Pre-T Dysphoria ft. Chase Ross - FTM
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ส.ค. 2024
- Chase's Channel: / uppercasechase1
Use code TY14 for 10% off any FTM Essentials product- www.ftmessentia...
Facebook: / sebastiantyler.turner
Twitter: / partar400
Tumblr: / trippy-tyger
the first time i watched this i was pre-t, non passing and suicidal...
watching this today i'm now 6 months on testosterone and pass everywhere i go, looking back on what it felt like when my body was a prison.
this video helped me have the strength to get from then to now . thanks guys.
That's where I am now
I want to thank you as a parent of a trans teen. You and chase give such good advice and also education. I have been able to share some of your videos with other moms. By watching this video with my son I could see that I can not feel guilty for not knowing sooner and getting blockers. That everyone's journey is different and that includes parents. I may not have been ready to understand or accept this and so him coming out after puberty is just the way it happened for us both. His journey is as unique as anyone else's and I am glad he told me when he did. Thanks and keep up the good work.
I sometimes play mute (or having "lost my voice") in public so I don't have to let out my voice...
My dysphoria before starting T was horrible. I remember not being able to take a shower without crying and changing in front of anyone was totally out of the question. Being misgendered was really hard for me back then as well and I almost never left the house because my social anxiety and dysphoria made everything so difficult. I came out my freshman year of high school and didn't start T until my junior year. I remember contemplating suicide a lot before starting T and that was when my parents actually started listening to me. I never would've though that I would be at this point in my life and I just wanted to say to anyone reading this that hasn't started hormones, I promise that if you hold on, it will get better.
I to shower with sports bra or wash cloth to avoid looking at them but sometimes I see my hips and start feeling like I need to throw any how:/
I knew I could transition at 15. I got assessed at the clark which is now CAMH but I got turned away, one of the reasons I didn't try again is I thought I would just get turned down again.. I was so upset and never cried so hard in my entire life! I finally started to transition now, started hormones 2 and 1 half months before my birthday at 37.
I am a pre-t transguy and I have most of my dysphoria under control, but I have crippling voice dysphoria. There are times where I can't even talk because it is so bad. My voice is so high that everyone recognizes me as female when I talk, no matter how masculine I look.
I don't have much bottom dysphoria, and I'm okay with my chest as long as I don't have to look at it (like if I'm wearing a shirt).
My voice is the only thing holding me back.
But then I think about the day that I will be on t and things will start changing and I will be able to be the person I am meant to be.
My voice is the only thing that really affects me.
I am actually considering learning ASL so I don't have to talk.
Sucks. I'm have a deeper than average voice.
+Maddy Webb same i can grow some facial hair too. I'm lucky
I have bad voice dysphoria too. My dad has a higher than average voice too so my genetics are a bitch anyways lol
my voice is pretty deep but It still very much gives me dysphoria so I get it. It really fucking sucks
back before I understood myself at all, I was super dysphoric and I would try and be really girly (because I thought that I wasnt girly enough to fit in and thats why I was uncomfortable) In 5th to 8th grade I wore heavy makeup, and push up bras, and that was the least happy Ive ever been. I didn't know what I needed to do... so I kinda gave myself up... and then in the summer between my 8th grade year and my freshmen year I realized I was doing the opposite of what I really need. Ive been transgender for 2 years now and even though now I'm more dysphoric and disgusted by my old self, but I'll tell you, thats a hell of a lot better than not knowing myself at all. :) everyone will figure it out eventually.
Dude, I was exactly the same. I tried being girly and wearing make-up, but it was so unnatural to me and made me absolutely miserable. I was confused because I thought once puberty was in full-swing i'd suddenly 'get it' and feel like a girl. That never happened, and I realized I'd been in denial about the fact I have a male mind and personality, and I need my body to reflect my mind.
