Talking Back To Purity Culture is just new age purity culture
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ส.ค. 2024
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"I reject and rebuke in the name of queer Jesus" needs to be a T-shirt 🤣
if i ever make merch, thatll be on there
That would honestly be awesome!
@@ReadswithRachelexcellent, would buy :)
Jesus uses He/They pronouns and is Ace, if you think about it
Would 💯 buy that tshirt
"post-partum abortion" is a phrase that will always and forever blow my mind
it makes me rage because IT IS NOT A THING WHY ARE THEY TRYING TO MAKE FETCH HAPPEN
They see abortion as a stand in for 'killing babies' so it makes perfect sense to them. It doesn't matter what the word means or what reality is. They are trying to make abortion sound scary in any way they can for their followers and scare the people who aren't equipped to unpack what they are doing. They have their own unique language and they take and twist words like this on purpose. It really is mind blowing and frustrating to see.
@@ReadswithRachel I assume in this context she's linking these possibly imaginary historical men deciding whether to "post-partum abort" the female children with the modern feminism and pro-choice movements which she knows her target audience have already been (falsely) told want to legalise post-partum abortion, hence saying feminism and pro-choice are actually the ones being regressive and patriarchal while she and her "new" purity culture friends are the ones who care about the safety and agency of women and girls.
It's a deliberate language choice consistent with her "p*rn inherently promotes the objectification and subjugation of women" and "so grateful for my openly same-sex attracted friends and their amazing choice to respect themselves and god" takes.
She's trying to be the "woke" purity culture by drawing positive parallels between her affirmations and the appeal of modern feminist ideals (girl power, not being openly hateful, and ???), while drawing negative ones between "old" purity culture and what she asserts, or at least implies, are harmful parts of feminism (sex positivity, reproductive choice, "selfishness" and "vanity").
It's carefully calculated to position her fundie Christian beliefs as the reasonable, healthy middle ground between two violent and regressive ideologies, rather than the friendlier face of an outdated extremist ideology that's losing more and more public support and membership as feminism and LGBTQIA+ acceptance make greater cultural inroads. Pretty much in line with the wave of GirlBoss Christian influencers
“Post-partum abortion” and it’s literally murder
Makes me thing of a Donald Trump tweet, where he said that the democrats want abortion just before the birth and even after.
If I had a nickel for every time I heard the “sex is like fire” analogy growing up I’d be so rich.
same
I have never heard that and it makes me think I was lucky in that way
If someone told me that, I would just assume that their "sexually pure" spouse must have given them the clap.
Why does this sound like the perfect description of a sex party?
I’m pretty sure I heard this analogy in health class. In public school. Right along with the teacher tearing a sheet of paper and asking the class “how can I fix this this?” and showing how each method of ‘fixing’ it still left it broken and unusable.
(Side note: a year later my history teacher tried to use the paper analogy to explain the Civil War and how the nation was never the same again after the War.
A lot of us girls were very freaked out when he first tore that sheet in half.)
The title seems perfect to me. "Talking Back to Purity Culture," as in "Talking [You] Back [in]to Purity Culture."
Exactly.
As a pagan poly lesbian, I am literally this women’s worst nightmare. And I’m glad I am. No one is broken, this is terrible. If you, as an individual choose to not have sex that is your choice, and you should feel free to do so. And I don’t care what anyone says, purity balls are the creepiest thing.
Ooh, I'm a non-binary pagan and homoflexible/sapphic, glad to be this woman's nightmare as well :)
@@floreya67 Hello fellow nightmare, hail and well met!
Read that as "pagan holy lesbian" and it felt right.
@@junebunchanumbers hahahaha
Dang, this is like GASLIGHT, GATEKEEP, GIRLBOSS, but make it Jesusy. Also, I tell you, these purity types (especially the dude who wrote the intro) are the most sex-obsessed people I've ever seen.
#feminis--actuallynoiibelieveabusersneeddignitytoo
Usually obsessed with teenagers' sex life. I wish, they realised how weird and creepy they are being.
100%
But also, the internet has ruined me, I read that as Jesussy and can't stop picturing that now lmao
Well, I thought I had enough distance from my own traumatic evangelical upbringing to watch this, but we hit the first Bible verse and I have to dip. But I'm glad you're talking back to "Talking Back to Purity Culture". The alternate title could be Purity Culture: second verse same as the first only a whole lot louder and a whole lot worse. Lol.
