Doctor Reacts To FUNNIEST Onion Medical Headlines #1
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 พ.ค. 2024
- I've been a fan of The Onion for many years. For those of you unfamiliar, the onion is a satirical newspaper that focuses on current events. I have seen it trick people on Facebook before. Anyway, let's enjoy a nice laugh during a difficult time such as this.
If you have an idea of something you want me to cover in-depth, please let me know because I take your requests seriously. We will be back with more Medical Drama Review/Responding to comments Series in a couple of weeks so please submit more names of shows/questions you'd like for me to watch/answer. Love you all!
- Doctor Mike Varshavski
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** The information in this video is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/health professional **
This video is like when you tell your mom a joke and she turns it into a lecture
Oh my god thats so accurate. Especially with the fingerless gloves
I like Dr Mike, but how does he have time to create such videos while his city suffers
Abhisheik Patangey sometimes you gotta lighten to mood a bit more. These videos really take your mind off the virus, so in a way it’s saving a lot of people stress. Because of that he’s actually saving lives. LoGiC
ChrisCarGuy - True
Bro i literally commented this 21 hours ago and i dont get one heart from doctor mike😭
Fav Onion headline ever is “amazing, miracle of birth occurs for 8 billionth time”
LOLOLOLOL
teehee
Even Jesus stopped making wine once in a while...
Hasn't there been more than 8 billion people on earth or is the joke that the miracle happens so often every day?
@@OveranalyzingEverything the latter, that we call something a miracle even though it’s so common.
@@Macapta but then again there has been more than 8 billion people born. The ones alive today and the ones from the past.
"Seriously injured woman heroically fends off paramedics trying to put her in medical debt"-my favorite
Basically when someone's about to call the ambulance for you, so you gotta show them that you're not sick enough to need an ambulance.
Speaking of wrong grandparents, something like that actually happened to me:
At the elderly home my grandmother is staying at, I visited her one weekend and was waiting in the common room, and the caretaker brought out the wrong grandma. The funny part is both my grandmother and the one they brought out have dementia, so even though I'd never met her, she thought I was a relative and was ecstatic to see me. After the caretaker found the correct grandmother, the three of us sat around and had a wonderful chat. Just me and my two grandmothers.
What this is a great comment lol
That's really sweet.
that’s amazing 😭
caretaker… dementia…
💀
We all have two grandmothers, that's how procreation works 🙂
Dr. Mike: freeze-away toe remover
Cinderellas step sisters: **nervous sweating**
Underrated.
But does it also work on heels?
Dove: rockadeedoo there's ice in the shoe.
Oof
Daniel F. I don't think so
Plot twist: The Onion is actually predicting the future
Oof
Oh no....
Funny
On more than one occasion...
Someone needs to check on the Mickey containment.
6:17 I have a badly suppressed immune system. I had a doctor for years who was a professor, and he would bring about a dozen students when seeing me. Of course I had given him permission. He wanted to see how different students handled examining the same patient. So my medical appointments about every three months would go on for a couple of hours. He would have them come in one at a time to do their exam, and then after everyone was done, he would do the exam and narrate everything he was doing and explaining why about everything, and then spend about a half hour having a class discussion. One student from West Africa correctly diagnosed that I had a patch of leprosy starting, and no one else caught it, not even the professor. The thing that tipped him off was that I had a numb patch on my back, and he ordered a test, and that is what it was. Turns out it is still a lot more common in the US than people think, but it is much more common in developing countries, and he immediately recognized it. It is bacterial, and apparently attacks nerves, so the reason that people wind up with wounds is that they don't fell pain where a wound is starting, and it gets worse.
Cool story! Hope your doing well, even with a bellow average immune system! :D
@@chestio3488 lmao I can't tell if you're concerned for him or just making fun of him!!!
That's like an episode of House.
Thank you! I'm a medstudent and we need patients like you
Doctors in Africa are used to seeing all different types of diseases; in South Africa we have everything because of all the people that have immigrated here from other African countries. When Covid hit Africa we already had ample experience with contagious diseases and viruses.
This is concerning. I first heard of the "nutritionists say people who eat right shouldn't poop at all" thing from my mother. It was passed on to me as real news because she had seen it on TV being presented as such. My mother does not know how to use a computer, and (of course) has no social media accounts. She doesn't have a cellphone and we still use a landline phone here at the house. If she says she saw it on the news, she means it. I was going weeks thinking "nutritionists are going crazy" each time I went to the bathroom. I had no idea it was from The Onion. But now, I do. That means, someone around or in South Carolina thought it was real news and put it on our news networks to be shown as such. I'm rambling. Trying to think about it is blowing my mind.
