@@doctorthirteen5727 And of course starring Neil Breen as the store owner. I can picture the scene as he first discovers the state of his store. "This can't be right! This can't be right!" He falls to his knees, picking up paint-damaged stock and holding it sadly, with the rest of the store poorly green-screened behind him. Later you see him using Jamal's payphone, calling his insurance company. "This can't be right! This can't be right!" He falls to his knees, the 'phone still in his hand. The scene then cuts to a boardroom in which various executives talk exposition at each other. "This is how we keep power, denying hard-working Americans their insurance claims. Soon we will control the satellites!"
Hey, it’s Barbara Crampton. She’s been in _much_ weirder situations, trust me. I mean, just the year before, there was that whole incident with the sentient severed head....
During the Cold War, all malls in America had blast shield doors. It was part of the Star Wars defense program (as we see in Gymakata). It's less known that mall electric carts had lethal antirobot countermeasures in case of Soviet robots attacking a mall.
As someone who was in his early teens in the 80's, yes the mall was a nice place to hang out on a Friday or Saturday night. You'd meet your friends there and just wander the mall, visit the stores, grab something from the food court and hit up the arcade. Then your parents would pick you up outside when the mall closed.
In 2011-12 I’d say mall culture was on its last stretch. Saying from my own experience with the small two floor local mall located 15 minutes away from home. When I was 13 it would be packed and there were so many good stores. Now it’s 2023 and the mall is barely full with most good stores having left except for macys, dicks sporting goods, and a few big name clothing stores. Most vendors are now just private small business fillers.
Oh yeah back in the 80s and early 90s Northland Mall in Columbus Ohio was the mall to hang out at. Don't think we had any malfunctioning killer robot guarding it though.
The Mall of the Americas had the roller coaster and was just so ridiculously huge, with so many stores filled with novelty junk constantly failing, only to re-open under a new name with a new aesthetic. I mean there were toy stores that only survived off of the craze of adults buying each new toy line in the belief it would be the next Star Wars, GIJoe, Beanie Baby, etc. A Grandiose display of the obesities brought about by mass consumerism, from the 70s, into the 80s. Then the 90s tried to pre-package new things as an investment, and a future nostalgic item.
When I saw this the first time I was excited because I thought Joey was going to be one of the main character. Instead he’s just there for a blink and you’ll miss it cameo.
The mall in the opening scene in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High." Also, I miss shopping malls with bookstores. The place to be in the 80s. Arcades, food courts, and hours of window shopping for stuff you didn't need. Leg warmers, knitted skirts, jelly shoes, and actually going to a record store to shop for music. Can we bring the 80s back? I'm tired of 2020.
Sadly, malls are pretty much on their way out for good. Back in the 80’s I never would have thought that. I miss going to the record stores and arcades
I miss the 90's too, even the 00's. World's been slowly falling to shit since 2013 oddly enough... maybe the Mayans were right after all and it wasn't an immediate thing. XD
The only remnant of the original Sherman Oaks Mall is the court where the Pacific 16 Theatres is located, which are on the uppermost of what was previously the southern Robinsons-May store. The majority of the remaining mall was turned into offices.
James May's Flying Washing Machine I had just checked the channel today, to see if I’d missed a notification. It just felt like the right time for him to drop an episode of some sort.
For another mall-centric romp: Sorority Babes at the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. That movie is a whole mess of weirdness, involving an Imp that grants monkey paw wishes that aren’t plot relevant, a punk named Spider who robs mall bowling alleys, and bad Bride of Frankenstein Halloween costumes.
So I have an answer for the JAMAL scene: so I’m from NYC and back in the day people used to use pay phones as their home numbers. You could figure out the number of the phone (sometimes they were just on the phone) and you could give out the number to others. Some people would tell someone to call them at specific times knowing they would be there to answer the call. Fun little BACK IN THE DAY fact even we had pay phones lol
2 observations about this movie: I spent most of the 80s hanging around malls and gun stores. I don't care what Chopping Mall or Dawn of The Dead say, there are no gun stores in malls. And: ANY woman who can run, jump, crawl, fall, hide, and fight while concealing a road flare in her boobs is a true hero and that's why Kelli Maroney is awesome and able to survive the Night of the Comet.
I live in West Virginia and there is a dunham's sporting goods in our mall. Guns ammo and survival gear and pretty much everything you'd need in an apocalypse.
In the 70s and 80s you could buy guns at the sporting goods store in pretty much every mall. I remember seeing guys walking around with break action shotguns they bought at Oshman's, just casually window shopping with that thang over their shoulder lol
The Marvel show Agents of SHIELD had a character name this movie in an earlier season, then in the last season they actually faced Chopping Mall-esque robots. I like it when underrated gems like this are acknowledged. Also, that couple shown at the beginning when the robots were introduced are apparently the main characters from a movie called Eating Raoul, which I think is about restaurant owners who start getting into cannibalism? So that's a weird connection.
