Hurt people feed off of healed people to avoid dealing with their pain. I have made that mistake by getting into their lane and not staying in mine. Let go, let God!
Thank you Pastor Blake’s this is a blessing learning from the word of God wow it speaks to my spirit. I have been in this battle for 16yrs now I’m learning how to navigate through the deception. Pastor Blake’s you have given me freedom and liberty this makes so much sense today you are a blessing in my life.
The Holy Spirit has sweetly whispered to me - when I've engaged a toxic person, that it is a spirit behind the person. He would say that I should always remember that we don't wrestle with flesh and blood (humans). These battles are won in prayer.
This can also have you staying with a toxic person because you believe it’s not them they don’t mean to be so disturbingly toxic……Leave them where they are!
No Body CAN CHANGE ANYONE. MEMO! People CHANGE IF THE SEE A BENEFIT for themselves. Not for ANYBODY out side. Present possible character changes will enrich their lives. Try it. Your efforts may have to be STEADY & CONSISTENT PRESENTATIONS/OFFERS AND LEAD BY EXAMPLE. TEACH them how to conduct themselves. Praise them if they do it. Make em FEEL GOOD 👍👀👀👀GOOD BEHAVIORS EARN REWARDS. TRY IT for 6 months. Or for life if u get GOOD results. Some people like to LEARN NEW WAYS TO LIVE LIFE BETTER!!!👍 It will be challenging. Some people LIKE Challenges.
Do NOT TEACH WITH EMOTIONS. TEACH with LOGICAL REASONING & by your LEADERSHIP. LEAD BY GOOD EXAMPLES daily. Teach train self & those you LOVE LOGICALLY & emotionally & SPIRITUALLY everyday 24/7. Take CHARGE. MANAGE TO TEACH your behaviors to others around you. REWARDS Need to be given daily. Try the CHALLENGES.👍❗✌👌
I just found his channel last week and I have been binge watching! I cant tell you HOW MUCH revelation I got! I found myself sad that my father didn't instill in me what he is talking about on this video. It would have saved me from so much heart ache and pain. The daddy issues video broke me down! Like OMG! You KNOW it has to be the spirit leading him because HOW can a man speak to women SOULS?? I'm so grateful!!!
Very sad mentally and spiritually state that narc and toxic people are in... we serve a merciful and wonderful God He is always ready to help and forgive us (when we want his help and forgiveness) Only if the narc and toxic people can see and feel it... it would be soooo much better for the them There’s nothing like the peace of God excels everything( mind, heart, and soul Always pray for them Very sad
The church has had a lopsided doctrine of walking in love and virtually nothing about wolves in sheep's clothing..predators and their soul destroying tactics and what to do about it. Many times women are told to go home and submit to the toxic abusive so called husband. Hopefully this is changing.
The Bible doesn't say submit to toxic people and neither did RC Blakes in this video. There's a difference between what toxic people in a church might say to manipulate you and what God says.
Exactly. This information that we have nowadays on the internet about toxic people is very helpful. We need to know the reality of life in the real world and we need to know we are not responsible for their bad behavior, we are only responsible for our own actions.
Elijah was attacked by the spirit that is in Jezebel because he was tired. Narcissists have such an evil spirit. You have to be prayed up and be TOTALLY SUBMITTED to the LORD JESUS to face them.
Toxic people are very dangerous individuals Toxic people are not about you it’s about them They do keep you trap emotionally and mentally Toxic people are very hard to befriend and love You have to become someone else to please them
@@flowerpink33 @Jen Will, truly stay away from them then. Maybe you could say to them: 'I love you and if you ever need help, if I can I want to give it to you, but if you don't change how you're treating me, I stay away from you'.
I managed to get away from my toxic person. My finances are drained. and my bones are still broken. Get away from them! I left before I was another Shannan Watts. Every day i prayed outloud. Oh my Lord deliver me out of the hands of the wicked, the unrighteous and the cruel man! Thank you Jesus!
This was very triggering...Im in the process of eliminating toxic family members. Literally everyone in my family is toxic! It's depressing...and angering...😒😣
It is so true, toxic people do use their free will to stay in their horrible behavior. They know this behavior is not normal or accepted so they put on an act in order to get you. Toxic people would rather change and destroy you and hang on to their false/fake selves. How can you love someone else when you can't even love yourself?
Oh lord. I've done all these. In this order with a narcissist. I had to finally surrender and let him go. Accept that he is not going to change and the only thing I can change is removing myself from the bondage which only God gave me the strength and courage to do.
I literally can't be around my immediate family of origin. Bullying started in childhood from my mother and she groomed my siblings to side with her and now I'm 60 and the fighting never stopped and the grandchildren fight me because of of generational toxic behavior. I have had to block them and just stopped going around them during the last 15 years and I get sick around them so I stay away for my sanity and mental health and peace 🙏🏽
You say that you're not a therapist but you're ALWAYS be Dr. Pastor R.C. Blakes in my book! Your're the surgeon on my heart and soul (mind,will and emotions)!!!
Wow this literally hAppend to me fri! I was crying so hard asking how did i end up looking crazy in front of ppl and he look innocent when i didn’t do a thing! Now i know its my reaction vs response! Im thankful for this msg!!
