Sexless Innkeeper

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 7K

  • @swoozie
    @swoozie  7 ปีที่แล้ว +3898

    **SPOILER ALERT: There were actually a few more times she stopped by but this vid was getting too long so I cut it out. The worst news about all this is that each morning she pulled the "can I keep these clothes you let me borrow/sleep in?" Moment of silence for all the clothes lost in the struggle

  • @DeckofLies
    @DeckofLies 7 ปีที่แล้ว +12810

    swoozie holds the world record for most girls kissed without smashing

    • @DeckofLies
      @DeckofLies 7 ปีที่แล้ว +610

      Still gets more girls than most who do smash tho

    • @william.giordano
      @william.giordano 7 ปีที่แล้ว +235

      did you just comment on yourself? because that's how you comment on yourself

    • @LichKArthus
      @LichKArthus 7 ปีที่แล้ว +126

      Not That Difficult Drake from Drake and Josh is a close 2nd

    • @rosefrance5685
      @rosefrance5685 7 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Not That Difficult trueee

    • @zamarri7495
      @zamarri7495 7 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I mean it's not that difficult skilld

  • @anais162
    @anais162 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2445

    When swoozie posts, issa holiday.

  • @williamalvarado758
    @williamalvarado758 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1934

    What do you have that Chris Brown doesnt?
    A clean criminal record

    • @kuzma1113
      @kuzma1113 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      lol that's so funny

    • @___Ryan___
      @___Ryan___ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Smh

    • @kittyklawzarts4406
      @kittyklawzarts4406 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Real tattoos, anyone else notice his tattoos always changing... come on, I finally figured out algorithm, this is gaming? I didn't e e. Know I was playing? I just was curious on how to do animations, your are super cute tho. The voices and innocence when u do tha smooches makes me laugh. N quite frankly I need to laugh

    • @kittyklawzarts4406
      @kittyklawzarts4406 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Plus I started to get a addiction type of feeling with his damn sexiness. Just too much honey and talent, n ew dont make me go there. I didn't know these games make me wanna wiggle sum

    • @okemiasmith7177
      @okemiasmith7177 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well actually, I was brought into custody after stealing my neighbor's babies. I am facing 60 years

  • @l3ecomeking846
    @l3ecomeking846 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1704

    bruh, like i wonder does any of the girls he talks about, ever watch his vids and be like, this nigga here is talking about me

    • @miskogiizhigookwe
      @miskogiizhigookwe 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      l3ecome KinG lmfaoooo

    • @gdragon42069
      @gdragon42069 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      l3ecome KinG There are stories alluding to that. Look in his older videos. Hell, there's even a story out there about him and a viewer.

    • @swoozie
      @swoozie  7 ปีที่แล้ว +420

      To give u some insight, about 3 out of 10 of the ppl I talk about in my vids find out it's them but they're usually okay with it for the most part because I put them on blast but not by name and I don't make it too obvious. How it usually goes is the closer I let someone to me, I've noticed they start watching my videos less which is kinda sad

    • @SharvaAnime
      @SharvaAnime 7 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      He has talked about that before. Sometimes he'd go on dates and girls would ask him if he was going to talk about them. Some of them will act crazy for fame & attention. It's like a new form of gold-digger

    • @jahaitian94
      @jahaitian94 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      they know what it is when they sign up....now they got to run it up lmao

  • @deathdealer13cat
    @deathdealer13cat 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1187

    god you could make a TV show with the amount of stories you got bro

    • @ash-bl4xb
      @ash-bl4xb 7 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      deathdealer13cat I WISH THEY FUCKING DID JESUS IS HE GOOD AT STORY TIMES 😍

    • @mayadougall1384
      @mayadougall1384 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Try Jessii Vee XD

    • @gamergeek3081
      @gamergeek3081 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Maya Dougall I love Jessii Vee!

  • @k.adebanjo1194
    @k.adebanjo1194 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4387

    I swear it was daytime when the video started...

    • @smoldemon3952
      @smoldemon3952 7 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      Just realized that...

    • @foreignkeys3980
      @foreignkeys3980 7 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      K. Adebanjo its really logan paul and julia. we all know

    • @samjohnson8597
      @samjohnson8597 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      K. Adebanjo it was

    • @jolo7
      @jolo7 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      K. Adebanjo
      Just realized!

    • @rachellecollin3661
      @rachellecollin3661 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      yay daylights savings!!

  • @jrubye5325
    @jrubye5325 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1598

    "What does Logan have that I don't "
    Me: a dead body

  • @AyoTeoFVR
    @AyoTeoFVR 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3787

    Rolex 🙌🏽 thanks for the love 🔥

    • @swoozie
      @swoozie  7 ปีที่แล้ว +465

      +Ayo & Teo - track is fireeeeeee. Saw y'all dancing to it on a vid and was an insta buy. Actually like that y'all can make a hot track w/o cursing

    • @bloodnessx
      @bloodnessx 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      ago & teo🔥🔥🔥 we so lit right now🎹🎹

    • @christiantamez2022
      @christiantamez2022 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Ayo & Teo y'all watch swoozie that's tight

    • @sekani2273
      @sekani2273 7 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Ayo & Teo yazzz

    • @blueangel6326
      @blueangel6326 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Ayo & Teo I didn't know y'all watched swoozie aye that's tight

  • @giovannisancez3228
    @giovannisancez3228 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4262

    Lets call this guy sWooZie(its not really sWooZie)

  • @Ido_and_dontexist5
    @Ido_and_dontexist5 7 ปีที่แล้ว +627

    4:19
    Girl: can I spend the night.
    Swoozie: Idk girl... Show me the car fax.

