You added significant value and I can tell you're a genuine and good man. Like you said, look at you, work on yourself, find the one that will be loyal and raise more good quality humans. Thank you brother.
When a women cheats on a man. The reason why men don’t speak out is because ultimately it was the man’s decision to be with that woman. It makes us feel that we have poor judgement and that’s all a man really has is his good judgment. The choice of making the right decision for his future, family, career, everything!!
So true, I agree with you, and to those that struggle with the decision making because of another bad soul just remember everyone isn’t you, like the man said in the video, if you a good dude be that. You were put in that situation for a reason. Don’t let it tear you down, Learn from it, and move forward. Some take minutes, days, weeks, months, years to get over infidelity, some never get over it because they sadly hit the quit button on life, if you can still read this, I hope you never choose that last option. understand that ruminating over the moments will get easier. Become a better you, and a better friend to yourself. I promise the days that you laugh and smile and begin to notice glimpses of happiness without the person you once wanted to be happy with, will make you happier.
@@sagemoonchild333 exactly. It’s embarrassing in the male world amongst each other. A man getting cheated on automatically places him in the “you couldn’t measure up” pool while a woman getting cheated on places her in the “I am a victim looking to survive this abuse”.
Nothing wrong with that you just have to vet her properly first. Can't cast your pearls before swine. Don't change who you are, just find those worthy of what you offer.
I got cheated on and I didn’t tell anybody, never even confronted the person who she cheated with, which was someone close to me. That was painful but I’m happy it happened, what if I got her pregnant, what if I married her. I was hurt then, I’m good now, will never happen again.
Ill take it a step farther and say stop letting women or any person define who you are. A person must do that for themselves but to often people don't take the time to take the time and focus on themselves before they start messing around with a broad. It takes time and life experience to realise this, or just even better seeing types of videos early in life!
They get overshadowed by 92% of the rest of the women, and every body desires to "fit in" with the pack of females (that's acceptance). Men tend to "fit in" more on the physical level than the emotionally vulnerable and damaged.
@@faheemfaquir1024 thank you for the failed attempt and disingenuousness. If you believe what I'm saying is wrong then you are the one that needs the blessings, Faheem.... I'd be willing to bet that you don't even study your own holy scriptures for wisdom
What I've realized about women is you can tell if they respect you from the get-go. You can hop in the sheets with them, but if you see any form of disrespect on their end, don't take it seriously and let them go quickly. If they don't respect you, you will get cheated on.
that intro is real. Women always cry and complain but most guys just keep it to themselves. I think it’s because most men forgive bad behavior and we don’t want the people around us to treat our women different when we bring them around after they violate. I don’t know any men without a HORROR STORY about a woman they loved.
The same things you said go both ways I don’t understand why everybody acting as if it’s some special stuff that only happens in one gender nor do I understand why people keep having to say these things like you did the other folks are are people not using their common sense men and women off protecting each other from their families in France, men and women are not out here just telling everybody was happening to them. Do you have some that do you have some men are not doing anything any special or in women nor are women
Thank you Bro! This dude is not a good example for what men should do in that situation. He toke a major L, and it was all his fault. He should have been ready to leave as soon as he saw those first text, and especially when she legit told him i've been cheating on you. He should have stopped trying there and dipped. Talking about it was a new marriage so he toke that as a sign to try harder. LIKE WHAT! Noooooo, no kids either, bro should have bounced automatically.
@@lch7876 you'de be surprised how many men have "knowingly or unknowingly" its just not talked about. I know a whole lot of dudes married and in relationships have been cheated on and have no clue. It's pass time.this long kept secret come to light
@@greatness2work818 I'm not talking about men who don't know. You can't help what you don't know. But I'm talking about the men who do know, but allow a woman to continue to play with them. Not once, twice, but 3 times like dude above. I can somewhat understand giving a woman that had your kids one chance. But this dude hell no. This guy is a bad example and men need not apply or feel sorry. He new.
As a woman, I often tell people that the hearts and spirits of men get broken too. I am sorry on behalf of great women, for the trashiness of immature amd selfish females. You all deserve the best too.
Wow bro, sorry to hear this. This is very common as someone in medical field. Gastric sleeve surgery is one of the biggest divorce risk factors for this very reason.
This isn't new. I'm glad men are finally sharing their stories. They've held it in for so long because other men would clown them and say "oh you must wasn't hitting it right" or behind you back say you must have a small d. I'm glad you're sharing your story so men can stop feeling less than because of a woman's unscrupulous behavior. Like unscrupulous men, sometimes it's just her character too.
😂 aye. I wasn’t about to leave my own crib and have it happen in my house. I couldn’t control what she did with her time away. But I knew I’d rather have the place to myself. Whether I got the room or not, it would have happened. 🤷🏾♂️
In other words “he didnt make conclusions about the general female population that are true and hurt womens feelings based on his own experiences justaposed with reality” But go on
The content here featuring males is getting better. Ultimately, we need to tell our own stories without someone trying to clown us, so God bless the women that have been on the show, but this stuff is needed more. 💯💯
As I 47 year old man I often tell young guys that the best and worst thing that can happen to you as far as relationships go is to be cheated on early in life. For me it was in my mid 20s. It's strip you of your ego, it immediately humbles you and it makes you drastically reevaluate yourself as a person. Its literally a clean slate. It also allows you to better understand red flags. It teaches you how to better communicate with your future partners. It sucks it really sucks because it will hurt so much in the moment but take it as a learning experience
Women have asked me why men don't talk? We talk, but to each other, and about certain things. Some things we keep to ourselves and we handle it. Men mainly don't talk to women cause women are famous for using what we share against us, and then she shares it with her friends, that's a price men aren't willing to pay for peace and trust
Once you are alone and learn not to base your mental health on needing a partner and your money starts to go up. You see life in a totally different way and your happiness increases based on your personal growth.
From my experience, it's a lot of work and it takes serious individual therapy on both sides. And even then, both of them need to be truly submitted under the same belief system. If God didn't come down himself and say deal with her, all that work isn't worth it. You can't build from broken pieces.