Palmetto bugs. Cockroaches w wings. Lol. Those are still very much a thing. I lived down south for almost 20 years. Yes they do make you run. Lol. I just got out of a very toxic and emotionally abuse relationship and I truly appreciate your videos on this subject matter. I struggle w trauma bonding and pray that it breaks soon 🙏💔
Thank you Pastor Blake's. This was right on time! My supervisor is toxic. She talks badly about others, tells people to shut up, & tries to get others to ostracize the meek person while calling them crazy because they're in fight mode from her bullying. I see everyone try to please her after she displays bad behaviour. I started my flight but decided to stay. I spoke to the owner of the company about her, & while I don't want her to lose her job, he told me that I'm the 8th person in my position in 6 months that has wanted to resign because of her. She's that bad! After hearing this video, I believe that God put me there to do His work. To be a light in a dark place. I pray for peace. I'm protected & she cannot touch me. She's angry because I vibrate on a higher level & don't react from her mess. It takes every restraint that I have not to become angry & give her what she puts out but that's what she want...to call me crazy too. When she's in her gaslighting zone, I tell her those tricks aren't going to work & that I'm going to pray for her unsettled soul. 😄 She tries to make me stumble but because of you & my life's experiences, I know that a positive or no reaction is much more powerful than a negative one. She doesnt deserve any of my energy & I protect it. She can poke & probe all she wants but this door is locked.
Miss Q great sister. I’ve dealt with many abusive and narcissistic personalities. Today was a huge step I took by removing myself from a committee that a narc sits on. I feel great that I took my power back. I think it’s fantastic that you recognize that God is bigger than our problems and decided to stay. However, your mental and emotional health is key ... I know that’s your job, and there’s no getting around the treatment she dishes out . But, try to stay outta her way as much as possible. It’s NOT good for you. I pray your suit of armor is on tight. This is wickedness she’s displaying and it’s not Holy. God said to Be Ye Holy. When people make a conscience decision to mistreat people abusing their power I call that evil. Resist the devil. Be a light to those who need you, and receive your light. Not her. She’s anti-light.
And the reason you CAN'T love someone INTO changing is because who a person is....is who they ARE! When they show YOU who they ARE BELIEVE THEM. And the second reason you CAN'T love someone INTO change....THEY WILL DISRESPECT YOU. EVEN MORE THAN THEY ALREADY DO BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR YOURSELF TO TAKE THEIR ABUSE!! LIKE I HAVE HEARD THOSE PEOPLE SAY IF A MAN OR A WOMAN IS STUPID ENOUGH TO BE USED....THEY DESERVE WHAT THEY GET!!
Such a blessing! Sooooo thankful I found this page last week. I have watched over 16 videos this past weekend. I laughed, cried but most importantly I got revelation! Thank you for being authentic and allowing God to use you!!!!
I am so blessed to have come to this channel. The Lord Himself guided me here. I am in a very toxic relationship that I knew from the very beginning was not of God. But my assignment is coming to a close. Pastor 36:46 you said "you cannot love a toxic person into changing their nature". This is so true and I don't try. The late, great Dr. Mya Angelo said When people show you who they are believe them the 1st time. When ever I'm around him for any length of time it is a draining experience. I am in college now, studying Psychology and I know for sure that this is what God has planned for my life. Thank you Pastor Blake's just found out that you live in Louisiana so do I. It's a wonder that I have NEVER heard a man or woman of God speak on such an important topic. But I know the Lord works in mysterious ways. I love your channel so. 💓💖💞❣
My teenage daughter is going threw it today,,Today in Jesus Christ name I as her mother wil put a stop to it it’s hard I no with Jesus I’ll never get weak
I recognize all of these reactions as part of PTSD. I am working on these reactions within myself with professional help for CPTSD . I have spent all of my life around narcissistic people and it also took a toll on my physical health. Thank you for your message
Thank you so much for your videos and especially this one spoke to me a lot; I was married to a bully and have encountered them in the workplace. I think that I have fled, fought, froze and fawned all four, but I am learning and getting better at spotting toxic people and how to not react to them. It is very hard to learn when you grow up in disfunction, but I am growing and doing better. I will go to God and think of how Jesus would handle these toxic people. Thank you again for your videos.
Whewww, these messages/lessons are so brutally honest and so necessary! I have displayed ALL of these reactions in my marriage. I was the ultimate "silly woman" for sure! So blessed to have you in my life Pastor. So very blessed I am! Thank you!!
Excellent advice and I have been caught in the trap of reacting like a fool to the abuse of the narcissist far too many times. I prayed often to be able to observe and not absorb. It is difficult! Your advice is spot on however!
My immediate family has been the most toxic people i have ever experienced in my life and i am 37 years old still working to undo the damage they have caused.
Love love the topic of pushing bottoms I have that on my job too many haters. Thanks This message it was much needed. I will slow down listen and not react to anger. Praise God!
I have two toxic people in my life, and I react in 2 different ways. One is anger, and the other I avoid . Thank you for your advice on encouraging myself.
In a work setting you have no choice but to flee. Especially when you are directed to work closely to the toxic person. She or he will do just anything to sabotage your performance. I have been there many times. Watch out your health its more important than a job. You loose your health you wont be able to work anyway
Yup. I totally understand this. I live with a toxic person & they are exactly the person you’re describing. I don’t react, however. I Respond, truthfully and with Godliness. It costs me my voice but it protects me from the impact of the person’s negative energy.
