Why God may have You in a Relationship with a Narcissist

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ธ.ค. 2024

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  • @ShaneenMegji
    @ShaneenMegji  ปีที่แล้ว +30

    If you found this video helpful, join me on Nov 8th, 2023, for my live webinar: How to Accelerate Your Healing After Narcissistic Abuse. This free webinar will equip you with five practical keys you can apply right away to become your fully healed and free self. www.shaneenmegji.com/accelerate_your_healing_webinar

    • @paulinebrown1050
      @paulinebrown1050 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I don't believe that why God want you with satan

    • @chinwenduchinwe586
      @chinwenduchinwe586 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ​@@paulinebrown1050
      No, G-d does not want us under satan.

    • @amandaforsythe3729
      @amandaforsythe3729 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      She's not saying it's God's choice. It is our decision and we make mistakes or sin,.but through our sin we take a lesson. They are manipulative and God forgives our sins. Let's face it, we all had signs from God something wasn't right, and we disobeyed his teaching. I was taken off my path with God and lost that closeness but I missed it and I needed emotional maturity. All these things she mentioned I was weak in and became stronger. I needed the lessons. He brought me back to God and I really learned to obey the bible more. She's saying purpose in pain. Our decisions and sin causes us pain, but God can turn it into a blessing because he loves us that much.

  • @lindalong7460
    @lindalong7460 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1799

    I was married to a narcissist for 38 years. He made me feel worthless, a failure. And no matter what I did, it was never good enough for him. He sought perfection because he was. We raised 5 beautiful children that have issues now of not feeling worthy. God has blessed us with those children who I love very much. They know that they can talk to me about anything. I do not judge or criticize, they got that from their father! I’ve been divorced for 5 years now and in that 5 years, I’ve discovered that I’m not the worthless person I was told that I was. I hated myself, but no longer do. God has opened my eyes and God has given me many blessings. I’ve grown closer to God in my time of living alone. I think when you’re away from a situation, you can see what it really was and I’m much happier! And I have lots of alone time with God. 😇

    • @theresefournier3269
      @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      YAHsome!

    • @ido2ido2
      @ido2ido2 3 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Thank you for sharing. This gives me hope. Cheryl.

    • @HealthyLifestyled788
      @HealthyLifestyled788 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Amen, keep praying for your children .

    • @80sbaby90
      @80sbaby90 3 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      How did you survive that for 38 years? 😩

    • @janicemurphy4373
      @janicemurphy4373 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      I CAN CERTAINLY RELATE, THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR SHARING!!!!!

  • @theresefournier3269
    @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +318

    It's a life lesson.
    Not a life sentence!

    • @a.w.3689
      @a.w.3689 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Yes, it's a lesson, however, it felt at times, it was a life sentence, and even like death row. Thank God he has set me free from that man, praise the Lord!!! 😉😄😊☺

    • @bellarainbow4296
      @bellarainbow4296 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Need to be careful here. Make WISE decisions especially staying around TOXIC people. What does bible say? If it's possible live at peace with everyone. However it's not possible to be at peace with a narcissist, they're often provoking urguments and conflict. The word also says to stay away from people who cause conflicts.
      There's different types of narcissistic people. YES some are murders n can kill, when someone has strangled you n threatened to kill you? Why stay around or have contact with them, even if you have kids with them.
      There's only one way, run, forgive ask ABBA to heal and restore your soul and move on with your life.

    • @JustMe-fz4ik
      @JustMe-fz4ik 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I agree

    • @theresefournier3269
      @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@a.w.3689 i so know what you mean! Much love and myriads of blessings your way!

    • @80sbaby90
      @80sbaby90 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      It feels like a life sentence ☹️

  • @music292929
    @music292929 ปีที่แล้ว +204

    My relationship with the narc hurt me so bad that I clung to God and He comforted and healed me. He gave me a dream actually showing me the narcissists heart…it was very needy, desperate and broken. Like “depths of despair” broken. When I woke He said “He is incapable of loving you”.
    I’m thankful that this experience brought me close to God. He will never allow pain without a purpose.

    • @diedonnerfrau7565
      @diedonnerfrau7565 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      True, that. I now understand better who my dad was to me as well. If I had been genuinely loved by my earthly father, I would have chosen a husband who genuinely loved me. But, for the times that both of them did what they did as narc bullies, it drove me away from them and toward the One True Father, the God who loves me

    • @lynnsallander9618
      @lynnsallander9618 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This is very useful !❤

    • @n23391
      @n23391 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      God is able to bind up the wounds and heal the broken hearted. in that state they can not love you and there are demons behind narcissism that have to be cast out . Also there is a saying narcissism is our reward for our idolatry. We should always put God first and I had to learn that hard way and please God not people

    • @sonyareyes1000
      @sonyareyes1000 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That's what I need to know to go...

    • @wuthomas5914
      @wuthomas5914 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Wow i needed to see this. Now that explains everything. Thank you. I feel at peace now

  • @elenabogdan3874
    @elenabogdan3874 2 ปีที่แล้ว +429

    One good thing that comes out of a narcissist relationship is learning to discern character and learning how to deal with and/or avoid such people as much as possible.
    As painful as it was, there are things I would have never learned had I never encountered a narcissist.

    • @marytaylor9504
      @marytaylor9504 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      You A Truly Correct!!! Wisdom about them!!!

    • @websurfer5772
      @websurfer5772 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yep. It's been painfully eye-opening, but I wouldn't want to still be asleep as that would have made my life way worse.

    • @tinasmith7630
      @tinasmith7630 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yes n learning Truth frm lies.

    • @kerrytaggart8206
      @kerrytaggart8206 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thank you. Needed this. I study scripture, KJV. What your teaching resonated with me and gave me clarity.

    • @websurfer5772
      @websurfer5772 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@kerrytaggart8206 Yep. It definitely fits with Christian teaching. Keep being discerning.

  • @Dopendekhang
    @Dopendekhang 2 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his way and entangle yourself in a snare.
    Proverb 22 : 25-25 English standard version 2016 (ESV)

  • @stephaniemoneke8434
    @stephaniemoneke8434 2 ปีที่แล้ว +502

    Sometimes God will allow you to get into a relationship with them to make you see that you only need God in your life to give you true satisfaction and contentment. The reason why we are codependent is because there is a void that we are looking for someone or something to fill at all cost . Thank you for this video it was an eye opener xx

    • @anneliseromine1161
      @anneliseromine1161 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That's what I'm learning as I'm divorcing my husband of 10 years who is a "Christian" narcissist. It allowed me to learn that I need to trust in Jesus alone and put Him first and we have 2 children together who are beautiful creations of God and I am very blessed to have them as daughters.

    • @tulsibloom
      @tulsibloom ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Agreed!

    • @GoodDay-ox1el
      @GoodDay-ox1el ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yes!❤

    • @carolinenjoroge1195
      @carolinenjoroge1195 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Sure we make people idols

    • @LightofLucifer-m8q
      @LightofLucifer-m8q ปีที่แล้ว

      God can't satisfy you sexually. You can't wrap your arms around him.and cuddle on a rainy night.

  • @marywolfe6598
    @marywolfe6598 3 ปีที่แล้ว +401

    I didn't get inner peace from being with a narcissist, instead I got ulcers, depression and anxiety, severe trust issues, etc. This was NOT Gods will!!!!! Get out people when you can!

    • @dreamsofturtles1828
      @dreamsofturtles1828 2 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      My mother was a narcissist. I grew up thinking i was the worst person in the world. I have an autoimmune disease that i believe was caused by my abusive childhood. I am afraid of people, i get triggered easily and i have CPTSD. I am 65 years old and still working on it. I ask God all the time to help me. I am making progress but its very slow. Sometimes i look at other people and wonder what its like to have a loving family and friends. I feel so alone all the time- thats how i grew up. Alone and hated.

    • @Crystalquartz964
      @Crystalquartz964 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@dreamsofturtles1828 Me too. Sending you love and keep healing!

    • @dreamsofturtles1828
      @dreamsofturtles1828 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@Crystalquartz964 And you also. I pray for your healing back to Light & Love.

    • @TaylorsSurvivalGuide
      @TaylorsSurvivalGuide 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      She not saying to stay in it ?? She giving insight on those who question “why me?” …

    • @huldahebenezer7004
      @huldahebenezer7004 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I ended up with breast cancer....

  • @ilonazink7864
    @ilonazink7864 3 ปีที่แล้ว +772

    The 6th advantage God told me about dealings with a narcissist is that everytime you overcome the toxic narcissistic relationship, you gain authority over that principality.

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      Good word! Amen. 🙏🏽

    • @RonkeAlao
      @RonkeAlao 3 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      Jesus already gave you authority over principalities. You don't need to expose yourself to toxic human's in other to "gain" authority

    • @diedonnerfrau7565
      @diedonnerfrau7565 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      True, that. No weapon formed against us shall prosper. Isaiah 54:17.

    • @Second_Son1990
      @Second_Son1990 3 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      @@RonkeAlao That’s true. But sometimes, people will never understand that until they have no choice but to

    • @tam4givin
      @tam4givin 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That was not God telling you that! You do not overcome a toxic relationship you get out.

  • @elenabogdan3874
    @elenabogdan3874 2 ปีที่แล้ว +190

    1) Own your truth and reality by bringing any accusations before the Lord;
    2) Detach and don’t take personally the things the narcs do to you; you are not them nor are you defined by them;
    3) Retreat into God’s Sanctuary for protection and strength,
    4) Toughen up and don’t let the Narcs affect your self worth; reaffirm your value before the Lord and your identity in Christ;
    5) Stay close to the Lord for wisdom, direction, and strength.

    • @arisebellefire16
      @arisebellefire16 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I love this ❤❤❤❤❤ God bless you and Thank you for sharing!!

    • @Eman-vp5wk
      @Eman-vp5wk ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Truth

    • @sheri2845
      @sheri2845 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Lovely. Thank you.

    • @jenniferjennyjen211
      @jenniferjennyjen211 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amen and thank you.

