I just recovered from literally crying. Snot running out of my nose, couldn't breathe. That shit was hilarious. Man I haven't laughed like that in maybe ten years...
I worked with "at risk youth" and this is exactly what it was like. When they got annoyed they would bring up something completely unforgivable and then say "what? I'm just saying"
this one boy i know is a few years younger than the rest of us and now he's kind of really mature, but when he was smaller me and his big sister used to have to deal with him very very very violently assaulting other kids and occaisionally teachers or random people and he genuinely didnt seem to think he had done anything wrong. he is currrently at least 6'4 as a 14 year old. i love him but he is terrifying.
@@quack2thesequel the often told us not to disclose anything about ourselves because they would most likely eventually use it against us. I can't think of an example where that happened specifically since it was over ten years ago. Just in general you would have some breakthrough moment like "my mom was an addict too" to help the kid know hes not alone and then later on they would bring up your mom's addiction in front of everyone when you pissed them off. Then by 9 pm that night they would ask you for a bedtime snack like they didn't completely violate you haha
Assuming “The kid” isn’t Nick, it’s hysterical that at ten years old the thing he found funny wasn’t the action of the destruction of the doll house but the consequences that he knew where coming
@@MattHawkesPurdywizard nick. Its from the cumtown fantasy bit, where nick is a wizard that orchestrated a centuries long conflict between orcs and men. "For 5000 years i've been cursed to have gay sex."
Was at the liquor store in line behind a lady who had her kid with her, and the kid asked the guy behind the counter, "Why do you get bigger every time we come here?"
This is one of my favorites because the mannerisms, the scenarios, even some of the lines are 100% spot on for a type of vaguely neglected lower middle class white kid in high school, which was all of my friends and myself included. It really brings me back to a time in my life where I could just launch a personal attack on someone I barely knew and revel in it
That part about making the divorce worse is something I did to my mom. I wrote a letter to my dad about what a piece of shit her boyfriend was and how they had sex while we were in the house. God, the fight they had made all the trouble I got from her totally worth it.
Honestly though why do divorced parents think its okay to have sex with their new boyfriend/girlfriend when their kids are over where they can clearly hear that? I should've slapped my mom for that.
@@mrscruffles801probably because they hate their lives? They hate their spouses. They are stuck with these kids they totally regret. Someone is paying attention to them and they don’t give a F.
@@mrscruffles801damn bro I caught my mom getting her back blown out on the MAIN sitting couch in the living room, not the fuckin ‘cuddle couch’ by her boyfriend of a couple months I haven’t loved a single family member since, and they all hate me, but at least I hated them all first since first grade. Fuck you, Mom
For you Americans out there , if you want to get taste of what Australian high school life is like watch summer heights high , can't believe that got a reference
When I was in 8th grade there was this (pretty young, fresh degree, not particularly hot though) teacher who loved me for whatever reason and went so far beyond the line of what you would do and how you would speak with a student. She held my bowl for me once when I had to go to the principals office, used to buy me smokes, and had good taste in music. She had a tattoo of Goofy on her asscheek, which she did indeed show me once. What made it even more insane was that she was the daughter of a teacher who had been there for easily 25 years so that made it even more bizarre. As an adult it’s surreal as hell that this woman was so unhinged to be buying smokes and showing her asscheek tattoo off to an 8th grader in between talks about Pink Floyd. Insane to think about with any amount of perspective.
I had this history teacher in both 7th and 8th grade (young redhead, all freckled up so she wasn't like one of the hot redheads but definitely still passable) and she would always have me help grade quizzes and homework with her and we'd talk about music and video games and other bullshit and for some fuckin reason, maybe because I was like the one 13 year old who knew and liked Steely Dan, she thought it would be appropriate to tell me about her and her fiance's sex playlist and the way they would play Sonic together as like, foreplay. Very weird, but she always recommended good TV shows and music to me so she was alright in the end.
I have a feeling that Nick is going to end up like the Anthony and Stav like Opie from the Opie and Anthony show. Every time I listen to these old episodes I die laughing from Nick or Adam, stav just sits in the corner and chuckles
Nick cutting off Adam just in the voice of the bad kid is hilarious and you know he was the kid that would get in trouble and immediately blame anybody else 😂
Adam talking about his body is always funnier than Stav becuase Stav will admit that he’s short and fat but Adam refuses to accept that he’s like 5’8” and 115 pounds. He legitimately looks like a child.
adam used cheats to get spider-man which is why it wasn’t on the save file when he rebooted it he got mad at his cousin for his own being bad at video games and cheating
I got a way with rhyming things And I got a knack for timing things It’s like finding gold when you see I got style all around like the band of a diamond ring In this game I know imma victor cuz I’m rapping tighter than a boa constrictor. Other rappers fail it’s embarrassing, I may be white but yall Pale in comparison.
