Stop entertaining a man after he has showed you who he is and it isn’t marriage minded and he doesn’t truly serve the Lord. You are just waisting your precious time.
I feel like my mom raised me to get a man.. I remember my dad cheating on her going out of town and one night she left home to go catch him cheating.. One time she told me all men cheat.. But she would give my dad sex every time he came home he even gave her an STD.. She still fooled with him. But I have learned to become a woman on my own lately .. By watching tony I've learned it is okay to be alone and love myself before looking for love in all the wrong places.. I had to learn the hard way with my child's father and ever since I left him I have found this new me and she loves herself unconditionally and she loves God even more..
That's a blessing. Thanks for sharing your testimony. Unfortunately there is a generational curse over most families/women. They are taught to look for love outwardly, and at times they are taught to do any and everything to get and keep a man so to speak. It is a blessing that you are choosing to fight. So that you can end this generational curse in Jesus name.
Let the Lord use you. He may enable you to write a book, or be a motivational speaker one day in Jesus name. The sky is the limit. Ask Him to direct your path. There is purpose in the pain.
I was married for 11 months and my husband was deathly sick for all of those 11 months. we couldn't have date nights, or be intimate with each other ( in that way). All we could do was lay in the bed and talk to each other, and it didn't matter. It didn't stop our love of each other. It didn't stop me from working 40 hours a week to make sure he had health insurance, and spending the weekends sleeping in the chair next to his hospital bed. The lack of sex didn't stop me from holding his hand and praying for him as he took his last breath.
That is different. That is apart of honoring your vows as a wife. Sickness and in health. Till death do us part. God will give us the strength we need to endure anything in Jesus name. Blessings to you.
do you mean that he should only be used for labor and he's disposable sorry if i don't understand and if it seems that I'm putting words in your mouth but if you actually mean that they're disposable accessories then thats pretty sexist
It’s so funny all the grown boys have asked me in the beginning “can you cook?” It’s become a weeding out process for me. They are trying to see how I can serve them before they even prove themselves worthy of me.
Sounds like a great time to ask, 'Who do they serve, since they like to be served and made to feel like a King" 😎 If a man does not have a submissive spirit, he cannot expect you to have one. 🙏
I am sick of that too! Was asked that by a " minister" who had no job, no car, no drivers license, and living in house rent free owned by his aunt. He cooks and watches tv. I started a business and have goals. I cannot sit around and eat all day!! # grown boy preacher
He's not lying! I was doing all that for my ex-husband cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, working a full time job like he do and going to school. The more I did the more he complained and the less he did. I found myself crying in my bathroom. He just looked at me and said he doesn't know what to do about me crying. I talked to him calmy about what I needed for him. He would change for about two weeks, then back to himself. We went marriage counseling three times. I had enough and filed for divorce and got my peace.
Wow you were doing way to much and being to giving. Sad to say, men take advantage of that. Even in marriage, they get comfortable and you have to keep them on their toes. It sounds like you were a mule. I hate to see black women working and doing everything for the household and the man is not contributing. He is a burden get rid of his behind and do not look back. When he see that you do not give a damb then he will straighten up but just having those talks and forcing convo NEVER work on men especially black men. Many of them only look out for self.
He was a narcissist. I know a lot of people say that is an overly used. But that is the truth. You did yourself a favor. Try to go little to no contact with him. Even if you all have children that are coming up. For your sanity and peace. Stay little to no contact with him. With his mentality. He will be more damaging to keep him in your children's lives on a regular.
It’s amazing to see so many highlights in this that you’ve been doing it all on your own for the most part, but there he was just taking taking taking without seeing that he’s supposed to be giving back without a thought.
This was my marriage at 24. And he didn’t even want counseling. I’m glad I experienced that young enough to be able to know what I will no longer accept. He took as us being married as entrapment.
A lotta women be afraid to upset the man for fear of losing him to some other woman who don’t require much. When instead they need to speak up so he can step his game up.
Exactly!!! My man has been complaining that I don’t show him affection that’s why he is distant now, and I said well I don’t show you affection (kissing,sex) because your distant. So we just going round in circles 🤦🏻♀️
small11989 and for what it’s worth, if things don’t change and he does not attempt to wAnna take the time to make love to your mind, to take time out for you and not only show affection only when he wants sex, leave! I did this. I just recently got out of a relationship for this being one of the reasons. He’s a grown boy.
I absolutely was raised to be a housewife...learned to cook when i was 11...was told that a man likes his dinner on the table when he gets home..I know how to sew, cook, clean , do gardening, mow the lawn, do the food shopping , do the budgeting for the home , laundry, and do you know what I got for all of this??? A NARC who appreciated NOTHING!!
@@nikkyshamz2696 Sorry for going off...I still got some anger issues from being married to a narc for over 30 yrs...divorced now, learning from Tony & RC how to appreciate my worth
vegi girl no you have every right to go off that man wasted 30 years of your life, I’m 20 but I wasted 3 years on fuckboy then after him months later I dated a dude who wasted almost 6 months of my time( see what I said? I wasted 3 years and then the dude wasted 5/6 months of my time) and honestly I’m still mad about both but mainly the guy I dated 5/6 months because I knew him before I even dated him ( guess I didn’t know him enough) it’s a healing process I’m still going through after 2 years
@@shutit4024 Thank you for your insight. Its very difficult for woman who dont know what its like to be with a narc...its pure hell..i can always tell when another woman has been through it...im dealing with night terrors right now cause my ex used to stand over me at night sometimes and start threatening me. Like you, I met another man who seemed to be good, knew him a long time, went out briefly and thought we would get together after my divorce...wow, was i blindsided! You're right, the second one hurt alot more than my ex..i expected alot more from the friend and he totally blew my world apart. Im focusing more on myself these days and trying to forgive myself for making so many bad choices. Thanks for your support
Shoot, use those skills to make money. Then you can go on some bombbbbbbb vacations around the world multiple times a year. Boom. Then you’ll make cool new friends and business connections and buy a house in Barbados and kick it. Might even become a wife along the way, maybe not but you’ll be having the whole time of your LIFE!!!
Sad thing is most women got this handed down from moms, grandmas and aunties. This is what I was told and more. We need several hours of Tony's vids to attempt to reprogram. Thanks so much for freeing the captives Tony 💕
Tony you are so funny! 😂 he said “don’t come talking to me about chicken nuggets being unhealthy when you got a whole baby arm in you unprotected” 💀💀💀🤣🤣🤣 so true tho!
Another awesome video. Tony, you speaking the truth. All facts! 1.Speak and be direct to your partner 2. You are not a robot 3. You not a slave to anyone 4. Know your worth and love yourself
Funny! I was born in an Eastern European country and I was always told that a woman has to know how to cook. Pfft, please, that’s not going to get me a man or keep him. Now, living in Canada, I’ve had a Spanish guy take me out to restaurants, a Jamaican guy cook curry goat, Chinese guy cook rice & vegetables, Italian guy cook pasta con broccoli and a Dutch guy cook split pea soup with ham... My point? Men don’t need a woman to cook for them, it means nothing.
@@va8196 True, I saw my mother slave away cooking, cleaning, working... I never did like cooking, I like cleaning (clean freak) and have worked since a teenager though (whether I needed to or not), because it gives me a purpose!
This video made me see why the women in my family say they're proud of me. Smh, my ex & ex-fiance knew, if they even breathed on me the wrong way I was leaving them. Hearing this breaks my heart for women who go through this. Until this video, I haven't seen, heard or experienced what Mr. Gaskins just said. Ladies, please value yourselves more than this. And same with men. Do not fall victim to a cycle of toxicity and dysfunction. May everyone stay blessed now ♥︎
Tony...alot of women will not admit that they do not want to be alone...they don't want their friends and family jabbing them about it...so they put up with the stuff . I have learned that I am more valuable than being dogged out..no matter how long I have to be single!
