I’ve always had mixed feelings about Salah when I was Muslim. Sometimes when I wasn’t in the headspace to pray, it felt like a chore that I had to complete out of obligation. It didn’t help that I would often feel extreme guilt for treating Salah like a chore. On other days, especially on Fridays, it was a lot more enjoyable because of the ritual of preparation (showering, wuduu, putting on a nice ‘abaya, etc) as well as the social aspect of praying (praying with Muslims in my community, seeing friends and classmates at the masjid, etc). And because Arabic isn’t my native language, listening to Qur’an recitation was always enjoyable, until reading the Tafsir and critically examining the Qur’an. Listening to Qur’an recitation will never be the way it was… I’m still closeted and not in a safe place to be openly ex-Muslim, so I pray and go to the masjid against my will. I’ll definitely need some space from Islamic rituals to be able to go to a masjid voluntarily someday. For now, I’ll use your tip and treat prayer like a meditation, at least temporarily so I don’t lose my sanity lol
I'm in a similar situation. Unfortunately, I'm still living with my family and forced to pray and visit the mosque every friday against my will too since I can't 'come out' as an ex-muslim. But using the prayer as some sort of a meditation really helps. I can only recommend it to anyone with the same problem!
Ex-Christian but I thought I'd answer one of your questions anyways. I have attended Latin Mass before and I honestly found it mesmerizing. The priest spoke in a dramatic, flowing tone. The words were beautiful and even if a section droned on for awhile before we had to stand or kneel or do another action, it was like a weird meditation. I actually thought it was better than normal Mass in English. I have also heard it described as the priest seemingly casting magic spells which I think is pretty close to what I felt. I also think you're touching on something interesting here. A lot of people who stay devout believers have some middle ground level of belief. A lot of people who leave religion were previously very passionate about it or never felt anything. I only left because too many bad things happened and my mom is a bit crazy. If I had grown up in a more normal family I would probably still be Christian. I liked the routine and the ritual, I hated the scrutiny and promise that everything I did would summon demons. It made mundane things like prayes horrifying for me. I went from being someone who considered becoming a nun to someone who practices an atheistic form of paganism to get in touch with my routine and ritual side. Most believers around me do the rituals because they want to do the right thing and believe in God because that was deeply ingrained in them. Religion isn't a big disruption to their lives really and it brings them some measure of peace. I always found that human element fascinating.
I never really liked the rituals and worship because I felt like they played on my emotions. Everything was there to appeal to my emotional state of mind. Even as a Christian I had recognized this. As an ex-Christian now I think I would have stayed IF we were allowed to question the claims of the bible itself, accept nuance, and reject certain teachings which included things like whether atonement was necessary or if hell were even real. But the push by fundamentalists to just assert the certainty of their claims made it impossible to do so, and in doing so, the bible just became another book.
Christianity not only talk about heaven and hell and sin because Christianity already has The Way - The Truth and The Life on Jesus, but there is also important thing to talk about is humanity and salvation (love). Basically, this is the purpose of embracing Christianity, Catholic Christian especially. But I don't have any idea other community and person who applied ceremonial and Christianity activities. There are millions of "humanity" works could be done voluntarily by every individual as a Christian, serving to each other for example if you want to be really as a Christian who applying "love" the rule from Jesus.
@@CB66941 , once a Christian, always a Christian. You WERE a NOMINAL Christian. You called yourself an ex (former) Christian because you thought you were a christian. The fact is, you were born to a so called “Christian family” even if you don’t know what a “Christian “means.
spoken like a person who didn't grow up with the Latin mass lol. It's excruciatingly boring (especially for a child) when you know all the common parts by heart and you can't understand the ones that don't repeat. my favorite part was usually the two to three songs in my native language. only parts that could keep my attention.
Being Christian is having a relationship with Jesus christ ✝️ THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING . HOLY BIBLE TELL US THAT PRAYING AND WORSHIPPING BRINGS YOU CLOSER TO GOD .
i really enjoyed your perspective on talking about "the human experience" rather than finding every single flaw. Im in the same position, i no longer need to convince myself. Its all about getting by, and trying to be at peace with everyone.
i really resonate with the constant state of anxiety that prayer and islam put me in. This Jumuah i went to the mosque, and the sheikh said something like "fear Allah and his wrath and ask forgiveness from him", and I actually audibly chuckled. I guess god is angry at his believers for things he created them to do with his knowledge.
@@YEY0806 fear may or may not be mentioned more than love, but the fact that you must fear the one whose in hands is your life and soul sounds like an abusive relationship.
@@zayd8883 it really is, for even when I was muslim, I never felt at peace as some muslims would claim. I would always feel shit about myself and guilty whenever I thought badly about the religion or Allah. Abusive is the best way to describe it
As an ex-Muslim who never bothered to look up the ex-Muslim community until I stumbled upon Apostate Prophet a few months ago, I must say I think your videos are much better. You make them for ex-Muslims to cope with the loss of their faith, while AP just makes videos for non-Muslims to justify their hatred of Islam.
Thank you for this video! I’m an ex-Christian atheist and I so deeply related to the way you described how you used to feel in a mosque when you were a believer. I felt the same way in church - preoccupied with this weight of the “eternal perspective” whether that was centered on my own salvation (which I constantly doubted), the salvation of others, or the apparent futility of any aspect of my life other than praying and proselytizing. The existential burden of my beliefs themselves, my doubts excluded, was so overwhelming for me in a way that it didn’t seem to be for other believers around me. It’s so interesting that was your experience as well. I really enjoyed hearing what this experience was like for you, and it makes me want to learn more about Muslim and ex-Muslim experiences from a viewpoint that isn’t a bigoted Christian or xenophobic one but also doesn’t gloss over the flaws in the religion. Glad I found your channel!
@@ApostateAladdinPin. Me . If u want to find wrong in islam u get wrong . If u are not open mind u will get miskate in islam. If u r open minded u will get truth in islam 😊
I was never indoctrinated into any faith and in Sweden, religion is very private, and the practitioner chooses how much of it they want. But I recently at the tender age of 48 took in a Christian Sunday service for the first time, and it was intensely boring, and poorly attended. But I did notice that those in attendance did at least try to pay attention.
I was kid when my life was changed, a man (Christian pastor) came to the door at my house. He told me that God loved me so much he gave his only begotten son, etc. I believed, I confess with my mouth. The man prayed for me, he touched my forehead and I received the Holy Spirit. My heart changed, it was a spiritual experience and I felt the presence of God.
I can relate to your experience on how peaceful it actually feels now to go to the Masjid. I recently had to attend a Jinazah prayer. In the past, it was a truly heartbreaking and traumatizing experience as you think of what this person may be dealing with once they're placed in the grave. I always felt people at islamic funerals cry for themselves as they think of similar fate that awaits them. They seem to cry out of fear for their loved ones more than their loss. It really is a cruel psychological state of being.
I'm Jewish and haven't done much in the way of Jewish practice in several years, though I grew up attending synagogue weekly and at one time was heavily involved with a local community. Your description of the muscle memory of the movement and words of the prayers resonated with me. The few times I've attended services in the past few years, my body knew what to do even as I felt kind of silly because I didn't really believe in or care much about what I was saying. The ritualistic and community/communal aspect of prayer is powerful. Thank you for sharing your experience!
Yep. I'm a Nigerian ex-Muslim and until you and my non-muslim Arab friends explained the meaning of the verses of the quran, I enjoyed the way it was sung. I also enjoyed singing it too and thought it beautiful. Now that I know how much call to violence, call to intolerance and woman-hating there is, I can't enjoy it anymore. I still don't know what any of it means though. It just doesn't impress me like it used to.
