My ugly truth about Adderall: My Adderall addiction story and the day I decided to end it.
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 23 พ.ย. 2024
- It is Mental Health Awareness Month and I thought it was so important to share with you all my 6 year addiction to Adderall and ultimately the day I decided to put it to an end. It cripled me. I lost my sense of self. I didn’t know if I could ever function as a high performer ever again. I am well aware that there are people that truly need this drug…I was not one of them. I believe this drug is overprescribed in our society and is handed out like candy which is why there is an Adderall Shortage. It’s highly addictive and I know I’m not the only one who has suffered from Adderall addiction.
I hope my story gives you hope and let’s you know you are not alone. If you are struggling with addiction to Adderall, I want you to know how strong you are. Your struggle is your strength and there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
On your road to recovery, please please please seek professional support and outside support from anyone you can confide in. Getting outside support was so helpful in my journey to becoming Adderall Free. Below are resources I’ve linked from past podcast episodes. I hope this helps. You got this. I believe in you.
DISCLAIMER:
I am not a medical professional or doctor and am not prescribing any medical advice.
ADDERALL PODCASTS:
Apple Podcast:
Deep dive into my Adderall story:
podcasts.apple...
Adderall free and Thriving with Audrey Stimpson:
podcasts.apple...
podcast/id1499420884?i=1000499557141
Adderall free after 17 Years on Medication with Sheeva Rouhanifard:
podcasts.apple...
Spotify:
Deep dive into my Adderall story:
open.spotify.c...
Adderall free and Thriving with Audrey Stimpson:
open.spotify.c...
Adderall free after 17 Years on Medication with Sheeva Rouhanifard:
open.spotify.c...
ALL THE THINGS:
LEARN TO SHUFFLE: www.torinishin...
CHECK ME OUT: beacons.ai/tor...
INSTAGRAM: @torinishino www.instagram....
TIK TOK: @torinishino www.tiktok.com...
WEBSITE: torinishino.com
I could remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with cptsd. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.
I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.
Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I'm so glad they helped you. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source 🙏
YES sure of mycologist Pedroshrooms. Mushrooms literally got me off my feet and turned my whole life around. I am currently a housing manager for a recovery program. I wouldn't have been able to do that shit without psilocybin.
I'm so very happy for you mate, Psilocybin is absolutely amazing, the way it shows you things, the way it teaches you things. I can not believe our world and our people shows less interest about it's helpfulness to humanity. It's love. The mushrooms heals people by showing the truth, it would be so beneficial for so many people, especially politicians and the rich who have lost their way and every other persons out there.
Where do I reach this dude? If possible can I find him on Google
Congrats, Tori!!! I LOVE that you are sharing your story!! I’m 18 month into a life of FREEDOM from a TWENTY YEAR(20 effing years?!?!) adderall addiction. Adderall controlled my entire life and even tho I was prescribed by a doctor…( I never needed it in the first place)… I ran out two weeks early every month.
I plan to start a podcast… I just want someone to start the podcast with.
*BIGGEST HUGS*
I can totally relate .. I kicked my adderall addiction in 2017 and relapsed recently.. I’m on day 3 without it and it sucks .. but I do know that it’s worse to think that you can’t do anything without it . Good for you and it really helps to hear your story .. and know that life can be good without Adderall!
So very honorable to post this. I’m 30 days “sober” no longer abusing my meds. I never wanted to get clean but realized I couldn’t keep burning the candle at both ends anymore. I’m so scared to speak about my journey. Here’s to 30 days and here’s to your recovery as well!
Thanks for sharing your achievement! Did you notice an improvement in your day to day life?
“The reason why you can’t focus on the subject or you can’t get that work done, is because when you’re passionate about something, that passion will fuel your focus and work. But when you’re doing work that you don’t love, that you’re not passionate about, it’s really hard to focus, it’s really hard to give a $@&$ about it. And adderall . . . Makes you feel like a superhero, makes you feel like you can get anything done and do all this work on subjects and things you don’t actually care about. . . Adderall was just artificial passion. It made me feel like I cared about this stuff but I didn’t give a &$@$.”
omg ur the only person i’ve ever heard talk about adderall and eating disorder me too thanks for sharing ur story
Thanks Tori! I overcame addiction 4 years ago. I had to go to treatment. Nothing was worse than being non social and not fun. All that was fun was cleaning the house and ignoring everyone. It was awful. I follow you on instagram and was like whoa I’m not alone. Thanks for this
I’m going through something similar.. never taken other substances so the hook caught me off guard & ohhh my brain wasn’t ready for what came lol. Thank you for sharing, it’s so great to see someone on the other end of this chipper & pretty & healthy & productive enough to decorate and make a cute video 🫶 I’ll get there!!
