I’m 62. My dream style is some strange combination of witchy/ forest dwelling/ fairy / rock chick lol. I feel it relates to past life memories perhaps?… Love this video. Thank you. ❤😊
Every single TH-camr I watch says get rid of the fantasy items! Miriam, this is a revolutionary❤ And, it’s suggests that we have to think a bit more for ourselves😃
Merriam, I had you color type me and then I lost 100 pounds. I gave away all my fat clothes and had to buy all new. What a great opportunity to recreate my style. I found a brand that is classy, polished and fits my personality and I look for pre-loved clothing on eBay and other sites. I watch all your videos and appreciate your expertise!
Hello Merriam. I hardly ever comment on videos but I felt the urge to tell how grateful I am for this one. First, the way you express yourself is so captivanting, it's a wonder to listen to your thoughts. Your input on the matter makes total sense and really gave me a new (and dare I say, inspiring) perspective. I've been feeling lost in my life for quite some time now, like I have so much to give to the world and to the people around me, but stuck in difficult circumstances that prevent me from doing it. Still, I've been trying to improve what I can control out of it, and one of the things I've been doing is to actually wear the clothes I love the most but would save for a "special occasion". However, I haven't really thought about what other aspects of my life I'm not living according to my own identity, so this video was truly eye-opening. Thank you again.
Hope things get better for you soon. One step at a time and you will get there and you will be the version of you that is authentic and makes you happy!💓 💪🏻 stay strong
This video feels so validating 😂 I basically moved years go to an apartment in front of the sea and I wear only ocean themed stuff 😂 I'm soft natural/true summer and I have lots of boho skirts/dresses with marine prints, Mermaid dresses, everything in blue/turquoise/teal, and lots of chunky necklaces with starfish and seashells... I'm basically one with the ocean ❤
I don't know if you've watched my video called 'your style isn't authentic because your life isn't authentic' but it sounds like you are living an authentic life and your style just naturally follows that.
This resonates massively. I was injured in an accident 14 years ago, I'm paralysed I can't walk or stand - but there are items I can't part with just yet - but I need a way to reconnect to my tried and true style I miss so much. Now, I live in leggings and sports tops even when I'm not working out - it's really sad. Don't give up on dreams
@@brockit79 I feel for you. My 33yr old son who has autism suffered a spinal cord injury almost four years ago and is quadriplegic in a wheelchair. For the first time today he asked if I thought he could possible go to Comic-Con and dress up - but he just couldn’t see how… ( he used to love dressing up in his fantasy cosplay of the Star Wars theme). I said of course we could find something amazing for him to wear.! We had a good chat about how we could look for various cool costume items for him to wear in his chair …. Everyone can be fabulous and follow their style dreams. I really hope that you can too. ❤️
Merriam you are very inspirational. Since last week I picked up my old hairstyling habits again and my self esteem + energy is like a different person. I actually enjoy leaving the house again. I am shocked at how many people are just complimenting me out of nowhere and it hasn't even been a week yet! I was even happily joining in a photograph with friends. Your comment about other areas where we don't advocate for ourselves is very true. Wearing my dream style is my current new years resolution and I really didn't think it was going to be practical for my lifestyle. To wear knit fabrics without snagging them I had to repair the rough and broken things in my home. To wear the soft colors I had to rinse my dishes and pack away the messy art supplies. To wear fuzzy and woolly textures I had to get the pet hair under control and finally get a handheld vacuum cleaner. To wear delicate fabrics I had to teach my puppy not to jump up or walk all over me without asking first. I have to say no to dirty jobs if I'm not dressed for them. People have to ask for me to help now instead of just expecting that I will always be prepared to muck in. I'm realizing that my dream style was not even impractical for my needs - my lifestyle was.
That's a bit far fetched, though I feel it's not ill intended. Adults are also interested in character design and narratives such as those introduced by fictional characters in games and books, so sometimes it's not about bringing that into everyday life.
It's so true. Since I was a teenager I've been wearing gothic/alternative clothing because I love it. Whether it looks good or not is another story. But I've always loved it, I love fantasy elements, vampy, witchy, siren-ish. Absolutely love it and I'll never stop ❤
I love this video so much, it actually made me emotional. It’s so common for people to immediately count out their dreams as frivolous and unnecessary, no matter how small.
it turns out for me, in the past, that my fantasy self was the quite practical but basic French girl style. I would buy these items but never ever wear them. I never felt comfortable I was trying to tone down my self true self which I always believed was the Fantasy self. I had an Aha moment when I realized that my true self is the one that loves a bold and creative look. I would donate my beautiful dresses because I thought they were impractical. I would just miss them so much. Based on what many TH-camrs would say about the Fantasy self, I thought that Fantasy were thos flowy feminine dresses and I had to shift to a more practical wardrobe. But once I flipped it, I felt free. My true self has always been the super feminine, floaty, colorful wardrobe. I used to smile when i would open my closet. But when i decided to get real. I had a wardrobe full of black, grey, denim and was totally depressed but did not know why. I was so uninspired. I am a large woman and thought it would be best for me to blend in- but that was the fantasy. Now I wear what I love!. Fantasy does have a negative connotation and I realized that I has assigned the wrong title to my true style. It took a lot of journaling to come to the understanding that what I was considering the Fantasy was the real me.