Not equal are the good deed and the bad deed. Repel evil by that which is better, and then the one who is hostile to you will become as a devoted friend. SURAH FUSSILAT 41:34
i've been an exie for 4 years, but i've only just come across your videos. your tonality and your words give me such peace and i feel safe while listening to your content. you teach me tolerance and acceptance of other belief systems and their followers, while never invalidating my own. as an exie in a 3rd world country, it's hardly ever that i feel safe and validated. thank you for existing and thank you for taking the time to share such beautiful experiences and thoughts < 3
I am a woman. I went multiple times to a masque as an ex Muslim. I wore the hijab for that purpose but didn't pray. As a woman I could have had hyperion so it is not a big deal not praying. Anyway I only watched the others and remembered myself as a believer. I was comfortable cus I wasn't forced to be there. But I always felt a relief as I went out again.
i really appreciate how clearly you communicate your thoughts and feelings. it's a talent, for sure, but also a skill that needs practice and self reflection. as someone who values clarity in order to understand people on a deeper level, it's so refreshing, and i could listen to you go on for hours. i barely have to interpret what you're saying because you just tell everything straightforwardly. thanks
@15:26, you summed it up nicely, "it is no different from following a flow of crowd ...." Once I was in restaurant in Hamtramck (city adjacent to Detroit), while eating our afternoon meal, the owner came and asked us to leave because just then there was a blare of Adaan from the nearly mosque.......That was the last time I ever went to that place.
As an ExChristian it was really interesting to hear your perspective on this before and after you deconstructed. I never really felt fear of hell or anything while praying (my church didn't go too hard in that thankfully), my fear was mostly only I periods when I felt like I wasn't a real Christian I haven't tried since
@davidcook7899 - I am a Christian. Hellfire is certainly preached by Christ himself, but that wasn't his entire ministry, and so, in my church, mostly, it was about the love of God and slightly on the judgment of God. I remain a Christian since everything spoken in the Bible is true. Once you have verified that and I mean verified, you can never think of becoming an atheist or anything else. I mean, who would want to leave something they have clearly identified to be true as clear as day? None. Hence, I remain a Christian.
@@lifethroughromans8295 I'll definitely give you there are many varieties or Christianity that go all in in the hellfire. All you need to do for an older example is look at the apocalypse of Peter. Jesus however likely didn't believe In hell. If you look at many of the references to hell in the bible it's translated from the word ghena which is actually a physical place in earth. There is still a clear idea of punishment and fire. But the idea of an eternal torture was likely adapted from greek and Roman mythology. The bit thing for me at the time was despite believing in hell I only occasionally saw it as a threat directed at me.
The anxiety about all the others destined to go to hell and knowing that whatever I do would never be enough yet the one who could do something is the very one sending such people to hell, that's something I can relate to.
I've always felt guilty because I never felt anything good during religious practices, when many people around me were so expressive of how heavenly these things feel to them, I always thought I was not good enough, untill I finally figured out that I didn't believe in all these things fully, I always had lingering suspensions in the back of my mind, and when I decided to resolve these suspicions, I completely disbelieved
Thank you for your effort man ! My mother used to take me to pray with her in Ramadan, I didn't have a choice it was a must. So, what kept me sane during those years of praying is my imagination. I would imagine things in details like the carpets color and shapes, the wooden design or something like imagining my life without praying. I used this time for meditation, day dreaming, and planning until I finally put my plans into actions and created a life for me without musts.
In my childhood and teenage years in church, i very much enjoyed the singing, but nothing else. Prayers annoyed me because I had a strong distaste for being made to put on an act by folding my hands, shutting my eyes, bowing down my head, listening to and reciting words that meant nothing to me. During the sermon and the rest of the service i would thumb through a Bible while thinking about far more enjoyable things such as comic books, animated cartoons, novels and stories whose heroes i really liked, not the ones in th Bible. For many years, into my teens, I did expect that one day i would finally "see the light" and have "true faith". I imagined the "Holy Ghost" or a child-angel who hopefully would be a girl about my age, would fly down from heaven to greet me, then up in the blue sky i would see a beautiful staircase made of puffy white clouds with rainbows and sparkly jewels and maybe I would get to climb it, or if not that, i would have a profound dream or daytime vision that would cause my mind to be transformed. The whole world would look different, and my life would change in profound and beautiful ways. Nothing like that ever happened though! In all those years pondering what my anticipated faith would be like, I cared nothing about either "God" nor "Jesus". My indifference to them didn't trouble me at all since i was sure having faith would change that. Many years later, on rare occasions while visiting believing relatives, i would attend church again, and once again i still enthusiastically enjoyed the singing, especially of old hymns I still fondly remembered, but otherwise my mind still wandered off to more interesting topics.
Christianity not only talk about heaven and hell and sin because Christianity already has The Way - The Truth and The Life on Jesus, but there is also important thing to talk about is humanity and salvation (love). Basically, this is the purpose of embracing Christianity, Catholic Christian especially. But I don't have any idea other community and person who applied ceremonial and Christianity activities. There are millions of "humanity" works could be done voluntarily by every individual as a Christian, serving to each other for example if you want to be really as a Christian who applying "love" the rule from Jesus. Might be someone know better. 😃😃
7:50 kind of a stupid point. The quran does not say to abandon this life completely to not enjoy what allah has blessed us with, to live a full life, it simply says ontop of all of that know who your lord is and obey his commands.
I appreciate you talking about this. I probably won't go to a mosque anytime soon. From my memory of when I did go.. I always rotated to looking at the carpet patterns and then imagining my prayers reaching god, where our sujood together will create this awesome invisible beam, granting us good points. And then I stare at the person in front of me and think "Oh no, your foot is peeking out, but that's not on purpose so I'm sure god will accept your prayer!" Stuff like that.. 😵
Did you know that April is Arab America heritage month? I don't know how to embrace an Arab identity as an apostate. It's difficult to connect as a kafir.
Arab culture ain't Muslim culture. As an Indian ex Muslim, it's hard to reconcile my love for the Hindu culture that brought us here whilst also knowing the existence of Hindu fascists ruining my home so I do understand, but familiarizing myself with Buddhism and hindu philosophy helped me make the disconnect. You should read pre Islamic poetry and history, especially if I'm not mistaken that Arab civilization is one of the oldest with mesopotamia. But maybe it goes deeper and if that's the case I'm sorry, hope you figure stuff out
@@cheezburger2000 Arabs are a Near East culture, which means their origins are connected to Mesopotamia. But they're a younger culture than societies like Kanaan, or even the ancient Israelites. At least that is my understanding. Modern Egyptians are also Arab.
I often go to the local mosque when I am in another city , though I am not a believer! Because Its a great place for a brief rest, to freshen up or even to "relieve " oneself ( all for free ) 🙂 ! In my opinion, that is also the added attraction about mosques for believers too . ! It is not just about doing the prayers ! 🙂
9:42 ironically yeah. you hit the mark. Yeah somehow after loosening a bit from religion doctrine. you feel more ease. The pressure to put more and more people into own religion dissipates...
This are interesting perspectives. I kinda relate like per example wandering thoughts during a service (But I do enjoy prayer movements, more then I did earlier, it gives me peace!🤲🏽)
That's because they stole Eastern Orthodox architecture, Hagia Sophia still has Icons of Jesus and the Saints that remain even after Islamic Ottoman occupation.
Wow, your recent positive inner experience at the mosque actually matches exactly the inner experience of how Christians feel inside when attending church. Everything you described, primarily going out of one's own need and choice, not out of duty or fear. And that changes everything. We feel we have the right to be there. We feel accepted the way we are, flaws and all, whether we're imperfect and clumsy and awkward in our prayer or not. We are told God loves us just the way we are and wants us there, and is happy to receive us in his "house". I get distracted all the time in my thoughts, but I have never felt guilty for it. I am always the only one with my head up looking around at the beautiful art on the ceiling, the sculptures or icons left and right, and whispering "hi" to friends and neighbors I recognize at the Liturgy. It's really a different world, being a Christian. And I always leave the church whenever I can't stand it anymore, it does get long, and as an adult I have many daily duties, you know, so 50% of the time I get there after the introduction part and leave early. But I certainly always feel at peace when leaving. And the prayer routine always calms my mind although I am now very much inclined towards atheist thought, and I always mostly have scientific thoughts while observing how the believers act, I see the "superstitious pigeon" syndrome everywhere, and as you said, I feel above that flock of easily led sheep, but I don't feel guilty about it at all. That's good about Christianity, it's guilt-free now, since about two centuries ago, like it was in the first centuries of its existence. Just sharing my inner experience, without intention to invite anyone here to come pray at a church. Do so if you wish. Don't if you don't. It's Christianity, we don't do threats or emotional guilt tripping, at least not in my Orthodox church.