How are you doing now?
@@jasmine9064 soooooooooo much better! I'm working with a really knowledgeable psychiatrist whose balancing me all out. not perfect, but feels like I have me back :)
Thank you so much for sharing. After 15+yrs on 60mg, I had enough. As you mentioned, there is minimal clinical information. The best source I have found is from courageous youtubers like yourself. Still very little substantial information the length of the withdraw effects. I am 32 days in and I feel like a zombie. I 'm sleeping 10-12 hours a night and still struggle to stay awake until bed time again. I know there is a light at the end, thanks to my fello youtubers (Tori). TY🙏
Proud of you
after 90 days you will feel like a new and better person. just push through.
I am proud of you. I have never
been an addict, but I was right on the edge. I got lucky.
I haven’t watched the vid but I’m awake at 3:39 am cause of this drug. I was without it for 3 years . Then i got back on it thinking it was manageable . I was dead wrong . I wish this drug was harder to obtain
Same here, but I know the solution. If you really wanna cut off the access to addy talk to your doctor and tell him you been abusing it, and whoever you get it from either a friend or dealer be honest with your friend that you wanna stop. If you have a dealer then just straight up tell him to f off or anything to make him not respond anymore. Give yourself 3-5 days to recover. When ever you think about hitting someone up for addy take the money you would spent and put it in your savings. Make a goal to get more steps in a day. Talk to someone make sure you aren’t telling yourself you need it anymore. You got this
It occurred to me today to see if anyone had posted something helpful on this subject. You’re amazing. I’m on 30 mg/day and terrified of how I’ll function without it. I don’t have ADHD but easily managed to convince a doc I needed it. 10 mg in 2018 went to 15 & then to 20 & I’m now at 30. When I fill my prescription, I “treat” myself to an extra 5 to 10 mg/day for 4-5 days & then by the end of the month I’m miserably cutting up pills to make it to the next scrip. It’s sheer insanity. You’ve given me some hope & inspiration today. THANK YOU.
As a recovering addict, I understand and appreciate you journey and commend you on your willingness to share, 👍👍
Thanks and i appreciate this. I only hope my story helps others
Thank you so much for not completely dismissing the meds or the fact that some people actually need these meds. I keep reading about people’s bad experiences with it and it scares me a lot. But honestly, this video was helpful bc I sometimes hate the fact that I’m on meds for ADHD and keep thinking maybe I’m addicted and should quit, but hearing your story makes me realize I’m not addicted to it, I can take breaks and still function unless I’m having a super bad day. I remember being so anxious and regularly depressed and never being able to participate in my hobbies and interests or do my work (which I actually love) when unmedicated. I just have to be super careful with dosage and if I take breaks I slowly increase my dose again and take the absolute lowest dose on days I’m just supposed to have fun and relax or if the meds start feeling too strong because I have a current hyperfixation or am very excited about something and my brain is already getting sufficient dopamine. It does affect my sleep a bit but I’ve noticed exercise helps and with the meds I’m able to actually get out of the house and exercise. For women the effect also fluctuates with your progesteron/estrogen levels during the monthly cycle and it’s important to keep tabs on this. A couple of days after my period I will literally feel high and incredibly anxious off my meds unless I take the lowest dose.
after 18 years on it, I stopped taking it a year ago. I wanted to be a better mom for my son. It has been so hard rewiring my brain but I have no regrets. I relate to this so much, especially about finding passion.
The reason it's so easy to get Adderall is because almost anyone can qualify for a diagnosis as 'mild' add/ADHD by the dsm-5 by checking off at least 2 symptoms. Very easy to do if you tell your doctor/psychiatrist you think have ADHD and say you can't concentrate, have a busy mind, etc etc
Thank you for explaining that life is hard at times and yes one can overcome its trials and tribulations!