I was the same! Its crazy how overcompensating was what our minds jumped to
Ryuu Kenta
That's my story too
Anxiety around my gender for me (Im a pre T boy) is like.. you know when you skip a few stairs and you start panicking and feeling like you're gonna die ? it's like that but on a continuous loop and you never find that last step to make you stable again.
I get that same feeling... that's a really good way to describe it
Yeah I feel that , my mom called me hun (as in honey ) Wich iv ask her not to for a long time and I broke down and ran to my car and just cryed I was already feeling out about my hips and that's just a term that feels so girly to me.
My son is like that. Shutting himself in and all. He is 15 and just started testosterone. It was almost a two year wait. I love these video cause it helps kids like mine understand what is happening and also helps the parent understand too. I share the videos to other parents too.
"Nobody saw me the way I saw myself"
Just hit the feels
I'm a cisgirl and I just wanted to say I love your channel, I am fascinated by the transgender community and I love learning more about the subject, I have SO much respect for you guys. I couldn't imagine everything what you go through. (This goes for transgender women too). What you're doing here by posting videos about being trans, and the struggles and the dysphoria just everything you're educating this society and everyone else who might be unsure about it. Thank you (I could listen to your voice all day)
I came out to my parents recently along with my brother, his girlfriend, and 2 other friends. They're all so supportive and tell me that I should write down all my feelings about it and turn it into music because music is my life. I feel super excited to finally be somewhat free, but I'm only 15 and not allowed to get hormones until I'm 18 because my parents want me to be sure of my own choices and be able to take care of it all myself because no one in my family has ever had to deal with anything like this before... Soon, I can get a guy's haircut and clothes though so that's awesome ^^ also I'm making a list of names for them to vote on to help me pick a new name. I have super bad dysphoria though but my binder helps with a lot of it. I'm slowly getting better and every time my friend calls me her little brother or my stepdad says "I love you son" or calls me by Shaun (my second middle name because I haven't picked a name yet) I feel like I'm seriously about to cry from happiness.
+Planetary Go! yassss!
This helps me feel....normal
you are normal! youre not alone in this stay strong bro
I've finally gathered the guts to cut my hair how I wanted it.. I'm going to come out to my family soon. Wish me luck!
How'd it go??
Dang chase and his cat wall I always get so distracted, lol.
I know XD I find my self listening and looking at the cats..a lot
I honestly hope my boyfriend watches this to help him...
Pre-T dysphoria isn't so bad right now because in just turning 14, so I can pass no problem, it's just my mom like insists on using female pronouns and like emphasizes them even though I came out. That sucks, but for right now im okay.
I'm sure sooner or later she'll pull through man, good luck!
I'm in the same situation man. Exact same.
TheComedyClownfish not to minimise but almost every one hates their body at puberty and just before puberty. I transitioned and it was the complete wrong thing. Just give yourself time and space. not liking parts of your body doesn't necessarily mean you are trans. Do some thinking and reading and be kind to yourself. xxx
@@keirtaylor4669 There is a difference between gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia/insecurities. For some people, it can be hard to distinct the difference when it's them themselves dealing with such feelings, though.
But I understand you have good intentions
i came out at age 13, I've been waiting 3 years for hormones and now im starting blockers in a few days, i never thought I would get this far, I thought I would never transition and i'd die with the wrong name on my grave, keep going everyone, please, I swear it will get better and even if you cant transition right now, you can find people who support you and love you for your true gender.
I know this was months ago but chase is still a cutie! Ok back to the video I goooooo!
this makes me understand how my boyfriend feels:( i wish i could do something to make him not feel this way but i know i cant and that sucks
Y’all still going strong lol?
I'm not sure if this is a good thing but sometimes I feel the dysphoria building up and I feel that I may want to watch this video to push me over the edge just so that I can cry it out.
smooth hair tyler
Although I really enjoyed this video and your guys' advise, putting yourself into the mindset of one day I'll be able to transition and not comparing yourself to other guys is kind of impossible. As someone who is pre-T it is so hard knowing that I can't start living the way I need and want to live my life until I'm of legal age.
every video i watch about dysphoria is always like "really bad dysphoria is a sign of being trans blah blah" and i dont get really bad phyically dysphoria and it makes me feel like i'm not trans.
