How I Got Clean and Sober Before my RV Life
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ต.ค. 2022
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Congrats, on 14 years, sober.
You are an amazing person, I enjoy your vlogs more each year. You are so generous in spirit to share this struggle and success, true kindness. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your story Carolyn. Congratulations on your sobriety. Sadie is such a beautiful dog. Happy travels and glad you found peace and contentment. I hope to see you on the road one day. ✌🏼❤️🤗
What a great story Carolyn did they use the word “fine”!!I still use that. I don’t know if I can say what the acronym stands for. Meth Monsters extroverts drink so much My Dads drinking helped me
So much I
So
Relate
So
Much thank. You for sharing this I so get AA. It’s funny at times but does not progress enough for me. Bless them for what they do. But god forbid you used drugs as your not welcome in AA. No no. You made so much sense. Thank you oh you really nailed this with the therapist. We have to get to the core. It is so painful. I was not able to cry without drinking or drugs. It was a very painful experience. Denial is dangerous. I was a pro at this. I would not want to live those years again but thankful for making it through You are so strong Carolyn. What you went through is amazing and you look so darn good. I like this Carolyn. Yahoo ! Proud of you. Wow. We are better people for going through this ❤❤
Good job! Another author to read is Gabor Mate. A doctor who also writes lots of books about the association of what women experience in our lives and the associations we make in our brains that cause us to hide ourselves because of whatever debilitating pains we've endured, most often unknowingly. Addiction and AA and all that crazy is just that. Awareness is a good word . Meditation is also very helpful. Extremely helpful. Bless you with Love, Strength, and to Be You!
I cannot tell you how much I respect your courage for laying out what you went through. Giving your therapist credit is admirable but I did not hear you give yourself enough credit for your strengths your courage and your determination. Digging down into your soul was your doing Carolyn. You could have thrown up your hands anytime and walked away. You could have felt you didn't need to open wounds you thought were healed or you could have negotiated within yourself to go halfway sober and halfway something else of your choice. But you did none of those things. You chose to stand up brush yourself off go forward and create a healthier well focused and beautiful new you. Even in your darkest hours something within you new all along you were better than anybody vodka or wine or pills. So congratulations you are one pretty terrific lady
Victoria. you sound like my therapist.. and that's a huge compliment. thank you for this very kind and compassionate message. You brought a tear to my eye.. Yes, I think you're right I forget that I did the hard work to get here sometimes. So thank you for the reminder. Big hug of gratitude to you!
Amen, Victoria!! She had the courage and the fortitude!!🙂
Well said.
I believe Victoria said it well, and succinctly.
Wow, it takes alot of courage to tell this story. Its a struggle alot of people deal with silently...
Yes and I get so many emails about this. So I hope that telling my story can help others who are struggling..
I'm sober 32 years. Cold turkey, AA didn't work for me. I'm introverted and having to speak to people gave me panic attacks. I read the same book as Carolyn. Now I just think I just can't have alcohol, like someone that is allergic to strawberries and get a reaction.
Is "How to Quit Drinking Without AA" the book you're talking about? I'm only halfway through the video, and Carolyn brings up the book but doesn't say the name of it.
@@Just_A_Glo, yes that is the name of the book. The link is in Carolyn's description.
35 years sober here. AA worked for me, however, we are all on our own journey. What works for me may not work for others. I learned along to ago to not take anyones inventory. I am very happy that you are clean and sober. You go girl!!! 😘😘
Carolyn when you said what finally got you sober , it made my cry, because you were willing to finally see the awful things that happened to you as a child, just as I must do now. I have been trying to get sober for a very long time (without AA), and I have not been able to do it because it is so terrifying to feel how helpless I was as a child, having to endure all these awful things. It makes so much sense to me to know that the reason why I drink is because even at 67, I am still trying to cope with it all. You have given me some hope and some facts to enable me to understand why I drink. I have always been afraid to look at my childhood or talk about it because I feel it will just overwhelm me. I feel like I can maybe move forward with sobriety now. I do have a therapist I Zoom with weekly, but I avoid talking about my traumatic childhood with her. Perhaps in bits and pieces I can start to "see it and look at it now" ,and see it as it was back then when I was little, and how that trauma has had lasting effects on me most of my life..
Thank You
You can do it. Don't give that power to what happened to you as a child control your adult life. No more secrets.