  • @EbolaSquirrel
    @EbolaSquirrel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    THAT APARTMENT AND DESK SETUP IS GOLDEN. as a desk enthusiast I appreciate the clear and white mix with a natural mix with the plant there. must be amazing at night

  • @skeptc8
    @skeptc8 6 ปีที่แล้ว +494

    "Can i play with that to-" "NO MY TOY!......GET AWAY!" -sWooZie 2018

    • @smsdamiracle
      @smsdamiracle 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Skepto Girl if you're gonna do something you got to do it right, dawg. This is 2017 swooz

    • @TheVictoriamimi
      @TheVictoriamimi 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Big Black Toy

    • @libertyprime398
      @libertyprime398 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@TheVictoriamimi Police:mam get in the police car

  • @soupyhour93
    @soupyhour93 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3948

    I know it really wasn't logan Paul but some how I'm convinced it was

  • @IridiumTV
    @IridiumTV 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3589

    The real question is.....did you get your clothes back?

    • @benrii_
      @benrii_ 7 ปีที่แล้ว +132

      iRidium
      rumors say that he never saw them again 0.0

    • @superwolf4965
      @superwolf4965 7 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Beril Ly Ella Nooooooooooo

    • @Solwiz
      @Solwiz 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      iRidium iridium watches swoozie!?!? :O

    • @angelapederson4755
      @angelapederson4755 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Dope sick

    • @elli4612
      @elli4612 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      iRidium I am reading this before the vid is done and I'm like ……wat😐

  • @AngryKittens
    @AngryKittens 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1788

    So basically, she's a homeless person.

    • @TheFPSKingsGaming
      @TheFPSKingsGaming 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      Nah a moocher

    • @zatrat5696
      @zatrat5696 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      A LEACH

    • @Hulk2k6
      @Hulk2k6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      A Vampire if you will!

    • @ricardoh87
      @ricardoh87 4 ปีที่แล้ว +88

      a hobo-sexual

    • @muhammedgani334
      @muhammedgani334 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Ricardo Herrera absolutely sent me😂

  • @abovebeyond2191
    @abovebeyond2191 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5440

    if I get lost in the sea of comments remember me

    • @kmasonsos
      @kmasonsos 7 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Micah Sharpley no

    • @RychecksWorld
      @RychecksWorld 7 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      Micah Sharpley YOU WILL NEVER BE LOST

    • @RedShiftJ29
      @RedShiftJ29 7 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Micah Sharpley lmfaoooo you'll never be lost now my child

    • @julianalston120
      @julianalston120 7 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Micah Sharpley you're pinned

    • @bleachbleacher6979
      @bleachbleacher6979 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Micah Sharpley you rose to the top of it

  • @justinperry9771
    @justinperry9771 7 ปีที่แล้ว +799

    "NO MY TOYS GET AWAY"

  • @pokeprime94
    @pokeprime94 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1192

    “What do I have that Logan doesn’t?”
    A conscious

    • @fatimajameel1357
      @fatimajameel1357 6 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      Poke Prime *conscience

    • @zain4019
      @zain4019 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Fatima Jameel lol for 5 months no one corrected them until you xD

    • @donjoel6754
      @donjoel6754 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Poke Prime I'm ded 😂😂😂😂

    • @nchetambaraonye4554
      @nchetambaraonye4554 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Poke Prime
      Parody

    • @cermit2376
      @cermit2376 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      A conscious
      A heart
      A brain

  • @srj6963
    @srj6963 5 ปีที่แล้ว +499

    Plot twist:
    He’s actually talking about what he dreams about and he’s just telling us the strories 😂

    • @jdatboi724
      @jdatboi724 5 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      SR J GAMING He’s so good at storytelling I wouldn’t mind if that was the case

    • @Rizzlerfanum12402
      @Rizzlerfanum12402 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Really?

    • @srj6963
      @srj6963 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jdatboi724 same

    • @Nestle245
      @Nestle245 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I think he's telling the truth. He's very sociable and funny, girls naturally love that.

    • @vrexyyzeditz
      @vrexyyzeditz 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Rizzlerfanum12402 Its a plot twist, its just a joke.

  • @acaciawilliams8289
    @acaciawilliams8289 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1855

    Remember when swoozie was "waiting till marriage"

    • @gigifreakingdies
      @gigifreakingdies 7 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      martina max haha those were the days

    • @babyraoseh2227
      @babyraoseh2227 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      T^T

    • @aaliyahbreedlove158
      @aaliyahbreedlove158 7 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      he is,but girls try to use him,he just don't link up like that

    • @keiaillah1
      @keiaillah1 7 ปีที่แล้ว +165

      making out and sex aren't the same

    • @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842
      @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842 7 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      He didn't actually say anything happened, they just kissed and made out for, like, 2 mins

  • @elijahmiller7700
    @elijahmiller7700 7 ปีที่แล้ว +194

    Dear God, thank you. Swoozie has uploaded twice in two weeks. This is a miracle.