Man this is deep… I just got out a relationship where I was cheated on multiple times over 3 years - ghosted, gaslighted, told it would never happen again, etc. and still tried to make it work but the trust was never there. It’s disappointing bc through all that I tried and expressed my feelings and what not and it still never registered and it was just always behind the 8 ball… and eventually through all that hurt I cheated too, not really as revenge but bc it just seemed like she didn’t understand or like I should just move on and get over it… and I shoulda just moved on instead of trying to stay and navigate the hurt w/ someone who clearly didn’t have the respect and such that I thought was there, which is all on me bc that anger came out in a way that I didn’t want it to get to to where I cheated too… but it’s just like 3+ years of that vs. me cheating in an isolated time frame (couple months), I just shouldn’t have let it get to that point, which I’m accountable for and I was wrong for… you do things when you really care for someone or think someone is truly down for you when it was never that to begin w/ no matter how hard you tried… unfortunate but hindsight is 20/20 I suppose…
The best decision that I've made as month in 49 yr old man..is to channel my energy on me. I'm not ready for anything serious with a woman right now.🤷🏾♂️💯
I’m 34 I remember when this black feminist stuff really kicked in around 2005 with Black Girls Rock on BET, even churches picked up the slogan and a lot of them during that time finally started letting women preach. The movement was supposed to empower women but it turned into women showcasing that they could outperform and compete with black men. This whole movement has damaged the millennials. As a man I distinctly remember narratives being pushed for men to conform more to women’s wants and today things have gone completely left field for the worst!
a woman who is super model or a woman who is a perfect 10 arent all the same. We keep inflating women with beauty to be bad women. I dated down and got the worst treatment from women who werent 7s and under. It doesnt mean all below average women are bad. The key is finding a good woman who is also beautiful, an keep her if she falls madly inlove with you, If she dont love you, dont chase her, replace her. Find a Beautiful Good woman who will love you. An she will treat you right. If a woman is for you, then you wont have work that hard. A woman is for you wont be hard to get. BAD Women = Modern woman, Independant woman, Bad attitude, Cheater, Getto Notice these arent good women, no matter how pretty a woman is, she is never out of your league. A good woman dont care about using men for a lifestyle. she cares about being inlove. If a woman wants to be flown out to dubai by strange men, She is not on your level. You out of her league.
All Facts!! A “BAD” women does low key equate to actually being “bad”. If your self-loathing, self-seeking then you’re solely out for yourself and not for the betterment of your man and for the betterment of you two as a couple.
@@jocelynford4209 the less attractive women usually are the most insecure, attention seeking and mess with the most dudes because they was ugly ducklings. Now guys give them the time of day because certain men simply don't have options so the motto pxssy is pwssy comes into play meaning we need to get sex from who we can she can be a BBW or she can have a nice body and just be ugly. These girls know how they look in the face but men are giving them attention finally so these women gonna cheat on you badly
Its good to see brothers coming together and support each other emotional because a lot of us feel like we're totally alone when we going through things and no one to talk to. I wonder how many male suicides black and white could have been prevented had that guy had someone to talk to or vent to.
This whole conversation solidifies why boys and young men need fathers and or a strong male role model that can give them the game, insight and wisdom on women! I hate to say it but some guys have had a weak male role model/father either he was absent or he acted very simple with women and those negative traits get passed down. On the flip side a lot of young men grow up and go through some of these struggles but now have the wisdom to pass down to there sons. The best advice a man can give to his son is how to deal with eve because she’s everywhere you go and your going to have to learn how to not be simple and bite that fruit.
Interesting. I see a lot of comments from mature men not the men who start of their sentence with “all these women” that usually makes me turn off the video but I watched the entire video and read respectful comments
I feel that modern women want a traditional man while they are not traditional women. The playing field (society) is now viewed as equal. Career, lifestyle, goals, and ability to obtain anything someone may desire; but the roles are reversed. Men use to be able to select the women they wanted and a women would be submissive in order to obtain a certain lifestyle or even seen worthy (a wife) due to how society viewed them. Now women have the choice of the men they select compared to what they already have or ability to obtain. Marriage is an outdated concept for modern society due to people thinking there’s always something newer and better. Today times people care about what looks good to others instead of making what they already have work. Look at it like this. Everyone wants the newest phone or car when their old phone or car was good enough.
I’m not sure if I finished his story when he first posted it but it definitely shook me as a man. When I was younger; a woman cheating on her husband or boyfriend didn’t phase me and my thoughts were, better him then me. The immaturity I possessed stemmed from growing up being praised for handling multiple women at a time. So, in my eyes I was in the right (Caribbean raised for context). Fast forward to me now and focusing on becoming a lawyer and a pillar in my community I have not mentally explored what would happen if a woman I’ve invested time, energy and a family into would step out on the Union Any guy who says he doesn’t think about evolving in his relationship is walking around with the lights off at night in his castle. Your evolution is for you and the relationship. This way if something happens, you are still on the journey and not stagnant. Keep Pushin The Dèsir!
When a woman cheats on you don’t get mad at the dude! God will deal with him and her if it was a marriage. Adultery never works out! But remember that man just did you a massive favor. He helped uncover a disloyal person in your inner circle now move accordingly. And most important be nice and kind on the way out. Wish her the best and be pleasant. That one thing will drive her ass crazy being nice on the way out. The relationship with the new guy will eventually fail and her regret will eat her ass alive!
The piece of game I gave my daughters is to know the type of man they want to be their husband AND the father of their children. Leader and father. Not lover. Ephesians 5 does a better job of that than anything. But a mom who has been a successful wife is the best supplemental instructor.
This was a beautiful interview. The interviewer asked GREAT questions! And the guest had well thought out answers. Phenomenal content from our Black Men ✅👏🏾
This dude still needs some additional understanding of male/female relations. You can be a good dude and not a 'nice guy'. Nice guys get taken advantage of and looked over because they don't know or understand how to put themselves and their standards above those of women. They don't know how to call out the bs when a woman displays bad behavior in order to put boundaries on her. You will get A LOT of push back from women when you put boundaries in place and push back on her s**t tests and you are prepared to move on if she challenges you in the wrong way. The real good men are not 'nice guys', we have boundaries, standards and we inforce them with women without fail. If you falter and go back or acquiece, your weakness will be punished. With regard to being cheated on... I believe that a woman cheats on her man because she no longer respects him. Maybe he's allowing her to call all the shots , not showing the proper amount of leadership, etc. Whatever it is, when it happens the relationship is over. IMO, the number one thing a man should not tolerate in a relationship is any form of disrespect, and a woman cheating on you is the ultimate show of disrespect and the woman knows it. If you take her back after this display of disrespect it's an affermation of her reasoning to disrespect you in that way in the first place.