    • @gigiw.7650
      @gigiw.7650 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thank you! 💕

  • @starlingswallow
    @starlingswallow 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I stayed for 14 years. He claimed he was a believer in Christ, but near the end, he would cuss God out and flick God off as I bawled my eyes out. He loved making me cry, staring at me from the other side of the room, glaring at me. Never once did he comfort me or hold me...it was hellish. Can you imagine being with your spouse all those years and NEVER being comforted???
    I have learned SO much through that hell, and I've come to realize my father is a covert Narc, and my mom and siblings are his enablers. This is so painful but God has been teaching and growing me so much!! I now have an identity in Him! I have boundaries! I have self worth and self love ♥️ The Godly kind 😊
    I am remarried to an amazing man and we pray for the Narcs in our lives and pasts every day. We are both scapegoats of our families and still we are learning so much good stuff!
    God is amazing....I see a lot of what God was and IS teaching me.
    He never left me in that nightmare existence. When I would bawl my eyes out on the floor of the bathroom, I felt His presence and thanked Him for whatever it was He was doing in me and around me. I am in awe of God everyday! When I left the ex Narc, He showered me with blessings!
    Readers, if you are married to a narcissist, pray to God for HIM to end your relationship. I asked God for a green light~ and the next day: there it was! My ex randomly brought up me going to jail for our back taxes (the ones HE would not let me pay) and the business he had made me open in MY NAME!! 😢😮 Rose colored glasses were slapped off my face with that comment.
    Cling to Jesus, throw yourself at His mercy and wait on Him to move you through the situation!
    Praying for all of you!

  • @marinahull8470
    @marinahull8470 3 ปีที่แล้ว +549

    Just recently I told my husband “ Thank you to make me SO lonely with you that I started go to church EVERY Sunday and found THERE REAL joy and peace of my mind and soul. Thank you to make me lonely that I started go to YMCA to swim pool, that help me improve my health and lose weight. Thank you to make me so lonely, that I built up relationship with MYSELF. I no need man or husband for to be happy. I can sit in coffee shop alone and enjoy cup of coffee and be totally content with it. Thank you to make me so lonely that if tomorrow you will disappear I will NOT even notice this “
    If I would be married with other man , I would be probably still shallow believer and be in church just once a while.

    • @eveningprimrose3088
      @eveningprimrose3088 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      I'm so glad your husband/narc lets you go out.

    • @kiabrooks1472
      @kiabrooks1472 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      😂I started taking my relationship with God more seriously too.

    • @jessitabonita
      @jessitabonita 3 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      Beautiful story!
      Isn't it funny how when we ask God for a man who leads us to God, we mean one who humbly walks in the Spirit with and has beliefs and behaviors that are congruent with Scripture...
      But then we end up with a wicked man who is nothing but that and has us turn to God like a little child runs (and cries!) to her father.
      And thank God for that! I'd rather be single, saved by Christ and hungry for righteousness than married to an unsaved ungodly man just to superficially force my desire to be a wife - and end up regretting it.
      Let us be wise as serpents and harmless as doves! 💛

    • @wendythomas4930
      @wendythomas4930 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Amen, Ms. Marina. Have a beautiful life, strong lady.😊

    • @CandiGiampi
      @CandiGiampi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      The more God is the forefront of your life seems to repel them to some extent.

  • @feathers34
    @feathers34 3 ปีที่แล้ว +548

    When i was in a relationship with a Narcissist, i wanted out desperately. I leaned on God , cried out to God and hung onto Gods promise of "you are MORE than a conqueror, you ARE an OVERCOMER"!!!! Never forget that last part. And you know, God was right as usual. I am no contact with that Narc and feeling closer to my Lord than ever. He was there for me and He did not leave me or forsake me......

    • @EdwardsEvelyn
      @EdwardsEvelyn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Relationship? So you was not married to the person? If not, you were living in fornication which is sin. Glad God got you out.
      She answered, “No one, Lord!” And Jesus said, “I do not condemn you either. Go. From now on sin no more.”]
      John 8:11 AMP

    • @astrialindah2773
      @astrialindah2773 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@EdwardsEvelyn seriously? A relationship could be a person of the same sex.. you know like a girlfriend.. a friend a buddy.. come on now.. or a relationship could actually be a marriage..

    • @bonitasmith6064
      @bonitasmith6064 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Amen and Amen. My experience exactly. That experience with the narcissist brought me closer to God. Thankful I have knowledge about narcissist and I won't go through it again. Thank you God for saving me 🙏🦾💯👋😇

    • @23angelpie
      @23angelpie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@astrialindah2773 yes, I agree why jump to fornication right away? I think that is what is in Evelyns mind. or heart.

    • @23angelpie
      @23angelpie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@EdwardsEvelyn Shame on your assumptions. Must be what is in YOUR mind!

  • @debsanasi1590
    @debsanasi1590 2 ปีที่แล้ว +317

    Be mindful that narcissists often have a distorted view of reality and their accusations are often just incorrect. I spent 15 years ‘taking on board’ my narcissistic husband’s accusations and trying to improve myself- only to finally realise his accusations were false accusations. I was freed. I no longer had to live under the burden of his condemnation. Best realisation EVER!!

    • @margaretboehm4485
      @margaretboehm4485 2 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      I've discovered that what they accuse you of, are actually confessions of what they are doing themselves!! Or what they are thinking.. or what their morals and values are ..etc. Very toxic 😓

    • @sinaidaepp2972
      @sinaidaepp2972 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Thank you so much for that video.
      Man istead of helping to heal in love, blaimed with a content: you destroyed your life, you have nothing left, your words are empty, you dont have a heart, you are a lier, you are destructive, you are negative and you will never manage.
      These are points to work at. But the love is mussing there. People heal in love. That man showed very well good points to work at. To get decernrment, selfllove, selfcontrol and love of God and guiding by Holly Spirit.
      So greatful for the spiritual phychologiest i was searching for decades.
      God bless you for your godly work!!!

    • @pollytheparrot8929
      @pollytheparrot8929 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yea.. Ur right.. I'm stuck with my narc family. . Wen I told my mom, wen I got molested, she blamed, shamed me!! I told her I'm Ashamed to call her my mom! They r just pathetic 😞😤😡

    • @Lexlexg23
      @Lexlexg23 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Congratulations to you and your peace I know the future is full of mystery I'm optimistic to remain sane it's success stories that bring the power to keep on keeping on. Thank you deb

    • @theacroguitarist322
      @theacroguitarist322 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes, anything that doesn’t serve them directly will be labeled a “flaw” even if it’s actually a great trait that will make you successful. They only want you to succeed within their agenda. So if you’re about to reach success with something that doesn’t serve them, makes them jealous, and gives you boundaries from them, they will call that a glow and degrade the crap out of you for it. So you have to think objectively about WHY exactly they are pointing out your flaws. There could be some truth to that and point out something you should fix in yourself, or it could be purely because they feel threatened.

  • @radiance65
    @radiance65 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    You are so correct. Through my marriage to a narcissist, I have been delivered of an obsessive need for privacy, (my narcissist broadcasted all my "faults" throughout our small community). My reactions to his extreme provocation, led me to discover that I suffer from PTSD from childhood experiences. Without him I may never have uncovered this or received the help I am currently getting. He has strengthened my ability to stand in the face of evil, to reject his evil assessment of me and stand strong in my identity in Christ. In giving everything over to God, I have learned to accept my powerlessness and to know that when I am weak God is strong. And most importantly of all, I have dug deeper in my faith to believe God for my husband's complete deliverance and healing. I believe my marriage is the training ground and preparation for ministry and I believe my husband and I will serve the Lord together in unity, a living testimony of His power and His grace.

    • @Girlibra1
      @Girlibra1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amen

    • @MrFoulosophe
      @MrFoulosophe 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      You are still with your narcissist husband ? He did repent ?

    • @radiance65
      @radiance65 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @MrFoulosophe Still waiting on the Lord. I have good strong boundaries in place but only the Lord can bring him to His knees.

    • @danyalleking6829
      @danyalleking6829 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Amen

  • @deanne7718
    @deanne7718 2 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    I love the positive twist on encounters with narcs. I have learn of my toxic empathy that feels too much of others while disregarding my needs. I also became aware of my codependency. The need to help those that don't want or ask for my help; all the while neglecting my own need for help. It's like a martyr syndrome, so to speak.
    Thanks for your encouragement 🙏🏽 😊

    • @DaughteroftheKing67
      @DaughteroftheKing67 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Exactly! My whole life I’ve placed others above me, thought people were my friends when they were in reality just acquaintances. Through this very difficult relationship with a fellow veteran who I’ve been caregiver for for about a yr is that I am really learning not to try to help people who do not want your help. Learning that my feelings and needs are just as valid as anyone else’s and I can still deal with people in that godly manner without pushing myself down or allowing others to do so. Learning to distance myself from my emotions, to not be triggered every time and becoming stronger in the LORD. He IS my moment to moment strength. I do not lean to my own understanding because I realize I do not understand anything the way I thought I did. Thank You Father for the trials and hardships of this life which cause me to long more and more for home. Soon we will join you but until then I trust in You for everything.

  • @womanatthewell9603
    @womanatthewell9603 3 ปีที่แล้ว +566

    I’ve learned that I attracted this type of relationship was because of co-dependence. God doesn’t want us to need other people or depend on others for our value and worth. Learning to break codependency has been a lesson learned. I suspect most people in a narc relationship have reasons for attracting them in the first place. Character traits of learning the ability to speak my truth, morals and values instead of having so much unhealthy empathy towards toxic people that leads them to believe I am a good source of supply for them.

    • @Godlywoman88
      @Godlywoman88 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      This has been my journey as well- coming from codependent/narcisstic family dynamics.

    • @Sandra-bx6yy
      @Sandra-bx6yy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Maybe it was always within you, lying dormant.
      Being with the narcissist meant that you had to turn inwards for answers.
      You grew in strength, courage and conviction and became who you were called to be!
      It was/is a frightening experience to go through, but God wouldn't have allowed it, without providing the necessary tools/support to get through it!

    • @samismael4422
      @samismael4422 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Well said. This is what I’m learning too

    • @Italiana72787
      @Italiana72787 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Wow, so true! Thanks for sharing. I see how easily my reliance on him gave him the power to emotionally control me. I have to own my codependency is my own form of trying to control things I’m not in control of either and heal the wounded parts of myself

    • @kynathomas4809
      @kynathomas4809 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same here.

  • @racineburke2561
    @racineburke2561 3 ปีที่แล้ว +292

    This was my mindset and he actually brought me closer to Christ and made me take my walk with Jesus Christ more seriously. Now I'm in an amazing place and keep growing in my faith. I prayer for him though because it's sad that people actually have this kind of capability to be so wicked.