  • @xsheeeshx29
    @xsheeeshx29 7 ปีที่แล้ว +974

    I've been watching swoozie for years and I can honestly say he's still one of the best youtubers out there hands down. #swooziesqaud

    • @aplacewithnoname5512
      @aplacewithnoname5512 7 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I'm glad his content hasn't been dried up by fame like a lot of the other TH-camrs have

    • @alicloverz5644
      @alicloverz5644 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Slim Stick what like danTDM

    • @aplacewithnoname5512
      @aplacewithnoname5512 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I don't know anything about danTDM, but when I made my comment I had plenty of TH-camrs in mind and Superwoman was the first.

    • @cristo6214
      @cristo6214 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      AHAHAHAHA DANTDM WTF RO ARE U 9 OMG BROOOOOOOOOOOO AHAHAHAHHAHAHA

    • @alicloverz5644
      @alicloverz5644 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      BPB Galxy Tyler-Kun I used to watch him but he's bad now

  • @WillowFaded
    @WillowFaded 4 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    Let’s give the no smash only kiss award to swozie

  • @jaydenng172
    @jaydenng172 7 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    I like how this vid is so long the vid started at morning and ended at night

  • @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842
    @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1232

    Who was having a How I met your mother flashback?

    • @Fortniteclips-xk7gy
      @Fortniteclips-xk7gy 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Thomas Keane me I've seen every episode of that show at least 12 times

    • @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842
      @eighthlegofthephantomtroup1842 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      OMG, I 12 times! o.0 ahaha

    • @ariannamenin5761
      @ariannamenin5761 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Thomas Keane omg yees i thought i was the only one haha

    • @Scamspam
      @Scamspam 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      The Sexless Innkeeper is a theory/concept made up by the show/Barney, right?

    • @lukemoonwalker8444
      @lukemoonwalker8444 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thomas Keane I'm surprised he never watched the show...

  • @fa5driver
    @fa5driver 7 ปีที่แล้ว +558

    sWooZie:He Just ignores The Toy Till A Friend Comes Over Like Hey Can I play With That Toy? NO MY TOYS GET AWAY!

    • @brickyboi2178
      @brickyboi2178 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      hefty magic What he do wrong? Also,Telling someone to kill them self is really rude. When you do that,they might actually do that. So just stop. Leave him to his own bid-ness

    • @LaLordLeviathan
      @LaLordLeviathan 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hefty magic U can get arrested for telling to kill himself a**hole

    • @LaLordLeviathan
      @LaLordLeviathan 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      *him

    • @rs_jj7078
      @rs_jj7078 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hefty magic I really hope karma gets you back

    • @RAVEKOOKIEJAR
      @RAVEKOOKIEJAR 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      That used to me

  • @leahcoruscate
    @leahcoruscate 4 ปีที่แล้ว +242

    Why does it say this is unavailable on my device when my device is a computer..?

    • @nossta5242
      @nossta5242 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Same on phone wtf

    • @leahcoruscate
      @leahcoruscate 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@nossta5242 I tried to watch another of his videos and got the same error. I hope it resolves soon.

    • @nakeddonaldtrump4641
      @nakeddonaldtrump4641 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yo same thing happening with me, y'all devices with Android? I don't know why but this isn't letting me watch this on my phone, PC, or even my TV. TH-cam doing some fuck shit.

    • @fistablazin
      @fistablazin 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same issue on Android.

    • @nathannix3217
      @nathannix3217 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Look at the description

  • @quokkabearlyfe6281
    @quokkabearlyfe6281 7 ปีที่แล้ว +646

    Am I the only one who pauses the video just to read those 1 second captions he puts up?

    • @morganrhae3476
      @morganrhae3476 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      no I do it to!

    • @scarlettcorbett6719
      @scarlettcorbett6719 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      No ur not alone

    • @jessiem1042
      @jessiem1042 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      QuokkaBearLyfe OMG I LOVE QUOKKAS HRNRHDHDJJDJWJWNSJDJHFNDBWJJQHWOEBXBHEHDHHDGEGGWVWVWDU

    • @dst4537
      @dst4537 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      QuokkaBearLyfe nah I do it like all the time your not alone

    • @blakemsoane2993
      @blakemsoane2993 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No

  • @Christopher0601
    @Christopher0601 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1699

    swoozie seems interested in sex now, which is weird bc he used to always be like "oh i'm saving myself until i'm married"

    • @NerfWarHero1999
      @NerfWarHero1999 7 ปีที่แล้ว +170

      Chris Daniel I guess he's Waring out due to all the girls hitting him up.