This guy is also dealing with American women. Generally American women are unfeminine, selfish and have no shame - black American women take all of these things to another level. In other cultures, if a woman acted like this, she'd literally be homeless - even her own family wouldn't take her in. In cultures where women are properly constrained and disciplined, sure, you get a few shit tests here and there - but nothing compared to what you have to deal with with American women. Ulitimately they're not worth it. These women believe they're independent just because they have a job lol. That's not going to sustain them psychologically through life.
As black men were told that a very young age that if we cannot achieve and surpass we will be overlooked by the world. We do twice as much to get half and Society expects us to co-sign.
I appreciate the transparency and everything said in this video tho. It’s times where I blame myself and often feel like I’m not good enough, time wasted and invested that I can’t get back, etc. but everything happens/ed for a reason. Hopefully to see more positive on the other side in my life which I’m sure is there. Thank you again.
Curtis, I'm sorry you are going through this difficult time. Infidelity is extremely painful and unfair. It sounds like you're still sifting through the tons of emotional ups and downs it brings. I hope you are able to have alone time where you allow yourself to mourn which can include crying. Crying is the body's pressure release valve I hope that you are able to find comfort in it. Some have found it helpful to journal about their feelings. As you see your writings over time it can be encouraging to see your progress. Please be assured you are allowed to feel, it doesn't make you less of a man. I am confident that you can and will come out on the other side of this stronger, wiser and capable of a healthy and mutual love. 💕🌼
This is how I look at it whenever it comes to a woman cheating specially black women no matter what you did or you didn't do you're always a villain in their story Women don’t exactly like to self-examine and accept blame for their own failings, so it’s extremely easy to pass the blame on to the person who isn’t there to defend themselves.
I don't know about other women, but I would have a faceoff anytime anywhere with any of my exes who cheated. I'm not blaming; I'm simply stating. I'm not scared to debate any of them. And yes, if you cheat, you are the villain.
What is this whole race thing? Racist nothing to do with it in some women paint demand to be villains and some don’t that’s life sounds like you didn’t pick a woman that knows how to take accountability too bad.
@@downbad2874 oh im sorry you do know this is a predominately black page. If my opinion doesn't align with yours please excuse yourself from the conversation.
🤚🏽🤚🏽🤚🏽 after 23yrs then she wants a divorce, while old friends / her family gathered and consoled her, like I did something wrong... so I just sat a my new place all alone wondering what I did wrong, then I said wait she asked for the divorce not me, now I see my money im taking trips really starting to see things differently now....
Corey!!!! Went to College with him! Such a wonderful guy! Hate that this happened to him ! I’m glad that he broke his silence because we do need to hear both sides of infidelity. Because, I can admit as a woman, we DO cheat!
Very, very good interview 👏🏾...free of "black women" bashing...even the mention of KS was brief, without all the gushing, admitting there was pros and cons to his message...just a deep look into the soul of a man that was in love with his woman, and the aftereffects of her infidelities...very deep, this black woman approves this message 👏🏾😊
Men need to focus on improving ourselves and understanding how this society has conditioned us to evaluate and predicate our value and self worth on standards that do not start from a premise that we are men with limitless potential and that our validation is in no way attached to the perception of us by women. An example of where this mindset requires improvement is when you hear men, when discussing Kevin Samuels, referring to his tone and/or antics impacting women's ability or willingness to accept what he was saying. As a man we are not hearing like or as a woman and so the need to apologize for how a woman hears is out of order.
Suggestion: There needs to be separate lounge for Beginner Relationships Lounge from 18-21yrs old that DO NOT want kids and mandate the use of contraseptics that practice working with another person, Hook Up Situationships Lounge 22-25yrs with no expectations, and a Marriage Lounge 25-29yrs strictly looking for a longer term life long relationship with kids a companied with a prenup. Ladies if you are committed, you enjoy the lifestyle, you will get the house, and life insurance in the end for your dedication so, calm down. Normally anywhere around $500k to $1M so, no need to fight the prenup.
The real equivalent of cheating is when a man emotionally confides within another and has a bond with her… she, your current partner rather you have novelty sex than emotionally connect and confide in another female.
You can be the nicest man on the planet, but when a woman leaves, she is going to make you out to be the bad guy. And I have figured out why. If she has hyped you up to be a good guy, she can’t then turn around and just say she is leaving for no reason or because she found someone else. If she did, people would say “Girl, why are you leaving? He is so good to you.” So they have to go twice as far to make you seem terrible. If not, she will have to take accountability for leaving a good guy.
I think women do NOT confuse interest with attention. We very readily know the difference. Now whether or not she follows that feeling is on her, but we know.
Men have to realize accept women are people too. They have the same whims, feelings, desires as men. Too many dudes think no way a women would do what I do. Nott true. Relationships take focus and open communication. Can't take anything for granted.
its crazy that even when we are wronged betrayed. we are still in a position of protecting her by not talking about it. but then again some might feel no one will listen or care. its either you weren't man enough to please her, suck it up, man up, just move on or you picked her.
Why do we focus on the woman that want to be flown to places and the superfluous nature? There are so many good woman that aren’t high maintenance like that.
Idc how long it takes me, I’d rather be old and wise enough to sniff a cheater before marriage than young n “in love”. Glad he was able to bounce back from the situation. More men need to be vocal about this and spread awareness
28:54 Allen or Corey I need an entire episode on how to vet a woman. What’s the top questions to ask; what’s the cues/signs to look for? How do u properly vet? At what point does the vetting process end? As an African, I can’t tell u how many loyal successful married men with kids have talked about their African wives cheating. Idk if you’ve discussed this in depth but it will be appreciated. What advice do u have about properly vetting for young beginner- intermediate daters interested in a sustainable relationship
Self awareness deserves a big push, knowing what you are capable of and what you will allow does tell you alot. Lotta women do study their men, and likely know him better than he knows himself. If she is a true wife then she can best help him, but if she is not a true wife then likely she'll cause him damages. It's said that women are fickle, and I see the "moves" they make with no real regard to the outcomes that it causes. If She didn't really desire respect from her husband and her male friend, say less. Pitting them against each other, to possibly cancel them both out? No, because her movements were feelings based and his were too and that canceled himself out as the leader when he's following her emotional precedents. Always know that it doesn't matter what you feel, right is right or get left.