    • @carolclowes2221
      @carolclowes2221 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Exactly same happened to me
      I now have a relationship with Jesus which I didn't have before

    • @danherrmann8755
      @danherrmann8755 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Your commentary is so true on covert Narsacistic person. My problem is I did not see the big red flag. Her opioid addiction she has been seeing a phsyciatrist with sleep problem Addiction induced by a doctor. This lead to her stealing or taking maybe borrowing from her mother’s opioid medication. 22 years this went on. I just found out August 2021 that Doctor Sutton was running a pill mill operation. He has polluted 5 family members with this drug. Drug enforcement agency moved in and the doctor shut his practice down and left town. The family thinks it is still ok they are on the opioid addiction they eat this drug like candy. Opioid addiction will change the DNA in the brain and create a Narsacistic person that will ruin any relationship or family. I have learned the hard way. She will not get help. So I must move on. With my life. Opioid pandemic is worse than Covid. More people are dying or loosing there minds from this drug. It is a shame what man has done to man. God stated trust no man. So true. I can only pray. I can not fight the devil. Satan is to powerful and slick with his tricks. Look what the devil has gone to American society. Made the doctors the biggest drug dealers there is. Insurance companies paying for the drugs. People getting killed by car accidents or shootings. The devil has control of the people we are suppose to trust running our country and health care. What a mess. God bless us all Later.

    • @RealMe-je9yh
      @RealMe-je9yh 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@danherrmann8755 Dan: I'm sorry but I have to speak out and tell you that you are seriously misled in your "opinion" about opioid medications. - And most definitely opioids do NOT cause narcissism! - Please educate yourself on opioid medications (and Narcissism!). When used properly, opioid medications are actually life saving medications for millions upon millions of people with chronic and intractable pain. Are there bad doctors? Yes - on both ends of the spectrum. Are there pill mills? Used to be but majority have been closed down by DEA years ago. Are there people who get addicted? Yes, But, most people who become addicted have a propensity to addiction (genetic or just enjoy getting high). There is so much research out there - seems more against opioid medications (⚠️look closely tho as these people are profiting off their opinions - ex: Andrew Kolodny, P.R.O.P., etc.). There is also good research out there. Please check out PainNewsNetwork.org; Claudia A. Merandi on Twitter; thedoctorpatientforum.com; Dr. Forest Tennant, MD, and, IntractablePainSyndrome.com, for just a few reputable resources for the TRUTH about opioid medications, their benefits for the pain community, and what the DEA, CDC, DOJ, etc., have and are doing to pain patients, and their doctors, who legitimately use opioid pain medications bc THEY HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE but to use them (ie: they have tried all other modalities without relief or little relief). You can find more sites to search just from these few.
      I'm not diminishing anyone's heartache over the loss of someone to overdose or addiction. It does happen (but, in the pain community, addiction is very minuscule in relation to the number of people who have to take opioid meds) - and overdose and/or addiction IS heartbreaking. However, there is more help out there for the recreational drug users and the addicted than there is legit help for the pain community - who are just trying to get legitimate doctors to treat their pain conditions and medications to be able to live with their diseases that cause them pain (at no fault of their own - just like a diabetic needs insulin.)
      Further, people are being misled about the so-called "opioid crisis". It is actually a "street drug crisis" and those Gov't agencies are using the pain community and their doctors as scapegoats instead of going after the real problem - the drug cartels! As the pain community and their pain doctors continue to suffer - in sooo many different ways - mostly from misinformation and outright FALSE information (to be able to pad their pocketbooks).
      Please take my comment as a sincere form of disagreement in an attempt to show you there are different sides to every argument/story. This is in no way an attack on you or your loved ones. I wish you the best.

    • @SSFDeliverance
      @SSFDeliverance 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I totally agree that we can grow from such a relationship. However, my question for you is...are you still in the relationship now that you're closer to Christ? If not, did your new relationship with Christ give you the strength to leave?

    • @danherrmann8755
      @danherrmann8755 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Baptized at age 60 was the best part of my life. This is how God pulled me out of the disfunctional relationship. God knew what she was doing and her opioid addiction is out of hand. Eduction on life’s problems will heal the soul and start a new journey in life. I just pray she gets help and not have to suffer from the drug addiction. A lie is a lie to your self and everybody else. God bless later.

  • @cm1368
    @cm1368 2 ปีที่แล้ว +163

    What the devil means for evil, God means for good!!! Thank you for making this point. I think you are absolutely correct. I am a living witness. I grew spiritually and drew closer to the Holy Spirit while enduring narcissistic challenges.

    • @mickieharrell2247
      @mickieharrell2247 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thank you so much for the confirmation that i needed. I have been with a narcissist for 35 yrs. He now has bone cancer. I recently realized some of the points made in this video about myself and I will make it !
      My Moms last words to me were "dont let him break you " . And I haven't ! Not sayin it hasnt been tough...thanks be to our Heavenly Father and a God fearing Mother.
      Thanks again for the confirmation !

    • @sueshardy5084
      @sueshardy5084 ปีที่แล้ว

      Six yrs into marriage and finding out he’s a full blown covert narcissist. If not for the ongoing work, guidance and comfort of the Holy Spirit I couldn’t deal with it, regardless of much I love this man. Some days can be tough.

  • @boog5966
    @boog5966 2 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    I'm a billionaire...4 years of a narcissist...it just about killed me.. but I made through thank you Lord... Amen

    • @syedaliimam931
      @syedaliimam931 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Give me job

    • @nunofigueira8691
      @nunofigueira8691 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Give me a job, I really need work after broke up my marriage with this person.

    • @tsietsanerampai4691
      @tsietsanerampai4691 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Please buy me a bachelor house so that I flee from the abuse. I am in a foreign country and have been looking for work, I'm still waiting.

    • @verafides9
      @verafides9 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Boog...I hope you're doing very well today and have healed from that experience. It was a blessing to see your comment. I keep thinking money is all I need to escape, but knowing a billionaire got caught in the trap too tells me money isn't the only way...I would love to hear your story, the mental and emotional journey you went through. If you have your story posted anywhere, please let me know where I can watch, read, or listen!

  • @yvonnes7412
    @yvonnes7412 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    God doesn’t orchestrate bad things, but He is always with us and can help us, even help us escape, heal, and learn…

    • @MyTubey101
      @MyTubey101 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Facts, that’s James 1:13 haha

  • @wildpshare1316
    @wildpshare1316 3 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    I was with a narc. No contact now. But, I miss my 2 kids. She took them away from my life and stopped me seeing them completely. Please pray for me and for my 2 little kids

    • @loeasikgwasik6759
      @loeasikgwasik6759 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I have the same situation like you. My narc wife took my baby boy and disappeared. just so she can hurt me because she knows that I love my baby boy so much. My baby was 10 months old when she took it from me and now my baby is 2 years old. Sorry for the bad english

    • @kujokannibal7081
      @kujokannibal7081 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Going through the same. Will keep you in my prayers, please send one up for me too.

    • @randyjackson6719
      @randyjackson6719 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sounds just like my Ex-wife.

    • @jonathanomahony688
      @jonathanomahony688 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I am a wife of a narcissists husband for the last 35 years.
      My husband sees the teenagers Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday's each week.
      He has no interest in them, no empathy or love for them.
      This is only to get a supply from them , to give him validation.
      They use children just like they use us.
      It's all about them and them alone.
      There looking for a reaction from you and will do anything, or use anything to abuse you.
      Do not react in anyway as you are giving them a supply.
      Any reaction either NEGATIVE OR POSITIVE is a supply from them.

    • @dianewienbar1322
      @dianewienbar1322 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ❤ 🙏🙏🙏

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    I know EXACTLY why: to teach us about evil.

    • @MissCane9
      @MissCane9 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you!

    • @swtayh
      @swtayh 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Okay!!

    • @cindyski4413
      @cindyski4413 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      God taught me, that I needed a backbone. Self esteem, self respect and independence. I remember a moment when I said to myself, “damn, words do hurt!” They not only emotionally hurt but does bodily harm, without anyone putting a finger on me. I’m happy we don’t live together. We need lots of deliverance from all the trauma. Lots of riding of the demonic oppression. Lots of prayers and intervention of the Holy Spirit. Does work! You mind and body needs to hear that you are cutting all soul ties with this person and then step in faith into your new life.

    • @lologege5466
      @lologege5466 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@cindyski4413 May I suggest, you investigate these approaches
      so as to help narcissits, BEFORE entering a relationship:
      th-cam.com/video/qStUsKsJ_9k/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/WkxSyv5R1sg/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/phHib5VaCeE/w-d-xo.html
      CURE the Narcissits before yoking yourself to a Narcissist
      Take care

    • @dnotesdnotes8245
      @dnotesdnotes8245 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Riiiiight

  • @bonitajolie9341
    @bonitajolie9341 3 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    Shaneen, where have you been all my life??????? OMG girlfriend, I have intensely studied this subject matter. Never have I come across someone who so eloquently uses the word of God to put this disorder into perspective. So, thank you!! Your channel has been a breath of fresh air to me and very helpful. ❤️

    • @fatimadeguzman3204
      @fatimadeguzman3204 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I Totally Agree! 👍

    • @Sevvin89
      @Sevvin89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amen to that!

    • @tanyagreen429
      @tanyagreen429 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I was saying the same thing. Everybody let them feel they are powerful except this lady. Nobody great but God. He knows how to melt their hearts. Only a matter of time

  • @generallee5609
    @generallee5609 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Thank you. You bring clarity to my life. I was married to my NPD ex-wife for about 30 years. I have been divorced for about 4 years. I prayed for guidance and finally got it. God has helped me through this. “Haven’t I always provided for you?” He said. I live every day now with a thankful heart. God is great.

  • @kathylewis5025
    @kathylewis5025 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "When under trial, let no one say: 'I am being tried by God.' For with evil things God cannot be tried, nor does he himself try anyone." - James 1:13

  • @violetgypsie
    @violetgypsie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +267

    Just keep in mind that when they point out your “flaws” that they are doing it in a malicious, hurtful way. And that although they are in an adult body, they have the emotions of a small child. Like a little kid saying “I hate you mommy” when they don’t get their way. So don’t take anything they say as devastating. Yes we are all flawed and it can be a time for introspection and checking in with God, but they are deeply lacking in any kind of emotional maturity and will lash out like small children. They are incapable of introspection and lack empathy and most likely lack the guidance of the Lord.