That someone thought it was real is not surprising. That nobody else questioned it before it reached getting presented, is what is deeply concerning.
@@KimonFrousiosIt’s the people that use social media and take everything at face value.
Around me sometimes on slow news days they'll put up things like that as a funny. "See what the Onion says LOL" but then I can imagine people who might miss that first part see it and think it's real.
The Onion has tricked newscasters into repeating its articles quite a few times now lol
That thought predates The Onion by decades at least.
Dr Mike: These are just jokes, don't take them seriously
Dr. Mike: *Takes the jokes seriously*
This like talking to your parents xD
I feel like he’s also wanting to make sure that people understand the truth vs the joke so they know it’s a joke. I liked that he took the jokes and explained where they most likely originated and why they wouldn’t happen for real. 😁
he's a medical professional, cut him some slack :P
I mean... what else is he supposed to do? Read medical memes and like... laugh 3 times?
@@joy100ish yeah read the top comment
“You owe me a half hour of my life back”
😂😂😂 👏👏👏 When it comes to wasting peoples’ time, insurance companies are so in debt they can’t possibly pay everyone back!
When it comes to wasting peoples' time, the doctors are so in debt they can't possibly pay everyone back. I don't bother going to doctors because I won't wait the 45+ minutes late that they always are, even when I make certain I'm the first patient of the day.
@@mortimerbrewster3671 You don't bother going to the doctors? Dude, ya really need to start going! Even if it's just twice a year!
Moonlit_Sky2712 nah. If he doesn’t want to go, he doesn’t have to. That’s one Less person to pollute the world
@@saltedlemons5908 exactly
My old youth therapist, first name Karen, literally ended up speaking to the manager and put me on emergency supply after they hadn’t sent in my mood stabilizers nearly a month after writing in the prescription
The one where the doctor supposedly asked to bring in his poker buddies was funny until I remembered a story of my mums births. The doctor who was responsible for delivering my brother brought in the delivery room his wife to watch my mum give birth so he could convince her to have a baby with him. My mum wasnt really satisfied with him as a doctor,so she went to a new one when she was having me. The second doctor brought in the delivery room his under-age high-school son to watch a live birth because the kid wanted to go to med school 😂
Certainly, watching a woman screaming in labour is absolutely the best way to convince his wife to have a kid. *Eye roll* lol
That's shocking. So violating.
Wtf kinda hospital was that? An episode of Scrubs?
@@Jack1994hoo a hospital in Greece during the 90s my friend 😂
As I understand, when I was born the doctor brought into the room a sandwhich. Because she was called in off her lunch break.
*“If doctors have crows feet, it means they care.”*
- Dr Mike, 2021
That left me confused for a second, because I thought he was talking about caltrops...
@@GaehhnLMAO
Mike looking at a _’toe remover’:_ “Oh, I have this thing! I’ve used it before!”
Yeah, I used it too so now I'm down to 12 toes. Wish me luck on getting the other 4 off.
(Edit) thanks for the likes, y'all really like toes apparently
@@hiimjohnquinones2971 bruh
@@hiimjohnquinones2971 Hol' up.
@@hiimjohnquinones2971 A true intellectual
Video Star yo same
Everbody else: I need a haircut!
Dr Mike: I need a pedicure!
I wish my dad agreed to let me cut his hair.....😂😂😂
I can relate I need both
I need all
SIKE
Wow this comment is getting loved so much...by the I appreciate your channel
Easy Medicine by TMD 🤣😭
I have a rare condition. When I was a teenager, I was in the hospital for treatment and the doctor asked if some of her medical students could sit in. She was so excited to share this because having this condition at such a young age is almost unheard of. I said yes, thinking it was just going to be a few people discussing my case.
NOPE.
They came while I was asleep in the morning. No warning, no bra, hair unbrished, and feeling very vulnerable. And in comes about 30 mostly male medical interns crowded around my bed to watch her trigger a reaction from my condition. It was humiliating.
Safe to say, that poker buddies joke isn't too far off the mark.
Ah, I'm sorry they didn't give you better warning to prepare or change your mind.