Growing up my dad regularly prayed (Christian) for hours everyday. It gave him peace. I think its basically meditating which is proven to give peace of mind.
I grew up Catholic, and even though i haven't had Mass be a regular thing for me in many years, I have found that my muscle memory and instinctual reaction to certain parts of the service were still there, similar to a part of your experience here.
We do some of our yoga classes at the local church here (not kidding, we rent it on some evenings), and I am kind of a Christian. Usually many people, mostly attractive women, everyone friendly. Find a bit of space, your yoga mat your little island, then relaxation, postures, breathing. At the end we all sit cross-legged and together sing the word 'peace' while holding 'ea' sound for 15-20 sec, the church resonating, everyone calm and focused.
@@locinolacolino1302 Some people believe that, I don't. Btw we never had any problems with the church, they let us practice yoga, and we never burn incense or do anything that might upset them in any way. So you see, when people are open-minded Satan tends to run away.
I remember growing up they used to say that we needed to cry during salah because it was so powerful but as someone who doesn't speak Arabic how am i supposed to be emotionally stricken by a man singing gibberish I don't understand
This comment is emotional, and you don't need to cry, that's just something YOUR parents told you, apply logic and reason please, not emotion and trauma.
I love you AA! I learn alot from you! Your videos are great. I learn English and critical thinking from your videos. I hv started learning about Islam as I keep seeing Christians converting to Islam being deceived by the dawah
good video! when i started to investigate islam i noticed that allah seemed more intimidating than the christian god that i grew up with. the latter is often portrayed as a loving father with infinite understanding capabilities. the devil is seldom mentioned. i used to have conversations with god that went "idk if you exist or not but anyway p.s. please send proof". that might be one reason why leaving religion wasn't such a big deal to me. i could literally sort it out with god himself 😂
bro, you literally described my experience as a kid with undiagnosed AD4K in church where I didn't believe in a single word. I was raised catholic by my father. I felt tense, uncomfortable and like fraud in church all throughout elementary school. except my problem wasn't that I wanted to believe but couldn't. the problem was I didn't believe but I didn't want to be rejected by my father, and felt like a liar because I was always pretending. Now that I deconstructed it all I like the practice once in a while and I somewhat believe, and I consider myself a catholic. thank you for creating this space and this channel 💕
I'm most at peace when I'm in quite mode and I'm happier connecting with nature. Long time ago when I was young and this getleman had told me seek for enlightment and you will find God. I stop going to a church because I felt out of place and I did not felt the love but being misunderstood and judge, so I told myself to know God is not necessary to go a certain church but God is with us and every where . He lives in our individual heart if you allow Him and accept Him.Anyway, God has given us a free agency to choose .Have a good day ! Aladdin and every one has a reason to walk away from a situation that is no longer serve us and healthy.
I think Christianity would be the same as Islam if it weren't for the Enlightenment . I feel that the Enlightenment for Islam is starting now. I have always been optimistic about the human species.
quick question from the outside of this space: so the mosque that is a couple blocks from my house recently put up signs on the doors marking men's and women's entrances. they went up during randamadan and unless i am wildly oblivious are new (there just printer paper). does anyone have any incite as to why they might have made that chnage?
I was wondering, for praying in a group in the mosque, am I correct in understanding that you can leave whenever you want? I used to go to an Anglican church (I’m not Christian anymore but there’s no hard feelings there for me) and I made the assumption that mosque prayers would also have a set start and end time that everyone follows? How do you determine when to leave?🤔 If you have any videos explaining how praying works for Islam (inside and out of the mosque) I’d gladly watch them! 🤗💖✨
It depends 2 things:first the number of times you do a move called a "rak3a" which is bowing while putting both of your hands on both of your knees. Every prayer has a certain number of rak3at (plural of rak3a). When the group finish the number of rak3at for the prayer they can leave. Second how many verses the imam recites. The length of a prayer usually determined by how many verses the imam recites before each rak3a. You aren't allowed to leave before the prayer finishes unless there's an emergency, or your mother called you, or you farted (sorry if this is inappropriate English isn't my native language 😭). You can leave anytime you want if you are among strangers but of course if the people in the mosque know you they would ask questions.
I am a Muslim and I.... this is probably the first time I felt so bad for a murtad. I was minding my business watching gaming videos and I just had to come back here... Especially since you love 'Islām and you grew up in Saʿūdī. I hate the Sa ʿūdī government as they are the supporters of America but I've been there and I really love the people may 'Allāh bless them. ’In šā’ Allāh one day... you will be guided... and you will come back to 'Islām... One day ’in šā’ Allāh. May 'Allāh guide you.
I appreciate this video. Thanks. I think religion is overwhelming emotional and that those are the issues that need to be addressed, not attempts to apply reason or rationality. Ideally appreciated you applying meditative practices to your order to maintain your sense of mind. Knowing what the words in the prayer meant made it much harder to do.
I tried going once to a historic mosque in my city during iftar. I dressed masculinely so obviously stuck out like a sore-thumb. But the experience led me to appreciate the human experience of giving. The aunties exchanged smiles with me and kept feeding me and that made me feel welcomed despite my exterior looks. It was nothing about faith, they could say I was totally covered from the light whatsoever. I'm not a believer of the religion, tho I am still curious of the entity responsible for everything. I also practiced the shalat during the visit, I mostly was focusing on how full I was from the iftar. I didn't stay behind after the prayer, it felt to me like I was visiting a community just to hang out and the praying was just out of spite of me being polite 😬
I believe religions/God was created to feel a sense of community. If a religion gets people to be more kind, create great Music, Arts and in general be more compassionate, there's no problem at all. It's a problem when a religion demands itself to be included in Politics/Policies of a country or makes them commit crimes and creates a delusion that they've done it in the name of their religion.
Kafir? Kafir what's that? I only know kefir! The grocery I just came home from has dozens if not hundreds of kefirs behind glas doors in the refrigerators lined up along the wall. But honestly, I never saw one of it walk around.😊
Please don't go there they can find you and kill you. You are so precious. We do need you sensibility and intelligence. Stay safe you are a greater writer than you can suppose. Don't waste your life nor your talent. Please. ❤❤❤
Funny, it is the opposite for me. First, I never really frequented mosques when i lived in a muslim country. At that time, it was a place for men, older men, and older women, not a poace for children or young women. The only mosque I have really been in the mosque in Mecca. I can't get in a mosque. I get very anxious, and I had a panic attack once. It was supposed to be a visit of the Abu Dhabi mosque, with my non-muslim friends, so it is not like I was going in to pray. I had prepared and convinced myself it would be fine, but as we were queueing to get in, the Adan started, and I just panicked, I couldn't do it. My friends went in, and i stayed outside, walked around...
It's crazy and expected how similar your experience with Islam is to my experience with Christianity as an ex-christian. I used to have anxious dreams about church as a Christian because of the ever present threat of hell. Sometime during my deconstruction, I had a dream where I walked around my home church and felt more free and peaceful than I had ever felt before as a Christian (Iron Maiden was also playing in the background 😂)
Tbh I miss the ritual/headspace of the salah, even alone, but I couldn't be listening to all those verses about non-believers are going to hell as a non-believer these days. I'm curious if people have found anything to replace that clearing their head kind of ritual in their day to day lives post-Islam?
Go to Mecca in Texas and do umrah there please. It's not worth risking your safety to go to a place where you can be identified and arrested for apostasy.