My mother never told me I have to learn to cook for a man. I learn to cook for myself because mom got home at 5. I got home from school at 3. I was not waiting for her to get home to cook for me so I cooked for myself.
Raised by a single parent also... a strong woman she stressed, "Im not gonna be around forever you gotta learn how to do this for yourself and your little sister". Never about a man, about survival.
Basic necessities such as cleaning ,laundry and cooking & money should be treat equally both genders. Unfortunately many parents tend to teach that to one gender ,the girl . So no wonder black women are more advanced in education etc
Thank you Tony!!!! We need to hear this as women!!! I did this.... I tried to be everything... I cooked, cleaned, worked 40 hours a week, gave all my money to our joint account...had and took care of his baby... I didn’t season the food enough for him... I’m a RN... I’m was trying to keep him around to love and he put me down for not enough season on the food🤦🏽♀️... I was a damn fool🤦🏽♀️😳!!! I accepted it... I was miserable... depressed... in constant physical and emotional pain... I left a year ago...I’m done giving a grown boy husband privileges... I’ve been single for a year since the break up... my infant son is fatherless now... it’s hard... some days I’m lonely and miss companionship ... but God has given me so much peace, freedom, joy, and love..... God has replaced everything I thought I lost in the relationship... I thought I met my husband... Thank God it wasn’t him!!! God has my husband waiting for me... Thank God I’m growing and learning more about myself daily!!! I have a life coach and therapist...Thank you Tony for helping me prepare for my 👑 🙌🏽😘 Ladies learn from your pain... grow through it... I promise it will be worth it in the end❤️
Wow! You are so right! You described my marriage that I was in for 16 years.I WAS NOTHING BUT A SLAVE TO AN ABUSIVE MAN. Thank you for being a champion for women!
Two aunts of mine have told me I won't get a man because I can't cook or clean well enough. My problem is to do with my disabilities. Thank you very much for telling me there are men out there that will want me for who I REALLY am!
I'm not a moderator but I definitely had someone's entire page shut down bc they said something negative about Mrs. S. Gaskins on mother's day!!! Act accordingly!!!
Tony you are preaching the 💯% truth!!!! At this point in my life I am comfortable enough in my own skin to where I am not compromising who I am to have a man. When I need to discuss something with my partner or need to even check him about something, I don’t bite my tongue. I’m respectful but I absolutely refuse to walk on eggshells. I did that in my past marriages and I refuse to do that in my 40’s!
Exactly! I express my self and most men feel like that’s aggressive. I was like how? I didn’t raise my voice, curse or yell. I said I’m not cooking to get your approval.
The knowledge I’ve been getting from you has changed my life and mindset on relationships. I’m single and loving it being happy with me instead of with some cheating , lying and being disrespectful and deceitful etc. Peace be still that’s what I have in my life right now
@mama Martin when u start focusing on your 3 B’s it won’t even bother u . Then u will say what was I thinking just keep yourself busy and treat yourself I go out to movies , dinners and plays by myself and love it or take my kids with me some times . Trust me it will get easier ur going to hurt yessssssss but that too shall pass . Be Blessed n safe
Show a man how much you love God by doing what God’s Word says, instead of trying to please him! Show him how much you love God❤️ , so he knows how much you love him! I don’t know about the rest of these ladies, but I’m in waiting for a man of God! If he is looking for a Godly woman he wants to know how well her prayer life is, how obedient she is to Christ, how much work is she doing for the Lord: cooking, cleaning are other aspects that are important, but “relationship” with the Creator is the most important! So many Christian women fail trying to please the creation over the CREATOR!
Speak on it lady, they are not ready for this conversation cos they want to live how they want to live. God can't be mocked, we reap the consequences of disobedience.
Best comment I’ve seen about this topic. There is no way around it. In order for a woman to truly know her worth, she has to know and love God First. 🙏🏽💕
Recently a friend disclosed she asked her unsaved husband his definition of a good wife. I was in shock! Tony, you described him to a tee! She quit her job to take care of him and their 4 toddler aged grandchildren. From my observation, her husband and the grandchildren’s parents act as if she is supposed to do this. I will share this video with her. Keep her in prayer. I see the toll it’s taking on her mentally and physically. Thank you Tony once again for imparting relationship gems! God bless you and the family.
It's nice to see a man in tune with a womans body and what happens to us. When a man understands that he will understand us. And I affirm that I will marry a man who doesn't expect me to be stressed out dealing with everyday chores. This is how most women live these days. Why are we expected to spread ourselves so thin that we're feel like we're gonna have a mental breakdown? To tell you the truth this is exactly how I thought until I started watching your videos.
I have never heard ANYONE be so honest about this before (man or woman) and I must say, it’s quite refreshing to hear the real deal coming from a man...The master and slave metaphor is priceless! Thank you and God Bless! 🙏🏽❤️
I did the traditional cooking for 8 every night & my husband thanked me. I taught my son to cook the basics & he cook as needed for his family. My husband retired after serving the city for 27 years AND told me I do not have to cook meals anymore. Only when I feel like cooking & that is LOVE on a platter.
During quarantine I have been teaching myself to cook because my family would make fun of me. I have had my fourteen year old little sister help me. Last week I sent some pound cake and some fudge Blondie's to my older sister and her family. An hour after leaving there my older sister texted me and said her fiance said that I can get a man cooking like that. It made me laugh. Then I was like I'm not going to hold on to that because it was just a compliment. I had to remind myself that I was cooking for myself. I didn't tell my little sister what he said because I know that she pays attention to everything I say. Instead I told her again that I want her to be able to take care of herself. I think watching you has changed the way I think. Last year I probably would have been on clouds for weeks after that compliment. I have to stay focused.
Absolutely right! Always remain humble about compliments because you never know if they are sincere. I dated a couple of guys that *thought* they could sing, and well... I was just thinking what desperate woman told you this?? But I've been guilty of giving pity compliments too lol😁
Stay focused sister! Our little sisters and brothers and nephews and neices DO hold on to every word and ACTION we say and do. They are so impressionable. As the 'single aunty' to my nephew I make more an effort to pay attention to my behavior to set a good example, my nephew, 15, looks up to everything that I do. Now that I'm in this path and watching TG the single aunty status has a whole new meaning. You are an amazing big sister and I'm glad you didn't share that problematic comment. Be blessed.
This video the truth. I was so confused in my last relationship, thinking if i be as perfect as possible, he would love me & do right by me. That relationship became the worst I've ever encountered. I was never enough, and it messed me up.
Brotha! I Thank God everyday for you. I pray God continue to BLESS you. You help me be transformed by the renewal of my mind. Your videos give me hope, wisdom, and encouragement. Thank You so much.
Thank you Nelson for representing. So few Men are not putting the work in growing and evolving and missing out on the most beautiful gifts that true love in a healthy reciprocal relationship can provide them till death ... I wish you the best on your journey and transformation may you will be blessed with right partner for you and a life of true happiness and prosperity. 🙌🏻
Marriage should not be based on just sex or the slave mentality. It should be based on love, truth, faithfulness, commitment, understanding, compassion, respect, morals, values, honesty.
"If I fold it, it's gone look like I balled it up" ( folding clothes reference ) 😆😆🤣 Everything was spot on TG, I have been teaching my clients these same principles. Not only have I taught them this, but with 8yrs of faithful successful marriage I teach from the example of respecting and loving my wife I live. Women must learn that they bring value to the table because God gave them that influence.