It doesn't make you anyless trans. I only have mild dysphoria and im still trans
Dude i was thinking the EXACT same thing! 'I never felt this bad, maybe im not, but i KNOW i am, but this makes me feel like a faker,' then all the times in public everyone feels bad for genderbending me comes back and i just feel bad all over :(
BraveAsTheyCome I feel the same way.
BraveAsTheyCome I don't usually get really bad dysphoria (I'm pre-T) but starting to be farther away from friends, since school ended, I feel it a lot more, since only my friends only really call me Adam.
I remember calling some pizza place: me:"hello-" they:"yes sir what would you like to order" and I just hanged the phone and was happy/crying for the rest of the day.
I relate to this too much..... too much right now, even on T sometimes, I feel like: nothing is happening, but its a lot less than pre T. Now I can cope more with life
7 months - damn I bloody wish i've been waiting 3 years+ and I still have another 1-2 year wait for t jesus you were lucky
Guys thank you so much for this video!
You two are such amazing guys and help a lot of people, including me!
I'm right now pre t and my dysphoria is a little up and down. I do not pass at all right now. I'm 27 years young and only 4'6" and society and their uneducated ignorance is overwhelming at times. Family and people who know me are the ones who trigger my dysphoria the most. I just look up to you two guys. thanks for all your helpful educational videos.
Omg you look really handsome!!😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
Thank you guys!
I'm 15, I recently came out, and I constantly feel dysphoric because my mom doesn't accept me for who I am. I'm not even allowed to cut my hair, and I just HATE it.
.. I have to wait 5 years before I'm even allowed to have T, excluding the waiting list.
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for this video!
I just wanted to comment because oh my god, the feelings of dysphoria! The way it was described is EXACTLY what I feel, but I've never really recognized it as such! Thank you so much for this video, it answered so many questions for me! Kind of sad that I'm only just realizing this at 22, but I guess we all start somewhere.
dude this helped a lot. I'm questioning but i do experience dysphoria when I'm out and especially at school. Right now I just feel so uncomfortable about my boobs and I wish they weren't there.
Honestly needed this video tonight
youre such a sweetie an so strong, subscribed
He's so cute
Hair looks great bro. And the video was very helpful. Thank you.
I feel so shit because my dysphoria isn't that bad, it's mostly like 'mmh I'd like it better if it was this way', if I look at my face 'oh I thought I looked more masculine' or 'this doesn't look right', so I kind of think I'm not trans and that I'm just trying to convince myself so that's great :)
Awesome video guys!
I like the sound of "be the me that I see"
oh man i feel that part about walking past the mirror and crying so hard
Told some of my friends today how i've been feeling. I'm so thankful they're understanding. Now time to tell my parents..
Holymoly! You, sir, are freaking attractive. I'm sorry, I know that has nothing to do with the video. My soul just wanted me to tell you.
Tayler is so beautiful
sometimes i watch these kinds of videos bawling my eyes out when my dysphoria gets really bad. all the tips i see in videos never really help, i just lay in bed for days (because im online schooled so i dont leave for school) and cry all the time. i dont have a packer and i have REALLY terrible bottom dysphoria, but my parents wont let me get one cuz its weird i guess. socks dont work well for me and my chest is never flat enough and my hips... dont get me started. Anyway i guess ill get through this, ill have a deep voice and muscles and a smile on my face someday.