That actor made a career for himself roaming around in movies in nothing but a pair of skimpy tightie whities. Then getting killed because tighty whities make it easier find in the dark ...?
That "no messages for you, Jamal," line is probably a reference to an old joke. The name can be different, but basically a phone (usually a public phone) rings a bunch of times, each time with the caller asking "is Jamal there?" After enough times to really annoy the person answering, it rings one more time and the caller says, "hi, this is Jamal, do I have any messages?"
@@ambds1975 I was thinking about that when I was writing the comment. The joke doesn't make sense anymore now that everyone has a cell phone with caller ID. :)
That might have killed the joke. Also, we have a lot more entertaining stuff to do now that we don't all spend our free time hanging around at the mall by the pay phones. :D
They'll never know the joy of having to have an arranged meeting spot with their friends, and if their friends are late, not knowing if they were waylaid by highwaymen, or their mom didn't let them go out, or what.
In a weird way, it’s actually kind of appropriate that Dick Miller went unmentioned. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love the guy, but I think fellow fans of his will understand exactly what I mean by that. R.I.P., bud.
Omg Chopping Mall! This was the first "fun-bad" movie I ever saw. Me and my sister snuck it out of my parents' VHS tape collection and watched it together, some time in the late 1990s. 😂 I remember being irritated that everybody was dumb enough to take off their clothes when there was a lightning storm and killer robots running (rolling?) around... Thanks for the dose of nostalgia!
"I've invented these new killer robots! They're very durable against gunfire and explosives and they're each equipped with powerful laser beams and plastic explosives. Which military should we sell them to?" "Hold that thought Tim! We got an excellent deal from a mall in Ohio who needs a new security force!"
When I was a kid browsing movies at my local Delchamps to rent (I’m that old), I was OBSESSED with the cover and description of this movie. I’d read it like every time and my mom would never let me get it.
Not just in a mall, but filmed in the same real-life mall. It was close to Hollywood and the owner liked the extra income, so it has been in a ton of other movies too.
4:58 this is extremely profound and insightful. It’s a great point… slasher movies like this always have these characters that break societal rules and get punished by being brutally murdered
6:44 I keep expecting General Kenobi to pop out of knowere and say "hello there" after all those times they said hi........ Also all of this sounds like a good Dr Who episode
This is one of my all time favorite cheesy 80’s horror films. I’ve seen it so many times I can recite it. Love it almost as much as the Friday the 13th series.
No mention of the Blands in the audience at the opening, they were classic in Eating Raoul and elsewhere, which tells you how seriously this movie takes itself
Do I sense a colab in the future? Not sure what that would look like but I figure I'd be the first to annoyingly ask. AS great alt hist Vids and Mark great shit man you are one of my favorite creators always look forward to seeing your next uploads.
@@FanboyFlicks Might wanna look into what kind of person he really is before enjoying his approval Mark. I enjoy your stuff, because it's an escape from people like him.
@@yesthenyes6727 Are going to threaten destruction of his employment, relationships, housing, school enrollment, social media accounts, and everything else you possibly can over the internet if he dares to collab with somebody who doesn't hate American freedoms?
8:30 Payphones used to allow incoming calls, and were stereotypically used by drug dealers to received orders. That, or actual wrong numbers from time to time too.
Funny as always. For some reason I didn’t realize you did reviews of these obscure weird old movies. It is extremely entertaining. Keep up the good work!
"Doesn't all this furniture just make you wanna cut loose?" Your comedic observations are the best. 😂 Also the pepperoni scene in the furniture store was so hard to watch, I was super uncomfortable.
I never understood the whole killer robot concept. The amount of lawsuits they would get would essentially shut down every single company within a year of release. The guy at the paint shop would probably receive billions for the pain and suffering he had to endure. And each of the families of the victims would get billions in pain and suffering.
Yes, of course! Because Dodgeball is one of the BEST movies ever MADE EVER!! So OBVIOUSLY, the rules of Dodgeball would apply to this exact situation, dude!
I loved this movie! Great review!!! Can’t thank you enough! Takes me down memory lane of watching USA Up All Night with Rhonda Shear and Gilbert Gottfried
Yea, the robots ended up costing the mall far more money than a random person stealing some casette tapes and clothes. Security that extreme you'd think there was a reserve storage for Fort Knox in the basement.
@@anonb4632 yeah, and people like Bezos who destroyed toys'r'us and malls and physical shopping centers, are destroying the entire economy. Plus the tax loopholing, and mistreatment of employees. We need more locations, to provide more jobs. Shopping malls, and wages to match the past 15 years of inflation would be better for the folks in the US at least.