Thank you for sticking it out as long as you could 💕 A+ on that alternatate title
🤯 Escaped fundy here, in recovery 18 years (as long as I was in). I used to have this experience in Church:
The pastor would be going along, and suddenly the words coming out of his mouth just....stopped making sense. It would pick up a second later, and I figured it was just me. Then I assumed Autism was to blame, bc I got dxed.
I was TODAY years old when I learned it wasn't the Autism! At 34:30 you quoted the author, and the words stopped making sense...and resumed a few words later. I slowed it and listened five times, before hearing the weird twist in rhetoric. Mind blown.
As soon as she mentioned unmarried cohabitation I knew she supported purity culture because if sex is fine before marriage then what’s wrong with an unmarried couple living together, huh?🤔
I'm a lesbian who grew up christian, I've heard this same shit my whole life. It took a long time to accept my sexuality because of this. My mom was supportive and often hinted at the fact she knew I was gay, but even though I had long since realized I was an atheist and separated from the church, this was still in my head. I had been told these morals for so much of my life that I couldn't distinct it from my own morals, my own voice. Despite the fact I had support and was told it was ok, I still couldn't accept who I was and I hated myself.
Now that I'm completely separated from the church, these things anger me to a terrifying degree. Christians often can't see outside of the church. Any morals have to go through the church, any belief, any opinions, they all have to align with the church. When you identify with something you can twist yourself to fit the mold. And the more you dive into the identity the less you can see the outside. And the fact they assign "goodness" to this identity makes it so anyone who doesn't identify as it or can't fit the mold is inherently not "good". When someone is bad and other you often can feel less empathy for them, "they did it to themselves", "they deserve it". And that is why when you're in the church you often can't see this, because they are the other, they are the bad, and you feel that lack of empathy for them.
It's a process to try and identify these influences in myself, often I find myself slipping up. But now, that I'm trying everyday to be kinder and more empathetic to everyone, I feel like a more complete person than I ever did with the church.
Oof this resonates deeply with me and I just wanna give you a huge hug
"Postpartum abortion".....Sooo murder?...that's called murder.
I grew up Mormon and it's fascinating to me the amount of overlap between Mormonism and various evangelical and fundamentalist sects. A surprising amount of the things you quoted I've heard almost word for word growing up. I've especially noticed these similarities amongst the women. I feel like they all frequent the same pintrest boards lmao.
I was shocked as I got older to find out how much I had in common with Mormons!
Same. I went to an evangelical school as a Mormon.
ugh, it's so frustrating that when we think we'll get a book by a christian that's actually criticizing purity culture, this is what we get. I WANT TO GET RID OF PURITY CULTURE, RACHEL JOY, NOT REBRAND IT!
(I DIED with the alternate titles you gave at the start)
WHY DOES THIS HAVE SO FEW VIEWS??????????
Hi. I'm listening to this and I'm only at 18 mins in, but WOW. I'm an ace lesbian who grew up in the midst of the "I kissed dating goodbye", Captivating, Wild at Heart, yadda yadda, didn't know I was queer, didn't know I was ace (why would I when I was taught to flee from sin? I just figured that my disinterest in sex was me being realllyyyy good at fleeing from sin). I'm gonna send this to a couple of friends who grew up in purity culture and we're only just now starting to unpack the trauma it left in us. Thanks for this video
also here is my purple heart in the comment
Thank you so much for supporting! Working on the p rn video notes as we speak.
Imma start calling my anxiety attacks "LGBT+ concerns" 😂
“I’m not wrestling (with SSA) I’m just sitting pretty” made me so happy. Relatable 😅❤
This needs to be on a shirt
Went to Catholic school through 8th grade and am still unlearning things at 30. Had no clue asexuality was a possibility until I was 28, up until then I assumed something was profoundly wrong with me. As a teenager I had no interest in any of that but figured marriage, sex, and kids were something I’d have to force myself to do and I’d end up being happy in the end. Thankfully, I didn’t do any of that. But even though I haven’t so much as kissed someone in over 10 years, purity culture still sits in the depths of my brain. Just because I’m ace doesn’t mean my body doesn’t still do things sometimes, and the gross things adults taught me about how filthy those feelings are still creep in. Not to mention the ol “already chewed piece of gum” analogy us girls were taught at school.