Shortly my personal background: born a Christian, not a regular practicing one though, recognising that all religions in this world at present are just signposts, to open peoples eyes to the possibility that God exists. My personal impression is that God is real due to personal experiences I actually had. Your video gives me the impression that through renouncing Islam you have grown much closer to reaching the goal of the religion you were born in, as you have realized that getting closer to God is not about doing the things your religion or even any religion tells you to do. That currently you consider yourself to be an atheist is irrelevant to wether God exists or not, yet it is clear that you think about God a lot. It seems it got you to think about what God really is about, as your process got you to realize that religions claiming knowing what God wants and thinks is the result of what has gone through huan minds and often as certainly not what God would want people to do for eternity as that would not make any sense. That you simply speak your own experience yet with love and respect for others gives me the impression that you're still open to the possible existence of God, yet then a God who is optimally open minded, guiding all of life in a very subtle way towards what Eastern religions describe as liberation (not needing to be born in this world again) through the growth of consciousness. A God who is actually your friend as well as a friend of all beings, without 'eternal judgement'. A living God, present deeply within all of us, regardless of anyones current state or level of consciousness and regardless of anyones belief system. When God does exist indeed, then God is alike something I just described, yet still much more beautiful than that in a way that I have not realized yet myself, beyond the wildest imagination of any regular human or even saint or prophet of any religion. An understanding God who deeply loves you, regardless of what you believe at present.
i hope one day i can process and deal with my religious trauma or deconstruct enough to the point where islam doesn't bring such extreme discomfort to me, it's been 3 years since i left and maybe I can't progress because I'm still closested to and living with my very muslim family, but I truely admire your journey, thank you for making these videos 💜
0:45 I, an ex Muslim, been told by my family to go umrah but I told them I'll do on one condition. That if I found a friend willing to go, I'll go with them. Guess what 😂 none of my muslim friends want to go. Specially the ones who been there before. I want to try it at least once in my life, but to think about it I never heard anyone talk about the experience in a positive mood.
The experience is beyond amazing! I have been there twice alhamdulilah My parents did Hajj 5 times and they said they will keep going as long as they are able to. Many Muslims have done hajj n umrah multiply times. Maybe your friends are broke n can’t offered the expense to go again ? Or maybe like u they have no believe but true believers will jump at the opportunity to go to umrah over n over again
@@BlueSkies336 we live in the gulf so it isn't expense problem but more of scheduling problem. Since the norm for us to go for three days, and most of us now don't even have two day weekends. But still, no one talks about it positively. The common thing they say that they are beating and crushed around the kaaba by nationalities I prefer not to mention.
I know one thing. If God exists, and he or she created us, then it must be a being that's greater than us. All that is greatest and most beautiful in us - love, courage, intelligence, wisdom, truthfulness, compassion, humility - God must represent these to an infinitely greater extent. So such God wouldn't be upset with you for using your reason, which is a God's gift. On the other hand if there's a god that doesn't represent what's most noble in us, who's a tyrant, wrathful, cruel, deceitful, unpredictable, sadistic... Who would want to spend their eternity in such presence? What sort of heaven could a being like that create? I call it the common sense theology 😊 Best of luck to you ❤
I worked with a muslim for many years. At one point they said they were trying to increase my devotion to Islam. I asked why and they replied it was because the after life is forever and this life is brief. This makes me wonder how much of their enjoyment of this life they are willing to give up. Do typical Imams look out for followers that get so devoted they are giving up happiness? Would an Imam recomend moderation in religious devotion?
It depends on the Imam. I have yet to meet an imam who asked for moderation. And if you follow Islam as it's meant to be followed, aka similar to a Salafi (look it up), that includes not listening to music, not consuming or doing art, not doing any sort of chit chat, doing the extra prayers beyond the mandatory ones and so on. One also has to ambush and unalive polytheists, and subdue Christians and Jews to pay jizya tax.
As a muslim, me and all the muslims just do the basic stuff, we still enjoy things such as music and art because we believe as long as it doesnt distract us from our faith, its halal
@@You-ye4xb good to hear. A friend who is am exmuslim told me about his family who are current Muslims also occasionally drink. But my question was more about what would an Imam do if he noticed a Muslim getting so serious they are giving up more and more of thing they enjoyed. Would they recommend moderation?
@@RayKosbythis is exactly what our religion teaches about what ur talking about : The Prophet (SAW) said: "Religion is very easy and whoever overburdens himself in his religion will not be able to continue in that way. So you should not be extremists, but try to be near to perfection and receive the good tidings that you will be rewarded." Sahih Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 2, Number 38
@@BlueSkies336 that says you self regulate. Keep going unless you feel overburdened. A few verses below it promises 700 times reward for each good deed and bad deeds counts as is. This is an incentive structure to do more. When a devotee is going too far is subjective. I can imagine one Imam saying a arbitrary. is going too far and another saying there is room for more devotion. I don't see a structure here.
10 000 likes ... Aladdin will go to mecca and do umrah.
@barney1942 insha'JESUS
@@LACHRYMA MashaJESUS, JESUSuAKBAR!
@barney1942رامين
@@polokucoch8112 Allah was only a prophet...
@@marc3dartist601 YES. I know that allah was only a prophet created by the original FALSE prophet mahamed.
Please don't go to Mecca. They might have you on a list.
wdym
He doesn’t show his face so how will they know
@@queenjackiecandoit Hacking his internet and collecting data.
@@queenjackiecandoit I think he shared before that some of his details were threatened to be leaked in the past? It might be out there
1300 souls lost to the the heat. Please don’t go there.
I’ve always had mixed feelings about Salah when I was Muslim. Sometimes when I wasn’t in the headspace to pray, it felt like a chore that I had to complete out of obligation. It didn’t help that I would often feel extreme guilt for treating Salah like a chore. On other days, especially on Fridays, it was a lot more enjoyable because of the ritual of preparation (showering, wuduu, putting on a nice ‘abaya, etc) as well as the social aspect of praying (praying with Muslims in my community, seeing friends and classmates at the masjid, etc). And because Arabic isn’t my native language, listening to Qur’an recitation was always enjoyable, until reading the Tafsir and critically examining the Qur’an. Listening to Qur’an recitation will never be the way it was…
I’m still closeted and not in a safe place to be openly ex-Muslim, so I pray and go to the masjid against my will. I’ll definitely need some space from Islamic rituals to be able to go to a masjid voluntarily someday. For now, I’ll use your tip and treat prayer like a meditation, at least temporarily so I don’t lose my sanity lol
😭😭 it's a chore.
Me . If u want to find wrong in islam u get wrong . If u are not open mind u will get miskate in islam. If u r open minded u will get truth in islam 😊
Good luck with leaving the closet (no pun).
Hang on in there.💪
Thanks for sharing your experience.
I'm in a similar situation. Unfortunately, I'm still living with my family and forced to pray and visit the mosque every friday against my will too since I can't 'come out' as an ex-muslim. But using the prayer as some sort of a meditation really helps. I can only recommend it to anyone with the same problem!
Ex-Christian but I thought I'd answer one of your questions anyways. I have attended Latin Mass before and I honestly found it mesmerizing. The priest spoke in a dramatic, flowing tone. The words were beautiful and even if a section droned on for awhile before we had to stand or kneel or do another action, it was like a weird meditation. I actually thought it was better than normal Mass in English. I have also heard it described as the priest seemingly casting magic spells which I think is pretty close to what I felt.
I also think you're touching on something interesting here. A lot of people who stay devout believers have some middle ground level of belief. A lot of people who leave religion were previously very passionate about it or never felt anything. I only left because too many bad things happened and my mom is a bit crazy. If I had grown up in a more normal family I would probably still be Christian. I liked the routine and the ritual, I hated the scrutiny and promise that everything I did would summon demons. It made mundane things like prayes horrifying for me. I went from being someone who considered becoming a nun to someone who practices an atheistic form of paganism to get in touch with my routine and ritual side. Most believers around me do the rituals because they want to do the right thing and believe in God because that was deeply ingrained in them. Religion isn't a big disruption to their lives really and it brings them some measure of peace. I always found that human element fascinating.
I never really liked the rituals and worship because I felt like they played on my emotions. Everything was there to appeal to my emotional state of mind. Even as a Christian I had recognized this.
