Yes, it really brought me back to when I'd visit the HS where my mom taught History and Government. I'd sit like a nice, grownup little lady pretending not to mind the teachers' smoke.
My mum was very emotionally cold and everything was about her......I remember as a child a babysitter hugged me and showed me the first bit of affection I had ever experienced. I remember my sadness and how I clung to her when she had to leave. It made me realise what affection was. I remember the pain of her leaving was all consuming!
I was married to a man like that. He worked two jobs to avoid the difficult job of raising our kids, and was highly critical, of the limits I set. He often let the kids out of punishments and the limits I set. I tried many years and once the kids were grown (which definitely felt like a prison term), I divorced him. My second husband was the exact opposite of my first husband! I was a full time step mum to two of his four kids. This experience was so enjoyable, I almost hated to see them grow up. So, I learned then, it wasn’t totally “me”, it was the lack of “us” that was the problem. Sadly, the people we love, sometimes ARE NOT the people we should have kids with. 😞
Yes . We’ll put . Mine was very course towards me . And I’d beg her to not go to work but I know she had to . I lived with her but I didn’t see her much . I stay with my grandparents a lot . And I love them all to this day but I strive to be more like my Nana . She was a sweet soul and made sure we had grocerys . She was my fathers mom . He was in prison his whole life so she and my granddaddy tried to make up for his absence . My father was adopted . And I’m so thankful he was ♥️
Me too. I didn't know how to act on rare occasions when anyone showed any affection..i was NEVER hugged or told i love u! Never heard my mother say it & when i told my dad once that i loved him his response was.."i know" ! 😂😅😂! Unbelievable! No hugging, or ur amazing, talented, pretty (&i was very pretty once i hit about 17) nothing at all to validate me as a worthy human being..needless to say i had a lot of problems growing up..
"After you've given him a beating, do you feel he's learned something?" "No." "Did you learn something?" "No." "How angry are you when this happens?" The whole inteview with the mother is so good, this doctor was amazing...
With the way this is filmed, I would say the 'mother' is played by an actor. Did they use two camera back in the 1960s for tv shows? No, just one. So why and how can a low budget training video afford to have two camera men catching each of their facial expressions going back and forth?
Beautiful but emotionally repressed woman, with an emotionally distant husband. The child wasn't loved because the parents had not been loved themselves. All of them needed help.
I'm a step dad to a boy that has aggressive tendencies at school. This video has opened my eyes to many things I didn't know. His dad wasn't there. He craves male companionship so much. But he also needs male kindness and love.
Being a parent is hard, being a step parent is harder. Blessings to you and upon your journey as you try to heal that which you did not hurt and in breaking those cycles.
@@TinnyDee thank you so much!!! We've definitely made a lot of progress. I've definitely noticed that being tender with him and very soft spoken has helped. Him seeing a big man be sweet and kind is not something he is used to. It's opening his eyes to how he can be too if he tries.
I was a step mother to a boy like this. Nothing I said or did made a change. My ex expected me to change the boy. I had a 3 year old,this kid was 6. Never had any consistency in his life. He was aggressive with my child. Yet the boys father never spent time with him or showed genuine affection. It was a living hell.
@@janetsides901 spending time with them and showing genuine affection is the key. I'm sorry that you had to live through this. The task of raising a young boy should have been more on him (the dad) than anything. I'm sorry if this sounds wrong, but it's a man's job to teach his son (or step son) how to be a man.
Mom was there for him, seeked for help, shared personal info, gave permission to record material other people would be ashamed of, reflected on her feelings and thoughts, and accepted openly criticism. She's brave and worths nothing but recognition -at least half a century later-, keep in mind that therapy was deeply connected with stigma at the time, and still is. She was also experiencing abuse, she deserved a better life but was still caring to save her son's. Even though the mother of "the child" maybe wasn't the most highly educated concerning parening issues, he should feel proud about her and lucky to have her.
I had a little boy at my school, who was overly aggressive and I told him since he was so much bigger he was like one of the teachers, and told him instead of hitting someone, to come to me, and tell me what was going on, and we could come up with ideas on how things could be better. It worked. Also he never wanted to clean up the class, so I would ask him where things went and he helped me put things away.
@@UNIXSOLJASysadminSyndicate not exactly. People have always had varied opinions but official government PSAs and national ads have convinced (certainly modern Americans) that everyone thought a certain type of way “back then”. I should also add that slavery has always been controversial throughout cultures and history. The Christian bible described enslaved minorities who fought against it. The evil acts of Christopher Columbus were in defiance of the Catholic Church who told him to stop. This is just one example of how people have always had diverse views and these evil things were never just “normal”.
Wow, can you imagine a therapist being able to cuddle these days... I trained to be a counsellor for a couple years and that was one of the things I found regretful, that we couldn't even give an adult, some of whom sorely needed human touch, a (brief) hug of sorts. I understand why it's not possible but firmly believe that in some situations it would do a world of good.
The moment the therapist said he loved him, something magical happened: He started getting through to the child. The child began to listen and to learn. Amazing.
Teared up watching this. I'm a teacher who teaches kids like this. This boy reminds me of one of my students. He was expelled from a previous school due to his behaviors. Through patience, kindness, encouragement, and genuine affection, I've earned his trust & seen improvements in his behaviors. Never underestimate what genuine love & kindness can do for a child. Often the difficult ones need it the most.
@@lemonstealinghorsdoeuvre they are mentioning this cause this happens a lot in real life as well..a lot of the blame of emotional education is placed on the mother..not always just I see it happen a lot
@@audas she doesn't suggest blaming the father for anything. Your personal bias came up with that. All she said is there is only one part of the story visible and that everyone tends to be blaming the extremely attractive mom, and for all we know the father could be far worse of an influence. All we know is that the kid is annoying, the mom is hot, and you are easily triggered. Anita applied thought, you applied prejudice.
So true! I've spent a boatload of money on therapy to try to undo my childhood. It's been money well spent. My parents were the worst bullies. I wouldn't treat an enemy the way they treated me and my sisters. Horrific things went on behind closed doors. It is stopping with me, though. The generational trauma ends here. Too bad I'm too scarred to want children 😂 🙃.
That was very telling when he was worried about getting paint on his hands and said “uh oh, I’m afraid, cause mommy’s gonna give me a hit”. then right after he says “the mother is going after the baby, she’s gonna spank the baby” then says “the father is going to spank the mother, then the mother is going to spank the baby”. A cold household where everyone tries to impose their dominance over the weaker members. No wonder the boy is aggressive. He has to be when the whole family dynamic is based on a power struggle. The weak get spanked. Then submits to the aggressor. That’s how you get what you want. The poor boy didn’t invent that. He learned it from his empathetically bankrupt parents.
@@seeker8097 Yes.... Oh as we live, we learn. Or supposed to anyway. My parents were never parented. But they did a decent job considering. I have found so much compassion for people now.
The father is not supporting His wife when she tells the child not do something. He is being an enabler in the child's oppositional defence. He is rearing his son to be sociopathic. And misogynistic.
It broke my heart how quickly the boy calmed down when the therapist hugged him…. All he needed was empathy, kindness and patience but his parents and even teachers failed him :(
Which annoys me because the mother towards the beginning said "" He has everything he wants and needs "" its a Shame some parents fail to see the very thing the child needs is love, attention, kindness, empathy etc. She sometimes refers to the child as "" IT"" 🥺 hurt adults going on to have hurt children
So if I broke your nose punching you in the face you would think I'm just looking for love and affection? Sometimes I know it's hard for most people to grasp but people give into the monster that is human nature rather than fight it... Even in loving environments this can happen and has
Did u watch the video? Obviously every case is different and what u said is a possibility, but we just watched a 30 minute case study on this child. How can u compare that to ur dumbass walking up and punching someone and argue that anyone would call them similar situations??
I just love that little boy's therapist. He is so sensitive, and so helpful for this child. I do hope that these sessions help him so as he grows, he is able to leave this behind.
@@dawndoliber2663 Running cell block D and has all his bitches in a row so he can punch them for getting ink on their hands, mind you his cell block is the cleanest in the whole prison system.
What helped me the most with raising my children was the book ‘Raising Warriors: Preparing Your Children For a Godly Life’. It is honestly a game changer
Early teaching of real things things works much better than going along with those dangerous religious fantasies. The whole beer on Friday Sports on Saturday church on Sunday never works out.
I have worked in early childhood education for 40 years and the look on a child’s face at 4 years old when you say you are a clever kind ,good boy is priceless. It like they have never heard these words before heartbreaking
The psychologist was using collaborative problem solving! That's an excellent technique for oppositional and violent children. He was ahead of the time.
The boy was so preoccupied with his toys, while the doctor spoke to him. But when the boy heard the words... "love you", he stopped what he was doing, looked the doctor in the eyes and asked "you love me?".... this poor kid probably never heard anyone say that to him, his whole life. Now we see the root cause of his aggressive behavior.
His mother referred to him as 'the child'. Very impersonal. I was a child in the 50's/60's and had a very kind & caring mother. We were working class so didn't have much in the way of possessions. Love is free. Myself & most of my close friends were not disciplined in a physical way so had a good childhood. School however showed us a different side to life. Corporal punishment was prevalent. Watching 'rude' children being struck with a leather belt did not help them or those of us that had to watch. The usual recipients ended up getting in trouble with the police or dying young due to taking drugs. A long time ago now but never forgotten. Violence can begat violence. At least it did in our school 😢
@@msch7620Correct, he paid attention the whole time, but it seemed as though he wasn’t, especially when juxtaposed against his reaction to those magical words.
To be honest, he understood more than this time even. Adults and parents lack the interest in really understanding the child. They don't realize that what they need is love and affection. Now parents just shove phones, tablets, or TVs in their children's faces to not deal with them. We really haven't progressed, now parents just abuse their children with neglect. Maybe if more parents watched this video, they'd be inspired to help their kids more.
At first I thought the kid was a future serial killer until the dr/therapist said I love you and saw the boys reaction. Poor little guy. Just needed love.
When I was a kid grown, people were adults and behaved that way, and this is how people spoke to each other most of the time. By the time I was in my 20s, during the nineties, it had become very difficult to find someone to have a real conversation with. Instead, people mostly would just talk at each other; wait for each other to shut up so that they could say what they wanted to say.
@@phillippereira6468He felt that the father got the show of warmth and affection , that he craved, She could show it to her husband, but not to her child.