Of course Dave. I'm going to share more of these vulnerable stories in hopes to help others know they are not alone. :)
@@ToriNishino your story hits home with me , im glad you were able to overcome it . The struggle is real
Tori , I’m very proud of you !
You made this happen and are a better woman for it !!
Aw thank you so much 🫶🏽🫶🏽
thank you, I'm a few months off and it's seriously sooooo hard. thankful I found your video!
Thanks for sharing I just quit taking it about a month ago after being prescribed fifteen years.. yes the pharmacist will even say there are no side effects of not taking it and I’m like uhhh not true lol there is NO INFORMATION on this .. this is so encouraging thank you so much for sharing ❤
Wow congrats on stopping it after all that time. You got this girl!!!!!! It is crazy how there’s no information on the negatives of Adderall but I’m so proud of
You! Rooting for you!
I'm glad you fought that battle and one that battle. My hat goes of to you and respect!!! ❤❤❤❤
Thank you so so much for sharing your beautiful light & story. I needed to hear this! 💜🙏
Awesome video, I can relate to a lot of what you said…I do the same thing, cutting them in half to make it last longer lol. Been on 50 mg adderall or 70 mg Vyvanse for over a decade and it doesn’t even have any positive effects anymore. I’m 42, my body is worn out from working too much and I can’t focus on anything…
Anyway it’s time to quit and get back in shape, thanks for the video 👍
Thank you.
Im just starting the journey.
Did a cold turkey 2 weeks ago.
Still going through it.
I remember this period of time and so proud of you for choosing health and freedom! Love you so much
Love you mom ❤❤❤❤ you were so helpful during this time
Do you have any advice with the withdrawals? I’m struggling so bad I’ve tried to quit so many times. I have nobody. Three little kids and I’m an RN who works 12 hour shifts. Anytime I try to stop I lay in bed with my body aching and crying. No motivation. Not caring if I get fired from my job. Not caring about anything at all. I need help and I don’t know what to do.
Literally been stuck in a monthly cycle of binge where the first week i take 130mg xr, barely sleep and the next 3 weeks im fried.
I also kept taking them for the sole reason that I don’t feel any interest in building my business when I’m off them. I will force myself anyway now
Thank you for sharing this. Currently struggling to quit myself ❤️✨
The nightmare is the tolerance. I take a lot of stimulants and they don’t work anymore. If you stop taking them, you’ll sleep the whole day.
Loved that you talked and opened about this, but I wish you elaborated a bit more on your experience with the negative side of adderall use. I don’t think this part gets talked about enough
Thank you so much for sharing your story Tori! You are really a light in the world and a huge inspiration to me 😊💫 I work in the medical field so your story is also interesting to me from this perspective! While I love your shorts, I’m so excited for more deeper content like this! 💪🏻
Of course Ana. More content like this will be coming out for sure. Although I don't work in the medical field, since I've come out about my story years ago I've gotten so many messages from people who are fully addicted to this drug like I was and it's so sad. While I know it is necessary for some people....It's something that can be easily abused and is overly prescribed in the US and really should be held to a higher standard before being prescribed. Not sure how it is in your country but it really is a crisis in the US.
It’s indeed a problem here as well, what I find worrying is that the age limits for ADHD/ADD drugs are dropping so fast and there are so many teenagers and even children on them now. It’s great that you’re sharing the message and I’m sure you’ve been able to help many people who are struggling. And I appreciate your story too because I’ve always believed that as a medical professional, you do have to possess the neccessary knowledge, but there is so much to be learned from people’s real-life experiences. We can learn some things together for sure. 😊
thank you same kind of story so dependent on it and glad to hear there is life after it and watching this gives me hope I can get through this
My gf just started adderall because she was suffering from fatigue in the afternoons and her doctor said it was untreated adhd. I’m no doctor but I don’t think that was the case because I’ve never seen her show any adhd symptoms. But she started it anyway and she totally turned into a robot with no feelings. Also on top of that we found out she was suffering from PCOS. And the past 3 months have been in insane rollercoaster of emotions. It ranges from “I’m sorry let’s work it out” to.. “why the hell are you still texting me” and I have no idea what the hell to do. I love her to death and we had plans on getting married. The last straw is when I started sending her videos on gluten intolerance and how it affects ADHD and PCOS and she told me to screw right off and we’re done now. I’m leaving her alone but it’s just scary because it seems like this drug just has such a strong hold on her now and there’s nothing I can do. If I never get in touch with her again at least I can remember all the great times we had this past year before all of this came to be.
