanks so much for your comments, really appreciate what you say and the feedback generally. I shall pass it on to James too. Yes, embracing uselessness is great isn't it. As men, it's often a common theme of having to 'know' in situations. Very liberating to see that's not always necessary and, in fact, to not know can be the most helpful thing we can do for someone. I agree about the term 'intimate stranger' too. I remember someone saying that therapy is 'intimacy without risks' and, although it's certainly potentially risky in terms of vulnerability and trust, I can see something in that idea too. Yes, I think there certain things which 99% of the population would respond or react to in the same way and to that extent I can see we're made to feel it, just by nature of being human with a nervous system! As you say, our response or reaction can then be more under our control though. Thanks again and really look forward to speaking to you soon : )

You’re very welcome about the content, thanks for saying, I’m grateful. Re full-time courses, to my knowledge, accredited psychotherapy courses are 4 years part-time. There are, I think, counselling courses though that are more intensive and possibly over significantly shorter periods of time. I don’t know much about them though. Maybe if anyone reading this does, they can provide some more information in these comments?

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP Thanks JP! Yes it makes sense most of part time - I have managed to find one full time / intensives that are based in London. How did you arrive at which modality you wanted to train in without prior/limited knowledge before committing?

Great, I'm glad to hear you've found a course that works for you. In terms of modality, I went for an integrative course, which is what seems to be around most now, so you get a range of approaches. One thing I've seen since qualifying is that you can go and learn about lots of other techniques and modalities too, so the type of therapist that you are will probably be developing all the time.

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP appreciate it thank you!

Thanks for your feedback, kind of you, I really appreciate it. My clients are mostly privately funded, just a few insurance. Drawbacks with insurance companies are a lower hourly rate for me and some extra admin, but there are of course some benefits too

Thanks so much Rich, I’m glad you enjoyed it and very grateful for your feedback. I shall pass it on to James too. Will hopefully be doing more about men specifically in the future 😊

Thank you so much for your comment, I really appreciate it and agree with everything you say. And thanks for your work with the charity!

Hi there, thanks for your comment. Such an interesting point. I’d actually like to talk about that on the channel if you were ever interested, ie, eco therapy generally and the benefits it can have (particularly for men too). Just let me know 😊

I do really know what you mean, but there are definitely those more loving people are out there in my experience and you deserve to find them

Yes I completely agree, expectations that often seemed to ignore a lawyer’s humanity in my experience. Definitely tired of it myself after some years. Thank you for commenting, I appreciate it

Thank you so much, really kind of you to say and I appreciate it 😊

Thanks so much for saying, I really appreciate it. Glad you enjoyed it!

Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it. It raises a great question I think, ie, what are the qualities needed to be a successful therapist. I think it’s such an interesting and important question that I’m going to record my next video on it and will mention this comment if that’s ok. In the process of thinking about it, I’ve listed 10 qualities that, to me, are important and I see around me a lot in the therapy world. In terms a couple of specifics you mention in your comment, firstly about what you’re like around people, I do believe that that might change as you got further into the training and also, yes, I think the training does often significantly change how we see ourselves and others. These replies don’t allow much more in terms of exploration of things, but, as I say, I’m going to record a video on it, so do look out for it and, again, thank you so much for your comment!

That’s great that you’ve found something you’d love to do and thank you for commenting. I’ve tried to cover most aspects of becoming and being a therapist in all the videos on this channel, so please do take a look at as many of them that interest you. I also provide one to one sessions looking at career change and how to become a therapist if that would be of interest? Are you in the UK by the way? If so, I can also suggest some websites that might help you.

Well I am learning to be we will learning each other

Hey 👋

Your partner?

Thank you so much for saying, I’m glad you found it helpful and I really appreciate your comment!

No thanks, all taken care of

Thanks so much Richard and totally agree about the 70! Amazing isn’t it, I did say that to Bob after we’d finished recording 😊 Thanks again for the comment, I’m really glad you liked it and hopefully we can catch up soon

You are so welcome, really glad you enjoyed it and thanks for your lovely comments, they’re much appreciated. I’ve passed them on to Bob too. Such a lovely story about Malawi, I can imagine it. Music is one of my favourite things and the piano is actually my favourite instrument! Out of interest, what was the piano piece you played? Would be great to listen to it

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP Nice that you also enjoy piano music. The piece I played was Una Mattina by Ludovico Einaudi

@@advancedpianojourney7641 thanks, I’ll have a listen 😊

Just listening to it, really beautiful, thank you!