So true! Most of us are dressing to match some random imagine of how we “should” look. My body image issues run very deep but I am finally seeing my way out. I’ve recently started sewing a completely new high quality wardrobe that I love. It’s healing my soul on so many levels.
Yes! I've just started putting elements of my "fantasy style" (historical, feminine) back into my wardrobe. I'm much happier now although it did take some confidence to make the change. My look had become very plain and minimal which didn't really suit me looking at photos. It also helped to find my body type this way. Thanks for your perspective on this!
Yes yes yes!!! I think that’s why I’m in a band! I come from a redneck town where blue jeans and tees are the most accepted apparel. However when our band is playing, I can be a little more romantic, medieval, gypsy, hippie, 50’s, cowgirl… Thank you Merriam! ♥️ Your baby sounds so sweet!
I encourage you to wear those clothes to the grocery store and let people stare. I feel like when I do it I’m helping to normalize embracing your dream style!!
Merriam, I love this video and all of your thought-provoking observations. I'm realizing that all of these videos on undertone, essences, kibbe, fashion, makeup are actually not about vanity or shallowness but, like you said in another one of your brilliant videos...they are about finding and becoming our 'true, authentic selves'. I'm a theatrical romantic and I took your suggestion about wearing diamonds when I go grocery shopping. I thought to myself, can I do it? Can I get away with it? So I did! I have a gold necklace with matching bracelet with tiny diamond chips sprinkled throughout both (it's fake costume jewelry but it looks real!) and decided to wear it when I went grocery shopping. And guess what? It felt like no big deal to me but it made me feel more 'authentic' to my true self, more 'normal'. I loved the experiment and I'm going to do more of it.
My fantasy style is Belle from Beauty and the Beast! I'm 54 and a lot of the times I'm drawn to either colors and/or an element that seems very Belle-esk. And yes. I do have Beauty and the Beast items decorations all over my home. 😍
Thank you! When people say declutter the fantasy pieces I'm like "huh? What would I have left to wear?" 😂 I was just touching on this on my channel, too.
I love your perspective on this! Our fantasy selves are so often what drive us into fashion in the first place, and that last bit about ignoring our true selves hit home for me. Looking forward to the next video 😍
I practiced embracing my fantasy style fully in my last job. I felt beautiful and like the best version of myself every day. I was so happy. But I had two female managers above me who abused the sh*t out of me and eventually replaced me. I know from sharing experiences with other young women that this is not a unique experience. The jealousy of other women in the workplace is a major, major issue. When all you’re trying to do is live your best life. I wish it weren’t so. ):
I am so curious (maybe nosy) about your dream style and how you incorporated it into your wardrobe. Also, your video made me think about why I bought certain garments that I loved but then haven't worn for whatever reason.
"this is why I whisper" so relatable, you gotta do what you gotta do to keep a kid asleep 😂 always just thought you had a relaxing voice though haha. Anyways, this is a really great video, thank you
This is probably your best, most important video so far ❤🎉 I hadn’t bought any clothes in years because I never saw anything I liked that much, but then I discovered a brand on instagram that absolutely lit me up inside and now I have a nice collection of bright colors, florals, really artistic prints and super nice fabrics including silk and wool etc, and I wear these things to church where everyone else is for some reason wearing beige, brown, gray, navy and black. It definitely stands out, and people notice, but I love it so much and it makes me feel special, other people tell me they are going to have to start upping their game with their clothes too. I get so many compliments and it really excites people to see it. My more extreme fantasy self is a mid-summer night’s dream type of fairy princess- I might have to start wearing that one at home 😂
Such a beautiful message! Very inspiring! I will keep this in mind for me and my kids! Thank you! Topic suggestion: now please don't think I'm crazy 😅 I often see dog owners having dogs that really match their body type or face features! 😂 How much fun would a video be about that! A black dachshund for example... flamboyant gamine?? 😂 Just a little more fun in our lives❤ I love your videos!
I loved this message Merriam! It’s so important to always have an element of what we love in our lives every day, and that we feel like us when we get dressed. This was just wonderful! And I loved how you call it dream style instead. Loving something doesn’t make it a fantasy.
Interesting take on the topic of "fantasy self". I've never thought of it like this. To me, ditching the "fantasy self" while shopping, can help me to buy clothes that I'll actually wear. Seeing the beautiful pieces in my closet, that I'm too afraid to wear, is straining. But finding my authentic style, is a middle ground between fantasies, and the life I live. That's what's truly satisfying. ☺
So often, as a woman who grew up raised by a single father and brother, i felt embarrassed of my own secret interests in feminine fashion and makeup. It felt too frivalous and vain and I knew I would be scoffed at for trying. At 24, i STILL have these feelings bubbling away under the surface and, i realise now, how i restrict my fashion expression around certain people versus how I feel so much more free around others! Very mentally engaging video concept Merriam, I urge you to make more ❤
What a wonderful way to think about ourselves, our dream styles, how we show up for ourselves and our lives. I too have been in a style rut and it has negatively affected my life. Ty for a compassionate point of view.