Your messages are really helping me, dealing with trauma bonding. I am trying to stay within my boundaries and he's constantly touching me inappropriately and I have no peace! He doesn't speak negativity but instead over compensates with being a provider and overly clingy.. Those on the outside think he's amazing meanwhile I just want to get away. We aren't pursuing Christ at the same level but some are telling me to "be patient". I am planning my strategic exit. ❤
Thank you RC blakes for your unselfish way in which you share knowledge by having the father-daughter talk with those of us who have not had that and can appreciate that coming from a man of God thank you very much for your uplifting queenology I truly appreciate the gift of knowledge God bless you and your family
Omg!!! Yes! I grew up in Miami…. We had the flying roaches. Thank you so much for your teachings!!!! Coming from narcissistic abuse…. I appreciate you.
Absolutely right on. The Victim is usually a covert or introverted narcissist as well, or suffers from Stockholm Syndrome or Pathological Naivety, these make a perfect pair. I believe you are correct that one has to go alone through a crucifixion to rehabilitate the soul and become a sovereign authentic person that lives the will of God.
my question for myself is am I toxic how am I toxic and why. I am not malicious I believe my soul is broken and my whole family was toxic we devoured each other like dogs and then wondered why we are the way we are distant, untrusting, and cold toward each other
thank you for your feedback. you are right. my parents fought til midnight blaming each other then went down the line blaming us kids for their problems.
WOW PASTOR RC. BLAKES, THAT WAS 100% ON POINT!!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING SO MUCH TRUTH, I AM A BETTER WOMAN BECAUSE OF IT!!! I LOVE YOU AND 1ST. LADY LISA, THANK YOU BOTH SO MUCH FOR SHARING GOD'S LOVE AND CARE FOR US!!!💛 😇😇😇
Thank you for your prayer of encouragement, yes, bullies are everywhere clothed as normal personalities; however, sick psychologically with narcissistic mindsets. Thank God for Jesus, who teaches us differently and encourages us to exhibit the Fruits of the Spirit recognizing that, these personalities are damaged psychologically and spiritually.
I'm in My kitchen in Grand Rapids, Mi cleaning collard greens at 2am just thanking God for Lisa and Pastor RCBLAKES! We are only 1 month into this year and I feel I have come so far since I oops upon your site! Man what a blessing you have been in such a short time.
Anna Randa Yes please. Especially in the church environment. I’ve dealt with more toxic manipulative people at church than the world. The diabolical part about it is they use scripture and religious mumble jumble to justify their foolishness. When you get upset and defend yourself, they stand back and watch the “devil” at work when it’s them.
It's the trauma that creates the drama in you. You cannot change water into wine...Only God can do that. As a man showith in his nature (character), so he is.
Yes, the sad thing is these people are everywhere. I learned in the last 2 years, well that’s not true, I always knew, that my mother js very toxic. She can’t understand why my siblings are the way that they are. She thinks she has nothing to do with why they behave the way they do. I got out from amongst the toxicity and they are all talking about me. Mind you, I don’t live anywhere near them. I mind my own business and the only time I know what’s going on with them is if she tells me. I don’t stick my nose in their business. Shift this to the people I know (associates). I run from toxic people with the quickness. I will drop you like a hot potato when I see that you are a toxic two-faced gossip. These people will draw you in and then act confused when people distance themselves from them. People with a sense of integrity don’t want to deal with folks like this. Especially if I’m trying to stay spiritually healthy. These people will swear up and down they love the lord but will talk about the preacher like a dog. I’m not going to deal with those demons. I’m taking a flight up out of their life!! I’ll pray for them and wish them well but these people are not good for me and my walk with Christ. Thank you for the video!
I love walking away(& running when necessary-like Joseph did). Jesus evaded toxic people often. I disconnect(emotionally, conversationally, mentally, spiritually) by all means. I have better things to do with my intellect, creativity, attention, energy & time. I deliberately become boring ! It's a daily process to put on the love of Christ and put off environmental(in every realm) toxins-however they manifest.
....those particular roaches are called water bugs. They corral where there is standing water, filth, and/or certain trees grow. Thank God that you don't have to worry about that anymore. They're in nice neighborhoods, as well as, communities that grow or harvest pecan trees. Keep that word coming. I share your videos with the members of my Single Parents Ministry and with my non-profit recipients, "It Takes A Village Family Services". I believe in tough love while being empathetic. I hope to have you as a guest speaker in the future in the ATL #Carrollton. Until then....You have my ear, sir.
Linda Robles Ro-Bless Thank you for letting us know about the big roaches being attracted to Pecan trees (my neighbors as a kid had pecan trees, so now it makes sense why there were flying roaches)...any other trees that you know attract them? As you can see, I am terrified of them. I am thinking about planting stuff, but trying to avoid pests. God bless!
I don’t have pecan trees but I have a lot of trees around my home and my exterminator told me those flying roaches/ water bugs live in the trees I have. They terrify me too!
This is a wonderful video! But it's SOOOOOO hard to not react when you live with toxic people and narcissists. They will push you and push you and push you. It practically takes nerves of steel to not react. They will lie, gaslight and trick you. They even love to make you feel and look crazy! I'm working on these suggestions, but I've found the best thing is if you have a good support system away from the toxic people. They can give you the strength you need to remain sane. Unfortunately I've lost almost all of my support system (due to people moving away), which is why I've gone back to therapy. May God bless anyone dealing with these types of people and may you find peace and joy, even in the small things.