Get help and let it all out.
I met a lady in AA that came in scared, I held her hand because I could see she was afraid when it was nearing her turn to speak. I told her if she's not ready just pass. We became best friends and have been best friends, and sober 38 yrs. Didn't stay in AA all that time but, lived 1 day at a time and that part of it got us where we are today..
I'm 72 and whatever forces brought us together, I am so grateful. I don't think long term , I just stay sober today .
I'm still here.
Wish you the very best, enjoy the sober train 1 day at a time. ❤️ Meant for Melanie.
I drank excessively to help manage my ability to take care of my wife with advanced dementia.
It put me in the ER with gall and liver issues.
I quit drinking anything. Tough adjustment. Now I take care of her at home still. Tough job, but easier without drinking as it turns out.
When she passes, I have a van I've been building. I plan to travel to the furthest boondocking spots I can find.
Thank you for your story, your honesty, but most of all, your courage to tell it
I appreciate that
❤
I quit drinking cold turkey over 20 years ago, best thing I ever did.
You are so amazing. Thank you for trusting us with this journey. You have my respect and admiration. THANK YOU! It resonated on several levels. I have saved this video and will re-watch it.
Thank you so much!
❤
Thank you Carolyn for your courage to tell your story. Congrats on almost 14 years. This month marks my 33 rd year of sobriety. 25 years of those in A.A. I wanted to stay sober but not in A.A years before but the fear of going back out if I stopped going to meetings was repeatedly re-inforced so I stayed. I am grateful that I had a foundation that gave me a better way to live however no one could help me with my depression and true feelings of agony due to early child abuse in foster care. I was told to stay on message to encourage newcomers. I was told to repeat steps when my demons plagued me. Nothing helped. I was sober but alone in A.A. I felt I was surrounded by people who ostracized me for speaking out about my pain. I did go to many therapists however some could not deal with the complexity of my past. I'm so glad you shared your honest feelings. I'm sober and still have my walls up. I may give Jungian analysis a go as it suits my nature. I don't know if I can ever trust people again as so many even in my own family have hurt me deeply. Being a childless woman has also isolated me further. But one thing I will never ever give up on is myself. The thing I have done is faced everything within me and come out the other side of pain. It would have been better with a good therapist. Still loving life though and being a nomad. Take care and thank you again. People need to know not to be brainwashed but think for themselves. Also it was a therapist who I saw for a short while in my 25th sober year in A.A. who I spoke to about wanting to leave A.A. I was afraid and she told me that I was the one who had stopped drinking and could keep making that decision with or without A.A and she was right. All the constant reiterating my powerless just reinforced my weakness and shame and leaving A.A I still did not drink like everyone warned me. I love being conscious too Carolyn. Its the best high there is. Especially dogs and nature.
I quit when my little 8 year old girl needed a real dad. There is no one size fits all. As you said, AA has helped people, but, I know a number of people who failed. Your story might help others. My daughter is now 28, married and I have grand kids to keep me going. There is always a way, if one thing don`t work try another. Thank you for your story.
Carolyn you are one heck of a woman. Thank you for being so real. I am proud of you.
Humility and humiliation ring the same. You can be a good person who does not have an overblown ego without all the shit talk to yourself or by others. Proud of you for taking yourself in hand and solving the problem. Awesome job.
The 12 steps don't work for everybody. I'm so glad you had the guts to share your story, and show that with or without AA recovery is possible.
So happy for you! Agree, once you heal your trauma, staying sober is easy as you no longer need the vices. I'm 30 years drug free, 6 years alcohol free and 18 months cigarette free. I'm now a mental heal advocate and help others heal. Being sober, loving yourself and living authentically allows us to see the beauty and wonder in this world. You're living your best life now, love it!!!
Thanks for sharing your story. That sure makes you vulnerable but will undoubtedly help someone. My adult son started drinking on his 21st birthday and didn’t stop until he had multiple black outs, 2 DUIs, lost jobs etc… all before 23yo. he didn’t want to stop. He wanted to hide behind it. It wasn’t until he was court ordered to go to AA… and slowly got sober. He has been sober for over 10 years. He could benefit from some serious counseling- but he’s sober and I’m proud of him.
Wow! My Husband and I just talked about quitting drinking. Then he said " lets wait until Monday" I'm getting the book today. Thank you for your story.