As an ex-Christian now I think I would have stayed IF we were allowed to question the claims of the bible itself, accept nuance, and reject certain teachings which included things like whether atonement was necessary or if hell were even real. But the push by fundamentalists to just assert the certainty of their claims made it impossible to do so, and in doing so, the bible just became another book.
Christianity not only talk about heaven and hell and sin because Christianity already has The Way - The Truth and The Life on Jesus, but there is also important thing to talk about is humanity and salvation (love). Basically, this is the purpose of embracing Christianity, Catholic Christian especially. But I don't have any idea other community and person who applied ceremonial and Christianity activities. There are millions of "humanity" works could be done voluntarily by every individual as a Christian, serving to each other for example if you want to be really as a Christian who applying "love" the rule from Jesus.
@@CB66941 , once a Christian, always a Christian. You WERE a NOMINAL Christian. You called yourself an ex (former) Christian because you thought you were a christian. The fact is, you were born to a so called “Christian family” even if you don’t know what a “Christian “means.
spoken like a person who didn't grow up with the Latin mass lol. It's excruciatingly boring (especially for a child) when you know all the common parts by heart and you can't understand the ones that don't repeat. my favorite part was usually the two to three songs in my native language. only parts that could keep my attention.
Being Christian is having a relationship with Jesus christ ✝️ THAT'S THE MOST IMPORTANT THING . HOLY BIBLE TELL US THAT PRAYING AND WORSHIPPING BRINGS YOU CLOSER TO GOD .
i really enjoyed your perspective on talking about "the human experience" rather than finding every single flaw. Im in the same position, i no longer need to convince myself. Its all about getting by, and trying to be at peace with everyone.
feel the same way❤
"He is an awesome guy" my religious Muslim friend said this about you after I sent him a link to your channel.
i really resonate with the constant state of anxiety that prayer and islam put me in. This Jumuah i went to the mosque, and the sheikh said something like "fear Allah and his wrath and ask forgiveness from him", and I actually audibly chuckled. I guess god is angry at his believers for things he created them to do with his knowledge.
It says a lot about how "benevolent" this God is that "fear" is mentioned more than "love".
@@YEY0806 fear may or may not be mentioned more than love, but the fact that you must fear the one whose in hands is your life and soul sounds like an abusive relationship.
@@zayd8883 it really is, for even when I was muslim, I never felt at peace as some muslims would claim. I would always feel shit about myself and guilty whenever I thought badly about the religion or Allah. Abusive is the best way to describe it
As an ex-Muslim who never bothered to look up the ex-Muslim community until I stumbled upon Apostate Prophet a few months ago, I must say I think your videos are much better. You make them for ex-Muslims to cope with the loss of their faith, while AP just makes videos for non-Muslims to justify their hatred of Islam.
i mean theres very reasonable justification to hate that
@@physicsbear18 Not if you're part of religion that's just as bad.
@kalakauwa4665 Marxist religions?
Apostate prophet lol ? Seriously
@@Foshoo1 Yeah. I hated him so much, that I looked up r/exmuslim, just so I could complain about him.
Great video! I haven't been to a mosque for years but would be a different experience as an ex-muslim for sure.
" I don't have ADHD, I have AD4K..." Ahhahahaaa, fantastic.
Me, too, literally.
😂😭
Audhd 😂 - if I turned it to Aud4k Noone could recognize the term anymore 😂
Comment for the algorithm
Thank you for this video! I’m an ex-Christian atheist and I so deeply related to the way you described how you used to feel in a mosque when you were a believer. I felt the same way in church - preoccupied with this weight of the “eternal perspective” whether that was centered on my own salvation (which I constantly doubted), the salvation of others, or the apparent futility of any aspect of my life other than praying and proselytizing. The existential burden of my beliefs themselves, my doubts excluded, was so overwhelming for me in a way that it didn’t seem to be for other believers around me. It’s so interesting that was your experience as well.
I really enjoyed hearing what this experience was like for you, and it makes me want to learn more about Muslim and ex-Muslim experiences from a viewpoint that isn’t a bigoted Christian or xenophobic one but also doesn’t gloss over the flaws in the religion. Glad I found your channel!
He went believer-mode for us, guys.
Haha 😅. AA going back to lvl1 easy difficulty after beating the game on veteran mode.
@@hippityhoppitus Apostasy Speedrun (ANY%)
Me whenever my family comes to town.
Me . If u want to find wrong in islam u get wrong . If u are not open mind u will get miskate in islam. If u r open minded u will get truth in islam 😊
you should walk to masjidl haram, they said if you are kafeer, you wouldnt see the kabbah😂
Now that would be spooky
He’s not a kafir he’s a murtad. He is far worse than any normal kafir. May Allah curs him
Damn never heard of this , maybe it’s just people like you
@@ApostateAladdinPin. Me . If u want to find wrong in islam u get wrong . If u are not open mind u will get miskate in islam. If u r open minded u will get truth in islam 😊
My parents visited Mecca in the early '90's, and they saw the kabbah, and they are both ex-christian atheists.
I was never indoctrinated into any faith and in Sweden, religion is very private, and the practitioner chooses how much of it they want. But I recently at the tender age of 48 took in a Christian Sunday service for the first time, and it was intensely boring, and poorly attended. But I did notice that those in attendance did at least try to pay attention.
If you are ever in the USA, in the south, Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia. Go to a Baptist church sermon. It will not be boring
I was kid when my life was changed, a man (Christian pastor) came to the door at my house. He told me that God loved me so much he gave his only begotten son, etc. I believed, I confess with my mouth. The man prayed for me, he touched my forehead and I received the Holy Spirit. My heart changed, it was a spiritual experience and I felt the presence of God.
Boring and not boring it depends on the community themselves. Why didn't you make it to be lively then ?
I can relate to your experience on how peaceful it actually feels now to go to the Masjid. I recently had to attend a Jinazah prayer. In the past, it was a truly heartbreaking and traumatizing experience as you think of what this person may be dealing with once they're placed in the grave. I always felt people at islamic funerals cry for themselves as they think of similar fate that awaits them. They seem to cry out of fear for their loved ones more than their loss. It really is a cruel psychological state of being.
I'm Jewish and haven't done much in the way of Jewish practice in several years, though I grew up attending synagogue weekly and at one time was heavily involved with a local community. Your description of the muscle memory of the movement and words of the prayers resonated with me. The few times I've attended services in the past few years, my body knew what to do even as I felt kind of silly because I didn't really believe in or care much about what I was saying. The ritualistic and community/communal aspect of prayer is powerful. Thank you for sharing your experience!
What happened next will SHOCK you!
As a fellow ex-Muslim, I find 11:10 and 17:45 especially important to emphasize.
Yep. I'm a Nigerian ex-Muslim and until you and my non-muslim Arab friends explained the meaning of the verses of the quran, I enjoyed the way it was sung. I also enjoyed singing it too and thought it beautiful. Now that I know how much call to violence, call to intolerance and woman-hating there is, I can't enjoy it anymore.
I still don't know what any of it means though. It just doesn't impress me like it used to.
I'm happy you finally being enlightened free from religious indoctrination
Not equal are the good deed and the bad deed. Repel evil by that which is better, and then the one who is hostile to you will become as a devoted friend. SURAH FUSSILAT 41:34
You got lost in translation 😅.
I really hope you find your way back
@@timetraveler2026 your quran itself is a copy paste of Jewish talmudic source and heretical Christian gnostic sources
@@timetraveler2026
for every obvious good command in Quran......there are 3 horrible ones
i've been an exie for 4 years, but i've only just come across your videos.
your tonality and your words give me such peace and i feel safe while listening to your content.
you teach me tolerance and acceptance of other belief systems and their followers, while never invalidating my own.
as an exie in a 3rd world country, it's hardly ever that i feel safe and validated.
thank you for existing and thank you for taking the time to share such beautiful experiences and thoughts < 3
Really enjoyed hearing your perspective here, thanks for sharing!
👏🙂
I feel the same way when my family coarse me to go to mosque.