I love how Sam always has to be explaining jokes in the background
"...the most infectious part of your hand... are fingertips."
Me while biting my nails: 👁👄👁
I've been called out-
@@AstralArbourSys fellow enby?
@@KatKitty_ yep! enbies of the internet unite lmao
I WAS BITING MY NAIL WHILE READING THIS COMMENT HSKJDKSJSKJKD
Just builds your immune system.
Toe remover: *exists
Dr mike: I used this before
Me: *concerned
Look up on youtube An Omaly - News Analysis & Hip-hop You won't believe how this young man sees all of this He is so correct*! They don't wanna hurt their reputations and give us uh dumb people the actual truth ? My father was a physicist and he knew that in the 90's they were very capable of doing just that * We know nothing?
THATS WHAT I THOUGHT
@@PeachesCourage what are you talking about?
PeachesCourage what?
@@PeachesCourage What in the *heck* are you talking about, Peaches.
I can tell you as an a pretty great poker player that the reason they were dark glasses is because your pupils dilate when you see something valuable. Just be sure to get non-reflective ones.
Is it when you see something valuable? Or something that commands your attention; for example something you want? 'Something valuable' sounds awfully nebulous to be something your body has an explicit reaction to.
@@devonm042690 Absolutely
"never reveal any of your symptoms"
simulated patients in the OSCE: "write that down, write that down!"
🤣 too relatable!
"Chest compressions, chest compressions, chest compressions"
It's about time.
nah it's too late. he ded now.
I thought you just keep shocking them until their heart beats and then scream, "It's alive!"
same with "BEE-WOOP!"
@@draconicepic4124 Only if they are flat linining
Ladies and gentlemen, we got a "pee woop"!
All is right in the world.
Yesss I was Soo happy I rewinded it back just to do it with him
Pee? He can't be very healthy then
@@wingy6060 pun intended 🤔😄
The fact that you got duped even though you know full well the Onion is satire is the best thing. So pure. Don't ever change.
My favorite Onion article was one they put out years ago (early 2000's) that said the FDA had approved salmonella for human consumption. I showed it to some of my relatives, who were outraged! Lol
“Does you doctor have crows feet ? That means they care” 😂
Actually it means that theres a crow out there with no feet
@@peacefulinvasion684 I'm sure rabbits would be happier, if this trends.
@@peacefulinvasion684 It's the law of equivalent exchange
Dr. Mike doesn't care is confirmed.
4:59 - True story: When my son was born, the nurses (especially in the nursery unit) were fawning over him and saying how cute he was -- "no really, I say this to every parent, but yours really is the most adorable baby I've seen in a long time", etc. By the end of our time in the hospital, I was telling the nurses, "Well of course he's the cutest one; I picked him out myself." The older nurses thought it was hilarious; the new nurses were horrified.
Are you my mother ? XD because that's the EXACT same story she told me XD
I was gonna comment about the baby security bracelet thing. If someone is gonna steal a baby, why wouldn't they.. just take the bracelet off the baby..
@@danielkeslerjr4407 my guess is it makes a sound or alert the security or simply stops openning the door when removed
@@danielkeslerjr4407: The bracelet is has a built-in tamper alarm, in the form of a heartbeat monitor. It presses tightly against the bottom of the baby's foot, and if it stops detecting a heartbeat (or if it detects heart arrhythmia) it goes nuts.
if he's cute then he's probably not your son
I remember one day my doc explained this to me "Hypothetically, eating 5 pounds of carrots is still 5 pounds. And while carrots are good for you, excessive is just as unhealthy as not eating healthily enough"
The 'bringing interns in for observation' made me laugh out loud for real! When I was delivering my twins, my doctor was golfing with his 13 year old son. He not only asked if he can bring in the interns, but he asked if his son could just sit quietly in the corner in the back of the room because he wants to be a doctor when he grows up! Of course, by that time, EVERY woman is like, ' Yes! Whatever! Stop talking let's get these babies out!' So you KNOW how crowded that delivery room was! Each baby had their own set of nurses and other staff, plus 7 interns, plus his kid sitting in the corner on a plastic chair. It was crazy, man! lol! :)
*How to find the right doctor, a guide:*
1) look all over your town
2) if necessary look in a few other towns near by
3) if the above fails move to New Jersey and look for Doctor Mike
4) say *PEEWOOP*
5) Congrats! you have found a great doctor!