Gosh they were so smol 😭❤
"There was about 7 months in between my coming out and me starting T"
Ahaha
Ahhahahahaahahhshahshsaha
I've been out for a year almost, and I can't start T for another 3 years
I feel that bro I need to turn 18 fast
i have top dysphoria the most. because i have a naturally large chest. even with a binder. i look like a B cup at least so i never pass. i told my best friend of 7 years yesterday that i am trans and he is being the most supportive person ever. he hates being male so he joked saying lets switch bodies 😂😂
+Aiden the potato How old are you?
solo una persona mas i will be 19 in may
Aiden the potato ok, you never stopped puberty, and the female hormones made your chest growth, you probably can eliminate the boobswith exercices when you start with testosterone
solo una persona mas i'm going to be having surgery anyway
I got on T maybe 3-4 months after I came out and started binding.
USA!!! USA!!!
And you are both awesome
Xo from Canada
look at this babies
so excited to see this colab haha great job yo
BABYS!!! 💙💙💙💙
well i'm pre-t and my parents are homophobic(i'm bisexual )and transphobic, i have a breast-, bottom-,and voice dysphoria and the worst of all coming-out-dysphoria
My first experience with passing in public was at a gas station (cashier called me sir), then I spoke, and I knew I was no longer interpret as a male. It honeslty crushed me, but I deal with being misgendered once I speak in school all the time now.
you know you have gender dysphoria when you get so excited you cry when you find they have men's jeans your size
Great information guys.... love it. You both are such a inspiration to me personally. Thanks really....
I rally liked the advice and I ser what you mean about always looking to where you want to beste and where you can be. For me this is the hardest thing, because where I live you havet literally one chance of convincing the doctors that you arena trans and that you should be allowed to transition. Unfortunately only 20% of the people who talk to doctors about transitioning are actually allowed to transition. For me being rejected when I finally pick up the courage to go see a doctor is my biggest far. I Just feel like I have nothing to keep me going, really.
I do feel the same as u guys felt... I can't talk to people for my voice, I can't stand straight for my chest, and other horrible things... 😢
I'm in such a country, where transition isn't possible... and people don't understand transgenders...
It sounds stupid but my dysphoria has always been weird in the way I identify it to myself. For ages I was terrified of the idea that I could be trans so I called myself genderfluid. And I always assumed that on days when my dysphoria was barely there I was just a girl that day, and when I was almost suicidal I figured 'oh I must be a guy today'. And I've only recently thought through it and realised that all those days I wasn't a girl I just wasn't struggling then
And it's slightly scary now because I came out to a couple friends and my mom as genderfluid. So now I'm terrified to tell them different (plus my dad's transphobic)
Rant over, Ty you're my main point of inspiration. Good luck in your transition
Even tho I have mini problems with appearance. I know I'm definitely wayyyy luckier than some of these other pre T guys. I'm 6ft, I have a pretty masculine body for some one with out T, my voice has naturally been getting lower due to me exercising my vocals a certain way. I also I have a very small chest, like you'd only notice anything if I pointed it out or if you were staring realllyyy hard at me for a bit. I still get dysphoria tho, when I'm around other guys especially, even tho I can pass very well around other guys it still makes me feel anxious and impatient. But I'm starting T next summer! Which has honestly made most of my dysphoria melt away, like things that used to make me explode I laugh at now. So to all my bros you will get there my dudes.
But to all of my other pre T brothers that aren't as lucky as myself are that you are all handsome af, masculine asf and I appreciate all you dudes. Everyone who ever doubted you will regret that shit so bad, cause you are amazing.
Do I have dysphoria? I couldn't look in the mirror. I hated my image. My mom told me that I am beautiful and many others did too but somehow I never found my image appealing. I always wore baggy clothes, never found anything comfy in the women's section. I didn't really mind my boobs, I just sometimes forgot they were there. My friend accidentally saw my chest and I started crying - I felt so exposed and I don't even know why I cried...
Then i cut my hair short for the first time. I liked that my mom said that I looked like a boy and wanted to fit into that. (This is how I REALLY started questioning myself, before that I was just like... confused without knowing what's wrong).
But I always corrected people and told them I am a girl.. eventhough i presented myself as a boy as a child and never ever wanted to wear dresses.
With my short haircut It feels weird to weir women's clothing, it's like dressing in drag or something....