Well, I was raised Catholic and asexuals can be single and that is fine.
This! All of this! And I went to a Catholic All-Girl's high school as well. It was there that I started to question my interest, or lackthereof, of sex since I felt I didn't have to "fight" over any boy. I am forever grateful that my other half accepts me being Ace and is willing to let me explore what I am interested in.
"This is gonna be a long one" Long Rachel videos are the best, and oddly relaxing. Thanks Rachel!!!!
As a pan Ace kid “ purity culture” was technically “easy” for me because I didn’t want to have s** anyways. However, it still left me feeling broken. Because I wasn’t actively fighting in the way it claimed I should be. In the 90’s nobody had words for things like we do now. And I wouldn’t have been taught them anyway. So I had no idea that how I felt was completely normal.
Mostly what I’m trying to say is, weather you are absent or not, purity culture is harmful.
Dude, why is this me??? I mean, at least this was in the 2010s so once I turned 18 and was allowed on the internet and outside the house I could learn what asexuality was. And thank God that it took me until I was 21 to figure out I was biromantic, because that way I suffered less as a teenager. But still.
"There's nothing wrong with you. You're just gay." Love this
This video was very well made. You were very clear and eloquent and I am very impressed. I am always left with having learned so much from your videos and I truly enjoy them and greatly appreciate all the work you do.
Wow, thank you!
I know how much this book hurt you to get through & I just wanna thank you for & recognize all the emotional labor you've done for this 💜💜💜
(I hope you're reading more enjoyable things now lol)
Rachel, I'm so sorry you grew up with this shit. I was lucky to grow up Buddhist/spiritual, but I still felt the effects of societal 'purity' and that already creeped me out enough, I cannot imagine how you felt doing this video. Thank you as always for tackling the bullshit, and defending us queers. 💚 Love your attitude towards these topics.
I almost want to make a drinking game out of every time you say "I can't believe we need to have this discussion in 2022," or some variation thereof. 😅
I was president of an "unofficial gender and sexuality discussion group" (closest thing we could have to an LGBTQ club) at my conservative college. We talked a LOT about Side A, Side B, and Side X. I've never heard of Side Y, but Side X is called that to reference the "eX-gay" mindset - it's summed up in one sentence as "pray away the gay" and is the camp associated with conversion therapy.
Meanwhile, generally, the Side B camp would say that people experiencing "SSA" and not feeling attraction to anyone "appropriate" was called by God to be single and serve the church in different ways from married couples or families.
always appreciate your very in depth reviews. 💜 hope your next project is more enjoyable. Always blows my mind to hear stories of queer people growing up in fundie backgrounds. Can’t imagine dealing with the kind of ‘side B’ insidious homophobia all the time
At 14:18 you hit the nail on the head. This is exactly my point and I love that you also expanded on it. I have never heard a more accurate quote or explanation. You deserve a gold medal 🥇.
Talking Back to Purity Culture - and Telling it to Keep Doing What It's Doing, but With A Fresher Coat of Paint.
I'm 5 minutes in and this is some of the most blatant and unapologetic bait-and-switching I've seen, and I've watched your videos on Jessie Minassian.
Authors like these know that people can and do read what's inside these books before they buy them, right?
I love SO many of the things you said. Two of the things that really broke my shelf was trying to find a valid reason for modesty standards and the framing of queerness as SSA!! Thank you for calling out this kind of rhetoric
OHMYGOD NOT FIGHT THE NEW DRUG LMAOOO i can't believe i used to use that as a source when i identified with mormonism
NOOOOOOOOOO
Sex was of the hardest things for me to deal with growing up fundie was purity culture. I was very horny, I had fantasies about both men and women, and I was also very aro/ace. I also had no view in sexual health because it was seen as shameful for me to so much as show my midriff, and my parents’ sex Ed was basically to let school give me their limited version and then make me take the initiative to ask for more info. I could never understand why porn, masturbation, or queerness was bad, and I didn’t feel safe to even ask because of the church’s insular rhetoric. The only times being “against purity culture” came up was in regards to “welcoming” people who weren’t cishet virgins to repent or saying not to be “prideful” about being purer than other Christians. That sort of aversion to conversations and discourse and actually learning and improving our church is what led me to leaving Christianity, because I could no longer see a world where I could be a person and still be in the church.