Man, I had a good male friend (no sex!) That I used to cook for when he'd come to spend time with me. And whats funny is.. he hit me with, "yeah, its good to have you as a SIS" I had expressed my interest in him. And he still hit me with this energy. Ladies.. Tony tells us all the time! WE MUST NOT GIVE WIFE BENEFITS TO MEN AND GROWN BOYS WHO DONT DESERVE IT! WE ARE MORE THAN A CHEF AND MAID!!
@@BK-tp6jf Wow, haven't seen this comment in a while! But yes. In context, we had known each other for many years prior. He just wasn't Interested, period. Which was fine!
Serving don’t keep nooo grown boy I am witness of that!! Cook lunch n bring to work everyday for him, make salads Bc he wants it..... if he wants food I order food..... n he still went ghost and didn’t care about how I felt!!!! A grown boy is a grown boy no matter what!!!
Yep. Was bringing lunch to him literally almost everyday and would think twice to ask him to bring me anything. Always expecting me to give give give and wasn’t giving me anything at ALL. I JUST COLD TURKEY STOPPED
Great message. I’m a teenager and especially at my age I feel the pressure to be learning how to cook and clean right now for a man. Thank you for reminding that self worth isn’t based on being in a kitchen or sweeping floors
“Ladies we are not a piece of property, we’ll have to woman up,, we have to respect ourselves, we have to love ourselves”.-TG)Thanks for all you do. A most needed word to hear, Blessings and Favor on you and your family! 🙏
"You've got to "Woman Up" 🙌🏾I Love this message! It's something I've struggled with in my past relationships when I was younger. Being assertive and speaking my truth was Not one of my strong points. With experience I had to Woman Up real quick!
That's what I'm talking about make love to her mind...Yessss most men these days don't know how to do that....or even know how to hold a descent conversation.
Eric Brownlee find out her love language and love her the way she needs to be loved or feels loved, that will be making love to her mind. Also ease her burdens.
I bought the book “A Women’s Influence” and this book is absolutely fantastic. A must read to learn so much. Thank you Tony and Sheri Gaskins you have changed my life. 🙏🏼
Stayed in my marriage thinking he was going to change but he didn't. But I freed myself from the toxic situation still learning and growing thanks for these videos
Tony. I really appreciate this video it has opened my eyes...I’m 24 and I feel so relieved and have the tools to make the right choices. I am accepting my feminine side and it’s very powerful, instead of being angry And aggressive it’s best to just be calm and say your side. Cooking and cleaning I’m good at, but it’s not everything and I’m worth so much more, we both have responsibilities! Thank you so much. You are helping us younger people wake up and stop the nonsense and what the media has made normal.
This was well needed I notice women have lowered standards to be with men.. I had a man to actual tell me roles have changed .. meaning women are asking men out commitments etc., I refuse, Luke you said in the beginning what your wife said. Basically she was ok being by herself 💯❤️
@Tony Gaskins Tony, it is so heartening to listen to you speaking so profoundly about women, especially in this day and age when it's widely acceptable for women to be sexualized, objectified, scrutinized and silenced for being vocal when speaking up. I want to give you the biggest agape hug today. You are responsible for building up so many women's lives through this channel and my heartfelt gratitude to you and your family. I'm thankful to God for your wisdom and your genuine heart because you are choosing to build women instead of tearing women down. As a conscious woman, I encourage every woman to heed what Tony is saying. Ladies, you are created to be loved, not to be enslaved by a man in the name of false love.
I feel like an extension of him. I feel like a shell of the person that I used to be. He had mentally beat me down so bad that I left him. He immediately went to therapy. Upon returning home from 1800 miles away, after a week or 2, i realized that he did not change at all. Im so disgusted with him. Im also disabled so it makes it extra hard for me to leave with my possessions. Wish i could find a group or company that helps abused women to escape from their abuser
Kim Smith Where do you live? Google Shelters in your area hun.. sorry to hear that but I am sure there is help out there for you, maybe ask your worker.
@@IamKarryanne im looking online on another device right now. He moved us to Florida but i am from Michigan and that's where my family and support are at.
I grew up knowing how to cook. My Mom is single Mom and said a man is a bonus. Not an necessity. She said to me you never know what tomorrow is going to bring you have to be able to support yourself and your family and vice versa.
Im going to take this advice; im in a predicament where I have no choice but to be a single.m. Everyone is acting like I'm a bad person for not keeping my family together [even though I have valid reasons to leave]. The greatest feeling in the world is realizing no one is coming to save you. It feels like a burden that has been lifted off my shoulders.
I don’t know if your able to read this, but tony I want to say thank you. Your videos has helped me to learn what it means to value and to love myself. I got your book on amazon and I’m reading it right now and highlighting important parts that stick out to me. I recently went through a break up for the millionth time with the same man of three years. And the chapter of knowing your worth is like you were talking to me. It hit home for me I wanted to cry. He didn’t respect me because I didn’t know my worth. I want to thank your absolutely beautiful wife for her parts of the book as well. She is such a strong woman with morals and values I wish every young woman will have someday. Wish she could be my big sis ☺️ I’m on page 29 and it has blessed me so much already. God bless you tony and your beautiful family, and may God continue to use you for His kingdoms sake. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I respect you all around the board. I love getting advice from men about men. I could never get advice from other men it would be like pulling a tooth. I've been thru so much with a man with him being emotionally abusive, verbally abusive and mentally abusive. So i thank you im emotional over here because of some of us is so lost.
Finally someone who is saying what i known since a child. My own father said to me " no man is ever going to want you". This is cause i used my mind and told him he was no man by the way he treated my mom. Woman need to stop buying their little girls baby dolls, little kitchens, easy bake ovens. The world teaches little girls its a mans world when its not. Start talking to your daughter that they will always have you so if she needs to come home she can. Teach her to earn her self in this world and if a man wants a piece of it he got to earn her. Teach her that her body is the most precious clean beautiful temple that God gave her to be held for her husband. A boyfriend is not a commitment to anything!! Boyfriend is a mans trick to a woman by taking a space away from two words. Show them : boyfriend - boy friend!!! How does a missing space allow him to have your body now husband is a whole different word. All these weak men have called me prude, stuck up and told more than once that i value my kitty to high. What?? You dont even know my last name?? Ive never have felt so proud!!! I decided to think like i was that young girl again who defended my mom. Now im defending myself!!
I am not on face book, I am old school. I enjoy listening to your messages. I'm engaged, so communication is key. Glad you are real and not sitting on your gift. Be encouraged to keep sharing. I listen every day!