I'm a classic and I struggle to project my fantasy style because I can't rock dark feminine for the life of me 😂 I have too much of a sweet/dorky face and I can't accessorize too much because I don't look very well hahaha I need you!
So accessorise other body parts like hair (hat or some jewelled hair clip or mesh, dark flowers. I also imagine something like mesh gloves with jewelled ring or feminine stockings, look for more feminine sensual shoe designs
Wow. Wow. I’ve always agreed with everything you’ve said but have never heard it put in words. It’s incredible how we dress and groom ourselves can be so impactful on how we perceive ourselves, besides how others do which is pretty obvious (or at least I think it is). But you have expressed it so well, it’s not frivolous and we are worth the effort we put into adorning ourselves in an authentic way.
I love all your videos and loved this one as well. This one really speaks to me as someone who wants to dress as a gothic fairy every day. I got some great ideas from this video. 🖤🧚🏽♀️✨
Fantasy/dream-inspired items I've included lately: skorts with some ruffles (done in my colors/kinda mono chromatic), cargo midi skirt (in my colors with a gorgeous tank), beaded boxy silk top, black lace long cardigan...
Hi Merriam, thanks for a great video. I always love your videos and feel I've learned so much from you. Have you considered making a video about how to maintain or develop a style through pregnancy? I'm pregnant and looking to learn how body changes experienced during pregnancy can influence body type and how individuals can honor these changes and either embrace new styles or keep incorporating their current style elements. Would love to learn about this and hear your thoughts/suggestions.
LOVED this video! It's come at a weirdly perfect time as I am just starting to reincorporate my old rock chick style into my life again and it feels amazing! As a teen/20s I wore whatever I wanted - corsets, leathers, band shirts - and felt great. Since adult corporate office life I have toned it back and almost lost it recently until recently a chance conversation inspired me to bring it back again! I resonate so much with what you said about how even one item can change your whole vibe - I've found just a choker or a pair of biker boots really makes me feel more myself, even if everything else is boring and basic! More of these videos would be awesome! ❤
Wow I love this. I never thought about it in those words of a “fantasy” or “dream” style, but this is exactly what I started doing years ago. When I was younger I wore basic jeans and tshirts and tried not to attract too much attention, but I admired historical styles and long beautiful dresses and wished those things would be in style again. One day, I decided, well why not just wear what I love now? I’ve been wearing skirts and dresses and historically inspired elements for years now & Iove it.
I love this. I think the same way and this is basically what I’ve been practicing and honing for years. Lovely to hear you validate that and put it in such an eloquent way.
Hello Merriam! I adore your videos, and your voice is incredibly soothing. I've often read that makeup should highlight your best features. However, when you feel you lack those features, what's the next step? For me, I've found that shifting focus away from my face to my fashion sense is more effective. Being 52, I'm embracing the natural aging of my face with humor. My style is flamboyant gamine, and I'm drawn to edgy looks, though I don't dress flamboyantly every day. Living in Japan adds a layer of complexity due to the stricter age-related dress norms, but as a foreigner, I navigate this with a bit more freedom. Keep up the fantastic work, and sending lots of love your way!
I used to be very much into what is called Kibbe Classic style before I've even learned about Kibbe. Unfortunately I would look ridiculous in a lot of things I loved and eventually I've learned that I'm a soft gamine, and Classic lines, are like, the worst thing ever for me xD Now I'm more into playing out with the impressions I make on people with the help of my lines)))
Thank you! Yes couldn't agree more. I watched the Style Insider and 9ther videos that have talked about fantasy self. My closet is full of Dream self 😊 ...i have more of a Carla Rockmore ethos...over the years o surrounded myself with things I love. I needed to hear this today...we need to wear what we love. I'm likely a dramatic or soft dramatic and my dream clothes suit my lines..but are more dressy or formal but I'm going to work harder att making them work for my everyday. How we feel is not trivial agree with the watching sport analogy. We have to lift each other up and celebrate what we are passionate about. Loved this video Thanks again ❤
Thank you for the authenticity of your message. Love it! 8 hope you will be doing more of these perhaps with added vital examples?...but not necessary as with thus one alone, I came up with ideas for my own wardrobe. Once again, thank you!
Thoroughly enjoyed. Thank you. I also really enjoyed the high neck blouse on you, worn a number of episodes ago. I would be curious to see you explain options on dream style, for inspiration. My dream styles were invariably suited to entirely different body shapes and colour palettes. I think this is what they mean when they say to ditch the fantasy. Thank you again!
My fantasy style is princess. And half my closet is long full cotton tiered dresses with puffy or butterfly sleeves that totally give princess vibe without being uncomfortable. In summer tho I'm in my worst state of health always at that time my fantasy style takes a break lol. Then my toddler aesthetic comes alive. I love not having a job😂 corporate jobs will beat that out of you💔
Hello Merriam! I truly enjoy watching your videos, they are so informative! Would be great if you could also touch upon the body types for teen girls, whether the body type system is applicable to teenagers in any way, since they are different from grown women, but they need a piece of styling advice even more than adults.