    • @theresefournier3269
      @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      You've got it sista!

    • @annamariaricci2146
      @annamariaricci2146 3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      This is right wath you say that they bring you to deal with your flsws but they do it in an absolute brutal way!! They do it to destroy you and not to help you!! It is really the worst way to deal with your flaws!! 😎

    • @allhimwithme5115
      @allhimwithme5115 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Yes, the most destructive narcissists live in the church! Just because they SAY they have the Spirit doesn't mean they DO. That was the thing that misled me the most; if I met them in a "Christian" environment I let my guard down. Oops.

    • @theresefournier3269
      @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@annamariaricci2146 which is why, when they switched the word in Proverbs, from discipline to punishing, i immediately ran for my older one, and sure enough, it made no sense, to me, at all. Almost, the last straw! ha! Baruch YahuYah and His Mighty Word! Agapao

    • @kynathomas4809
      @kynathomas4809 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@allhimwithme5115 I knew 3 narcissists so far and the last one was a woman who proclaimed to be a Christian ( we even got baptized on the same day along with our daughters) in the year and a half I knew her she betrayed me and stabbed me in the back as if she set out to destroy me. I am still shocked that she could do the things she did to me and call herself a Christian.

  • @itsmoenishanotmoesha8469
    @itsmoenishanotmoesha8469 3 ปีที่แล้ว +135

    I'm currently going through a divorce with a narcissist. I was so saddened because I felt abused then thrown away. But now I look at it like this I gained wisdom about relationships and having boundaries. I learned the importance of sex being only meant for husband and wife. I also stopped a bad addiction to weed because I stopped during the relationship and was able to see the effects of it on my husband. I have a beautiful daughter and most importantly I recognize the voice of God when he tells me to leave certain people alone.

    • @Tony-dh
      @Tony-dh 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You cant fight a narcissist in court and win. Ask him what he thinks both of you would be happy with. Do that.
      Judicial system is run by narcs and demons.

    • @raqueljvaldez7407
      @raqueljvaldez7407 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you for sharing,I'm not alone.

    • @chaimomma9198
      @chaimomma9198 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      If sex is only for marriage then marriage is abusive. You get no way out if sex becomes abusive. It’s easier to separate from a boyfriend that abuses you. Living with an abusive husband makes you completely defenseless and family blame YOU for your abusive marriage. They blame YOU for not having the ability know your own future. No once cares and you end up feeling sick or you have to live in a shelter. No one will help you. I can’t live in a shelter. I need to take special vitamins to maintain my autoimmune symptoms and paralysis from Guillain Bar.

  • @bethreyes1662
    @bethreyes1662 3 ปีที่แล้ว +198

    I live in a remote area and cannot find a counselor who is Christian. Thank you so much for putting this in biblical terms!!!

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      You're so welcome! ❤️

    • @patriciaking7892
      @patriciaking7892 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Beth, I know right 👍. I live around hypocrites who pretend to be Christians. Not being judgemental but truthful.

    • @carlaandridge1503
      @carlaandridge1503 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes Biblical and you answered my weak questions Perfectly 🥰

    • @greener9115
      @greener9115 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      So you have wifi stay tuned 👀🤔

    • @practicalphilosophy9031
      @practicalphilosophy9031 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's great!

  • @sandyduke5887
    @sandyduke5887 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    I do relate to your point about being refined by a narcissist. My husband pointed out unpleasant character traits of mine. And even though he wasn’t soft or kind about it, it has really blessed me to see my blind spots and have the Father’s help to change those offensive parts of me.

  • @fruitypopwhickle6806
    @fruitypopwhickle6806 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    They do force you to look at yourself. To love yourself. Value yourself. Appreciate yourself. Want only the best for yourself.

  • @a.w.3689
    @a.w.3689 3 ปีที่แล้ว +201

    Thank you sister, this is exactly 💯 in my life! He said, it wasn't to hurt me, it was to build me, and I will understand later, then it will makes sense! The Lord has released me from this marriage and it will be finalized this December 2021! I watched God moved in a great way and watched miracles happened!!!! The Lord dosen't condone what they do. Vengeance is mine says the Lord, also for them being disobedient they too are going to go through it as well, for not changing, not being repentant, and not allowing God to do the work in them, thank you for these messages God bless you Sister!

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Thank you for sharing Angela. May the Lord guide you and be with you as your divorce is being finalized. ❤️. I pray many blessings in this next season of your life. 🕊💕

    • @carolchimelis4533
      @carolchimelis4533 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I love what you wrote this is truth. I needed to see this.

    • @miguelchippsinteligente6072
      @miguelchippsinteligente6072 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      The holy Bible says seek the kingdom of God first this laidy is wrong in scriptures perspective and in relationships learn what narcissistic even means shes wrong 🌬🤡🎭💎🌪🛶🤍🗽💎we're victims and survivors

    • @miguelchippsinteligente6072
      @miguelchippsinteligente6072 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@ShaneenMegji ur wrong completely ur narcissistic misguided and misguiding them they are victims of abuse and others are survivors or others killed 🤍🗽💎👨‍✈️💖👻💎👩‍✈️💖👻💎🛶🌬🤡🎭🌪

    • @TR-ru7tb
      @TR-ru7tb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes this is why david eventually prayed psalms 109

  • @jeaniedixon3160
    @jeaniedixon3160 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    You have pegged my relationship to a T. I was called back to this relationship that I left. I knew that God called me back to it. I am now stronger in God than I have ever been. The narcissist does not affect me as before. I see him for who he is and aware of his ways. God has truly blessed me. I am blessed that God has brought me to your videos! I will continue to watch!!

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Wow! Thank you for sharing your testimony Jeanie. It is not very often that people are called back to a narcissistic relationship and gain victory. So thank you for sharing! I bless you on your journey. And thank you for your kind words about my channel! 💕😊

    • @heyonope7682
      @heyonope7682 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I too feel called back recently. Now with Jesus in my corner. Holy Spirit guide me. Thankful for full armor of God. I have come to realize the devil had a target on his back at such a young age and God has a purpose for him as well. We both have trauma, childhood conditioning and personality disorders, time to defeat the demons together with Jesus and Gods foundation at our center.
      I desire kingdom marriage for Gods glory and salvation of others.

    • @jeaniedixon3160
      @jeaniedixon3160 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@heyonope7682 Amen! God has purpose for us all and if we follow his call all things work for the good. I believe this. It is difficult path but as you say, thankful for full armor of God. God gives us power over all our enemies. Things are much better here and studying Gods word together has proven very productive. I wish you the best. God Bless you both.

    • @heyonope7682
      @heyonope7682 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Thank you !!!! I'm going to lift you up in prayer, in agreement with your prayers and Gods perfect will. God does not want any of his children to perish. I had 4 years away from him to heal with Jesus. All soul ties broken withered at the root & yet im called back. Use me and equip us oh Lord 🙏

    • @nu5822
      @nu5822 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@heyonope7682 Just remember God is not the author of confusion, and has called us to live in peace. If the relationship causes strife and confusion, it may not be God that has called you back to it. God may have a purpose for your ex, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you are a part of it. I’m praying for your healing, and for you to exercise discernment in Jesus’ name. God bless 💓

  • @doonyfam8431
    @doonyfam8431 3 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    When I first got in a relationship with my narc ex I thought he was an answer to my prayers. When he cheated on me and my marriage broke up, and I realised he was a narc, I questioned God, why? I now know the beginning of our relationship was love bombing and why I thought he was an answer to my prayers. Its also good to know that God can turn the bad marriage I was in for good. Since being in a relationship with my ex I've learned so much about myself. And I think I had to go through that to know what I know now

    • @-3lory
      @-3lory 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      me too

    • @rse432
      @rse432 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @Doony Fam Hence, your testimony. In order for you to share your story you must live the story. One can not testify of anything unless they go through something.

    • @shannonbaker316
      @shannonbaker316 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is my story too

    • @lologege5466
      @lologege5466 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@shannonbaker316 May I suggest, you investigate these approaches
      so as to help narcissits, BEFORE entering a relationship:
      th-cam.com/video/qStUsKsJ_9k/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/WkxSyv5R1sg/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/phHib5VaCeE/w-d-xo.html
      CURE the Narcissits before yoking yourself to a Narcissist
      Take care

    • @dnotesdnotes8245
      @dnotesdnotes8245 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yesssssss me 2….. learned how to love me

  • @CJ-jq4lv
    @CJ-jq4lv 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Both my parents! And some cousins also! It doesn’t run in my family, it gallops! “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”
    Proverbs 4:23

    • @MsBdoll87
      @MsBdoll87 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol at it gallops in your family!

  • @JustPlainDeb
    @JustPlainDeb ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The narcissist can put you in the wilderness like no other person can

  • @midnightmoonflower2999
    @midnightmoonflower2999 3 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    Excellent video. I am stronger, more loving of myself, and more aware of evil people since my experience with a narc.

  • @dahliaschultz823
    @dahliaschultz823 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I completely agree. A narcissist passed through my life and really really affected me. After that really toxic relationship I finally restarted my relationship with God so I thank the lord for that experience. I also realized that Jesus was teaching me to not only love people around me but I must love myself first 💙

  • @dimakatsogofhamodimo4284
    @dimakatsogofhamodimo4284 3 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    Narcissist s want to change you into what they want you to be , not what you are by your own nature. You only lose your self confidence as you listen to their abusive comments and outranges. They can never be good because of the approach they use in talking to you, always condescending, patronizing and talking down on you. It is difficult to listen to someone who wants to change you to be like them whilst you also are a unique individual who needs to be respected as such. Who said their way of being is the best? You can only learn who they are and respect the way they do things but copying them or listening to their comments can only bring you down. Their toxicity can only help other narcissists like them may be.