Great video
I compare this with when I go to church with my Mom when I am back with her ... usually once a year.
This is your best ever Aladdin.
happy 420
I am a woman. I went multiple times to a masque as an ex Muslim. I wore the hijab for that purpose but didn't pray. As a woman I could have had hyperion so it is not a big deal not praying. Anyway I only watched the others and remembered myself as a believer. I was comfortable cus I wasn't forced to be there. But I always felt a relief as I went out again.
i really appreciate how clearly you communicate your thoughts and feelings. it's a talent, for sure, but also a skill that needs practice and self reflection. as someone who values clarity in order to understand people on a deeper level, it's so refreshing, and i could listen to you go on for hours. i barely have to interpret what you're saying because you just tell everything straightforwardly. thanks
@15:26, you summed it up nicely, "it is no different from following a flow of crowd ...."
Once I was in restaurant in Hamtramck (city adjacent to Detroit), while eating our afternoon meal, the owner came and asked us to leave because just then there was a blare of Adaan from the nearly mosque.......That was the last time I ever went to that place.
As an ExChristian it was really interesting to hear your perspective on this before and after you deconstructed.
I never really felt fear of hell or anything while praying (my church didn't go too hard in that thankfully), my fear was mostly only I periods when I felt like I wasn't a real Christian
I haven't tried since
@davidcook7899 - I am a Christian. Hellfire is certainly preached by Christ himself, but that wasn't his entire ministry, and so, in my church, mostly, it was about the love of God and slightly on the judgment of God.
I remain a Christian since everything spoken in the Bible is true. Once you have verified that and I mean verified, you can never think of becoming an atheist or anything else. I mean, who would want to leave something they have clearly identified to be true as clear as day? None. Hence, I remain a Christian.
@@lifethroughromans8295 I'll definitely give you there are many varieties or Christianity that go all in in the hellfire. All you need to do for an older example is look at the apocalypse of Peter.
Jesus however likely didn't believe In hell. If you look at many of the references to hell in the bible it's translated from the word ghena which is actually a physical place in earth. There is still a clear idea of punishment and fire. But the idea of an eternal torture was likely adapted from greek and Roman mythology.
The bit thing for me at the time was despite believing in hell I only occasionally saw it as a threat directed at me.
@@lifethroughromans8295 Proof?
@@thorpeaaron1110
Np. There is a big fire at the earth's core. You're welcome.
Watched some of videos...your the best apostate Alaaaadiin 🎉🎉
The anxiety about all the others destined to go to hell and knowing that whatever I do would never be enough yet the one who could do something is the very one sending such people to hell, that's something I can relate to.
I've always felt guilty because I never felt anything good during religious practices, when many people around me were so expressive of how heavenly these things feel to them, I always thought I was not good enough, untill I finally figured out that I didn't believe in all these things fully, I always had lingering suspensions in the back of my mind, and when I decided to resolve these suspicions, I completely disbelieved
Well I always have to greet mosques, because of my family ughhhhh.....
I understand how frustrating that must feel. What do you think about what I said around 14:08?
stand for what you believe for lol ? non-muslims are definitely the biggest cowards on this planet
@@ApostateAladdin Honestly a good life hack until i get out of my house.
Thank you for your effort man ! My mother used to take me to pray with her in Ramadan, I didn't have a choice it was a must. So, what kept me sane during those years of praying is my imagination. I would imagine things in details like the carpets color and shapes, the wooden design or something like imagining my life without praying. I used this time for meditation, day dreaming, and planning until I finally put my plans into actions and created a life for me without musts.
In my childhood and teenage years in church, i very much enjoyed the singing, but nothing else. Prayers annoyed me because I had a strong distaste for being made to put on an act by folding my hands, shutting my eyes, bowing down my head, listening to and reciting words that meant nothing to me. During the sermon and the rest of the service i would thumb through a Bible while thinking about far more enjoyable things such as comic books, animated cartoons, novels and stories whose heroes i really liked, not the ones in th Bible. For many years, into my teens, I did expect that one day i would finally "see the light" and have "true faith". I imagined the "Holy Ghost" or a child-angel who hopefully would be a girl about my age, would fly down from heaven to greet me, then up in the blue sky i would see a beautiful staircase made of puffy white clouds with rainbows and sparkly jewels and maybe I would get to climb it, or if not that, i would have a profound dream or daytime vision that would cause my mind to be transformed. The whole world would look different, and my life would change in profound and beautiful ways. Nothing like that ever happened though! In all those years pondering what my anticipated faith would be like, I cared nothing about either "God" nor "Jesus". My indifference to them didn't trouble me at all since i was sure having faith would change that. Many years later, on rare occasions while visiting believing relatives, i would attend church again, and once again i still enthusiastically enjoyed the singing, especially of old hymns I still fondly remembered, but otherwise my mind still wandered off to more interesting topics.
So so relatable
@@rsmlinar1720 There should be a church where it's all singing. Even as an atheist, i'd go! 😇
@@deewesthill1213 Isn't that what Megachurches and Non Denoms are like
@@deewesthill1213 😇😃😃😃
Christianity not only talk about heaven and hell and sin because Christianity already has The Way - The Truth and The Life on Jesus, but there is also important thing to talk about is humanity and salvation (love). Basically, this is the purpose of embracing Christianity, Catholic Christian especially. But I don't have any idea other community and person who applied ceremonial and Christianity activities. There are millions of "humanity" works could be done voluntarily by every individual as a Christian, serving to each other for example if you want to be really as a Christian who applying "love" the rule from Jesus. Might be someone know better. 😃😃
S tier plot twist.
7:50 kind of a stupid point. The quran does not say to abandon this life completely to not enjoy what allah has blessed us with, to live a full life, it simply says ontop of all of that know who your lord is and obey his commands.
I appreciate you talking about this. I probably won't go to a mosque anytime soon.
From my memory of when I did go.. I always rotated to looking at the carpet patterns and then imagining my prayers reaching god, where our sujood together will create this awesome invisible beam, granting us good points.
And then I stare at the person in front of me and think "Oh no, your foot is peeking out, but that's not on purpose so I'm sure god will accept your prayer!"
Stuff like that.. 😵
Did you know that April is Arab America heritage month? I don't know how to embrace an Arab identity as an apostate. It's difficult to connect as a kafir.
Arab culture ain't Muslim culture. As an Indian ex Muslim, it's hard to reconcile my love for the Hindu culture that brought us here whilst also knowing the existence of Hindu fascists ruining my home so I do understand, but familiarizing myself with Buddhism and hindu philosophy helped me make the disconnect. You should read pre Islamic poetry and history, especially if I'm not mistaken that Arab civilization is one of the oldest with mesopotamia. But maybe it goes deeper and if that's the case I'm sorry, hope you figure stuff out
@@cheezburger2000 Arabs are a Near East culture, which means their origins are connected to Mesopotamia. But they're a younger culture than societies like Kanaan, or even the ancient Israelites. At least that is my understanding. Modern Egyptians are also Arab.
I often go to the local mosque when I am in another city , though I am not a believer! Because Its a great place for a brief rest, to freshen up or even to "relieve " oneself ( all for free ) 🙂 ! In my opinion, that is also the added attraction about mosques for believers too . ! It is not just about doing the prayers ! 🙂
Hope you're enjoying all the Eastern Orthodox architecture the Muslims appropriated, you're welcome.
9:42 ironically yeah. you hit the mark. Yeah somehow after loosening a bit from religion doctrine. you feel more ease. The pressure to put more and more people into own religion dissipates...
this was me during this eid😂😂
This are interesting perspectives. I kinda relate like per example wandering thoughts during a service (But I do enjoy prayer movements, more then I did earlier, it gives me peace!🤲🏽)
I dont like mosque inside but outside they are amazing architecture I love it
Yeah because inside it smells like smoke and feet
Some are amazing. The works of man.
That's because they stole Eastern Orthodox architecture, Hagia Sophia still has Icons of Jesus and the Saints that remain even after Islamic Ottoman occupation.
