Women Set Their Standard, Men Get With The Program
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ต.ค. 2024
- #highstandards #femininity #dating
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💯 a lot of women complain at the low efforts, they think the men who do good are unicorns but its simple. Set the standard and they will meet it and if not you do NOT entertain him
This. Because men will get it the fuck together if a woman they really desire has standards they don’t meet.
simple!🎯
Facts couldn’t agree more
Except the standard is only set for the nice guy. The rules were made for the guy she doesn't like. This is why nice guys walked away. Because women demand to be princesses for the simp but will bust it down outside a McDonald's in a Ford focus for tyrone. Keep the energy for everyone and dating practices will change. Until then . Steve the accountant will not wife tyrones sloppy seconds nor should he. Men are not blameless in this but my comment can only be from my experiences with women . Won't be manipulated by a woman who saw fit to drag me over the coals while my predecessor didn't have to do half the effort
@@MM-hf6om how can you tell if a woman was Tyrone sloppy seconds? especially if she childless.
Back in college, I had low standards and I had low self esteem. I grew up in a toxic abusive household. My mom was verbally and physically abusive to me. She also did not let me date when I was a teen and she taught me to be independent like her. I had to learn the hard way from experience. I was used, harassed, cheated on, and I ended up being SA’d. I use to date broke dusty men who drained me for all I had and gave nothing in return. That’s when I took a good look at myself. I started going to therapy and I thought about what do I want for myself and what I want in a relationship. I started setting standards for what I want out of a man. Now I’m in a healthy relationship.
Leveled up on em’! Absolutely love this Queen thank you for sharing. Keep elevating. 💜✨💕
Wow! Thank you for sharing. Your story is very similar to mine. 💙
Awww congratulations 🎊 I pray I get this too
your story is also similar to mine 😅 i’m in a healthy relationship with a white boy and his parents love me 🥺
Amazing. Good for you
I am absolutely mortified with embarrassment of how I allow myself to be treated‼️ My standards are beyond high now…not only for my future husband but friendship, family members & job.
We have all been there trust me. I cringe at my past but if we knew better I truly believe we would have done better!
@@EarCandyAsmrAbsolutely‼️❤️
Me too but hey ya know better ya do betta!*💕✨💕
Same
Same but and i learned early. I was so insecure due to how i was raised and it makes sense why i went through what i went through as a teenager. I learned early on and fast because something always felt off about how everyone else around me was living. Till this day my father is a worthless piece of a man and my mother hasn’t chosen any better. Im grateful I broke out of that and I pray so many other black women do. You’re not alone girl lets move forward now!
An observation I made with men and women is that women will typically lower their standards for men they really want, while men will work to meet the standards of a woman they really want. You think your standards are too high until a man comes across a woman he really wants with those same standards, best believe those standards aren’t too high then and he will get right. Definitely not all, but this is something I’ve seen and noticed ALOT, I’ve also experienced it once myself.
Agreed, I always thought my standard were pretty high until I met the last guy I had relations with, because I liked him so much I lowered them A LOT. Now I’m picking up the pieces smh
@@shyannleah5945 You are too beautiful for that. Glad you picked up your crown 👑
This! 🎯
Yesssss
Facts. Never thought of it that way
Having standard as a black woman👸🏽 definitely save me from a lot of toxic cruel undeserving people. I’ve been called uppity snotty prissy all that by literally everyone that encounter me.I choose to set a standard in me that no one will take away from.
I always say there is no power in being a victim. When you have a victim mindset, you forfeit your control over the outcome of your life. When you take accountability off of you, and put it on someone else, you are leaving it up to that person to decide your fate.
🎯
💎💎💎
Being around people like this becomes emotionally draining.
@@Spokentruths725 💯
You mam, are very wise 🗣🔥
I ended a situationship I was in for a year. I’m exhausted but I realize I did it to myself. I’m happy that I’m realizing I need to do better. Ladies, we set the bar! It may feel a little lonely but it’s better to be firm than waiver
Now this is what true accountability looks like. Having high standards helps you weed out the tares from the wheat. They try to shame and guilt trip you for having standards but my non-negotiables are non-negotiable for a reason. Standards are like kryptonite to dusties.. 😅
Facts and if he can’t meet them he will get mad and try to make you lower them STAY UP LADIES ‼️‼️
Exactly standing up for yourself is important. Not falling for his trap easily. Especially if he says "you will die alone", ignore him.