    • @17annyrose
      @17annyrose 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      On point👍

    • @luadraponies
      @luadraponies 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Was so alive, a prayer warrior, asked to move with the evangelist when he and his wife were to move, like family.
      He drowned, a strong swimmer. Before his time. Church members encouraged the marriage, some didn’t. We had masses of teaching over years. A survivor of years of incest, god had rebuilt. At 12 had become a Christian and not allowed to go to church. Spirit led to repent and heal many things. Got to 19/20 and dating, church members. Knew needed to be careful because of that personal past and a relationship to support that healing. Self worth, love and be loved. The evangelist was also a teaching gift. All the gifts. Able to discern others but when someone like that comes along the demonic force behind them blinds you by love bombing. Just a non Christian acquaintance from a few hours away, so no one knew him. Praying for salvation for ages as he would visit and hang out. He had no friends where he lived, a stuffed shirt. Some asked about whether this or that….things that learnt belong to spirit of ahab. He didn’t talk much and not of spiritual things. Was Satan happy to see me grow out of what had been and work against the strong holds. As that young teen asked for wisdom. Was the friend at school to help and older than my years.
      When being with husband to be when the acquaintance started, always blocked talking about god by the verse to not cast pearls before swine. He only went to church after 8 months when said that would not marry non Christian. Christians said stupid things about set it free and if it comes back, marry a friend because sometimes love doesn’t last. He denied the prophetic words given to me about him, but they came true. He had already wounded after the engagement, I had to wear the guilt of all of what he had spent courting when he couldn’t afford it.
      Had a disturbed spirit getting closer to the wedding, that shouldn’t be making parts of the real old school vows, didn’t make oaths to god. Told by some just normal jitters. Not for who I was.
      Walked down that aisle with the spirit saying had thrown away my life, even though he had made all these promises. He had just made a vow of love and some months later when living thousands of miles from family and friends he says that he never loved me. We didn’t know his family as too far away .
      Lay down with dogs….
      So much was preached about being unequally yolked but not how to identify the traits of a wolf in sheeps clothing. Had a couple times of being woken by demonic presences after being married. Living in a spiritually hard place, but had before. These were dark.
      When he was bringing me down back then the spirit said that by marrying him was now exposed to attacks from the enemy and sickness. When he raped could see the darkest soul. Go forward, cold to children so that caused more deep hurt, was changed, the times urged to leave from within told not too. Had a massive desire for it to be made right, but also needed family and spiritual support to leave…not there.
      People with Asperger’s and lack of emotion cannot be normal. Listening to a talk by two mothers of their offspring. Knowing that all that had been sucked out of me and the children wasted. Christian counsellor said impossible, prayer will not work,
      Too late..had been crippled but he was still full of hate and was having the garden ripped apart and I went to speak to him and the blackest look came at me and the manifesting of Satan, reached out and felt my heart and soul physically ripped out of the body, soul knew was dead

    • @michaelasun7593
      @michaelasun7593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Exactly. You lose your identity trying to improve yourself according to their criticism. And their goals is not for you to be better but for you to lose your goals, waste your time, serve them and to erase your identity, and make you doubt yourself.

  • @Thenextperson
    @Thenextperson 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    It has trained me! It almost killed me a few times, which has made me wake up to what God really wants from me!!!❤

  • @bossmom522
    @bossmom522 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m glad I found this channel ! Thank you

  • @miaperezarroyo1939
    @miaperezarroyo1939 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Thank you immensely. I had a narc family, a narc husband, and a narc boss who collectively brought out the best in me. I never would’ve reached for the stars unless I had to-and I certainly did. Much to their dismay and disgust, I reached my star.

  • @alicelorek9515
    @alicelorek9515 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    Lol...I really needed to hear this...I try to go places with my husband and have a nice time, but it almost always backfires on me. It happened again yesterday. I had to drop my husband off at home then go run an errand. I was yelling at God for an explanation. Then your video shows up today. I know God listens and hears us. But it always amazes me when he answers.

  • @meag3019
    @meag3019 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    1 Fault finders
    2 Be able to be desensitized
    3 Train to abide on God's Peace
    4 Training to go beyond your limits
    Unrealistic demands
    Other environments wouldn't put so much on you
    5 Strengthening yourself with inner strength to deal with anything, and to find God.

  • @ekaterinabalderdash31
    @ekaterinabalderdash31 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I was in a ‘romantic’ relationship with a narcissist. God used my momentary lapse of reason to teach me about narcissism. Why? Because I have family members who are narcissists and I spent a lifetime so confused by their behavior. Once I learned what narcissistic personality order really means, I finally understood. Knowledge is power and while I can’t go no contact on them I can greatly minimize their impact on me simply by knowing what they are.

  • @tashiavanpelt
    @tashiavanpelt ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I’m married to a narcissist and it has absolutely wrecked me mentally,emotionally and physically. I have lost so much weight that my doctor made me see an oncologist! The only good thing it has brought me is 3 beautiful children and a relationship with God!! Raising kids with a narcissistic father is sooo hard I’m scared of the consequences it will have on my kids!😭 I’m stuck because I’m a stay at home mom. I pray God will save me and my precious children. I can honestly say that if my husband disappeared to hell I would not even care and that’s not something I ever would have thought. I’m 106 lbs now and absolutely drained. Please pray for my family

    • @sweetjessie240
      @sweetjessie240 ปีที่แล้ว

      I really think you should go get some help from your Pastor or a menthor of your church! Praying that God gives you wisdom for This hard trial sister ❤️🙏 God loves you and cares for your health and your children, stay safe 💕✝️

    • @marthamuselu8572
      @marthamuselu8572 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@@sweetjessie240many churches and pastors don't appreciate emotional abuse, the experience may just leave her feeling worse

    • @alisonmarie568
      @alisonmarie568 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      My pastors told me to keep praying for my husband and be submissive to him - telling me God would bless me for it. So I did for years, until I couldn't take it any longer. A Christian psychologist helped me to realise that The Lord did not expect me to tolerate abuse of any kind. When I finally separated from my husband, both my teenagers were angry that I took so long. When we divorced, my son told me that I should frame my divorce certificate and put it on the wall. He and my daughter said they would have been better off coming from a broken home than suffering what they did. That was almost 20 yrs ago and me and my adult kids are still trying to overcome the symptoms of narcissistic abuse.
      Please get legal advice and try to find support outside of the church.
      Btw I'm still a Christian and have learned the hard way that The Lord will never put us in an abusive relationship for any reason - He is not cruel.

    • @thisoldnest6963
      @thisoldnest6963 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I would encourage you to read Enough is Enough by Dr David Clarke. He also has a TH-cam page.
      SAHM of 4. I’ve been out for almost 3 months. It’s like taking a full breath for the first time in 15 years. God has provided in miraculous ways financially.
      I also highly encourage you to find a support system of people who understand abuse. I didn’t understand the importance of that until after getting out. It is priceless.

    • @thisoldnest6963
      @thisoldnest6963 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Also, not all pastors/churches are the same. Find out your churches policy on divorce. Many have stances against abuse. Find one that does and you will likely find others that understand what you are going through.

  • @GiselleUffens
    @GiselleUffens ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I experienced all 5 of these benefits. I’ve been married to a narcissist for 4-years and god used it to actually heal me long time wounds and trauma. That’s sounds so incredibly bizarre because it’s abuse, but it forced me into a relationship with Christ so deep that he truly used these “lemons” to heal me. Amazing our god is that great that he can use abuse to heal. Amazing. ❤

  • @billrundell2097
    @billrundell2097 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    It is the purpose of the Holy Ghost to bring conviction
    into the life a believer. Not the Narcissist.

    • @patriciaclark1492
      @patriciaclark1492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amen. Narcissist do not come from a place a truth EVER. THEY lack mercy.
      God is All about TRUTH LAWS and JESUS IS all about mercy forgiveness , I concluded these are the Pharisees who needed to be told by jesus that he was hanging out with john Baptist because these folks need a doctor, knowing the brood the vipers were HYPOCRITES murderers ROBBERS destoyers anyhow on purpose arrogantly so. Cain and Judus types. Wolves covered SHEEPS CLOTHING AND THAT SHEEPS CLOTHING IS YOU AND EVERY ONE THAT ASSOCIATES WITH THEM . NARCS CARE ABOUT FAKE APPEARANCES FIRST , TO CONTINUE TO TRICK AND USE PEOPLE .
      JESUS SAID SEPARATE FROM THEM . WHEN YOU GET LOOSE FROM.A SNARE RUN.
      THIS WOMAN IS ENABLING PPL TO BE ENABLERS TO THESE NARCS. ANYONE ASSOCIATING W A NARC IS ENABLING THEM BECAUSE THEY ARE USING EVERYONE LIKE A TOOL.
      THEY ARE GOD AND EVERYONE IS BENEATH THEM TO SERVE THEIR GLUTTONY, FALSE EGO, AND SELFISH DESIRES. THEY DO GOID TO BE SERN AS GOOD. THEY ARE VERY DESTRUCTIVE PPL WHO WASTE TIME AND ENERGY AND ACTUALLY BRAINWASH VICTIMS MENTAL EMOTIONAL ABUSE.
      FIGHT FLIGHT FREEZE APPEASE ALL DAY LONG. THIS WOMAN TELLS YOU WHAT YOU MAY WANNA HEAR, THAT THERE WAS SOME DANG PURPOSE OR BENEFIT FOR US. LIAR, THERE IS NOT !!!!

    • @patriciaclark1492
      @patriciaclark1492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Thank you bill for your sane biblical.answer. this woman is pulling assumptions outta the air.

    • @fancimcguffin2227
      @fancimcguffin2227 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@patriciaclark1492 Tell me. Without yelling. Do you believe the Lord never allows bad things to touch your life? Do you believe the Lord always wants you to run from every hard situation? Do you think it’s always possible to run? Paul sent a slave back to his master. Was Paul evil? What if the narcissist in a persons life is a boss? A parent of a minor child? Do you understand there are times it’s not possible to run? What then? She isn’t advocating accepting abuse from what I hear. She is admitting there are times it’s not possible to run. We don’t always get to run away. I was the step daughter of a narcissist in a time when no one knew what that was. I became a believer at age 8 and was under his rule from age 10 to 18. How was I supposed to
      run? Was God still good? Yes. Did God remove him? No.
      Think.

    • @fancimcguffin2227
      @fancimcguffin2227 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes. Tell me. Does the Bible make clear that the Lord uses human beings as He wills?
      Is God Sovereign? Does He always remove us from the path of the hurricane? Are there times we go through instead of around? Are there times it’s impossible to run? Think.