I think this boy wil be a good man, he has to much energy doest know what to do with it. I see these children are sometimes agressieve but that comes that people and other children become always angry at such childeren till now you see they are most atta. by other children or adults who cant handle the way those children act. Then you see someone intelligent and nice comes and take time to talk in a smart way with them or love to play with them you see them become like a totally different child a happy and quit child . You see it when the dr hold him he is just happy and play like most childeren.
What a surprisingly sweet doctor for the time period, very well educated and gentle but mature approach with the child. Would've loved a doctor to talk to me the way he did, when I was the childs age.
There's always been sweet doctors that cared and knew what they were doin. (In all medical fields) Problem is they're the exception to the rule. And there has to be the luck of the people needing their particular style of caring and relating actually finding them.
When I was 11 years old, I was seeing a psychiatrist, had toys, there were other kids there also. I went through all kinds of hearing testing. I recall the doctor and staff all very nice and caring. This would have been about 1963. Of course, I only realized what was going on later in my teens after asking my mother about it. I wasn't an aggressive student as here, but I was acting out in class and under performing in spite having high scores on intelligence test for the time. Turns out it was due to my relationship with my father. He got involved and apparently all worked out for the better.
"There must be a good reason why you fight all those kids" Such an amazing doc! the best way to help someone with troubled behavior is to be understanding and loving ~
Ngl, Doctor seems pretty awesome. I tend to look back on mental health and behavioral practices from that time period with a bit of horror. But I was pleasantly surprised by this interaction.
Seen The Madman and the Professor? (Just for the odd kind doctor in a 19th century asylum that are usually portrayed as inhumane...). Decency is decency, throughout time
@@sarahg2653 oops. I'm back to front. It's the Professor and the Madman. Dunno where you're at with Mel Gibson but I think he's a good actor despite personal difficulties... Creative arts are full of people with problems, sometimes it's tricky. Like, I loathe Polanski personally but I can't boycott his films! Rotten Tomatoes slayed Professor and the Madman but I found lots to like in it, plenty indeed....
I am impressed with the professional knowledge and skill of the therapist. He is an excellent orator who explains his points concretely, and all the while engaging the parent in thought-provoking conversation.
That couple should never have had a child. That child is starved of affection - when the doctor said ‘I love you’ his little face lights up. Broke my heart.
Isn’t this the 60s? Back when they started medicating women and telling them their work in the home was of less value than outside the home? Obviously medicated women was just a fraction of the amount of women that are medicated today. But the medication’s just create a false sense of control, they don’t actually make things better, so often people who lash out in extreme ways, seemed like zombies on their medication’s, but their opinions and deeply rooted issues were never altered, just temporarily suppressed. Don’t forget her father was probably a World War II soldier and this was also during the time when people pulled away from the morals of the church at home and school and experimented with everything. They look proper, but is that just facade?
actually you're completely wrong the kid isn't acting up because the mother is angry at herself, no, according to the video the mother is angry at herself because the kid is acting up it's the exact opposite, if you paid a little bit of attention you wouldn't have typed this useless comment
My mother is an early childhood teacher. In behavioural reports that go to parents I’ve seen that they use Initials or ‘the other child’ or ‘Other’ for safety reasons - protecting that child from identification by strangers - an example was a choking incident like the video, the mother of the choked child was extremely protective and threatened to sue (can’t sue in New Zealand) the parents of the child when they found out who they were. To avoid the whole mess and others like it, my mother used fake initials, ZT, to which the mother was looking on the birthday wall for the initials. Her plan apparently was to find the child, wait with them, and threaten the parents. Nut jobs are why nut rules are in nut place.
@@geminiwriter8875 Yup Licensed k-12/special ed teacher k- 8 over here. Written a fair share of IEP's. Parenting/environment is huge on the development of a child....fu**ing obviously...but, neurology/brain structure is a large part of "dysfunction"/(abnormalities as well), too. Pardon poor grammar, as I am talking to text on the go..., obviously. I will say that in homacidal cases especially, when the *past tense* is used/not the names etc, that is a red flag for sure, as mentioned.
@@natalie9884 well, the kid its aggro because his mother beat the sht up of him everytime he behaves like a child, he is just mimicking his own experience
I feel like his mother deep down cares. I mean she agreed to seek help. That’s a start. I see her smiling as she was watching her son play. Parenting is not easy. I hope she got the help she and her son need. And hopefully her marriage as well.
I'd argue the evidence you give supports the idea of the mother caring about her appearance. When she was smiling, it looked like relief that the kid saw the parents as loving and showed people that. Did she care? I think so. Was she more selfish than caring? I can definitely see it being possible. Was she more focused on herself when she was under stress? After the kids description of the birds he painted, I'd say likely. Is there a second appearance of the blobfish? Yep 25:54
@@lemonstealinghorsdoeuvre Selfish or not selfish, self focused or self conscious, what matters is that the channel she has with the child works such as providing love, assertive communication, limits, etc.
It dawned on me that the mom says the dad is European. This is 1960. Which means this precious little boy had one parent coping with the trauma of growing up during WWII. My husband's grandmother lived through the Battle of Berlin. My mother in law was raised in a very abusive, emotionally cold, distant, household. A traumatic household in its own way because of what her mother lived through and never got help for. I just imagine that must have played at least some significant role. Never underestimate generational trauma.
Well, that would be all of my great grandparents and grandparents. My grandmother was evacuated from London during the Blitz. My grandad was in the Royal Navy. They weren’t cold and horrible!
@@pommiebearsit depends on the people but generally speaking, times were insane and abuse pretty normalized, sadly. It's a whole generational trauma thing.
@@pommiebears I didn't speak for all of the survivors of WWII. My grandparents were in the USA, were well off in adulthood and my maternal grandmother had 6 kids that raised themselves essentially because her career and social life came first. She was just selfish, no trauma. Some people who go through actual warfare trauma might become emotionally stunted at the age they were damaged, thus having Children of their own... They're unable to connect to them in a mature, nurturing manner you'd expect from a stable adult.
@@philima Right! You didn't have the widespread understanding of trauma and abuse we have today. Your average person didn't get therapy. So trauma and abuse got passed on, sadly.
It was so normal back in the day 😂. She wasn’t tryna hide it either it’s so funny and weird how Normal it was back in the day . Knowing she could smoke at work is crazy
I used to work at Trader Joe’s and my boss told me about how the checkout all used to have burn marks on them from employees placing their cigarettes down to bag the groceries (back in the day) 😂. Times have sure changed!
I notice in the comments people saying "We grew up under these and we ended up ok", but honestly, no I don't think you did. The children of the 60's have many many issues that they passed on to their children.
We owned our own preschool for 45 years. Each child was given a warm hug when entering their classroom each morning. Hugs were always welcome throughout the day.
@@SerenDipity64711at my kids' school they are absolutely allowed to comfort them. it's a small private school though. My oldest just started public school so I'm not sure of the difference yet. I'm sure they are allowed to offer some comfort. Maybe not physical (I'm not sure) but definitely with words.
are you in the UK? A friend of mine who ran a nursery for 40 years, told me recently how things used to be.They could kiss children's knees better, if they had a fall but not anymore! If a child needs a plaster put on, they have to phone a parent for permission!@@DSDaly
People are saying the mom is closed and cold. Buts she’s open and honest and she’s willing to participate in all of this. Such a good episode. I think she just didn’t know better.
Well, here's what's going on and it happens today, It's domestic violence, the father is beating the wife. The child is showing that the alligator is his father, he's showing how dad loves on mom but turns into a beast. The child wants love from the father ...the doctor is what the child wants because he affectionate, the mother is angry at the father and taking it out on the child because she sees the father in the boy.
@@SpicyGramCracker That child is going to grow up beating on his own wife. The father is not present in this scenario, where's the father?? He's absent. This is a good example of why children need a loving FATHER in the home. If we can recognize domestic violence, we can stop the cycle of it. BUT the cycle continues til this day.
When a child gets labeled as “trouble” how he is treated by adults changes. He’s “trouble” and it follows him everywhere. Sad because children need LOVE. Love cures a lot! ❤❤
That's mirroring and children do for many years in early developments try to be what their parents let him know about who they are reflect positively and child developed a healthier self images of their own existence
These two doctors did a marvelous job unpacking the story for this poor kid. The way he melted into the arms of that gentle psychiatrist 😢. They were just in time.
The therapist is very good. I don’t think the mother really enjoys being a mother which is at the root of his misbehavior. His misbehavior functions as a way to keep his mother involved with him.
Mother is focused on herself: "there's something that makes you feel like a failure." Bad behavior may be an attempt to get mother to focus on the child.
@@shelleyoxenhorn833 well, if it were the only "project" in your life and it failed, you would feel similar as her. and if on top of that she had inferiority complex, than it makes even more sense.
@@shelleyoxenhorn833 I know it's easy to look down upon her but has anything changed today? Mothers are still under enormous pressure and I know a lot of them who routinely ask themselves those self-centered questions of "Do people think I'm a bad mother and a failure?" despite having their kids best interest at heart. It's hard to shun other people's opinions when it comes to emotionally loaded topics of family and raising children.
All that little boy needs is someone to hug him and tell him they love him.The way he reacted when the the therapist said he loved him.smh he acted surprised that anyone could love him.The problem Was the parents not the child
One of the best templates for raising kids: If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn. If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight. If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy. If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty. If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient. If a child lives with encouragement, he learns confidence. If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate. If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice. If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith. If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself. If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he learns to find love in the world.
Indeed. It's trickle down. The husband beats the wife. The wife beats the child. And then child will mess up their kids if he has any. My mom is very stand-offish too. Doesn't even like to be touched. At all. I can't remember the last time I got a hug from her. Usually around once a year, if I'm lucky. Fortunately, my dad is more affectionate. Of course, he had a messed up childhood too. His mom would go to restaurants and eat in front of him while she made him stand outside and watch her eat. Good times...
This doctor is so kind and affectionate; so gentle with this angry little boy. This was so touching. It’s clear Phillip is missing out on basic affection and gentle loving and tender care. So sad!
@@michaelfornell4467 Did you miss the entire point of the video?? The child was missing affection so he addressed that issue perfectly and helped him. I hope you don't have any children because they will turn out just like Philippe. A man showing affection to a child is perverted??? You're an imbecile.
@@michaelfornell4467why is hugging and holding a young child inherently sexual? He didn’t have a healthy experience of parental love, so it seems like the psych was trying to show by example what love feels like. children NEED to be held and loved for neurological development.
