All the cool people have ADHD, why wouldn't we want to talk about it. Guys, we can take control of the shame by not being embarrassed by our diagnoses. Jess, thank you, thank you, thank you, for bringing us all this knowledge. You've paved the road, you've made it safer for all of us.
I hate everything, I keep thinking about how my possible actions could have a negative effect and my head is filled with bad stuff, I feel in love and hated it, I am struggling through college but not because it's hard but the people who seem nice but I can see through them that they secretly dislike me. Why does this happen?
@@Lemon_Push emotional dysregulation and rejection sensitivity dysphoria are real things and really hard sometimes. First things first....it's okay. We all struggle! Know you are loved and worth it. Make sure to pause and reflect. Practice mindfulness, you'll be amazed how much it will help. Watch through Jessica's videos...there's several that will really help! If you need, feel free to reach out to me if you need to
@@Ustazgay That would be their choice to make and you can then quit worrying about what they are thinking. My friends knew it before i told them why. LOL
@Niloufar Karimian Taheri It hurts soo bad I know.. Like, you come so far thinking you’re just a failure, then you realize you aren’t you just have a condition, and you tell others, only for them to INVALIDATE to afterwards :(
I don't think people like that are going to understand, but you might reply, well actually I found a reason why I struggle so much with that. And then after that try not to let yourself feel bad by what they said, because it was really not very nice. And it is more important what you think of yourself. Sometimes people are inconsiderate, thoughtless, judgmental, and mean, whether they meant to or not. While it is natural for you to have been hurt by this, especially since you already felt bad about it, it is your choice how you want to think about it afterwards. Cut yourself some slack. Tell yourself I'm doing a good job and I'm getting better and I'm learning new ways to work with things like this. I love me just how I am, and I want to get even better. That is the important part, how you treat yourself and think of yourself. Now take the parts that you don't feel good about, and find some coping mechanisms that make things better. No judgement, just things that work for you. Sometimes it is all about a different style of how to make things work . For example, I doubt you're lazy. Perhaps you are overwhelmed or have trouble getting started. Or maybe you're exhausted. I get overwhelmed, so it's good to think about it in smaller parts, and instead of thinking of the whole thing to think I'll just spend 10 minutes doing this. I also find it helpful to write all the goals on a sheet and then pick the most important ones, because otherwise I'll just want to do something but everything's on my mind. It's also helpful for me to realize it doesn't have to be perfect the first time because I can always change it later. It's also helpful for me to think I'm just going to do three things. Sometimes I have to break the project down into easy pieces. And if I'm feeling depressed sometimes I actually have to do 10 minutes of action and a break or reward and the timer actually helps. You've got this. You were meant to be. You are valuable and you are good just as you are, but you will only get better.
@@Anxiou5Panda it was worth trying to help them understand, but if they still don't, then it's on them and reflects more about them than about you And at that point you should protect yourself by using your opinion about it rather than theirs since they clearly don't get it
It's hard not to hit below the belt after that, so to speak. You let whoever told you this know that they are discriminating against someone with a learning disability. This is serious and if you let it happen they will think it's OK, it's not.
I too cried a lot when I began doing research about ADHD. I spent my whole life mentally beating myself up about certain behaviors and went through so much anguish trying and failing to fix them. The research made me realize I had been punishing a fish for being unable to climb. I never realized the fish had fins instead of feet.
Sara I know exactly how you feel. I used to call myself horrible things every time I messed up before getting my diagnosis and learning what ADHD actually does to a person. Even though I still struggle with a lot of the same problems, I have learned to forgive myself a lot easier as well.
Me too. I didn't expect to be so emotional but I remember sitting in the drs office sobbing when I first got my diagnosis. It was both tremendous relief ("there's nothing wrong with me") and a sense of sadness for all the self-blame and guilt I'd held on too. It's been such a crazy journey but I'm now at a place where I've (mostly!) Stopped beating myself up for mistakes and I'm comfortable with who I am. Hugs to you all.
With the coats, I guess I have to be thankful that we got designated places to hang them in primary school. It wasn't even ADHD proofing the school, it was simply to make organization easier on them. In this way, I never lost my coat as far as I can remember. I just was more inclined to forget things with me or where I put them in my room...
I feel this so much, at 19 I've been diagnosed with autism, ADHD, and GAD. I always thought I was just a forgetful and fidgety geek mildly incompatible with life.
@@navyblue9355 For me, they diagnosed the ADHD, but missed the Autism. I understand in retrospect though, it's probably one of the most tricky comorbidities to catch.
I'm a teacher and I actively talk about my ADHD to show my students that it's not supposed to be a taboo and it's just a normal part of life. Also, I want them to see that you can be successful and have a working life with a neurodivergent brain.
@Drecon84 In doing what you are doing by representing, you are also setting those little brains a great example to seeing the beauty of differences. They will be more likely to be kind and understanding towards those with mental illnesses, physical handicaps and many other challenges. You are normalizing difference. Hurrah!!
Hey I'm a community college professor and I think ADHD helps me be a better teacher! From one teacher to another, keep up the good work! It's so difficult these days to teach and manage everything with Covid being a thing, but I hope to encourage you to push on. :)
Me too! And I love it whenever I get a new child with ADHD in class and I can act with constructive empathy and not just sympathy. Love telling the parents that I too am in the exclusive club and seeing their faces.
Rick gave me the best advice about overwhelm and procrastination: Do one thing. When i am feeling overwhelmed I hear your voice in my head "Do one thing" and its saving me. Thanks man! Great to see my two favourite brains in one ep , again. Would really like to see an ep on our responses to rejection
Three sticky notes still stuck together. Write one task on each and dont look at second till you do the first. Helps calm the overwhelm. Do one thing now the celebrate the little victories. Yes tearing that top sticky note of IS a lil victory.
"There is a difference between an excuse and an explanation." Thank you. When I was diagnosed I told my boyfriend at the time and whenever I forgot things, lost things, got distracted he took it personally and told me that it was because I didn't care not that I had ADHD. I got so upset every time my ADHD caused me to forget things (example: he said a month or so in the past that he wanted to go biking and was hurt I forgot to bring my bike home after my visit home from the weekend). I felt terrible and convinced myself after he kept telling me over and over that "if I loved him I would do better" that I was just a bad person and after failing to fix my mistakes permanently I knew I was a bad person. I never brought up my adhd as an explanation to him because he saw it as an excuse. We're not together now because he never understood the difference between an explanation and an excuse. To this day I never tell anyone I have ADHD, even my professors when something happens that is because of my ADHD I don't tell them why because I feel such a strong sense of rejection from it and that people will always see it as an "excuse." My parents at first when I told them I thought I had ADHD and then it was confirmed by my psychiatrist even had this idea that I was looking for an excuse and that if I was diagnosed with ADHD that I would use it as an excuse to be lazy. Fortunately they see how much treating my ADHD has improved my life now and don't feel that way anymore, but there's a lot of stigma out there. I feel like if I tell people I have ADHD they'll expect me to be this super-hyper person and not understand what it really is (I have inattention and hyperactivity). I have friends that buy ADHD meds illegally to help studying too. I feel like ADHD isn't really seen in the media or society in general as something that can severely hurt your quality of life and even cause depression and anxiety (I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety before ADHD) and instead it's just like "oh yeah some people are super hyper so they take meds to calm down" when it's so much worse and more complicated than that. I hope someday I feel more comfortable talking about my ADHD openly to people and stop beating myself up every time my ADHD symptoms mean I mess up. Your videos have helped me accept this part of myself (:
Madeline Lyons that breaks my heart. Your ex was emotionally abusive. You have rights when it comes to your education and they are legally obligated to accommodate you. You definitely should tell your school! It’s not an excuse. It’s reality. Nobody expects people to apologize for not being able to walk. You have no obligation to apologize for your brain chemistry!
I really relate to your story. I went through something similar with my then best friend. When that friendship ended I started to realize how much it had effected my self esteem and how negative I started to think about myself. It has gotten a lot better since then and I hope it got better for you too! If you ever need someone to talk to who wouldn’t judge or dismiss your ADHD (cause I have it too :). I know how difficult it can be to talk to people who don’t really understand. I struggle with that too. So if you’d ever like to talk, just let me know :)
"I started seeing myself in a different light, because now I was seeing I wasn't someone that for some reason was just terrible at life." Dear God.... thank you. Thank you so much.
Diagnosed in my 50's. I thought I was a renaissance man, bouncing around from one field to the next. Turns out I have adhd. My brain has a non-standard o/s. It's not always clear whether I'm dealing with a feature or a bug.
You know, sometimes I wonder if maybe some of those "Renaissance people" actually had it, and it just so happened that the culture of their time valued some of the fields that symptoms happen to fall into, so they somehow stumbled into fame. 🤔
It doesn't have to be a feature or a bug. It's just different. Running Linux rather than Windows might make things difficult sometimes when you want to interface but it's not specifically bad or good, right?