Thank you so much 😊

Yes think that’s a really good point. I’m still working on it myself, but for me it’s a combination of making sure it’s the ‘right’ people for me in terms of their psychological ‘type’ and then consciously reminding myself to invest in the friendship, whatever that looks like. I’m someone who has needed to learn it though after early experiences. I can see it’s worth it though and things do naturally happen over time too. I hope it’s going ok for you and thanks for your comment 😊

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP I really relate with this comment!!! Every part of it, yeah. And finding the right people seems super critical, I’d probably rather have one or two good people in my corner than a bunch of loose connections. I’ve learned to become more of an initiator and have been pushing myself to reach out first, organize plans first, etc :) Have a beautiful day! 😊

@@our.secret1130 sounds great you too 😊 yes, ‘a few good people’

You’re very welcome and thank you for saying, I appreciate it

That’s amazing to hear, thanks so much for saying, I really appreciate it. Definitely struggled myself at times during the training, there’s so much involved on all levels, but it was absolutely worth it for me to do this every day. Let me know how it’s going if you feel like it and I really wish you all the best with it

Hi there, this is such a lovely message, reading it made my day, I really appreciate it. So good to hear you found it helpful and very kind of you to say, it’s definitely a comment like this that means I carry with the content! 😊

Absolutely!

Thank you so much for saying that, I really appreciate it. Definitely a comment like this that encourages me to carry on!

Hi, thanks for your question, I thought it was one I’d get asked much more often when I started out. I answer it as fully as I can in my video ‘Why I changed career from lawyer to therapist’ on here so you’re really welcome to take a look at that if you’d like. Generally re income, I’m a therapist in private practice in a comparably pretty wealthy area in the UK. I earn more than enough to enjoy my life and also have the time to able to make sure some of my life’s best experiences are good relationships, which wasn’t really possible for me personally as a City lawyer. I know that lots of therapists in the UK do earn relatively low amounts, see also my video on here about what therapists can earn in the UK where I talk about it. I’ve tried to get people to come on the channel for a couple of years now to talk about it all and present a balanced view, but no has agreed to come on unfortunately. If you know anyone that would like to come on to talk about their different experience in terms of income etc, that would be amazing. I’d also generally love to hear what the industry is like in the US. In any event, thanks again for your comments, John-Paul

Thanks Richard, I thought you’d like it : )

Thanks for saying, I appreciate it and your support as ever : )

That’s so great to hear, thanks for saying, I really appreciate it. It’s a comment like this that motivates me to keep going with the channel. So glad you’re enjoying the program and let me know how it’s going if you ever feel like it again in the future : )

@JohnPaulDaviesTTP I'll totally keep you updated. You've got a great channel so keep doing what you're doing!

Thank you, will do 😊

Hi Lee, thanks so much for your comments, I’m really grateful for them. Interesting to hear that context in terms of Buddhist teachings, I wasn’t aware of that. I think issues around honesty are much more significant psychologically than we might hear in the wellbeing and mental health world generally. I’m going to keep it much more in mind. Thanks also for the examples from your relationship and how it might work in practice, it’s definitely a nuanced issue too! Wonder if at some point we could talk about it on the channel maybe : ) Anyway, thanks as ever for your comments and support and I hope things are going well for you.

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP Hi John-Paul, yes I think it’s a very significant topic, and the link between how honest we are with others and how honest we are with ourselves cannot be ignored. I think people can get into all sorts of mental gymnastics through dishonesty, and the lines between truth and falsehood become so blurred, both externally and internally. It’s much easier to be dishonest with others if we’ve first been dishonest with ourselves. Always happy to contribute to the channel!

@@leebus99 totally agree with everything you say Lee, yes, one of the main reasons people struggle to trust others is because they’re not often able to trust themselves. If you ever feel like coming on to have a chat about this or anything else, just let me know, based on how you write, I think it would work really well : ) Thanks again for your time commenting, I appreciate it

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP Hi John-Paul, sounds great, I’ll drop you an email.

Ah ok, thanks for clarifying, that’s helpful, I appreciate it

Thanks so much Richard, really appreciate your support as ever. I’ll take a look at what you say about empathy on Substack, I saw your recent post on the cost of training on there which I thought was really helpful. I’m sure a lot of people will also be interested in that. Yes, ideas like you suggest about letting go of your own thoughts and feelings are the kind of things that I think would be useful for people to hear. Many of us don’t consciously notice what we’re doing in these situations I think and it can really get in the way of connecting Thanks again for what you say and I look forward to sharing the content with you over the next few months. Maybe we can collaborate again together at some point 😊 Hope things are going well with you

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTPthanks, JP. Would be great to collaborate on something in the near future.