God bless you Carolyn for sharing your story. Your audience is so tremendously larger than any one meeting. There's no estimating how many people you may have touched and given guidance and direction. I truly appreciate hearing your story. My son is 45 and just finally made the decision that he didn't want to live like that anymore about a year and a half ago. He says he was given his first drugs at the age of 10 while walking to school. I've never been able to pin down who did that but it's been ongoing problems ever since. It led to heart surgery and a giant ruptured brain aneurysm and still he had to try it one more time before circumstances awakened him. I often sit in on meetings of the group he's with and support them. They are outstandingly supportive of each other and I admire their stories and respect their journeys. You are blessed with the determination to keep getting right. I'm happy for your success and glad to get to know you over the years through your channel. The best to you, always. ⚘
I didn't have success through 12 step programs (not for alcohol). So even as a solid Christian who confidently follows a "Higher power", not all treatments are effective for everyone. I'm glad you were able to find a way to become accountable to a standard of sobriety you set for yourself, and maintain it. Freedom from the hold of addiction is hard to overcome, and I know your message of recovery was heard by someone who will pursue their own. Thank you for sharing.
I couldn’t agree more. There are so many ways to get and stay sober.
My cousin was an alcoholic. When he quit cold turkey he started making peanut butter cookies every night. Strange. But he stayed sober from alcohol but started on pain pills addiction.
Thank you for telling MY story along with, I'm sure, many others who suffer from the same demons. Thank you again for giving voice to our struggle 💜
🍁👵🇨🇦
Thank you Carolyn for the gift you just gave me and many others I’m sure.
I too tried 12 step and my life has been a long bumpy road too.
And I agree 12 steps works for so many people. But for me it was lacking which lead me to seek help from a psychotherapist.
I am 71 and still here on this planet and that’s something all things considered.
Thank you.
Really glad I watched this tonight, Carolyn. When you first put it out, I looked at the title and thought, "well, I'm not a drinker, so I don't think this will apply". I'm glad your therapist was there for you at the time you needed her the most. I'm a retired therapist. Years ago, I had a client who had experienced the worst childhood physical and sexual abuse I''ve ever heard about, in a thirty year work history. She was an alcoholic and my supervisor and colleagues all told me that she needed to stop drinking before we did the sexual assault therapy. My response to them (based on my own intuitive approach) was to remind them that her drinking was the only reason she was alive and I would not shame her for it. Instead, we honored it and she continued drinking until she didn't need to hide her story from herself. I've learned over and over again not to ever shame anyone, including myself, for doing the things we do to stay alive. Thank you for sharing your story. It really helped me to understand you and your journey better. Been watching for several years and will continue to do so.
Congratulations on your sobriety milestone and continued success.
Thanks ❤
Thank you so much!
You have inspired me big time! I’m not an alcoholic but I am quite over weight and can identify a lot with your story. Thank you! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
My mom aged at least fifteen years ahead of her real age from drinking, my sister died young from drinking. They both caused a lot of emotional damage to those of us who knew and loved them. Glad you are sober.
Wow Caroline, congratulations on being sober for so long. I truely believe that you had to go in it to get through it, refering to hitting rock bottom. I started getting therapy last December and honestly, it is life-changing. Thank you for being vulnerable 💜
Aw, good for you. I wish you all the best in your journey!
@@CarolynsRVLife thank you so much
"This isn't who I want to be." I love those words. Thank you for sharing your story. This is why I love your channels. You're unafraid of speaking your truth. I totally agree with you about sugar. It's in everything! Once I acknowledged my sugar addiction, my eyes were opened to the excessive amount of sugar in everything.
Hi Darrick, it's insane what they sneak sugar into. I still love my sugar but try to do it in moderation. Take care and thank you for being here and for your kind words. I appreciate you.
Wow. I can relate to a lot of this. Especially the childhood stuff - runs deep and it's hard to crack. I still can't remember exactly what some of the stuff was that happened. But I know I'm still really mad and that still really affects my life today. Thanks for your vulnerability and truth Carolyn ❤️
Yes! I too think I've worked through so much but realize there's events I might not remember. When I was on Savella for shingles nerve pain because it dials down emotions, I literally started finishing my nightmares. The next several months were like doing therapy with myself. Doesn't happen as often now.
Wow! What an inspirational video.
It was so brave of you to share your story!