Hi Merriam, I think this might be my favourite video of yours so far! My dream style is classic French with maybe a touch of the feminine and bohemian. I don’t go out very often outside of work and class, so I find myself reaching for the same safe items. You’ve inspired me to add small touches to my outfits to bring in more of those elements of my dream style. I also realised that my dream style extends to my hair, and that when I’ve had my long naturally curly, frizzy hair blowdried smooth into a wave by my hairdresser is when I feel like my best soft classic self and I get compliments on how I look. Unfortunately I’m not good with a blowdryer and brush and end up wearing it curly even when I’d love to wear it smooth. If I could just figure out how to do this I’d be really happy ❤
Each Friday at college we had casual day. (The rest of the time we wore uniform). I was always so excited to dress up. Sometimes they had a theme to follow like Bollywood, vampires, hip hop, sporty, etc. I would look through my wardrobe and find an element to incorporate- back then there was no pinterest you youtubers to follow for inspiration. And despite not having many clothes - somehow i could always find something from what I already owned. Now with so many clothing choices and clutter i find it so hard to find inspiration from my clothes.
I love this video. An idea for a future one is how to incorporate your personality type (mbti) and enneagram type into your style when it feels very different from your Kibbe type.
I'm a teacher in Germany. I have long dark wavy/curly hair and am really attractive (I won a model contest once). But one day I did wear a long skirt. I looked feminine. Because, you know, I am a female. The principal back then and the other co-workers started to talk about me: "She looks like a fuckable gypsy". I knew that principal wanted to get in my pants and that the other female co-workers were insanely jealous but this made me sick to my stomach. No one ever defended me there, I heared so many perverted, shallow, primitive things just because I was not acting, talking and dressing like a machine. I am a warm, kind, feminine person who is very hard working and intuitive. So glad I left that place behind. You need to be VERY strong as an attractive woman. They will try to destroy you. Like little kids breaking shiny objects.
Hello am new to yr channel.ive been watching your kibbe annalise..am having problems with what i am..how can i get in touch with you..i love your voice so soft calming ❤
I don't know when to where some of my dresses that look pretty long and historical. There not that costume like but they still feel like a bit much. But I really want to wear them.
7:04 Jumping off this idea of incorporating just one thing in your every day that speaks to your fantasy style₊˚⊹ ࣪ ˖₊ ⊹ I'd say treat yourself to fundamental pieces that you'll have for a long time that speak to your fantasy style and then, 1) there's no "What if I don't have the guts to wear it" guilt and 2) If your bag, shoes, phone case, and everyday chain (or whatever you use everyday, maybe its a backpack, wallet, jacket, and rings ૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა) all reflect your fantasy style, when you're wearing just basics you still feel represented! and it somehow becomes "your style" even if you're not wearing the outfit that goes with it :3 I'm also a designer & diy-er so I love upgrading my basics to be more my style
This very inspiring. I've lost my dream self and I really need to sit down and think about all the things that I am attracted to. Thanks Merriam! BTW How would Julia Roberts wear her lolita style?
I’m 62. My dream style is some strange combination of witchy/ forest dwelling/ fairy / rock chick lol. I feel it relates to past life memories perhaps?… Love this video. Thank you. ❤😊
Interesting…
Every single TH-camr I watch says get rid of the fantasy items! Miriam, this is a revolutionary❤
And, it’s suggests that we have to think a bit more for ourselves😃
we need some pictures to support it ☺
Merriam, I had you color type me and then I lost 100 pounds. I gave away all my fat clothes and had to buy all new. What a great opportunity to recreate my style. I found a brand that is classy, polished and fits my personality and I look for pre-loved clothing on eBay and other sites. I watch all your videos and appreciate your expertise!
Hello Merriam. I hardly ever comment on videos but I felt the urge to tell how grateful I am for this one. First, the way you express yourself is so captivanting, it's a wonder to listen to your thoughts. Your input on the matter makes total sense and really gave me a new (and dare I say, inspiring) perspective. I've been feeling lost in my life for quite some time now, like I have so much to give to the world and to the people around me, but stuck in difficult circumstances that prevent me from doing it. Still, I've been trying to improve what I can control out of it, and one of the things I've been doing is to actually wear the clothes I love the most but would save for a "special occasion". However, I haven't really thought about what other aspects of my life I'm not living according to my own identity, so this video was truly eye-opening. Thank you again.
Hope things get better for you soon. One step at a time and you will get there and you will be the version of you that is authentic and makes you happy!💓 💪🏻 stay strong
❤😊
This video feels so validating 😂 I basically moved years go to an apartment in front of the sea and I wear only ocean themed stuff 😂 I'm soft natural/true summer and I have lots of boho skirts/dresses with marine prints, Mermaid dresses, everything in blue/turquoise/teal, and lots of chunky necklaces with starfish and seashells... I'm basically one with the ocean ❤
Also I never feel out of place because of where I live basically... I imagine that if I was living in a city I would look like a clown 🤡
I don't know if you've watched my video called 'your style isn't authentic because your life isn't authentic' but it sounds like you are living an authentic life and your style just naturally follows that.