I tell ya what, if everybody go back and rewatch the show “EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS” I think CHRIS ROCK displayed a perfect example of what a good black men would look like!!
making a dude wait might not eliminate every dude that just wants to play, but it will eliminate most that are not serious about you. i was not going to put in that kind of effort for a play toy over months and months. not at the attention level that would make a woman feel like finally giving up the cat if she was holding out.
Bro! I paused your video, and went to watch this dudes whole video. Rather people clipped his video, or not. This dude toke a major L, and made me realize how weak men in the west have become. He did literally everything a man should have not done in that situation. Its like he was trying to cover his big a-s-s L, and ignorance by covering the story with sad background music, and mentioning God. I truly hope men don't follow by his example and how he handled this situation. I commend him on keeping a cool head, but his ignorance, and maybe youth made him go through unnecessary pain. Bro as soon as you have proof your woman cheated married or not. Know that its over, and move on. Especially if its a new marriage, and there are no children. I give this dude no props accept for having a cool head, but he was so cool that he was weak. Being calm, doesn't mean be stupid about some kitty.
K.. Samuels was disliked because of what he was saying .. his actual message .. with or without the antics he still would have got the same response .. you can’t correct debate check or converse with American woman (especially black woman) period ..
What he said about providing is not a stretch of a statement. I have been on both ends of it. Having her to tip-toe away from the guys she was with for me because of what I could provide and also not being able to provide as I used to with another and having that woman fall into another man hands. They'll take that walk sooner or later, bet on that. Oilfield changed that for me. Providing has never been an issue for the past 8 years now and I did the picking lol.
Maaaaaaan he just described my entire life. Women be cheating as long as men. The difference is we don't b!tch about it like they do. We deal with it. But most men will not take her back. We might still sleep with you. But at thjs point you just a booty call. Women also have these completely unrealistic ideas of what a man has to bring to the table. They say you need a 6 figure salary. Yet they still bagging groceries. You want him to look like Edris or Denzel. Yet on a scale of 1-10 they barely a 5. It makes no sense.
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It was a pleasure to be featured! Great conversation and dope vibes. 💯✊🏾
You added significant value and I can tell you're a genuine and good man. Like you said, look at you, work on yourself, find the one that will be loyal and raise more good quality humans. Thank you brother.
SALUTE BROTHER 🫡
@@wnttalk And you are one of our soldiers in the fight for reconciliation. May the wind be at your back brother.
@@faheemfaquir1024 Thank you. That’s always the goal ✊🏾✊🏾
@@wnttalk 🫡🫡
Men suffer in silence while women suffer with an audience.
Idk brother I suffered in silence for a long time it’s still stuff. Yall don’t know.
ALL FACTS💯👍🏿
‼
@DoWnBad I feel ya. As a man, we gotta keep it truckin because no one is going to cuddle us and tell us it's gonna be okay.
That part 💯
When a women cheats on a man. The reason why men don’t speak out is because ultimately it was the man’s decision to be with that woman. It makes us feel that we have poor judgement and that’s all a man really has is his good judgment. The choice of making the right decision for his future, family, career, everything!!
So true, I agree with you,
and to those that struggle with the decision making because of another bad soul just remember everyone isn’t you, like the man said in the video, if you a good dude be that. You were put in that situation for a reason. Don’t let it tear you down, Learn from it, and move forward. Some take minutes, days, weeks, months, years to get over infidelity, some never get over it because they sadly hit the quit button on life, if you can still read this, I hope you never choose that last option. understand that ruminating over the moments will get easier. Become a better you, and a better friend to yourself. I promise the days that you laugh and smile and begin to notice glimpses of happiness without the person you once wanted to be happy with, will make you happier.
@@IR_Fuse_Live 🤜🏾🤛🏽 someone gets it
@@IR_Fuse_Live Beautiful words
Not only that.....admitting to being cheated on, is blow to our ego. It makes us look weak among our peers.
@@sagemoonchild333 exactly. It’s embarrassing in the male world amongst each other. A man getting cheated on automatically places him in the “you couldn’t measure up” pool while a woman getting cheated on places her in the “I am a victim looking to survive this abuse”.
I remember tryin to treat women the way I would want a man to treat my mother, until my aunt smacked me on the head and called me stupid 😆
😂😂
Gotta find the right one my boi
Shout out to your Aunty for keeping it real.
@@faheemfaquir1024- No such thing.
Nothing wrong with that you just have to vet her properly first. Can't cast your pearls before swine.
Don't change who you are, just find those worthy of what you offer.
I got cheated on and I didn’t tell anybody, never even confronted the person who she cheated with, which was someone close to me. That was painful but I’m happy it happened, what if I got her pregnant, what if I married her. I was hurt then, I’m good now, will never happen again.
✊🏿✊🏿
Samething happened to me and I handled it the same way... Good job bro 👏🏾
Stop letting these damaged women define us. If you a good dude be a good dude. Ignore the weirdos life will handle them. Focus on good women period
THIS!
Ill take it a step farther and say stop letting women or any person define who you are. A person must do that for themselves but to often people don't take the time to take the time and focus on themselves before they start messing around with a broad. It takes time and life experience to realise this, or just even better seeing types of videos early in life!
Big facts
Learned this late but LEARNED IT big bro!! I tried the "bad boy" or "cold" route and burned out lol. I'm me and proud of it
They get overshadowed by 92% of the rest of the women, and every body desires to "fit in" with the pack of females (that's acceptance). Men tend to "fit in" more on the physical level than the emotionally vulnerable and damaged.
A woman don't cheat for lack of providing or emotional BS there's different reasons why we cheat including simply JUST WANTED TO cheat!
“Peace is not their default.”
Whew 😥 that’s real.
🔥🔥 that’s a word
You provide peace, they nurture it
@@faheemfaquir1024 they don't know how to nurture. They are taught to be transactional bed w3nches.
@@thecodetalker5742 Bless the women in your family's souls.