I came out to my parents when I was about thirteen, but they told me 'it was just a phase'. It sucks. And it sucks even more bc I live in Russia and nearly everebody is homophobic so I can't transition.But I am lucky to have supportive friends who help me and who are the only reason I am still alive. I work really hard in school to be able to become an exchange student later. Hope it works because I can't live like that anymore. Dysphoria really kills me lately, I can't even leave the house. I probably need help
R Dash be kind to yourself and don't rush in to thinking that transition is the only solution. I transitioned and it was completely the wrong thing. If you ask any woman she will tell you she hates part of her body. for example hating your breasts does not necessarily mean you are trans or that transition will be the right thing for you. consider other options such as being non gender conforming. another thing is have a break from the trans bubble and focus on other things. The Internet and youtube can make it seem like trans stuff is everywhere and everything. be kind to yourself xxx
Oh god the gas station situation. I had the exact same thing happen in CVS picking up a prescription. The pharmacist called me over as Sir and then I realized I would have to give him my I.D. with my birth name to get my meds - fuck. He corrected himself when I spoke and he saw my I.D. and I felt like utter shit.
I pass most of the time lately unless I have to talk, which I guess sometimes helps with my dysphoria. I know sign language, so honestly sometimes (around strangers) I will pretend to be mute and just gesture or sign. Whatever works, right?
Being pre everything sucks. Sometimes you just feel like you won't ever get to dress as yourself or be on hormones or get the parts you should have. It does get frustrating and overwhelming. Doubt I'll ever be able to come out.
I'm in such a bad place right now.....I've already been waiting for my first appointment at the gender clinic for 8 months, the thought of having to face this body for 1.5 or 2 years is killing me
Y'all were cute and stayed cute despite the masc4mascness like okay what the hell OK goodbye
chase, you described every emotion I feel right now!!! I want to cry so bad. ty, you as well with the mirrors. I had bariatric surgery cuz I was so fuckin fat. I get mis gendered too. I hate the Shit with the Gas Station cuz that's happened to me. thank you so much chase and ty. I've been so confused depressed and dealing with anxiety. I gotta have someone to talk to.
Wow I love watching your videos! Getting all these info. Just a little thing that bothered me in this video was your hair. I loved those curls :)
Hey. I don't know if you remember me but we used to go to church together I was a little younger an you hung out with my sister Lexxi Thurstenson more.. (I was suzie) anyways I look up to you an miss you! I havn't seen you in forever and wanna catch up! Anyways please Reply x)
Hello! Thank you, of course I remember you :) how are you doing?
I'm good! Hey um when are you getting your Top surgery done? I wanted to give you some money but I wanted to know like when's the dead line lol
Oh wow thank you! I'm going to try to have it at the end of this year! You're so sweet!
Awesome okay! I'll probably give it to your cousin LT.
+Ty Turner oh Ty where I live.... we don't have transpeople I've spent year locking my feelings away & if I tell anyone here my feelings they bully my & my parents tried to send me to a shrink! I didn't like that at all so that's when I stopped showing people my emotions ! now when I smile on people around sprawood think I'm crazy.... the next harle quin some might say & I still do like talking about feeling but I do feel like ur videos r helping me out! I now I can't live my life to please others but no one understands me thank u for helping me through some tough times....
I don't think I could ever describe what dysphoria feels like better than you two did. It's just like an itch you can't scratch, and it makes me uncomfortable and moody and sad ugh it sucks. I'm not even out to my parents yet so being misgendered constantly sucks. But you know what? I'm taking your advice. One day I will finally get to be me.
why do mtf have to take t blockers but ftm don't have to take e blockers?
Im a pre t, 15 year old, guy, and only out to my best friend as trans. I've been suicidal before for other reasons and have other mental issues so I really dont know what feelings are me being dysphoric or me being mentally ill. I only know its dysphoria when I start having a serious mental breakdown about not being a guy. I might be out to my friend but Im scared of not being or acting like a real guy and people will tell me I'm faking or something.