Look at you now! Living and finding your authentic self…free and living your life with purpose.
Gives me hope for a loved one that has struggled with addiction. 🙏🏻👏👏👏
Respect! I live with a recovering addict, my granddaughter. She's a young single mother and I help take care of her children. I also have respect for her because she went cold turkey as soon as she found out she was pregnant. She's even survived months of kidney pain without meds. She concentrates on being the best mother she can be. Not perfect, but loved and worth it. ❤️
I also agree about the "higher power" bullshit! Knowing YOU are the one responsible for your choices gives you confidence that YOU hold the power! 💜
I just celebrated my 10 year anniversary of sobriety, and I didn't go to AA or any other 12 step program. After I got out of detox, I attended outpatient therapy (both group and individual) for about a year, and the rest is history.
Congrats on your many years of sobriety, Carolyn, and thanks for sharing your story.
Congratulations to you Caroline.. It's very hard to just stop..The demon calling you back all the time. I have 14 years clean and sober. The only thing that stopped myself from drinking was a stepdaughter that came into my life.She saved my life at the sweet age of 3. Now shes 17 and still is my lucky charm,my light in the dark.. Good luck to all fighting this demon,but dont ever give up.
Almost 37 years for me! Much drug use daily, alcohol till i ran out of money or ran out of booze and 2 pk a day cigarette habits. My salvation was Jesus. No withdrawals at all from that moment on. It was definitely a miracle in my life. I threw my cigarettes and drugs out (which I just bought an 8 ball) on my way home from work that night. The most amazing moment in my life. Thanks be to my Savior. I know many won't believe it but that's ok. I'm the one who experienced it.
Would you mind elaborating a little bit more on that? Like was it a spur of the moment decision or was there a build up to it or just how did you do that? Thank you in advance.😊
Thank you, Carolyn.
Sharing yourself, your battles, challenge's and victory over addiction(s) may serve as an inspiration for others.
As Cindy Lauper sang: True Colors, and that's why we love you. Stay strong. 💐
Love and blessings from Israel
💙🇮🇱🙏
An amazing journey with such a great ending that’s turned into a launching pad for you to help and nurture others in the direction they need to go. Thank you for your continued transparency and as always your creative paths to living a full life. 💕
Watching you just now was gut wrenching. I cannot tell you how proud I am of you! That was the most brave thing I have ever seen you do! You are strong and powerful and amazing! 💕Cathy in TN💕
Wow Cathy, Thank you so much! I just hope it helps people.. We can feel very alone when we're going through it. Hugs,
Hi everybody❣❣ Don't forget to share and like👍🥰
So glad you had such a wonderful therapist to go through that with you. Also, I’m glad you are here and teaching so many people what all you have learned in your journeys. I have learned so much about RVing over the years from you and finally just bought my first ever small class c. Looking forward to many trips. ❤️
Congrats❣
Carolyn, it is a pleasure to be a subscriber! I am honored that you are willing to share something so personal with everyone and I feel deeply that someone is going to be touched enough to pursue a change in their life.💛
AWESOME VIDEO! Quite a story, I’m so happy you survived it all. You salvaged your life from the edge of a shitty ending and turned it into one of courage, journey, and wonder! And you are sharing it here so beautifully.
I admire and respect you more than ever. Thank you beautiful lady ❤️
Aww.. wow Bill thank you so much for your words of compassion and encouragement.. just thak you!
Woohoooo Congratulations Carolyn and thank you for sharing your story to help others❣❣ Oct 25 marked 26 1/2 years of sobriety 4me 💙🦋💙 Yes ongoing therapy is so helpful!! In the recovery home I went to I learned that alcoholism/addiction is a hereditary disease some people are born with. The education I received from the daily classes in the recovery home was so helpful for me. Knowledge is power!! I believe everything happens for a reason and I'm so happy for where you are in your life now. Because if you weren't here you wouldn't be able to share all your talents with us, like you do. You helping yourself has helped so many others as well. Again, Congratulations🥰🦋🦋
Thank you!!
Congratulations to you 💯
Bravo👏👏👏👏 Carolyn! You are so very courageous in not only sharing your story but also your continued years of sobriety!! 👏👏👏. I choked up right along with you. Yes, finding the right fit with a therapist is essential to healing. Has taken me quite a few to finally feel I have one that is actually listening. Cheering you on, on your journey dear brave warrioress. 💜💫💜
Thank you for telling your story. I’m sure that I’m not the only one who teared up a little bit toward the end of the video..