@@noplace4akitty047 I don't live in the US, so the dynamic is a bit different, but these malls have been "hollowing out" our towns for years, so we have dying city centres (downtowns), and even suburban areas which suffer from a combination of high rents, low takings and low footfalls. Shopping malls also create infrastructure issues, since they tend to be way out of town meaning everyone has to drive there or take a long bus ride.
@@noplace4akitty047 I'm going to have to disagree with you on that one, toys arrest killed themselves by being assholes and not matching the prices to stores like target so people got fed up with their shit and stopped shopping there. Disney's excessive greed forced Hasbro to swindle TRU into an exclusive deal for Star Wars merchandise, At the time I was the only Star Wars fan who knew the sequel trilogy was gonna be a steaming pile of shit so who the hell's going listen to me.
- Our shopping center needs something new and I have a really good idea. - Killer robots? - I am thinking about fixing the old restrooms but killer robots sound better.
No, but imagine a movie written shot and acted as a horror movie, yet no one dies, nothing supernatural happens and there are no real jumpscares. It constantly seems like that's what's going to happen but never does. I don't know if someone could hold that same joke for 90 minutes, but I'm sure you can get a great short out of that.
You could do that in real life though. Like, cower and lurk and creep around like you were expecting to be eviscerated every minute. And then nothing would happen.
I've said it before and I'll say it again BEST FUCKING CHANNEL I'VE EVER SEEN, MARK IS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!! Soooooooo funny, absolutely superb 😂😂😂😂👌👍💯
Mary Woronov and Paul Bartel are a good sign in any film. They are old time exploitation actors who appeared in many low budget schlock films like Eat the Rich. Class acts.
@@Morfeusm though the reason why it's still quite popular in Southeast Asia is because it's really hot over here, and people just want to hangout in a really large airconditioned place
I didn’t have any money really, when I was a boy. I mean, a little bit, sure. But I mean, malls? When I was like 10? Not happening… But yeah, malls were a BIG deal when I was a boy, sure…. I remember the 90’s in that regard at least, as well as when I was with my mom in the 80’s, etc. at malls… They were great places…. 😁😁😁😁😁 Yeah, they generally went downhill after the 90’s…
There was a 50 year period were you would call up the telephone company and tell them to divert anyone calling you to a service. There would be people sitting in an office 24/7 answering the phone calls and taking messages. When you got home you called the service to get the messages. The services disappeared once answering machines became inexpensive. In the movie the guy called the payphone to get his messages because he dialed the wrong number. The gum chewing Jerk said there were no messages because he was being a jerk.
I watched this on Monstervision when I was a kid, and no joke it gave me nightmares of being in a giant empty shopping mall hunted by killer robots who would always seem to find me no matter where I tried to hide. The dreams would invariably end with me attempting to crawl through a vent or window or something and getting caught, which naturally resulted in a gruesome and painful execution. Needless to say that this is one of my favorite B movies of all time because of that.
So fun fact, this mall is the Sherman Oaks Galleria and I used to work there. It's also where Terminator 2 and Fast Times were filmed.
An commando!
Didn’t they tear this mall down?
@@billsimms2511 the building is still there but it's no longer a mall. It's just a few restaurants now.
my uncle used to shop there
and WW84?
I really wanna see a movie based on that Paint store owner's battle with his insurance company
Hell yes.
"Diminishing Returns"
Written and directed by Neil Breen.
@@doctorthirteen5727 And of course starring Neil Breen as the store owner. I can picture the scene as he first discovers the state of his store. "This can't be right! This can't be right!" He falls to his knees, picking up paint-damaged stock and holding it sadly, with the rest of the store poorly green-screened behind him. Later you see him using Jamal's payphone, calling his insurance company. "This can't be right! This can't be right!" He falls to his knees, the 'phone still in his hand. The scene then cuts to a boardroom in which various executives talk exposition at each other. "This is how we keep power, denying hard-working Americans their insurance claims. Soon we will control the satellites!"
Me too. I am Magine it as a quart room drama with a thriller twist. Turns out that the lawyers for the insurance companies are Killbots.
Doctor Thirteen except for your name you are a genius!
Andrew Gwilliam don’t forget how he then delivers Jamal‘s message. Jamal is his contact in the CIA of course.
“You smell like pepperoni....I LIKE PEPPERONI” 👁👄👁
*Starts humming and taking off clothes*
Hey, it’s Barbara Crampton. She’s been in _much_ weirder situations, trust me. I mean, just the year before, there was that whole incident with the sentient severed head....
That scene makes no sense. Who doesn't like pepperoni?
@@trevorlambert4226 Communists.
Was she humming "My baloney has a first name..."?
🤣🤣🤣👌💯
""You guys are fucking weird, I'm going home" has me in stitches
Gotta admit , that head explosion looked good for an eighties movie
It looked like a giant popcorn popping.
@JC Denton Don't forget _Raiders of the Lost Ark_ and _Hellraiser!_
@JC Denton Hell, yeah! Guess you could say movies were pretty… _MINDBLOWING_ back then!