Girllll your channel is a blessing, me and my mom aren’t close and I have no sisters, close aunts, nothing. I love your channel so much and I will always support you ! THANK YOU
💜💜💜✨
Sending you love❤️
Sending you love❤️
Lol I was just saying how she's like a big cousin. This page reeks of motherly energy.
Yesss she is a blessing!*💕
This is the one sis‼️‼️‼️ I'm currently in the process of breaking up with a man who does not meet my standards. He's of course trying to talk me into staying and I'm telling him that I've actually stayed too long because I've never allowed the bare minimum and idk why I started. If he really loves me like he say he does, he'll step up in a major way but if not, I'm good still. I'm a great catch (toots my own horn lol)! Side note: this video is 7 minutes and 28 seconds which is my birthday 🥳💕 this is a sign 💫
❤️❤️❤️✨
@@WildheartWaves 🥰🥰🥰🥰
wowww..I'm in a similar situation.. I can only blame myself smh. I feel his actions aren't matching up with what he told me he would do. I really have strong feelings for him. But I'm too old for this. Good luck girl!!
I'm currently in college and have sent your videos to all my closest girlfriends. We listen to you drag us all the time. I never heard a lot of the things you've said on here before growing up and the videos have helped and continue to give guidance as we've already been through many bad experiences relating to men. We want to stop these bad habits before we're too late. Love these so much and admire how firm you are in your knowledge and beliefs!!
I can totally relate to this..in college you assume its normal to do some things but this channel has really helped
also a college student and these videos have changed my life forever
Watch Neema Speaks channel as well!!!
This goes for all types of relationships! Even friends!
Please don’t stop making your content. You don’t know is watching and who needs to hear your words to know to remember one’s values and to know when to walk away. Thank you so so much.
Please please make more videos. I believe a lot of black women can benefit from your content. The advice you give is crucially important to the growth of black women.
Yes it’s a internal struggle from unprocessed trauma, the way they grew up and not being taught standards. I now have standards and I won’t accept anything. Your channel has also been helping me heal and put my standards higher.
Girl you got me crying right now because I going through the healing process right now and it's hard because I could tell you some stories about my life and dating life from me chasing love from lust to dealing with being the side chick at one point and time but I'm focusing on me & my goals no sex in 2 yrs now I'm trying to make it past that I'm in medical school full time working on my career Im keeping the most high always first over everything 💯
May the Lord cover you and bless you in all you do. And don't be sad. You are not alone ❤️
@@KeepTheFaith00 thank you ❤️
@@vaughnettemonroe283 No problem! 💕
Healing is so hard but it is very necessary,I have been celibate also, not giving up my body
I found your channel not to long ago. And I just wanted to say hearing you speak such truth has begun to change my mindset and has changed the way I see MYSELF.
It gave me the courage to walk out a relationship in which my partner had lied by omission about a child he had with a random woman. I was grieving that relationship but stayed for nearly 8 months. All the while knowing deep down inside I deserved more. My standards were on the ground. It was me that allowed him to lie to me, it was me who forgave his pleas for forgiveness and it was me who allowed him to reap the benefits of my love and sincerity all the while I was getting baby momma drama and filth in return.
Thank you sm for your words, they’ve smacked me right back into reality.
I appreciate you for sharing this & I’m so glad that you are enjoying the content. You’ve recognized your worth & as a result understand that this situation is no longer serving you. Sending some love your way… continue on your journey towards healing… you deserve it! 🙏🏽💜✨
Summer literally wanted this life she likes confusion
Once a man know you’ll stick around for anything he going put you thru just that.
Cut my music off to listen😂 I love your videos!
no-one on earth should ever get the name "Larry" tattooed on their face
😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂😂😂😂😂
I find it crazy how a lot of women get mad when the man they are in a relationship with men that is doing them wrong when they should’ve set the standard of what they willing to tolerate and not tolerate from the man from the very beginning and that’s why it is important to have standards cause at the end of the day we teach people how to treat us based on the standards and values we have set for ourselves. Also if the man or people in general don’t fit your standards or values it is important to remove them Asap no if ands or buts .No disrespect I love summer Walker but to me she takes no accountability for the choices she made and being a habitual baby mama instead of raising her children with a man that is dependable, stable and so on and so forth
Having high standards, is a reflection of how much love , dignity and self respect you have for yourself and it will also save you from having low quality experiences with these baddies . Never ever lower your standards because that’s how you cheapen your value . As Wildheartwaves said “A pearl is the most desired gem because it’s rare to find” and although pearls are the most desirable gem stones , it’s not easy to get access to it because of how high it is in value . No matter how much pearls are high in demand they will never decrease in value and this is how we should be with our standards as women 🤍
Talk to them!! ❤
CLASS IN SESSION..