Please don’t make sexual jokes or advances or swear God wouldn’t like that and there are children here May God bless you and your family and help you Give your life to Jesus Christ and repent. I pray that God will lead on the path to Jesus Christ and send the Holy Spirit to be your helper. I pray this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ I pray Amen! Jesus Christ loves you. Give your life to Jesus Christ and ask for forgiveness for ALL OF YOUR SINS. Even the ones committed in the past and repent. He’s coming soon. Please pray and repent. GOD IS ALPHA AND OMEGA!!! THE BEGINNING AND THE END!!! GOD SENT HIS SON DOWN TO DIE ON THE CROSS FOR OUR SINS. PLEASE GIVE YOUR LIFE TO HIM!!! PRAY AND REPENT AND GOD IS COMING!!!!!! THERE IS NO TIME. FELLOW CHRISTIANS GOD WILL BE COMING DON’T LOSE FAITH!!! PLEASE!! PRAY FOR STRENGTH AND DON’T DOUBT HIM!!! Romans 10:9 “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” Romans 10:10 “For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.” 2 Peter 3:1-18 “1 This second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in both which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance: 2 That ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour: 3 Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts, 4 And saying, Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation. 5 For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water: 6 Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished: 7 But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men. 8 But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. 9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. 10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up. 11 Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness, 12 Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat? 13 Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness. 14 Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless. 15 And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you; 16 As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction. 17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness. 18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.” concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. 10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up. 11 Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness, 12 Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat? 13 Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness. 14 Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless. 15 And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you; 16 As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction. 17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness. GOD JESUS CHRIST AND THE HY SPIRIT IS ALPHA AND OMEGA!! 18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.” GOD, JESUS CHRIST, AND THE HOLY SPIRIT IS ALPHA AND OMEGA.l
02:52 THERES THE PROBLEM!!! Doc says so himself: you had whippings and punishments...no wonder he's like that! Agression is the only method he knows and he got it from his parents!!!
Look how that little boys aggression melted once he got a hug and told he was loved .. the mother also recognised where she was going wrong and got the help she needed 👏🏾
Its not just a hug but a hug from a Man. He wants Real attention from his Father, not just the dismissive attention he gets by quickly getting his way.
@@deenad3562 Take your blinders off. This wasn't all about the boys father, in fact as a primary caregiver his relationship with his mother was likely more important at that moment.
This therapist is so amazing, especially for the 60s. He's so sweet with "the child". The mother was just like my mother. No love, no affection, only screaming and abuse. I thought every family was like this 😢
Sorry to hear that you felt unloved. My folks were a bit like that too, no hugs ever. They were good parents in other ways but lacking in affection. Even now at 82 years old if try to hug them they tense up and get embarrassed. Grandparents were the same. I mean I knew they loved us kids, but they just never said it or showed it. I remember one day my Aunt (not a blood relative) hugged me for some reason. I kinda just froze and thought "this is weird" but maybe that was because I never really liked her that much. Anyway, I try to do better with my daughters because I realise now how important it is for kids to know they are loved.
I don’t know. I have to say the therapist kind of creeped me out. He kept invading the boy’s personal space and getting way too close. I think the boy probably suffered from ADHD.
I thought that's the way they spoke at the time. I actually thought the mother was a good mother for seeking help and taking advice so well. The therapist is brilliant, I wonder who he was.
This was me. I was very similar to Phillip. My parents didn't change, however. I found the love I needed from other caretakers. Babysitters, tutors, teachers, psychiatrists. I knew that I couldn't be all bad if at least some people who knew me well loved me.
It wasn't that they didn't love you, they didn't understand you and felt like failures. People who feel like failures but lack coping skills often behave aggressively and/or distant from the child because they feel helpless. And helpless people develop apathy.
Sounds familiar. I was the black sheep and my mother seemed to not like me. As you say, if other people liked me I figured it must be my mom who had the problem. Still painful though.
Thank you for sharing that. I am the warmth and love for my grandson. My daughter, his mother, is cold like this. He has no father around at all. I often wonder if all of the affection and care I give him will be enough. Your comment gives me hope.
Good for you, I was taken from my destructive mother at the age of 8 and instantly put on medication the minute she left the hospital, been passed around my whole life since then, never attached to anyone. I'm turning 28 this year never worked & have no friends I did try for the past years and clawed my way threw my trauma with the help of social workers. Became more stable and able to live on my own for about a year now. Sadly I see no way of ever being a productive part in this society. At least I'm not bothering anyone and manage somehow. can't say the same about my siblings. People shouldn't be allowed to have children without a license IMO.
As old as this is it's spot on. This kid wanted affection between his parents instead of the father abusing his mother and in turn for himself. He was denied this and so acted out in frustration and attention seeking. I hope he and his parents got on the right path though I suspect divorce was imminent.
Nah. I reckon you were right about divorce and I bet he continued to become an even bigger arsehole. His behaviour was established and so was the parents. I've seen boys like this.
When i saw the mother's dead eyes and the father's lack of presence i knew he was an abuser. By the end of the film it was confirmed. The mom and child could have stood a chance emotionally on their own, but back then most women stayed married to their abusers. With his money and power she didnt stand a chance in those times.. even today the rich abusers almost always get their way. I hope the mom can stop the cycle, but with "father" running interference and putting down/disrespecting the mom, poor kid probably grew up abusing as well unless this treatment really made a strong impression and continued for years.
Divorce... what a perfect word, lol. I also thought that. My parents are like this too, the only difference is that they practically played me. Before they hated the sh*t out of each other, then they came back together and I was on the verge of killing. I'm STILL on the verge of killing. So, to this day, I still hurt myself when frustation becomes too much to handle. If I hadn't a brother, I wouldn't have ANYTHING to leave behind in that f*cking house. I'm so sad for him. I can't help him, since I'm a toxic person myself.
I can relate with this boy. Only child, alcoholic workaholic mom, depressed father with unregular income. My mom was the breadwinner therefore tired and hungover and doesn’t have time for me.
The doctor almost seems like a time-traveler, he's so wise and empathetic for the time. Obviously not everyone from that time were cold or backwards thinking, but it's kind of striking to see in an informative video like this.
I know right?! Most doctors would’ve immediately put that boy in a psyche hospital and have him take a handful of meds to put him in a zombie state. Just like JFK’s sister Rosemary who was put away and had a lobotomy done
I really don't think most therapists, pychiatrist, etc. were all that different. I believe it is most people now who have a warped view of history. This is because what we hear about the practices of the past are mostly accounts of extreme cases. Granted there were some widespread issues, especially with institutiinalization; however, working in the mental health field for the last 15 years, I am not convinced that the current practices are substantial improvements. Many continue to be institutionalized, it has just taken a different form, one with broader implications and harm to communities. I am not advocating going back, mind you, just that the field has not made the progress many seem to believe it has.
@@TheJohmac my fathers youngest brother was “put away” in a psychiatric hospital because he was out of control. My fathers family didn’t want to be “associated” with him or have others know that their son was mentally ill. He was in there in the mid 1960’s. They were well known in their community and couldn’t have a child who was “different” and rarely ever visited him. I met him once when I was about 5 years old and remember seeing him sitting in a chair just staring at the wall. My father tried talking to him and he wouldn’t respond. The visit was maybe 5 to 10 minutes until my father said, “Let’s go, I don’t know why I even bothered to see him anyways.” I was confused what was going on and asked my father if, “ everything was okay?” He said, “Yes, everything is fine, don’t worry, we won’t ever come here again.” I couldn’t ask him who that man was until many years later because he would get so upset every time I would bring it up. I never saw him again and learned that he died in there a few years later. It has always bothered me how my grandparents just got rid of him because they didn’t want to be embarrassed.
22:36 I grew up in a household typical of the 1960's. My mother was a housewife and didnt work, and my father left the house at 615am before my brother and I were up for school. Then he would return at 730-745 pm and we had already eaten and were getting ready for bed. So my fether was pretty absent, although he was present, my parents were married 50 years. My father did not show much affection to us kids at all. My mother did as much as a mother was supposed to but even she did not show much more affection than that was required. Now I am 60 and I have two boys and always showed physical affection toward them. I believe it was because of the times and generation we were brought up in. I dont remember seeing lots of affection even in my close friends households in the 60's. It was more about raising your children to be polite and respectful of their parents back then. Although with the love and affection I provided to my boys, they were very polite and respectful too. I think they wanted to please their father and I even more. I guess what Im trying to point out is that everyone feels better when they are loved!
My mom said i was loved by her when i was 52 years old. How different my life would have been if i knew it 40 years ago?. Now as a mothef myself, i realize she did love me always ❤️ Very simple medicine
This poor kid lit up like a Christmas tree when the doctor said he loved him, and the lad even asked joyfully, “You love me?!” I think this poor kid didn’t feel loved by his parents, and when he rationalized why not, he obviously told himself it was because a bad kid and decided he was on his own.
Yeah, when he later says his mum would hit him when he feels bad for her after her husband hit her explains a lot. He was on his own, anything he did he must have been afraid he will be abused for.
@@moos5221Lol My parents were exactly the same in the 2000s (father beats mother -> mother beats children). I don't think lil dude was afraid to be abused but probs was always told he's bad so it becomes like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Why even try when no one recognizes the little positive things anyways?
The mother obviously had absolutely no true sympathy, empathy, or even fond thought about her own son. Her eyes, the stillness of her facial movement(s); She is numb to him. You could hear his pain when he asked, do you love me. My heart breaks for him and is thankful the doctor gave him the love he deserves. Even if only for a short time.
"Cause I'm afraid, my mother's gonna give me a hit." "mummy spanks the baby? How does the baby feel?" *He makes a crying noise* "Who fights in your family?" "Mama and Papa" "And what do you feel like when they have an argument?" "I feel like I'm sad"
@ 3:18 "You love me?" That innocent little face...my heart absolutely sank 🥺💔 It's obvious that what he's lacking is affection, and protection. Wrap your arms lovingly around your children, they are the most precious jewels you will ever have.
I went my whole life not being told I was loved. At age 50, I finally asked my mother. Her response was,”Well, you know I can’t talk about these things….” She just couldn’t say it or show it. Something awful.
His parents are emotionally cold and rife with denial. She never refers to him by name, rather as “the child”. The source of his issues are quite apparent.