"damn it Adam!" with his English dad walking out of the children's birthday party with gay 9 yr old Adam in roller blades following his dad Who's just pissed annoyed you keep getting molested
I like how nicks interpretation of the rape atory its like a new teacher that isnt accustomed to dereks behavior and stav’s version is that one teacher thats been there 15 years and is just used to his antics
My favorite part about this bit, is it’s just Nick describing things he did
ASK HER, SHE PROBABLY DID IT
I dont think he has a sister so who's dollhouse was he destroying?
@@linusdn2777his own
@@linusdn2777 adams
he's got at least one step sister but no biological siblings@@linusdn2777
“Every time we come over here for Yom Kippur Adam gets raped!”
goated line
The prankster kit is easily one of my favorite Cumtown bits of all time
Shit made me fall to the ground when they mentioned the affidavit
Hall of fame bit
Kids only.
a signed affidavit
I just recovered from literally crying. Snot running out of my nose, couldn't breathe. That shit was hilarious.
Man I haven't laughed like that in maybe ten years...
I worked with "at risk youth" and this is exactly what it was like. When they got annoyed they would bring up something completely unforgivable and then say "what? I'm just saying"
Like what?
this one boy i know is a few years younger than the rest of us and now he's kind of really mature, but when he was smaller me and his big sister used to have to deal with him very very very violently assaulting other kids and occaisionally teachers or random people and he genuinely didnt seem to think he had done anything wrong. he is currrently at least 6'4 as a 14 year old. i love him but he is terrifying.
@@megagrips6470you love him though? Sounds like an abusive relationship. Can’t find a Betterman?
@@quack2thesequel the often told us not to disclose anything about ourselves because they would most likely eventually use it against us. I can't think of an example where that happened specifically since it was over ten years ago. Just in general you would have some breakthrough moment like "my mom was an addict too" to help the kid know hes not alone and then later on they would bring up your mom's addiction in front of everyone when you pissed them off. Then by 9 pm that night they would ask you for a bedtime snack like they didn't completely violate you haha
Sounds like something I do as an adult
That "kid" was 100 percent Nick.
Hahahahahaha yeah
And he was 25 when this all happened
@@mrscruffles801 And it was Adam's dollhouse.
This was mee as well.
no
It's uncanny how well Nick knows how this kid behaves.
That’s because it’s him
Uncanny? More like very gay
@@waggna469 uncanny? more like ungayny
Gay? More like uncunny.
Assuming “The kid” isn’t Nick, it’s hysterical that at ten years old the thing he found funny wasn’t the action of the destruction of the doll house but the consequences that he knew where coming
I mean, should we really be giving stav the benefit of the doubt that he wasnt the kid who sucked off the black guys?
Kids be smart sometimes
Exactly, he wasn’t stoked about it breaking, he’s stoked about a little girl being upset about it
I like when these clips have chess videos as the background so i can pretend im smart and gay instead of just gay
I’m gay
see but im just gay tho
@@Tripplebeem respect
Punching down like your driving excalibur into the stone is an insane bar to drop out of nowhere
Doesn’t Excalibur get pulled from the stone?
@@HarrisonHollerssomeone had to put it there
@@MattHawkesPurdy I sound like a dork but isn’t that Merlin? Arthur pulls the sword and becomes king
@@HarrisonHollers well then Nick was referring to when Merlin punched the sword down into the rock
@@MattHawkesPurdywizard nick. Its from the cumtown fantasy bit, where nick is a wizard that orchestrated a centuries long conflict between orcs and men.
"For 5000 years i've been cursed to have gay sex."
10:30 I'm gonna miss the bit where Stav produces a joke, Nick immediately steals it, and Stav laughs maniacally. One of nicks biggest crutches
Let's be honest. Adam leads the whole show. The only one who has the real jokes.
Nick really managed to gaslight everyone into thinking he's the only funny one by just never laughing at the other twos jokes
@@B.C.101 Adam is a classic puppet master
Stav has fans?
It really is the perfect podcast setup. Adam guides the conversation, Stav makes the first joke, and Nick improvs off of them.
That "IDIOT" kills me everytime
What? He's n idiot!
I remember being in vacation Bible school and a kid asked the teacher “why are you so fat?”
VBS. I remember those days
Was at the liquor store in line behind a lady who had her kid with her, and the kid asked the guy behind the counter, "Why do you get bigger every time we come here?"