I started an office job for the first time this September. It turns out it’s PERFECT for me for being on time and working productively. I leave my work at work, so it’s not in my head at home. I aim to be at work at 8 am. But if I’m there at 8:15, 8:308:45 or 9, it’s still fine. I just stay longer. But my motivation to aim for 8 am doesn’t go away, because if I do finally manage to do it, I can go home earlier which I want. And I will always have something to do if I’m earlier. For most things I hate being early because I have nothing to do, I just wait. So now at work my motivation to be early is not going away. I love it ^^
Great video!! My family don't believe it's a real thing. I can't tell them anything about this. I needed help as a kid, but never got taken seriously. I'm 28 now. It has taken 3 years for my diagnosis and I've done it alone. It's so, so hard. Your channel helps a lot. I wish everyone was as open as you. Thanks, Jess and Rick 🕊️🕊️🕊️
I had no idea when I was younger, but now thinking back my earliest sign was failing classes from not paying attention. At first when I looked back at it I thought I was just a lazy kid who didn't want to work, but going back to school as an adult I realize its almost impossible to force yourself to pay attention to something. I was even say to myself in my brain "alright I'm gonna listen and take notes" like I'm trying to use my brain manually but a few minutes later my brain is just gone again, I'm either day dreaming, picking my fingers, shaking my leg and scribbling on paper, etc.
I think about my medication like my glasses too. In fact, when I get to work and start struggling, I check to see which of those two things i've forgotten. They have a similar impact on my productivity.
10:06 If you can't see a specialist, help your doctor by taking a printout of an online screening test result. I've always found it helps. Write down as many of your symptoms as you can.
Honestly it will depend on your doctor. My psychiatrist does not respect online tests. Personally I don’t either, I think that an online test is much more likely to give a false positive than a psychological evaluation.
I hear ya about the messy car!!! The panic attack when someone needs a lift...I just need to do something first...rush off to car and throw things where they can’t be seen 😂
You have to put clean the car on the calendar and set it up as a recurring event. I go to the same thing and I mean to clean the car and I never get out there to do it now that I keep it on the calendar and reserved that calendar day for that purpose it's been clean for three months. I mean it's been cleaned three times over the past three months but that's better than my past. You have to put it on the schedule I shall never remember to do it if you don't like me you'll mean to you mean to do it today you mean to do it in a few minutes but I would suggest reserving the time otherwise something else will get in the way and prevent it
@@ottotater2787 thanks for the tip! Hopefully I’ll have the same success as you. My favorite thing is going through the car wash so the outside is clean at least 😂
Me too! I recognize this in myself and had no idea it might be part of my diagnosis. I also hope they can fix the spelling of ‘sensitive’ in the banner! 😉
I got my official brain diagnosis about a month ago at age 38 and started meds last week. I feel like a fog has lifted. Thank you so much. I am also now a Super Brain on Patreon. I never would have known without this channel. I wish I could give you a big hug. Thanks so much!
2 take aways for me. First that you, Jessica, went from an uninformed stand-up comedian to a well-informed sit-down one. I love that you keep your sense of humor even with all of the seriousness with which you face the challenges of ADHD. ...and second, Jessica, your concise explanation about first doing a brain dump before trying to organize the muddled thoughts rattling around inside. I have sometimes been asked to proof-read and edit someone else's work and find that process to be much easier than creating my own work. So, if I apply the brain dump concept, I will treat my own work as nothing more than jumbled up thoughts in need of a brain dump that I can get outside of my head and then employ my better developed editing skills to create meaning out of the chaos. Also, thanks for the metaphorical arrow pointing to Rick's insights on the topic.
I’m so thankful that you had no shame in taking about your ADHD and making this channel! You’ve been an incredible help to me and so many others. Similar to you, I’ve never been ashamed to acknowledge that I have ADHD, though I do still struggle with the shame of letting myself and others down as a result of my symptoms manifesting. As you know, it’s a work in progress. I just want to thank you for everything you’ve done. Not only have you helped me learn more about myself and shown me that I’m not alone, you’ve been the biggest inspiration for me to start my own TH-cam channel and share my own struggles with ADHD, as well as provide the information I wish I had known 10 years ago. I can’t wait to see your video about rejection sensitive dysphoria!
I just see books about how ADHD is a lie or something whereever I go... even in a specialist bookshop I could only find 1 attempting a neutral approach. ADHD still appears to be quite the controversy here in Germany... at least from my experience.
Thank you so much. You have no idea how your videos helped me with my life . I really cried hard when i saw your video in TEDX i can relate so much . Much love ❤️ from Saudi Arabia
@@lesleyfay7133 Good! It's weird to look back at my past... it's like I don't know who that guy was anymore! Depression is a freaky thing. Ask your main doctor to check your Vitamin D levels. (D2 D3) If they are low that can add to anybody's anxiety and/or stress levels. Vitamin D and B6 control GABA levels. (don't take a GABA supplement though) Start googling!
Every so often, more so the details. Would I leave a note, who would go to the funeral, some crazy unique way to go. It's more of a morbid curiosity than a cry for help though.
I have a post-it taped to my front door that says do you have: Keys, phone, chargers and wallet? If not go back and try again! I need to update it with shoes and blood glucose meter! I don’t like to explain to neighbors that I’m locked out without shoes again. Amazing where I get locked out of without shoes.
Man I am SO glad I found out all the accurate information when I was still a junior in high school. I'm doing concurrent enrollment college classes, and they are crazy hard to focus on/time manage with. I'm actually watching this video because I was having a lot of trouble with writing a paper, and I thought a little break could help. Anyways, what I'm trying to say is that I love having all the resources I do, because if I get started on improving my life now then in a few years it will be great! Or at least I'll be able to find coping strategies for problems easier. Thanks for all you guys do.
I'm back. See, my memory and concentration are bad. I know someone who has a son that has ADHD, and I think it's quite possble she may have it too. My point is that even people who may have it don't even understand it. She and her husband treat their grow son as if they are tough on him he will get into gear and everything will be alright, which you know it doesn't work that way. Many, many, many, people, even therapist just don't get it, but especially the average person. Their thinking is if they can't see it, like a person in a wheelchair, then it's no big deal.
I'd was in a deathly cold sweat & was glued to my seat & couldn't move. I was so terrified I bolted & lost my grip on going back to do College. Have more guts than I had friend. It's just the thought of the duration of how long it lasts for... Can u get someone to help u make up 8 to 10 CUE CARDS for when your mind gets distracted or frozen?
i was 20 when i first read how adhd affected me and man how i cried. i think it was happy crying tho, like finally finding out what's actually going on in you're life.
The scariest thing for me was realizing that I was actually putting playing with my kids off or starting projects with them off.... I felt awful and guilty. I also was very angry and had rage because I kept being over-stimulated by my kids and by my life stressors.. my adhd makes everything so much harder when I'm stressed. Getting on my meds saved my relationship with my kids in very small ways but I can tell they are happier.
I have Bipolar Disorder and taking Lithium for many years.. I was concerned for my boy if he had ADHD, we both visited the specialist, my boy is okay but I got diagnosed with medium-severe ADD.. I didn't agree with the medication.. I've learned to deal with it by myself.. I'm 37 now, and I'm a pulmonologist.. Please never give up, never doubt or judge yourself..
@@robnation2475 May be there is no such thing as a certain diagnosis or do we really need it? Life changes, we change that's certain.. And ADHD is somehow better than Bipolar Disorder :) Wish you a great day..
Its really cool for me to see these two together. It was Rick Green's channel "Totally ADD" That really helped me start to put the pieces together about me and ADD. I found out that I was diagnosed as a child way back in the 70's but I wasn't severe enough to warrant medication. They wanted a kid in grade school to start drinking coffee....So I went to the cafeteria during class and got a cup of coffee, with cream and sugar and came back to class. Nothing weird about that right??? So to this day I can't stand the taste of coffee and I can only remember having the one cup that day. I didn't fully understand everything that was happening and my parents didn't keep up with the latest info or treatments. So I recognized RIck from the Red Green show I used to watch on PBS after Dr. Who. It was the second time I came across his channel (the first was a few years prior but didn't lead to me doing anything) that more of the pieces came together and more of my life was falling apart. So I went to see a doctor, which led to getting my meds which have been the life saver. I then came across Jessica's channel which helped with all kinds of other stuff in my life. Jessica's videos were also free to watch on youtube which also helped. So I was excited to see Rick and Jessica appear in the same vid answering questions about ADHD. So thanks guys for doing what you do.
Thank you Jess and Rick! I remember watching Rick’s television show 17 years ago when I was still trying to fake it “to be good enough, normal”. There was nothing in my world that even remotely spoke to ADHD as being valid or real or something that was wrong with me. Or, more succinctly - what was right with me. And just when I first was formally tested and diagnosed, Jess - I found your channel. To have you two together today as I’ve come through a three-year battle of serious comorbidities produced by generic meds and a non-responsive general practitioner’s office staff - I’m just so grateful for the both of you. So thank you again, I will continually tune in - as I remember to! I’m going to list it as a tool to regularly I can refer to on a Master List. There are times (weeks, months) when I don’t even remember why I am suffering is neglected ADHD and that I can stop the spinning at any time. Love to you both! 😘
I want to thank you both for you channels. I've struggled with a lot things in life but never knew why. I was diagnosed about a year a ago when my son was flagged, I saw a lot of things they were looking for in myself so asked my doctor to refer me, so he did without any issue or 2nd guessing me (I have a great doctor). When I was told I had ADHD I didn't really know what to do with that information and didn't get any support from the specialist about strategies or exploring to see if I had other symptoms I didn't know were ADHD. I was given meds based on the initial reason I thought I had ADHD (poor focus, poor concentration, poor memory, poor organisation) and yes it helped those aspects. I then struggled more with other symptoms with a false sense of "cured". It's through your channels I've learned about ADHD, what symptoms I have & help with managing them. Because of you both so many people are in a better place and better equipment to manage their symptoms.