I SO wish this was true. I live in New Jersey, but I doubt Doctor Mike is taking new patients.
Wallace Lam I’m glad I could help!😂
I live in New Jersey but I doubt he is taking new patients 😞
peewoop
Courtney hghahahsdkaksksndn try bein the one person that walked by him (months ago!) and recognised him, but got shy :(
I love the sound of his laugh , his laugh are amusing . 😂💕
I are liking it too
aveRAGE joe i are in fact liking it to
And the fact that you don't know what grammar is. Is amusing
allie kasarcik
incorrect punctuation in the middle of your sentence.
allie kasarcik lol that was uncalled for bruh she just expressed she liked his laugh, u didn’t have to go “WelL youR GrammAr iS AmuSIng”
I've been reading The Onion since it was only a print newspaper in Madison, WI, and it's always been fantastic.
Unrelated to health but my favorite article was Tips to Stay Cool in the Summer, and their suggestions included such gems as "Wear a tinfoil hat," "Buy a Celsius thermometer to enjoy temperatures that rarely exceed 40 degrees," and "Stay in your dank cave and guard your precious."
I could not have Dr. Mike as my physician. I would constantly be mesmerized by his impossibly fantastic hair.
"The Onion is a satirical newspaper..."
No, The Onion is The Finest News Source!
It's more reliable than the BBC
@@somegoodsoup7008 and FOX.
And NYT.
And ABC
CBS
MSNBC
NBC
USA Today
TWSJ
TWP
POLITICO
Bloomberg
Vice News
HBO
HuffPost
TMZ
CNET
NPR
THR
Newsweek
TNY
Time
US News and World Report
And The Guardian.
@@jimluvsgene and Russia Today.
@@jimluvsgene and France 24.
Dr Mike is the only person who can turn a joke into a lecture without making it annoying
I like people who can organically drop nuggets of knowledge, if it's someone whose professional field is related and it's like factoids that are interesting and not common knowledge. It's like an attractive quality, yknow?
Dyhia ⵣ it's just because he's good looking
Dyhia ⵣ one of the main reasons that I keep watching his videos ❤️
Ttue
Nah, it's still annoying.
the fact that even you actually bleached your teeth when you were young makes the "too white teeth in the us" stereotype make perfect sense. I have never heard of anyone doing that here, it sounds dangerous
It sounds weird
"Never tip them off by revealing any of your symptoms . . ." My brother actually did that, went to the doctor and didn't tell him he'd been exposed to mono. Got a medication cross-indicated for mono and wound up with this crazy rash.
“Do you want to live or die” 😂😂
May i take the latter?
@@outtathepantry :( you ok there?
You'll be surprised
@@outtathepantry You'd have to go out and protest in public without a mask for that atm :P
That's a harder question these days.
2 things I've learned in this video:
1. His eyes are pretty
2. He can be my doctor any day😂
He can't be my doctor. 😊
I learned that he used to do professional poker
Simp
Simp
He must be a poptart
15ish years ago, when I had my babies, they only put a security tag on the baby so nobody could take it from the nursery unapproved or whatever.. like a library book.. It's hilarious to me, but I'm also very glad for this extra step.
doctor mike is like the love interest in a cheap romance novel and honestly, im here for it
Dr. Mike: "All of this is in fun, it's a joke!"
Also Dr. Mike: explains the medical side of every joke and how the article is massively incorrect.
Me: oh, doc... This is why we love ya.
That is really Mike's entire mission statement with this channel. Is to be friendly and entertaining while providing useful medical information.
Except he played along for "ask [the doctor] straight up if they've ever killed a patient on purpose".
Coincidence? I think not.
@@liger04 LMAO😂😂
I mean it's interesting context, right?
How the joke relates to the real world situation that might have prompted the joke.
Who is that in ur profile pic
“None of the headlines are true” The Onion a month ago: Trump is gonna recommend injecting disinfectant
XDDD
Ahhhh, when satire becomes reality...
its where trump must get his news lmao
He was talking about a UV injection treatment that blasts your lungs with light.
Gr3nadgr3gory, I can't tell if you're joking. I saw the clip everyone saw.
Actually, HIPAA doesn't have anything to say on you sitting in on a friend's exam as long as your friend approves. My best friend took me with her for her brain cancer treatments because I'd been through them with my mother and she knew I'd understand everything they were telling us. The doctors didn't mind since it was her idea. I even sat next to the MRI and held her hand as she got her scans.