Lol my ears perked up when you said that 9 out of 10 women teach they daughters to cook to get a man 😂 Tony...maybe this last generation but my generation (the millenial generation. I was born in 88) we teaching our all our children SELF SUFFICIENCY, boys and girls. Lol most of us aren't thinking about a man when we teaching our daughters and we damn sure aren't pushing gender roles. I teach my daughter FEMININITY and that has nothing to do with a man, that's about who she is. She's 7 and loves cooking (with me) and gardening. My 11 year old son is actually the cook of the family. He shops and cooks full meals believe it or not haha they daddy on the other hand...we only safe with BBQ 🤣
Yes definitely focused on femininity with my daughter, like don't wear open toe sandals and not have your toe polish ratchet! (OMG), along with teaching her how to cook which did not happen until her early twenties, and my son's cook BETTER than my daughter.. lol
@@Newladyn09 Not gone lie, I tried to go to the Home Depot YESTERDAY with sandals and some busted ass toes (just a quick run to grab some bug spray)💀💀 my daughter noticed right away! Lmao she was like "Uhhh, just take that polish off mom" 😂😂😂 but its gel from before the lockdown 🤷🏾♀️ then she goes on and on about how she never seen my toes and nails like this lmfao so I took that moment to teach her not to judge others 💀...but I did put on some sneakers tho 😭😭😭
@@8806Erika 😂😂😂, You didn't flip it on her with reversed psychology (ROTF) The teacher got taught and reminded not to go out the house looking like you haven't had home training.. !!😂😂💅💄👡
I'm okay being single after I gave my all to 2 failed marriages. Only to be left and cheated on with another woman. I was the traditional wife cooked, cleaned, blah blah blah. None of that keeps a man who don't want to be kept. It's always a women in the bushes waiting patiently for the chance to be next.🤷🏽♀️
Maaaann!! I loooove these videos. Tony need to be in somebody comedy show. His messages hit just right because of his intellect, knowledge, and HUMOR!!! I’m soaking up all this knowledge. It’s helped me tremendously. Lord bless Tony and family.
Tony is preaching the truth! I’m so tired of these thirsty men wanting to take advantage of us queens. A lot of men take advantage of everything a good woman brings to the table. They are definitely grown boys and need to learn how to treat a real one. For real! Thank you Tony for this message. Be blessed 🙏🏽
So true! Loyalty and honesty. Yes, you gotta have someone who will love you unconditionally(loyalty) and be able to trust that person with your whole heartand life(honesty). May I add communication because if there's no healthy communication than that person has emotional issues that need to be addressed.
Hey Tony a few months ago I was going through a lot I was so depressed until I came upon ur videos and began to pray more and harder I am now finding my peace. I was engaged about to be married until he broke down and walk out saying he needs his space...I was so in love with this man know its my first time I ever loved a man like this...I always have my guards up but for some reason I let it down for him...after he left I felt like I was nobody I cant do with out him...and let me tell u the man up about hold my hand and took me through the fire....instead of asking him to take me out, i asked him to walk with me through it..but eventually I broke it off eventhough I broke it off I was still around just thinking the maybe but now I put my trust in God and honestly I do not want a man in my life when is the right time God will place him in my life...I just want to say to many ladies out there the war is not with flesh and blood but of the spiritual realm pick up ur harmor and go to war...do not let the devil break you have a bless day.
This was real talk from the beginning to the end. I always wondered was a man capable of understanding any of this. It's sobering to see a man say this so we can clearly see that it is selfishness and immaturity that causes a man to treat a woman like a servant. Let's wise up and rise up women! We deserve better but won't get it if we settle for less...
21 years old I grew up south out fatherly advice I’ve been listening and applying to my life and I see all the results . Making a man respect me is a thing I’m proud of
YOU AINT NEVER LIED! I stop cooking after my kids were grown. I Dont cook or make groceries....I did because I had to for my family! Now IM COOKING FREE🤣🤣
Stop entertaining a man after he has showed you who he is and it isn’t marriage minded and he doesn’t truly serve the Lord. You are just waisting your precious time.
Amen...
When its toooooooo many red flags I'm OUT.
Wasting time is right.
You are 100%right.
This! Is! The! One!
I feel like my mom raised me to get a man.. I remember my dad cheating on her going out of town and one night she left home to go catch him cheating.. One time she told me all men cheat.. But she would give my dad sex every time he came home he even gave her an STD.. She still fooled with him. But I have learned to become a woman on my own lately .. By watching tony I've learned it is okay to be alone and love myself before looking for love in all the wrong places.. I had to learn the hard way with my child's father and ever since I left him I have found this new me and she loves herself unconditionally and she loves God even more..
💕💕💕
Woww thanks for sharing. I really needed to hear this
That's a blessing. Thanks for sharing your testimony. Unfortunately there is a generational curse over most families/women. They are taught to look for love outwardly, and at times they are taught to do any and everything to get and keep a man so to speak. It is a blessing that you are choosing to fight. So that you can end this generational curse in Jesus name.
Let the Lord use you. He may enable you to write a book, or be a motivational speaker one day in Jesus name. The sky is the limit. Ask Him to direct your path. There is purpose in the pain.
Thanks for sharing you testimony! Blessings dear
I was married for 11 months and my husband was deathly sick for all of those 11 months. we couldn't have date nights, or be intimate with each other ( in that way). All we could do was lay in the bed and talk to each other, and it didn't matter. It didn't stop our love of each other. It didn't stop me from working 40 hours a week to make sure he had health insurance, and spending the weekends sleeping in the chair next to his hospital bed. The lack of sex didn't stop me from holding his hand and praying for him as he took his last breath.
That's Beautiful 💗💙. Sending my Deepest Condolences to You and Ur Family
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾✝️🕊
So sweet loving and loyal
God bless you 🙏 ❤ 🙌
Sorry for your loss...that's true love
That is different. That is apart of honoring your vows as a wife. Sickness and in health. Till death do us part. God will give us the strength we need to endure anything in Jesus name. Blessings to you.
God bless u sis! That's a beautiful example of real love
“A man is an accessory not a necessity “-Sherri Gaskin. “Let a mans character be his currency”- tony gaskin . (Hope I quoted the words right) 🤗
Sounds perfect to me
Yes👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I saved this message as my daily reminder 🙌🏽
That's the quote right there.
do you mean that he should only be used for labor and he's disposable sorry if i don't understand and if it seems that I'm putting words in your mouth but if you actually mean that they're disposable accessories then thats pretty sexist
It’s so funny all the grown boys have asked me in the beginning “can you cook?” It’s become a weeding out process for me. They are trying to see how I can serve them before they even prove themselves worthy of me.
Sounds like a great time to ask, 'Who do they serve, since they like to be served and made to feel like a King" 😎 If a man does not have a submissive spirit, he cannot expect you to have one. 🙏
Okay
I cannot stand self-serving people like that in general! They're usually manipulative too.
I am sick of that too! Was asked that by a " minister" who had no job, no car, no drivers license, and living in house rent free owned by his aunt. He cooks and watches tv. I started a business and have goals. I cannot sit around and eat all day!! # grown boy preacher
"They are trying to see how I can serve them before they even prove themselves worthy of me." THIS!!!
He's not lying! I was doing all that for my ex-husband cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, working a full time job like he do and going to school. The more I did the more he complained and the less he did. I found myself crying in my bathroom. He just looked at me and said he doesn't know what to do about me crying. I talked to him calmy about what I needed for him. He would change for about two weeks, then back to himself. We went marriage counseling three times. I had enough and filed for divorce and got my peace.
Wow you were doing way to much and being to giving. Sad to say, men take advantage of that. Even in marriage, they get comfortable and you have to keep them on their toes. It sounds like you were a mule. I hate to see black women working and doing everything for the household and the man is not contributing. He is a burden get rid of his behind and do not look back. When he see that you do not give a damb then he will straighten up but just having those talks and forcing convo NEVER work on men especially black men. Many of them only look out for self.
He was a narcissist. I know a lot of people say that is an overly used. But that is the truth. You did yourself a favor. Try to go little to no contact with him. Even if you all have children that are coming up. For your sanity and peace. Stay little to no contact with him. With his mentality. He will be more damaging to keep him in your children's lives on a regular.
@@Nekole1 You're right! Men will take advantage and get comfortable IF we don't set the ground rules and ask for help EARLY
It’s amazing to see so many highlights in this that you’ve been doing it all on your own for the most part, but there he was just taking taking taking without seeing that he’s supposed to be giving back without a thought.