Wow, your recent positive inner experience at the mosque actually matches exactly the inner experience of how Christians feel inside when attending church.
Everything you described, primarily going out of one's own need and choice, not out of duty or fear. And that changes everything.
We feel we have the right to be there. We feel accepted the way we are, flaws and all, whether we're imperfect and clumsy and awkward in our prayer or not. We are told God loves us just the way we are and wants us there, and is happy to receive us in his "house".
I get distracted all the time in my thoughts, but I have never felt guilty for it. I am always the only one with my head up looking around at the beautiful art on the ceiling, the sculptures or icons left and right, and whispering "hi" to friends and neighbors I recognize at the Liturgy.
It's really a different world, being a Christian.
And I always leave the church whenever I can't stand it anymore, it does get long, and as an adult I have many daily duties, you know, so 50% of the time I get there after the introduction part and leave early. But I certainly always feel at peace when leaving. And the prayer routine always calms my mind although I am now very much inclined towards atheist thought, and I always mostly have scientific thoughts while observing how the believers act, I see the "superstitious pigeon" syndrome everywhere, and as you said, I feel above that flock of easily led sheep, but I don't feel guilty about it at all.
That's good about Christianity, it's guilt-free now, since about two centuries ago, like it was in the first centuries of its existence.
Just sharing my inner experience, without intention to invite anyone here to come pray at a church. Do so if you wish. Don't if you don't. It's Christianity, we don't do threats or emotional guilt tripping, at least not in my Orthodox church.
I love how you describe what you saw others doing during prayer!
Me every day during ramadan! And every friday!! Well, officially at least.... 😏
Great video! Thanks for sharing
I either meditate and/or spit Eminem lyrics when I have to pray
Thank you for sharing this, it was very inspirational and it made me as an ex-christian think that maybe I can do this too one day.
Growing up my dad regularly prayed (Christian) for hours everyday. It gave him peace. I think its basically meditating which is proven to give peace of mind.
I grew up Catholic, and even though i haven't had Mass be a regular thing for me in many years, I have found that my muscle memory and instinctual reaction to certain parts of the service were still there, similar to a part of your experience here.
We do some of our yoga classes at the local church here (not kidding, we rent it on some evenings), and I am kind of a Christian. Usually many people, mostly attractive women, everyone friendly. Find a bit of space, your yoga mat your little island, then relaxation, postures, breathing. At the end we all sit cross-legged and together sing the word 'peace' while holding 'ea' sound for 15-20 sec, the church resonating, everyone calm and focused.
Yoga's literally Satanic.
@@locinolacolino1302 Some people believe that, I don't. Btw we never had any problems with the church, they let us practice yoga, and we never burn incense or do anything that might upset them in any way. So you see, when people are open-minded Satan tends to run away.
hindu practices in a church? that's new
I appreciate your voice. It's not hateful but factual.
I remember growing up they used to say that we needed to cry during salah because it was so powerful but as someone who doesn't speak Arabic how am i supposed to be emotionally stricken by a man singing gibberish I don't understand
This comment is emotional, and you don't need to cry, that's just something YOUR parents told you, apply logic and reason please, not emotion and trauma.
“Breathing meditation “ I like that 👍👍👍
It is a step towards enlightenment.🙏🙏🙏
I love you AA! I learn alot from you! Your videos are great. I learn English and critical thinking from your videos. I hv started learning about Islam as I keep seeing Christians converting to Islam being deceived by the dawah
I believe in your mission! ❤❤❤
You’re such a beautiful human being ❤
good video! when i started to investigate islam i noticed that allah seemed more intimidating than the christian god that i grew up with. the latter is often portrayed as a loving father with infinite understanding capabilities. the devil is seldom mentioned. i used to have conversations with god that went "idk if you exist or not but anyway p.s. please send proof". that might be one reason why leaving religion wasn't such a big deal to me. i could literally sort it out with god himself 😂
I don't have ADHD I have AD4K XDDD
That must have been some strange experience. If you go on hadj you take big risk. Better dont
Thanks!
Thank you so much!
bro, you literally described my experience as a kid with undiagnosed AD4K in church where I didn't believe in a single word. I was raised catholic by my father. I felt tense, uncomfortable and like fraud in church all throughout elementary school. except my problem wasn't that I wanted to believe but couldn't. the problem was I didn't believe but I didn't want to be rejected by my father, and felt like a liar because I was always pretending.
Now that I deconstructed it all I like the practice once in a while and I somewhat believe, and I consider myself a catholic.
thank you for creating this space and this channel 💕
3:07 lmao same
I'm most at peace when I'm in quite mode
and I'm happier connecting with nature.
Long time ago when I was young and this
getleman had told me seek for enlightment
and you will find God. I stop going to a church
because I felt out of place and I did not felt the love
but being misunderstood and judge, so I told myself
to know God is not necessary to go a certain church but
God is with us and every where . He lives in our individual heart
if you allow Him and accept Him.Anyway, God has given us a free agency
to choose .Have a good day ! Aladdin and every one has a reason to walk
away from a situation that is no longer serve us and healthy.
As an ex Christian this mirrors my experiences attending church even though the Catholic Church didn't constantly preach hellfire.
I think Christianity would be the same as Islam if it weren't for the Enlightenment .
I feel that the Enlightenment for Islam is starting now. I have always been optimistic about the human species.
quick question from the outside of this space: so the mosque that is a couple blocks from my house recently put up signs on the doors marking men's and women's entrances. they went up during randamadan and unless i am wildly oblivious are new (there just printer paper). does anyone have any incite as to why they might have made that chnage?
To make sure men and women didn't accidentally mingle.
I was wondering, for praying in a group in the mosque, am I correct in understanding that you can leave whenever you want? I used to go to an Anglican church (I’m not Christian anymore but there’s no hard feelings there for me) and I made the assumption that mosque prayers would also have a set start and end time that everyone follows? How do you determine when to leave?🤔 If you have any videos explaining how praying works for Islam (inside and out of the mosque) I’d gladly watch them! 🤗💖✨
It depends 2 things:first the number of times you do a move called a "rak3a" which is bowing while putting both of your hands on both of your knees. Every prayer has a certain number of rak3at (plural of rak3a). When the group finish the number of rak3at for the prayer they can leave.
Second how many verses the imam recites. The length of a prayer usually determined by how many verses the imam recites before each rak3a.
You aren't allowed to leave before the prayer finishes unless there's an emergency, or your mother called you, or you farted (sorry if this is inappropriate English isn't my native language 😭). You can leave anytime you want if you are among strangers but of course if the people in the mosque know you they would ask questions.
@@Fox2000xx It’s okay, that wasn’t inappropriate! 🤗 thank you for explaining, I really appreciate you taking the time for me 😇✨
more power to you man
I am a Muslim and I.... this is probably the first time I felt so bad for a murtad. I was minding my business watching gaming videos and I just had to come back here...
Especially since you love 'Islām and you grew up in Saʿūdī.
I hate the Sa ʿūdī government as they are the supporters of America but I've been there and I really love the people may 'Allāh bless them.
’In šā’ Allāh one day... you will be guided... and you will come back to 'Islām... One day ’in šā’ Allāh.
May 'Allāh guide you.
@@jjihadi_nobita stop watching these videos of ignorant ex-muslims that make that there user name
I appreciate this video. Thanks. I think religion is overwhelming emotional and that those are the issues that need to be addressed, not attempts to apply reason or rationality. Ideally appreciated you applying meditative practices to your order to maintain your sense of mind.
Knowing what the words in the prayer meant made it much harder to do.
It's not a good idea going for umrah. You can be caught and punished. Because your real name is well known.
that fart makes me creazy
I tried going once to a historic mosque in my city during iftar. I dressed masculinely so obviously stuck out like a sore-thumb. But the experience led me to appreciate the human experience of giving. The aunties exchanged smiles with me and kept feeding me and that made me feel welcomed despite my exterior looks. It was nothing about faith, they could say I was totally covered from the light whatsoever. I'm not a believer of the religion, tho I am still curious of the entity responsible for everything. I also practiced the shalat during the visit, I mostly was focusing on how full I was from the iftar. I didn't stay behind after the prayer, it felt to me like I was visiting a community just to hang out and the praying was just out of spite of me being polite 😬
I believe religions/God was created to feel a sense of community.