"a good [doctor] would know how to ask what you mean without sounding judgmental" Last part crucial!! LOL
“You owe me a half hour of my life back.” I’m using this every time I have to talk to dumb people from now on. 😂
You do know they're *everywhere*?
Then you'll waste another half hour trying to explain it to them... because they're dumb.
@@melissablackwood then tell them they owe you an hour.
@@melissablackwood Or... I don’t explain it at all, and even though I won’t get that half hour back, I’ll save the half hour not explaining it to them. I’ll say I broke even and call it a day.
Coming from a country with one of the best health insuranceses: I feel so sorry that stuff like that is actually happening in the biggest economy of the world :(
"Never tell them any of your symptoms."
😂😂😂
just play a little game of guessing. lets see if you can guess what hurts doc! they start hitting you in every place possible lol
@@kevinlandrini6799 ohh dude, your comment is brilliant 😂
I've been going to the same GP for like 8 years and I have a whole laundry list of rare chronic illnesses, including a rare genetic disorder. Any time the clinic has student doctors there sitting in on appointments, he knows I'm cool with being a learning opportunity in terms of complex patients, lol. I've had some pretty interesting questions, but thankfully they've always been respectful 😅 I figure learning about me and what my ongoing care involves could help some kid down the line who's just been diagnosed with my condition/s, when their doctor remembers what my GP and I told them.
3:33 the aww 🥰 is literally awwwww....
OMG! I encountered a patient today.. after greeting him, I asked him how he's feeling now ( he had taken medication for a sore throat 10 days ago) and he responded, " YOU TELL ME? " I was confused, so I asked him again, "do you have any symptoms right now"
He said, "If I answer everything, what will you do? Should I do your job for you?"
I tried to explain to him that I can't treat him if I don't know how he's feeling/what his symptoms are..
He just bluntly said, "it's your job to know how I'm feeling"
As if we're psychics 🙄🙄
What do you mean the nerveus system helps a lot when diagnosing problems?
You should know how they feel, you should know as the doctor, duh.
I hear giving children a lollipop makes them a lot more cooperative.
Come on, Egghead! You got the papers on the wall, so you tell me.
"I'm gonna call a partner"
"oH aRe You ThAT iNcoMpetENT"
"No, they're a vet, the only doctor who can know what a patient is feeling without asking"
"Pooping is great. Urinating-- great."
What a stunning review from Doctor Mike. I'll have to look into this.
Er....not TOO closely, I hope?
Not too close though, ok?
[Edit]
Someone beat me to it
Sounds like Dr Mike has some enjoyable times in the bathroom.
Big if true
4:50 Why did you skip over the explanation, I was just as confused as Mike, and still am
Same still tryna understand?! Like is it cuz doctors protect their witnesses? (Patients)? Doesn’t work!! Golly
6:18 Story time. When I got my vasectomy I ended up with an infection that had my genitals temporarily deformed. While I was waiting in the waiting room, my attending physician came in with a medical student asking to see my condition. At the time there was a “candy-striper” (community volunteer with no medical training) in the room so I refused. I guess the story got around because the rest of my stay at the hospital was made up of doctors coming I to my room with students, self-righteously explaining that it was a teaching hospital and the value of showing medical students active conditions, me explaining what happened, and then the doctor agreeing that that never should have happened. I wonder how many times the doctor who admitted me got talked to by each subsequent doctor.
Doctor, fighting with insurance company: "You owe me a half hour of my life back."
Patient, fighting with insurance company: "You owe me my life back."
Insurance companies really are the worst.
@@wesnohathas1993 they really are, especially when it comes to medical care.
@@wesnohathas1993It's a joke at this point. "OH don't worry insurance will pay for it!"
“in the future, humor will be randomly generated”
onion: *this seems like a job for me me*
69 likes
N I C E
Now this looks like job for me so everybody just follow me
@@dilyuq3714 cuz we need a little controversy, cuz it feels so empty without me
hai kazuma desu
Hi
7:50 after successfully stopping heart
Whenever I see the fingerless glove meme, it reminds me of some of the nurses who tried to draw my blood for lab tests.
They would put on the gloves, then rip open one of the index fingertips to feel the vein.
They always got offended when I refused to let them draw my blood unless they put on new (unbroken) gloves.