😊❤ you’ve helped a lot of people this evening
Awesome job Carol. You're doing great 👍
Thank you so much!
Thank you carolyn for all that you share with us. Im an RN who worked in cd etoh and psychiatric and what you share i agree with 100%. Each journey is individual. Its a hard thing this 'being human'!
I drank during the summer between 9th and 10th grades and on some weekends in 10th grade. I remember going to my locker in the middle of the day and thinking I wish I had some wine or cherry vodka. Luckily I immediately realized how dangerous this was and quit! As an adult I wouldn’t even buy cooking wine bc I simply liked the taste of alcohol.
I want to thank you for sharing this about your life so openly!!!!!
I have a daughter age 24 who I’m very concerned about so I’ve shared your video with her! I really hope she gets the point of asking herself Why do I drink?
I enjoy following you in your travels! I subscribed not that long ago but had to subscribe again today. But I’m glad you’re on here. Stay safe and I’d love to play with Sadie.💕🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💕
I had absolutely no idea...well done🥀
Thank you!
I love how vulnerable, believable and relateable you are; coming from a crap childhood myself.
Your story is so deep and profound. Trauma is the basis for my issues as well. Thank you for sharing, Carolyn. Your honesty will help and inspire a lot of people!
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Carolyn! I think your journey and insights will help others. I’m glad AA works for some people but it wasn’t the path for me. I needed a more cognitive, no shame approach toward sobriety. The book/approach that worked for my husband and I was This Naked Mind by Anne Grace. Yesterday I was one year sober! At 65. It’s never too late! I hope your viewers will explore the book you mentioned and others that can give them solid alternatives to AA. Life is amazing when you’re sober!
It took so much courage to tell your story. You have made a difference, in so many peoples lives, by doing so.
My husband is a recovering alcoholic. He had an accident, that took another’s life, and that was his rock bottom. I can’t begin to explain the emotions and turmoil that he went through, as well as myself, and our family. Before the accident, I tried everything. I went everywhere, looking for help for him. Looking for help for myself and our family.
I was told, over and over again, you just have to step back and let it happen. When the auto accident happened, a person died. Was I just supposed to let that happen? He was incarcerated for many years, as a result.
Thank you for shining your light. I nearly lost my child to drugs in Albany. You have saved at least one life with your honesty. Peace.
🦋❣🦋Thankyou so much for sharing. I came to the edge of addiction, but I did something very stupid that backed me out. That was about 45 years ago. I do hope that you sharing will help someone. I admire your strength not only because you put your addictions out of your life, but most of all, you keep them out of your life. That's where the respect for yourself comes in. You are a beautiful person with so much to share.🦋❣🦋❣🦋❣🦋❣🦋❣🦋
Wow. I so admire your bravery to talk about what many would call poor choices. If you reach just one person, it will be worth it. My daughter died of a drug overdose. If you help someone not go through that pain, bless you.
Long time subscriber, and 38 years sober. I never have heard in all that time, anyone say "I'm nothing but a drunk" in A.A., or ever said it myself! I know people that got sober with a certain faith or religion. I do believe there is more than one way.
Despite a very short attention span I watched this whole video and can not say enough about how important it is!! Even if you have never had a problem with substances this message is priceless!💎🎯
Thank you so much.
Putting on the backpack and hitting the trail is the best therapy you have ever received. I was told to avoid therapists like and angry skunk. I remember the poverty and brutality of my childhood. I lived in my own world just to get through it. Back in that day, it was a class one mental illness. I was told that it was worse than alcoholism. BS. I am 76, retired, and my health is thanking me for it. Being on the spectrum has been more of a blessing than a curse. I have always enjoyed your videos, especially this one. Be healthy. Be strong. Be just.
I just love you Carolyn!! Your transparency and willingness to share your struggles to help others is really really inspiring to so many!!!! You are a BLESSING to many people. Keep doing you sister!! xoxo
You have come such a long way. Congratulations on your progress.
Thank you for your honesty.
Always! I hope it helps someone!
You are a light in my day!
Thanks for sharing!
I will add, even those of us that have never been drinkers need too pay attention.