This was my marriage at 24. And he didn’t even want counseling. I’m glad I experienced that young enough to be able to know what I will no longer accept. He took as us being married as entrapment.
"A lot of the men ya'll serving is SORRY"........Say it Loud Mr. Gaskins!!!
Very sub par to say the least.
Exactly!👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Yep
I hollered‼️💯💯💯
Tell the truth!!
A lotta women be afraid to upset the man for fear of losing him to some other woman who don’t require much. When instead they need to speak up so he can step his game up.
Inga Reacts so true.
Yesssss 🙌🏾💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾
Oooh Lord Inga Reacts I almost started shouting and running 🏃♀️ around my room when I read what you wrote. I wish I could like this 100 times
Exactly. If you scared to speak truth to him then he’s not the right one.....
When in fact they love a challenge,all the men I forced to come correct won't leave me alone till tomorrow
Bending over backwards for a man that won’t even be a stand up guy for you! Stop it!!! Thanks again TG!
His actions will show how much he respect you
Yes
“Can’t build an empire with a liar 🤥 “
Selah
Known fact sister
Quality time and "genuine" conversation equates to "intimacy."
Exactly!!! My man has been complaining that I don’t show him affection that’s why he is distant now, and I said well I don’t show you affection (kissing,sex) because your distant.
So we just going round in circles 🤦🏻♀️
🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 this is my type of intimacy! But a lot of these grown boys won’t understand that.
small11989 and for what it’s worth, if things don’t change and he does not attempt to wAnna take the time to make love to your mind, to take time out for you and not only show affection only when he wants sex, leave! I did this. I just recently got out of a relationship for this being one of the reasons. He’s a grown boy.
Which I’m having a hard time getting from my situationship... it’s easier to move on
Yes it does!!!
Ladies, put yourself 1st and love yourself. This sets the tone in a relationship. You teach a person how to treat you👍🏾
"Stop bending over backwards for a man that isn't even standing up tall for you" TY for telling it like we need to hear it!!
he aint special, he aint nobody lmaooo i really felt that
❤❤❤
We're nobody without Jesus Christ but we are somebody😊
I absolutely was raised to be a housewife...learned to cook when i was 11...was told that a man likes his dinner on the table when he gets home..I know how to sew, cook, clean , do gardening, mow the lawn, do the food shopping , do the budgeting for the home , laundry, and do you know what I got for all of this??? A NARC who appreciated NOTHING!!
Those are great skills to have and you should be proud of yourself for having them, the right person will come and see all that as a bonus
@@nikkyshamz2696 Sorry for going off...I still got some anger issues from being married to a narc for over 30 yrs...divorced now, learning from Tony & RC how to appreciate my worth
vegi girl no you have every right to go off that man wasted 30 years of your life, I’m 20 but I wasted 3 years on fuckboy then after him months later I dated a dude who wasted almost 6 months of my time( see what I said? I wasted 3 years and then the dude wasted 5/6 months of my time) and honestly I’m still mad about both but mainly the guy I dated 5/6 months because I knew him before I even dated him ( guess I didn’t know him enough) it’s a healing process I’m still going through after 2 years
@@shutit4024 Thank you for your insight. Its very difficult for woman who dont know what its like to be with a narc...its pure hell..i can always tell when another woman has been through it...im dealing with night terrors right now cause my ex used to stand over me at night sometimes and start threatening me. Like you, I met another man who seemed to be good, knew him a long time, went out briefly and thought we would get together after my divorce...wow, was i blindsided! You're right, the second one hurt alot more than my ex..i expected alot more from the friend and he totally blew my world apart. Im focusing more on myself these days and trying to forgive myself for making so many bad choices. Thanks for your support
Shoot, use those skills to make money. Then you can go on some bombbbbbbb vacations around the world multiple times a year. Boom. Then you’ll make cool new friends and business connections and buy a house in Barbados and kick it. Might even become a wife along the way, maybe not but you’ll be having the whole time of your LIFE!!!
I have HIGH SELF-ESTEEM and I have HIGH STANDARDS!
Absolutely so do I!
Yesss!! I’m very valuable and I add tax to that !!
I tested positive for being Stuck up, lol so, but I'm ok with it.
A man is a accessory NOT a necessity. 👌🏻💯
Sad thing is most women got this handed down from moms, grandmas and aunties. This is what I was told and more. We need several hours of Tony's vids to attempt to reprogram. Thanks so much for freeing the captives Tony 💕
T. L True! That is where most of the teachings come from: mama, grandma, and aunties.
I wish I could like this comment 1000 times!!!
My momma is not this way. 😆 if you don’t get what she wants she’s gone and my Aunt will tell you to kiss her you know what in a minute.
I’ve been in the process of trying to unlearn so many things I was taught or learned all of my years.
Exactly!!
Tony you are so funny! 😂 he said “don’t come talking to me about chicken nuggets being unhealthy when you got a whole baby arm in you unprotected” 💀💀💀🤣🤣🤣 so true tho!
Yesss I really cracked up when he said that!
Lmaoooo I died
He didn't lie😂😂😂😂
It is more or less the size of a baby's arm right ? ...lol
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Another awesome video. Tony, you speaking the truth. All facts!
1.Speak and be direct to your partner
2. You are not a robot
3. You not a slave to anyone
4. Know your worth and love yourself
Yup!!! He’s absolutely right!!! A healthy relationship has no gender roles. Both people play to their strengths and work together.
Funny! I was born in an Eastern European country and I was always told that a woman has to know how to cook. Pfft, please, that’s not going to get me a man or keep him. Now, living in Canada, I’ve had a Spanish guy take me out to restaurants, a Jamaican guy cook curry goat, Chinese guy cook rice & vegetables, Italian guy cook pasta con broccoli and a Dutch guy cook split pea soup with ham... My point? Men don’t need a woman to cook for them, it means nothing.
Exactly we're all adults lol
They sure don’t
SO TRUE!!! But I enjoy it -- since I have lived alone for seven years-- LOL
Facts! And often men r even better cooks or do a very decent job with making good meals. I feel that some may ask that to gauge a woman’s mental.
@@va8196 True, I saw my mother slave away cooking, cleaning, working...
I never did like cooking, I like cleaning (clean freak) and have worked since a teenager though (whether I needed to or not), because it gives me a purpose!
This video made me see why the women in my family say they're proud of me. Smh, my ex & ex-fiance knew, if they even breathed on me the wrong way I was leaving them. Hearing this breaks my heart for women who go through this. Until this video, I haven't seen, heard or experienced what Mr. Gaskins just said. Ladies, please value yourselves more than this. And same with men. Do not fall victim to a cycle of toxicity and dysfunction. May everyone stay blessed now ♥︎
It exists my sister,many solid men
.....the way I screamed when you said, “you are vegan and can’t fit through a door, you might as well eat Popeyes.” LMAOOOOOO 😩
Girl I hollered. LITERALLY
Caramel Sweet I’m vegan and I see so many fat vegans. I always looked side eyed... are you really vegan ?
Tony is too funny 😆
😂🤣🤣
Right 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂
Tony...alot of women will not admit that they do not want to be alone...they don't want their friends and family jabbing them about it...so they put up with the stuff .
I have learned that I am more valuable than being dogged out..no matter how long I have to be single!
Facts
My mother never told me I have to learn to cook for a man. I learn to cook for myself because mom got home at 5. I got home from school at 3. I was not waiting for her to get home to cook for me so I cooked for myself.
Same for me. My mom worked late.
Raised by a single parent also... a strong woman she stressed, "Im not gonna be around forever you gotta learn how to do this for yourself and your little sister". Never about a man, about survival.