The *only* good “talking back” to purity culture I’ve seen from Christians was from God is Grey during the time I was getting out of evangelical fundie thought. It’s basically the idea that being “sexually pure” has nothing to do with virginity of marriage (she herself had a child before being married and is makes a point that virginity is a made up construct) but God wants people to be pure by prioritizing respect and consent in sex. The importance isn’t on not having sex but having it in a godly way where the autonomy, wants, pleasure, boundaries, and needs of your partner are met. Of course that’s just healthy sex, even from a secular perspective, and people can argue that religion doesn’t belong in the conversation, but it’s still a very healthy view on sex from a Christian perspective. She’s helping Christians who care about following the Bible’s commands by showing that following them doesn’t mean denying yourself happiness or shaming others. She also has a very positive relationship with the queer community. What I’m saying is that the people who came to this book looking for a refutation of purity culture or a Christian alternative to purity culture should check out God is Grey.
Hey Rachel. Have you done a video on Abby Johnson or her book Unplanned? This book as well as her social media presence holds so much sway w/ Christians and she made me become an angry pro-lifer for quite a while. I would be hella excited if you did discuss her on here.
Hi! So I had talked about her a bit when i did a video on crisis pregnancy centers. She actually has me blocked on instagram for calling out falsehoods she posts. I'm happy to read her book and do a video calling out her nonsense!
@@ReadswithRachel Have you made a video on Abby Johnson's Unplanned yet?
This is the second video of yours I've watched, and I am now a proud subscriber. If you happen to see this, I would love to get some recommendations for LGBTQ books for a teenager. My oldest child is part of the community and I have had a hard time finding books that address being a gay teenager and all the struggles that go with that. They have recently been struggling after we moved to a small town that is not very accepting. Not only that, but when they came out to my family they were not met with kindness by everyone. So if you have any suggestions (particularly being lesbian or non-binary), I would love to hear them. The only one I've been able to find so far is Jay's Gay Agenda.
FAITH!!! Say no more IVE GOT YOU I will whip this video up this month
I couldn't watch this video because the part where you're reading from her book four minutes in gives me so much anxiety based on the way I grew up in purity culture 😅 (also you know what's fun? looking up the actual greek that's translated as "sexual immorality" and realizing it likely has absolutely nothing to do with premarital sex, homosexuality, or anything that fundies tell you it means....)
I have a looot of thoughts about p*rn and modern sex positive feminism. Would love a discussion vid 💜
Sex is like fire...it can hurt your butt. :(
Girl! I’m so glad I broke away from the church and all it’s doctrines. Even as a teenager I question all that shite and as soon as I was old enough to decide for myself that I was done? I rolled! Peace out bitches! ✌🏽 And I haven’t looked back! Do I believe in God? Sure, but what the Bible says? Nope. Too many MEN had their hands in that book and its translations I trust NOTHING about that version of God. I said what I said. No judgment against folks who choose to follow it, it’s not for me. I respect their choice to live that way and all I ask is they give me the same courtesy. Live and let live. I agree with you 💯 on this topic! 🙌🏽🙌🏽
I question the "ally in faith" part, what if the woman isn't Christian? That line reads to me as "don't assault Christian women, everyone else doesn't matter". To me that just gives abusers and assaulters more room to make up excuses and avoid accountability, which is the exact opposite on what we're trying to do to stop sexual assault
If ppl like this author thinks my queerness is an affliction. ..maybe they'll think it's like a virus and they'll stay away from me bc they might just catch all my gay. 😉
15:00 THANK YOU for putting it into words. I fell out of Christianity for a number of reasons, but this was a big one. It feels so validating to have someone understand why a relationship with the Christian god (at least the evangelical version) would be toxic.
I didnt grow up with it hammered down my throat, and honestly as far as sex ed goes I think my teachers did a good job focusing on safety and protection over abstinence. That being said, we come from a generation where purity culture was everywhere. I didn't realize how much it traumatized me until I lost my virginity. I was 27 and told myself it was time and I was ready but even then I felt like a lost something I can't get back. I often look back on it and feel guilty even though there is no reason I should. I can only imagine it's 100 times worse for people who was force fed this crap.