I'm 30, after years and years of trying, getting in my own way, making excuses and running into therapists and psychiatrists who just didn't believe me, i FINALLY got a prescription for my very first ADHD Med. Its sitting on my kitchen counter and now I'm terrified to start. I'm currently fighting a cold so I'm going to wait until I'm over this to start my new med but I've been what if-ing this to death since i got it from the pharmacy yesterday. Ugh, why am i like this?? Lol
Thank you for answering question 10! And thanks to the person who asked! I don’t have insurance and getting to mental health clinics is challenging for me. A family member suggested I research ADHD and I cried because it described so many things I’ve been dealing with for as long as I can remember. I found this channel and it’s been so helpful for me. When I can get on track, it’s been some of the best and most productive I’ve ever been. And I’m getting better at recognizing my patterns that throw me off balance. I want to get a formal diagnosis to have the ability to explore medication as an aide. But, I’m learning how to take care of my brain in a different way, formal diagnosis or not.
I'm happy to see you guys doing a video together. Unity is strength. Ever since I was diagnosed add and aspergers certain people realize that I'm not doing it on purpose to forget or to not understand certain things and it feels like life is less of a burden in these situations. Getting help to understand myself and finding solutions to my struggles is very helpful. There is still a lot to learn yet what I have learned has reduced my anxiety levels in certain situations.
Thank you, both! I just got diagnosed a couple of months ago (at 43) and I’m so thankful for both of your channels and all of the information you have shared! I’ve learned so much already! And I love the humor! :)
Sometimes rather than saying "sorry" you can say, "Thank You." Thank you for waiting for me. Or Thank You for your patience. Thank you for working with me on that.
You are a hero Jessica. Thank you so much for continuing the channel. I truly appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. I know that you will find your final, comfortable and happy truth xoxo, and thank you for helping me along the way towards finding mine. xo
I love the term ‘donating to the world’. Saying i have donated alot of scarfs feels so much better. Maybe i have actually helped people who need scarfs😂
I'm very certain that I had ADHD, I've realised it for over a year now. But I haven't got a diagnosis yet. I feel so frustrated with battling the thoughts telling me that I'm only lazy, or making it up. I don't have an outlet or a specialist to talk about it right now. I'm so grateful to you for reminding me that I can still start to take control of my life without a diagnosis. This is huge. Big Hearts.
Thank you Jessica ❤️ Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria? Is this is where "people pleaser" comes from? I stopped being one but, of course, at a great cost. I'm down to 1 friend. Still rolling 💪 Didn't even there was a name for it. I thought it was just a personality trait.
Thanks for bullet journals, this one tip has changed (some) of my life! I am now on 1 year and 6 months of bujoing, and it’s the only organisational thing I’ve ever kept up with, it goes with me everywhere, it holds my whole life and mind, and therapeutic stuff, and a dream journal, it’s become everything to me, and it’s all thanks to your video! Thanks!
I've found it hard to get a diagnosis. My GP would rather a psychiatrist make the diagnosis. They're expensivd. So in the absence of a prescription for meds, I've been trying the amino acid Tyrosine. Our brains use Tyrosine (amongst other things) to make dopamine and as I understand it ADHD is a dopamine deficit issue as well as a 'wiring' problem. The Tyrosine makes a difference, especially when I haven't slept. Jessica, your channel has given me so much insight into my plight in life. Thank you.
Hi Jessica! I'm from Australia and love your videos! I was diagnosed at 48 and watching your videos has let me gain some valuable tools. My daughter is diagnosed ADHD but I struggle with my ex-wife whom doubts the diagnosis due to the stigma surrounding ADHD. Also her parents are the type that when one "expert" says no, then there is no other explanation! Grrr! I now tell people I am ADHD and to expect anything! In a good way!
What a pair of ADHD ambassadors... these guys have done so much for our cause and effected our ability to not feel so alone. Not feeling like we’re broken and not feeling we are failing at normal... to quote Russ (club ADHD) “we are the new normal”🔥
The thought of hiding the fact that I had ADHD once I was finally diagnosed never really occurred to me. Unfortunately, I understand now why people do it on a professional level now though. I lose things like it's my job and I forget sometimes the most important basic things! 🤦♂️🤷♂️🤣 I kind of like how I keep my own life interesting and exciting...lol
I appreciated Jessica's honesty about the stand up comedy. There is another comedian who is quite a star now who I saw before they became mega and they've not acknowledged it yet. Thank you. Great colab. :)
Pure Gold & Completely Safe is how I feel watching this, Jessica. The frustration of being ADHD has taken a toll on my emotions and sometimes my self esteem. Videos like this reassure me and my whole friggin' soul that I'm actually quite an amazing and interesting person. Not better than others but different and exciting. Thank you for giving me strength Jessica. Sending a Bro Hug from Niagara Falls Canada Dan-0
I wish I could get access to a specialist in ADHD. I brought all the self-reporting stuff, as well as the actual page from the DSM, and I was completely dismissed by the two psychiatrists. “Well, you’re an adult woman, so, you can’t really have ADHD.” 🙄
Rune Mist34 this is my fear. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist in January and I know from an article she contributed in that she considers ADHD to be diagnosed and even said to me that maybe I don’t want to go with her. I’m hoping if I bring back up information it’ll help but I’m genuinely concerned that she won’t give me the diagnosis, which means I can’t get the help available at my school.
That's ridiculous, ignorant, and misunderstood that they think an adult can't have ADD.... it just presents differently in adults, and in women, and with everyone. .
It has only been a month in and I entirely regret ever going into nursing school. As a 20 y/o LPN student with ADHD w/medication, that has zero accommodations despite presenting them to the school, it is absolutely terrible. I can do research from all over the map and take online classes from Stanford and Harvard online. Yet, when you are being graded on a school structure not made for your brain, it crumbles you in every way humanly possible. I averaged 99% in precalc 11 and the year before 60% cause I was not on meds and could not retain focus, the following year I had accommodation w/meds. It's not easy when those around you in an academic environment, especially that of a profession you once were so joyous to go into, belittle you and tell you "not to label yourself as ADHD" when requesting accommodation services (which cost $2000 CAD). We cannot record lectures or any form of audio in the classes, we cannot have powerpoints in advance, and there is zero extra time on quizzes, tests, exams or homework. If we do not pass a certain section we get kicked out of the program with only 1 rewrite throughout. As an example, Pharmacology alone requires 90% average and the program is condensed compared to University and College ranks. When you ask a fish to climb a tree when compared to a monkey, it will always believe it is a failure despite not having the appendages to climb the tree. Your instructors tell you that no one in the course will become researchers or doctors and that every single one of them hated being an LPN while teaching the LPN course to us. My plan is to continue my education through Oxford online, Harvard extension online, Stanford online, Coursera, and become a psychologist specializing in ADHD. Canada needs change, and it is heartbreaking knowing that there are kids such as myself, younger than myself, who are consistently shattered over a misunderstanding and unconscious scrutiny from academic figures. We were not born for a system made for brains that function differently than our own.
All ADHDers (me included) should have their Vitamin D2/D3 levels checked with a specific blood test just for D. Low D and/or B6 can effect your GABA which can add to stress/anxiety. Stress and anxiety can lower your D levels ...that's how stress and/or depression symptoms can start to spin out of control. I'm not a doctor but I'd like to play one on TV.
I didn't realize Rick was a fellow Canuck! The Adult ADHD video on his channel has helped both explain my diagnosis to my family and helped my sister and mum figure out that they're dealing with ADHD as well!
When I was on LSD, my brain started firing synapses it never fired and I had executive function and focus. I was able to socialize and process my thoughts and feelings like a high speed computer. And then at the end of the day, I realized how much I loved science even though I thought I hated it because I was always terrible at it.. so I’m going to tell whoever is reading this, you are not your diagnosis. You have so much potential for everything you want to be and I know it’s really hard having ADHD, but we have each other and we will keep finding ways.
I love both of you. I have adhd and I grew up with it... 1980's to today. It's tricky. It's a constant thing... but it gets worse with stress or depression. I will Never say that it's something that could be confused for depression - they are VERY different animals. Personally, also, I don't like doctors that dismiss adhd as depression or anxiety. I was put on SSRI's which are, find out later, the Worst - THE Worst - Thing you could take if you are AT ALL affected by ADHD. Made me a zombie for two and a half years. Also, Jessica, it helps to know you dont always use everything in your toolbox. I keep forgetting anything of a toolbox exists.
Very good video! I had to do a brain dump before being able to write term papers in college. I'm totally unorganized! I just can't get control of life. My short term memory is bad and I'm anxious which really robs my memory. Long term memory for big events is good though. I agree with everything you both said except the excuse thing. If you're late to work, make a bad choice, are aren't able to do something, it's not your fault, and it's not an excuse, it's a reason! And the reason is ADHD! This is a type of disability, I personally wouldn't minimize it. It's a big deal and it's a big part of who you are.