There are always exceptions to the rule
Basic necessities such as cleaning ,laundry and cooking & money should be treat equally both genders.
Unfortunately many parents tend to teach that to one gender ,the girl .
So no wonder black women are more advanced in education etc
Lol forreal
Thank you Tony!!!! We need to hear this as women!!! I did this.... I tried to be everything... I cooked, cleaned, worked 40 hours a week, gave all my money to our joint account...had and took care of his baby... I didn’t season the food enough for him... I’m a RN... I’m was trying to keep him around to love and he put me down for not enough season on the food🤦🏽♀️... I was a damn fool🤦🏽♀️😳!!! I accepted it... I was miserable... depressed... in constant physical and emotional pain... I left a year ago...I’m done giving a grown boy husband privileges... I’ve been single for a year since the break up... my infant son is fatherless now... it’s hard... some days I’m lonely and miss companionship ... but God has given me so much peace, freedom, joy, and love..... God has replaced everything I thought I lost in the relationship... I thought I met my husband... Thank God it wasn’t him!!! God has my husband waiting for me... Thank God I’m growing and learning more about myself daily!!! I have a life coach and therapist...Thank you Tony for helping me prepare for my 👑 🙌🏽😘 Ladies learn from your pain... grow through it... I promise it will be worth it in the end❤️
👏👏salute!
Thank you 💯❤💫
This was beautiful ❤️
Wow! You are so right! You described my marriage that I was in for 16 years.I WAS NOTHING BUT A SLAVE TO AN ABUSIVE MAN. Thank you for being a champion for women!
So true miss Dawn . I love seeing a Grown Man that champions women... it's masculine , inspiring and uplifting!
Two aunts of mine have told me I won't get a man because I can't cook or clean well enough. My problem is to do with my disabilities. Thank you very much for telling me there are men out there that will want me for who I REALLY am!
I'm not a moderator but I definitely had someone's entire page shut down bc they said something negative about Mrs. S. Gaskins on mother's day!!! Act accordingly!!!
✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽
Us mods appreciate you sis💪🏾
@EnJoy Life And Smile I smelled those Doritos, Spicy flavor.
Thank you Tony for your Obedience to God so that we woman can gain Knowledge and not have to Parish!!!! Again Thanks
That's right keep your negative freaking comments about Sheri/Tony Gaskins to yourself!!!
Tony you are preaching the 💯% truth!!!! At this point in my life I am comfortable enough in my own skin to where I am not compromising who I am to have a man. When I need to discuss something with my partner or need to even check him about something, I don’t bite my tongue. I’m respectful but I absolutely refuse to walk on eggshells. I did that in my past marriages and I refuse to do that in my 40’s!
Exactly! I express my self and most men feel like that’s aggressive. I was like how? I didn’t raise my voice, curse or yell. I said I’m not cooking to get your approval.
Amen sis🤗😘🙏
That makes two of us sis 💯
The knowledge I’ve been getting from you has changed my life and mindset on relationships. I’m single and loving it being happy with me instead of with some cheating , lying and being disrespectful and deceitful etc. Peace be still that’s what I have in my life right now
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾💯😁
I’m so nervous to take that step! I’ve been so confused about the whole situation. So glad you found your peace.
Same here nothing like having peace in your life.
@mama Martin when u start focusing on your 3 B’s it won’t even bother u . Then u will say what was I thinking just keep yourself busy and treat yourself I go out to movies , dinners and plays by myself and love it or take my kids with me some times . Trust me it will get easier ur going to hurt yessssssss but that too shall pass . Be Blessed n safe
That part!
Show a man how much you love God by doing what God’s Word says, instead of trying to please him! Show him how much you love God❤️ , so he knows how much you love him! I don’t know about the rest of these ladies, but I’m in waiting for a man of God! If he is looking for a Godly woman he wants to know how well her prayer life is, how obedient she is to Christ, how much work is she doing for the Lord: cooking, cleaning are other aspects that are important, but “relationship” with the Creator is the most important! So many Christian women fail trying to please the creation over the CREATOR!
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🤐
Speak on it lady, they are not ready for this conversation cos they want to live how they want to live. God can't be mocked, we reap the consequences of disobedience.
One of the best posts I have read on here! Well said ❤️
Nikky Shamz Amen 🙏🏽💕
Best comment I’ve seen about this topic. There is no way around it. In order for a woman to truly know her worth, she has to know and love God First. 🙏🏽💕
Recently a friend disclosed she asked her unsaved husband his definition of a good wife. I was in shock! Tony, you described him to a tee! She quit her job to take care of him and their 4 toddler aged grandchildren. From my observation, her husband and the grandchildren’s parents act as if she is supposed to do this. I will share this video with her. Keep her in prayer. I see the toll it’s taking on her mentally and physically. Thank you Tony once again for imparting relationship gems! God bless you and the family.
I love the "never let a man see you sweat" law
It's nice to see a man in tune with a womans body and what happens to us. When a man understands that he will understand us. And I affirm that I will marry a man who doesn't expect me to be stressed out dealing with everyday chores. This is how most women live these days. Why are we expected to spread ourselves so thin that we're feel like we're gonna have a mental breakdown? To tell you the truth this is exactly how I thought until I started watching your videos.
I have never heard ANYONE be so honest about this before (man or woman) and I must say, it’s quite refreshing to hear the real deal coming from a man...The master and slave metaphor is priceless! Thank you and God Bless! 🙏🏽❤️
I did the traditional cooking for 8 every night & my husband thanked me. I taught my son to cook the basics & he cook as needed for his family. My husband retired after serving the city for 27 years AND told me I do not have to cook meals anymore. Only when I feel like cooking & that is LOVE on a platter.
Your husband sounds like a wonderful man...I know you both are lucky to have one another
During quarantine I have been teaching myself to cook because my family would make fun of me. I have had my fourteen year old little sister help me. Last week I sent some pound cake and some fudge Blondie's to my older sister and her family. An hour after leaving there my older sister texted me and said her fiance said that I can get a man cooking like that. It made me laugh. Then I was like I'm not going to hold on to that because it was just a compliment. I had to remind myself that I was cooking for myself. I didn't tell my little sister what he said because I know that she pays attention to everything I say. Instead I told her again that I want her to be able to take care of herself. I think watching you has changed the way I think. Last year I probably would have been on clouds for weeks after that compliment. I have to stay focused.
Absolutely right! Always remain humble about compliments because you never know if they are sincere. I dated a couple of guys that *thought* they could sing, and well... I was just thinking what desperate woman told you this?? But I've been guilty of giving pity compliments too lol😁
@@PeaceBeStill- lol definitely staying humble
Stay focused sister! Our little sisters and brothers and nephews and neices DO hold on to every word and ACTION we say and do. They are so impressionable. As the 'single aunty' to my nephew I make more an effort to pay attention to my behavior to set a good example, my nephew, 15, looks up to everything that I do. Now that I'm in this path and watching TG the single aunty status has a whole new meaning. You are an amazing big sister and I'm glad you didn't share that problematic comment. Be blessed.
I always told my son he needed to learn how to cook so he can keep a woman. 😁😁
Wise woman.☺
This video the truth. I was so confused in my last relationship, thinking if i be as perfect as possible, he would love me & do right by me. That relationship became the worst I've ever encountered. I was never enough, and it messed me up.
“ A lot of the men y’all serving is SORRY. “ Oooo Lord 👏🏾😌
Brotha! I Thank God everyday for you. I pray God continue to BLESS you. You help me be transformed by the renewal of my mind. Your videos give me hope, wisdom, and encouragement. Thank You so much.