My issue with purity culture is that I didn't realize I was Ace until I got into college. I wasn't just waiting for "Mr. Right"/my future husband, I just wasn't interested in having sex, period.
Purity Culture is such a fucking weird concept to me. I was raised in Reform Judaism, and purity culture just isn't really a thing for us (which I am very grateful for, considering I coped with my SA by being very hypersexual as a teen.) I don't know if it exists in more Orthodox forms of Judaism, though if it does, I imagine it exists differently, as I do know that in at least some Orthodox communities, the men are also expected to meet a standard of modesty, not just women. So seeing it from an outside perspective, Christian Purity Culture seems absolutely bonkers. Like, who thought this was a good idea and what drugs were they on to come to that conclusion? The first time I heard about it I was like "Wtf is going on here? Y'all good? Do you need some help" And the more I learned, the more I realized that no, people who perpetuate purity culture are not good, and yes, those subjected to it do need help. Sending all my love to those of you still dealing with the harm it caused you. Unpacking that stuff takes time, but I support and believe in you
Hi! I love your videos! I was wondering if you’d consider reading and reviewing ‘We all fall down’ By Rosa Szabo, I’ve heard it’s extremely controversial and many have questioned how it even got published. Just picture a very white person writing a queer fantasy in southern America and having their white queer mc blame a crime on a black queer man and then writing that man as the villian 😟
Hey, so I actually did read it lol I wanna say maybe 6-8 weeks ago I finished the arc, and honestly I just found it so weird and convoluted I had no idea how to even review it
@@ReadswithRachel That’s completely valid tbh. I haven’t read it myself but friends have and honestly the whole premise had me sat there wondering who the fuck would write this. Convoluted is absolutely right.
i'll go back over my notes and see if i have enough for a video!
How did I watch all the Avengers movies and .iss the fact that Jesus was in them 🤣🤣🤣
he was the hero all along
He was cleverly disguised as America’s Ass
They wish. In their mind, Jesus looks like Captain America and they dont see how that means, they are prioritising their secular culture, ideals and values about masculinity over how Jesus is actually described in the Bible.
I audibly GASPED at how poorly 37:10 has aged… citing RUSSELL BRAND as an example in your book about sex, given the recent allegations against him, is certainly a choice 👁__👁
I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS LIKE AN HOUR AGO
As a pansexual person in her forties I grew up in the closet because of this religious bullshit. I left Christianity when I was 18, however I didn’t publicly come out until 6 years ago because of self loathing because of this trauma. Being queer is hard enough…
I love, that as a culture feminists' message is still: "women are people". Jesus wept.
/s.
Still considering changing your name in my phone to Beloved Rachel
Ma’am I will disown you
@@ReadswithRachel you could never
“I’d prefer it not be holy…” 😂 Actually I think you nailed that joke!!!! 😅
"Repression Repackaged" would be an appropriate title.
💜
3:38 God is an Avenger? Wow! 😮 Was he Team Stark or Team Cap? 😂
I was brought up in a purity culture I wish that they focused on what was a healthy relationship from a secular point of view. Instead of promoting virginity, and purity. I learned about healthy relationships from a college class that I took, it was from a secular point of view, and I stopped agreeing with purity culture after.
I can see a way the "sex is like fire" simile could be used in a less harmful context. Because sex can be dangerous, what with STIs and unwanted pregnancy. So for having sex and handling fire, you have to learn how to do it SAFELY. Once you know how to be safe, you're free to go off and have as much or as little sex as you choose, as long as the proper precautions are taken. Also, much like sex, fire can be absolutely beautiful. So yeah, sex being like fire isnt an inherently harmful concept, Scott Saul just used it in the worst way.
As someone who was forced to go to church from the time they could walk and finally got to break the tether at 18 when I was legally an adult, all of this is stuff I still struggle with at 30 years old. I had this kind of stuff drilled into my head from the time I was five. Even now, I do something that "isn't pure" or something I wasn't taught in the church, I feel guilt of some kind and it's awful. This whole book is just a giant ball of shit.