    • @colbywidener7092
      @colbywidener7092 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@fancimcguffin2227 the question to be asked to you is why are you getting even remotely defensive and appear to be supporting the role of the narrascit? You do realize they are being Sataniclly controlled whether they are people in the church or outside. The Antichrist will be the biggest nassricist the world has even seen, If you were there during that time why would you listen to this "feedback" of you as truth? It's all a lie. One that would severely cost you if you listen. You would be a fool to think that the narrascit can teach you any lesson. The only thing to be learned from them is how to avoid such people. Paul tells use to avoid contention. AVOID such people, don't allow the influence of the world to manipulate or criticize you. I understand she is only human and can make a mistake, BUT there is a fine line between making a mistake and something being flat out heretical and false. Imagine all the victims of these people who hear her say it's God's will that you be in a relationship with a nassricist. Those people may very well get drawn back into the cycle of hell all over again.
      The Bible makes it clear they are there to destroy you. Not help you
      Titus 1:16 - They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate.
      Romans 16:17-19 - Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.
      Matthew 7:16 - Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles?
      Proverbs 16:18 - Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.
      Why in the world would you listen to those God says are being destroyed by the moment? There are plenty of other verses in Bible that tells the beleiver to avoid the evil behavior of others. Do not take part in the worthless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. That is God talking to the beleiver about evil men not God talking to evil men on how to address the beleiver

  • @nicolerenee7025
    @nicolerenee7025 2 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    This is so insightful, and so true! I find your contact very refreshing. I was married to a narcissist for 7 1/2 years. I watch these other videos about what a light we are and how wonderful we are and they are terrible. I know for a fact that I definitely had my faults, and yes, the narcissist pointed out all of them. And then some. But God used it all. He doesn’t waste a hurt.

  • @wilmadavis9767
    @wilmadavis9767 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Our own free will gets us into these relationships. God will use any circumstance for His glory if we'll let Him, but that doesn't mean He orchestrated it.

  • @Lea-bk3lx
    @Lea-bk3lx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    O dear🥹 this is the first reassuring video that i’ve watched about narcissism; that doesn’t tell how i have ruined my life by being with one… i believe in blessings in disguise! Thank you so much🙏🏼✨

  • @pmh2242
    @pmh2242 3 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    Everything you said has happened in my life. I have grown so much in the Lord. I’ve been married to a narc for 44 years. It’s amazing the peace that God gives me through the abuse.

    • @kblankenship5870
      @kblankenship5870 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Do you just ignore ? I cannot stand the hate and cannot sleep, I am in another room now.

    • @SSFDeliverance
      @SSFDeliverance 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I get that you have peace...but will you continue to stay in the relationship with abuse because you have peace?

    • @inutz38
      @inutz38 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Im also having a second thought if im gonna still go on with this abusive relationship. My husband never ever admitted any mistake even though its crystal clear that hes cheating. He refused to apologize thinking that he never done anything wrong. He is abusive and manipulative there were times im thinking if its worth continuing

    • @Seraphim7
      @Seraphim7 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I Hope you're well and Continuing to Living the Abundant Life Christ died for you. You are Worthy and Deserve it.🙏💟God doesn't want us to Stay in Abuse.....💔 The Spouse that comes from God would Not Abuse..

    • @Muchjoyhere1981
      @Muchjoyhere1981 ปีที่แล้ว

      I would so love to correspond with you! I am in the narc relationship for 20 years. Because of boundaries in place I am able to keep living with him, even though it is hard. But this video is so true and I would have been a mediocre Christian if there is something like that, without the adversity to draw me to Christ time and again. But I long for someone to talk to who is in this turmoil who has found peace in God.

  • @susanjaneterry1073
    @susanjaneterry1073 2 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    You bring a fresh perspective. My walk with God has grown exponentially. And He has shown me thru the narc where I need to grow. In my life, whenever something really bad happened to me it was always followed by something 100x better. I trust this is God's favor. He fought my every battle and I think He held my hand and led me out of my valley of despair in the last few months. Now I want to take His hand and hold on tight as I learn to walk in the light. Thank you.

    • @sandybarnes334
      @sandybarnes334 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      AMEN A fresh perspective can only come through the Wisdom of the Holy Spirit which dwells within Her/Us.....by Which I believe Shaneen is teaching us when she References the Scripture with such Understanding. As Jesus taught us to do.

  • @marilynmoore8353
    @marilynmoore8353 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    THANKYOU !!!! It has been very confusing for me the past 29 yrs ! I feel much better now understanding my reason . I knew God knew my heart . Tough being married to a bibical , grandious narc . Good qualities but absolutely no boundaries and canntwist the bible to accommodate his needs . I've been seperating myself from him because i've lived under his umbrella for so long i have to have MY life back with God and what God has in store for me 🙂🙌

    • @shelleyvanderhoek2243
      @shelleyvanderhoek2243 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your spouse sounds similar to mine biblical Christian narc man. This has the makes for a lot of guilt when attempts from me to complete separation from him

    • @tinaureta9891
      @tinaureta9891 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I chose to stay…. Even after 25 years!
      It was my Sin that got me into this marriage with No boundaries or caution, jumped in.
      I’ve been slowing disintegrating, as he has torn me down inch by inch.
      However! The last 6 years I’ve been taking my stand and telling him, I will Not tolerate your Verbal Name calling, and I walk AWAY.
      He now is in the throes of a Full Blown tantrum malicious style . And he will go and preach this week. Hmmm…. yes I guess if I choose to stay..
      I Must Empower myself by the Grace and Strength of The Lord.
      I stay BUSY BUSY BUSY.
      “Gotta Go!”
      “No time to talk, sorry!”
      “I’m so tired, gotta go lay down”
      Until Christ comes in the sky, or he takes off and leaves me…. Gods Love & Grace stays and leads me❤️
      I pray FOR YOU

  • @Lbcf710
    @Lbcf710 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This has really helped me understand why I’m with a narcissist and still have the peace of God to deal with them.

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I’m so glad. Praise God. 🙏🏽

  • @passionateforjesus4019
    @passionateforjesus4019 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Being with a narcissist almost took my life.
    I thank God I escaped alive not without chronic diseases that I’m still on medication after almost two years of no contact.

  • @nancybrazeau5698
    @nancybrazeau5698 3 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    Totally needed this...your message really encouraged me...so many times dealing with the abusive person, I forgot to look after myself that the Lord loves me and wants His very best for me...and dealing with my heart and lessons Im learning through this..the word of God is so powerful...look forward to this passing and what God has for me...🌹💕thankyou once again..I love the biblical perspective on this subject..

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Thank you Nancy! 😊. I’m so glad this video was helpful. I pray many blessings and special encounters with the Lord. 🙏🏽💕

    • @marilynmoore8353
      @marilynmoore8353 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I've done the same thing ! We got this girlie !

    • @carolchimelis4533
      @carolchimelis4533 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Me too… well said.

    • @lologege5466
      @lologege5466 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@carolchimelis4533 May I suggest, you investigate these approaches
      so as to help narcissits, BEFORE entering a relationship:
      th-cam.com/video/qStUsKsJ_9k/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/WkxSyv5R1sg/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/phHib5VaCeE/w-d-xo.html
      CURE the Narcissits before yoking yourself to a Narcissist
      Take care

  • @carollampman9897
    @carollampman9897 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    Thank you! I needed someone to point out the "God" relationship that helps to live with a narcissist. No one else has done that before but it really helps!

    • @tcsa9961
      @tcsa9961 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amen sister🙏🏼God has us in his hands

  • @nd612
    @nd612 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    Shaneen Megji:
    Thank you for stating the fact that it's not that easy to just leave when you are in a situation.

    • @braveheart977
      @braveheart977 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That's what I can't understand. Why am I trapped in this hell of a relationship with no way out. No family, no financial freedom. Physical limitations. I definitely feel like a failure because I made such a bad mistake by marrying this man and devoting my life to him. He has betrayed me in every way. I am trying to hang on to Hope...but things always fall through. My precious dog is my great source of love and I am so grateful for him.

    • @kathleenmorris9309
      @kathleenmorris9309 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I have the same problem.
      No finance so it's difficult to leave

    • @lologege5466
      @lologege5466 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kathleenmorris9309 May I suggest, you investigate these approaches
      so as to help narcissits, BEFORE entering a relationship:
      th-cam.com/video/qStUsKsJ_9k/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/WkxSyv5R1sg/w-d-xo.html
      th-cam.com/video/phHib5VaCeE/w-d-xo.html
      CURE the Narcissits before yoking yourself to a Narcissist
      Take care

    • @margaretboehm4485
      @margaretboehm4485 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Exactly. When finances etc are shared, it's very difficult, and so hard to see a way out, even with constant prayer 😓

    • @jacquidanke1263
      @jacquidanke1263 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@braveheart977 SOUNDS LIKE MY SITUATION. I AM NOT MARRIED TO THIS MAN BUT AM PHYSICALLY DISABLED, SUFFER FROM ANXIETY/DEPRESSION/SEXUAL TRAUMA (REPEATED OVER AND OVER THROUGHOUT MY LIFE) AND AM TRYING TO BE A GOOD CHILD OF GOD. HE TAKES THE DOG AWAY FROM ME AND LEAVES ME ALONE AT THE HOUSE AS MUCH AS HE CAN HE HAS CHEATED SINCE DAY ONE. I WS BLIND TO THIS BUT I ASKED GOD TO OPEN MY EYES, FOR DISCERNMENT, AND FOR TRANSPARANCY TO SEE WHO IS SAFE AND WHO IS NOT. HIS FAMILY (AND MINE EXCEPT FOR MY DAD) HAS ALCOHOL/DRUG/PROSTITUTION PROBLEMS AND DOES NOT WANT TO CHANGE. IT IS EMBARASSING TO BE WITH HIM OUT IN PUBLIC AS HE HAS PERVERTED WAYS AND IT IS SICKENING TO ME. I WILL NOT ALLOW HIM TO SEE OR TOUCH ME. I AM GOD'S CHILD AND WILL PURSUE HIM UNTIL HE COMES TO TAKE ME HOME! GOD BLESS ALL OUT THERE FIGHTING THE GOOD FIGHT!

  • @wvanes2309
    @wvanes2309 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you so much, this is very encouraging!

  • @AshleyJax
    @AshleyJax ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Amen
    God is showing me what unconditional love is and what forgiveness means and it’s literally stretching me and I’m so thankful for my trials now and no longer feel sorry for myself

  • @HealthyLifestyled788
    @HealthyLifestyled788 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Very true. My narcissist ex helped me to be more humble helpful to humanity closer to God caring for others. I developed so much mental strength.