This video is right on point. In the beginning my Narc ''friend'' hid who she really was and portrayed herself as a decent human being than the signs started to show. She would cut me off and over talk me while I was talking, walk in front of me leaving me behind so she could be in the lead, Give back handed compliments, Would be snide and sarcastic with me. When ii got engaged it really set her off she didn't like when people would tell me my ring was beautiful or asking me about my wedding plans she stared wearing random rings on her ring finger even though she was not engaged all because she is Insecure, Jealous and Envious. Now that I am married her has resulted to stalking me, making up lies about me tried to steal my friends and failed the list goes on. So glad I cut her out of my life. It eats her alive that I am doing good in life and truly happy. She is nothing but a Narcissist'!
You look great Pr Blakes! I like your suit. It is such a lovely color! Thank you for another great commentary with great perspective/ insight on this subject.
You gave a very good illustration because as a child I use to watch my bother play with tiny rattlesnakes. They were the size of a worm and still had the poison to kill an adult person.
Yes, so much truth... I just gave a toxic person her walking papers.she took it personally, of course, and even moved to a different table to sit,I can feel her negative energy from across the room,but it's just okay,I feel much better as I am not being drained from her.
Yes!.. these people are very talented,..gifted,...smooth talkers,... to get you some how to go in a different direction than you originally were heading. Well explained 🙂
I have a few in my family, I dealt with one on a job. Now, other toxic people on my job take it to a new level. Pastor Blake, yes, make you fight and look foolish..But, God will give you wisdom!..
Elijah temporarily forgot who his God is. Jezebel wasn't a regular woman, SHE ruled Israel, not Ahab. The reason Elijah ran is because Jezebel was powerful, extremely cruel, and basically the King. It was like the King sent a death threat to Elijah and if not for God, she would do it.
This was my life for 2 yrs and this person tried to get my friends and family against me but in the meantime I was fighting their substance abuse, all I wanted to do was to try and help them. How profound is this, response from them, I have never kneeled to pray. AMEN
Thank you for the prayer to heal the hearts broken by toxic people. You are so right that they are just about everywhere and it's important to guard your heart but be open to positive, loving people God intends for us to have in our lives.
Thank you for always speaking to us Daughters out here💖I'm from San Antonio Tx and I'm now leaving a 5 year emotionally and physically abusive relationship.
I just hit the human mute button on toxic narcissist people. they don't deserve any of my time or space. Peace and Love All.
Hurt people feed off of healed people to avoid dealing with their pain. I have made that mistake by getting into their lane and not staying in mine. Let go, let God!
Lori Lynette Amen!!!
Lori Lynette Wow, the way you said that is brilliant! God bless!
Ahmen perfectly stated!!! I just smh, stay in my lane and pray for them. The queen in me leaves them alone.
Thank you Pastor Blake’s this is a blessing learning from the word of God wow it speaks to my spirit. I have been in this battle for 16yrs now I’m learning how to navigate through the deception. Pastor Blake’s you have given me freedom and liberty this makes so much sense today you are a blessing in my life.
seems so..omg
The Holy Spirit has sweetly whispered to me - when I've engaged a toxic person, that it is a spirit behind the person. He would say that I should always remember that we don't wrestle with flesh and blood (humans). These battles are won in prayer.
This will be my mantra in my current situation. Thanks
Amen!
Yes exactly
Veda brown and ij_ both of your comments are right on point I repetitively have to remind myself of this constantly
This can also have you staying with a toxic person because you believe it’s not them they don’t mean to be so disturbingly toxic……Leave them where they are!
You cannot love a toxic person into changing their nature.
I learned that the HARD way! Smh
I learned the hard way.
No Body CAN CHANGE ANYONE. MEMO! People CHANGE IF THE SEE A BENEFIT for themselves. Not for ANYBODY out side. Present possible character changes will enrich their lives. Try it. Your efforts may have to be STEADY & CONSISTENT PRESENTATIONS/OFFERS AND LEAD BY EXAMPLE. TEACH them how to conduct themselves. Praise them if they do it. Make em FEEL GOOD 👍👀👀👀GOOD BEHAVIORS EARN REWARDS. TRY IT for 6 months. Or for life if u get GOOD results. Some people like to LEARN NEW WAYS TO LIVE LIFE BETTER!!!👍 It will be challenging. Some people LIKE Challenges.
Do NOT TEACH WITH EMOTIONS. TEACH with LOGICAL REASONING & by your LEADERSHIP. LEAD BY GOOD EXAMPLES daily.
Teach train self & those you LOVE LOGICALLY & emotionally & SPIRITUALLY everyday 24/7. Take CHARGE. MANAGE TO TEACH your behaviors to others around you. REWARDS Need to be given daily. Try the CHALLENGES.👍❗✌👌
@Mika Facts!
You’re the father I have always wanted. Thank you for your wisdom.
I just found his channel last week and I have been binge watching! I cant tell you HOW MUCH revelation I got! I found myself sad that my father didn't instill in me what he is talking about on this video. It would have saved me from so much heart ache and pain. The daddy issues video broke me down! Like OMG! You KNOW it has to be the spirit leading him because HOW can a man speak to women SOULS?? I'm so grateful!!!
Very sad mentally and spiritually state that narc and toxic people are in...
we serve a merciful and wonderful God
He is always ready to help and forgive us (when we want his help and forgiveness)
Only if the narc and toxic people can see and feel it... it would be soooo much better for the them
There’s nothing like the peace of God excels everything( mind, heart, and soul
Always pray for them
Very sad
He is just as human as your father...He just SURRENDERED TO GOD
🙌🏾
Amen
Every time you hang out with a toxic person, you feel exhausted.
Boundaries and having a voice for yourself when dealing with toxic people causes them to either explode or go ghost/silent.
