THANK YOU Kailin for addressing such an important topic, I have always been a people pleaser (especially in dating) and tried to shift, change and chase just in order to please... For me scripting and working on my self concept really helped to put myself on the pedestal. In the end we all have only this one life and we should ALWAYS prioritize my own needs. I highly believe now what is meant to be will stick and bending backwards is not for me anymore. Btw I love your content, best wishes from Austria! ❤
Something that helped me being less of a people pleaser, sadly, is getting sick… I noticed that when I was at my worst no one helped me like I would have done for them, I wanted love and attention and I got cast aside and abandoned. Now that I am truely getting better I have confronted some of those people, they always have a good excuse of why they didn’t help me ofc… Once I understood that I was the only one that could fully care about myself I learned to care less about other people’s approval Thank you for your lovely video Kailin, kisses from France as always xx 🫶🏼💕
Kaitlin, This is an amazing video and I needed it my life in my 20”s. I have been a people pleaser all my life, to the determined of me. I have got a lot better with some therapy. But recently I have under gone a problem that has truly floored me. My son and his wife moved in with us for nearly a year. Both my husband and I are very easy going and made them very welcome. Made extra room for them like their own fridge in the garage cupboard in the kitchen and of course their own bedroom. I had it decorated and new furniture and curtains shortly before they moved in. I alway got on with his wife, but I did do a lot of running around which I did willingly. The problem came when she left a mess everywhere. Old food months old in the fridge her stuff all over the dinning room table. We could not eat at the dinning room table for months. One day when I was not very well the entire kitchen work surfaces were covered as well and I asked my son to ask her to clear some work surface space. From that moment on she never spoke to me again. For months they lived with us with her not talking to me at all. She would pass me in the kitchen not saying anything etc. I said to my son this was unacceptable and he said she needed time but she didn’t want to talk about it as yet. Christmas Eve came and my husband and I hadn’t eaten yet ( my husband had not come home from work yet). I went into the kitchen and she the double oven on and the single oven on at the same time. She had stopped paying rent as well so was living hear rent free with no explanation. I just said to her Erin you are using all the ovens? She said is that a problem. I replied well that is very expensive. With that she turned all the ovens off and moved out with my son and I have not seen or heard of her since. Infact my son I have spoken too but only when I phone him. This is very out of character for him. He came around the other day and said I need to apologise to her. I will do for his sake, but really I don’t think I should do as I haven’t done anything wrong. We keep our house fairly clean, it’s not my fault that he has brought up with a messy mum. Please please help me as I don’t know what to do? Xx
hi, Louise! I am so sorry to hear that you're in this situation. I think communication is so important and for you to understand what went wrong. She sounds very agitated and defensive right away, so perhaps something deeper is going on that you can discuss with your son. I'd listen to their side completely, validate their feelings where you think it's necessary, and share your intentions so they can better understand you, too! ❤️
THANK YOU Kailin for addressing such an important topic, I have always been a people pleaser (especially in dating) and tried to shift, change and chase just in order to please... For me scripting and working on my self concept really helped to put myself on the pedestal. In the end we all have only this one life and we should ALWAYS prioritize my own needs. I highly believe now what is meant to be will stick and bending backwards is not for me anymore. Btw I love your content, best wishes from Austria! ❤
Sending you a big hug!! Thank you so much, this comment and your kind words mean more than you'll ever know!
Something that helped me being less of a people pleaser, sadly, is getting sick… I noticed that when I was at my worst no one helped me like I would have done for them, I wanted love and attention and I got cast aside and abandoned. Now that I am truely getting better I have confronted some of those people, they always have a good excuse of why they didn’t help me ofc… Once I understood that I was the only one that could fully care about myself I learned to care less about other people’s approval
Thank you for your lovely video Kailin, kisses from France as always xx 🫶🏼💕
we are truly the only ones that can save ourselves the most! sending you such a big hug and I appreciate you so so much xo
Your content is liberating. And of course, who is harder to please than…ourselves? ❤🔥🎯
this means a lot to me!! thank you so much ❤
Kaitlin, This is an amazing video and I needed it my life in my 20”s. I have been a people pleaser all my life, to the determined of me.
I have got a lot better with some therapy. But recently I have under gone a problem that has truly floored me. My son and his wife moved in with us for nearly a year. Both my husband and I are very easy going and made them very welcome. Made extra room for them like their own fridge in the garage cupboard in the kitchen and of course their own bedroom. I had it decorated and new furniture and curtains shortly before they moved in.
I alway got on with his wife, but I did do a lot of running around which I did willingly. The problem came when she left a mess everywhere. Old food months old in the fridge her stuff all over the dinning room table. We could not eat at the dinning room table for months. One day when I was not very well the entire kitchen work surfaces were covered as well and I asked my son to ask her to clear some work surface space. From that moment on she never spoke to me again. For months they lived with us with her not talking to me at all. She would pass me in the kitchen not saying anything etc. I said to my son this was unacceptable and he said she needed time but she didn’t want to talk about it as yet. Christmas Eve came and my husband and I hadn’t eaten yet ( my husband had not come home from work yet). I went into the kitchen and she the double oven on and the single oven on at the same time. She had stopped paying rent as well so was living hear rent free with no explanation. I just said to her Erin you are using all the ovens? She said is that a problem. I replied well that is very expensive. With that she turned all the ovens off and moved out with my son and I have not seen or heard of her since. Infact my son I have spoken too but only when I phone him. This is very out of character for him.
He came around the other day and said I need to apologise to her.
I will do for his sake, but really I don’t think I should do as I haven’t done anything wrong. We keep our house fairly clean, it’s not my fault that he has brought up with a messy mum.
Please please help me as I don’t know what to do? Xx
hi, Louise! I am so sorry to hear that you're in this situation. I think communication is so important and for you to understand what went wrong. She sounds very agitated and defensive right away, so perhaps something deeper is going on that you can discuss with your son. I'd listen to their side completely, validate their feelings where you think it's necessary, and share your intentions so they can better understand you, too! ❤️
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Did you see the book that fell behind you?
I DID!!! It was the second one that fell in the video, too! (I cut the first one out)
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