@JC Denton Scanners is the best one. 🙂
It’s my favourite part of the movie
FYI, that's that the same mall from Schwarzenegger movie "Commando"!!! 😁😁😁
For anyone wondering, it’s the Galleria mall in Sherman Oaks, California.
@@spooplegeist good nugget of movie trivia. Thanks
Spooplegeist Its also the same mall from Terminator 2.
Good eye. Alissa Milano would be pleased.
Good find! I never noticed but it's obvious now.
I tried the "pepperoni" line on my wife. Didn't work.
She still your wife?
Dude, you gotta try again ! I use that line all the time, and it works 100% of the time, most of the time ! ;)
It only works is she really smells like pepperoni.
It didn't work? Seriously?
It only works on first dates!
During the Cold War, all malls in America had blast shield doors. It was part of the Star Wars defense program (as we see in Gymakata). It's less known that mall electric carts had lethal antirobot countermeasures in case of Soviet robots attacking a mall.
damn crazy
What a wild time.
That was a nice one. Really really nice one.
True facts.
Just like schools had those anti-radiation and bomb resist desks in the 1950s -1970s that were for hiding under!
As someone who was in his early teens in the 80's, yes the mall was a nice place to hang out on a Friday or Saturday night. You'd meet your friends there and just wander the mall, visit the stores, grab something from the food court and hit up the arcade. Then your parents would pick you up outside when the mall closed.
The hanging at the mall culture continued until around 2009.
Same in the 90s except some of us had beeper and would call others from the payphone bank to come meet us
In 2011-12 I’d say mall culture was on its last stretch. Saying from my own experience with the small two floor local mall located 15 minutes away from home. When I was 13 it would be packed and there were so many good stores. Now it’s 2023 and the mall is barely full with most good stores having left except for macys, dicks sporting goods, and a few big name clothing stores. Most vendors are now just private small business fillers.
Hey that's Sherman Oaks Galleria! The mall has been in at least two Schwarzenegger movies
It has been in many movies over the years!
@Ultra CNC Affirmative
they also alternately show the exterior of the Beverly Center in its neon 80s glory.
And fast times at Ridgemont high, and phantom of the mall
@@66cuda And 'Night of the Comet' with Kellie Maronie returning and causing more damage to that elevator.
First person to pitch an escalator: "Escalators, they do the climbing for you" 😏👍
In Soviet Russia, only escalation is of nuclear variety
Oh yeah back in the 80s and early 90s Northland Mall in Columbus Ohio was the mall to hang out at. Don't think we had any malfunctioning killer robot guarding it though.
That last sentence was not convincing
The Mall of the Americas had the roller coaster and was just so ridiculously huge, with so many stores filled with novelty junk constantly failing, only to re-open under a new name with a new aesthetic. I mean there were toy stores that only survived off of the craze of adults buying each new toy line in the belief it would be the next Star Wars, GIJoe, Beanie Baby, etc. A Grandiose display of the obesities brought about by mass consumerism, from the 70s, into the 80s. Then the 90s tried to
pre-package new things as an investment, and a future nostalgic item.
That's what *they* want you to think.
The kid stealing stuff in the beginning is the same guy who played Joey on Nightmare on Elm Street 3.
He had some really wet dreams...
@@CorbCorbin as did I..to him actually. Ik TMI but I was about 11 when I first watched Dream Warriors and let's face it.....Joey's a dreamboat🥰
@Nick Gagnon yes I couldn't remember his name lol, but I was too lazy to look it up. Middle school me would've known right off the bat.
Do you like my body Joey?
When I saw this the first time I was excited because I thought Joey was going to be one of the main character. Instead he’s just there for a blink and you’ll miss it cameo.
The mall in the opening scene in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High." Also, I miss shopping malls with bookstores. The place to be in the 80s. Arcades, food courts, and hours of window shopping for stuff you didn't need. Leg warmers, knitted skirts, jelly shoes, and actually going to a record store to shop for music. Can we bring the 80s back? I'm tired of 2020.
Sadly, malls are pretty much on their way out for good. Back in the 80’s I never would have thought that. I miss going to the record stores and arcades
Way things are going we might be bringing back the 1780’s, if that helps?
I miss the 90's too, even the 00's.
World's been slowly falling to shit since 2013 oddly enough... maybe the Mayans were right after all and it wasn't an immediate thing. XD
@@planescaped Yup. That's when the millenials came of age.
The only remnant of the original Sherman Oaks Mall is the court where the Pacific 16 Theatres is located, which are on the uppermost of what was previously the southern Robinsons-May store. The majority of the remaining mall was turned into offices.
I feel like you always know when I need to laugh. Good to have you back Mark
I was JUST wondering if Mark was gonna put out another video soon
James May's Flying Washing Machine I had just checked the channel today, to see if I’d missed a notification. It just felt like the right time for him to drop an episode of some sort.