@@faheemfaquir1024 thank you for the failed attempt and disingenuousness. If you believe what I'm saying is wrong then you are the one that needs the blessings, Faheem.... I'd be willing to bet that you don't even study your own holy scriptures for wisdom
What I've realized about women is you can tell if they respect you from the get-go. You can hop in the sheets with them, but if you see any form of disrespect on their end, don't take it seriously and let them go quickly. If they don't respect you, you will get cheated on.
that intro is real. Women always cry and complain but most guys just keep it to themselves. I think it’s because most men forgive bad behavior and we don’t want the people around us to treat our women different when we bring them around after they violate. I don’t know any men without a HORROR STORY about a woman they loved.
Every guy has witnessed it at least once in their lives
The same things you said go both ways I don’t understand why everybody acting as if it’s some special stuff that only happens in one gender nor do I understand why people keep having to say these things like you did the other folks are are people not using their common sense men and women off protecting each other from their families in France, men and women are not out here just telling everybody was happening to them. Do you have some that do you have some men are not doing anything any special or in women nor are women
Ohhh every man has a story to tell trust and believe. We're aware but we don't talk about it.
@@downbad2874 WTF are talking about, that's literally not what he said re read it again
“it goes both ways” and “men do it too”, gets no play in my ride.
I was cheated on over 10 years ago by a very jealous girlfriend. Make that make sense. I left her immediately, never looked back.
Thank you Bro! This dude is not a good example for what men should do in that situation. He toke a major L, and it was all his fault. He should have been ready to leave as soon as he saw those first text, and especially when she legit told him i've been cheating on you. He should have stopped trying there and dipped. Talking about it was a new marriage so he toke that as a sign to try harder. LIKE WHAT! Noooooo, no kids either, bro should have bounced automatically.
@@lch7876 you'de be surprised how many men have "knowingly or unknowingly" its just not talked about. I know a whole lot of dudes married and in relationships have been cheated on and have no clue. It's pass time.this long kept secret come to light
@@greatness2work818 I'm not talking about men who don't know. You can't help what you don't know. But I'm talking about the men who do know, but allow a woman to continue to play with them. Not once, twice, but 3 times like dude above. I can somewhat understand giving a woman that had your kids one chance. But this dude hell no. This guy is a bad example and men need not apply or feel sorry. He new.
@@lch7876 these women out here cheat just as much if not more than men but play victim. Women just don't get caught as much as men do
@SunniAli Ber same thing happened to me too bro.. Same type of jealous female did the same bro which didn’t make sense..
As a woman, I often tell people that the hearts and spirits of men get broken too. I am sorry on behalf of great women, for the trashiness of immature amd selfish females. You all deserve the best too.
This is female nature though.. Not to be rude or anything but they like dominance and a lot of them love the toxicity..
@@MrMaier3000 the toXSICK ones do. Many are narcissistic also.
@@danimiller3648 I’m a plus size woman and I’m a good one men stopped loving us good black women
For me my ex wife lost her weight, felt she could get better and divorced me.
Wow bro, sorry to hear this. This is very common as someone in medical field. Gastric sleeve surgery is one of the biggest divorce risk factors for this very reason.
She'll get whats coming to her!
What he said was totally correct, When I got cheated on I was ashamed as a man to tell anybody .
Within the first year? Yeah...she was never a "wife" in the first place.
This isn't new. I'm glad men are finally sharing their stories. They've held it in for so long because other men would clown them and say "oh you must wasn't hitting it right" or behind you back say you must have a small d.
I'm glad you're sharing your story so men can stop feeling less than because of a woman's unscrupulous behavior. Like unscrupulous men, sometimes it's just her character too.
Men stay with cheaters A LOT.
I'm glad bro is speaking up.... Women out here acting like they shit don't stank. Lol
I appreciate you telling the story. I gotta say though, as soon as you told her to go get the room for a few days, I knew that was a disaster.
You knew she was gone get lonely 😭
😂 aye. I wasn’t about to leave my own crib and have it happen in my house. I couldn’t control what she did with her time away. But I knew I’d rather have the place to myself. Whether I got the room or not, it would have happened. 🤷🏾♂️
I appreciate how he presented his story without vilifying all women. He shared his experience without letting his trauma skew his impartial judgment.
This is a great reflection.
In other words “he didnt make conclusions about the general female population that are true and hurt womens feelings based on his own experiences justaposed with reality”
But go on
@@eatshityoutube3271 fk that I'm hurtin all their feelings
My grandma told me not to trust “These fast little girls”. She threw around “Jezebels” a lot too 😂
😂😂Big up your grandma 👊 much love my brother 😊
The content here featuring males is getting better. Ultimately, we need to tell our own stories without someone trying to clown us, so God bless the women that have been on the show, but this stuff is needed more. 💯💯
As I 47 year old man I often tell young guys that the best and worst thing that can happen to you as far as relationships go is to be cheated on early in life. For me it was in my mid 20s. It's strip you of your ego, it immediately humbles you and it makes you drastically reevaluate yourself as a person. Its literally a clean slate. It also allows you to better understand red flags. It teaches you how to better communicate with your future partners. It sucks it really sucks because it will hurt so much in the moment but take it as a learning experience
I don’t understand how u figure some of that
Women have asked me why men don't talk? We talk, but to each other, and about certain things. Some things we keep to ourselves and we handle it. Men mainly don't talk to women cause women are famous for using what we share against us, and then she shares it with her friends, that's a price men aren't willing to pay for peace and trust
Once you are alone and learn not to base your mental health on needing a partner and your money starts to go up. You see life in a totally different way and your happiness increases based on your personal growth.
Be a good man not a nice guy
🎯
It happened to me. And she never stop talking to him. KRS II said don’t correct them and don’t argue b/c of their lack of accountability
From my experience, it's a lot of work and it takes serious individual therapy on both sides. And even then, both of them need to be truly submitted under the same belief system. If God didn't come down himself and say deal with her, all that work isn't worth it. You can't build from broken pieces.
Man this is deep… I just got out a relationship where I was cheated on multiple times over 3 years - ghosted, gaslighted, told it would never happen again, etc. and still tried to make it work but the trust was never there. It’s disappointing bc through all that I tried and expressed my feelings and what not and it still never registered and it was just always behind the 8 ball… and eventually through all that hurt I cheated too, not really as revenge but bc it just seemed like she didn’t understand or like I should just move on and get over it… and I shoulda just moved on instead of trying to stay and navigate the hurt w/ someone who clearly didn’t have the respect and such that I thought was there, which is all on me bc that anger came out in a way that I didn’t want it to get to to where I cheated too… but it’s just like 3+ years of that vs. me cheating in an isolated time frame (couple months), I just shouldn’t have let it get to that point, which I’m accountable for and I was wrong for… you do things when you really care for someone or think someone is truly down for you when it was never that to begin w/ no matter how hard you tried… unfortunate but hindsight is 20/20 I suppose…
Gotta find the right one my boi.