@jessica I'm a grown man who gets emotional watching your videos as they have gave me SUCH a better understanding of how our ADHD brain works and how to overcome obstacles. I still never tell people I have it because I feel most people wouldn't understand it, I just apologize for my mess ups and try to do better moving forward. Thank you SO MUCH for this channel.
I discovered your videos about 12 hours ago...and have lost count of how many I’ve seen but I think “almost all of them” is a pretty accurate assessment! LOL I was diagnosed later (30’s) in life and spent another few years in denial because I felt so very broken. Always did exceptionally well in school and work but goodness, the energy expended just to function at “normal” was exhausting and I’d burn out often. I felt broken until I started seeing signs of ADHD in one of my kids. This really changes your mindset because when you love your kids and see them struggle it kills you. And what’s more is you don’t see your little ones as broken. They’re perfect...so there’s got to be more to this. Your content has seriously impacted me. You’re my hero. Thank you for all your hard work, dedication and for being brave. 🙏🏼
The getting out the door on time bit, oof man.. i cant have a lot of time, i have to have just shy of imma be late time, because then i get mooving, and i dont sit down for what was supposed to be 10 minutes but ended up being 15-20-25 due to time blindnes and not wanting to use an alarm cause i often dont check well enough and i set them on for the wrong time and i also set my clocks, like microwave and oven a little a head, but i mix it up semi regularly (power outs, needed the plug, etc etc) so i dont remember if its 6-9-13 or 5 minutes a head and i try not to use my phone clock and i just follow those clocks as well i can
Atomic clocks have been my saving grace. I have 4 around the house, they synch automatically to the NIST atomic clock radio signal. When you set them up, you choose your time zone and of you're in a DST zone, and it sets itself in a few minutes (with good radio strength).
I have to have multiple clocks so that I can believe them, I do have magical thinking when it comes to time, especially when I have the stress of getting ready, and most especially when it's a family event. I do like to have several clocks so that I can see one easily from any important area, like kitchen, bathroom, one I can see from working in the yard. I do have an atomic clock and 99.9% of the time it's great but there have been glitches before. Instead of setting my clocks wrong, I lie to myself about how long I need to get ready, and add a half hour and that tends to help me be on time, and I add a half hour to time needed to get somewhere because otherwise I'm late. I plan this ahead of time and write it down if important. Must get ready by....must leave by...or must wake by... And for family events, because it causes me a lot of stress I have to lie by an hour at least. This was something I had to choose intentionally because I was always late and always stressed about getting ready and always stressed about getting there on time. So without doing this, I would be stressed and late, but if I add in the extra time, then I can feel more comfortable like I'm right on time and not in a hurry and then I don't have to be ashamed that I was late to everything.
i bailed on college twice, but finished 3 tech schools because i actually enjoyed the subjects. and i dont have a job doing anything i ever went to school for LOL
"It's an explanation, not an excuse" is a mantra in our house - first for Jr., now for me as well. It means that there's a reason why we struggle or even fail, but we can't just lean back and say "I'm not even going to try, because I have ADHD" - it means "Be patient, I'm working on it, and I may need some support but I'll put in the effort too".
Jessica Thank you so much for your content. I am a relatively new viewer, maybe a year. I have always had struggles in school and was told (well mom was) by my Kindergarten teacher that I had ADD. Mom didnt believe it. Third grade I was told to get help and be held back. Had a slew of brain scans and tests. Officially diagnosed as ADD around then. Put on retalin. Mom still didnt believe until the winter i cleaned the drive way dry. I became so hyper focused. As a young adult I started to believe there was more. My mom always said no its only ADD you dont have ADHD. Mom passed away 2.5 years ago and Im finally learning more. I really struggled. More than I realized. I have always had sensory perseption issues that I just brushed off. Caused problems but didnt know how to get it out. I have/had anxiety that never knew what was going on. Things that Im finally learning over. I had an amazing Dr. He was top of his field in ADD/ADHD in adolescents. This was in the 90s when it was 2 separate diagnostics. He taught me tools thag I still use and Im learning more. I cried when I found your channel. I felt I finally have explanations other than just daydreaming. Sensory perception issues, anxiety, impulse control issues. I hope to one day get a dog to help with issues. But Im not responsible enough yet. Thank you and God bless you. Sincerely, Erika
Thank you so much for these videos. I have just recently been diagnosed with adhd and your videos have been so helpful in understanding and having fun with it all.
I’ve never had a problem talking about my ADHD, Always heard it was just an excuse. Anyhow, I enjoy your Show! It makes me feel like I’m not alone. You are. Your an inspiration. Thank you
Hey, I just want to say that I really appreciate you admitting how you used to do comedy like that. I think we all, at some point, have helped to perpetuate those myths and false stereotypes. And I think it's really great how you don't judge people who do the same.
yah Jessica!! my earliest symptoms were losing things - coats, shoes, food in the refrigerator because I couldn't see it.. without any diagnosis or understanding of why I was this way my mom was a huge advocate! She taught me good compulsive habits on how to set up my room, buying things that I loved to look at, touch, whatever to hold things that I would regularly lose- keys, planners, my phone.. placing notes on non-transparent cabinets to remind me where things were.
"start small or do it badly" = brilliant! I wrote that on a sticky note just now for my work desk. Starting is the hardest part! Thank you for being role-models!
Okay, you guys have me crying while I'm walking the dog. Rick talking about his and his son's problems at school sound so familiar, from gifted program (where I was not so lucky), to bombing out at so many schools and socially.
All the cool people have ADHD, why wouldn't we want to talk about it. Guys, we can take control of the shame by not being embarrassed by our diagnoses.
Jess, thank you, thank you, thank you, for bringing us all this knowledge. You've paved the road, you've made it safer for all of us.
I hate everything, I keep thinking about how my possible actions could have a negative effect and my head is filled with bad stuff, I feel in love and hated it, I am struggling through college but not because it's hard but the people who seem nice but I can see through them that they secretly dislike me. Why does this happen?
@@Lemon_Push emotional dysregulation and rejection sensitivity dysphoria are real things and really hard sometimes. First things first....it's okay. We all struggle! Know you are loved and worth it.
Make sure to pause and reflect. Practice mindfulness, you'll be amazed how much it will help.
Watch through Jessica's videos...there's several that will really help! If you need, feel free to reach out to me if you need to
@@LcplMJones thank you :)
I won't tell people I have ADHD because they might think I'm just making an excuse when I'm really just lazy
@@Ustazgay That would be their choice to make and you can then quit worrying about what they are thinking. My friends knew it before i told them why. LOL
How many of you are reading the comments *while* watching the video?
Damn, caught me!
It's the adhd way
ME TOO HALF WAY WATCHING AND READING ITS GOING TO TAKE AN HOUR TO FINNISH IT LOL
Must be well over 50% right?
Me
The worst of admitting you have adhd is that they say " so now you've find this excuse for your laziness and disorganization?"
It really hurts
@Niloufar Karimian Taheri
It hurts soo bad I know..
Like, you come so far thinking you’re just a failure, then you realize you aren’t you just have a condition, and you tell others, only for them to INVALIDATE to afterwards
:(
I don't think people like that are going to understand, but you might reply, well actually I found a reason why I struggle so much with that.
And then after that try not to let yourself feel bad by what they said, because it was really not very nice. And it is more important what you think of yourself.
Sometimes people are inconsiderate, thoughtless, judgmental, and mean, whether they meant to or not.
While it is natural for you to have been hurt by this, especially since you already felt bad about it, it is your choice how you want to think about it afterwards.
Cut yourself some slack. Tell yourself I'm doing a good job and I'm getting better and I'm learning new ways to work with things like this. I love me just how I am, and I want to get even better.
That is the important part, how you treat yourself and think of yourself.
Now take the parts that you don't feel good about, and find some coping mechanisms that make things better. No judgement, just things that work for you.
Sometimes it is all about a different style of how to make things work .
For example, I doubt you're lazy. Perhaps you are overwhelmed or have trouble getting started. Or maybe you're exhausted.
I get overwhelmed, so it's good to think about it in smaller parts, and instead of thinking of the whole thing to think I'll just spend 10 minutes doing this.
I also find it helpful to write all the goals on a sheet and then pick the most important ones, because otherwise I'll just want to do something but everything's on my mind.
It's also helpful for me to realize it doesn't have to be perfect the first time because I can always change it later.
It's also helpful for me to think I'm just going to do three things.
Sometimes I have to break the project down into easy pieces.
And if I'm feeling depressed sometimes I actually have to do 10 minutes of action and a break or reward and the timer actually helps.
You've got this. You were meant to be. You are valuable and you are good just as you are, but you will only get better.
I agree... I thought I'd be understood but I guess, I still wasn't.
@@Anxiou5Panda it was worth trying to help them understand, but if they still don't, then it's on them and reflects more about them than about you
And at that point you should protect yourself by using your opinion about it rather than theirs since they clearly don't get it
It's hard not to hit below the belt after that, so to speak. You let whoever told you this know that they are discriminating against someone with a learning disability. This is serious and if you let it happen they will think it's OK, it's not.
I too cried a lot when I began doing research about ADHD. I spent my whole life mentally beating myself up about certain behaviors and went through so much anguish trying and failing to fix them. The research made me realize I had been punishing a fish for being unable to climb. I never realized the fish had fins instead of feet.
Sara I know exactly how you feel. I used to call myself horrible things every time I messed up before getting my diagnosis and learning what ADHD actually does to a person. Even though I still struggle with a lot of the same problems, I have learned to forgive myself a lot easier as well.