@@merriamstyle I've watched It... OMG if I ever have to move out and I can't be a 24/7 Mermaid anymore It would be so hearthbreaking ,🥲🥲🥲
I can relate to some of this 🙂🙂
This resonates massively.
I was injured in an accident 14 years ago, I'm paralysed I can't walk or stand - but there are items I can't part with just yet - but I need a way to reconnect to my tried and true style I miss so much. Now, I live in leggings and sports tops even when I'm not working out - it's really sad. Don't give up on dreams
@@brockit79 I feel for you. My 33yr old son who has autism suffered a spinal cord injury almost four years ago and is quadriplegic in a wheelchair. For the first time today he asked if I thought he could possible go to Comic-Con and dress up - but he just couldn’t see how… ( he used to love dressing up in his fantasy cosplay of the Star Wars theme). I said of course we could find something amazing for him to wear.! We had a good chat about how we could look for various cool costume items for him to wear in his chair …. Everyone can be fabulous and follow their style dreams. I really hope that you can too. ❤️
Merriam you are very inspirational.
Since last week I picked up my old hairstyling habits again and my self esteem + energy is like a different person. I actually enjoy leaving the house again. I am shocked at how many people are just complimenting me out of nowhere and it hasn't even been a week yet! I was even happily joining in a photograph with friends.
Your comment about other areas where we don't advocate for ourselves is very true. Wearing my dream style is my current new years resolution and I really didn't think it was going to be practical for my lifestyle.
To wear knit fabrics without snagging them I had to repair the rough and broken things in my home. To wear the soft colors I had to rinse my dishes and pack away the messy art supplies. To wear fuzzy and woolly textures I had to get the pet hair under control and finally get a handheld vacuum cleaner.
To wear delicate fabrics I had to teach my puppy not to jump up or walk all over me without asking first. I have to say no to dirty jobs if I'm not dressed for them. People have to ask for me to help now instead of just expecting that I will always be prepared to muck in.
I'm realizing that my dream style was not even impractical for my needs - my lifestyle was.
I think that many adults are into cosplay because they can't integrate their fantasy/ dream self style into their daily lives.
That's a bit far fetched, though I feel it's not ill intended. Adults are also interested in character design and narratives such as those introduced by fictional characters in games and books, so sometimes it's not about bringing that into everyday life.
It's so true. Since I was a teenager I've been wearing gothic/alternative clothing because I love it. Whether it looks good or not is another story. But I've always loved it, I love fantasy elements, vampy, witchy, siren-ish. Absolutely love it and I'll never stop ❤
twins :3♡
Beautifully said, the “if a had a daughter” example was especially heartwarming.
Yes, that hit
I love this video so much, it actually made me emotional. It’s so common for people to immediately count out their dreams as frivolous and unnecessary, no matter how small.
it turns out for me, in the past, that my fantasy self was the quite practical but basic French girl style. I would buy these items but never ever wear them. I never felt comfortable I was trying to tone down my self true self which I always believed was the Fantasy self. I had an Aha moment when I realized that my true self is the one that loves a bold and creative look. I would donate my beautiful dresses because I thought they were impractical. I would just miss them so much. Based on what many TH-camrs would say about the Fantasy self, I thought that Fantasy were thos flowy feminine dresses and I had to shift to a more practical wardrobe. But once I flipped it, I felt free. My true self has always been the super feminine, floaty, colorful wardrobe. I used to smile when i would open my closet. But when i decided to get real. I had a wardrobe full of black, grey, denim and was totally depressed but did not know why. I was so uninspired. I am a large woman and thought it would be best for me to blend in- but that was the fantasy. Now I wear what I love!. Fantasy does have a negative connotation and I realized that I has assigned the wrong title to my true style. It took a lot of journaling to come to the understanding that what I was considering the Fantasy was the real me.
I'm so glad more people start to realize that "practical" really isn't just one style for everyone. Only you can decide what's practical for you ❤
Thank you, dear Merriam! your beautiful soul creates a beautiful community!
So true! Most of us are dressing to match some random imagine of how we “should” look. My body image issues run very deep but I am finally seeing my way out. I’ve recently started sewing a completely new high quality wardrobe that I love. It’s healing my soul on so many levels.
Id like to see examples of encorpotating your dream style.
Yes! I've just started putting elements of my "fantasy style" (historical, feminine) back into my wardrobe. I'm much happier now although it did take some confidence to make the change. My look had become very plain and minimal which didn't really suit me looking at photos. It also helped to find my body type this way. Thanks for your perspective on this!
Yes yes yes!!! I think that’s why I’m in a band! I come from a redneck town where blue jeans and tees are the most accepted apparel. However when our band is playing, I can be a little more romantic, medieval, gypsy, hippie, 50’s, cowgirl…
Thank you Merriam! ♥️ Your baby sounds so sweet!
Maybe as an artist you could get away wearing more eccentric stuff off stage as well? Right?!
I encourage you to wear those clothes to the grocery store and let people stare. I feel like when I do it I’m helping to normalize embracing your dream style!!