His mother is emotionally distant from her child, so he fights other kids and disobeys authority to get attention since he's getting little from his parents. Hence, the curious interest on his face when he asks the doctor, "do you love me?"
That is what they want you to believe . ..that was the faulty idea of psychology at that time ...but I'm sure she feels on gaurd with all these men . Her child is special needs .
@@19katsandcounting It's simply not true that boys are more difficult. He wasn't getting his needs met from either parent. Your bias toward women is showing. This is about the child, not the mother being a victim.
So heartbreaking, its not the boy that has the problem, he is reacting to his abusive parents. Hope they got the help they needed. If he lives today he is over 60.
When the doctor asked “who do you think is the most important person to him?” I cried. Children really just want love from their most important person.
This ended with the mother and father are fighting all the time. Domestic violence. This 1960s family is involved in domestic violence and it's rubbing off on the children. This problem in 1960 is no different that now domestic violence and children in the middle
@@MD-gw4rkyup it’s DV mixed with ADHD. You can see the ticks he has all throughout the video. The PTSD is him trying to have control whenever something is overwhelming, especially if there’s shouting and yelling. Fight, flight or freeze happens when you are triggered while you have PTSD.
@@Krazycougar22 I don't think they are simulating that. It's domestic violence. Children that young are being taught at such an early age, as young as that child, to grow up beating thier own spouse. If parents showed love, affection, and disapline without screaming at your children, they will grow up healthy and happy. Set boundaries with your children. If they do wrong, correct them, but after you correct them, explain WHY they're doing wrong. Be consistent with your children. Parents NEED to stop trying to override each others type of disapline. Be consistent with them.
@@Krazycougar22 It's not hyper active disorder, the child is playing out his father's behavior by using the alligator as the beast represents his father's abusive nature. He acting up because he is seeing his mother get beat up ...she turns around and takes it out on the kid. he's weaker than the mother, so she will hit him too. Children are naturally hyper active. It's not a "disorder". I don't believe in hyperactive disorder. Children are hyper. They need stimuli, they need attention from the parents who raise them. Not drugged up and act like zombies.
@@Krazycougar22Another diagnostician rather than a rational analysis. Doping some kid up on drugs will ruin his life, you realize Ritalin is pretty much the same thing as methamphetamine right?
Teacher sitting there with a smoke. Times have changed.
Yes, it really brought me back to when I'd visit the HS where my mom taught History and Government. I'd sit like a nice, grownup little lady pretending not to mind the teachers' smoke.
I caught that immediately
She looks like she's had a fkin hard life
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
At their time being a smoker is a casual normal habit.
3:19, when he asks “ you love me?” to the doc…..that’s a very telling moment
Damn, if the child would be an adult asking that, the adult would scream it out.
What a heartbreaking silent scream for affection and (parent) love.
I came here to make that exact comment.
Yes. Absolutely, that’s the core /cause of his bad behavior.
A child that fails to feel the warmth of his village, will burn it down just to feel it’s warmth.
I'm probably stepping on a landmine by asking this, but what is Telling about the lad?
My mum was very emotionally cold and everything was about her......I remember as a child a babysitter hugged me and showed me the first bit of affection I had ever experienced. I remember my sadness and how I clung to her when she had to leave. It made me realise what affection was. I remember the pain of her leaving was all consuming!
Your mom might have had the same experience from her parents. Sometimes we need to learn to forgive and forget
@@derinok9833 I'm not like that with my children though....you can change the pattern so if I can change why can't she?
I was married to a man like that. He worked two jobs to avoid the difficult job of raising our kids, and was highly critical, of the limits I set. He often let the kids out of punishments and the limits I set. I tried many years and once the kids were grown (which definitely felt like a prison term), I divorced him. My second husband was the exact opposite of my first husband! I was a full time step mum to two of his four kids. This experience was so enjoyable, I almost hated to see them grow up. So, I learned then, it wasn’t totally “me”, it was the lack of “us” that was the problem. Sadly, the people we love, sometimes ARE NOT the people we should have kids with. 😞
Yes . We’ll put . Mine was very course towards me . And I’d beg her to not go to work but I know she had to . I lived with her but I didn’t see her much . I stay with my grandparents a lot . And I love them all to this day but I strive to be more like my Nana . She was a sweet soul and made sure we had grocerys . She was my fathers mom . He was in prison his whole life so she and my granddaddy tried to make up for his absence . My father was adopted . And I’m so thankful he was ♥️
Me too. I didn't know how to act on rare occasions when anyone showed any affection..i was NEVER hugged or told i love u! Never heard my mother say it & when i told my dad once that i loved him his response was.."i know" ! 😂😅😂! Unbelievable! No hugging, or ur amazing, talented, pretty (&i was very pretty once i hit about 17) nothing at all to validate me as a worthy human being..needless to say i had a lot of problems growing up..
"After you've given him a beating, do you feel he's learned something?"
"No."
"Did you learn something?"
"No."
"How angry are you when this happens?"
The whole inteview with the mother is so good, this doctor was amazing...
With the way this is filmed, I would say the 'mother' is played by an actor. Did they use two camera back in the 1960s for tv shows? No, just one. So why and how can a low budget training video afford to have two camera men catching each of their facial expressions going back and forth?
@@LindaPerry_337Idk, the mother and son look a lot alike.
Beautiful but emotionally repressed woman, with an emotionally distant husband. The child wasn't loved because the parents had not been loved themselves. All of them needed help.
You just described African parents
@@belle3055 lol yes! 💯
Some Hispanic aswell
Well said.
Why do you have to say the women was beautiful or not?
The way the child looked at the doctor and said "you love me?!" damn near broke my heart.
Right. The mom was a little distant looking. Never know what happens in private...image doesn't equate to reality all of the time.
That's because he's not getting the love at home just an opinion course I'm in the middle of this will see what they say
what's the timestamp?
@@__enarkive3:17
After 3:10
I'm a step dad to a boy that has aggressive tendencies at school. This video has opened my eyes to many things I didn't know. His dad wasn't there. He craves male companionship so much. But he also needs male kindness and love.
Being a parent is hard, being a step parent is harder. Blessings to you and upon your journey as you try to heal that which you did not hurt and in breaking those cycles.
@@TinnyDee thank you so much!!! We've definitely made a lot of progress. I've definitely noticed that being tender with him and very soft spoken has helped. Him seeing a big man be sweet and kind is not something he is used to. It's opening his eyes to how he can be too if he tries.
I was a step mother to a boy like this. Nothing I said or did made a change. My ex expected me to change the boy. I had a 3 year old,this kid was 6. Never had any consistency in his life. He was aggressive with my child. Yet the boys father never spent time with him or showed genuine affection. It was a living hell.
@@janetsides901 spending time with them and showing genuine affection is the key. I'm sorry that you had to live through this. The task of raising a young boy should have been more on him (the dad) than anything. I'm sorry if this sounds wrong, but it's a man's job to teach his son (or step son) how to be a man.
Have you considered introducing him to martial arts?
Mom was there for him, seeked for help, shared personal info, gave permission to record material other people would be ashamed of, reflected on her feelings and thoughts, and accepted openly criticism. She's brave and worths nothing but recognition -at least half a century later-, keep in mind that therapy was deeply connected with stigma at the time, and still is. She was also experiencing abuse, she deserved a better life but was still caring to save her son's. Even though the mother of "the child" maybe wasn't the most highly educated concerning parening issues, he should feel proud about her and lucky to have her.
Well said!
Father not so much.
I had a little boy at my school, who was overly aggressive and I told him since he was so much bigger he was like one of the teachers, and told him instead of hitting someone, to come to me, and tell me what was going on, and we could come up with ideas on how things could be better. It worked. Also he never wanted to clean up the class, so I would ask him where things went and he helped me put things away.
Nicely done, nicely done.
Great tip!
Brilliant, thank goodness for natural and intelligent teachers like you 😢
Brilliant!
Using brainwashing methods is evil.
Aww, how the child's face lit up when the doctor said he loved him. ❤
I caught that to..That is a telling sign that he doesn't hear that said to him very much I thnk.
The problem right there .. doesn’t feel loved by either parent, acts out negatively to get attention .. poor love ❤
And suddenly there was extended eye contact too...he searched the Dr's face to see if he really meant it!
❤
Another thing is he is receiving punishments. And physical punishments at that but then the poor boy is being rough to others
That doctor was so ahead of his time.
Indeed
Totally yeaps
bazinga Boulogne bullsh💯
@@UNIXSOLJASysadminSyndicate not exactly. People have always had varied opinions but official government PSAs and national ads have convinced (certainly modern Americans) that everyone thought a certain type of way “back then”.
I should also add that slavery has always been controversial throughout cultures and history. The Christian bible described enslaved minorities who fought against it. The evil acts of Christopher Columbus were in defiance of the Catholic Church who told him to stop. This is just one example of how people have always had diverse views and these evil things were never just “normal”.
all the gentlemen seem far more ahead in several aspects then whatever grownups i have to work with
Is it just me or is this doctor fucking awesome? Dude doesn't bullshit at all.
HE IS!!!
Wow, can you imagine a therapist being able to cuddle these days... I trained to be a counsellor for a couple years and that was one of the things I found regretful, that we couldn't even give an adult, some of whom sorely needed human touch, a (brief) hug of sorts. I understand why it's not possible but firmly believe that in some situations it would do a world of good.
do you mean "these days" as in because of Covid? :0 cause if not I surely hope there isnt a rule against hugs for therapists
@@DrFeelGoood no, I mean therapists/ counsellors are not allowed to touch the client in any way covid or not (UK)
@@meelodeshmeeelo2034 this is so sad to hear, that brief hug embrace can change someones week
@@astridparanormalscotland7434 A therapist is trying to get the patient/client to THINK.
True it is sad but nowadays you can be charged with molestation etc.
The moment the therapist said he loved him, something magical happened: He started getting through to the child. The child began to listen and to learn. Amazing.
Teared up watching this. I'm a teacher who teaches kids like this. This boy reminds me of one of my students. He was expelled from a previous school due to his behaviors. Through patience, kindness, encouragement, and genuine affection, I've earned his trust & seen improvements in his behaviors. Never underestimate what genuine love & kindness can do for a child. Often the difficult ones need it the most.
Everyone is placing blame on Mom, but Dad didn’t agree to seek help!