9:15 "Um ma'am, was it from kissing?" 😂 I love how Nick's shithead character pops up every once in a while
Dirty Johnny
Possibly their best ever bits
Lick
adam’s mom fucking dogs was pretty good
I feel like I think this is the funniest shit I’ve ever heard and then I watch another clip and then that one is the funniest. Top tier all around
“I had a teacher in like 9th grade- Spanish teacher- whose like first semester” “What’d she teach?” “Spanish” “Oh, interesting” “Oh”
Classic
Nick thought Adam was referring to her ethnicity like he always does
This is one of my favorites because the mannerisms, the scenarios, even some of the lines are 100% spot on for a type of vaguely neglected lower middle class white kid in high school, which was all of my friends and myself included. It really brings me back to a time in my life where I could just launch a personal attack on someone I barely knew and revel in it
Nick reliving his glory days as a youth
I’m glad I can rewatch these since I don’t really remember any of the episodes I watched
I used to play chess and listen to podcasts. Now I'm bad at chess. But this guys plays chess so I don't have to.
Outchessed by the master
These guys have made punching down an art form.
"Gaslight your mom with the whoopie cushion" is the funniest sentence ever uttered by man.
Something tells me Nick was a "Jonathan" growing up
I listen to this so often. I cackle at horrible kids.
The moral of the story… Adam never got Spider-Man
Comedy about a bad kid is just South Park
Nick being extra Nick like in these clips
There was “this kid”, and he was mean and bullied everyone, but sometimes it was funny.
This is Nick trying to tell his origin story.
I was so happy to hear the Summer Heights High reference. I only know one other person who watched that incredible show.
Never heard of it
my family still has it on dvd lol
That part about making the divorce worse is something I did to my mom. I wrote a letter to my dad about what a piece of shit her boyfriend was and how they had sex while we were in the house.
God, the fight they had made all the trouble I got from her totally worth it.
Honestly though why do divorced parents think its okay to have sex with their new boyfriend/girlfriend when their kids are over where they can clearly hear that? I should've slapped my mom for that.
@@mrscruffles801 Horny. Makes people do stupid things. and most single moms needed to be filled up to feel good about themselves.
You're going to hell when you die, bro.
@@mrscruffles801probably because they hate their lives? They hate their spouses. They are stuck with these kids they totally regret. Someone is paying attention to them and they don’t give a F.
@@mrscruffles801damn bro I caught my mom getting her back blown out on the MAIN sitting couch in the living room, not the fuckin ‘cuddle couch’ by her boyfriend of a couple months
I haven’t loved a single family member since, and they all hate me, but at least I hated them all first since first grade. Fuck you, Mom
That show exists, it’s called Crayon Shin-chan. It’s just a Japanese kid that sucks and his parents hate him.
And it's kinda for kids!
@@kanna-san.with the exception for the funimation dub that adult swim aired, which is absolutely amazing
For you Americans out there , if you want to get taste of what Australian high school life is like watch summer heights high , can't believe that got a reference
Great show!
Jonathan has blond spiky hair flame shorts and is basically Stewart from Beavis and Butt-Head
Or todd
i fell off my chair at the whoopee cushion bit and it kept fucking going
When I was in 8th grade there was this (pretty young, fresh degree, not particularly hot though) teacher who loved me for whatever reason and went so far beyond the line of what you would do and how you would speak with a student.
She held my bowl for me once when I had to go to the principals office, used to buy me smokes, and had good taste in music.
She had a tattoo of Goofy on her asscheek, which she did indeed show me once.
What made it even more insane was that she was the daughter of a teacher who had been there for easily 25 years so that made it even more bizarre.
As an adult it’s surreal as hell that this woman was so unhinged to be buying smokes and showing her asscheek tattoo off to an 8th grader in between talks about Pink Floyd.
Insane to think about with any amount of perspective.
Did you smash?
damn, thats awesome, u almost got some childhood experiences
> She had a tattoo of Goofy on her asscheek, which she did indeed show me once.
Bro could you miss a hint harder in 8th grade?
I had this history teacher in both 7th and 8th grade (young redhead, all freckled up so she wasn't like one of the hot redheads but definitely still passable) and she would always have me help grade quizzes and homework with her and we'd talk about music and video games and other bullshit and for some fuckin reason, maybe because I was like the one 13 year old who knew and liked Steely Dan, she thought it would be appropriate to tell me about her and her fiance's sex playlist and the way they would play Sonic together as like, foreplay. Very weird, but she always recommended good TV shows and music to me so she was alright in the end.
Man I woulda been painfully boned up in my bugle boy jeans the entirety of time spent with either of these teachers( freckled red head/goofy tattoo)
I have a feeling that Nick is going to end up like the Anthony and Stav like Opie from the Opie and Anthony show. Every time I listen to these old episodes I die laughing from Nick or Adam, stav just sits in the corner and chuckles
Anyone else mad he missed the easiest checkmate ever
I didn’t. I don’t know how to play chess.