@@faheemfaquir1024 Delete this NPC comment bro 😭 Lol... No duuhhh you gotta find the right one. Bro just telling his experience
@@lolivingston6827 NPC... Non player character?
Sometimes it's good to just state the obvious my boi.
@@faheemfaquir1024 Yeah. Like a random GTA character who spit random crap at you when u walk by 🤣
I feel you tho
So much for providing a safe space for men to share. The responses to this man's pain are extremely insensitive...smh
The best decision that I've made as month in 49 yr old man..is to channel my energy on me. I'm not ready for anything serious with a woman right now.🤷🏾♂️💯
I’m 34 I remember when this black feminist stuff really kicked in around 2005 with Black Girls Rock on BET, even churches picked up the slogan and a lot of them during that time finally started letting women preach. The movement was supposed to empower women but it turned into women showcasing that they could outperform and compete with black men. This whole movement has damaged the millennials. As a man I distinctly remember narratives being pushed for men to conform more to women’s wants and today things have gone completely left field for the worst!
Black girl rap was not about feminist. It was about race what’s wrong with you? How did you not know that
@@downbad2874 Ok then why wasn’t it black PEOPLE Rock? Downbad lol
That lets you know it was a bigger hand behind this. I can go deep of things I know firsthand who was behind it . Just not on the internet
@@greatness2work818 facts
@@downbad2874 why are you trying to deny his reality?
a woman who is super model or a woman who is a perfect 10 arent all the same.
We keep inflating women with beauty to be bad women. I dated down and got the worst treatment from women who werent 7s and under. It doesnt mean all below average women are bad.
The key is finding a good woman who is also beautiful, an keep her if she falls madly inlove with you, If she dont love you, dont chase her, replace her.
Find a Beautiful Good woman who will love you. An she will treat you right.
If a woman is for you, then you wont have work that hard.
A woman is for you wont be hard to get.
BAD Women = Modern woman, Independant woman, Bad attitude, Cheater, Getto
Notice these arent good women, no matter how pretty a woman is, she is never out of your league.
A good woman dont care about using men for a lifestyle. she cares about being inlove.
If a woman wants to be flown out to dubai by strange men, She is not on your level. You out of her league.
All Facts!! A “BAD” women does low key equate to actually being “bad”. If your self-loathing, self-seeking then you’re solely out for yourself and not for the betterment of your man and for the betterment of you two as a couple.
@@jocelynford4209 the less attractive women usually are the most insecure, attention seeking and mess with the most dudes because they was ugly ducklings. Now guys give them the time of day because certain men simply don't have options so the motto pxssy is pwssy comes into play meaning we need to get sex from who we can she can be a BBW or she can have a nice body and just be ugly.
These girls know how they look in the face but men are giving them attention finally so these women gonna cheat on you badly
Its good to see brothers coming together and support each other emotional because a lot of us feel like we're totally alone when we going through things and no one to talk to. I wonder how many male suicides black and white could have been prevented had that guy had someone to talk to or vent to.
It's past time this be exposed. It has happened to men way more than talked about. Finally a brotha brave enough to break the ice
This whole conversation solidifies why boys and young men need fathers and or a strong male role model that can give them the game, insight and wisdom on women!
I hate to say it but some guys have had a weak male role model/father either he was absent or he acted very simple with women and those negative traits get passed down. On the flip side a lot of young men grow up and go through some of these struggles but now have the wisdom to pass down to there sons.
The best advice a man can give to his son is how to deal with eve because she’s everywhere you go and your going to have to learn how to not be simple and bite that fruit.
Interesting. I see a lot of comments from mature men not the men who start of their sentence with “all these women” that usually makes me turn off the video but I watched the entire video and read respectful comments
I been thru all of it but only I got cheated on then proposed just to get left!! Listen men focus on your path they(woman) will come
Pookie & Ray-ray: "come thru." Lmao
I feel that modern women want a traditional man while they are not traditional women. The playing field (society) is now viewed as equal. Career, lifestyle, goals, and ability to obtain anything someone may desire; but the roles are reversed. Men use to be able to select the women they wanted and a women would be submissive in order to obtain a certain lifestyle or even seen worthy (a wife) due to how society viewed them. Now women have the choice of the men they select compared to what they already have or ability to obtain. Marriage is an outdated concept for modern society due to people thinking there’s always something newer and better. Today times people care about what looks good to others instead of making what they already have work. Look at it like this. Everyone wants the newest phone or car when their old phone or car was good enough.
Never really been traditional black Americans were told how it goes. Even back in the day the saying is mama's baby and poppas maybe for a reason.
I’m not sure if I finished his story when he first posted it but it definitely shook me as a man.
When I was younger; a woman cheating on her husband or boyfriend didn’t phase me and my thoughts were, better him then me. The immaturity I possessed stemmed from growing up being praised for handling multiple women at a time. So, in my eyes I was in the right (Caribbean raised for context).
Fast forward to me now and focusing on becoming a lawyer and a pillar in my community I have not mentally explored what would happen if a woman I’ve invested time, energy and a family into would step out on the Union
Any guy who says he doesn’t think about evolving in his relationship is walking around with the lights off at night in his castle. Your evolution is for you and the relationship. This way if something happens, you are still on the journey and not stagnant.
Keep Pushin The Dèsir!
When a woman cheats on you don’t get mad at the dude! God will deal with him and her if it was a marriage. Adultery never works out! But remember that man just did you a massive favor. He helped uncover a disloyal person in your inner circle now move accordingly. And most important be nice and kind on the way out. Wish her the best and be pleasant. That one thing will drive her ass crazy being nice on the way out. The relationship with the new guy will eventually fail and her regret will eat her ass alive!
The piece of game I gave my daughters is to know the type of man they want to be their husband AND the father of their children. Leader and father. Not lover.
Ephesians 5 does a better job of that than anything. But a mom who has been a successful wife is the best supplemental instructor.