    • @SoapMonkeeyy
      @SoapMonkeeyy 7 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      Chris Daniel I was thinking the exact same thing lmao

    • @erikacarranza5187
      @erikacarranza5187 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Chris Daniel I can't stop laughing😂😂

    • @kristinaward2850
      @kristinaward2850 7 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      Chris Daniel Yeah I'm confused about this too

    • @tariro88
      @tariro88 7 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      Which is normal as he ages. I'm sure He still stands by his promise to stay abstinent

  • @profilename3030
    @profilename3030 7 ปีที่แล้ว +768

    Fast forward to nowadays and Swoozie probably regretting using Logan Paul

  • @armedjuice6726
    @armedjuice6726 4 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    sWOOZIE: I hate it when you realize a friend is using you
    Me: relatable too relatable

  • @breeeuglyass4790
    @breeeuglyass4790 7 ปีที่แล้ว +266

    "NO MY TOYS, GET AWAY"

  • @boatboystrackclub6528
    @boatboystrackclub6528 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2217

    I use you for laughs

    • @pvpsouls77
      @pvpsouls77 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Avery Bradley's Son your everywhere lmao

    • @nonsoomezi2404
      @nonsoomezi2404 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      ComplexCorgi Right He is in every genre of video

    • @muhjeed8989
      @muhjeed8989 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

    • @TheDarogn
      @TheDarogn 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Avery Bradley’s Son You watchin KOT4Q and swoozie too? Mate we the same

    • @alexau7990
      @alexau7990 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hi

  • @digglesgiggless
    @digglesgiggless 7 ปีที่แล้ว +187

    Okay but the table glowing in the back is so cool!

  • @z3ke408
    @z3ke408 5 ปีที่แล้ว +279

    What do I have that Chris and Logan don't have ? -A bald head- I'm kidding

    • @lillietracy8737
      @lillietracy8737 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂

    • @ireaper187x2
      @ireaper187x2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Brooooo I said the same thing 😂😂😂

    • @danellboy5757
      @danellboy5757 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      He's got hair, he just shaves it doesn't he?

  • @air5828
    @air5828 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1598

    *_(It's not really sWooZie)_*

    • @jonathanbush6197
      @jonathanbush6197 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Heh it's actually more like sWooZie than sWoozie himself. Yeah. An icon that represents the Platonic essence of sWooZie is more real than a mere temporary physical manifestation thereof.

    • @ASTROTRILOGY
      @ASTROTRILOGY 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ....... ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT

    • @michaelkindelan6237
      @michaelkindelan6237 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It is

    • @heatz_crgo3534
      @heatz_crgo3534 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Mizzli Bizzli lol

    • @twinklingromualdez2083
      @twinklingromualdez2083 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      469 likes ya welcome

  • @Homeboy_Brando
    @Homeboy_Brando 7 ปีที่แล้ว +456

    6:21
    Who else caught that reference? It's the song called
    It's Hard Out Here For A Pimp
    -DJay/Terrence Howard
    from the movie "Hustle & Flow"

    • @mastercheef6743
      @mastercheef6743 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Homeboy_Brando omg stfu u loser

    • @Homeboy_Brando
      @Homeboy_Brando 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      master cheef
      Says the one who has nothing better to do than to call people losers over the internet😂😂

    • @exitzy5655
      @exitzy5655 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      And is called master cheef 😂😂😂😂

    • @partytattooz
      @partytattooz 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      ah, yes! my favorite movie.

    • @olerius1235
      @olerius1235 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      The outro is called rolex

  • @timmyrascal2768
    @timmyrascal2768 7 ปีที่แล้ว +780

    Twas the night before New Year's
    And the weather grew mean
    Twas three in the morning
    And I was stranded in Queens!
    The tavern grew empty
    The gas lights grew dim
    The horse-drawn carriages
    Were all but snowed in
    Last call was approaching
    And my fortunes looked bleak
    Then I turned to my left
    And stifled a shriek!
    She had a peach-fuzz beard
    And weighed sixteen stone
    She gobbled up hot wings
    And swallowed the bones
    I muffled a scream
    And threw up in my mouth
    I asked, "Where do you live?"
    And she said, "One block south."
    I swallowed my pride
    And six shots of Whiskey
    And prayed to the gods
    That she wasn't too frisky
    Back in her cave
    She prepared us a snack
    Neath her mighty hooves
    The floorboards did crack
    But when she returned
    She found a sound sleeper
    And thus she became
    The sexless innkeeper

    • @MsThe1girl
      @MsThe1girl 7 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      Timmy Rascal you my comrade , have devotion i hath never peered upon. Barney would be proud.

    • @lancel0t608
      @lancel0t608 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Bravo my good sir

    • @sludgehammerz
      @sludgehammerz 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      best comment ever

    • @albertsstuffkeyboardlamber1798
      @albertsstuffkeyboardlamber1798 7 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I just love this

    • @carrieharvey1434
      @carrieharvey1434 7 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I was hoping to find HIMYM in the comments...

  • @decorzel_5428
    @decorzel_5428 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    That Innkeeper: "Virginity is cool remain pure."

  • @PieLuver888
    @PieLuver888 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1263

    Logan Paul: This video cured my color blindness

  • @Kameronathan
    @Kameronathan 7 ปีที่แล้ว +239

    When you're too early to a video to read comments that are actually about the video but rather they're all about being early and ironically so is this one.