Luis Collado what?
His sense of humor is almost perfect for these garbage movies lol. I laugh more watching these reviews than I do any modern sitcom
Up at Schulsbury they teach Kathmology to weirdos who worship limp tulips and soggy dimes.
For another mall-centric romp: Sorority Babes at the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. That movie is a whole mess of weirdness, involving an Imp that grants monkey paw wishes that aren’t plot relevant, a punk named Spider who robs mall bowling alleys, and bad Bride of Frankenstein Halloween costumes.
Its a super fun movie.
Based on a true story, I believe.
Fantastic title!
So I have an answer for the JAMAL scene: so I’m from NYC and back in the day people used to use pay phones as their home numbers. You could figure out the number of the phone (sometimes they were just on the phone) and you could give out the number to others. Some people would tell someone to call them at specific times knowing they would be there to answer the call. Fun little BACK IN THE DAY fact even we had pay phones lol
2 observations about this movie:
I spent most of the 80s hanging around malls and gun stores. I don't care what Chopping Mall or Dawn of The Dead say, there are no gun stores in malls.
And:
ANY woman who can run, jump, crawl, fall, hide, and fight while concealing a road flare in her boobs is a true hero and that's why Kelli Maroney is awesome and able to survive the Night of the Comet.
I live in West Virginia and there is a dunham's sporting goods in our mall. Guns ammo and survival gear and pretty much everything you'd need in an apocalypse.
@@justinarthur212 cool! One stop shopping! 👍
@Luis Collado I suppose if you're going to have all those school shooters, they should be properly trained...
In the 70s and 80s you could buy guns at the sporting goods store in pretty much every mall. I remember seeing guys walking around with break action shotguns they bought at Oshman's, just casually window shopping with that thang over their shoulder lol
Not only are there no gun stores in malls, there are no damn malls anymore! Well, there’s a few but they are dying out fast.
Damn, I miss malls from the 1980s. Actually I just miss the 1980s.
Me too. The local mall doesn’t have Seats, jcpenney or Macy’s anymore and half the smaller stores inside the mall are closed up . Times are a changing
So many cocaine mirrors at the fairgrounds! Even more feathered roach clips!😂
@@mentalphilanthropist35 There's a mythology in there somewhere...I'm sure of it.
Ahhh the height of the crack epidemic 🥰
Mmm, Iran-Contra and the government ignoring AIDS...
The Marvel show Agents of SHIELD had a character name this movie in an earlier season, then in the last season they actually faced Chopping Mall-esque robots. I like it when underrated gems like this are acknowledged.
Also, that couple shown at the beginning when the robots were introduced are apparently the main characters from a movie called Eating Raoul, which I think is about restaurant owners who start getting into cannibalism? So that's a weird connection.
The open mouth gum-chewing was the scariest part for me. Yikes.
Apparently, RoboCop Junior there wasn’t a fan of it, either.
Right?! So doggone rude!
That actor made a career for himself roaming around in movies in nothing but a pair of skimpy tightie whities. Then getting killed because tighty whities make it easier find in the dark ...?
He has a massive jaw from chewing gum his entire life
Don’t forget to “Dip” lol Duck, Dodge, Dip, Dive and Dodge!
If you can dodge a wrench you can dodge a ball
That "no messages for you, Jamal," line is probably a reference to an old joke. The name can be different, but basically a phone (usually a public phone) rings a bunch of times, each time with the caller asking "is Jamal there?" After enough times to really annoy the person answering, it rings one more time and the caller says, "hi, this is Jamal, do I have any messages?"
Came here to say this, thank you. I hadn't thought of this prank call since phones went wireless, lol
@@ambds1975 I was thinking about that when I was writing the comment. The joke doesn't make sense anymore now that everyone has a cell phone with caller ID. :)
That might have killed the joke. Also, we have a lot more entertaining stuff to do now that we don't all spend our free time hanging around at the mall by the pay phones. :D
@@ambds1975 These darn kids these days with their futuristic computer phones! **shake fist**
They'll never know the joy of having to have an arranged meeting spot with their friends, and if their friends are late, not knowing if they were waylaid by highwaymen, or their mom didn't let them go out, or what.
I can't believe he skipped over Dick Miller as the janitor. He's always awesome.
Maybe, to much of a direct reference to a larger channel, that also reviewed this movie.
It also has Mr. and Mrs. Bland from Eating Raoul.
Dang.
I almost forgot he died last year. He was such a good character actor.
RIP, Dick Miller.