@@rebekahnewman3876 every town has to have a crazy old lady! Haha
@@vivimaria7243 yes! Eccentric! That’s the word!
I love your deep dives❤
Merriam, I love this video and all of your thought-provoking observations. I'm realizing that all of these videos on undertone, essences, kibbe, fashion, makeup are actually not about vanity or shallowness but, like you said in another one of your brilliant videos...they are about finding and becoming our 'true, authentic selves'. I'm a theatrical romantic and I took your suggestion about wearing diamonds when I go grocery shopping. I thought to myself, can I do it? Can I get away with it? So I did! I have a gold necklace with matching bracelet with tiny diamond chips sprinkled throughout both (it's fake costume jewelry but it looks real!) and decided to wear it when I went grocery shopping. And guess what? It felt like no big deal to me but it made me feel more 'authentic' to my true self, more 'normal'. I loved the experiment and I'm going to do more of it.
Beautiful wise words, thank you 🙏🏼
My fantasy style is Belle from Beauty and the Beast! I'm 54 and a lot of the times I'm drawn to either colors and/or an element that seems very Belle-esk. And yes. I do have Beauty and the Beast items decorations all over my home. 😍
What a wonderful and much needed video. Thanks
This is such an inspiring and compassionate video which came at the perfect time for me. Thank you.
Thank you! When people say declutter the fantasy pieces I'm like "huh? What would I have left to wear?" 😂 I was just touching on this on my channel, too.
I love your perspective on this! Our fantasy selves are so often what drive us into fashion in the first place, and that last bit about ignoring our true selves hit home for me. Looking forward to the next video 😍
I practiced embracing my fantasy style fully in my last job. I felt beautiful and like the best version of myself every day. I was so happy. But I had two female managers above me who abused the sh*t out of me and eventually replaced me. I know from sharing experiences with other young women that this is not a unique experience. The jealousy of other women in the workplace is a major, major issue. When all you’re trying to do is live your best life. I wish it weren’t so. ):
This side part really suits you the most!
I am so curious (maybe nosy) about your dream style and how you incorporated it into your wardrobe. Also, your video made me think about why I bought certain garments that I loved but then haven't worn for whatever reason.
"this is why I whisper" so relatable, you gotta do what you gotta do to keep a kid asleep 😂 always just thought you had a relaxing voice though haha. Anyways, this is a really great video, thank you
This is probably your best, most important video so far ❤🎉 I hadn’t bought any clothes in years because I never saw anything I liked that much, but then I discovered a brand on instagram that absolutely lit me up inside and now I have a nice collection of bright colors, florals, really artistic prints and super nice fabrics including silk and wool etc, and I wear these things to church where everyone else is for some reason wearing beige, brown, gray, navy and black. It definitely stands out, and people notice, but I love it so much and it makes me feel special, other people tell me they are going to have to start upping their game with their clothes too. I get so many compliments and it really excites people to see it. My more extreme fantasy self is a mid-summer night’s dream type of fairy princess- I might have to start wearing that one at home 😂
This is a great video and I hope you do more deep dives into the psychological aspects of our styles and how we feel about ourselves
I love the term “ dream style”. Thank you for diving into this topic! ❤
Being your own advocate is so important❤
You nailed it when you brought it in context to your home. That hit like a ton of bricks! Thank you for being so thoughtful and introspective.
Such a beautiful message! Very inspiring! I will keep this in mind for me and my kids! Thank you!
Topic suggestion: now please don't think I'm crazy 😅 I often see dog owners having dogs that really match their body type or face features! 😂 How much fun would a video be about that! A black dachshund for example... flamboyant gamine?? 😂 Just a little more fun in our lives❤
I love your videos!
that would be so adorable! I don't know if you saw it, because it's a super old video, but I did make a video about body types of teddy bears.
Love these talks!!!!
I loved this message Merriam! It’s so important to always have an element of what we love in our lives every day, and that we feel like us when we get dressed. This was just wonderful! And I loved how you call it dream style instead. Loving something doesn’t make it a fantasy.
Interesting take on the topic of "fantasy self". I've never thought of it like this. To me, ditching the "fantasy self" while shopping, can help me to buy clothes that I'll actually wear. Seeing the beautiful pieces in my closet, that I'm too afraid to wear, is straining. But finding my authentic style, is a middle ground between fantasies, and the life I live. That's what's truly satisfying. ☺
So often, as a woman who grew up raised by a single father and brother, i felt embarrassed of my own secret interests in feminine fashion and makeup. It felt too frivalous and vain and I knew I would be scoffed at for trying. At 24, i STILL have these feelings bubbling away under the surface and, i realise now, how i restrict my fashion expression around certain people versus how I feel so much more free around others!
Very mentally engaging video concept Merriam, I urge you to make more ❤
Where were you all my life ??? 😁😂
What a wonderful way to think about ourselves, our dream styles, how we show up for ourselves and our lives. I too have been in a style rut and it has negatively affected my life. Ty for a compassionate point of view.
I love this. You have to keep your personality as part of your style. That’s what makes us unique.