    • @littlebrain4482
      @littlebrain4482 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      OMG I HATE THAT

    • @Nunnehi1
      @Nunnehi1 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      jwjwjwksjsjejej I am the jibberish man hai wound snjwkajsjwjjsjsjsjsjskwkhigirichfi

  • @r4tzd0ll
    @r4tzd0ll 7 ปีที่แล้ว +246

    Last time I was this early, Phillip Hamilton was still alive

    • @tobyshedd7193
      @tobyshedd7193 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kawaii Alpaca Artist do you mean...

    • @tobyshedd7193
      @tobyshedd7193 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Kawaii Alpaca Artist ALEXANDRR HAMILTON!

    • @r4tzd0ll
      @r4tzd0ll 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Mr. TnT Yes! I didn't think anyone would get the reference! RIP PHILLIP

    • @chloeketola6378
      @chloeketola6378 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hamilton heehee

    • @sumaleep5932
      @sumaleep5932 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      my fuCKING GOD YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT.

  • @deangelocordero2187
    @deangelocordero2187 5 ปีที่แล้ว +234

    Thats what i do for a living.
    2:04

  • @pokeprime94
    @pokeprime94 7 ปีที่แล้ว +306

    Watching this in 2018, I bet he regrets using Logan as his fill in name

  • @tda1816
    @tda1816 7 ปีที่แล้ว +491

    I wonder if this "Julia" girl is watching this🤔

    • @sebw1847
      @sebw1847 7 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      Giovanna Teo only during the night tho

  • @sundayschips
    @sundayschips 7 ปีที่แล้ว +170

    2:04 my favorite part of this video

    • @treeboy3840
      @treeboy3840 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      NO! MY TOYS! GET AWAY

    • @isabellamorell6865
      @isabellamorell6865 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Mine too I laughed sooo hard

    • @Psycholas
      @Psycholas 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      xd i was like that when i was a kid

    • @Psycholas
      @Psycholas 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      was afraid that he would break them or infect them with his dirty hands (idk why)

    • @aaaaaaaaaa9998
      @aaaaaaaaaa9998 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      I died of laughter

  • @LazerPotato7
    @LazerPotato7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    I’m happy you used “Logan Paul” because my name is Logan and I look like the way he was animated

    • @widCr_Kd
      @widCr_Kd 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yay good for you! LuCkY!

    • @NxNova0
      @NxNova0 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      😎

  • @astroartstm6954
    @astroartstm6954 7 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Swoozie. This needs to me an actual series.
    STORYS WITH SWOOZIE

  • @lej234
    @lej234 7 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Every time you tell a story I am reminded why I subscribed. Keep 'em coming man!

  • @holly6131
    @holly6131 7 ปีที่แล้ว +483

    Did he really just sit on that couch from day to night?

    • @prestonnoneya3767
      @prestonnoneya3767 7 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      Holly Bear, No, he probably recorded some, had something to do, came back, recorded.

    • @holly6131
      @holly6131 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The Dankest Of The Memelords hank you

    • @joyce3672
      @joyce3672 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Holly Bear True first it was day then night time that's weird 😐😕

    • @cynthiawolfe6706
      @cynthiawolfe6706 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Holly Bear oh my gosh he did

  • @CatPCgaming
    @CatPCgaming 4 ปีที่แล้ว +254

    "This video is unavailable on this device"
    Excuse me, but WTF

  • @zayftv2004
    @zayftv2004 6 ปีที่แล้ว +450

    Anyone else noticed the background changed it was day than now night

    • @killerqueen2543
      @killerqueen2543 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Master MotionCore whaaaaat I JUST realized that lol

    • @sil_spatafora3886
      @sil_spatafora3886 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      yeah haha LA crazy so it was prolly late. and he prolly messed up a few times lmao

    • @psyctrst7782
      @psyctrst7782 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lmao what i didnt notice that until that

    • @herwisdomcipher
      @herwisdomcipher 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      CrAzY ReDz me lol 😂

    • @y1n_y4ng73
      @y1n_y4ng73 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      OH GOD

  • @ineedmedsk5441
    @ineedmedsk5441 7 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    WHY SWOOZIE IS SO AWESOME ALL THESE AIN'T LOYAL

  • @crunchipscrust
    @crunchipscrust 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1148

    Did I miss something? I thought he was a virgin angel I'm gonna wait till marriage kinda boy? What happened 😅

    • @Andre-md1oh
      @Andre-md1oh 7 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      crunchips0crust have you seen his other vids?

    • @BlackClawsGaming15
      @BlackClawsGaming15 7 ปีที่แล้ว +118

      He is waiting until marriage, at least that's what he told us

    • @bobjackson1869
      @bobjackson1869 7 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      crunchips0crust fame

    • @eleos636
      @eleos636 7 ปีที่แล้ว +221

      He is still waiting till marriage. He still makes out and cuddles with girls tho. I think his disappointment in this story was the fact that he was being used in general.

    • @RecordToDeathToBoredom
      @RecordToDeathToBoredom 7 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      "Sexless innkeeper" is just a title that's meant for the definition Swoozie stated. He NEVER said he was going to have at it. It's just the term that most fits his situation.