Im just very suicidal right now, and its worse cause I dont even know if its because Im trans or something else. What if Im not even trans? What if Im just sUPER insecure about myslelf so I want to be a guy? I have no idea.
I sometimes just cry when talking about this subject... My mum made me go to the gp the other day and I cried there :/ I look online at all of these things but my mum always says, you shouldn't even think about this at your age' when I was younger I subconsciously would play with toys and pretend I was a boy...
Luckily my voice sounds quite masculine and when I'm in public I get happy when I'm called male pronouns... but then my mum just says, oh, no she's a girl.... ughhhh
:)
Hello ty turner i've watch some your videos i met u with steph and i like u, let me tell you this is the first time i chase a ftm guy cause i'm a mtf lady and i thought ftm guys did not suffer as mtf do but now i know we are like thanks to educate ppl about us. bye kisses from my channel.
Hey, I know this xomment is really late, but you really help me. I'm planning on coming out to my parents on the last day of school so that I can go FtM. I have super bad anxiety right now about it, I'm scared that they won't let me get T and that'll raise my anxiety even further.
You guys are awesome and thank you for the advice, but my problem is that in my country hrt is very expensive and i'm not sure if i would be able to afford it. i'm currently dealing with this pre-t dysphoria and i have the same problems with my voice, chest and name. i also have a very feminine face and it's hard to pass as a guy, and even if i pass, people think that i'm 12, although i'm almost 21. there was one time when it was dark outside and somebody called me mister and started talking to me and i was afraid to speak, because of my voice and to look him in the eyes, because of my feminine face. i'm afraid to tell somebody about this, because most people here are very closed-minded, especially my family, and they will think that i'm a freak.
Can your parents help ou with the money?
Actually, they are part of the problem. They don't know that i'm trans and they would probably disown me if they find out and i'm still financially dependant on them while in college.
Sadly, I would tell you to wait until you're financially independant, because you probably can't afford the life on the street. :(
Yeah, I already came to this conclusion...
And I feel bad about it. Perhaps you can find a job so as soon as you get out of school, you'll have money to go in an appartment and have hrt?
I cant imagine him being a girl he's so cute and handsome :)
It sucks cuz I 'm young enough to get growth hormone since I 'm here. Small but I can't get my blood taken for it cuz. Im too scared of needles so idk how im going to do t
I came out at 13 like one week ago
+Kaeli Patterson congratulations :)! It takes alot of guts
Is it better to move out before coming out?
I'm in a band with my family and I was wondering if it' better to come out before we get big or after?
Thx
They're totally against it :( I told them, and they didn't take it too well
***** I am safe, it's just that they won't agree with it, and I'm unique in this town :( which makes it harder cause no one would understand my situation.
***** Alright, thx.
I have joined some groups on Facebook and it's been helping a lot.
And I cam out to them not long ago.
My dad was okay-ish but my mom wasn't too thrilled.
But I'm still getting top surgery.
I've also made a new fb with my new name. :)
So I'm feeling pretty good
aha my name is chase and im a trans guy :) I loved this video. it really made me smile
I've been having really bad dysphoria lately and I can't handle it... I know you're not supposed to bind with ace bandages but I've been wrapping up with that do a few minutes a day. nothing serious, it helps with my dysphoria. but what really hit me today was when I saw a post saying '2 months on t' and it felt like a truck just hit me with sadness and anxiety. im still closeted because I'm super scared about coming out. any advice about coming out?
hey man dont bind with ace bandages no matter how tempting it is, just try and buy 2 super tight (but not too tight you cant breathe) sports bras and layer them :) coming out advice is really dependent on your situation. if youre in a family situation that you think you'll be safe and you're just scared, you could try texting whichever parent you trust most, i came out to my mum that way. i pretty much just sent her a text saying hey mum im transgender could i please get a haircut but dont talk to me about it in real life love you, and she responded really well and it was way easier for me to text it to her than try and talk about it in real life! stay strong bro you'll get there
7 months for testosterone? Wow! Here in England you can wait up to 3/4 years for your first appointment at a Gender Identity Clinic :/
Chase, do you still live in Montreal today? I'm in Montreal :) Parles-tu français? :D I'm curious, how is it in Quebec for trans people? I'm cis, and I'd like to say it's super open here, but I have no idea how open it is for trans guys.