Me too. I didn't expect to be so emotional but I remember sitting in the drs office sobbing when I first got my diagnosis. It was both tremendous relief ("there's nothing wrong with me") and a sense of sadness for all the self-blame and guilt I'd held on too. It's been such a crazy journey but I'm now at a place where I've (mostly!) Stopped beating myself up for mistakes and I'm comfortable with who I am. Hugs to you all.
Yes. The catharsis was real. I cried too.
Whereas i was all like "oh come on, you could climb a tree with fins, you god damn lazy lightweight"
If fish don’t have feet then how they move?
"donating to the world"
I'm stealing this. "I didn't lose it, I donated it to the world!"
SandyVanV I “donated” many a coat to the world as a child.
SandyVanV me too lol 😂
With the coats, I guess I have to be thankful that we got designated places to hang them in primary school. It wasn't even ADHD proofing the school, it was simply to make organization easier on them.
In this way, I never lost my coat as far as I can remember. I just was more inclined to forget things with me or where I put them in my room...
heh that is such a nice way of phrasing it
I would do it too!!! 🤣🤣🤣
"She's smart, she can't have ADHD" is basically the story of my life. If I had been diagnosed as a kid it would have been life changing.
I feel this so much, at 19 I've been diagnosed with autism, ADHD, and GAD. I always thought I was just a forgetful and fidgety geek mildly incompatible with life.
I'm 30 and still undiagnosed because of this
@@ADevilFromHeaven I’m 40 just diagnosed
@@navyblue9355 For me, they diagnosed the ADHD, but missed the Autism. I understand in retrospect though, it's probably one of the most tricky comorbidities to catch.
My Sister was JUST medically gaslit with the same answer.
I'm a teacher and I actively talk about my ADHD to show my students that it's not supposed to be a taboo and it's just a normal part of life. Also, I want them to see that you can be successful and have a working life with a neurodivergent brain.
@Drecon84 In doing what you are doing by representing, you are also setting those little brains a great example to seeing the beauty of differences. They will be more likely to be kind and understanding towards those with mental illnesses, physical handicaps and many other challenges. You are normalizing difference. Hurrah!!
@@evansfamily8156 I hope so
Hey I'm a community college professor and I think ADHD helps me be a better teacher! From one teacher to another, keep up the good work! It's so difficult these days to teach and manage everything with Covid being a thing, but I hope to encourage you to push on. :)
Me too! And I love it whenever I get a new child with ADHD in class and I can act with constructive empathy and not just sympathy. Love telling the parents that I too am in the exclusive club and seeing their faces.
I was diagnosed yesterday at 37. I'm shouting it because I finally don't feel guilty for my problems
Rick gave me the best advice about overwhelm and procrastination: Do one thing. When i am feeling overwhelmed I hear your voice in my head "Do one thing" and its saving me. Thanks man! Great to see my two favourite brains in one ep , again. Would really like to see an ep on our responses to rejection
Thanks I'll remember that
Amen.
Three sticky notes still stuck together. Write one task on each and dont look at second till you do the first. Helps calm the overwhelm. Do one thing now the celebrate the little victories. Yes tearing that top sticky note of IS a lil victory.
one step badly. Badly is fine.
"There is a difference between an excuse and an explanation." Thank you. When I was diagnosed I told my boyfriend at the time and whenever I forgot things, lost things, got distracted he took it personally and told me that it was because I didn't care not that I had ADHD. I got so upset every time my ADHD caused me to forget things (example: he said a month or so in the past that he wanted to go biking and was hurt I forgot to bring my bike home after my visit home from the weekend). I felt terrible and convinced myself after he kept telling me over and over that "if I loved him I would do better" that I was just a bad person and after failing to fix my mistakes permanently I knew I was a bad person. I never brought up my adhd as an explanation to him because he saw it as an excuse. We're not together now because he never understood the difference between an explanation and an excuse. To this day I never tell anyone I have ADHD, even my professors when something happens that is because of my ADHD I don't tell them why because I feel such a strong sense of rejection from it and that people will always see it as an "excuse." My parents at first when I told them I thought I had ADHD and then it was confirmed by my psychiatrist even had this idea that I was looking for an excuse and that if I was diagnosed with ADHD that I would use it as an excuse to be lazy. Fortunately they see how much treating my ADHD has improved my life now and don't feel that way anymore, but there's a lot of stigma out there. I feel like if I tell people I have ADHD they'll expect me to be this super-hyper person and not understand what it really is (I have inattention and hyperactivity). I have friends that buy ADHD meds illegally to help studying too. I feel like ADHD isn't really seen in the media or society in general as something that can severely hurt your quality of life and even cause depression and anxiety (I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety before ADHD) and instead it's just like "oh yeah some people are super hyper so they take meds to calm down" when it's so much worse and more complicated than that. I hope someday I feel more comfortable talking about my ADHD openly to people and stop beating myself up every time my ADHD symptoms mean I mess up. Your videos have helped me accept this part of myself (:
Madeline Lyons that breaks my heart. Your ex was emotionally abusive. You have rights when it comes to your education and they are legally obligated to accommodate you. You definitely should tell your school! It’s not an excuse. It’s reality. Nobody expects people to apologize for not being able to walk. You have no obligation to apologize for your brain chemistry!
I really relate to your story. I went through something similar with my then best friend. When that friendship ended I started to realize how much it had effected my self esteem and how negative I started to think about myself. It has gotten a lot better since then and I hope it got better for you too! If you ever need someone to talk to who wouldn’t judge or dismiss your ADHD (cause I have it too :). I know how difficult it can be to talk to people who don’t really understand. I struggle with that too. So if you’d ever like to talk, just let me know :)
Abusers always find something to tear you down. It's the structure.
Excellent job opening up ! This is very helpful testimony for others to hear/read/learn from....
When the two people responsible for me persuing a diagnosis do a video together.
ME TOO
Wow thats so cool. I got diagnosed a month back got my medication today.
Yaaaasss!
Yeeeesssss!!!! Truth!
Yep. She changed my life, and now my daughter won’t have to live through my struggles not knowing why.
"I started seeing myself in a different light, because now I was seeing I wasn't someone that for some reason was just terrible at life."
Dear God.... thank you. Thank you so much.
Diagnosed in my 50's. I thought I was a renaissance man, bouncing around from one field to the next. Turns out I have adhd. My brain has a non-standard o/s. It's not always clear whether I'm dealing with a feature or a bug.
You know, sometimes I wonder if maybe some of those "Renaissance people" actually had it, and it just so happened that the culture of their time valued some of the fields that symptoms happen to fall into, so they somehow stumbled into fame. 🤔
Brilliant analogy
It doesn't have to be a feature or a bug. It's just different. Running Linux rather than Windows might make things difficult sometimes when you want to interface but it's not specifically bad or good, right?
So well put, Sir.
As a UX designers ADHD I can relate to this analogy sooo well. Cheers to non-standard OS’s! ;)
*_Thank you!_* For flying to Canada for us :D
I started an office job for the first time this September. It turns out it’s PERFECT for me for being on time and working productively. I leave my work at work, so it’s not in my head at home. I aim to be at work at 8 am. But if I’m there at 8:15, 8:30 8:45 or 9, it’s still fine. I just stay longer. But my motivation to aim for 8 am doesn’t go away, because if I do finally manage to do it, I can go home earlier which I want. And I will always have something to do if I’m earlier. For most things I hate being early because I have nothing to do, I just wait. So now at work my motivation to be early is not going away. I love it ^^
Great video!! My family don't believe it's a real thing. I can't tell them anything about this. I needed help as a kid, but never got taken seriously. I'm 28 now. It has taken 3 years for my diagnosis and I've done it alone. It's so, so hard. Your channel helps a lot. I wish everyone was as open as you. Thanks, Jess and Rick 🕊️🕊️🕊️
I had to do it and advocate for myself too. It is what it is I guess though
@@brenrevlis128 Yeah, exactly that. It hasn't been easy but we have to keep going! 🙌🙌
TOOK ME 52 YEARS TO FIND OUT. FAMILY THINKS I STILL DONT HAVE IT. AND I AM MAKING IT UP.
@@runneryg it's as real as anything else mate. I really hope you get some resolve
They might feel guilty for not helping sooner or they simply don't understand. Don't blame them either way. One of them might be ADHD too.
I had no idea when I was younger, but now thinking back my earliest sign was failing classes from not paying attention. At first when I looked back at it I thought I was just a lazy kid who didn't want to work, but going back to school as an adult I realize its almost impossible to force yourself to pay attention to something. I was even say to myself in my brain "alright I'm gonna listen and take notes" like I'm trying to use my brain manually but a few minutes later my brain is just gone again, I'm either day dreaming, picking my fingers, shaking my leg and scribbling on paper, etc.
swear lol
Yes the epic crossover continues!!!
yeahhhh, we figured we should actually answer at least ONE question, and then we got one-more-thing-itis...
One-more-thing-itis!!! LOVE IT 🤣🤣🤣
I think about my medication like my glasses too. In fact, when I get to work and start struggling, I check to see which of those two things i've forgotten. They have a similar impact on my productivity.
10:06 If you can't see a specialist, help your doctor by taking a printout of an online screening test result. I've always found it helps. Write down as many of your symptoms as you can.