@@richardcampbell9283 great, I have a couple of ideas based on things you’ve written about recently, but would love to hear your ideas too, so let’s speak soon

Hi there, you’re very welcome about the video, thanks for saying. Not at all too late in my view no, I think it’s a great age to come in to the profession. Genuinely never too late in my view! It’s an interesting point you raise though. Some people are concerned about being too young, others too old. Hopefully it’ll come up in conversations with other therapists on the channel, but thanks for raising it and I’ll definitely try to include it somewhere in future videos.

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP Thank you very much for sharing your view. It’s very encouraging! I will be looking forward to more videos from you.

@@yuliyatkacheva2059 That’s great, thank you!

Thank you so much, glad you enjoyed it and I really appreciate you saying

You're so welcome and thanks so much for saying, I really appreciate it. Hope the training journey is going well! I’ll be speaking to another trainee therapist in the next month or so on the channel so that may be of interest as well

Hi there, thank so much for your comment and, yes, I completely agree with what you say. It’s just as relevant to someone who’s in a same sex relationship. The reason I did the straight relationship was purely because that was the piece I was asked to contribute focussed on. I wonder also whether that might be because statistically most bi people are in ‘opposite’ sex relationships. As I say though, I think it’s a great point you make and thank you for making it. I’d love to speak to someone on the channel who’s in a same sex relationship in this situation, and/or read their story out, so hopefully that happens and more of a range of experiences can be represented, John-Paul

I’m not familiar with Freud’s thoughts on this, it would be great if you could add some of his ideas here though, I’m sure people would find that really helpful and interesting. Thanks for your comment

@@JohnPaulDaviesTTP I think she means my dog Freud, he sometimes interrupts my livestreams looking for attention 🐕

Ah, thanks for clarifying, a very welcome guest I’m sure 😊

Love indeed 😊🙏

Thanks for your message, I hope you can figure it out soon too. From my own personal experience, training to be and becoming a therapist really gave me the sense of meaning, purpose and drive I was looking for in career and life. I’m not sure where you are, but I wonder if there are even free introductory courses to therapy or counselling available to you, so you can get more of an idea of what it would be like? Have to say though, sounds like you’ve been in therapy a lot and that’s what mostly made me go towards it as a career, so it sounds like you’ve had plenty of good experience already. As I say, I really hope you find what you’re looking for and if you want to message me again just to let me know how it’s all going, please don’t hesitate to. Also, if you’d like me to record a video on a particular subject, just let me know. Thanks again, John-Paul

I’m so glad you found the channel too and thanks for saying, what a lovely post, it was really touching. Really pleased for you at hopefully beginning your training, do let me know how it all goes if you feel like it. Also of course happy to record any videos about topics that might come up for you along the way 😊 Thanks again!

Thanks for what say, I really appreciate it, it’s a comment like this that makes me carry on producing videos. I’m glad so much resonated with you and yes, I think it’s so important that that part, along with any part of us, isn’t left alone. As to what happens to the romantic/sexual part in a monogamous ‘straight’ relationship, well, I’d love to hear people’s experiences, it’s an interesting one. Thanks again for your comments and if you’d like me to record a video on anything else on the subject, just let me know 😊

You’re welcome, I started when I was about 36

❤️

Thanks so much for saying, I really appreciate it. Great to read at least some of your story and, yes, although the industries were different, it sounds like we’ve had quite a similar experience with the career. I’d really encourage to look into it all further, which it sounds like you’re drawn to doing anyway. Let me know if you have any questions you’d like me to answer on the channel and I wish you all the best with it generally. Would love to hear how it all goes too if you feel like it. Thanks again, John-Paul

Really glad it was helpful and thanks for commenting, I appreciate it. Best of luck with the course and feel free to let me know how it’s all going if you’d like to. Thanks again!

Hi there, thanks so much for your comment, I really don’t think that’s too old at all no. It’s a job that someone can do till they’re much older I think and there’s a life of experience that will be very helpful for clients I’m sure. You’ll have something unique to offer to clients that no one else can. I really wish you all the best with it if you do decide to go ahead.