RV life is a different kind of aloneness which can lead to isolation and frequent drinking.
Love,
Nashville Tennessee USA 🇺🇸
Wow, thank you for sharing this. My best friend was a functioning alcoholic, I took him to the hospital when he nearly drank himself to death one day. He tried AA after spending some time at an in-patient facility, but hated it. I wish we had had that book, it may have helped him. He lived another 20 years after that episode, continuing to drink, but eventually took his own life in 2010. I knew it would happen eventually, as he just wasn't willing to ask for the help he needed. I'm very happy that you were able to do the work and come out the other side.
WoW Carolyn, that was quite the story and a feat to share it with all of us, or should I say “bare it” with all of us.
You are a very courageous woman. Bravo and congratulations to you. You should be so proud of yourself. 😅
I hope many people get to see your video and that people who need or want help take a page from you.
You are an inspiration, and I thought that before I heard the story you shared today !💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
O.M.G. - This is one of the most powerful journey videos I’ve ever seen. You hit the core points; our wounds cause terrible suffering and we use to survive, only to discover we are still inflicting deeper injuries. Sometimes the original wound was of our own doing, sometimes it was through the agency of ‘another’. In the end it is simply an unbearable pain that must be recognized, addressed, cleansed and allowed to heal - the using is often a symptom and poorly constructed shield or attempt at creating a resolution.
I applaud your courage, though I know you neither need, nor seek my applause. But what you’ve done through this revealing post is open up new avenues for so many others lost in the morass of drugs and alcohol. I agree that the profundity of a well guided Jungian path is one of the most powerful tools available. Thank you so very much. You make me happy.🥰
You are so awesome, courageous, intelligent, beautiful... Not what I expected from you tonight and just blown away by your honesty and insight!!! Sending love to you from Yakima WA
Wow, thank you Janet!!
Thanks so much Carolyn for sharing your life struggle with addiction and how you have overcome it. It has certainly made you what and who you are today. Like you say there are so many people, myself included, that have or have had demons in our lives that have wanted to destroy us and beat us down to make us feel like we are nothing. But to overcome that has only made us stronger and free us from that bondage to be exactly who we are supposed to be. To have the courage and self-esteem to make a stand and go forward with our lives is such an amazing and joyful future to have. I'm so glad you are living it and I'm thankful to also be not just alive (a survivor) but to be a happy and a grateful person that loves my life now. For me it was having a personal relationship with the Lord and having the faith that He will never let go of my hand even though I had no idea what that meant years ago when I didn't want to live. Again thanks Carolyn for sharing your heart. I know there are a lot of hurting people out there that will benefit from your story. Blessings, Teri Hope Hope on the trail.
Thank you for your honesty and integrity in telling your story. I felt so many emotions as you spoke, feeling, with you, about the bumpy, potholed road to sobriety and consciousness.❤
Thank you for sharing your story!!! You are an amazingly strong woman and I am so sorry you had to endure the horrors you did. I don’t know exactly what you went through but I have an idea because I have a similar story, I believe. None of those things are your fault, and I’m so glad you’re still here. Other people can be evil. I’m so glad you didn’t let them win. So much easier said than done, right!? Hugs, and thank you for sharing this with us-it made me feel less alone in my grief from my past. I’m sober now as well and clean. Took decades as well. Now I tell myself those people who hurt me don’t deserve anymore of my life! And it works. Therapy saved me as well and it took decades to find the right one as you said.Thank you, and again, I’m so sorry you had to endure what you did. No one ever should have to suffer like that. Big big hugs!!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤ thank you!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. You are an incredible inspiration for so many. The work you’ve done for yourself is simply amazing.
I identify with a great deal of your story. I went into AA in 1986 and although I didn’t put much effort in, I got ‘sober/ dry’ - having problems with the HP concept ( using Good Orderly Direction) and also with the 2nd and 3d step- not seeing the program as being self deprecating( still can’t see that) but not being in control was difficult. I also didn’t feel accepted by old timers in the 80s and 90s and even had some trouble accepting the term Alcoholic until I saw that this word was an adjective as well as a noun. I saw the sugar problem, too- but know this is not done in every state. California for sure and Ohio, some but Washington, not at all. Eventually I opened myself up to the service part of the program and got more and more of the program and some real serenity. I have stayed sober for 36 years now and love the program. Whatever works for you… works for you. ❤️
I can relate to your story and have seen the way denial protected me from my childhood trauma. I have been on a healing journey for most of my life. It was not until I started going to Alanon and practicing the principles of the program that I have experienced peace and learned to take care of myself physically, mentally, and spiritually. I have been watching your videos for years and the things that you share have gone hand in hand with the program and have helped me to grow and reclaim my personal freedom. I study the steps and go to meetings that are healthy. I have a support system in place. Just know that you have been a source of inspiration and have shown me how to go after my dreams and find the courage to go on adventures pulling an RV by myself starting at age 65. I'm 69 now and don't let much hold me back anymore. Girl, you are awesome!