What online screening do you recommend?
Honestly it will depend on your doctor. My psychiatrist does not respect online tests. Personally I don’t either, I think that an online test is much more likely to give a false positive than a psychological evaluation.
@@eye2eye899 I specifically said "if you can't see a specialist". I won't trust an online screening test over a psychiatric evaluation either.
I think online screeners based on actual psychology tools that TELL you to head to a doctor are useful.
Good idea, thanks!
I hear ya about the messy car!!! The panic attack when someone needs a lift...I just need to do something first...rush off to car and throw things where they can’t be seen 😂
That's me as well.
You have to put clean the car on the calendar and set it up as a recurring event.
I go to the same thing and I mean to clean the car and I never get out there to do it now that I keep it on the calendar and reserved that calendar day for that purpose it's been clean for three months. I mean it's been cleaned three times over the past three months but that's better than my past. You have to put it on the schedule I shall never remember to do it if you don't like me you'll mean to you mean to do it today you mean to do it in a few minutes but I would suggest reserving the time otherwise something else will get in the way and prevent it
@@ottotater2787 thanks for the tip! Hopefully I’ll have the same success as you. My favorite thing is going through the car wash so the outside is clean at least 😂
That was me too mum shamed me so much that although my car isn’t perfectly clean it’s not as bad as it used to be
I would love to see a video about rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD) effects ADHD.
Me too! I recognize this in myself and had no idea it might be part of my diagnosis. I also hope they can fix the spelling of ‘sensitive’ in the banner! 😉
Yes, I would love to know if professionals miss RSD and label as borderline
I believe she's made one about that, search RSD on her channel 😊
Thank you
I got my official brain diagnosis about a month ago at age 38 and started meds last week. I feel like a fog has lifted. Thank you so much. I am also now a Super Brain on Patreon. I never would have known without this channel. I wish I could give you a big hug. Thanks so much!
I'm 36 and never been diagnosed despite having multiple symptoms. What kind of meds did they put you on and how much of a difference did they make?
Jonathan: I was first diagnosed sometime around the second half of 1999. I was 38 years old at the time....
What's up diagnosed at 38 club member! The lifting of the fog is so real.
I’m not ashamed of admitting I have adhd but I hate saying it because then people wanna pay me for my meds. Like no I literally need it to function 🙄
Bren Revlis I’m thankful I’ve never had that problem.
I'm sorry that happens, I've never had that problem.
I hear ya! Saaaaaame
Yea same
Lmao
2 take aways for me. First that you, Jessica, went from an uninformed stand-up comedian to a well-informed sit-down one. I love that you keep your sense of humor even with all of the seriousness with which you face the challenges of ADHD. ...and second, Jessica, your concise explanation about first doing a brain dump before trying to organize the muddled thoughts rattling around inside. I have sometimes been asked to proof-read and edit someone else's work and find that process to be much easier than creating my own work. So, if I apply the brain dump concept, I will treat my own work as nothing more than jumbled up thoughts in need of a brain dump that I can get outside of my head and then employ my better developed editing skills to create meaning out of the chaos. Also, thanks for the metaphorical arrow pointing to Rick's insights on the topic.
I’m so thankful that you had no shame in taking about your ADHD and making this channel! You’ve been an incredible help to me and so many others.
Similar to you, I’ve never been ashamed to acknowledge that I have ADHD, though I do still struggle with the shame of letting myself and others down as a result of my symptoms manifesting. As you know, it’s a work in progress.
I just want to thank you for everything you’ve done. Not only have you helped me learn more about myself and shown me that I’m not alone, you’ve been the biggest inspiration for me to start my own TH-cam channel and share my own struggles with ADHD, as well as provide the information I wish I had known 10 years ago.
I can’t wait to see your video about rejection sensitive dysphoria!
Hey nice to see you here bud, I am subscribed or your channel
You need to write a book about ADHD in general, detailing the knowledge you've discovered about your brain.
I just might someday :)
Could take off like Driven to Distraction.
Honestly we need more books from people with adhd
I just see books about how ADHD is a lie or something whereever I go... even in a specialist bookshop I could only find 1 attempting a neutral approach.
ADHD still appears to be quite the controversy here in Germany... at least from my experience.
I wouldn't be able to read more than a chapter of it. 🙈
Thank you so much. You have no idea how your videos helped me with my life . I really cried hard when i saw your video in TEDX i can relate so much . Much love ❤️ from Saudi Arabia
bouncer9404 I couldn’t hold back the tears while watching her TED talk as well. Very powerful.
READING YOUR COMMENT MAKES ME CRY. @@journeytowellness7096
Did you ever have suicidal thoughts because you. Felt alone and were a waste of space that is how I use to feel now I’m medicated so I’m better now
Yeah maybe once a week for nearly 20 years. Much better now.
Robnation I’m glad you are better now. I am to meds are amazing
@@lesleyfay7133 Good! It's weird to look back at my past... it's like I don't know who that guy was anymore! Depression is a freaky thing. Ask your main doctor to check your Vitamin D levels. (D2 D3) If they are low that can add to anybody's anxiety and/or stress levels. Vitamin D and B6 control GABA levels. (don't take a GABA supplement though) Start googling!
So glad you're better! Sending lots of love 💛
Every so often, more so the details. Would I leave a note, who would go to the funeral, some crazy unique way to go. It's more of a morbid curiosity than a cry for help though.
Oh wow!! Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria is mind blowing.... This makes so much sense now.
If you relate, look deeper. It’s a relationship killer and feels like self destruction of your soul.
It sure explains a lot.
I have a post-it taped to my front door that says do you have: Keys, phone, chargers and wallet? If not go back and try again! I need to update it with shoes and blood glucose meter! I don’t like to explain to neighbors that I’m locked out without shoes again. Amazing where I get locked out of without shoes.
I cross stitched "Phone Keys Wallet" to hang by the door. It was a mantra I grew up with because my mother knew how forgetful I was
I love the fact that the topics are kept track of in the bottom right hand corner. It's really keeping me on track.
Rick Green is a national treasure. You don't even know the celebrity you just met.
Why would you assume she doesn't know that or consider jess the national treasure
Jess is a national treasure - just not a Canadian one.
I think they both are! :)
Man I am SO glad I found out all the accurate information when I was still a junior in high school. I'm doing concurrent enrollment college classes, and they are crazy hard to focus on/time manage with. I'm actually watching this video because I was having a lot of trouble with writing a paper, and I thought a little break could help.
Anyways, what I'm trying to say is that I love having all the resources I do, because if I get started on improving my life now then in a few years it will be great! Or at least I'll be able to find coping strategies for problems easier. Thanks for all you guys do.
I'm back. See, my memory and concentration are bad. I know someone who has a son that has ADHD, and I think it's quite possble she may have it too. My point is that even people who may have it don't even understand it. She and her husband treat their grow son as if they are tough on him he will get into gear and everything will be alright, which you know it doesn't work that way. Many, many, many, people, even therapist just don't get it, but especially the average person. Their thinking is if they can't see it, like a person in a wheelchair, then it's no big deal.
THAT'S MY POINT TOO.
Pray for me, I have to do a 6:40 minute presentation for a communication class Upper level for my final, I'm not even a comm major
Good Luck!!!!
I pray for you 🙏 💛 😊
I'd was in a deathly cold sweat & was glued to my seat & couldn't move. I was so terrified I bolted & lost my grip on going back to do College. Have more guts than I had friend. It's just the thought of the duration of how long it lasts for... Can u get someone to help u make up 8 to 10 CUE CARDS for when your mind gets distracted or frozen?
All the best
🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
i was 20 when i first read how adhd affected me and man how i cried. i think it was happy crying tho, like finally finding out what's actually going on in you're life.
Hi Jess! Flying to Canada is some real dedication! 💪🏻
The scariest thing for me was realizing that I was actually putting playing with my kids off or starting projects with them off.... I felt awful and guilty. I also was very angry and had rage because I kept being over-stimulated by my kids and by my life stressors.. my adhd makes everything so much harder when I'm stressed.
Getting on my meds saved my relationship with my kids in very small ways but I can tell they are happier.
I have Bipolar Disorder and taking Lithium for many years.. I was concerned for my boy if he had ADHD, we both visited the specialist, my boy is okay but I got diagnosed with medium-severe ADD.. I didn't agree with the medication.. I've learned to deal with it by myself.. I'm 37 now, and I'm a pulmonologist..
Please never give up, never doubt or judge yourself..
I was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder. It was just ADHD.
@@robnation2475 May be there is no such thing as a certain diagnosis or do we really need it? Life changes, we change that's certain..
And ADHD is somehow better than Bipolar Disorder :)
Wish you a great day..
"Is there room among the woke, for the still waking?" Love it!💜
Its really cool for me to see these two together. It was Rick Green's channel "Totally ADD" That really helped me start to put the pieces together about me and ADD. I found out that I was diagnosed as a child way back in the 70's but I wasn't severe enough to warrant medication. They wanted a kid in grade school to start drinking coffee....So I went to the cafeteria during class and got a cup of coffee, with cream and sugar and came back to class. Nothing weird about that right??? So to this day I can't stand the taste of coffee and I can only remember having the one cup that day. I didn't fully understand everything that was happening and my parents didn't keep up with the latest info or treatments. So I recognized RIck from the Red Green show I used to watch on PBS after Dr. Who. It was the second time I came across his channel (the first was a few years prior but didn't lead to me doing anything) that more of the pieces came together and more of my life was falling apart. So I went to see a doctor, which led to getting my meds which have been the life saver. I then came across Jessica's channel which helped with all kinds of other stuff in my life. Jessica's videos were also free to watch on youtube which also helped.