So sad and typical, when it takes a village…
He didn't want to be in the film, you can't know he didn't go privately after
@@lemonstealinghorsdoeuvre they are mentioning this cause this happens a lot in real life as well..a lot of the blame of emotional education is placed on the mother..not always just I see it happen a lot
Yeah - she was consistently beating the child.
"lEtS sOmeHow blAMe tHe mAle !"
Wow Anita, just wow.
@@audas she doesn't suggest blaming the father for anything. Your personal bias came up with that. All she said is there is only one part of the story visible and that everyone tends to be blaming the extremely attractive mom, and for all we know the father could be far worse of an influence. All we know is that the kid is annoying, the mom is hot, and you are easily triggered. Anita applied thought, you applied prejudice.
I have always said “ many parents are the worst bullies to their own kids” it leaves so many emotional scars that many times take a life of healing 😟
Not everyone gets healed!
And sometimes it doesn't go healed
And, for many, it's a healing that never comes.
🤒💯🤕
So true! I've spent a boatload of money on therapy to try to undo my childhood. It's been money well spent. My parents were the worst bullies. I wouldn't treat an enemy the way they treated me and my sisters. Horrific things went on behind closed doors. It is stopping with me, though. The generational trauma ends here.
Too bad I'm too scarred to want children 😂 🙃.
That was very telling when he was worried about getting paint on his hands and said “uh oh, I’m afraid, cause mommy’s gonna give me a hit”. then right after he says “the mother is going after the baby, she’s gonna spank the baby” then says “the father is going to spank the mother, then the mother is going to spank the baby”. A cold household where everyone tries to impose their dominance over the weaker members. No wonder the boy is aggressive. He has to be when the whole family dynamic is based on a power struggle. The weak get spanked. Then submits to the aggressor. That’s how you get what you want. The poor boy didn’t invent that. He learned it from his empathetically bankrupt parents.
No doubt the parents were raised by emotionally bankrupt parents themselves, just as their parents before them. It’s an abusive cycle.
No wonder why the little boy had so much aggression because he was shown that by his mother. Alongside no love and healthy attention
Families often used corporal punishment it was much more common than today. Getting that child help for his behavior probably saved that kid.
@@seeker8097 Yes....
Oh as we live, we learn.
Or supposed to anyway.
My parents were never parented. But they did a decent job considering.
I have found so much compassion for people now.
What a compassionate therapist.
The boy did not make eye contact until the moment the Dr told him he loved him. He is a product of his mother’s resentment and anger.
What about his father? Does he exists at all??
Of course his father is not responsible at all 😂😂😂😂😂
Spectrum of autism 😊
The father is not supporting His wife when she tells the child not do something. He is being an enabler in the child's oppositional defence. He is rearing his son to be sociopathic. And misogynistic.
Anyone who followed this story knows the childs father was an astrount the child has questions
It broke my heart how quickly the boy calmed down when the therapist hugged him…. All he needed was empathy, kindness and patience but his parents and even teachers failed him :(
When he looked at the doctor with excitement and " You love me!?"
Yes
Which annoys me because the mother towards the beginning said "" He has everything he wants and needs "" its a Shame some parents fail to see the very thing the child needs is love, attention, kindness, empathy etc. She sometimes refers to the child as "" IT"" 🥺 hurt adults going on to have hurt children
Yes. They did.
@@robinluich6626 glad you saw that too. How fast he looked at the doctor and asked “you love me?” So hungry for love.
Doctor is teaching the mother that her son needs more physical touch and closeness that all children need.
Exactly. I work with children 0-6 and if I haven't hugged all children at least once during the day I have not done my job.
Willow switch.
Which one?
This is the kind of psychiatrist we need today. Not one, to quickly push meds, to be understood.
Yeah, or trying to change your gender.
Well, if you want that, go to a therapist or a psychologist cause psychiatrists job is to only prescribe medications now
@@MP-mo4ys i don't think any psychiatrist changes a gender or sexuality haha that's usually up to the patient, not the doctor themselves 😅
They can’t do that these days for fear of sexual harassment charges 😢
@@MP-mo4ysu become a female now lol
💙💙💙 when the therapist picked Philip up and rocked him like a baby. {how calm he became}
made me cry tbh
Yea not creepy at all. That's not his father. He's a stranger. Think about it
@@user_abcxyzz sometimes a stranger can give more than family.
@@user_abcxyzzhe is his doctor and the mother is with them.
This poor baby was starving for love and affection.
So if I broke your nose punching you in the face you would think I'm just looking for love and affection? Sometimes I know it's hard for most people to grasp but people give into the monster that is human nature rather than fight it... Even in loving environments this can happen and has
Did u watch the video? Obviously every case is different and what u said is a possibility, but we just watched a 30 minute case study on this child. How can u compare that to ur dumbass walking up and punching someone and argue that anyone would call them similar situations??
@@ThecouncilOf8yes but only if you were in your development years .
@@ThecouncilOf8you told the truth but this is only revealed in adolescence, when puberty arrives that shows that love and affection were in vain
She doesn't realize she is the issue.
this doctor is amazing. he understood right away the real problem is his parents.
That's because 99.9% of the time, when a little kids behaves poorly, it's due to inconsistent parenting & poor boundary setting.
He is/was an angel on earth.
Maybe he discovered how messed up the world is early in life.
Unfortunately, he would be imprisoned our days. He has touched the child!!111!!! Oh, God11!!
It's ALWAYS the parents. That's not rocket science
I just love that little boy's therapist. He is so sensitive, and so helpful for this child. I do hope that these sessions help him so as he grows, he is able to leave this behind.
That little boy is about 61 years old if he is still alive.
Lol
He is in prison now.
@@dawndoliber2663 que eres malo jajaja
@@dawndoliber2663 Running cell block D and has all his bitches in a row so he can punch them for getting ink on their hands, mind you his cell block is the cleanest in the whole prison system.
What helped me the most with raising my children was the book ‘Raising Warriors: Preparing Your Children For a Godly Life’. It is honestly a game changer
Early teaching of real things things works much better than going along with those dangerous religious fantasies. The whole beer on Friday Sports on Saturday church on Sunday never works out.
Who looks at their child and thinks “I’m going to make you into a godly warrior”? What is this, the Taliban?
@@CharlieApples- Don’t bother reading the book. You couldn’t even read the title…
@@CharlieApples Actually worse because it's bigger .
@@CharlieApplesLife is hard. It is a good attitude
This therapist was probably the best dad ever. When he rocked the boy in his arms my heart melted. 🥹
The Doctor turnt out to be a child 💀 PREDATOR
@@RikkiTheFool did he?..how do you know that?
@@loonylinda Ignore that clown
I have worked in early childhood education for 40 years and the look on a child’s face at 4 years old when you say you are a clever kind ,good boy is priceless. It like they have never heard these words before heartbreaking
@@loonylindaignore that comment. Some people just love a reaction. 😵💫
The psychologist was using collaborative problem solving! That's an excellent technique for oppositional and violent children. He was ahead of the time.
I dont think he was ahead of the times, these types of treatments have been coming on way longer than we realise.
I thought he was brilliant - a natural at it.
@@Oysterwang Yea I think so too.
That is an excellent technique for about anything one can think of.
What does collaborative problem solving mean?
The boy was so preoccupied with his toys, while the doctor spoke to him. But when the boy heard the words... "love you", he stopped what he was doing, looked the doctor in the eyes and asked "you love me?".... this poor kid probably never heard anyone say that to him, his whole life. Now we see the root cause of his aggressive behavior.
It’s called fidgeting. Some of us need to have busy hands to focus when someone talks. He was actually paying attention the whole time.
The way his face lit up with the affirmation of love 😭😭😭
He was listening the whole time
His mother referred to him as 'the child'. Very impersonal. I was a child in the 50's/60's and had a very kind & caring mother. We were working class so didn't have much in the way of possessions. Love is free. Myself & most of my close friends were not disciplined in a physical way so had a good childhood. School however showed us a different side to life. Corporal punishment was prevalent. Watching 'rude' children being struck with a leather belt did not help them or those of us that had to watch. The usual recipients ended up getting in trouble with the police or dying young due to taking drugs. A long time ago now but never forgotten. Violence can begat violence. At least it did in our school 😢
@@msch7620Correct, he paid attention the whole time, but it seemed as though he wasn’t, especially when juxtaposed against his reaction to those magical words.
This Dr. way ahead of his time. He understood more than most of his time. He was compassionate and wasn't harsh with the little boy here.
He understands more than those now
That's the normal way to be
@@coppersulphate002 not then it wasnt
To be honest, he understood more than this time even. Adults and parents lack the interest in really understanding the child. They don't realize that what they need is love and affection. Now parents just shove phones, tablets, or TVs in their children's faces to not deal with them. We really haven't progressed, now parents just abuse their children with neglect. Maybe if more parents watched this video, they'd be inspired to help their kids more.
At first I thought the kid was a future serial killer until the dr/therapist said I love you and saw the boys reaction. Poor little guy. Just needed love.
I love their soft low measured way of speaking in this era -much easier to listen too
Things weren't so ghetto.
@@mikeq4917oh! that’s-
When I was a kid grown, people were adults and behaved that way, and this is how people spoke to each other most of the time. By the time I was in my 20s, during the nineties, it had become very difficult to find someone to have a real conversation with. Instead, people mostly would just talk at each other; wait for each other to shut up so that they could say what they wanted to say.
I agree
@@alenamichaelaawhat? True? It is ghetto AF these days. GHETTO GHETTO GHETTTTOOOOOOOOOOOO
When the doctor held him, and was rocking him. Philip was so happy and content. He was feeling love and compassion. Honestly so touching.
he really did calm down after that.
Yup.. The parent was the problem
@@phillippereira6468He felt that the father got the show of warmth and affection , that he craved, She could show it to her husband, but not to her child.
I think this boy wil be a good man, he has to much energy doest know what to do with it. I see these children are sometimes agressieve but that comes that people and other children become always angry at such childeren till now you see they are most atta. by other children or adults who cant handle the way those children act. Then you see someone intelligent and nice comes and take time to talk in a smart way with them or love to play with them you see them become like a totally different child a happy and quit child . You see it when the dr hold him he is just happy and play like most childeren.
Thank you for spelling Philip correctly!
What a surprisingly sweet doctor for the time period, very well educated and gentle but mature approach with the child. Would've loved a doctor to talk to me the way he did, when I was the childs age.