On a more lighthearted note: Those names you gave at the beginning were GOLD 😂
BIG YIKES on the pornography thing. consuming porn is not morally fallible. of course, i think people should be open to placing and respecting boundaries in monogamous relationships, but that is a personal thing and lots of people are 100% okay with freely consuming porn. the real problem with porn is not sex being immoral, but the industry. you can still 100% support sex workers and the production of porn, without supporting a misogynistic, unregulated, male lead industry, that often leads sex workers into vulnerable and compromising (even nonconsensual) situations. i feel like people should focus more on how they can support sex workers and how they can help create a safer industry, not on how "evil" pornography is. pornography isn't the problem. like all things, be an informed buyer. do research on what websites you use and what content you're consuming. the safest option is always directly supporting a content creator through things like patreon. but also, i guess i'm biased as a sex worker, and i don't expect an author who is just regurgitating purity culture to understand the nuances of pornography and sex work.
Good video overall, this isn’t even a repackaging but literally just taking purity culture, putting it behind a curtain for a few seconds, then pulling it back out and saying it’s something new.
I wasn’t initially familiar with the “sides” you referred to in this video but did look them up, apparently the definitions are kind of fuzzy. The originals were “Side A, B, and X” but some people split off “Side Y” from “Side B” in which “Side B” are accepting of “gay” terminology and “Side Y” aren’t, and “Side Y” are somewhat welcoming to conversion “therapy”. It’s splitting hairs though, in practical terms there’s little difference between “Side B” and “Side Y”. For reference, I’m a “Side A” proud LGBT Christian.
An interesting topic related to this that you kinda touched on at the end is the laundering of anti-porn/anti-masturbation stuff from conservative Christian/Mormon organizations like Fight the New Drug by secular organizations and individuals. A lot of this happens through “bro-science” stuff targeted at young men like the Nofap “movement” and the late Gary Wilson (who’s a sexual predator, incidentally) but recently there’s been a lot of “porn addiction” rhetoric among Gen Z kids on social media, which tries to paint any engagement with erotic or pornographic content as “addiction” in much the same way that Christian purity culture does.
MODERN PREGNANCY?????? Pregnancy isn't a modern thing..... it's been around for 2000+ years eh?
This is fascinating. It seems like this person is trying to turn purity culture into something progressive in the same way misogynists have been trying to gaslight people into seeing misogyny as feminism.
💜💜💜💜💜
if someone asserts that chastity is somehow more countercultural and less accepted than polyamory i know instantly that their viewpoint is skewed beyond belief by a sense of persecution that does not exist
Sexual abuse is about power. Absolutely.
Idc what god thinks he's just gonna have to deal with it
The way I was raised we were told that the only way to be a Christian is so be accepting and loving of everyone. We weren't told we'd go to hell for being gay. We were saved if we accepted the lord as our savior. I'm no longer a Christian but I do feel lucky to have been raised with such beliefs.
Part of me is curious about what the author would think about me. I(30f) am a sex-repulsed ace who is a virgin and wants to stay that way, at least for the foreseeable future. I don't fight anything because I don't experience sexual attraction. Does that mean that, in her eyes, I win at life? 😂
"she's an ally in your faith" uh she probably doesn't realize it but she's basically just saying "you don't have to respect women of other/no religion"
I'm sat in the living room with my family, listening to this on headphones and I just yelled out "OH FUCK OFF!" and scared the whole family. And we're not even on the book yet, it's the blurb.
I wasn't raised religious but I did grow up in Utah deep amongst the Mormons and they are huge on purity but without the hellfire. I distinctly remember 8th grade health class and the Mormon teacher offering the entire class purity bracelets that she sealed closed on kids' wrists for their future spouses to cut off on their wedding night. Myself and one other girl in a class of 30 something kids were the only ones that didn't hop up to get the bracelets.
Utah Mormons are also valiantly fighting the war on pornography, not the prescription pill problem Utah has (including a large number of Mormons), the alleged porn problem.
The issue isn’t porn it’s the toxic masculinity that was created by Christianity and its “men are superior” hierarchy.
Sometimes I think the world would be a much better place if the Bible had never existed.
Honestly Christianity is not the only ideology that teaches that. There are Atheists who believe that too. Religion is just more effective at making it look " respectable" which it is anything but....