Thank you Nelson for representing. So few Men are not putting the work in growing and evolving and missing out on the most beautiful gifts that true love in a healthy reciprocal relationship can provide them till death ... I wish you the best on your journey and transformation may you will be blessed with right partner for you and a life of true happiness and prosperity. 🙌🏻
@@lisaariottiart Thank you so much for the encouragement. May god bless you 🙏
🙏🙏🙏
Marriage should not be based on just sex or the slave mentality. It should be based on love, truth, faithfulness, commitment, understanding, compassion, respect, morals, values, honesty.
"If I fold it, it's gone look like I balled it up" ( folding clothes reference ) 😆😆🤣 Everything was spot on TG, I have been teaching my clients these same principles. Not only have I taught them this, but with 8yrs of faithful successful marriage I teach from the example of respecting and loving my wife I live. Women must learn that they bring value to the table because God gave them that influence.
Amen
Thank you 🙏🏻
THE BLOCK MINISTRY?!! I'M DONE!!!!😳🤣💀😂⚰️😅
Man, I had a good male friend (no sex!) That I used to cook for when he'd come to spend time with me. And whats funny is.. he hit me with, "yeah, its good to have you as a SIS" I had expressed my interest in him. And he still hit me with this energy. Ladies.. Tony tells us all the time! WE MUST NOT GIVE WIFE BENEFITS TO MEN AND GROWN BOYS WHO DONT DESERVE IT! WE ARE MORE THAN A CHEF AND MAID!!
@@BK-tp6jf Wow, haven't seen this comment in a while! But yes. In context, we had known each other for many years prior. He just wasn't Interested, period. Which was fine!
You really love your wife (and she loves herself) and you treat her as such. Good for the two of you🥇
"...I can't build a empire with a liar. I can't build a empire with a cheater..."
Serving don’t keep nooo grown boy I am witness of that!! Cook lunch n bring to work everyday for him, make salads Bc he wants it..... if he wants food I order food..... n he still went ghost and didn’t care about how I felt!!!! A grown boy is a grown boy no matter what!!!
Yep. Was bringing lunch to him literally almost everyday and would think twice to ask him to bring me anything. Always expecting me to give give give and wasn’t giving me anything at ALL. I JUST COLD TURKEY STOPPED
Tony, thanks for helping us women learn our worth.❤
Great message. I’m a teenager and especially at my age I feel the pressure to be learning how to cook and clean right now for a man. Thank you for reminding that self worth isn’t based on being in a kitchen or sweeping floors
🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂 no play boy you got to wash yo hands and take a shower. Yaaaasss Tony tell em
“Ladies we are not a piece of property, we’ll have to woman up,, we have to respect ourselves, we have to love ourselves”.-TG)Thanks for all you do. A most needed word to hear, Blessings and Favor on you and your family! 🙏
"You've got to "Woman Up" 🙌🏾I Love this message! It's something I've struggled with in my past relationships when I was younger. Being assertive and speaking my truth was Not one of my strong points. With experience I had to Woman Up real quick!
That's what I'm talking about make love to her mind...Yessss most men these days don't know how to do that....or even know how to hold a descent conversation.
How do you make love to her mind? Once you teach men that, they will put those teachings on you. So tell me please
Exactlyyyyyy . They need to learn how to communicate effectively first
Ok I got effectively communication, and being sincere what else I'm trying to win my future relationship ,thank you ladies for responding
Eric Brownlee find out her love language and love her the way she needs to be loved or feels loved, that will be making love to her mind. Also ease her burdens.
@@nikkyshamz2696 just find out her love language thank you
I bought the book “A Women’s Influence” and this book is absolutely fantastic. A must read to learn so much. Thank you Tony and Sheri Gaskins you have changed my life. 🙏🏼
Stayed in my marriage thinking he was going to change but he didn't. But I freed myself from the toxic situation still learning and growing thanks for these videos
Tony. I really appreciate this video it has opened my eyes...I’m 24 and I feel so relieved and have the tools to make the right choices. I am accepting my feminine side and it’s very powerful, instead of being angry And aggressive it’s best to just be calm and say your side. Cooking and cleaning I’m good at, but it’s not everything and I’m worth so much more, we both have responsibilities! Thank you so much. You are helping us younger people wake up and stop the nonsense and what the media has made normal.
I thank God for being mentally healthy and knowing that laying on my back and creating more soulties is NOT the way.
Tony you're talking about a REAL relationship with REAL people! Say it again! You're right on point.
“Oh you mad?” “Scratch ya booty and get glad!” Gets me every time. 😂😂😂☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️
These Stories Be All Over the Place and somehow he manages to bring it all home and Deliver the most Powerful Message! 😂 I Love It here!
This was well needed I notice women have lowered standards to be with men.. I had a man to actual tell me roles have changed .. meaning women are asking men out commitments etc., I refuse, Luke you said in the beginning what your wife said. Basically she was ok being by herself 💯❤️
@Tony Gaskins Tony, it is so heartening to listen to you speaking so profoundly about women, especially in this day and age when it's widely acceptable for women to be sexualized, objectified, scrutinized and silenced for being vocal when speaking up. I want to give you the biggest agape hug today. You are responsible for building up so many women's lives through this channel and my heartfelt gratitude to you and your family. I'm thankful to God for your wisdom and your genuine heart because you are choosing to build women instead of tearing women down.
As a conscious woman, I encourage every woman to heed what Tony is saying. Ladies, you are created to be loved, not to be enslaved by a man in the name of false love.
Tony, you’re truly a rare breed but I believe there’s still hope for us women out here lol
Yes and Amen 😊
I feel like an extension of him. I feel like a shell of the person that I used to be. He had mentally beat me down so bad that I left him. He immediately went to therapy. Upon returning home from 1800 miles away, after a week or 2, i realized that he did not change at all. Im so disgusted with him. Im also disabled so it makes it extra hard for me to leave with my possessions. Wish i could find a group or company that helps abused women to escape from their abuser
Kim Smith Where do you live? Google Shelters in your area hun.. sorry to hear that but I am sure there is help out there for you, maybe ask your worker.
@@IamKarryanne im looking online on another device right now. He moved us to Florida but i am from Michigan and that's where my family and support are at.
Kim Smith call 211 and ask for help
@@moniquethornton3032 Thank you! I will definitely do that. You must be a Floridian also. I had forgotten about 211. 💜
I grew up knowing how to cook. My Mom is single Mom and said a man is a bonus. Not an necessity. She said to me you never know what tomorrow is going to bring you have to be able to support yourself and your family and vice versa.
Im going to take this advice; im in a predicament where I have no choice but to be a single.m. Everyone is acting like I'm a bad person for not keeping my family together [even though I have valid reasons to leave]. The greatest feeling in the world is realizing no one is coming to save you. It feels like a burden that has been lifted off my shoulders.
🤣🤣🤣 When Tony used the headphones as a purse 🤣🤣🤣 I’m weak.. Put that purse on and get gone 💯💯
Girl I was laughing so hard lol
I don’t know if your able to read this, but tony I want to say thank you. Your videos has helped me to learn what it means to value and to love myself. I got your book on amazon and I’m reading it right now and highlighting important parts that stick out to me. I recently went through a break up for the millionth time with the same man of three years. And the chapter of knowing your worth is like you were talking to me. It hit home for me I wanted to cry. He didn’t respect me because I didn’t know my worth. I want to thank your absolutely beautiful wife for her parts of the book as well. She is such a strong woman with morals and values I wish every young woman will have someday. Wish she could be my big sis ☺️ I’m on page 29 and it has blessed me so much already. God bless you tony and your beautiful family, and may God continue to use you for His kingdoms sake. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
What's the name of the book?