In a weird way, it’s actually kind of appropriate that Dick Miller went unmentioned. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love the guy, but I think fellow fans of his will understand exactly what I mean by that. R.I.P., bud.
this whole time jamal has been listening to every user of a pay phone
Omg Chopping Mall! This was the first "fun-bad" movie I ever saw. Me and my sister snuck it out of my parents' VHS tape collection and watched it together, some time in the late 1990s. 😂
I remember being irritated that everybody was dumb enough to take off their clothes when there was a lightning storm and killer robots running (rolling?) around...
Thanks for the dose of nostalgia!
YES DUDE! I love Chopping Mall. My personal favorite part is that at no point during the film is there any chopping at all. So good.
Ah, you noticed too lol Very good. i love it honestly. Makes the pun even more pointless.
Dude... spoilers!! 😡
"I've invented these new killer robots! They're very durable against gunfire and explosives and they're each equipped with powerful laser beams and plastic explosives. Which military should we sell them to?"
"Hold that thought Tim! We got an excellent deal from a mall in Ohio who needs a new security force!"
When I was a kid browsing movies at my local Delchamps to rent (I’m that old), I was OBSESSED with the cover and description of this movie. I’d read it like every time and my mom would never let me get it.
Some of the cast were also in the "Night of the Comet"; a great B movie. Some of that movie was set in a mall.
Not just in a mall, but filmed in the same real-life mall. It was close to Hollywood and the owner liked the extra income, so it has been in a ton of other movies too.
4:58 this is extremely profound and insightful. It’s a great point… slasher movies like this always have these characters that break societal rules and get punished by being brutally murdered
Dude, introducing yourself into the scenes is gold! More of that please
2:12 the couple shown were also featured in “Eating Raoul”. That movie is ...something.
Bland and Woronov co-starred/cameoed in 17 films together. Someone needs to edit them all into one contiguous epic!
Bartel and Woronov
6:44 I keep expecting General Kenobi to pop out of knowere and say "hello there" after all those times they said hi........
Also all of this sounds like a good Dr Who episode
This is one of my all time favorite cheesy 80’s horror films. I’ve seen it so many times I can recite it. Love it almost as much as the Friday the 13th series.
Dude..this movie is a total guilty pleasure of mine. Seen it so many times at 2 a.m. on some randon unknown channel throughout out the 1990s
Everytime that shot of the actress blown head appeared I lol
No mention of the Blands in the audience at the opening, they were classic in Eating Raoul and elsewhere, which tells you how seriously this movie takes itself
should have been called "shopping maul"
Or even Chopping Maul
You really need to be on a Best of the Worst episode with RLM. Next to them, you're like the best Shitty B-movie Reviewer ever.
Agreed. I'd love to see him at the table with Jay, Rich, and Jack or Josh. I don't think Mark would mesh as well at the table with Mike.
@@jameswarner5878 don't you think ? They're both depression HQ
I think he'd be awesome on a Re:View with Jay or Josh. He and Mike would be alot of snark but that might be really good too.
@jared price haha no
How about a Canada special with Colin, Jim, Mark and Brandon Tenold?
Ahem, I believe you meant "Dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge!" ^.^
You can dodge a wrench you can dodge a lazer
@@thevoiceofseason2465 if you can dodge traffic you can dodge an evil robot
@@thevoiceofseason2465 Of course you can. You just have to see it coming and move faster than light.
14:17.
Its a cable wrap. Used to see them everywhere when places started installing CAT 5 E.
Been really enjoying your series lately, bud. Keep it up!
Thanks bud, much appreciated!
Do I sense a colab in the future? Not sure what that would look like but I figure I'd be the first to annoyingly ask. AS great alt hist Vids and Mark great shit man you are one of my favorite creators always look forward to seeing your next uploads.
@@FanboyFlicks hey bud! Let's nip this series in th bud
@@FanboyFlicks Might wanna look into what kind of person he really is before enjoying his approval Mark. I enjoy your stuff, because it's an escape from people like him.
@@yesthenyes6727 Are going to threaten destruction of his employment, relationships, housing, school enrollment, social media accounts, and everything else you possibly can over the internet if he dares to collab with somebody who doesn't hate American freedoms?
I actually own this movie on DVD. We'd rent the VHS fron a local rental store once a month or so when I was a kid.
Good times. Good times.
8:30 Payphones used to allow incoming calls, and were stereotypically used by drug dealers to received orders. That, or actual wrong numbers from time to time too.
Funny as always. For some reason I didn’t realize you did reviews of these obscure weird old movies. It is extremely entertaining. Keep up the good work!
I mean I would argue there are already horror movies where nothing really ever happens; just a lot of jumpscares, cats or no cats
Omg I used to watch this all the time as a kid!
Damn !! I still remember back in the day when the mall was the place to be.
Good times man. Get something to eat, hang out with your friends, talk to girls. And malls always had the best arcades.
@@TikkiEXX indeed sir...now you can do all those things on your phone !!! The world we grew up in is gone .