Yes...& when they're silent, they're exploding & plotting. 😄 Once you learn how to stay neutral & not react to them, it drives them nuts.
Mrs. B so true.
💯💯💯
Mrs. B explode in my case at the minute
Explosive!
The church has had a lopsided doctrine of walking in love and virtually nothing about wolves in sheep's clothing..predators and their soul destroying tactics and what to do about it. Many times women are told to go home and submit to the toxic abusive so called husband. Hopefully this is changing.
The frustrating thing about that is of you read the bible it talks repeatedly about being decieved and narcissistic types. Makes you wonder🤔
The Bible doesn't say submit to toxic people and neither did RC Blakes in this video. There's a difference between what toxic people in a church might say to manipulate you and what God says.
Exactly
this is so true
Exactly. This information that we have nowadays on the internet about toxic people is very helpful. We need to know the reality of life in the real world and we need to know we are not responsible for their bad behavior, we are only responsible for our own actions.
Elijah was attacked by the spirit that is in Jezebel because he was tired. Narcissists have such an evil spirit. You have to be prayed up and be TOTALLY SUBMITTED to the LORD JESUS to face them.
This comment requires more likes
Toxic people are very dangerous individuals
Toxic people are not about you it’s about them
They do keep you trap emotionally and mentally
Toxic people are very hard to befriend and love
You have to become someone else to please them
You cant please a narc
You have the best explanation about this toxicity that I put myself in .I give up finally, peace
Now.. I clearly see why God instruct seek his face before making any decisions
It's so hard when the toxic people are your parents...
This comment should have 10k likes
Cut them off. You are not obligated to any toxic people, including those that the DNA 🧬 matches. Let em go and pray for them.
It's especially hard when they're your parents. They know how to push our buttons.....because they were the ones who installed them!
May the Gods bless you. I hope you can move out as soon as possible.
@@flowerpink33 @Jen Will, truly stay away from them then. Maybe you could say to them: 'I love you and if you ever need help, if I can I want to give it to you, but if you don't change how you're treating me, I stay away from you'.
Oh my. I picked up that rattlesnake. He bit me and I gave everything I had to try to help him. He is pure evil and no one can help.
Imagine being married to one for 27 years!!
Do NOT LISTEN TO TOXIC PEOPLE. IGNORE your enemys.
I managed to get away from my toxic person. My finances are drained. and my bones are still broken. Get away from them! I left before I was another Shannan Watts. Every day i prayed outloud. Oh my Lord deliver me out of the hands of the wicked, the unrighteous and the cruel man! Thank you Jesus!
You took a stand for your life! Also a restraining order is taking a stand..... not running away. You can never stay in harms way...
A toxic person separates you from your will, sense of peace, purpose, and confidence.
This was very triggering...Im in the process of eliminating toxic family members. Literally everyone in my family is toxic! It's depressing...and angering...😒😣
Same! Put distance between you and them. I am going through the same!
how are things now? It's been 2 years
It is so true, toxic people do use their free will to stay in their horrible behavior. They know this behavior is not normal or accepted so they put on an act in order to get you. Toxic people would rather change and destroy you and hang on to their false/fake selves. How can you love someone else when you can't even love yourself?
Oh lord. I've done all these. In this order with a narcissist. I had to finally surrender and let him go. Accept that he is not going to change and the only thing I can change is removing myself from the bondage which only God gave me the strength and courage to do.
I literally can't be around my immediate family of origin. Bullying started in childhood from my mother and she groomed my siblings to side with her and now I'm 60 and the fighting never stopped and the grandchildren fight me because of of generational toxic behavior. I have had to block them and just stopped going around them during the last 15 years and I get sick around them so I stay away for my sanity and mental health and peace 🙏🏽
You say that you're not a therapist but you're ALWAYS be Dr. Pastor R.C. Blakes in my book! Your're the surgeon on my heart and soul (mind,will and emotions)!!!
Thank you 🙏
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. People are who they are, we should believe them and act accordingly. This came as a reminder. Thank you so much. The data of dating ☝🏾.
"run into the middle of the street and get run over by a car, trying to get away from the roach"🤣🤣🤣
ButterCookie I can relate!!!
Wow this literally hAppend to me fri! I was crying so hard asking how did i end up looking crazy in front of ppl and he look innocent when i didn’t do a thing! Now i know its my reaction vs response! Im thankful for this msg!!
Palmetto bugs. Cockroaches w wings. Lol. Those are still very much a thing. I lived down south for almost 20 years. Yes they do make you run. Lol. I just got out of a very toxic and emotionally abuse relationship and I truly appreciate your videos on this subject matter. I struggle w trauma bonding and pray that it breaks soon 🙏💔
Thank you Pastor Blake's. This was right on time! My supervisor is toxic. She talks badly about others, tells people to shut up, & tries to get others to ostracize the meek person while calling them crazy because they're in fight mode from her bullying. I see everyone try to please her after she displays bad behaviour. I started my flight but decided to stay. I spoke to the owner of the company about her, & while I don't want her to lose her job, he told me that I'm the 8th person in my position in 6 months that has wanted to resign because of her. She's that bad!
After hearing this video, I believe that God put me there to do His work. To be a light in a dark place. I pray for peace. I'm protected & she cannot touch me. She's angry because I vibrate on a higher level & don't react from her mess. It takes every restraint that I have not to become angry & give her what she puts out but that's what she want...to call me crazy too. When she's in her gaslighting zone, I tell her those tricks aren't going to work & that I'm going to pray for her unsettled soul. 😄 She tries to make me stumble but because of you & my life's experiences, I know that a positive or no reaction is much more powerful than a negative one. She doesnt deserve any of my energy & I protect it. She can poke & probe all she wants but this door is locked.