That's some solid training and understanding of psychoanalysis and relational therapy ❤
There's always been sweet doctors that cared and knew what they were doin. (In all medical fields) Problem is they're the exception to the rule. And there has to be the luck of the people needing their particular style of caring and relating actually finding them.
He almost seems like a time-traveler, he's so wise and empathetic.
When I was 11 years old, I was seeing a psychiatrist, had toys, there were other kids there also. I went through all kinds of hearing testing. I recall the doctor and staff all very nice and caring. This would have been about 1963. Of course, I only realized what was going on later in my teens after asking my mother about it. I wasn't an aggressive student as here, but I was acting out in class and under performing in spite having high scores on intelligence test for the time. Turns out it was due to my relationship with my father. He got involved and apparently all worked out for the better.
@@bobbyd6680 That is a super interesting story! Thank you for sharing, and I'm glad it worked out well for you!
"There must be a good reason why you fight all those kids" Such an amazing doc! the best way to help someone with troubled behavior is to be understanding and loving ~
Ngl, Doctor seems pretty awesome. I tend to look back on mental health and behavioral practices from that time period with a bit of horror. But I was pleasantly surprised by this interaction.
Seen The Madman and the Professor? (Just for the odd kind doctor in a 19th century asylum that are usually portrayed as inhumane...). Decency is decency, throughout time
@@briancolwill3071 Sounds interesting. Thanks for the recommendation, sounds right up my alley
@@sarahg2653 oops. I'm back to front. It's the Professor and the Madman. Dunno where you're at with Mel Gibson but I think he's a good actor despite personal difficulties... Creative arts are full of people with problems, sometimes it's tricky. Like, I loathe Polanski personally but I can't boycott his films!
Rotten Tomatoes slayed Professor and the Madman but I found lots to like in it, plenty indeed....
Me too
@@sarahg2653 I set you wrong, it's the Professor and the Madman, but I bet ya got it
His mother seems very cold and detached. When the boy's face lit up and he said "You love me?" You can tell he doesn't hear that word very often.
111%
She probably is tired of dealing with him . Remember depression is real
@@Parisbluesun its more likely that he is like that because she is like that and not the other way around
You cant blame her. The child is psychopath!
My thoughts exactly. He wants to be loved. Gentleness goes a long way.
He needs patience, and hugs.
I am impressed with the professional knowledge and skill of the therapist. He is an excellent orator who explains his points concretely, and all the while engaging the parent in thought-provoking conversation.
Yes, this was very good. It helped me learn.
i agree that. greetings from the Netherlands
That couple should never have had a child. That child is starved of affection - when the doctor said ‘I love you’ his little face lights up. Broke my heart.
“The CHILD.” “The CHILD.” “The CHILD.” “The CHILD.”
You gave THE CHILD a name, MOMMY.
Evidence of emotional distance
She's highly stressed and in an unfamiliar situation - and this is also a much different time to the one we live in.
The child is better
Thats what they called them in those days
I was the child until i was 4 and they knew i was gonna be around a while
It is so clear to see where that child’s anger comes from, the mother is so angry herself.
Psychiatry is a pseudoscience
Shocking insight... We watched the video too.
On psych meds
Isn’t this the 60s? Back when they started medicating women and telling them their work in the home was of less value than outside the home? Obviously medicated women was just a fraction of the amount of women that are medicated today. But the medication’s just create a false sense of control, they don’t actually make things better, so often people who lash out in extreme ways, seemed like zombies on their medication’s, but their opinions and deeply rooted issues were never altered, just temporarily suppressed. Don’t forget her father was probably a World War II soldier and this was also during the time when people pulled away from the morals of the church at home and school and experimented with everything. They look proper, but is that just facade?
actually you're completely wrong the kid isn't acting up because the mother is angry at herself, no, according to the video the mother is angry at herself because the kid is acting up it's the exact opposite, if you paid a little bit of attention you wouldn't have typed this useless comment
She never refers to him by his first name. It's always this child or the child. Speaks volumes.
My mother is an early childhood teacher. In behavioural reports that go to parents I’ve seen that they use Initials or ‘the other child’ or ‘Other’ for safety reasons - protecting that child from identification by strangers - an example was a choking incident like the video, the mother of the choked child was extremely protective and threatened to sue (can’t sue in New Zealand) the parents of the child when they found out who they were. To avoid the whole mess and others like it, my mother used fake initials, ZT, to which the mother was looking on the birthday wall for the initials. Her plan apparently was to find the child, wait with them, and threaten the parents. Nut jobs are why nut rules are in nut place.
@@geminiwriter8875 this child's name is all over the video. But it's the mother who never uses it.
@@kathyhayevsky4703 this is the 1960s, I was giving you a modern option and showing parents went from undercaring to overbearing.
@@geminiwriter8875 Yup Licensed k-12/special ed teacher k- 8 over here. Written a fair share of IEP's. Parenting/environment is huge on the development of a child....fu**ing obviously...but, neurology/brain structure is a large part of "dysfunction"/(abnormalities as well), too.
Pardon poor grammar, as I am talking to text on the go..., obviously.
I will say that in homacidal cases especially, when the *past tense* is used/not the names etc, that is a red flag for sure, as mentioned.
@@natalie9884 well, the kid its aggro because his mother beat the sht up of him everytime he behaves like a child, he is just mimicking his own experience
The way he was surprised to hear someone say "I love you!"
I feel like his mother deep down cares. I mean she agreed to seek help. That’s a start. I see her smiling as she was watching her son play. Parenting is not easy. I hope she got the help she and her son need. And hopefully her marriage as well.
I'd argue the evidence you give supports the idea of the mother caring about her appearance. When she was smiling, it looked like relief that the kid saw the parents as loving and showed people that. Did she care? I think so. Was she more selfish than caring? I can definitely see it being possible. Was she more focused on herself when she was under stress? After the kids description of the birds he painted, I'd say likely. Is there a second appearance of the blobfish? Yep 25:54
@@lemonstealinghorsdoeuvre Selfish or not selfish, self focused or self conscious, what matters is that the channel she has with the child works such as providing love, assertive communication, limits, etc.
@@helenacorreia7613 agreed
She was probably treated the same way by her parents. Very sad.
Every child is an individual.
It was an era when children were corrected.
It dawned on me that the mom says the dad is European. This is 1960. Which means this precious little boy had one parent coping with the trauma of growing up during WWII. My husband's grandmother lived through the Battle of Berlin. My mother in law was raised in a very abusive, emotionally cold, distant, household. A traumatic household in its own way because of what her mother lived through and never got help for. I just imagine that must have played at least some significant role. Never underestimate generational trauma.
Well, that would be all of my great grandparents and grandparents. My grandmother was evacuated from London during the Blitz. My grandad was in the Royal Navy. They weren’t cold and horrible!
@@pommiebearsit depends on the people but generally speaking, times were insane and abuse pretty normalized, sadly. It's a whole generational trauma thing.
Philima, I tend to consider it depended on the family. Different families , different stories.
@@pommiebears I didn't speak for all of the survivors of WWII. My grandparents were in the USA, were well off in adulthood and my maternal grandmother had 6 kids that raised themselves essentially because her career and social life came first. She was just selfish, no trauma.
Some people who go through actual warfare trauma might become emotionally stunted at the age they were damaged, thus having Children of their own... They're unable to connect to them in a mature, nurturing manner you'd expect from a stable adult.
@@philima Right! You didn't have the widespread understanding of trauma and abuse we have today. Your average person didn't get therapy. So trauma and abuse got passed on, sadly.
Sitting in her Kindergarten class with a smoke in hand......Classic😂
It was so normal back in the day 😂. She wasn’t tryna hide it either it’s so funny and weird how Normal it was back in the day . Knowing she could smoke at work is crazy
I used to work at Trader Joe’s and my boss told me about how the checkout all used to have burn marks on them from employees placing their cigarettes down to bag the groceries (back in the day) 😂. Times have sure changed!
Oh yes, vaping is so much more healthy & lovely.
@@stephenpmurphy591 Vaping wouldn't be allowed in Kindergarten either.
@@stephenpmurphy591не курите всякую дрянь.
I notice in the comments people saying "We grew up under these and we ended up ok", but honestly, no I don't think you did. The children of the 60's have many many issues that they passed on to their children.
We owned our own preschool for 45 years. Each child was given a warm hug when entering their classroom each morning. Hugs were always welcome throughout the day.
that sounds so lovely! You aren't even allowed to comfort a hurt child today - it is heartbreaking.
why on earth wouldnt you be allowed to comfort a hurt child today?@@SerenDipity64711
@@SerenDipity64711at my kids' school they are absolutely allowed to comfort them. it's a small private school though. My oldest just started public school so I'm not sure of the difference yet. I'm sure they are allowed to offer some comfort. Maybe not physical (I'm not sure) but definitely with words.
Today the child enters, the teachers not even greeting.
are you in the UK? A friend of mine who ran a nursery for 40 years, told me recently how things used to be.They could kiss children's knees better, if they had a fall
but not anymore! If a child needs a plaster put on, they have to phone a parent for permission!@@DSDaly
People are saying the mom is closed and cold. Buts she’s open and honest and she’s willing to participate in all of this. Such a good episode. I think she just didn’t know better.
That's a really good way of seeing things and I'm glad you pointed this out.
I agree, she was trying and trying to learn to correct behaviors. Not one sign of the dad trying here.
Well, here's what's going on and it happens today,
It's domestic violence, the father is beating the wife. The child is showing that the alligator is his father, he's showing how dad loves on mom but turns into a beast. The child wants love from the father ...the doctor is what the child wants because he affectionate, the mother is angry at the father and taking it out on the child because she sees the father in the boy.
She’s very vulnerable. And clearly never felt safe herself as a child.
@@SpicyGramCracker
That child is going to grow up beating on his own wife. The father is not present in this scenario, where's the father?? He's absent.
This is a good example of why children need a loving FATHER in the home. If we can recognize domestic violence, we can stop the cycle of it. BUT the cycle continues til this day.
When a child gets labeled as “trouble” how he is treated by adults changes. He’s “trouble” and it follows him everywhere. Sad because children need LOVE. Love cures a lot! ❤❤
It’s the labeling!!!!
The way a child called "trouble", the relationship between his parents could be called the same... A "trouble".
That's mirroring and children do for many years in early developments try to be what their parents let him know about who they are reflect positively and child developed a healthier self images of their own existence
These two doctors did a marvelous job unpacking the story for this poor kid. The way he melted into the arms of that gentle psychiatrist 😢. They were just in time.