I need a cat woman costume in dark teal. Its me . MEOOOW!!!
This was a really beautiful Video, Merriam! It spoke to me in a very kind way. Would like to hear more of your thoughts in chat videos like this one😊
Thank you Merriam. xxxx
Im so glad I found your channel!
I'm a classic and I struggle to project my fantasy style because I can't rock dark feminine for the life of me 😂 I have too much of a sweet/dorky face and I can't accessorize too much because I don't look very well hahaha I need you!
So accessorise other body parts like hair (hat or some jewelled hair clip or mesh, dark flowers. I also imagine something like mesh gloves with jewelled ring or feminine stockings, look for more feminine sensual shoe designs
Wow. Wow. I’ve always agreed with everything you’ve said but have never heard it put in words. It’s incredible how we dress and groom ourselves can be so impactful on how we perceive ourselves, besides how others do which is pretty obvious (or at least I think it is). But you have expressed it so well, it’s not frivolous and we are worth the effort we put into adorning ourselves in an authentic way.
Great video, thank you.
Love the message. Thank you Merriam ❤
I love all your videos and loved this one as well. This one really speaks to me as someone who wants to dress as a gothic fairy every day. I got some great ideas from this video. 🖤🧚🏽♀️✨
What an important message you're sending ❤
Fantasy/dream-inspired items I've included lately: skorts with some ruffles (done in my colors/kinda mono chromatic), cargo midi skirt (in my colors with a gorgeous tank), beaded boxy silk top, black lace long cardigan...
Thank you so much for this video. ❤️ Your message needed to be said.
Loved this perspective
Hi, would be nice to make a video about how to incorporate the fantasy style in a way that works with all the kibbe body types. Good video.
Hi Merriam, thanks for a great video. I always love your videos and feel I've learned so much from you. Have you considered making a video about how to maintain or develop a style through pregnancy? I'm pregnant and looking to learn how body changes experienced during pregnancy can influence body type and how individuals can honor these changes and either embrace new styles or keep incorporating their current style elements. Would love to learn about this and hear your thoughts/suggestions.
I love this! Bring on the dream ❤
I love this! Will definitely be thinking about this a lot
Hi Merriam, please do more videos on Theatrical romantics like casual clothes, makeup, hair etc🙂I feel like most videos focus on Romantics
😍🙆💖 I love the idea of my dream style and how to incorporate it 👸💅
LOVED this video! It's come at a weirdly perfect time as I am just starting to reincorporate my old rock chick style into my life again and it feels amazing! As a teen/20s I wore whatever I wanted - corsets, leathers, band shirts - and felt great. Since adult corporate office life I have toned it back and almost lost it recently until recently a chance conversation inspired me to bring it back again!
I resonate so much with what you said about how even one item can change your whole vibe - I've found just a choker or a pair of biker boots really makes me feel more myself, even if everything else is boring and basic!
More of these videos would be awesome! ❤
Wow I love this. I never thought about it in those words of a “fantasy” or “dream” style, but this is exactly what I started doing years ago. When I was younger I wore basic jeans and tshirts and tried not to attract too much attention, but I admired historical styles and long beautiful dresses and wished those things would be in style again. One day, I decided, well why not just wear what I love now? I’ve been wearing skirts and dresses and historically inspired elements for years now & Iove it.
Could you share where you find your favorite items? Thnx
@@briannah1915 Many times I find things at 2nd hand stores or ThredUp, and I have also found some nice things on Etsy.
i really see a Sage/Mystic/Mother Essencse in you Merriam
I'd also add Goddess. A Goddess speaks what is on her mind whether others deem it harsh or not. She says what she says with authority ;D
I love this. I think the same way and this is basically what I’ve been practicing and honing for years. Lovely to hear you validate that and put it in such an eloquent way.
Hello Merriam! I adore your videos, and your voice is incredibly soothing. I've often read that makeup should highlight your best features. However, when you feel you lack those features, what's the next step? For me, I've found that shifting focus away from my face to my fashion sense is more effective. Being 52, I'm embracing the natural aging of my face with humor. My style is flamboyant gamine, and I'm drawn to edgy looks, though I don't dress flamboyantly every day. Living in Japan adds a layer of complexity due to the stricter age-related dress norms, but as a foreigner, I navigate this with a bit more freedom. Keep up the fantastic work, and sending lots of love your way!
Thank you! I’m learning a lot from you!
This was like w free therapeutic session :D
I used to be very much into what is called Kibbe Classic style before I've even learned about Kibbe. Unfortunately I would look ridiculous in a lot of things I loved and eventually I've learned that I'm a soft gamine, and Classic lines, are like, the worst thing ever for me xD
Now I'm more into playing out with the impressions I make on people with the help of my lines)))
Outstanding! 😊🎉❤
I love your whisper
Yes more of these videos ❤
Thank you! Yes couldn't agree more. I watched the Style Insider and 9ther videos that have talked about fantasy self. My closet is full of Dream self 😊 ...i have more of a Carla Rockmore ethos...over the years o surrounded myself with things I love. I needed to hear this today...we need to wear what we love. I'm likely a dramatic or soft dramatic and my dream clothes suit my lines..but are more dressy or formal but I'm going to work harder att making them work for my everyday. How we feel is not trivial agree with the watching sport analogy. We have to lift each other up and celebrate what we are passionate about. Loved this video Thanks again ❤
Great video! Definitely food for thought.