I’m contemplating doing this too. Thank you for putting this out.
I would love to thank my husbands ex wife for cheating on him. She lost a true gem 💎 and an amazing man.
😂😂❤❤❤ amen to that
This was a beautiful interview. The interviewer asked GREAT questions! And the guest had well thought out answers. Phenomenal content from our Black Men ✅👏🏾
Thank you so much 🙏🏿❤️
Thank you for telling your story. I actually saw it on your TH-cam. Thanks for expressing what many may’ve never known.
I’ll be at work still 😔 Will have to catch the replay. Tough story but glad he is overcoming!
I applaud this brother for being so honest & open about his personal experience ❤
Allen always bringing a new angle to explore and glean from. Appreciate the work! ✊🏾
I can attest brotha. Now I know I'm not alone and this isn't just my situation.
If women have full control over sex, how can it not all be the womans fault when it comes to relationship dynamics?
When another man has your woman heart let her go
Nice guys don't have discernment.
Because of naivety
This dude still needs some additional understanding of male/female relations. You can be a good dude and not a 'nice guy'. Nice guys get taken advantage of and looked over because they don't know or understand how to put themselves and their standards above those of women. They don't know how to call out the bs when a woman displays bad behavior in order to put boundaries on her. You will get A LOT of push back from women when you put boundaries in place and push back on her s**t tests and you are prepared to move on if she challenges you in the wrong way. The real good men are not 'nice guys', we have boundaries, standards and we inforce them with women without fail. If you falter and go back or acquiece, your weakness will be punished.
With regard to being cheated on... I believe that a woman cheats on her man because she no longer respects him. Maybe he's allowing her to call all the shots , not showing the proper amount of leadership, etc. Whatever it is, when it happens the relationship is over. IMO, the number one thing a man should not tolerate in a relationship is any form of disrespect, and a woman cheating on you is the ultimate show of disrespect and the woman knows it. If you take her back after this display of disrespect it's an affermation of her reasoning to disrespect you in that way in the first place.
Yeah but for a lot of us, being a good man but not a nice guy is a process.
This guy is also dealing with American women. Generally American women are unfeminine, selfish and have no shame - black American women take all of these things to another level.
In other cultures, if a woman acted like this, she'd literally be homeless - even her own family wouldn't take her in. In cultures where women are properly constrained and disciplined, sure, you get a few shit tests here and there - but nothing compared to what you have to deal with with American women. Ulitimately they're not worth it.
These women believe they're independent just because they have a job lol. That's not going to sustain them psychologically through life.
This happened to me and I was made out to be the bad guy. Ruin my reputation relationship with my oldest daughter.
As black men were told that a very young age that if we cannot achieve and surpass we will be overlooked by the world. We do twice as much to get half and Society expects us to co-sign.
And we still here, still making moves. Crazy, the spirit is different
Great convo and vulnerablity. We as men need more of these type of convos.
I remember this man’s story. I was just like damn damn damn that’s effed up.
Can’t wait to watch!! Corey is such a dope soul 🫶🏽
🫶🏾
@@CoreyMJones3 get your passport u deserve better🛫
@@albertrobinson4133 the women over there cheat too bro lol. It’s a universal language.
Corey Jones is always one of my favorite creators. I'm glad that this collaboration happened.
I agree 💯!!!
I appreciate the transparency and everything said in this video tho. It’s times where I blame myself and often feel like I’m not good enough, time wasted and invested that I can’t get back, etc. but everything happens/ed for a reason. Hopefully to see more positive on the other side in my life which I’m sure is there. Thank you again.
Curtis, I'm sorry you are going through this difficult time. Infidelity is extremely painful and unfair. It sounds like you're still sifting through the tons of emotional ups and downs it brings.
I hope you are able to have alone time where you allow yourself to mourn which can include crying. Crying is the body's pressure release valve I hope that you are able to find comfort in it.
Some have found it helpful to journal about their feelings. As you see your writings over time it can be encouraging to see your progress. Please be assured you are allowed to feel, it doesn't make you less of a man.
I am confident that you can and will come out on the other side of this stronger, wiser and capable of a healthy and mutual love. 💕🌼
I know the feeling, brother. I felt the EXACT same things. Decade wasted, not feeling man enough, feeling like a failure.
This is how I look at it whenever it comes to a woman cheating specially black women no matter what you did or you didn't do you're always a villain in their story
Women don’t exactly like to self-examine and accept blame for their own failings, so it’s extremely easy to pass the blame on to the person who isn’t there to defend themselves.
“The serpent beguiled me” -Eve
only black women…lol ya are so stupid
I don't know about other women, but I would have a faceoff anytime anywhere with any of my exes who cheated. I'm not blaming; I'm simply stating.
I'm not scared to debate any of them. And yes, if you cheat, you are the villain.
What is this whole race thing? Racist nothing to do with it in some women paint demand to be villains and some don’t that’s life sounds like you didn’t pick a woman that knows how to take accountability too bad.
@@downbad2874 oh im sorry you do know this is a predominately black page. If my opinion doesn't align with yours please excuse yourself from the conversation.
I’m not an Alpha Male, I’m not a Beta Male I’m just a BETTER MALE- Dante Nero
🤚🏽🤚🏽🤚🏽 after 23yrs then she wants a divorce, while old friends / her family gathered and consoled her, like I did something wrong... so I just sat a my new place all alone wondering what I did wrong, then I said wait she asked for the divorce not me, now I see my money im taking trips really starting to see things differently now....
16:45 my issue is women know that it’s hella women doing grimey shit but they still push that narrative that we, as men, are the bad guys
Daaaaamn,you actually PAID for her to cheat?! 🤦🏿♂️ As soon as you kicked her out, you should have known that's what she's gonna do, deezam. 🤦🏿♂️
Corey!!!! Went to College with him! Such a wonderful guy! Hate that this happened to him ! I’m glad that he broke his silence because we do need to hear both sides of infidelity. Because, I can admit as a woman, we DO cheat!