Miss Q great sister. I’ve dealt with many abusive and narcissistic personalities. Today was a huge step I took by removing myself from a committee that a narc sits on. I feel great that I took my power back. I think it’s fantastic that you recognize that God is bigger than our problems and decided to stay. However, your mental and emotional health is key ... I know that’s your job, and there’s no getting around the treatment she dishes out . But, try to stay outta her way as much as possible. It’s NOT good for you. I pray your suit of armor is on tight. This is wickedness she’s displaying and it’s not Holy. God said to Be Ye Holy. When people make a conscience decision to mistreat people abusing their power I call that evil. Resist the devil. Be a light to those who need you, and receive your light. Not her. She’s anti-light.
Yessss
And the reason you CAN'T love someone INTO changing is because who a person is....is who they ARE! When they show YOU who they ARE BELIEVE THEM. And the second reason you CAN'T love someone INTO change....THEY WILL DISRESPECT YOU. EVEN MORE THAN THEY ALREADY DO BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR YOURSELF TO TAKE THEIR ABUSE!! LIKE I HAVE HEARD THOSE PEOPLE SAY IF A MAN OR A WOMAN IS STUPID ENOUGH TO BE USED....THEY DESERVE WHAT THEY GET!!
👏👏👏👏👏 They will disrespect and disregard you!
Such a blessing! Sooooo thankful I found this page last week. I have watched over 16 videos this past weekend. I laughed, cried but most importantly I got revelation! Thank you for being authentic and allowing God to use you!!!!
Welcome btw him and TG we ste really blessed.
Say it again, bullies are everywhere. We just have to learn to leave with them. PERIOD!!!
I am so blessed to have come to this channel. The Lord Himself guided me here. I am in a very toxic relationship that I knew from the very beginning was not of God. But my assignment is coming to a close. Pastor 36:46 you said "you cannot love a toxic person into changing their nature". This is so true and I don't try. The late, great Dr. Mya Angelo said When people show you who they are believe them the 1st time. When ever I'm around him for any length of time it is a draining experience. I am in college now, studying Psychology and I know for sure that this is what God has planned for my life. Thank you Pastor Blake's just found out that you live in Louisiana so do I. It's a wonder that I have NEVER heard a man or woman of God speak on such an important topic. But I know the Lord works in mysterious ways. I love your channel so. 💓💖💞❣
My teenage daughter is going threw it today,,Today in Jesus Christ name I as her mother wil put a stop to it it’s hard I no with Jesus I’ll never get weak
Seriously SELF-CONTROL MINDFUL STABILITY. CHOICE FOR SAFETY.
So true about toxic people. Had me reacting negatively 🙏☹️#wont get me again unclean spirit 💯
I recognize all of these reactions as part of PTSD. I am working on these reactions within myself with professional help for CPTSD . I have spent all of my life around narcissistic people and it also took a toll on my physical health. Thank you for your message
Thank you so much for your videos and especially this one spoke to me a lot; I was married to a bully and have encountered them in the workplace. I think that I have fled, fought, froze and fawned all four, but I am learning and getting better at spotting toxic people and how to not react to them. It is very hard to learn when you grow up in disfunction, but I am growing and doing better. I will go to God and think of how Jesus would handle these toxic people. Thank you again for your videos.
Whewww, these messages/lessons are so brutally honest and so necessary! I have displayed ALL of these reactions in my marriage. I was the ultimate "silly woman" for sure! So blessed to have you in my life Pastor. So very blessed I am! Thank you!!
Excellent advice and I have been caught in the trap of reacting like a fool to the abuse of the narcissist far too many times. I prayed often to be able to observe and not absorb. It is difficult! Your advice is spot on however!
44 of the people that disliked the video are Toxic ! You are truly transforming my life Pastor! I Love you and your wife! Praise Yah!
Flight, Fight, Freeze, Fawning You cannot love a toxic person into changing 😟😟
Its fawning sis.
@@nikkyshamz2696 Thankyou siz for correction 😊😊 Greatly appreciate😊😊 that's why i had bolded it coz i had not understood 😊😊
@@quantumfieldinitiation9843 you welcome sis💞
My immediate family has been the most toxic people i have ever experienced in my life and i am 37 years old still working to undo the damage they have caused.
Amen!! Jesus came to heal the broken hearted and restore the shattered souls!
Love love the topic of pushing bottoms I have that on my job too many haters. Thanks This message it was much needed. I will slow down listen and not react to anger. Praise God!
I have two toxic people in my life, and I react in 2 different ways. One is anger, and the other I avoid . Thank you for your advice on encouraging myself.
I love that quote 🙏🏾 I RATHER DIE ON MY FEET, THEN LIVE ON MY KNEES 👀. By Emiliano Zapata (1877-1919)
I never had a reference for it. Thanks.
RC Blakes, Jr for you 🙏🏾 No problem
@@RCBlakesJr. I have been battling this all my life and want to overcome this. Is there a follow up teaching to this....a how to?
You are so right.
I live with a toxic person and he has always made me to react, then acts as the victim 😳
May the Lord help us.
Look up narcissism here on TH-cam and see if he has any of the traits, then RUN!!!
@@kimhamilton363 thank you
Family does this over pets and family outings
Those roaches are still around! You have given me so much strength after forfeiting my soul to a toxic evil person! Thank you so much!