"Daddy hits the mummy, and then mummy hits the baby"... Ouch, my heart! 💔
😥 yes
@marilyncantrell4954, and then the baby grows up, and the cycle repeats itself.😮
PAIN
He needs to be loved ❤ Everything that he needed is unconditional love.
No such thing as unconditional love.
The therapist is very good. I don’t think the mother really enjoys being a mother which is at the root of his misbehavior. His misbehavior functions as a way to keep his mother involved with him.
Mother is focused on herself: "there's something that makes you feel like a failure." Bad behavior may be an attempt to get mother to focus on the child.
And what about the father ?
@@shelleyoxenhorn833 well, if it were the only "project" in your life and it failed, you would feel similar as her. and if on top of that she had inferiority complex, than it makes even more sense.
@@shelleyoxenhorn833 I know it's easy to look down upon her but has anything changed today? Mothers are still under enormous pressure and I know a lot of them who routinely ask themselves those self-centered questions of "Do people think I'm a bad mother and a failure?" despite having their kids best interest at heart. It's hard to shun other people's opinions when it comes to emotionally loaded topics of family and raising children.
Well it shouldn't be her burden. Where is the father?
This dr and all involved with helping are outstanding spot on . Such love , patience and smarts
I just love how wonderful this man sounds. He's so sweet and smart.
All that little boy needs is someone to hug him and tell him they love him.The way he reacted when the the therapist said he loved him.smh he acted surprised that anyone could love him.The problem Was the parents not the child
I imagine no one ever said that to him...I feel so sorry
Finally someone says "parents" not mother only!
And the way he calmed down after being held…
I have no idea how this was recommended to me but I’m glad it was. Very interesting.
One of the best templates for raising kids:
If a child lives with criticism, he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility, he learns to fight.
If a child lives with ridicule, he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with shame, he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with tolerance, he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement, he learns
confidence.
If a child lives with praise, he learns to appreciate.
If a child lives with fairness, he learns justice.
If a child lives with security, he learns to have faith.
If a child lives with approval, he learns to like himself.
If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, he
learns to find love in the world.
Agree.
If I had to bet on who has that brat figured, I would bet on you! How did this 1960's story end? Serial killer?
Needs to lose a fight... that's all. This is normal boy behavior to an extent.
What’s the difference between ridicule and shame?
This is all common knowledge but everyone is different. This isnt accurate all the time.
That poor mum is so angry. She is fearful, defensive, and dominance-oriented. And the child reflects and amplifies those feelings.
Heartbreaking to hear the parents would punish him for feeling sad, when he is only feeling sad because the parents are fighting
You can tell the Mother was raised in a very strict family, poor woman is lost. I’m happy to hear her admit that what she’s doing doesn’t work.
The type of woman that shouldn't have reproduced, but at least her offspring was used as a lab rat so that we could acquire knowledge
You can tell she's a single mother.
@@faustopacheco120 she isn't single mother, it's common situation where parent don't know how to raise a child becauce they are busy
@@gamesahsv862true. Even they lie to itself...
She seems like a stereotypical WASP
His face when he said, "you love me?" OMG 😮😥😥😥🙏🙏
The lightning moment
If I was that therapist I would have taken him home immediately 🥺
I just want to give him a big hug.
I struck seeing his action. He wanted to be loved.
Where is this part
This kid just needs to hear the words said to him" I love you ".
This doctor is incredibly patient and kind. I wish I’d known of him while he was alive.
Indeed. It's trickle down. The husband beats the wife. The wife beats the child. And then child will mess up their kids if he has any. My mom is very stand-offish too. Doesn't even like to be touched. At all. I can't remember the last time I got a hug from her. Usually around once a year, if I'm lucky. Fortunately, my dad is more affectionate. Of course, he had a messed up childhood too. His mom would go to restaurants and eat in front of him while she made him stand outside and watch her eat. Good times...
@@williamyoung9401 "Grandma, were you f..ked by your dad one day? No? Then who planted such a beach in you, I wonder?"
"They punish me for feeling sad for them" 😢 wow such a deep emotional understanding
Heartbreaking 😢💔😢
This doctor is so kind and affectionate; so gentle with this angry little boy. This was so touching. It’s clear Phillip is missing out on basic affection and gentle loving and tender care. So sad!
That wa very disturbing. That guy was way to close ti that little boy. He's definitely a perv.
@@michaelfornell4467 Did you miss the entire point of the video?? The child was missing affection so he addressed that issue perfectly and helped him. I hope you don't have any children because they will turn out just like Philippe. A man showing affection to a child is perverted??? You're an imbecile.
@@michaelfornell4467why is hugging and holding a young child inherently sexual? He didn’t have a healthy experience of parental love, so it seems like the psych was trying to show by example what love feels like. children NEED to be held and loved for neurological development.
He gets paid to be gentle and affectionate it’s part of the manipulative. Actions with the doctor is taking.
Please don’t make sexual jokes or advances or swear God wouldn’t like that and there are children here May God bless you and your family and help you Give your life to Jesus Christ and repent. I pray that God will lead on the path to Jesus Christ and send the Holy Spirit to be your helper. I pray this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ I pray Amen! Jesus Christ loves you. Give your life to Jesus Christ and ask for forgiveness for ALL OF YOUR SINS. Even the ones committed in the past and repent. He’s coming soon. Please pray and repent. GOD IS ALPHA AND OMEGA!!! THE BEGINNING AND THE END!!! GOD SENT HIS SON DOWN TO DIE ON THE CROSS FOR OUR SINS. PLEASE GIVE YOUR LIFE TO HIM!!! PRAY AND REPENT AND GOD IS COMING!!!!!! THERE IS NO TIME. FELLOW CHRISTIANS GOD WILL BE COMING DON’T LOSE FAITH!!! PLEASE!! PRAY FOR STRENGTH AND DON’T DOUBT HIM!!!
Romans 10:9 “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.”
Romans 10:10 “For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.”
2 Peter 3:1-18 “1 This second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in both which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance:
2 That ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour:
3 Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts,
4 And saying, Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation.
5 For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water:
6 Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished:
7 But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men.
8 But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.
9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.
11 Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness,
12 Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat?
13 Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth
righteousness.
14 Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless.
15 And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you;
16 As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction.
17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness.
18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.”
concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.
11 Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness,
12 Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat?
13 Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth
righteousness.
14 Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless.
15 And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you;
16 As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction.
17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness. GOD JESUS CHRIST AND THE HY SPIRIT IS ALPHA AND OMEGA!!
18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.” GOD, JESUS CHRIST, AND THE HOLY SPIRIT IS ALPHA AND OMEGA.l
02:52 THERES THE PROBLEM!!! Doc says so himself: you had whippings and punishments...no wonder he's like that! Agression is the only method he knows and he got it from his parents!!!
That therapist was absolutely amazing. I hope Phillip grew up to have a good life ❤
That's what I'm wondering, how he is now , I mean I respect their privacy but I'd love good news
@@shawnaclarkson9401 same! he is probably out there living his life, and even the mother could be still.
He sat waaay too close.
@@shawnaclarkson9401 Me murdered his mother in 1975.
@@bobbyd6680 what?! No way! How did you find this out? Or are you joking?
Look how that little boys aggression melted once he got a hug and told he was loved .. the mother also recognised where she was going wrong and got the help she needed 👏🏾
Its not just a hug but a hug from a Man. He wants Real attention from his Father, not just the dismissive attention he gets by quickly getting his way.
@@deenad3562 Take your blinders off. This wasn't all about the boys father, in fact as a primary caregiver his relationship with his mother was likely more important at that moment.
@@delishme2Nobody said it was ALL ABOUT THE FATHER. SMH
@@theresawolford9000 Are you mentally challenged ? Read the comment above mine. 🙄
And sedation lol...
These pioneers in child psychology should be commended.
This video is really hitting home today as I'm struggling with my two boys. I hope I can bring the calm & comfort that the Dr. did. ❤
This doctor is brilliant for today as much as 1960.
That's a sad at stupid reply as the father was clearly molesting the child , Duh.
@kronos4eva what makes you think He was molested?
This therapist is so amazing, especially for the 60s. He's so sweet with "the child". The mother was just like my mother. No love, no affection, only screaming and abuse. I thought every family was like this 😢
Sorry to hear that you felt unloved. My folks were a bit like that too, no hugs ever. They were good parents in other ways but lacking in affection. Even now at 82 years old if try to hug them they tense up and get embarrassed. Grandparents were the same. I mean I knew they loved us kids, but they just never said it or showed it. I remember one day my Aunt (not a blood relative) hugged me for some reason. I kinda just froze and thought "this is weird" but maybe that was because I never really liked her that much. Anyway, I try to do better with my daughters because I realise now how important it is for kids to know they are loved.
I don’t know. I have to say the therapist kind of creeped me out. He kept invading the boy’s personal space and getting way too close. I think the boy probably suffered from ADHD.
Similar , in a way, but we can't blame them as they didn't have when they were babies!
I thought that's the way they spoke at the time. I actually thought the mother was a good mother for seeking help and taking advice so well. The therapist is brilliant, I wonder who he was.
@@ZosiaSamosiaOo
Actors, I’m thinking.
This was me. I was very similar to Phillip. My parents didn't change, however. I found the love I needed from other caretakers. Babysitters, tutors, teachers, psychiatrists. I knew that I couldn't be all bad if at least some people who knew me well loved me.
It wasn't that they didn't love you, they didn't understand you and felt like failures. People who feel like failures but lack coping skills often behave aggressively and/or distant from the child because they feel helpless. And helpless people develop apathy.
Sounds familiar. I was the black sheep and my mother seemed to not like me. As you say, if other people liked me I figured it must be my mom who had the problem. Still painful though.
@@SKYCHICK__good insight. Thanks!
Thank you for sharing that. I am the warmth and love for my grandson. My daughter, his mother, is cold like this. He has no father around at all. I often wonder if all of the affection and care I give him will be enough. Your comment gives me hope.
Good for you, I was taken from my destructive mother at the age of 8 and instantly put on medication the minute she left the hospital, been passed around my whole life since then, never attached to anyone. I'm turning 28 this year never worked & have no friends I did try for the past years and clawed my way threw my trauma with the help of social workers. Became more stable and able to live on my own for about a year now. Sadly I see no way of ever being a productive part in this society. At least I'm not bothering anyone and manage somehow. can't say the same about my siblings. People shouldn't be allowed to have children without a license IMO.