💯
Very, very good interview 👏🏾...free of "black women" bashing...even the mention of KS was brief, without all the gushing, admitting there was pros and cons to his message...just a deep look into the soul of a man that was in love with his woman, and the aftereffects of her infidelities...very deep, this black woman approves this message 👏🏾😊
🙏🏿🙏🏿 Please checkout some of our other content
Men need to focus on improving ourselves and understanding how this society has conditioned us to evaluate and predicate our value and self worth on standards that do not start from a premise that we are men with limitless potential and that our validation is in no way attached to the perception of us by women. An example of where this mindset requires improvement is when you hear men, when discussing Kevin Samuels, referring to his tone and/or antics impacting women's ability or willingness to accept what he was saying. As a man we are not hearing like or as a woman and so the need to apologize for how a woman hears is out of order.
Suggestion: There needs to be separate lounge for Beginner Relationships Lounge from 18-21yrs old that DO NOT want kids and mandate the use of contraseptics that practice working with another person, Hook Up Situationships Lounge 22-25yrs with no expectations, and a Marriage Lounge 25-29yrs strictly looking for a longer term life long relationship with kids a companied with a prenup. Ladies if you are committed, you enjoy the lifestyle, you will get the house, and life insurance in the end for your dedication so, calm down. Normally anywhere around $500k to $1M so, no need to fight the prenup.
The real equivalent of cheating is when a man emotionally confides within another and has a bond with her… she, your current partner rather you have novelty sex than emotionally connect and confide in another female.
You can be the nicest man on the planet, but when a woman leaves, she is going to make you out to be the bad guy. And I have figured out why.
If she has hyped you up to be a good guy, she can’t then turn around and just say she is leaving for no reason or because she found someone else. If she did, people would say “Girl, why are you leaving? He is so good to you.” So they have to go twice as far to make you seem terrible. If not, she will have to take accountability for leaving a good guy.
I think women do NOT confuse interest with attention. We very readily know the difference. Now whether or not she follows that feeling is on her, but we know.
Men have to realize accept women are people too. They have the same whims, feelings, desires as men. Too many dudes think no way a women would do what I do. Nott true. Relationships take focus and open communication. Can't take anything for granted.
A man has the courage to say it others just couldn't
This dude to real...
I’ve always liked Corey. Great interview!!
Glad you enjoyed it!
🫶🏾
its crazy that even when we are wronged betrayed. we are still in a position of protecting her by not talking about it. but then again some might feel no one will listen or care. its either you weren't man enough to please her, suck it up, man up, just move on or you picked her.
Why do we focus on the woman that want to be flown to places and the superfluous nature? There are so many good woman that aren’t high maintenance like that.
Idc how long it takes me, I’d rather be old and wise enough to sniff a cheater before marriage than young n “in love”. Glad he was able to bounce back from the situation. More men need to be vocal about this and spread awareness
Mane a Good Man, dose not always Mean a Nice Man.
Stand on your principles and Keep your respect.
Shoutout to the big homie Corey!!!
✊🏾✊🏾
GOMAB Corey, I see you out here
Keep up the great work!!
Thank you brother ✊🏿
28:54 Allen or Corey I need an entire episode on how to vet a woman. What’s the top questions to ask; what’s the cues/signs to look for? How do u properly vet? At what point does the vetting process end? As an African, I can’t tell u how many loyal successful married men with kids have talked about their African wives cheating. Idk if you’ve discussed this in depth but it will be appreciated. What advice do u have about properly vetting for young beginner- intermediate daters interested in a sustainable relationship
Men love their women wholeheartedly for themselves, not what they do.
Cheating is extremely exhausting….
Self awareness deserves a big push, knowing what you are capable of and what you will allow does tell you alot. Lotta women do study their men, and likely know him better than he knows himself. If she is a true wife then she can best help him, but if she is not a true wife then likely she'll cause him damages.
It's said that women are fickle, and I see the "moves" they make with no real regard to the outcomes that it causes. If She didn't really desire respect from her husband and her male friend, say less. Pitting them against each other, to possibly cancel them both out? No, because her movements were feelings based and his were too and that canceled himself out as the leader when he's following her emotional precedents. Always know that it doesn't matter what you feel, right is right or get left.
That's stupid. The first mothers sent their ADHD male boys out to go build shit for momma.
I tell ya what, if everybody go back and rewatch the show “EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS” I think CHRIS ROCK displayed a perfect example of what a good black men would look like!!
You mean Chris’ father Julius
making a dude wait might not eliminate every dude that just wants to play, but it will eliminate most that are not serious about you. i was not going to put in that kind of effort for a play toy over months and months. not at the attention level that would make a woman feel like finally giving up the cat if she was holding out.
Bro! I paused your video, and went to watch this dudes whole video. Rather people clipped his video, or not. This dude toke a major L, and made me realize how weak men in the west have become. He did literally everything a man should have not done in that situation. Its like he was trying to cover his big a-s-s L, and ignorance by covering the story with sad background music, and mentioning God. I truly hope men don't follow by his example and how he handled this situation. I commend him on keeping a cool head, but his ignorance, and maybe youth made him go through unnecessary pain. Bro as soon as you have proof your woman cheated married or not. Know that its over, and move on. Especially if its a new marriage, and there are no children. I give this dude no props accept for having a cool head, but he was so cool that he was weak. Being calm, doesn't mean be stupid about some kitty.
Agreed but it's also not entirely his fault. Western culture castrates men unfortunately.
Yeah, loyalty is dead.
Never existed.
K.. Samuels was disliked because of what he was saying .. his actual message .. with or without the antics he still would have got the same response .. you can’t correct debate check or converse with American woman (especially black woman) period ..
Never take a women back who cheated.
What he said about providing is not a stretch of a statement. I have been on both ends of it. Having her to tip-toe away from the guys she was with for me because of what I could provide and also not being able to provide as I used to with another and having that woman fall into another man hands. They'll take that walk sooner or later, bet on that. Oilfield changed that for me. Providing has never been an issue for the past 8 years now and I did the picking lol.
I dont think nice guys finish last but they just don't always finish first in a race full of competitors.
Great questions and answers!!!
Maaaaaaan he just described my entire life. Women be cheating as long as men. The difference is we don't b!tch about it like they do. We deal with it. But most men will not take her back. We might still sleep with you. But at thjs point you just a booty call. Women also have these completely unrealistic ideas of what a man has to bring to the table. They say you need a 6 figure salary. Yet they still bagging groceries. You want him to look like Edris or Denzel. Yet on a scale of 1-10 they barely a 5. It makes no sense.
I’ll save and watch later couldn’t get past the clip before the intro it’s still messing with me
Great content very thought provoking