I'm happy
He used the lil devil let’s players chess prank kit, parents not allowed
I'm so dumb. I was wondering how it would be mate, but then I saw the queen. I think that's mate in 3, right?
"Oh no! What's going on in this room?"
That childhood friend was 100% Sam Hyde
Holy shit how is this pod off the air, this shit is comedy gold.
Dude missed clear checkmate twice
Go to the office, Derek
So today I learned that Nick was an “at risk” youth.
"...oh yeah... I was severely retarded..." 😂 💀
what a clutch win on that time
What chess game site is this? Looks good as hell
adam's dad storming off on roller blades
Nick cutting off Adam just in the voice of the bad kid is hilarious and you know he was the kid that would get in trouble and immediately blame anybody else 😂
Fun fact, the whoope cushion was invented by the roman emperor heliogabolus
Adam talking about his body is always funnier than Stav becuase Stav will admit that he’s short and fat but Adam refuses to accept that he’s like 5’8” and 115 pounds. He legitimately looks like a child.
parents not allowed! 🔐
17:54 Re1 is forced mate in that position
this is stav's cardio
adam used cheats to get spider-man which is why it wasn’t on the save file when he rebooted it
he got mad at his cousin for his own being bad at video games and cheating
17:58 you get to live at an orphanage, it’s on an island- doesn’t that sound cool ?
They described the show denis the menace
I laughed so hard at work from this lol my co workers were asking what's so funny
There was a show like this. It was called Kevin Spencer
I already heard these a dozen times im just enjoying the quality chess gameplay
They traded licks so he changed it to fighting about Tony Hawk so TECHNICALLY, he didn’t lie.
Kid Nick is just like Cartman
That first kid rocks
"Can't have recess" because of rain? No way that's a thing.
Was a thing when i was in elementary school
@@rishishard4742 like cancelled entirely or did you have to spend it in the gym/cafeteria.
@@BIacklcein the hallway outside the classroom playing board games or coloring books etc.
@@GahMorninJulia
gotcha, yeah we had that too or just in the gym (during the winter)
About 12 minutes in you misplay by moving the queen to E6 when you should have rook to c3
Jonathan and Derek were both bad kids.
17:45 Re1 wins
7:45 Just amazing. Height of comedy.
They need to get Tim Robinson on the phone *now.*
11:13
it's like oney plays + mbmbam
ep number?
I was a bad kid. My first three periods were in special ed
8:49 this is like that WKUK sketch
What's the whoopie cushion ep number?
Lmao little prankster.
the part about mom is savage ))
I got a way with rhyming things
And I got a knack for timing things
It’s like finding gold when you see I got style all around like the band of a diamond ring
In this game I know imma victor cuz I’m rapping tighter than a boa constrictor.
Other rappers fail it’s embarrassing, I may be white but yall Pale in comparison.
"Americus brief" huh? Nick truly is a high school dropout.
9:12 missed en passant
What's Nick's elo rating?
Thumbnail looks like Tom Holland
I think that show was the Andy milenokis show
i like when they start bullying adam for cheating in tony hawk and then he actually did cheat😂
Can we talk about how horrendous the first guy was at chess
I got serially molested by one of those kids nick is spot on, the class was also mixed year :^(
that's hilarious
@@The-xp4xj thanks I find it funny too because im gay now, and it has nothing to do with being molested......
@@internationalparam more like seriously molested (because it made you gay)
@@internationalparam sure it didn't
@@internationalparam it’s literally why you’re gay
13:00
"damn it Adam!" with his English dad walking out of the children's birthday party with gay 9 yr old Adam in roller blades following his dad
Who's just pissed annoyed you keep getting molested
His dad's South African.
2:27
Dang nick is good at chess
Not really, at 17:51 they missed mate in 2.
You never got spiderman 😂
bart simpson
I like how nicks interpretation of the rape atory its like a new teacher that isnt accustomed to dereks behavior and stav’s version is that one teacher thats been there 15 years and is just used to his antics
10:41
When I watched the Dennis the menace cartoon this is what I thought it would be like. Big letdown I gotta say
Get A New Daddy by Trevor Moore on wkuk is funny
At least name the episode if you're gonna steal someone's content.
we know this is you, cool adam
Nick Mullen doesn't believe in intellectual property rights. Also, you're gay.
Don't act like you pay them on patreon, gay man.
Says the guy watching the stolen content for free. Also I'm gay
Bro they’re 3 of the laziest guys I’ve ever seen. Nobody cares
Yeah that last bit was basically a ripoff of Trevor Moores get a new daddy music video.still laughed my ass of though.
I wouldn't say ripoff in all fairness, the premise is obviously similar but Nick put a pretty different spin on it
LMAO
damn
2024
Huey Barrymore is better. His vids are much better and he plays run 3 , get your money up not your funny up. #respect