    • @MJ-qb5ph
      @MJ-qb5ph 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Really? That is amazing. My narcisstic family almost drove me to suicide and two years of no contact I still feel a bit vulnerable. Their campaign against me was horrific. You did well. Bless

    • @HealthyLifestyled788
      @HealthyLifestyled788 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @N G I am sorry .Please takes the times to listen to some great motivational speeches listen to God words and spend times with him.Don't allow the narcissist to win you're beautiful and smart because you're a child of God Don't ever allow a miserable human being to force you to think about suicide.

  • @lonewolf3828
    @lonewolf3828 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    My own mother!!! I was traumatized badly my peoples!! CPTSD. But thank you Lord. To You be the glory and all praises!!! Thank you Jesus!

  • @hestercastlemansa2976
    @hestercastlemansa2976 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I have become much more independent. I go away from home often to escape the abuse. Always alone, on my own. So I had to put boundaries in place, do what I intend doing without being sweet talked out of it, be firm, save money for my escapes and mostly use this alone time to pray and meditate. I am not so emotionally invested anymore and I've learned that one creates one's own happiness, regardless of the people around you.

    • @t-bird7496
      @t-bird7496 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hi Hester! Ek hoop die SA in jou naam staan vir Suid-Afrika? En Hester is 'n super Afrikaanse naam?? 😀
      Wil net sê, ek kan so relate. Ek vlug elke oggend uit my huis uit en gaan werk by familie se huise of koffie shops. Ek's ook nie meer emosioneel invested in man nie, sukkel nou ook om aan hom te raak of soen. Ek is basically alleen in hierdie 'verhouding', verwaarlosing en indifference is aan die orde van die dag. Soveel so dat dit nou my normaal is. My arme kinders is nie stupid nie. Ek sidder om te dink dat hul ook so 'n verhouding moet oorkom.. of dat my seuntjie soos sy Pa gaan operate as hy groot is. Ek is wel nou op die pad van selfpreservation - ek oefen, fokus op die Here en Sy liefde vir my, en ek maak werk daarvan om daar te wees vir my kinders. Die pyn van hierdie verhouding is soms oorweldigend! Ek wou net sê jou boodskap het by my geresoneer, jy's nie alleen nie. Baie liefde en sterkte vir jou. x

    • @hestercastlemansa2976
      @hestercastlemansa2976 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@t-bird7496 Jip! Trots Suid-Afrikaans en suiwer Afrikaans. Ek is 10 jaar gelede geskei en het so 5 jaar later die man ontmoet met wie ek nou in 'n verhouding is. Ons het 2 jaar gedate en alles was goed. Die oomblik toe ek al my bekende goed agterlaat en saam met hom intrek toe begin die narsissisme uitkom. Hy het sy eiendom in Witbank verkoop (want ek het gesê oor my dooie liggaam bly ek daar!). Ek het in 'n cottage op my suster se kleinhoewe gebly. Alles het perfek gelyk. Hy was nie 'n blink Stefaans soos my eks nie, meer grof soos my pa. Wat kan nou verkeerd gaan? Saam is ons Thabazimbi toe en kort daarna agter 'n beter geleentheid aan Lichtenburh toe.

    • @hestercastlemansa2976
      @hestercastlemansa2976 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lichtenburg. Ons boer vir 'n maatskappy. En hier in Lichtenburg het hy nou eers 'n varkerige grotman geraak. Ek dink hy was te bang om die stap alleen te neem en toe gebruik hy my om sy droom te verwesenlik. Nou is ek die huishulp, vloermat, seksslaaf, sekretaresse, kok ens en ek werk ook nog op die plaas ook saam met hom! Skielik gaan ons nêrens mee heen nie, hy kerm oor en kritiseer alles en daar is geen emosionele intimiteit tussen ons nie. Wel, ek raak elke dag slimmer en sterker! Ek is al 'n meester in die grey rock tegniek! En grense stel. Ek moet sê dit gaan nou al baie beter met my. Sterkte. Dis goor, so alleen verhouding waar iemand net nooit daar vir jou is nie.

    • @hestercastlemansa2976
      @hestercastlemansa2976 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Dankie en sterkte. Die seks is aaklig en ek vermy dit ten alle koste!

  • @Coco-og7zw
    @Coco-og7zw ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I'm married to a narcissist, and this message has blessed me beyond measure. Thank you so much for taking the time to post it!!!

  • @Isaiah_61_7
    @Isaiah_61_7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    He has used this situation to teach me to forgive quickly.

  • @sharont9720
    @sharont9720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    I’m so glad you did this video. I’m 72 and my 51 year old son lives with me. My husband died 3 months ago. My son lives with me because he is disabled with heart failure. He is verbally very abusive to me and often humiliates me in public . There’s a lot of gaslighting going on and sometimes I think I can’t take it anymore and I don’t want to live this way. I own my house so I can’t just move out. He has no place to go and no income. But I know God is working in this situation.

    • @sharont9720
      @sharont9720 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Welcome's House no, I have a sweet daughter. She’s a real blessing.

    • @peachbun
      @peachbun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      If your son is disabled, he may qualify for in home care visits, as well as public assistance for scheduling rides to the store or doctor so that you don't have to help with that, or at least not as much. I pray that might be available to you to create more boundaries for yourself.
      Also, I do not know if you are collecting on your husband's work record for social security, but your son may qualify for an additional amount that they do not inform you about unless you look into it yourself. If he was disabled before either 22 or 21 ( not sure ) and you have records, then he should qualify for a higher amount based on his father's work record as an adult disabled child, that may help him live somewhere on his own. There are also group homes that may assist for low rent.
      I pray that since he is abusive, he may find housing elsewhere with public assistance for the disabled and that your daughter may help figure that out.
      I wouldn't bring it up as a consequence though, unless you are sure it is available first. Because unless he is mentally disabled, then that behavior...while it can be forgiven, it needs to change.
      You are providing for him, it is a blessing. He could at least be quiet rather than abusive 🙁. Praying for your situation.

    • @bettyparker3476
      @bettyparker3476 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@peachbun u are not talking like a Christian but the world. Yes her son should not talk to his mother that way but we do not know his reasons & what his issues are with his mom & dad & his upbringing prior.
      Don't give advice that could tear up a family & make life worse for the poor & needy. Are we perfect ?

    • @peachbun
      @peachbun 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@bettyparker3476 I don't know how you determine that I'm not talking like a Christian. If she needs help, she needs help. You should not encourage someone to suffer abuse as if that is God's will. Yes sometimes we do endure certain things, but we can also have other options to help the situation too.
      Of course I do not know their whole family history, and I do not need to know. Obviously this woman is elderly and alone dealing with this situation. She herself points out that he has no income, and so he can't go somewhere else. So if there were a way for him to have income, he could even move to an apartment down the street, you don't know. That is not tearing up a family, but maybe helping to bring healing and relief.

    • @kylielogan8771
      @kylielogan8771 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Nobody deserves abuse kick him out! This is elder abuse get social services to remove him Jesus doesn’t expect anyone to suffer at the hands of an abuser or be a doormat. Maybe then he’ll wake up and change I’m disabled with a rare painful neurological disease never would I ever abuse anyone especially someone helping me. ❤

  • @michelleblakeney9079
    @michelleblakeney9079 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I've always been taught to believe that for every person that crosses our path is either to help teach us a lesson or to hurt us in some way but it's up to us to figure out what it is!

  • @tcoleman497
    @tcoleman497 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I had peeks of this insight while I was in the relationship. This is total confirmation. Thank you for this FRESH perspective! Praise God!

  • @glilygoss
    @glilygoss 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    if you can, but God didn't put us on this earth for our own personal happiness. He died on the cross who knew no sin. Who am I to not expect to suffer? If God puts one in your life that makes it hard for you to run, than what this video is saying makes sense. It gives me a new perspective on narcissists. In my case it is family and neighbors

  • @sirg-had8821
    @sirg-had8821 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    God sent her to me to build my character and show me that I'm worth more than I have allowed myself to have.
    (I've spent my entire life shooting myself in the foot and settling for the bare minimum.)
    I learned how to set boundaries, and have enough self respect to walk away if I'm being mistreated.

  • @lynettecaballero1660
    @lynettecaballero1660 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    Love the spiritual aspect on this.
    Please do a video on the religious narcisstic.I thought I had a good guy who went to church several times a week prayed daily,read spiritual things...he just did not walk his talk... The lack of Being responsible, accountable,have integrity to keep his word and lack of self control over his anger,fears,insecurities was unbelievable and he projected onto me, he needed to control me cuz he couldn't control himself.. I learned not to take personally or react back with the same negativity or verbal abuse he used which strengthened me. I told him ..you will not drag me into your demonic pit with you. I led by a godly example...
    That put it back on him and he hated that! It's like dealing with a child throwing a tantrum. And a bully!
    Weak in spirit,not the godly man they claim to be and too fearful to face their imperfections to get the real help they need.

    • @carolchimelis4533
      @carolchimelis4533 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Wow this is truth. You nailed it.

    • @sherryfox1481
      @sherryfox1481 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same here, seen himself as my saviour, "to save me"; "like the woman at the well". Tried to get me to admit that his sin was my own... after 8yrs marriage, finally told him I wasn't drinking his kool-aid any longer, 5 months no contact (although he still trying to hoover, he's 67yrs old, 10 yr age difference, but he knows no one else will put up with his pharisees attitude & heart) I feel as though he just used me, mostly for sex, as he's an admitted sex addict and the narc supply. Any emotion exhibited was only during the/any love-bombing...
      I've rededicated my heart to Jesus and my healing journey.
      Thank you for these videos! Very enlightening to assist with the spiritual warfare 🙏❤🙏

    • @adaorah1900
      @adaorah1900 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I going through the exact experience. I married him because he claims to be a Christian. He lies against me and convinces everyone in church that I am the problem. Only a few people who are close to me believe me. He turned his family against me. I wail to God everyday for help. I have three children and that kind of ties me down. Please join me to pray to God 🙏 for deliverance. The relationship is so empty, no communication at all for the 7years+

  • @jackier7835
    @jackier7835 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Wow, that is exactly what I told my ex narcissist. I was there for a season for him but knew it would never be long term. My peace and joy immediately came back when I went no contact. I am so thankful to God for His deliverance.