BE 🤫...Note-taking Time 📝.... Here's a pen 🖊 😉
I always rewatch the boundaries videos when I need a reminder … so good✨
I'm a man and I approve this message
My bar is higher then me and I’m pretty high rn🤣great video as always
Lololol
I went through a situationship.
I went two years abstinent before I met him. After experiencing a heart ache. I told myself the next person I give myself to will be the one. My grandma had passed and I relocated. Met him at work, and I'm never usually attracted to men but the moment I walked in the room I felt this intense connection. We ended up crying together, praying together, talked everyday on the phone for hours. Off & at work. He really was courting me. Then we had XXX and everything changed. He started giving me the bare minimal even after me expressing my love language. I did so much for him, he'd get mad a verbally abuse me when he didn't get his way. Use the silent treatment towards me and I didn't understand it! He said he was a man of God and I had hopes his principles met his word. He constantly said he wanted a life with me while his actions showed different. Then he stopped calling me on weekends. His excuse was his kids or he was sleep. Then he never wanted to see me unless it was at work! So I told him our relationship did not fulfill me. He became enraged! Instead of talking it out he blocked me.....6 months of lost time. I'm learning I really need to know for sure because I just assume based off of "connection" or "butterfly" feelings. The butterfly feeling is DEFINITELY A WARNING sign. Starting over my abstinence.... and don't plan to date anytime soon. Probably will go another two years to rejuvenate my spirit. I won't let a man disappoint me twice. Even if he did come back I won't forgive him. How are you 40 years old I'm 28 and I'm more mature than you? Crazy! In the beginning you'd think God himself dropped him off....then he just turned unjustly. It's crazy there's people who really make sense of their madness.
& when I expressed his lack of effort he's yelled at me like a wildebeest and said I HAVE KIDS, I HAVE NO SUPPORT. YOU HAVE SUPPORT ETC. using his work as a reason to why he's inconsistent. I wasn't asking for the world, just some time in-between that wasn't at work! He doesn't even have his kids full-time!
There's full-time mothers that make it work!
I didn't care if it was once a month but out of 6 months I got nothing!
I don't know if it was me mourning my loss of my grandma and a child hood friend that passed shortly after. But I started drinking heavy which also clouded my judgment.
10 days sober, 10 days no contact.
I feel a sense of relief and just want to move on from my ignorant decisions.
I've had alot of great men in my life, as far as friends or just men in the family so I know what I would want from someone I'm interested in. I just was dumb and caught a soul tie. And blinded myself from there the drinks didn't make it no better. Sober me would never allow someone to belittle me or treat me like a work heaux.... I was just in a bad space.
Venting. Thanks for the video.
SZA dropped now Wildheart!!! What a way to end the week ❤️❤️
Exactly it gets me when men say my standards are high but my standards are so normal to me. They are far from ridiculous the bar is just so low.
Exactly!!! 💗💗✨
I love this channel.
I see this in reverse though. Men set the standard and women get with the program. The person getting with the program is the follower
See this only works if your treat yourself how you would expect a man or your future husband to treat you, take yourself to fancy dinners, buy flowers to be sent to your house, take weekend getaways go all out for YOURSELF thts really important if you want justified expectations
But what do you have to offer the man to make YOU worthy of all of those things? Women don't want love they want material things that don't matter and that's why alot of men are MGTOW.
@@bkkersey93 u sound like a man who doesn't understand woman but to keep it simple if a man finds me worthy enough to love then what I find worthy in myself and what he finds worthy in me will not be the same things, ive had a man love me for my personality and im think im worthy to love because I cook but he found my worth in my energy it just varies
I def didn’t have strong standards! But I have definitely strengthened them
Giirllll you went off w the title alone!
I just love when you drop new videos
HEEAAARDDDD YOUUUU THANK YOU SO MUCH u are a blessing from God especially when I find myself still hurt after leaving men who couldn’t get with the program but u remind me that what’s really on the other end is what I deserve and the pain is way less than what it would be if I threw my heart in a draining situation, thanks I don’t know whether to call you sis or mom lol Thankyou for the inspiration and validation always ❤️❤️❤️
Summer moved on way to fast and got pregnant even faster, she should of just continued dating Larry without getting pregnant and they weren't even dating that long, yeah she been knew him but at one point did she ever date him? bravo summer. And Larry also seemed a little too immature for me. Seems like he don't even care summer doesn't want to be with him anymore.
"Wounded💫Souls"
I get so excited when you post😅 dropped everything I was just doing
I just curbed two this month and three this year. I will not waiver my standards...