Now I’m starting to understand why I’m connecting to you at some level. It’s the peeling the onion piece. I went through the melting down to my core piece. My little brother, my closest buddy for life, died of AIDS in 1990. Just before he died, my older brother broke his neck in a car accident. He is a quadriplegic. I had a baby, severe depression, and now grief of the deepest kind I can even imagine. I found a great therapist and she saved my life, my career, my well being. Therapy was not the quick kind. Years and years. I should still be going, but she retired and is probably 80 now. I’m 70. But I think I recognized your honesty and awareness of yourself. You have been so brave and accomplished. I have too. Surviving and thriving something that brings you to your knees in a way that you could easily give up shows a deep strength.
I am so glad Carolyn that you had finally with all that you had gone through got what sources you needed to turn your life around and be able to now tell everyone your story. A lot of people out there are proud of you and it took a long time but you made it and you're still going strong..
While I have lots of 24 hours sober now, I have great respect for everyone who has their first few hours, days, weeks, months, and years. In my younger years, I remember leaving several Albany bars and driving in a blackout twenty miles and ending up in front of a factory at 6AM. At the time I thought that was pretty neat. I'm so glad my only accidents just did body damage and not human damage. I became a maintenance drinker for several years after that. I avoided drugs just due to my own fear and realization that it would hit a raw nerve. Worked through another addiction or drama and am 74 now and enjoying almost every day. Great video, thank you.
I'm very proud of you, not only being a survivor but telling your story to help others. I've been a widow since I was just shy of 28 (now 67 and never married again), my second husband committed suicide in a rehab. My oldest daughter now 48 has been clean and sober for about 13 years. I agree about AA, maybe my being an Atheist Alanon didn't make sense to me and AA didn't work for my husband. There is a lot more to this story, but I will stop here, take care.
Thanks for sharing this with us💜. I think it's important to hear people's stories. It helps us learn, have a little more compassion and maybe not judge as much. Everyone has a story and you never know what they've been through. Thank the stars you came through your challenges and are here to share with us. 💜
I have never had the desire to drink or do drugs but have family members that were caught in those clutches. Thank you for being brave enough to share your story.
Congratulations on your sobriety. This past August was my 7th year living sober. My addiction was literally killing me.
Thank you for all your help, You have been, are and will continue to be a Lighthouse in this horrible storm…
You are a strong, beautiful person Carolyn. You inspire so many! You are a great counselor yourself!
Be happy, be free & be kind!
I am so happy too that you are maintaining your sobriety and health. Sadie is such a good puppy and so wonderful for you. Yes, a therapist…the right one helped you save your life!🧘💞🎃 Thank you for your sharing
Hi Carolyn. Thank you so, so much for speaking out. And congratulations on your continued abstinence.
I haven't watched your follow-up video yet, but I hope it isn't apologetic.
I, too, ended my alcohol addiction without AA.
12-step programs are brainwashing cults that can be extremely psychologically damaging.
I had a friend who battled lifelong addictions and was devout to 12-step programs. She overdosed and is literally lying frozen in a morgue. Like, *right now*. My best teenage friend.
I hate 12-step programs with a passion. They are unscientific, have an extremely high failure rate, are disparaging / devaluing and WILL NOT suggest other methods for getting clean.
If you are addicted, RUN, don't walk, RUN in the opposite direction because there are plenty of alternatives. You can love Jesus and explore scientifically-validated treatment options, too. You are not full of character defects and you are not doomed to be labeled an addict for the rest of your life.
And Bill Wilson was a womanizing, drug-abusing hypocrite.
For those considering Moderation Management, read up on its founder, Audrey Kishline, and see how that worked out for her. It wasn't pretty.