  • @geoffdowling1590
    @geoffdowling1590 5 ปีที่แล้ว +88

    I love How I Met Your Mother

  • @patriciatrad277
    @patriciatrad277 7 ปีที่แล้ว +835

    I don't understand... how can somebody use someone like swoozie he's perfect boyfriend material... 😩💗

    • @echoheadwithanxiety6934
      @echoheadwithanxiety6934 7 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      Not everyone thinks that. People have different types so Swoozie might not be her type.

    • @patriciatrad277
      @patriciatrad277 7 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Broken Doge yeah but she doesn't have a reason to use him

    • @whatassignments7433
      @whatassignments7433 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Maybe she doesn't have a place to live and is just house hoping, rent free

    • @2702
      @2702 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      stfu lol..... hes playing with your minds, look through his BS and you can tell hes more difficult that most of the sassy LA bitches he imitates with that gay ass voice. :)

    • @alicia-zx8lh
      @alicia-zx8lh 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Glowing Heart 😂

  • @SurplusMilk
    @SurplusMilk 6 ปีที่แล้ว +82

    Imagine making out with someone and all of a sudden they roll over and say "good night" like asf if yall weren't about to pull off those clothes XDD I'd be like "bittccchhhhhh"

  • @nickia7578
    @nickia7578 7 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    WHADDUP HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER REFERENCE YESSSSSSSSSS 😍😍😍😍😂

  • @Haylex98
    @Haylex98 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Absolutely no one:
    Swoozie: MMM

  • @Rockngurl1kittyluv
    @Rockngurl1kittyluv 7 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    Lmaoooo where do you keep finding these girls????? XD

    • @jtj1128
      @jtj1128 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Kimberly Anna hes part of the Kool Kids Klub

    • @julianadelstein9310
      @julianadelstein9310 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      JTJWarrior Gamz lol wow!

    • @lilsuds8278
      @lilsuds8278 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      JTJWarrior Gamz the kkk?

    • @bobago139
      @bobago139 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      JTJWarrior Gamz if ur going to be racist at least make it funny

    • @jtj1128
      @jtj1128 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jaelyn Lockhart Lmao just a joke. Why do people take everything seriously

  • @marysue5621
    @marysue5621 7 ปีที่แล้ว +225

    Anyone else think if How i Met Your Mother when they saw the title

    • @marysue5621
      @marysue5621 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ?

    • @joelbrown1721
      @joelbrown1721 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm-Flailing Tube Lady first thing lmao

    • @annalisexo8501
      @annalisexo8501 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      yupppp

    • @Liaatriany
      @Liaatriany 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me too 😂

    • @ThatWeebyGamer
      @ThatWeebyGamer 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      that's the only reason I clicked on the video

  • @boxertest
    @boxertest 7 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Seems your reality is awesome and lame at the same time, it balances itself out well LOL

  • @lilrival1189
    @lilrival1189 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    "so hard out here for a pimp"
    That is something I 100% agree with

  • @notxsnowie
    @notxsnowie 7 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Song for his Outro:
    Ayo and Teo - Rolex (Lyrics)
    Welcome sWooZie.

  • @dr.wolfie3006
    @dr.wolfie3006 7 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    I love how u change the animation 😄

    • @swoozie
      @swoozie  7 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Glad you like it man. I'm rotating through different styles making the rounds :)

    • @dogoakuna7882
      @dogoakuna7882 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      sWooZie Like it

    • @quintus1553
      @quintus1553 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      sWooZie vgi

    • @stinklordbonk8253
      @stinklordbonk8253 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      DR . WOLFIE yep same

  • @areallifecartoon777
    @areallifecartoon777 7 ปีที่แล้ว +553

    I wish Jaiden animations and the odd ones out and Swoozie would make a video if you guys think the same can we get 200 likes

    • @aidanking5398
      @aidanking5398 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      mr. Turtles 139 probably not

    • @ratwoman248
      @ratwoman248 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      mr. Turtles 139 198 REEEEEEEEE

    • @whynotbrosay
      @whynotbrosay 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      mr. Turtles 139 he's done some with Alex Clark

    • @animemovies3950
      @animemovies3950 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      mr. Turtles 139 nO

    • @brandonjung3087
      @brandonjung3087 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      mr. Turtles 139 get domics in there too

  • @SpiderXtra7
    @SpiderXtra7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    This man has so much life experience that can climb the the tallest tower in the world

  • @4ortKnox
    @4ortKnox 7 ปีที่แล้ว +231

    GUYS WHAT IF TH-cam RED MADE SWOOZIES FTW AN ACTUAL SERIES??? COULD YOU IMAGINE THAT?😃 THAT'D BE FANTASTIC🙄

    • @4ortKnox
      @4ortKnox 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      pls tell me if you agree with me👍

    • @chanteelliott2142
      @chanteelliott2142 7 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      4ortKnox that would be lit 🔥🔥🔥🔥

    • @7evenb
      @7evenb 7 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      no cause i would have to pay for youtube

    • @Hermiie
      @Hermiie 7 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Why would you want to pay to watch free content??