You ladies have great wisdom over here. Keep shining 💕.
I went through soo much just like many others in life, but I refuse to let my experiences to harden me! I’ve lived and learned from the good and bad. This Queen right here will try my very best to not go down on my standards again. My male friend told me not to have my standards so high but saw what I went through with a narcissist before. So he’s trippin and I’ll continue to raise the bar cause I’m a great woman. To anyone reading this keep growing and healing we got this!*💕💫💕
Wildheart Waves🖤✊🏿🔥
I appreciate that this channel is here to educate women on relationships and what we may be doing wrong instead of solely bashing women like the other content on TH-cam. Atleast this content seems like the intention is to help/educate.
Whew Chile !!! Thank ya!! This is how I feel about women that deal w/ men like Future .. he's one of my favorite musical artists btw .. but these women literally set themselves up and get mad at the outcome. I don't get that!
Summer Walker talks a good game but she ain't no different ! You sing about all this stuff in your music.. but here we are.
Before you said go back and watch them other 2 videos I was already thinking about doing it
People get in relationships for what you have or the quality you present yourself
Wildheart❤️, Lady you've been such a blessing to me. I've made 5 different TH-cam channels lol due to me changing my phone losing password etc and nmw I end up on yo channel been 2 years now. It's always on time! I can tell you are about principle cause the way u word things💯💯. I love & support you all the way Queen! One sister to another❤️🌹.
The video I never knew I needed, thank you
Listening to your videos always makes me feel better. Especially when it comes to dating and vetting however I don’t date men but the advice is the same for all relationships I just went through a situation where I was getting to know someone who had lots of red flags I knew it wouldn’t work out and there was a clash. Having standards or high standards is a form of protection for those who didn’t make the cut or just wasn’t qualified.
Have a program... It will be trial and error and the more you are able to decline with what is not in alignment with your your standards, the better you will become at representing your standards after that it becomes 2nd nature to be the high quality feminine woman.💕
Love your boundaries videos ❤️
I'm so happy I found your channel! It really resonates with me
Another banger!!!
I can't wait until you do another video! They are such a blessings! I am about to take accountability and improve myself and up my bar of standards without guilt! thanks for your videos
💯💯💯💯💯 accountability I took accountability and I started to see things differently
Where were u 5 years ago!!! Lol I needed all this information!!!! But god I’m happy your doing this now
Right on time sis💕God knew I needed you!
Omgg I was literally just thinking about how I couldn't wait to hear your thoughts on this. Well articulated and presented as always. Love you💕
Imagine if you wrote a book😍🙌🏾
I know right ‼️
You are the truth!!
Thank you for your guidance & commentary. You have a beautiful voice thats appropriate for the work u do. U are an asset to black women. Much love respect n admiration from Memphis tn 🤎
Girl, you just fed my whole being!!! Yes! I love this.
This is for the algorithm.
I just click like even before I watch because I know Gems 💎 will be dropped! Thank you sis!
Excellent conversation 👌
As a man this has me thinking about “A Miami Tale” with Trina 😂
I'm not a millionaire so I don't desire a man thats a millionaire. I don't have children so I can say I'd prefer a man with no children or at least 1. Because I can. And many men don't like that. They been hurt and want all women to be hurt lol. It's pretty sad. I'd take the garbage man. He got benefits so you know he gon to the dentist, etc. 🤷♀️
First off I love your intro & I love what you’re doing for women especially young girls ! On point ❤
I’m with u when u right and you are most definitely right
Where you been @wildheart😢 I missed your knowledge 🙏. You came back dropping gems once again 🥇 💎. Thank You
Just love your channel and commentary
Thank you! ☺️😉
Oh cause i been waiting foe you at the doe! Helloo my good sis
I wish you posted more often, i be so pressed to listen to your advice lol still love you though
@Wildheart Waves thank you sis❤Absolutely!!! Accountability is key for me…
It really does change your mindset in a flash.
Keep your standards high always in all areas of your life.
Have a wonderful day Queen’s, sending you love and light from the uk🇬🇧
Sidebar;
People in your life may tell you (well meaning) to lower your standards a little, ladies please don’t. Your standards are yours and their standards are theirs.💚💚💚
Exactly! It all starts with our self respect,and not changing what makes us feel comfortable just to suit others needs! And also learning to stop trying to people please and then blame the man!! This generation is just failing! Men get upset even when they can't have sex with yo,it doesn't even matter if you set standards these lower vibing guys feels entitle to have sex!!! 4:09 it's so true because I don't sleep around,these guys cal! It me being on a high horse,not realising how much hoes they get with!!! Those type of guts will try damage you!!!5:33 it's over bearing they make it seems as if us having self respect! Basically they think women that's hard to get is rebellious!! And they do seek to try and destroy us!!And just because they can't have us
No real man wants a gold digging woman who only cares about money. You expect men to do for you, but you don't have to do anything. High value men don't go for taking women.