Hey Tyler, I'm Skylar. I'm new to your channel. I have came out to only my parents and a few people. I have a lot of questions because I'm not really informed. But like, when you were pre-T which bathroom did you use? I'm 16 and I'm in highschool. I get really bad anxiety around people... And I try to talk as low as possible and I don't ever use the girls bathroom bc the looks of I get, and I don't go in the males bathrooms bc everyone identifies me as a girl. I also hate it when people call me by my birth name and use female pronouns, but for some reason I guess I'm scared to come out and tell them I'm a boy and I'm trans. And I can't really ask anyone else because they don't understand the situation. Also I'm curious on the top and bottom surgery and the type of Testosterone and how to start the process of transitioning. So can you please help me?
Tyler looks like beck hams son cute xxx
Brooklyn and yeah he does!!
How often do you have to take testosterone?
Is it daily weekly monthly?
Depends
But not daily
Transfem here, and cool video, like very informative.
but you can start your transison when your 12
I PASSED YESTERDAY AY pre-T :( my dad won't let me til 18+
Jasper Australia is really bad
You are awesome for sharing your experiences with dysphoria. It gives me strength to get through my own transition and all of the difficulties that come along with it. You have both inspired me to start a blog and a TH-cam channel to spread transgender awareness (starting with my friends and family who are genuinely interested in knowing more about my life and transition). If you are interested you can check it out: jordanpegasus.com/.
Recently I worked as a pizza cook and one of my managers who knew I was trans (all the managers had talked about it in a meeting and I had asked her multiple times to use male or gender neutral pronouns) correctly gendered me as male in front of a new employee, and then corrected it to "she" a moment later. It blew my mind that after being out for months at work and having it seem like she was getting the hang of using gender neutral or masculine pronouns, she would actually revert back to calling me by feminine pronouns. I ended up having such bad panic after that that I couldn't face coming back in for work the next day. I was so full of adrenaline and it was extremely difficult for me to focus in class and relax when I needed to at night. That was all a few weeks ago, and I have since started on testosterone injections and started a new job where I am constantly reminding people to use masculine pronouns. I'm hoping my voice deepens very soon, because I've always hated the sound of my voice. Being misgendered is an everyday struggle for me, but I have noticed that a lot of people really admire my courage in demanding respect at the workplace and at school.
I consider myself male, I want to get a deeper voice, I don't want boobs, but I don't want to go through HRT...
Mainly because I hate needles, I could never get the guts to stick a needle into my thigh.
XD lol thanks friend
Adam Thompson There are alternatives to the needle. There's a pill (not recommended long term, liver damage risk is high), patch, implant and gel as far as I'm aware. Injection is just most common.
Divine Light Yes, I do realize that. I'm nervous about the gel cause people touching me and it can get on them and stuff I've heard
I'll probably most likely go with the patch then hopefully.
If I'm lucky enough to even go through HRT, and top surgery.
Adam Thompson Yeah i've heard that can be an issue with the gel. Depends who, where and how often you touch people. So if you're regularly hugging kids and people who don't want to have any testosterone effects, that may not be the best option. I wish you the best of luck though!
Divine Light Thanks!
Fuck.
Yesterday I tried ignoring my transness. Doesn't work.
I'm dysphoric but when the dysphoria lessens my doubts start coming back again.
Yesterday felt terrible.
I hate my voice too BTW. It's the only reason why I can't pass. I did the bathroom test. I pass. But not if I have to speak.
no ur so far chase . sad face