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1, TNIV)
Yup. And also do not provoke your children…… ❤
@@abigailandino6251 Which one?
As old as this is it's spot on. This kid wanted affection between his parents instead of the father abusing his mother and in turn for himself. He was denied this and so acted out in frustration and attention seeking. I hope he and his parents got on the right path though I suspect divorce was imminent.
Exactly how i feel !
Nah. I reckon you were right about divorce and I bet he continued to become an even bigger arsehole. His behaviour was established and so was the parents. I've seen boys like this.
When i saw the mother's dead eyes and the father's lack of presence i knew he was an abuser. By the end of the film it was confirmed.
The mom and child could have stood a chance emotionally on their own, but back then most women stayed married to their abusers. With his money and power she didnt stand a chance in those times.. even today the rich abusers almost always get their way.
I hope the mom can stop the cycle, but with "father" running interference and putting down/disrespecting the mom, poor kid probably grew up abusing as well unless this treatment really made a strong impression and continued for years.
Divorce... what a perfect word, lol. I also thought that. My parents are like this too, the only difference is that they practically played me. Before they hated the sh*t out of each other, then they came back together and I was on the verge of killing. I'm STILL on the verge of killing. So, to this day, I still hurt myself when frustation becomes too much to handle. If I hadn't a brother, I wouldn't have ANYTHING to leave behind in that f*cking house. I'm so sad for him. I can't help him, since I'm a toxic person myself.
@@vespiqueen1984 I think you're not like this
The "you love me?" Broke my heart. 😭
😭 Me too, honey :(
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Poor thing. Hope he found the love he needed. He stopped what he was doing and questioned the doctor. Sad moment
HEARTBREAKING 💔 I HOPE HE GOT ALL THE LOVE HE DESERVES 🌻
A fine, patient Doctor, sure to have helped a lot of people in his career.
I can relate with this boy. Only child, alcoholic workaholic mom, depressed father with unregular income. My mom was the breadwinner therefore tired and hungover and doesn’t have time for me.
The doctor almost seems like a time-traveler, he's so wise and empathetic for the time. Obviously not everyone from that time were cold or backwards thinking, but it's kind of striking to see in an informative video like this.
I know right?! Most doctors would’ve immediately put that boy in a psyche hospital and have him take a handful of meds to put him in a zombie state. Just like JFK’s sister Rosemary who was put away and had a lobotomy done
I really don't think most therapists, pychiatrist, etc. were all that different. I believe it is most people now who have a warped view of history. This is because what we hear about the practices of the past are mostly accounts of extreme cases. Granted there were some widespread issues, especially with institutiinalization; however, working in the mental health field for the last 15 years, I am not convinced that the current practices are substantial improvements. Many continue to be institutionalized, it has just taken a different form, one with broader implications and harm to communities. I am not advocating going back, mind you, just that the field has not made the progress many seem to believe it has.
@@TheJohmac my fathers youngest brother was “put away” in a psychiatric hospital because he was out of control. My fathers family didn’t want to be “associated” with him or have others know that their son was mentally ill. He was in there in the mid 1960’s. They were well known in their community and couldn’t have a child who was “different” and rarely ever visited him. I met him once when I was about 5 years old and remember seeing him sitting in a chair just staring at the wall. My father tried talking to him and he wouldn’t respond. The visit was maybe 5 to 10 minutes until my father said, “Let’s go, I don’t know why I even bothered to see him anyways.” I was confused what was going on and asked my father if, “ everything was okay?” He said, “Yes, everything is fine, don’t worry, we won’t ever come here again.” I couldn’t ask him who that man was until many years later because he would get so upset every time I would bring it up. I never saw him again and learned that he died in there a few years later. It has always bothered me how my grandparents just got rid of him because they didn’t want to be embarrassed.
Doctors now are less empathetic
We are much more cold now than back than
22:36 I grew up in a household typical of the 1960's. My mother was a housewife and didnt work, and my father left the house at 615am before my brother and I were up for school. Then he would return at 730-745 pm and we had already eaten and were getting ready for bed. So my fether was pretty absent, although he was present, my parents were married 50 years. My father did not show much affection to us kids at all. My mother did as much as a mother was supposed to but even she did not show much more affection than that was required. Now I am 60 and I have two boys and always showed physical affection toward them. I believe it was because of the times and generation we were brought up in. I dont remember seeing lots of affection even in my close friends households in the 60's. It was more about raising your children to be polite and respectful of their parents back then. Although with the love and affection I provided to my boys, they were very polite and respectful too. I think they wanted to please their father and I even more. I guess what Im trying to point out is that everyone feels better when they are loved!
❤
At 65 I hear you. I was like that child myself. I've done well in life. Bless this good doctor.
My mom said i was loved by her when i was 52 years old. How different my life would have been if i knew it 40 years ago?. Now as a mothef myself, i realize she did love me always ❤️ Very simple medicine
Everyone feels better when they are loved - what a wonderful line!♥️❤️♥️❤️♥️
that poor baby. his face when "you love me?!"
This man was ahead of his time
This child lives in an abusive home and is admitting all the physical and emotional abuse happening
And it STILL isn’t illegal in the USA. Crazy. Glad my country banned this in the 70s
This poor kid lit up like a Christmas tree when the doctor said he loved him, and the lad even asked joyfully, “You love me?!” I think this poor kid didn’t feel loved by his parents, and when he rationalized why not, he obviously told himself it was because a bad kid and decided he was on his own.
Yeah, when he later says his mum would hit him when he feels bad for her after her husband hit her explains a lot. He was on his own, anything he did he must have been afraid he will be abused for.
@@moos5221Lol My parents were exactly the same in the 2000s (father beats mother -> mother beats children). I don't think lil dude was afraid to be abused but probs was always told he's bad so it becomes like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Why even try when no one recognizes the little positive things anyways?
It would be great to have a follow up from the 'little boy' as to how life turned out and what he can remember about those times.
He grew up to be Joe Biden
He grew up to be Ned Flanders
He grew up to be Elon Musk
He grew up to be Ghengis Khan
He grew up to be Donald Trump.
The mother obviously had absolutely no true sympathy, empathy, or even fond thought about her own son.
Her eyes, the stillness of her facial movement(s); She is numb to him.
You could hear his pain when he asked, do you love me.
My heart breaks for him and is thankful the doctor gave him the love he deserves. Even if only for a short time.
We all just need to be loved
"Cause I'm afraid, my mother's gonna give me a hit." "mummy spanks the baby? How does the baby feel?" *He makes a crying noise* "Who fights in your family?" "Mama and Papa" "And what do you feel like when they have an argument?"
"I feel like I'm sad"
@ 3:18 "You love me?" That innocent little face...my heart absolutely sank 🥺💔
It's obvious that what he's lacking is affection, and protection. Wrap your arms lovingly around your children, they are the most precious jewels you will ever have.
that kid is just smart enough to understand that his parents do not love him.
The mother reminds me of the woman who raised me...a very well spoken, stylish woman and behind closed door a psychopathic tyrrant
just like my ex
Same
💯
NO WIRE HANGERSSSSSSS !!!
Same here! So manipulative that made every one believe she was a saint and we were bad children
When he said "he's dead" about the alligator I felt a tear in my eye. He just needed to know he was loved. Nothing is more important.
😢 I felt that in so many ways
I went my whole life not being told I was loved.
At age 50, I finally asked my mother. Her response was,”Well, you know I can’t talk about these things….”
She just couldn’t say it or show it.
Something awful.
The way one speaks to a child, becomes their inner voice.
Very profound observation. I never thought of that.
Wow!
That's so very true ....It took me decades to realise that it was my mother's voice in my head, always disapproving of me.
His parents are emotionally cold and rife with denial. She never refers to him by name, rather as “the child”. The source of his issues are quite apparent.
His mother is emotionally distant from her child, so he fights other kids and disobeys authority to get attention since he's getting little from his parents. Hence, the curious interest on his face when he asks the doctor, "do you love me?"
That is what they want you to believe . ..that was the faulty idea of psychology at that time ...but I'm sure she feels on gaurd with all these men . Her child is special needs .
@@jillianlea9690I can't make sense of your comment.
His little face when he asked if the therapist loved him. 💔😥💔 He clearly was not getting his emotional needs met at home. His mother is cold as ice.
@@VioletJoybecause her husband was unsupportive and boys are more difficult. Stop blaming women.
@@19katsandcounting It's simply not true that boys are more difficult. He wasn't getting his needs met from either parent. Your bias toward women is showing. This is about the child, not the mother being a victim.
So heartbreaking, its not the boy that has the problem, he is reacting to his abusive parents. Hope they got the help they needed. If he lives today he is over 60.
Exactly
When the doctor asked “who do you think is the most important person to him?” I cried. Children really just want love from their most important person.
This ended with the mother and father are fighting all the time. Domestic violence. This 1960s family is involved in domestic violence and it's rubbing off on the children. This problem in 1960 is no different that now domestic violence and children in the middle
@@MD-gw4rkyup it’s DV mixed with ADHD. You can see the ticks he has all throughout the video. The PTSD is him trying to have control whenever something is overwhelming, especially if there’s shouting and yelling. Fight, flight or freeze happens when you are triggered while you have PTSD.
@@Krazycougar22
I don't think they are simulating that. It's domestic violence. Children that young are being taught at such an early age, as young as that child, to grow up beating thier own spouse. If parents showed love, affection, and disapline without screaming at your children, they will grow up healthy and happy. Set boundaries with your children. If they do wrong, correct them, but after you correct them, explain WHY they're doing wrong. Be consistent with your children. Parents NEED to stop trying to override each others type of disapline. Be consistent with them.
@@Krazycougar22
It's not hyper active disorder, the child is playing out his father's behavior by using the alligator as the beast represents his father's abusive nature. He acting up because he is seeing his mother get beat up ...she turns around and takes it out on the kid. he's weaker than the mother, so she will hit him too. Children are naturally hyper active. It's not a "disorder". I don't believe in hyperactive disorder. Children are hyper. They need stimuli, they need attention from the parents who raise them. Not drugged up and act like zombies.
@@Krazycougar22Another diagnostician rather than a rational analysis. Doping some kid up on drugs will ruin his life, you realize Ritalin is pretty much the same thing as methamphetamine right?
The way he was surprised and actually looked at the Doctor when he told him he loves him.