So I was excited to see Rick and Jessica appear in the same vid answering questions about ADHD. So thanks guys for doing what you do.
Thank you Jess and Rick! I remember watching Rick’s television show 17 years ago when I was still trying to fake it “to be good enough, normal”. There was nothing in my world that even remotely spoke to ADHD as being valid or real or something that was wrong with me. Or, more succinctly - what was right with me. And just when I first was formally tested and diagnosed, Jess - I found your channel. To have you two together today as I’ve come through a three-year battle of serious comorbidities produced by generic meds and a non-responsive general practitioner’s office staff - I’m just so grateful for the both of you. So thank you again, I will continually tune in - as I remember to! I’m going to list it as a tool to regularly I can refer to on a Master List. There are times (weeks, months) when I don’t even remember why I am suffering is neglected ADHD and that I can stop the spinning at any time. Love to you both! 😘
I want to thank you both for you channels. I've struggled with a lot things in life but never knew why. I was diagnosed about a year a ago when my son was flagged, I saw a lot of things they were looking for in myself so asked my doctor to refer me, so he did without any issue or 2nd guessing me (I have a great doctor). When I was told I had ADHD I didn't really know what to do with that information and didn't get any support from the specialist about strategies or exploring to see if I had other symptoms I didn't know were ADHD. I was given meds based on the initial reason I thought I had ADHD (poor focus, poor concentration, poor memory, poor organisation) and yes it helped those aspects. I then struggled more with other symptoms with a false sense of "cured". It's through your channels I've learned about ADHD, what symptoms I have & help with managing them. Because of you both so many people are in a better place and better equipment to manage their symptoms.
I'm 30, after years and years of trying, getting in my own way, making excuses and running into therapists and psychiatrists who just didn't believe me, i FINALLY got a prescription for my very first ADHD Med.
Its sitting on my kitchen counter and now I'm terrified to start. I'm currently fighting a cold so I'm going to wait until I'm over this to start my new med but I've been what if-ing this to death since i got it from the pharmacy yesterday. Ugh, why am i like this?? Lol
Because change is scary, even if it is good. Good luck on your new journey.
Thank you for answering question 10! And thanks to the person who asked! I don’t have insurance and getting to mental health clinics is challenging for me. A family member suggested I research ADHD and I cried because it described so many things I’ve been dealing with for as long as I can remember. I found this channel and it’s been so helpful for me. When I can get on track, it’s been some of the best and most productive I’ve ever been. And I’m getting better at recognizing my patterns that throw me off balance. I want to get a formal diagnosis to have the ability to explore medication as an aide. But, I’m learning how to take care of my brain in a different way, formal diagnosis or not.
I'm happy to see you guys doing a video together. Unity is strength.
Ever since I was diagnosed add and aspergers certain people realize that I'm not doing it on purpose to forget or to not understand certain things and it feels like life is less of a burden in these situations. Getting help to understand myself and finding solutions to my struggles is very helpful. There is still a lot to learn yet what I have learned has reduced my anxiety levels in certain situations.
Thank you, both! I just got diagnosed a couple of months ago (at 43) and I’m so thankful for both of your channels and all of the information you have shared! I’ve learned so much already! And I love the humor! :)
Great Boomer and Millennial partnership! So helpful to us! ❤️
Sometimes rather than saying "sorry" you can say, "Thank You." Thank you for waiting for me. Or Thank You for your patience. Thank you for working with me on that.
You are a hero Jessica. Thank you so much for continuing the channel. I truly appreciate it from the bottom of my heart. I know that you will find your final, comfortable and happy truth xoxo, and thank you for helping me along the way towards finding mine. xo
Thank you jess and rick, i am from India where a lot of people are still in denial about it and your videos help me a lot with my struggles
I love the term ‘donating to the world’. Saying i have donated alot of scarfs feels so much better. Maybe i have actually helped people who need scarfs😂
I donated plenty of hats and umbrellas to people on buses and trains. 🤣
I donate one glove. .Every winter.
I'm very certain that I had ADHD, I've realised it for over a year now. But I haven't got a diagnosis yet. I feel so frustrated with battling the thoughts telling me that I'm only lazy, or making it up. I don't have an outlet or a specialist to talk about it right now. I'm so grateful to you for reminding me that I can still start to take control of my life without a diagnosis. This is huge. Big Hearts.
Thank you Jessica ❤️
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria? Is this is where "people pleaser" comes from? I stopped being one but, of course, at a great cost. I'm down to 1 friend. Still rolling 💪
Didn't even there was a name for it. I thought it was just a personality trait.
Not just an ADHD symptom but an Autistic one as well
Thanks for bullet journals, this one tip has changed (some) of my life! I am now on 1 year and 6 months of bujoing, and it’s the only organisational thing I’ve ever kept up with, it goes with me everywhere, it holds my whole life and mind, and therapeutic stuff, and a dream journal, it’s become everything to me, and it’s all thanks to your video! Thanks!
I've found it hard to get a diagnosis. My GP would rather a psychiatrist make the diagnosis. They're expensivd.
So in the absence of a prescription for meds, I've been trying the amino acid Tyrosine.
Our brains use Tyrosine (amongst other things) to make dopamine and as I understand it ADHD is a dopamine deficit issue as well as a 'wiring' problem.
The Tyrosine makes a difference, especially when I haven't slept.
Jessica, your channel has given me so much insight into my plight in life. Thank you.
THAT'S RIGHT! TYROSINE I GET SOME THX.
Hi Jessica! I'm from Australia and love your videos! I was diagnosed at 48 and watching your videos has let me gain some valuable tools. My daughter is diagnosed ADHD but I struggle with my ex-wife whom doubts the diagnosis due to the stigma surrounding ADHD. Also her parents are the type that when one "expert" says no, then there is no other explanation! Grrr! I now tell people I am ADHD and to expect anything! In a good way!
What a pair of ADHD ambassadors... these guys have done so much for our cause and effected our ability to not feel so alone. Not feeling like we’re broken and not feeling we are failing at normal... to quote Russ (club ADHD) “we are the new normal”🔥
The thought of hiding the fact that I had ADHD once I was finally diagnosed never really occurred to me. Unfortunately, I understand now why people do it on a professional level now though.
I lose things like it's my job and I forget sometimes the most important basic things! 🤦♂️🤷♂️🤣
I kind of like how I keep my own life interesting and exciting...lol
Yaaay. When I got back from dance and opened my phone, I was so happy to see a video from this channel!!😌☺️🥳
Emma Forever I know right! I always get so excited when I see a new video from her pop up in my notifications.
I appreciated Jessica's honesty about the stand up comedy. There is another comedian who is quite a star now who I saw before they became mega and they've not acknowledged it yet. Thank you. Great colab. :)
Pure Gold & Completely Safe is how I feel watching this, Jessica.
The frustration of being ADHD has taken a toll on my emotions and sometimes my self esteem.
Videos like this reassure me and my whole friggin' soul that I'm actually quite an amazing and interesting person.
Not better than others but different and exciting.
Thank you for giving me strength Jessica.
Sending a Bro Hug from Niagara Falls Canada
Dan-0
I wish I could get access to a specialist in ADHD. I brought all the self-reporting stuff, as well as the actual page from the DSM, and I was completely dismissed by the two psychiatrists. “Well, you’re an adult woman, so, you can’t really have ADHD.” 🙄
Rune Mist34 this is my fear. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist in January and I know from an article she contributed in that she considers ADHD to be diagnosed and even said to me that maybe I don’t want to go with her. I’m hoping if I bring back up information it’ll help but I’m genuinely concerned that she won’t give me the diagnosis, which means I can’t get the help available at my school.
@@Kikua1612 if she is closed-minded to it you should see someone else. You have nothing to prove to her if she does not believe in that .
That's ridiculous, ignorant, and misunderstood that they think an adult can't have ADD.... it just presents differently in adults, and in women, and with everyone. .
It has only been a month in and I entirely regret ever going into nursing school.
As a 20 y/o LPN student with ADHD w/medication, that has zero accommodations despite presenting them to the school, it is absolutely terrible. I can do research from all over the map and take online classes from Stanford and Harvard online. Yet, when you are being graded on a school structure not made for your brain, it crumbles you in every way humanly possible. I averaged 99% in precalc 11 and the year before 60% cause I was not on meds and could not retain focus, the following year I had accommodation w/meds.
It's not easy when those around you in an academic environment, especially that of a profession you once were so joyous to go into, belittle you and tell you "not to label yourself as ADHD" when requesting accommodation services (which cost $2000 CAD). We cannot record lectures or any form of audio in the classes, we cannot have powerpoints in advance, and there is zero extra time on quizzes, tests, exams or homework. If we do not pass a certain section we get kicked out of the program with only 1 rewrite throughout. As an example, Pharmacology alone requires 90% average and the program is condensed compared to University and College ranks.
When you ask a fish to climb a tree when compared to a monkey, it will always believe it is a failure despite not having the appendages to climb the tree.