Thank you for the authenticity of your message. Love it! 8 hope you will be doing more of these perhaps with added vital examples?...but not necessary as with thus one alone, I came up with ideas for my own wardrobe. Once again, thank you!
Thoroughly enjoyed.
Thank you.
I also really enjoyed the high neck blouse on you, worn a number of episodes ago.
I would be curious to see you explain options on dream style, for inspiration.
My dream styles were invariably suited to entirely different body shapes and colour palettes. I think this is what they mean when they say to ditch the fantasy.
Thank you again!
Dream Style, yes❤
Love it! I really got an epiphany re my dream self!
Haha, I heard your child and thought it was mine
I looove this philosophy!! I also would watch decluttering or minimalist videos of people listing tips and saying that. I also felt conflicted.
My fantasy style is princess. And half my closet is long full cotton tiered dresses with puffy or butterfly sleeves that totally give princess vibe without being uncomfortable. In summer tho I'm in my worst state of health always at that time my fantasy style takes a break lol. Then my toddler aesthetic comes alive. I love not having a job😂 corporate jobs will beat that out of you💔
Hello Merriam! I truly enjoy watching your videos, they are so informative! Would be great if you could also touch upon the body types for teen girls, whether the body type system is applicable to teenagers in any way, since they are different from grown women, but they need a piece of styling advice even more than adults.
Hi Merriam, I think this might be my favourite video of yours so far! My dream style is classic French with maybe a touch of the feminine and bohemian. I don’t go out very often outside of work and class, so I find myself reaching for the same safe items. You’ve inspired me to add small touches to my outfits to bring in more of those elements of my dream style. I also realised that my dream style extends to my hair, and that when I’ve had my long naturally curly, frizzy hair blowdried smooth into a wave by my hairdresser is when I feel like my best soft classic self and I get compliments on how I look. Unfortunately I’m not good with a blowdryer and brush and end up wearing it curly even when I’d love to wear it smooth. If I could just figure out how to do this I’d be really happy ❤
Love this vid!
Appreciate this
Each Friday at college we had casual day. (The rest of the time we wore uniform). I was always so excited to dress up. Sometimes they had a theme to follow like Bollywood, vampires, hip hop, sporty, etc. I would look through my wardrobe and find an element to incorporate- back then there was no pinterest you youtubers to follow for inspiration. And despite not having many clothes - somehow i could always find something from what I already owned. Now with so many clothing choices and clutter i find it so hard to find inspiration from my clothes.
Thank you very much 🖤
I love this video. An idea for a future one is how to incorporate your personality type (mbti) and enneagram type into your style when it feels very different from your Kibbe type.
Yes! Love this
It's getting interesting ❤️
I'm a teacher in Germany. I have long dark wavy/curly hair and am really attractive (I won a model contest once). But one day I did wear a long skirt. I looked feminine. Because, you know, I am a female. The principal back then and the other co-workers started to talk about me: "She looks like a fuckable gypsy". I knew that principal wanted to get in my pants and that the other female co-workers were insanely jealous but this made me sick to my stomach. No one ever defended me there, I heared so many perverted, shallow, primitive things just because I was not acting, talking and dressing like a machine. I am a warm, kind, feminine person who is very hard working and intuitive. So glad I left that place behind. You need to be VERY strong as an attractive woman. They will try to destroy you. Like little kids breaking shiny objects.
Hello am new to yr channel.ive been watching your kibbe annalise..am having problems with what i am..how can i get in touch with you..i love your voice so soft calming ❤
thank you for your interest! I do offer typing services, and you can learn more at merriamstyle.com.
I love this.
Instead "fantasy style" it could be called your DREAM STYLE ❤, edit: lol than you said it🥰
I don't know when to where some of my dresses that look pretty long and historical. There not that costume like but they still feel like a bit much. But I really want to wear them.
Love this❤!
7:04
Jumping off this idea of incorporating just one thing in your every day that speaks to your fantasy style₊˚⊹ ࣪ ˖₊ ⊹ I'd say treat yourself to fundamental pieces that you'll have for a long time that speak to your fantasy style and then, 1) there's no "What if I don't have the guts to wear it" guilt and 2) If your bag, shoes, phone case, and everyday chain (or whatever you use everyday, maybe its a backpack, wallet, jacket, and rings ૮₍ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ₎ა) all reflect your fantasy style, when you're wearing just basics you still feel represented! and it somehow becomes "your style" even if you're not wearing the outfit that goes with it :3 I'm also a designer & diy-er so I love upgrading my basics to be more my style
This very inspiring. I've lost my dream self and I really need to sit down and think about all the things that I am attracted to. Thanks Merriam! BTW How would Julia Roberts wear her lolita style?
Merriam, your thoughts and kind presentation are definitely spoken by an expert! Not much good teaching out there