SMART Recovery and Secular Organizations for Sobriety (SOS) are a couple of good (and FREE) places to learn to stop obsessing, unlike ball-and-chain 12-step programs.
Good topic that is hidden from viewers. Many will relate to this topic. I didn't think that you did all the stuff you consumed. You are an inspiration to many other viewers.
You SAVED yourself Carolyn ....you were not born to throw your precious LIFE away, no matter how good or bad it was. it was a long road and you did it!, well done and a huge thankyou for still being here Carolyn
I've admired you for quite a while, and you sharing your journey over the years has helped me feel strong and capable and empowered and comfortable in my own skin as a "strong personality"! But THIS video... If others felt what I felt, many will find the strength and courage to take a quick peek behind the wall that has hidden our trauma and pain. You are a light in so many ways to so many people. My gratitude for you is overwhelming. Many hugs to you and Sadie.
So much truth in this video.
I’ve never been a drinker but I’m with you, Carolyn, on being your own hero. No room for fear or being manipulated into change of any kind. Childhood trauma is devastating to the people we were born to be but it doesn’t have to leave us hopeless; We can take charge. So very proud of you for cracking the code to health.
What a hard road in your journey to sobering life. Your store helped me to understand what my family member could possibly be feeling & going through. Thx u for that. Take great courage to share & to look within for the why, the pain & stop what is harmful, no east task.
I can relate to the flood of tears once u realized the world u knew was hiding ur pain. I thought I was never going to stop crying when I looked within. Thx u again Carolyn. 🤗💓🐕🐾🙏🏽
Thank you Carolyn. It was so good to hear this from you. I am 7 years sober. Sometimes I accidentally drink in my dreams and I get really upset. I am so relieved to wake up sober.
Shallow people might think you are not normal well I say you are above normal… You Got this … Bravo to you Life is good and precious.
Carolyn, you are an outstanding human being. I admire your strength and determination. I have so much respect for you and I am proud of you. This choked me up. You are loved by so many of us. Always stay strong.👍♥️
I really appreciate your story and celebrate your success! I, too, had childhood trauma and sought professional help, with success. Counseling is like a master's level class and the subject matter is me. Abstinence alone is not enough. We must have hope and learn to love ourselves. I yo-yoed up and down 30-60 lbs for many years, killing myself with food, living a sad, demoralizing existence, headed toward a slow, painful death. My drug that I abused is sugar. Life exponentially improved when I chose to abstain from added sweeteners almost 14 years ago. I, too, have a problem with the god thing, but the fellowship of meetings meets my social needs. I love my meetings and my friends there. It's a very positive environment.
I’ve been sober for 22 years. AA was difficult for me too. I used it as an educational tool to learn about alcoholism. I pretty much brainwashed myself to believe what happened to others who went back “out” will happen to me. And I didn’t want those consequences. But what really did help me to stay sober was going to Alanon. Almost same steps, but it made me the one accountable for my feelings and action. Coming from an alcoholic family it helped me to understand why I was the way I was.
I absolutely loved your testimonial. I could relate to so much of your story. Especially the pill part. It’s funny the things we tell ourselves.
Hi from Prince Edward Island 🇨🇦
Wow..... What a story...
You are a SURVIVOR..
Joan
Very inspiring....
I was moved by your testimony. I bet it has given others hope. I too admire the courage it took to be so brutally honest. I love the people who have suffered in life because they have a heart for others. Suffering is by no means pleasant but it can bring so much good if you learn from it. Suffering is meant to humble you and make you teachable.
Thank YOU, simply that: Thank YOU!
You are a wonderful person to share your story with us.
I got my husband’s permission to write this since it’s his story more than mine.
He has been clean and sober now 9 1/2 years. AA did not work for him. He would go to a meeting and then buy a bottle on his way home. He was told if he couldn’t believe in God to make his higher power a door knob. Really? He had a problem with AA making him feel like a worthless person. I do not recommend what he did to get sober though. He went cold turkey with everything and then had a few seizures. He went through withdraw without any help and his doctor said it could have killed him. He accidentally almost cut his thumb off while having one of those seizures. On the few times he thinks he might want a drink, he touches the scar across his thumb and says, “nope. Not again.” He says the reason he’s alive is because of me. Not true. He did the work himself and I am so very, very proud of him.
Looking forward to meeting you on Thursday.