2:44 omg it’s ENNY!❤
The program is call passport bros 😂
Summer likewise the rest of the women objectified themsleves as object that are good for sex and intimacy and nothing else beside that. Because what else are those men she got impregnated from were there for? They have shown her early in the relationship they weren't looking for anything serious with her.
The problem with this thesis is that it doesn’t take into account that a major part of this “standard” is getting a man that can provide to a certain degree which is nine times out of ten a higher level than the woman brings to the table. That being the case, that woman has to believe in his plan and vision for the future. That being the case, she is getting on HIS PROGRAM. She has to trust in his ability to deliver now and in the future. Sure that man is going to want a woman with standards, but part of that is a willingness to follow him. That being the case, he’s the prize. That being the case, her standards are secondary to his mission and plan for the future. Am I wrong?
Can’t just accept any kind of treatment from these dusty ahh dudes!
Woman has standards where. Your situation determines if your standards is real or fake.
May💛 God 💜Be 💚With 💖You Always ❤️Much 💙Love💖 Blessings 💚Always ☺️ ✌️ 💯 ❤️ 🎇 🌈 ☺️ 🌐💚💙💜💛💛💛💛💛💛💜💜💙
Yap coz a person who stands for nothing, falls for everything
Peace 💖and 💜Blessings💛 Too💙 My 💜Brother 💛May❤️ God 💙Bless💜 You💛 Always ❤️May💙 God 💚Bless 💛You ❤️Richly❤️ with Everything💚 You💛 need💙 Always Much💜 Love 💛Blessings ❤️Always ☺️ ✌️ 💯 ❤️ 🎇 🌈 ☺️ 🌐❤️💛💜💜💖💜💜💜💛💛💛💛
I don't have sympathy for her she complained about her first baby daddy was this s*** and then she got pregnant right after she left him not even two years after leaving him for what just to have another baby daddy ? These women never learn from they first mistakes 😂😂 like girl why wasn't you on birth control
Can we get more videos
So if women set the standard and men follow that would me women are the leader and men are the followers..but how can women be leaders in a patchiatry
Women setting standards for what they will & will not accept from men is not the same as them “leading” men. A woman’s standard does not deprive a man of any of his roles as the leader.
@@WildheartWaves well why men dont have standards for what kind of person they want to be as a man, if so it wouldn't matter what women do..if men can't decide on their own standards as a person and someone have to set standards for them than men are followers by definition
@@kurokaizen1889 I never said women shouldn't have standards so I do agree but if men behavior is based on the behaviors of someone else by definition men are followers..me personally idc about being a suitable candidate, for a man or a marriage..but at some point men will have to gain some standards for themselves if he want to be a man or a suitable mate for a woman
If your standards don't match your situation it's a waste of time period. It won't work. Look at the woman who have multiple baby daddies trying to have high standards after the fact. No luck still.
Reality check.
First 🎉💕
I’ll make it really really easy for you. Take a look at the teenage boys that you know. Your friends kids, your cousins, etc. and ask yourself, would I marry the adult version of that male child? If your answer is no, take a look at the parent(s) and think about the caliber of people in your family and who you surround yourself with. Your sisters are not raising marriageable men because they aren’t being discerning with the men they give their wombs to. Now you want those men to raise themselves up with they were never shown how? It starts in the home. Support women that make good decisions regarding their womb.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
A word
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Ladies you have to qualify for the man you are looking for!you can say anything you want,but at the end of the day ,he decides if you are worth it or not…..
No, we decide if HE’S Worth it or not! We are the prize.
It goes both ways. A man is never just the prize in the equation. I’ll never put men on a pedestal no what what they have.
@@Kariberri208 no you’re not,you decide who you screw!men decide who they invest in and marry! Especially if he has resources and money!check this out,if this was true more women would have the men that they want….and they DON’T,period!Kevin Samuels would not have had all those women calling in show’s looking for men that they didn’t qualify for…….that’s why most BW are single or baby mamas!cause of that attitude you have!done….
@@nstar1372 I know several women that do!they have everything that they want…..
@@Kariberri208 Sure you are 😂😂😂
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was the "gray areas" comment really necessary? 🤨