Tough situation. I went down the stimulate route for fatigue and now an restricted to bed without getting into detail. You can push your body with stimulated to the point where you can’t even lift your head off a pillow. It’s a nightmare
If I could back in time I would cut out my exercise and work load. The fatigue comes first, then it’s all day, then you get bad news at the hospital that you have something major and to get your affairs in order. It’s shocking.
And I’m not saying this could be you guys - but it happens. The nervous system can only take so much and for me it was big stress event that turned everything. Getting really sick and never recovered. Good luck. Be safe!
Adderall is a combination of amphetamine and dextroamphetamine, two central nervous stimulants that improve focus and reduce impulsivity by increasing dopamine and norepinephrine levels in the brain."
Hello , first time here , im currently on 60 mg ir a day for about 13 ish years … i think I’m ready to stop , i never abused the drug , i may have missed my send dosage but never noticed . Recently i purposely chose to skip my second 30mg dosage , i really didn’t notice that i didn’t take it but i ate so much for the 2 days i didn’t take that second dose …. How do i go about it and once I’m off what can i expect ? I got on subs and addy around the same time , it seems like after that i stopped wanting to do things and have fun , i slowly turned into a homebody .. for ten years i was thinking it was the subs but recently I’m starting to think it’ was the addy and not the subs …any comments ?
Thank you so much for sharing, your story is powerful. And you're Beautiful.
I’m doing the same thing. Alone and struggling
Same here. How are you doing?
Hi Tori🤗
You are a great inspiration and a beautiful lady inside and out. Keep being real and don't change for anyone stay safe and keep reaching for the stars. God Bless you😊
Hey Tori, it's good to know that u completely discontinued the adderall, actually adderall is a habit forming and addictive one, it should be used only as a short term acting course. For anxiety there are lot of medications, such as fluxoteine, Zoloft, welbultrin, buspar, amitriptyline, nortriptyline, hydroxyzine, that can help u increase the dopamine the happy hormones. Yes, mental support from family is more important to treat depression and anxiety. Don't feel alone, I'm here to support you as an overseas friend. Good to know about u Tori Nishino
Ahh thank you friend. It’s still insane to me how easily and overly prescribed it is… as with many habit forming and addictive medications.
This is so relatable. You are inspiring af for telling this hard reality of your life. So happy you overcame. i put them thangs down too.. that and alcohol was my poison
Very proud of your victory.
You are blessed.
Thank you Richard.❤
Love this video, and hey, you can totally be your own support system!!
I'm so happy that you quit. Adderall is a very addicting drug. Thanks for sharing I hope this will help others. I love your dancing and your cute little pooch y'all make me smile😊❤😊
I became addicted to crack from 99 to 2000 fortunately I got banged up and used prison as a drug rehab,bear in mind I was still raving so xtc lsd speed coke and crack were used,I came out of prison stoped seeing ppl who dealt with crack plus few friends,i carried on raving till 2010 now I jus smke weed,as tori said with her struggles she gave up her addiction so yh despite help out there if ur strongminded u can beat it
Wow congrats on all that you’ve overcome and been through. I’m sure your story can also help so many people. 🫶🏽
As long as you are happy and healthy
Us in the comments love you.
Keep slaying girl
Aw thanks so much, appreciate YOu!!!
@@ToriNishino no problem
Your pup is the bomb too
If you know, you know. I quit too after 6 years. Similar story. Keep it up, gorgeous ❤
Totally relate to the not finding resources or validation online early on! Kinda helps gaslight ya into staying w it.. So crazy how it’s not more recognized-(or even outright casually denied)-as having any addiction potential, given my experience. Especially w its history 1940sish everyone was taking it, and they banned it BC it was known to be so addictive. Totally disparate narrative now.