It still is in Asia, at least before the lockdown
@@TikkiEXX don’t forget record stores! Cd or cassette stores were great to walk around and look at the album covers
@@tyrranicalt-rad6164 as great as technology is, way too much can be done with our fingers now. I mean, it’s making us more asocial, lazy and fat
"Doesn't all this furniture just make you wanna cut loose?"
Your comedic observations are the best. 😂 Also the pepperoni scene in the furniture store was so hard to watch, I was super uncomfortable.
I keep thinking that there's no more movies to show us, and I keep being wrong haha.
I already learned to stay away from malls after Dawn of the Dead.
Another hilarious video Mark. I really loved the reoccurring gag of Leslie getting her head blown off.
7:29 She hums a melody from the opera: Prince Igor by Alexander Borodin (for some strange reason)
I'm so happy with this consistent stream of super-content that you make, man. Each video is a treat.
12:00...yup being on Fire is a hell of a motivator..
...guuurl
I never understood the whole killer robot concept. The amount of lawsuits they would get would essentially shut down every single company within a year of release. The guy at the paint shop would probably receive billions for the pain and suffering he had to endure. And each of the families of the victims would get billions in pain and suffering.
SEE!!!! The rules of Dodgeball apply to every tense or life threatening situation. 😄
Yes, of course! Because Dodgeball is one of the BEST movies ever MADE EVER!! So OBVIOUSLY, the rules of Dodgeball would apply to this exact situation, dude!
The pepperoni line had my husband and me laughing.
That head splatter as actually really well done.
I didn't know the word " hi" could be a turn- on ,but apparently, it is
hi
@@ericv00 😂
I was expecting Mark to green-screen himself in the scene by saying "Hi"
@@Jason-uw9ex Lol 👍
5:35 Deathstalker II!!! I'll never forget that smirk.
It's just John Terlesky being John Terlesky.
Chopping Mall: Rise of The Machines.
Chopping Mall : Dark Fate
Chopping Mall: Exodus
Chopping Mall: Jamal's Story.
_Chopping Mall: Tokyo Drift_
Chopping mall too : Electric Bogaloo
The thing that jumps out at 14:15 looks to be a facehugger from Alien.
Edit: I put a timestamp for ten seconds later than I’d intended
I loved this movie! Great review!!! Can’t thank you enough! Takes me down memory lane of watching USA Up All Night with Rhonda Shear and Gilbert Gottfried
At 2:03..... " Rock n Roll High School"!!!
What sort of shop lifters you need “protectors” and Star Trek doors.
Yea, the robots ended up costing the mall far more money than a random person stealing some casette tapes and clothes. Security that extreme you'd think there was a reserve storage for Fort Knox in the basement.
So since they already had a huge star trek blast doors. Why the robots?
Quick, than teenager is stealing a $30 blouse! INCINERATE HER!!
“Bl0w h£r g0dd@mn h£@d 0ff” is apparently unacceptable for me to write
"That's sucks"
A perfect encapsulation of the existential dread of normal life.
@Luis Collado ...Poppy?
Movies based on puns are usually pretty self-aware and amusing, e.g.: Poutlrygeist
Eg. Zombeavers. I think Planet Terror is also a good one
thankskilling
This was the inspiration for RoboChop
That pepperoni line is how I get all the lady’s
All the lady’s what?
Seeing this makes me sad that malls are dying.
Doesn't make me sad. Those bastards destroyed entire communities and family run businesses. What goes around comes around.
@@anonb4632 yeah, and people like Bezos who destroyed toys'r'us and malls and physical shopping centers, are destroying the entire economy. Plus the tax loopholing, and mistreatment of employees. We need more locations, to provide more jobs. Shopping malls, and wages to match the past 15 years of inflation would be better for the folks in the US at least.
@@noplace4akitty047 I don't live in the US, so the dynamic is a bit different, but these malls have been "hollowing out" our towns for years, so we have dying city centres (downtowns), and even suburban areas which suffer from a combination of high rents, low takings and low footfalls. Shopping malls also create infrastructure issues, since they tend to be way out of town meaning everyone has to drive there or take a long bus ride.
@@anonb4632 good point.
@@noplace4akitty047 I'm going to have to disagree with you on that one, toys arrest killed themselves by being assholes and not matching the prices to stores like target so people got fed up with their shit and stopped shopping there. Disney's excessive greed forced Hasbro to swindle TRU into an exclusive deal for Star Wars merchandise, At the time I was the only Star Wars fan who knew the sequel trilogy was gonna be a steaming pile of shit so who the hell's going listen to me.
- Our shopping center needs something new and I have a really good idea.
- Killer robots?
- I am thinking about fixing the old restrooms but killer robots sound better.
On a limited budget, it's sensible to focus on the essentials.
I mean, people can find restrooms anywhere. Waste of money!
My second favourite sarcastic Canadian film critic on TH-cam.
This movie clearly inspired Rian Johnson to become a director.