Could just have been a typo of “Taking Back Too: Purity Culture”
Going by that scripture it says no sexual immorality not don't have sex. That is so subjective.
💜💜💜💜
Being nosy...this has a 4 and half star rating on Amazon. Blows my mind that anyone thinks this way. You're right, it's about control. Always has been.
14:38 BOOM. there it is
💜💜💜💜💜💜
oh yeah, purity culture is definitely where my cnc kink came from
I get the impression that the author is desperately trying to justify the purity culture she grew up with by speaking in circles around it so that she can view it in a way that is acceptable to her. And she's failing, that's why she keeps contradicting herself and saying essentially the same things she learned from purity culture, just in different words that sound better to her
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I know my view point on this subject is probably ... different from most but the whole idea of women getting "late term abortions" or "post-partum abortions" or "past the point of viability abortions", etc. as a reason to restrict our (the US and/or western world) access to abortion just pisses me the fuck off because, you know what? They do actually happen. They happen a shit ton, but they don't happen here. The argument is so disgusting to me. These happen in China, India, and other cultures that heavily favor men. It's happened so much that it's skewed the global birth rate ratio. You know how many women, in the modern era, have had to be killed to skew the global ratio?
And then these people come along and try to pick up what is similar to a female genocide, and try to use that to *control* women in other parts of the world. Like, wtf man?
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God it makes me angry how hateful and cruel these people are to *children* just for being unique human beings with different wants and needs, etc.
I am a non-binary, panromantic, asexual person on the autism spectrum dealing with mental illness. I am afraid of how I would be viewed in christian culture. I went to a catholic elementary school, which was already a nightmare and living a a small conservative town, which sucked on so many levels......but purity culture, old or repackaged can go suck eggs in hell (to quote a gay pirate).
i had a religion teacher go on a Pilgimage in dedication of the priests during the Pgh sexual abuse scandals... she said that to several rooms of high schoolers with a straight face
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i wasn't raised in any church, so my only knowledge of Jesus is from sunday school i attended with a friend, and the timeless classic of a musical Jesus Christ Superstar. my pagan faith considers Jesus a 'prophet' - like any other person who came to earth to spread love and acceptance. but i always thought he was into Mary Magdalen. like, i can't fathom the idea that a man in his 30s wouldn't at least crush on someone? and yes, he's holy and all that, but so are all of us? that's the idea, right? we're all vessels of light or whatever. perfect as we are. so if Jesus wanted to be with Mary before he was executed by the Romans, he should have had at it. i'm rambling, but my point is this: Jesus was a good man, but that's all he was, right? son of god? sure, cuz we're all children of god. or the gods. we're all holy and perfect. just as we are. so the idea that we need to avoid 'sin' is gross to me. sex isn't sinful. being queer isn't sinful. none of that shit is. in my faith we say 'an it harm none, do as you will.' - if you're not hurting anyone, do what you want. and i think that's perfect. me being a sexually active, unmarried, bisexual pagan hurts no one. i'm doing my thing, keeping my own council and trying to make the world a better place. I wish these 'Christians' would stop trying to police other people's lives and focus inward for a moment. though i'm not sure it would change anything.
If you want to read fetishization of purity, read anything by Robin Jones Gunn. Everyone who gets married is given slutty lingerie with a robe so on their wedding night, they are wrapped as a gift to the husband for whom they’ve saved for themselves. The book that starts with purity rings ends with the marriage of the guy who hasn’t even kissed someone because he is saving EVERYTHING for marriage. The main character of her most popular series talks about the wedding night like angels are throwing glitter all over her and that it is SO MUCH BETTER because she saved herself. Oh, and she writes sex into her books with phrases about a long afternoon of “this-is-what-married-people-do.” So laughable.
Oh my goodness....Robin Jones Gunn, what a blast from the past. Gosh her writing was so toxic!!! And yet I read them as a tween and got so many ideas from them ....
I have four hand painted little boxes of "letters to my future husband" I wrote from like middle school through college... finally cracked them open on my bachelorette night with my maid of honor and had a very cringey laugh 😂 The Christy Miller series and spinoffs had a chokehold on me back in high school
Wow that's all kinds of creepy
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