In a work setting you have no choice but to flee. Especially when you are directed to work closely to the toxic person. She or he will do just anything to sabotage your performance. I have been there many times. Watch out your health its more important than a job. You loose your health you wont be able to work anyway
That’s why we need to read more.... reading gives knowledge and focus. Thank you 😊
I was surrounded by a lot of toxic people and this mans teaching as well as others has helped me greatly..
Thank you for another healing message.
2 years later this video is still helpful 🙏🏽 Thank you!
Yup. I totally understand this. I live with a toxic person & they are exactly the person you’re describing. I don’t react, however. I Respond, truthfully and with Godliness. It costs me my voice but it protects me from the impact of the person’s negative energy.
Your messages are really helping me, dealing with trauma bonding. I am trying to stay within my boundaries and he's constantly touching me inappropriately and I have no peace! He doesn't speak negativity but instead over compensates with being a provider and overly clingy.. Those on the outside think he's amazing meanwhile I just want to get away. We aren't pursuing Christ at the same level but some are telling me to "be patient". I am planning my strategic exit. ❤
PrettyPoet P I feel you sis, I almost married one.
1. We flee. 2. We fight. 3. We freeze. 4. We fawn.
Yes Sir,
They aim to add pain to your life!
No matter how much you want to help a scorpion or try to love them, they will always sting you because that is their nature! Remember that…
Thank you RC blakes for your unselfish way in which you share knowledge by having the father-daughter talk with those of us who have not had that and can appreciate that coming from a man of God thank you very much for your uplifting queenology I truly appreciate the gift of knowledge God bless you and your family
Omg!!! Yes! I grew up in Miami…. We had the flying roaches. Thank you so much for your teachings!!!! Coming from narcissistic abuse…. I appreciate you.
"Do not be miss lead; bad company corrupts good character.
What a nice suit! I really feel like I'm at church! Lisa picked that out. Lol. God bless you
Absolutely right on. The Victim is usually a covert or introverted narcissist as well, or suffers from Stockholm Syndrome or Pathological Naivety, these make a perfect pair. I believe you are correct that one has to go alone through a crucifixion to rehabilitate the soul and become a sovereign authentic person that lives the will of God.
my question for myself is am I toxic how am I toxic and why. I am not malicious I believe my soul is broken and my whole family was toxic we devoured each other like dogs and then wondered why we are the way we are distant, untrusting, and cold toward each other
thank you for your feedback. you are right. my parents fought til midnight blaming each other then went down the line blaming us kids for their problems.
All in the timing. Thank you Rc Blakes🙏🏻
Keep CALM. HUSH! SAy Thank you.
I'm so encouraged and inspired. What can j say i wished I saw these videos before.
WOW PASTOR RC. BLAKES, THAT WAS 100% ON POINT!!! THANK YOU FOR SHARING SO MUCH TRUTH, I AM A BETTER WOMAN BECAUSE OF IT!!! I LOVE YOU AND 1ST. LADY LISA, THANK YOU BOTH SO MUCH FOR SHARING GOD'S LOVE AND CARE FOR US!!!💛
😇😇😇
Thank you for your prayer of encouragement, yes, bullies are everywhere clothed as normal personalities; however, sick psychologically with narcissistic mindsets. Thank God for Jesus, who teaches us differently and encourages us to exhibit the Fruits of the Spirit recognizing that, these personalities are damaged psychologically and spiritually.
I'm in My kitchen in Grand Rapids, Mi cleaning collard greens at 2am just thanking God for Lisa and Pastor RCBLAKES! We are only 1 month into this year and I feel I have come so far since I oops upon your site! Man what a blessing you have been in such a short time.
I just love your teachings. Met you last year on TH-cam and I have never stopped watching
In the words of Maya Angelou when a person shows you who they are 'BELIEVE" them ........
Wooooow! I am so happy that we are having these conversations from a biblical and logical point of view!
Pastor please do a teaching on how to RESPOND to such people. Thank you so much!
Anna Randa Yes please. Especially in the church environment. I’ve dealt with more toxic manipulative people at church than the world. The diabolical part about it is they use scripture and religious mumble jumble to justify their foolishness. When you get upset and defend yourself, they stand back and watch the “devil” at work when it’s them.
No honey, you don't respond to them AT ALL. You just stear clear from them.
@@treatmefavourably9825 how do you steer clear when they seek you out?
They are notorious for gathering other minions to assist them.
Yes!!
@Naomi yes! I've dealt with very judgemental Christians.
It's the trauma that creates the drama in you. You cannot change water into wine...Only God can do that. As a man showith in his nature (character), so he is.
Yes, the sad thing is these people are everywhere. I learned in the last 2 years, well that’s not true, I always knew, that my mother js very toxic. She can’t understand why my siblings are the way that they are. She thinks she has nothing to do with why they behave the way they do. I got out from amongst the toxicity and they are all talking about me. Mind you, I don’t live anywhere near them. I mind my own business and the only time I know what’s going on with them is if she tells me. I don’t stick my nose in their business.
Shift this to the people I know (associates). I run from toxic people with the quickness. I will drop you like a hot potato when I see that you are a toxic two-faced gossip. These people will draw you in and then act confused when people distance themselves from them. People with a sense of integrity don’t want to deal with folks like this. Especially if I’m trying to stay spiritually healthy. These people will swear up and down they love the lord but will talk about the preacher like a dog. I’m not going to deal with those demons. I’m taking a flight up out of their life!! I’ll pray for them and wish them well but these people are not good for me and my walk with Christ.