If a religion gets people to be more kind, create great Music, Arts and in general be more compassionate, there's no problem at all.
It's a problem when a religion demands itself to be included in Politics/Policies of a country or makes them commit crimes and creates a delusion that they've done it in the name of their religion.
Kafir? Kafir what's that?
I only know kefir! The grocery I just came home from has dozens if not hundreds of kefirs behind glas doors in the refrigerators lined up along the wall.
But honestly, I never saw one of it walk around.😊
My favourite lactose beverage 🥛
Kafir is non muslim
Please don't go there they can find you and kill you. You are so precious. We do need you sensibility and intelligence. Stay safe you are a greater writer than you can suppose. Don't waste your life nor your talent. Please. ❤❤❤
Please dont do that again? If one notices u somehow they will attack!
Funny, it is the opposite for me. First, I never really frequented mosques when i lived in a muslim country. At that time, it was a place for men, older men, and older women, not a poace for children or young women. The only mosque I have really been in the mosque in Mecca. I can't get in a mosque. I get very anxious, and I had a panic attack once. It was supposed to be a visit of the Abu Dhabi mosque, with my non-muslim friends, so it is not like I was going in to pray. I had prepared and convinced myself it would be fine, but as we were queueing to get in, the Adan started, and I just panicked, I couldn't do it. My friends went in, and i stayed outside, walked around...
1.6k
if we get 10k stay safe, but it would make cool content
amazing video/thamk you
I’m Christian and fully believing but I love your channel and your perspective on life and realities of life that you’ve lived ❤❤
It's crazy and expected how similar your experience with Islam is to my experience with Christianity as an ex-christian. I used to have anxious dreams about church as a Christian because of the ever present threat of hell. Sometime during my deconstruction, I had a dream where I walked around my home church and felt more free and peaceful than I had ever felt before as a Christian (Iron Maiden was also playing in the background 😂)
Tbh I miss the ritual/headspace of the salah, even alone, but I couldn't be listening to all those verses about non-believers are going to hell as a non-believer these days. I'm curious if people have found anything to replace that clearing their head kind of ritual in their day to day lives post-Islam?
nothing annoyes me more thatn making wudu seriusly
The dunya called upon him "how do you forget my memorizes?" He said "I don't want you a homeland for in the sky is all I ask for"
This sounds fun. I wanna travel to a luxury exclusive mosque for the experience
Go to Mecca in Texas and do umrah there please. It's not worth risking your safety to go to a place where you can be identified and arrested for apostasy.
However beautiful mosques are, I am very afraid getting close to one. I do not feel this way when being close to any other religous buildings.
Let’s get him to Mecca people!!
what no hidden cam tf
Aladdin, where is the magic carpet?
Shortly my personal background: born a Christian, not a regular practicing one though, recognising that all religions in this world at present are just signposts, to open peoples eyes to the possibility that God exists. My personal impression is that God is real due to personal experiences I actually had.
Your video gives me the impression that through renouncing Islam you have grown much closer to reaching the goal of the religion you were born in, as you have realized that getting closer to God is not about doing the things your religion or even any religion tells you to do.
That currently you consider yourself to be an atheist is irrelevant to wether God exists or not, yet it is clear that you think about God a lot.
It seems it got you to think about what God really is about, as your process got you to realize that religions claiming knowing what God wants and thinks is the result of what has gone through huan minds and often as certainly not what God would want people to do for eternity as that would not make any sense.
That you simply speak your own experience yet with love and respect for others gives me the impression that you're still open to the possible existence of God, yet then a God who is optimally open minded, guiding all of life in a very subtle way towards what Eastern religions describe as liberation (not needing to be born in this world again) through the growth of consciousness. A God who is actually your friend as well as a friend of all beings, without 'eternal judgement'. A living God, present deeply within all of us, regardless of anyones current state or level of consciousness and regardless of anyones belief system. When God does exist indeed, then God is alike something I just described, yet still much more beautiful than that in a way that I have not realized yet myself, beyond the wildest imagination of any regular human or even saint or prophet of any religion. An understanding God who deeply loves you, regardless of what you believe at present.
i hope one day i can process and deal with my religious trauma or deconstruct enough to the point where islam doesn't bring such extreme discomfort to me, it's been 3 years since i left and maybe I can't progress because I'm still closested to and living with my very muslim family, but I truely admire your journey, thank you for making these videos 💜
😭Cmon guy 10k not that hard
Great channel and love your content
0:45 I, an ex Muslim, been told by my family to go umrah but I told them I'll do on one condition. That if I found a friend willing to go, I'll go with them. Guess what 😂 none of my muslim friends want to go. Specially the ones who been there before. I want to try it at least once in my life, but to think about it I never heard anyone talk about the experience in a positive mood.
The experience is beyond amazing! I have been there twice alhamdulilah
My parents did Hajj 5 times and they said they will keep going as long as they are able to. Many Muslims have done hajj n umrah multiply times. Maybe your friends are broke n can’t offered the expense to go again ? Or maybe like u they have no believe but true believers will jump at the opportunity to go to umrah over n over again
@@BlueSkies336 we live in the gulf so it isn't expense problem but more of scheduling problem. Since the norm for us to go for three days, and most of us now don't even have two day weekends. But still, no one talks about it positively. The common thing they say that they are beating and crushed around the kaaba by nationalities I prefer not to mention.
I know one thing. If God exists, and he or she created us, then it must be a being that's greater than us. All that is greatest and most beautiful in us - love, courage, intelligence, wisdom, truthfulness, compassion, humility - God must represent these to an infinitely greater extent. So such God wouldn't be upset with you for using your reason, which is a God's gift.
On the other hand if there's a god that doesn't represent what's most noble in us, who's a tyrant, wrathful, cruel, deceitful, unpredictable, sadistic... Who would want to spend their eternity in such presence? What sort of heaven could a being like that create?
I call it the common sense theology 😊 Best of luck to you ❤
Thanks ❤
As an ex-christian with AD4K, I find myself relating a lot with your story.
I worked with a muslim for many years. At one point they said they were trying to increase my devotion to Islam. I asked why and they replied it was because the after life is forever and this life is brief. This makes me wonder how much of their enjoyment of this life they are willing to give up. Do typical Imams look out for followers that get so devoted they are giving up happiness?
Would an Imam recomend moderation in religious devotion?
It depends on the Imam. I have yet to meet an imam who asked for moderation.
And if you follow Islam as it's meant to be followed, aka similar to a Salafi (look it up), that includes not listening to music, not consuming or doing art, not doing any sort of chit chat, doing the extra prayers beyond the mandatory ones and so on. One also has to ambush and unalive polytheists, and subdue Christians and Jews to pay jizya tax.
As a muslim, me and all the muslims just do the basic stuff, we still enjoy things such as music and art because we believe as long as it doesnt distract us from our faith, its halal
@@You-ye4xb good to hear. A friend who is am exmuslim told me about his family who are current Muslims also occasionally drink.
But my question was more about what would an Imam do if he noticed a Muslim getting so serious they are giving up more and more of thing they enjoyed. Would they recommend moderation?
@@RayKosbythis is exactly what our religion teaches about what ur talking about :
The Prophet (SAW) said:
"Religion is very easy and whoever overburdens himself in his religion will not be able to continue in that way. So you should not be extremists, but try to be near to perfection and receive the good tidings that you will be rewarded."
Sahih Bukhari, Volume 1, Book 2, Number 38
@@BlueSkies336 that says you self regulate. Keep going unless you feel overburdened. A few verses below it promises 700 times reward for each good deed and bad deeds counts as is. This is an incentive structure to do more. When a devotee is going too far is subjective. I can imagine one Imam saying a arbitrary. is going too far and another saying there is room for more devotion. I don't see a structure here.