Your instructors tell you that no one in the course will become researchers or doctors and that every single one of them hated being an LPN while teaching the LPN course to us.
My plan is to continue my education through Oxford online, Harvard extension online, Stanford online, Coursera, and become a psychologist specializing in ADHD.
Canada needs change, and it is heartbreaking knowing that there are kids such as myself, younger than myself, who are consistently shattered over a misunderstanding and unconscious scrutiny from academic figures. We were not born for a system made for brains that function differently than our own.
All ADHDers (me included) should have their Vitamin D2/D3 levels checked with a specific blood test just for D. Low D and/or B6 can effect your GABA which can add to stress/anxiety. Stress and anxiety can lower your D levels ...that's how stress and/or depression symptoms can start to spin out of control. I'm not a doctor but I'd like to play one on TV.
I didn't realize Rick was a fellow Canuck! The Adult ADHD video on his channel has helped both explain my diagnosis to my family and helped my sister and mum figure out that they're dealing with ADHD as well!
"Is there room among the woke, for the still waking." Beautiful statement.
Another great video Jess. I love hearing about other people's journeys. Hope there are more videos like this to come! 😁
Please enable subtitles if you are able to
When I was on LSD, my brain started firing synapses it never fired and I had executive function and focus. I was able to socialize and process my thoughts and feelings like a high speed computer. And then at the end of the day, I realized how much I loved science even though I thought I hated it because I was always terrible at it.. so I’m going to tell whoever is reading this, you are not your diagnosis. You have so much potential for everything you want to be and I know it’s really hard having ADHD, but we have each other and we will keep finding ways.
soul sanctification lol acid is dope
I love both of you. I have adhd and I grew up with it... 1980's to today. It's tricky. It's a constant thing... but it gets worse with stress or depression.
I will Never say that it's something that could be confused for depression - they are VERY different animals. Personally, also, I don't like doctors that dismiss adhd as depression or anxiety. I was put on SSRI's which are, find out later, the Worst -
THE Worst -
Thing you could take if you are AT ALL affected by ADHD. Made me a zombie for two and a half years.
Also, Jessica, it helps to know you dont always use everything in your toolbox.
I keep forgetting anything of a toolbox exists.
What an incredible video. Thanks so so much for making this.
Very good video! I had to do a brain dump before being able to write term papers in college. I'm totally unorganized! I just can't get control of life. My short term memory is bad and I'm anxious which really robs my memory. Long term memory for big events is good though. I agree with everything you both said except the excuse thing. If you're late to work, make a bad choice, are aren't able to do something, it's not your fault, and it's not an excuse, it's a reason! And the reason is ADHD! This is a type of disability, I personally wouldn't minimize it. It's a big deal and it's a big part of who you are.
I love these videos. I send them to family and friends all the time!
Every time I watch a video of yours I realize more and more of what I struggle has to do with ADHD and it helps :)
Love you thank you. For yet another great video. Always THANK YOU for information.
@jessica I'm a grown man who gets emotional watching your videos as they have gave me SUCH a better understanding of how our ADHD brain works and how to overcome obstacles. I still never tell people I have it because I feel most people wouldn't understand it, I just apologize for my mess ups and try to do better moving forward. Thank you SO MUCH for this channel.
I discovered your videos about 12 hours ago...and have lost count of how many I’ve seen but I think “almost all of them” is a pretty accurate assessment! LOL I was diagnosed later (30’s) in life and spent another few years in denial because I felt so very broken. Always did exceptionally well in school and work but goodness, the energy expended just to function at “normal” was exhausting and I’d burn out often. I felt broken until I started seeing signs of ADHD in one of my kids. This really changes your mindset because when you love your kids and see them struggle it kills you. And what’s more is you don’t see your little ones as broken. They’re perfect...so there’s got to be more to this. Your content has seriously impacted me. You’re my hero. Thank you for all your hard work, dedication and for being brave. 🙏🏼
Jessica makes me nod my head in agreement and say Yessssss out loud as well as cry. I’m straight but I love her and am so thankful to her xx
The getting out the door on time bit, oof man.. i cant have a lot of time, i have to have just shy of imma be late time, because then i get mooving, and i dont sit down for what was supposed to be 10 minutes but ended up being 15-20-25 due to time blindnes and not wanting to use an alarm cause i often dont check well enough and i set them on for the wrong time and i also set my clocks, like microwave and oven a little a head, but i mix it up semi regularly (power outs, needed the plug, etc etc) so i dont remember if its 6-9-13 or 5 minutes a head and i try not to use my phone clock and i just follow those clocks as well i can
Atomic clocks have been my saving grace. I have 4 around the house, they synch automatically to the NIST atomic clock radio signal.
When you set them up, you choose your time zone and of you're in a DST zone, and it sets itself in a few minutes (with good radio strength).
I have to have multiple clocks so that I can believe them, I do have magical thinking when it comes to time, especially when I have the stress of getting ready, and most especially when it's a family event.
I do like to have several clocks so that I can see one easily from any important area, like kitchen, bathroom, one I can see from working in the yard.
I do have an atomic clock and 99.9% of the time it's great but there have been glitches before.
Instead of setting my clocks wrong, I lie to myself about how long I need to get ready, and add a half hour and that tends to help me be on time, and I add a half hour to time needed to get somewhere because otherwise I'm late.
I plan this ahead of time and write it down if important. Must get ready by....must leave by...or must wake by...
And for family events, because it causes me a lot of stress I have to lie by an hour at least.
This was something I had to choose intentionally because I was always late and always stressed about getting ready and always stressed about getting there on time.
So without doing this, I would be stressed and late, but if I add in the extra time, then I can feel more comfortable like I'm right on time and not in a hurry and then I don't have to be ashamed that I was late to everything.
I love your videos so much. These are so helpful to my friends and me. 😊😊😊
i bailed on college twice, but finished 3 tech schools because i actually enjoyed the subjects. and i dont have a job doing anything i ever went to school for LOL
BRAIN DUMP. This is everything, thank you! Best write it down before I forget...
"It's an explanation, not an excuse" is a mantra in our house - first for Jr., now for me as well. It means that there's a reason why we struggle or even fail, but we can't just lean back and say "I'm not even going to try, because I have ADHD" - it means "Be patient, I'm working on it, and I may need some support but I'll put in the effort too".
I hope you had a good trip to Canada 🇨🇦
I did! I had maple syrup on everything!
Yummy 😋
You two together in a video is my favourite crossover! :D
I love this channel! Dr. Rick Green is a riot !
Jessica
Thank you so much for your content. I am a relatively new viewer, maybe a year.
I have always had struggles in school and was told (well mom was) by my Kindergarten teacher that I had ADD. Mom didnt believe it. Third grade I was told to get help and be held back. Had a slew of brain scans and tests. Officially diagnosed as ADD around then. Put on retalin. Mom still didnt believe until the winter i cleaned the drive way dry. I became so hyper focused. As a young adult I started to believe there was more. My mom always said no its only ADD you dont have ADHD. Mom passed away 2.5 years ago and Im finally learning more. I really struggled. More than I realized. I have always had sensory perseption issues that I just brushed off. Caused problems but didnt know how to get it out. I have/had anxiety that never knew what was going on. Things that Im finally learning over. I had an amazing Dr. He was top of his field in ADD/ADHD in adolescents. This was in the 90s when it was 2 separate diagnostics. He taught me tools thag I still use and Im learning more.
I cried when I found your channel. I felt I finally have explanations other than just daydreaming. Sensory perception issues, anxiety, impulse control issues. I hope to one day get a dog to help with issues. But Im not responsible enough yet.
Thank you and God bless you.
Sincerely,
Erika
#doctoriyhere
Thank you so much for these videos. I have just recently been diagnosed with adhd and your videos have been so helpful in understanding and having fun with it all.
“Start small and start badly” might have to be my new life motto.
I’ve never had a problem talking about my ADHD, Always heard it was just an excuse. Anyhow, I enjoy your Show! It makes me feel like I’m not alone. You are. Your an inspiration. Thank you
My earlier symptom was my constant fidgeting and getting distracted and bored easily.
You are both wonderful people! Thanks so much for sharing, your great humor and information! My family loves your videos!
this helps a lot, guys. thank you.
Hey, I just want to say that I really appreciate you admitting how you used to do comedy like that. I think we all, at some point, have helped to perpetuate those myths and false stereotypes. And I think it's really great how you don't judge people who do the same.
Much love to both of you 🌌💖🌌
I really appreciate your openness ✨
yah Jessica!! my earliest symptoms were losing things - coats, shoes, food in the refrigerator because I couldn't see it.. without any diagnosis or understanding of why I was this way my mom was a huge advocate! She taught me good compulsive habits on how to set up my room, buying things that I loved to look at, touch, whatever to hold things that I would regularly lose- keys, planners, my phone.. placing notes on non-transparent cabinets to remind me where things were.
"start small or do it badly" = brilliant! I wrote that on a sticky note just now for my work desk. Starting is the hardest part! Thank you for being role-models!
Okay, you guys have me crying while I'm walking the dog. Rick talking about his and his son's problems at school sound so familiar, from gifted program (where I was not so lucky), to bombing out at so many schools and socially.
Only about 5 minutes in but holy cow so much useful info on how to work with my ADHD!! Thank you so much!!