I learned how to cook from my friend mother, she was from Mississippi she cooked three times a day, she would make butter, wine, homemade everything.
One thang bout Tony Gaskins..HE DON’T MISS! 😂🎯
Those old "Color Purple" relations! LOL!!! You are hilarious!
I respect you all around the board. I love getting advice from men about men. I could never get advice from other men it would be like pulling a tooth. I've been thru so much with a man with him being emotionally abusive, verbally abusive and mentally abusive. So i thank you im emotional over here because of some of us is so lost.
Finally someone who is saying what i known since a child. My own father said to me " no man is ever going to want you". This is cause i used my mind and told him he was no man by the way he treated my mom. Woman need to stop buying their little girls baby dolls, little kitchens, easy bake ovens. The world teaches little girls its a mans world when its not. Start talking to your daughter that they will always have you so if she needs to come home she can. Teach her to earn her self in this world and if a man wants a piece of it he got to earn her. Teach her that her body is the most precious clean beautiful temple that God gave her to be held for her husband. A boyfriend is not a commitment to anything!! Boyfriend is a mans trick to a woman by taking a space away from two words. Show them : boyfriend - boy friend!!! How does a missing space allow him to have your body now husband is a whole different word. All these weak men have called me prude, stuck up and told more than once that i value my kitty to high. What?? You dont even know my last name?? Ive never have felt so proud!!! I decided to think like i was that young girl again who defended my mom. Now im defending myself!!
The message was so strong i had to re-watch it again!!! Nothing but the pure truth in here.
Tony than told all his grandma business 🤣🤣🤣
Lol
I am not on face book, I am old school. I enjoy listening to your messages. I'm engaged, so communication is key. Glad you are real and not sitting on your gift. Be encouraged to keep sharing. I listen every day!
“It’s like Maxwell... *Tony tries to harmonize “ that took me out!! 😂💀 with the lil hand movement too.
Its so sad a lot of women don't know their worth
Don’t ever make a man see you sweat even if you have to wear a towel. I still remember when you said this on your other video . Thank you Tony 🙏🏽
Yeesssssss I remember that
Tony its the "I WAS NASTYYYYY" part that takes me out EVERYTIME😭🤣 Thanks for your honesty and transparency 💚 God bless you and yours always!
I’m happy to know that there’s men out there who don’t expect their woman to cook every single day.
Lol my ears perked up when you said that 9 out of 10 women teach they daughters to cook to get a man 😂 Tony...maybe this last generation but my generation (the millenial generation. I was born in 88) we teaching our all our children SELF SUFFICIENCY, boys and girls. Lol most of us aren't thinking about a man when we teaching our daughters and we damn sure aren't pushing gender roles. I teach my daughter FEMININITY and that has nothing to do with a man, that's about who she is. She's 7 and loves cooking (with me) and gardening. My 11 year old son is actually the cook of the family. He shops and cooks full meals believe it or not haha they daddy on the other hand...we only safe with BBQ 🤣
Yes definitely focused on femininity with my daughter, like don't wear open toe sandals and not have your toe polish ratchet! (OMG), along with teaching her how to cook which did not happen until her early twenties, and my son's cook BETTER than my daughter.. lol
@@Newladyn09 Not gone lie, I tried to go to the Home Depot YESTERDAY with sandals and some busted ass toes (just a quick run to grab some bug spray)💀💀 my daughter noticed right away! Lmao she was like "Uhhh, just take that polish off mom" 😂😂😂 but its gel from before the lockdown 🤷🏾♀️ then she goes on and on about how she never seen my toes and nails like this lmfao so I took that moment to teach her not to judge others 💀...but I did put on some sneakers tho 😭😭😭
@@8806Erika 😂😂😂, You didn't flip it on her with reversed psychology (ROTF) The teacher got taught and reminded not to go out the house looking like you haven't had home training.. !!😂😂💅💄👡
@@Newladyn09 girl! Caught 1st then taught smh wait til I catch her with some busted toes. It's going DOWN 😭
Its definitely generational my mom taught me indirectly once I left home from my calls how to do this and that..basically taught myself.
I'm okay being single after I gave my all to 2 failed marriages. Only to be left and cheated on with another woman. I was the traditional wife cooked, cleaned, blah blah blah. None of that keeps a man who don't want to be kept. It's always a women in the bushes waiting patiently for the chance to be next.🤷🏽♀️
Lol @ waiting in the bushes.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
That part! I’m with Tony’s wife, a man is an accessory not a necessity!
Right
Beware of helpful hoes. They will help themselves to your husband. Good riddance...stay playin in the trash buddy 🗑
😁😆 You are hilarious!
Spaghetti and crab salad🤣🤣😭😭😭😭
I love you Sheri Gaskins. You are a woman's role model for self care.
Keep it REAL Tony 💯
It's a lot of dishonesty & no loyalty.
It's no LOVE only demands. No RESPECT in relationships anymore.
I'm glad he shares the real on his life about how his Mom didn't cook.
Maaaann!! I loooove these videos. Tony need to be in somebody comedy show. His messages hit just right because of his intellect, knowledge, and HUMOR!!! I’m soaking up all this knowledge. It’s helped me tremendously. Lord bless Tony and family.
Tony is preaching the truth! I’m so tired of these thirsty men wanting to take advantage of us queens. A lot of men take advantage of everything a good woman brings to the table. They are definitely grown boys and need to learn how to treat a real one. For real! Thank you Tony for this message. Be blessed 🙏🏽
So true! Loyalty and honesty. Yes, you gotta have someone who will love you unconditionally(loyalty) and be able to trust that person with your whole heartand life(honesty). May I add communication because if there's no healthy communication than that person has emotional issues that need to be addressed.
I almost screamed around 12 minutes 🤣🤣🤣
Yesssss, soo funnyyyy. I screamed laughing. wait.. let me replay again 😂😂😂😂😂
Now Tony, we gon' leave alcohol outta this. A lil lime-a-rita paired with sunflower seeds never hurt nobody. 😣😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lol
A mango margarita for me 😄
Yesss😁
@@kurtrinamckinnon4214 😂😂
Hey Tony a few months ago I was going through a lot I was so depressed until I came upon ur videos and began to pray more and harder I am now finding my peace. I was engaged about to be married until he broke down and walk out saying he needs his space...I was so in love with this man know its my first time I ever loved a man like this...I always have my guards up but for some reason I let it down for him...after he left I felt like I was nobody I cant do with out him...and let me tell u the man up about hold my hand and took me through the fire....instead of asking him to take me out, i asked him to walk with me through it..but eventually I broke it off eventhough I broke it off I was still around just thinking the maybe but now I put my trust in God and honestly I do not want a man in my life when is the right time God will place him in my life...I just want to say to many ladies out there the war is not with flesh and blood but of the spiritual realm pick up ur harmor and go to war...do not let the devil break you have a bless day.
Females in my family used to say you need to learn how to cook to get a man/husband
This was real talk from the beginning to the end. I always wondered was a man capable of understanding any of this. It's sobering to see a man say this so we can clearly see that it is selfishness and immaturity that causes a man to treat a woman like a servant. Let's wise up and rise up women! We deserve better but won't get it if we settle for less...
21 years old I grew up south out fatherly advice I’ve been listening and applying to my life and I see all the results . Making a man respect me is a thing I’m proud of
YOU AINT NEVER LIED! I stop cooking after my kids were grown. I Dont cook or make groceries....I did because I had to for my family! Now IM COOKING FREE🤣🤣