  • @楊宜強
    @楊宜強 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I learned to remain peaceful as the person mocked me for my physical injury he caused. The shock of his boasting revealed how deceived he was and still is to me. Though it hurt me deeply I let it go. The next day he had an accident that injured him the same. He cried for help, then went to the doctor my friend had recommended to me after several other doctors had misdiagnosed me. He never allowed me to go to that doctor. But I know now that God Father is displeased when his daughter is scorned. Thank you for your very thoughtful video.I will be sure to watch more now that I found you ❤

    • @hildehausikujohannes7664
      @hildehausikujohannes7664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      staying, continuing to leave with a nascist is like sacrificing your life to Satan, you are joining the corrus to help kill you.leave alone the nascist so that the nascist can have an opportunity to change 1 kolinte 5 : 13 don't be confused, nascist is a penalty disorder, he or she is the one that needs to change not you.do not suffer for other people, s Budden. kno your boundaries.

    • @楊宜強
      @楊宜強 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Welcome's House Father Yah has strengthened me my whole life so that I truly know the pain of others. My testimony is when I comfort others by telling them exactly what they have experienced. They are surprised and tell me they'd never imagine I went through the same. When the joy of sharing how Jesus is our hope penetrates their minds, I'm blessed too. Thank you for your gift to pray for my healing, Welcome's House.

    • @楊宜強
      @楊宜強 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@hildehausikujohannes7664 I really appreciate your advice. Thank you for caring. We have been separated for years so he involves others I warned about him with his problems. I'm free to pray for all of them and trust Father Yah.

  • @lg9338
    @lg9338 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is confirmation I’ve been married to a narcissist over 35yrs and I have have changed personally so much and his rejection has grown me and helping me to fulfill the Lord’s purpose ❤❤. Thank you for this.

  • @joanmango8133
    @joanmango8133 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am very happy to find your channel. iam so tired of this narc. iam tired of his demons in the home because of him.iam tired of demons.

  • @joyvzpain1582
    @joyvzpain1582 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Yes, to say it was GOOD that I was afflicted! I have never been so close to him. I am aware of my idolatry now. I am also aware of the mercy and love Yaweh has. 🙏🏽💓

  • @cherylwestbrook5526
    @cherylwestbrook5526 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Thank you for this video! I was scrolling through TH-cam and found this gem. This resonates very much with me and what I am currently going through. I truly believe that God allows trials and tribulations, based on scripture, and to find myself in closer relationship with God is the ultimate goal.

  • @lorityndall5783
    @lorityndall5783 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Thank you so much for your message. I just got out of a 5 yr relationship with a narcissist husband. You nailed it, he did exactly what you talk about.

  • @willowspiral7886
    @willowspiral7886 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    This video just answered the very question I have been asking God during prayer recently. Thank you. 🙏🙏🙏

  • @jimboswell4818
    @jimboswell4818 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Looking at the world through lenses I've never seen before is actually a super freeing thing. Seeing other narcissists has enabled me to see myself more clearly and repent. Feel like I can actually breath now.

  • @Heavenandearth33
    @Heavenandearth33 3 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    It definitely has brought me closer to God. Thank you for this video 🙏🏼

    • @ShaneenMegji
      @ShaneenMegji  3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm so glad! Bless you Deborah. 🙏🏽💕

  • @apsypriya7602
    @apsypriya7602 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Once again, the Holy Spirit spoke to me through you. I've been so confused and troubled, because many experts (including Christians),have recommended leaving the narcissist. But, it's easier said than done. Have prayed and prayed because God is the author of peace and not confusion. He gave me an answer through you. Thanks so much.

    • @hildehausikujohannes7664
      @hildehausikujohannes7664 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      if God himself left Satan on his own because he is so bad, then who are you to continue putting up with a nascist. may be you want to commit suicide.

    • @theJ2theQ
      @theJ2theQ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I understand everybody’s story is different (similar probably), but still different. But one thing I learned is that usually a narcissist can only change once they are brought to rock bottom because they have zero insight. ‘Loving’ them more only gives them further grounds to abuse you. But we all have to make decisions for ourself, even if that means choosing to stay in your abusive marriage until the day you die, and being insanely heartbroken with a broken spirit at the end. But what is the fruit in that? My grandpa was the worst narcissist, and my grama who is 92 is still devastated by him (even though he died years ago), and even though she has dementia now she still continually talks about the heartbreak and pain he brought her. She was sooo loving and kind. But he never changed.

    • @tatucorreia
      @tatucorreia 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@hildehausikujohannes7664 only God can answer that question. That's between her and God 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @awakedeborahandsing
      @awakedeborahandsing 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@hildehausikujohannes7664 that’s a rotten thing to say.

    • @robynalbury-sipeli8479
      @robynalbury-sipeli8479 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I think you have to be careful before you make a decision to stay as a narcissistic will never change unless they are truely broken by God and by you staying you are enabling them to carry on with no consequences for their sin and therefore no motivation to truely repent. I have left my narcissistic after years of unrepentant lies and betrayal and put him in the hands of God. Only when he is alone can he ever think of
      turning to God. While you prop up his ego with your sacrificial love he will believe he has no need of the sacrifice of Jesus

  • @theresefournier3269
    @theresefournier3269 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    He makes sure that the student that is ready meets with a teacher, even from within, it will be provided! "Turn, turn"!

  • @_ShalomTV
    @_ShalomTV 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I soooooo appreciate how you’re doing this from a Christian point of view. I love it! Thank you for your obedience!

  • @michaeldavidson5979
    @michaeldavidson5979 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Shaneen, you just turned a negative into a positive. Being with a narcissist is definitely a storm but i also know God gives you peace at the end of the storm.

  • @triciasimon283
    @triciasimon283 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I was raised by a narcissist and got continuous feedback…. Negative… all the time. How is that supposed to help a child grow?

  • @imlady50
    @imlady50 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Thank You so much for your help! My son is a narcissist! I started my Spiritual Awekening Journey back on 2019, and my Faith, Strength, and Determination have grown stronger! I pray every day for him. He has been getting better little by little, but I leave everything in my Father Godly Mighty hands! He has the Power to change and to move Mountains! 🙏
    I'm very positive and spiritual! I know I have more to work on myself! And I'm willing! I'm doing excellent so far! I'm here to do his work! This journey is just the beginning of my new life and enlightenemt with the Divine!🙏

  • @allhimwithme5115
    @allhimwithme5115 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    He's teaching me to _let go._

  • @rickywheeler6054
    @rickywheeler6054 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you God for utilizing the narcissist to put me through the emotional grinder.

  • @brendadouglas5269
    @brendadouglas5269 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I have learned how to pick my battles .... narcs loves to battle over nothing ...... i have always known I'm not perfect .....

  • @KweenKiara
    @KweenKiara 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    After recently finding out the name (Covert narcissist) of my "spiritual warfare", I've been pressing into God's view of what I believed would be my forever.
    I have been deceived and even deceived myself when God reveled the truth to me. I didn't believe it for more than a year, but I get it now and love myself way more. My relationship with God is the best it's ever been and I look forward to the rest of what he is going to teach me. Hopefully next year I'll be single without a fight.

  • @lisabyl3240
    @lisabyl3240 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Excellent subject amd 5 explanations especially the Biblical one of David. The Joy of the Lord is my strength and He does keep us in perfect peace. He strengthens that peace in us the more we trust in Him

  • @monicaaustin6186
    @monicaaustin6186 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I so needed to be reminded!! I'm a super,sensitive empath... going on 12 years of trying to see light in a totally damaged dark heart... I search for the good in people and try to help pull them out of darkness by helping them find their shine... I feel people and energy so deeply that I can sense a person's mood when they enter a room without speaking a word... it is exhausting taking in so much, but it also has helped me to help those I feel need some kindness,compassion, or someone just to give a hug and some love... I love the golden rule... too much of the world,sadly forgot or never were taught....we all have value and deserve to be treated with kindness and dignity... GOD is LOVE... and in these 12 years with a narcissist, I've almost lost me several times... this feels like the year I make a full comeback!!... GOD Bless you all 💜💚🙏

  • @fjmf
    @fjmf ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Omg this is such an enlightening view and so true thank you for helping me shift my perspective

  • @aprilmichael5410
    @aprilmichael5410 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    After finding my peace in God, I told my narcissist ex husband " thank you for making me realise that the devil actually walks planet earth"
    I'll never forget the look on his face... priceless 😂😂 . How I love my God.
    Thank you Shanneen ❤

  • @angelabeninger2298
    @angelabeninger2298 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Just discovered this term for my daughter. So entitled yet running from responsibility and so manipulative with me. She uses flattery and then fault finding to a very hurtful degree. I'm her mom so I feel I have to protect her and can't abandon her no matter how abusive she is as I just see it as her trying to deal with trauma.

    • @tammywazup9830
      @tammywazup9830 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Exactly what we are going through. I will pray for you and your daughter.

    • @chaimomma9198
      @chaimomma9198 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It’s immaturity and trauma

  • @debbiebeattie3200
    @debbiebeattie3200 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Thank you! My Mother was a Narcissist, and as a Christian, I knew I was to Honor her. This made the relationship hard when I could see her for who she was. I say (was as she passed 1 yr ago).
    You have helped me process the WHY. I can now see clearly that my relationship with her for 65 yrs, did have a purpose.
    Keep up the messages.

  • @worthyoflovekristinajaylif4312
    @worthyoflovekristinajaylif4312 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Great content Shaneen🙏Thank you for talking about toxic relationships from Biblic perspective. I am so thankful I could learn a lot about narcissists, toxic and healthy relationships from different speakers on TH-cam, different books I’ve read, and have realized I have been in emotionally abusive relationship for over 20 years, just because wanted to be a kind, forgiving and more loving christian woman. I am opening a new chapter in my life, healing and allowing God to use my pain for His purpose. I have started my ministry helping other emotionally abused women to break free from toxicity, heal and create a beautiful future for themselves as beautiful daughters of God💕

  • @darwinleacock3868
    @darwinleacock3868 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Good video my dear sister! God's permissive Will is not His perfect Will, so He can use such a circumstance based on one's lifestyle and weaknesses that they have cultivated, that He(God) may use that toxic entanglement to "humble" and teach them "patience" that they may see more of their "un-Christlike" traits of character. What narc psychologist never seem to mention is that some narcs deal with witchcraft. So we have much to be thankful for that we received "deliverance" from such a relationship! Keep up the good work my dear!