CONGRATULATIONS, TORI sleep ing alot better now special shout-out to GARRETT thanks for being there for Tori 😊
Aw thank you John. Garet was definitely instrumental in me quitting
Sorry about misspelling, GARET
How do you do it. I be only been on 10 mg Adderall switching to 20 vyvanse for the past four years but start drinking tea and energy drinks to make it work more- but I cannot function without and didn’t function well before. I do have depression and inattentive add so that makes it harder to figure out- are the meds helping hurting and what is the long term way to keep all the benefits without diminishing returns?
Hi Tori, im seeing your video now…you said that u got to take 180mg day (did you take this in a unique dose)had you have some symptoms of overdose, or feel like fainting, heartatack feelings like? Im having issues on ritalin. Hugs from brazil
Thank you, so helpful!
I’m on 3 without it, I’ve just been using it for my adhd for 2 month but woooah! The was I’m soooo tired, sooo tired… just after 4,5h when it’s going off, I became like drunk tired… Madness. Day 3 being soo down, nothing fun, like feels like life have always been like this bad.. sooo scary!!! I wanna start again, but no… It would be so sick… but woah, how much I got done with it, it helped my adhd paralysis but 100% NOT WORTH IT!
*day 3 without it
@@martinasilver wish u luck
Have a friend that's doing it illegally. He goes into a paranoia and his lasted almost 2 weeks. Took me a while to figure out what he was taken. Then I figured it out and he left it slip what he was taking to another person. It was and still is really stressful to me, because I really care about him.
If it's off the street he's doing meth, not adderall.
they gave me adderall when I was 7. That’s all I knew and I started abusing in college. Once I stopped for a while, I realised I was actually meant for a trade lol
The hardest thing to quit isn’t the euphoria, it’s the high achiever personality and mindset you must give up
Feels hopeless. Keep trying to ween and that doesn’t work! It’s a vicious cycle. I’ve quit everything else smh
I’m struggling . I was in Recovery and clean from heroin for 6 Years. Last November i competed in a bodybuilding competition and used my finances aderall to kill my appetite . Right after the contest i got a script and manipulated the doctor over the next three months to max out my dose at 45 mg day . Of course it wasn’t enough so i started buying it off the street and i continue to do so on top of my script . I’m probably taking 150-300 mg a day everyday . I dunno how to stop and what to do . I have a personal training business where I’m working anywhere from 10 to 14 hours a day. I can’t afford to crash. I’m just lost.
If you're buying it off the street you're eating meth
@@troyblum3447 sometimes yes for sure but sometimes I’m def getting scripts . Literally went with someone to pharmacy to get it and was given it out of the bottle
You are a sweetheart and good person , thank you
Thank you for this. 🙏🏻
Yea see I’ve been doing 75mg daily not prescribed just addicted like hell to it.
Same here, 75mg a day and the addiction is insane…
@@timmytwotone65same here, let’s stop
Never try methamphetamine it’s way stronger and way cheaper. I had a problem with it because I was self medicating my undiagnosed adhd and now I got diagnosed and I take adderall and it’s way safer and helps me stay sober from everything else
@@timmytwotone65^
I use elvanse and i pretty much need it. I am a mess without, always been.
Man if I don’t have my adderall I literally can’t function but I’ve been taking it since I was a kid. I don’t abuse it tho, I still only take 20mg xr daily. But I’m scared to even try to quit because I’m at a higher risk of addiction when I don’t take my medicine. I hope everyone who wishes to quit is able to tho!!
❤❤🙏😁😁 May God be with you! 😁😁
thank you for this video. i really needed to hear this so i don’t go down the same path. this drug has a little too much power. but it’s in the same vein as meth, just veiled by the social acceptance pushed by big pharma
How did you get through functioning during not taking it?
What has helped you so far??
One day at a time Toni. Really on Bon Bon and good people in your life
Why did you disagree with taking it and how do u perform now with adhd
I’m proud of you 😊😊
Thank you 🙏🏽
I. Thought you were not addicted to it?? ❤
Not entirely sure what you mean? But I haven’t taken it in 6 years.
This is what happens when you start it for the wrong reason
That a girl Tori..Lay in there with it..Roll with the punch..Peaple dont realize that they are things wurser than death..?
later!
Lost me at "my truth"
You might want to consider your definition of "taper". Perhaps you got some bad advice.
Hello.😊
Nice dancing dog
As a parent you are the girl I didn't have. Here is a dad hug.🫂
🥹🫶🏽🫶🏽