This has got to be the biggest reach to whine about RJ. TLJ was ages ago and the best of the sequels, get over it 🤣
TurboGamingUK facts
Mark, im a huge fan of the show, and this is probably, one of my favorite ones, i was laughing the entire show. Great job!!.
I LOVED Chopping Mall! Is there something wrong with me where I recognized what movie it would be from the thumbnail alone?
I also like pepperoni. And Barbara Crampton. I would find it difficult to decide which I would most rather eat.
"Wouldn't it be interesting if nothing went wrong in a horror movie?"
Yeah fam I think those are just called movies tho
No, but imagine a movie written shot and acted as a horror movie, yet no one dies, nothing supernatural happens and there are no real jumpscares. It constantly seems like that's what's going to happen but never does.
I don't know if someone could hold that same joke for 90 minutes, but I'm sure you can get a great short out of that.
@@tximinoman What about "The Happening" though?
You could do that in real life though. Like, cower and lurk and creep around like you were expecting to be eviscerated every minute. And then nothing would happen.
Things always go wrong in any decently written movie. Conflict is a key element in story.
@@tximinoman You've just described _The Blair Witch Project._
I've said it before and I'll say it again BEST FUCKING CHANNEL I'VE EVER SEEN, MARK IS ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!! Soooooooo funny, absolutely superb 😂😂😂😂👌👍💯
Judging from this video thumbnail, I thought we were gonna get a Robin Sparkles, "Lets go to the mall" but with horror twist. 😄
Mary Woronov and Paul Bartel are a good sign in any film. They are old time exploitation actors who appeared in many low budget schlock films like Eat the Rich. Class acts.
I love how the 3 guys fit the definition of alpha, beta and omega males. Also, in Short Ciruit, lightning turned the robot good, not evil.
10:48 Great Patches O’houlihan quote😂
You're starting to make moneyt on this now right? :D Im glad for you, loved your content for years now
I've been watching you forever Mark. Im really glad to see your channel doing so well!
Mark needs to review 80s horror gem "The Stuff" if he has not already. I mean a horror movie about basically yogurt.
Not a bad idea!
Boy does that movie stick in your memory!
The poster is similar to the one used for the horror film House.
Malls are still popular here in Asia, at least before the pandemic
Here in Europe too, albeit they are declining in popularity last few years.
@@Morfeusm though the reason why it's still quite popular in Southeast Asia is because it's really hot over here, and people just want to hangout in a really large airconditioned place
@@Morfeusm I live in Europe... Empty units everywhere. Combo of high rents and global economic reform.
Keep these bad movie reviews coming Mark. Can't get enough of them. Thanks for the great content!
9:09 and third: awesome story for your funeral!
My favorite channel on TH-cam for a reason.
I didn’t have any money really, when I was a boy. I mean, a little bit, sure. But I mean, malls? When I was like 10? Not happening…
But yeah, malls were a BIG deal when I was a boy, sure…. I remember the 90’s in that regard at least, as well as when I was with my mom in the 80’s, etc. at malls…
They were great places…. 😁😁😁😁😁
Yeah, they generally went downhill after the 90’s…
Is there an award for the dullest comment on TH-cam?
@@seymourskinner2533 Yes, there is. Since I haven’t received an actual physical award, I would imagine that it went to someone else. 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪
90s and early early 2000s the mall was the jam for us teens.
There was a 50 year period were you would call up the telephone company and tell them to divert anyone calling you to a service. There would be people sitting in an office 24/7 answering the phone calls and taking messages. When you got home you called the service to get the messages. The services disappeared once answering machines became inexpensive. In the movie the guy called the payphone to get his messages because he dialed the wrong number. The gum chewing Jerk said there were no messages because he was being a jerk.
I watched this on Monstervision when I was a kid, and no joke it gave me nightmares of being in a giant empty shopping mall hunted by killer robots who would always seem to find me no matter where I tried to hide. The dreams would invariably end with me attempting to crawl through a vent or window or something and getting caught, which naturally resulted in a gruesome and painful execution.
Needless to say that this is one of my favorite B movies of all time because of that.
Anyone ever made the connection that Mark looks and sounds like that guy on NCIS? Timothy McGee
Yes. Thank you. I have been trying to figure this out for years.
The mall was definitely the place to hang out back in the 80’s and 90’s. I miss it.
This would never of happened if the mall just hired Paul Blart instead.
Yeah, but can robots get sidelined by diabeetus? ...Didn't think so!
@@bryangarcia5599 depends how good their A.I. programming is
@MrAdamFC Artificial Insulin?
@@bryangarcia5599 Ah yes diabetes ex machina. All we need now is to get Elon Musk onboard.
@@MrAdamFC R.I.P. WILFORD BRIMLEY
Christ, head explosions never get old! Thank you for editing it in over and over! ...and over!