    • @francodefrance5279
      @francodefrance5279 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      4ortKnox Youd have to pay for it though

  • @skylogan6728
    @skylogan6728 7 ปีที่แล้ว +111

    My name is Logan and I just saw Logan the movie I heard Logan a lot, now I am hearing Logan but at least I am friends with Julia Kelly and all over the snaps

    • @skylogan6728
      @skylogan6728 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      *Friend Zone*

    • @dcarterm8371
      @dcarterm8371 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Sky Logan You should date a girl named Logan

    • @prettylittlesparkals1029
      @prettylittlesparkals1029 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sky Logan My names sky!

    • @vRagg.
      @vRagg. 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      you should watch the king baches logan parody :D

    • @curlylocz7622
      @curlylocz7622 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Was Logan good? Seems like a very good movie 😊

  • @CHloE748
    @CHloE748 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    "Hey what's up guys, it's scarce here. So in today's news swoozie has been telling some dirt. You'll never guess what Logan Paul is doing with chantel!"

  • @ipaxphantom7896
    @ipaxphantom7896 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    Hmmmm sounds a lot like that Episode from How I Met Your Mother.

    • @bio_hazard7281
      @bio_hazard7281 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      IpaxPhantom I love how I met your mother

  • @bearwarner4994
    @bearwarner4994 7 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    If it helps, she also picked you because she could tell you weren't a creep about sex. She felt really safe about pulling this deal on you, because you show no predatory signs, apparently.

  • @phyllis9853
    @phyllis9853 7 ปีที่แล้ว +276

    Am I the only one who thinks that every time he Says Logan Paul It is Logan Paul even though I know it is not him

  • @daphnehanson7959
    @daphnehanson7959 7 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    u know wuts freaking me out right now? the fact that 2 minutes ago my parents were downstairs watching a movie, but now, i'm a lone with my room being the only room with the light on

    • @PostBoyMD
      @PostBoyMD 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Flare-Animations ??? Okay........?

  • @Arn01d
    @Arn01d 7 ปีที่แล้ว +101

    Swoozie what is your job? Like, does TH-cam just keep you going?
    Edit: Thanks for the info guys, forgot he was a professional gamer, and I had no idea about his L.A. projects

    • @kelvinnana205
      @kelvinnana205 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Jay Arnold I remember he's got a second job too

    • @Thelightalchemist64
      @Thelightalchemist64 7 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Jay Arnold Two things; His TH-cam career, and he's a member of the Creative Artists Agency in LA

    • @WhiteCharisma
      @WhiteCharisma 7 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Jay Arnold his rise to fame was being a pro gamer mostly in the fighting game community. Been following for nearly 10 years now lmao.... it's awesome to see where he has gotten! If you are super OG you'll remember he met Michelle Phan the makeup guru during her rise to fame and that's how his channel exploded. They had a collab channel called "Press Start" for a while together :)

    • @user-ej7we6ph3l
      @user-ej7we6ph3l 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lmao do you even know how much he gets through TH-cam? It's insane. He doesn't need a second job.

  • @eric2ill4u
    @eric2ill4u 7 ปีที่แล้ว +217

    Is that a golden handcuff bracelet?

    • @swoozie
      @swoozie  7 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      wow. Amazing eye! Yes it is. I'll link it in the description!

    • @LordMiller98
      @LordMiller98 7 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      sWooZie swoozie responds....

    • @mdixon0512
      @mdixon0512 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      sWooZie do u live life luxury because your house is AWESOME!!!!

    • @yukiDewsakuraX
      @yukiDewsakuraX 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      :D Heyy Adande*~ Been following you for a couple of years now. Glad you're doing well! ^_^

    • @emimao7787
      @emimao7787 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's $275... NOPE

  • @comixfan22
    @comixfan22 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Swoozie is gonna be the next Dr.Phil I guarantee it

  • @raquelscarborough9615
    @raquelscarborough9615 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    swoozie: that one kid that ignores all their toys but studies it when someone wants it
    me: he's discribing me

  • @Joshua-cl7qi
    @Joshua-cl7qi 7 ปีที่แล้ว +159

    I just realized that the girl who was using him was Alissa Violet!

    • @Joshua-cl7qi
      @Joshua-cl7qi 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It might be Sommerray??

    • @LobsterLawyer
      @LobsterLawyer 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Probably not Sommerrray. He would have mentioned about the booty or her dog if that was the case. That dog goes everywhere with her smh.

    • @ziweili1885
      @ziweili1885 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Joshua A true it is alissa bcoz she just broke up with jake paul and needs a place to stay

    • @joyh.512
      @joyh.512 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Omg you're right

    • @jadakith
      @jadakith 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I don't think it's Alissa. Isn't she staying with Chantel...

  • @halcyonz5306
    @halcyonz5306 7 ปีที่แล้ว +185

    why does he have a hand cuff on his right arm????

  • @Jabcat-ov7ln
    @Jabcat-ov7ln 6 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    You’re telling me, Alex Wassabi, The Family Friendly Guy, said “Sexless Inkeeper” Naaaaaah

    • @mte5039
      @mte5039 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jimin’s Thighs that what I said in my head I’m like damm

  • @thatrando9679
    @thatrando9679 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    He was wondering what he has that these celebrities don't, and I figured it out
    He got that swoozie charm

  • @sukik8234
    @sukik8234 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Swoozie is the OG storytime youtuber

  • @Guchinagi
    @Guchinagi 7 ปีที่แล้ว +96

    Clicked so fast that i forgot to read the title..