Thank you for the video!
I love walking away(& running when necessary-like Joseph did). Jesus evaded toxic people often. I disconnect(emotionally, conversationally, mentally, spiritually) by all means. I have better things to do with my intellect, creativity, attention, energy & time. I deliberately become boring ! It's a daily process to put on the love of Christ and put off environmental(in every realm) toxins-however they manifest.
....those particular roaches are called water bugs. They corral where there is standing water, filth, and/or certain trees grow. Thank God that you don't have to worry about that anymore. They're in nice neighborhoods, as well as, communities that grow or harvest pecan trees.
Keep that word coming. I share your videos with the members of my Single Parents Ministry and with my non-profit recipients, "It Takes A Village Family Services". I believe in tough love while being empathetic. I hope to have you as a guest speaker in the future in the ATL #Carrollton.
Until then....You have my ear, sir.
Linda Robles Ro-Bless Thank you for letting us know about the big roaches being attracted to Pecan trees (my neighbors as a kid had pecan trees, so now it makes sense why there were flying roaches)...any other trees that you know attract them? As you can see, I am terrified of them. I am thinking about planting stuff, but trying to avoid pests.
God bless!
I don’t have pecan trees but I have a lot of trees around my home and my exterminator told me those flying roaches/ water bugs live in the trees I have. They terrify me too!
Robin F I have a live oak and an alder ...I am starting to get the suspicion they may like them too
This is a wonderful video! But it's SOOOOOO hard to not react when you live with toxic people and narcissists. They will push you and push you and push you. It practically takes nerves of steel to not react. They will lie, gaslight and trick you. They even love to make you feel and look crazy! I'm working on these suggestions, but I've found the best thing is if you have a good support system away from the toxic people. They can give you the strength you need to remain sane. Unfortunately I've lost almost all of my support system (due to people moving away), which is why I've gone back to therapy. May God bless anyone dealing with these types of people and may you find peace and joy, even in the small things.
This video is right on point. In the beginning my Narc ''friend'' hid who she really was and portrayed herself as a decent human being than the signs started to show. She would cut me off and over talk me while I was talking, walk in front of me leaving me behind so she could be in the lead, Give back handed compliments, Would be snide and sarcastic with me. When ii got engaged it really set her off she didn't like when people would tell me my ring was beautiful or asking me about my wedding plans she stared wearing random rings on her ring finger even though she was not engaged all because she is Insecure, Jealous and Envious. Now that I am married her has resulted to stalking me, making up lies about me tried to steal my friends and failed the list goes on. So glad I cut her out of my life. It eats her alive that I am doing good in life and truly happy. She is nothing but a Narcissist'!
Pastor your videos are awsome. I am not Christian but your talk help me so much. Love from Morocco ❤️🇲🇦
You look great Pr Blakes! I like your suit. It is such a lovely color! Thank you for another great commentary with great perspective/ insight on this subject.
Appreciate this information Pastor, Thanks...🙏🙂🙏🙂🙏🙂🙏
Wow! You can not change a rattlesnake by loving him.
Thank you R.C.Blake
May you continue to be blessed.
You gave a very good illustration because as a child I use to watch my bother play with tiny rattlesnakes. They were the size of a worm and still had the poison to kill an adult person.
Thank. U. 4. Yours. Words. Of. Wisdom. Bishop. Blakes.
Thank you God for leading Bishop tio these nany sessions
Thank you Pastor.God heal me from toxic fellow coworkers.
Amen.Thank you for that prayer Sir
Pastor 😩😂 you a mess talkin about dem roaches !!
Yes, so much truth... I just gave a toxic person her walking papers.she took it personally, of course, and even moved to a different table to sit,I can feel her negative energy from across the room,but it's just okay,I feel much better as I am not being drained from her.
Please pray for me and my family. Hurting right now. God bless my sisters and brothers in Christ.
Yes!.. these people are very talented,..gifted,...smooth talkers,... to get you some how to go in a different direction than you originally were heading. Well explained 🙂
I have a few in my family, I dealt with one on a job. Now, other toxic people on my job take it to a new level. Pastor Blake, yes, make you fight and look foolish..But, God will give you wisdom!..
Having power OVER the situation 🙏🏾👀💪🏾
Elijah temporarily forgot who his God is. Jezebel wasn't a regular woman, SHE ruled Israel, not Ahab. The reason Elijah ran is because Jezebel was powerful, extremely cruel, and basically the King.
It was like the King sent a death threat to Elijah and if not for God, she would do it.
That suit looks great on you! Thanks for the video and for all you do. God Bless.
Every time I listen to the word of God, I develop further. I am growing.
Make sense everytime I'm around my husband he just steals my peace joy happiness
That’s not healthy
How much more of your life do you give him. I chose me. You should chose YOU!
This was a blessing, needed this clarity today. Thank you for your faithfulness~
This was my life for 2 yrs and this person tried to get my friends and family against me but in the meantime I was fighting their substance abuse, all I wanted to do was to try and help them. How profound is this, response from them, I have never kneeled to pray. AMEN
Thank you for the prayer to heal the hearts broken by toxic people. You are so right that they are just about everywhere and it's important to guard your heart but be open to positive, loving people God intends for us to have in our lives.
Thank you for always speaking to us Daughters out here💖I'm from San Antonio Tx and I'm now leaving a 5 year emotionally and physically abusive relationship.
Toxic person reveals self
BLOKED 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️🏃🏾♀️