  • @theo9743
    @theo9743 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    low-key I absolutely love you Swoozie, please keep up the awesome videos!

  • @allmightygir4865
    @allmightygir4865 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Swoozie bringing some new knowledge into my life fr.

  • @AdrianSanchez-sr2tk
    @AdrianSanchez-sr2tk 7 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Twas the night before New Year's
    And the weather grew mean
    Twas three in the morning
    And I was stranded in Queens!
    The tavern grew empty
    The gas lights grew dim
    The horse-drawn carriages
    Were all but snowed in
    Last call was approaching
    And my fortunes looked bleak
    Then I turned to my left
    And stifled a shriek!
    She had a peach-fuzz beard
    And weighed sixteen stone
    She gobbled up hot wings
    And swallowed the bones
    I muffled a scream
    And threw up in my mouth
    I asked, "Where do you live?"
    And she said, "One block south."
    I swallowed my pride
    And six shots of Whiskey
    And prayed to the gods
    That she wasn't too frisky
    Back in her cave
    She prepared us a snack
    Neath her mighty hooves
    The floorboards did crack
    But when she returned
    She found a sound sleeper
    And thus she became
    The sexless innkeeper
    Ted's versionEdit
    Twas the night before this one
    I had hours to kill
    I sat in the tavern
    Grading parchments with quill
    A busty young lassie
    Flashed me a grin
    Her garb said classy
    But her eyes whispered sin
    She said, "You're a teacher?"
    I said, "Yes, indeed"
    "I must have you!" she moaned
    "I'm turned on by tweed!"
    With haste we did scamper
    To my chamber anon
    We fell to the couch
    And bro, it was on
    I unlaced her bodice
    Our passions grew deeper
    And thus ends the tale
    Of the sexless innkeeper

  • @Legofan1259
    @Legofan1259 7 ปีที่แล้ว +197

    Not gonna lie Im borderlined pissed that he's able to hang out with all these gorgeous girls and im here struggling to hold it together after being dumped and possibly cheated on...

    • @Rationalist101
      @Rationalist101 7 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      He's popular and has things going for him financially.

    • @MagillanicaLouM
      @MagillanicaLouM 7 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      SWNerd97 well I guess the difference is that none of the girls he talks about are fully dedicated relationships. They're all flings that end up going sour somehow. Also being an internet celebrity on top of just being an overall chill dude helps reign in the super gorgeous ones. Connections and alladat.

    • @AKilahVamp
      @AKilahVamp 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      SWNerd97 lol

    • @gigifreakingdies
      @gigifreakingdies 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      SWNerd97 I can't even get a handshake from a boy smh

    • @Scrofrogoly
      @Scrofrogoly 7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Don't worry, I got fucked over and lost money.

  • @emuhlee143
    @emuhlee143 6 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    “Why come....you’re so special?!”

  • @aguy6966
    @aguy6966 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Sexless innkeeper
    TED from HIMYM: 🙃

  • @officialtaykay9571
    @officialtaykay9571 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Bruh I knew you were gonna post this after you posting a vid on Insta/snapchat 😂😂🤘🏽

  • @zackding3338
    @zackding3338 7 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    dude,you just went through all kinds of things in your life.how come do i think you're happy with all the stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol

  • @jeaniejoseph2214
    @jeaniejoseph2214 7 ปีที่แล้ว +220

    Maybe she was homeless

  • @Nero-xq3vn
    @Nero-xq3vn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    i just noticed this man has a handcuff bracelet. Swoozie a mad thug, still got his handcuff since the last he go arrested

  • @purplesquidyman382
    @purplesquidyman382 7 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    Dam swoozie be getting all Dem girls

    • @jaylenwallace95
      @jaylenwallace95 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Purple squidy man being a TH-cam celebrity has it's benefits 😊

    • @Leoo117
      @Leoo117 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      jaylenwallace95, Well, not in this case. The woman actually used him and he ignored the red flags she was showing. It can happen to anyone if they aren't careful.

  • @StevieRay.
    @StevieRay. 7 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    Why does Swoozie always put gullible in all of his video descriptions?

    • @Rationalist101
      @Rationalist101 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      old

    • @nickmo3904
      @nickmo3904 7 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Stevie Ray how the hell did I just fall for that...*facepalm*

    • @Daniel-pv2xc
      @Daniel-pv2xc 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Stevie Ray almost fell for that

    • @TheWipal
      @TheWipal 7 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      i thought "what if he puts gullible to low key tell us all of this is a lie" but then i realized i was had by stevie,rip

    • @woodah33
      @woodah33 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lol had me lookin like "wth is this man talkin about"

  • @squidkid4580
    @squidkid4580 7 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    Swooz, where you get that Skyward Sword Link statue? Please tell me, I want to know

    • @thesmashgod5204
      @thesmashgod5204 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Squidkid 45 BRO,I DIDN'T EVEN SEE THAT!!

  • @heykidswantsomegummyworms9703
    @heykidswantsomegummyworms9703 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    I had a dream where my boi kissed my crush and I woke up mad af at him. I saw him in tech ed and in my head was like tf y u do me like that