Doctor Mike: "honestly all these organs are looking the same to me right now"
Me: lol nice one
Doctor Mike: Honestly this struggle is real
Me:hahah....wait......what?
Suddenly, your kidney gets replaced with a heart
@@soupisfornoobs4081 oH nOoOoOo
*uh oh*
@@r0b0b0t8 well you only need... wait... MIKE PLEASE EXPLAIN AAAAA
@@henk-3098 Two lungs, anyone? Two legs, two arms, two ears... two brain hemispheres.... One heart is enough, we're not Kaijus. C'mon man.
WHEN IS THE CHEST COMPRESSION MERCH COMING DOCTOR MIKE. IM TIRED OF THE GAMES.
"I'M NOT PLAYIN THESE GAMES"
Nobody to compress your chest during quarantine? That's rough.
Reg Aint playin' no GAMES!
Maria reg is right to throw dem hands
gotta love how The Onion can sometimes make something sound real.
I don’t usually like these kinds of videos but laughing along with (or at 🤷🏻♀️) Doc Mike makes me very happy. And laughter IS the best medicine! ❤️
That “beewoop” gave me more serotonin than my stimulus check.
saaammmeee!
The accuracy! 😂😂
"Get on the phone spend half an hour arguing with the insurance company"
This is the doctor we all need.
True
My dentist took time out of their own day to argue that 2 (not just 1) of my 4 new crowns were required, not cosmetic. Saved me about $1500.
(Convinced them that it was $1500 now, or covering adult braces later and THEN the crown anyway. The insurance, surprisingly, saw the light.)
@@R.Daneel what ? they are physically able to think long term ? i thougth it was impossible
@@devforfun5618 They are surprisingly good at predicting the future, whether in underwriting, claims, or patient reps. Corporate penny pinching is the problem.
This is a doctor nobody SHOULD need. Seriously, America, you're the last first world country not having universal health care...
My favorite ones are the ones that look true until you think about it thoroughly
Thank you for all you do Dr. MIke. As a healthcare worker I so appreciate the laughs and knowledge you pass on from your channels.
"Dr. Scholl's Introduces New Freeze-Away Toe Remover"
Dr. Mike : "oh I have this thing"
😂😂😂😂 sure you do
I read this then that part came😂😂
@Emmelene Perencevich Exactly 🤦😂😂😂
@Emmelene Perencevich ik
Sounds like a severe case of frostbite to me😏...
I'm sad that he missed "after successfully stopping his patient's heart"
nono, doctors do that for medical procedures
My husband had open heart surgery and his heart was stopped in order to get a heart valve replacement. He was connected to a heart-lung bypass machine for awhile. Scary time! FYI: He’s fine and back to working out again every day.
@@mjolnirsoul9214 but it was stopped for the entire night.. then the doctor came back for it the next mornin
@@sabahhasbi3765 well yes that's the joke there but I was just pointing out that doctors do in fact stop hearts during surgeries
@@mjolnirsoul9214 well yea I just pointed out the fact that it's not the same circumstances.
That was so funny! It's more than a year into Covid, and the laughter is still needed now just as much as it was a year ago.
For every few bad apple doctors there are the golden ones like you.
"Doctor, I've got a pain in my kiddlies!"
"Do you mean kidneys?"
"That's what I said, diddle I?"
Sauce: Kurt Vonnegut, "When Mortals Sleep"... kinda...
@@Maurycy5 Ah, interesting! I was thinking of Tommy Cooper.
@Mahdin Bhuiyan ITS TRUE !! I GAVE HER $300 !!!!!
Isn’t that the joke from Star Trek? Love it!
I feel like I'm having a stroke
I felt an ungodly amount of joy at hearing the bee-woop again!
Sameeeeeeeee
0:24 what I love most about that picture is that the person making it put a random dot in the middle of the ice wastes of Greenland.
I am a retired nursing home diretcor, friends with Drs I worked with. One was teaching when I had a mole removed. 7 students each stitched my arm one knot
“Nutritionists reveal humans with proper diet should not be defecating”
IDK why I laughed so much but at least my anxiety was reduced👍🏻
I didn’t expect my comment to be hearted thanks❤️
Now your allertness increased
PRPITPRP lol
GAGAGAGAGAAGAG this is wonderful! PRANK! It is terrible! I looked in the mirror and saw something UNPRETTY: my face. GAGAGAGAG! But I am happy again because I have TWO HOT GIRLFRIENDS and I make cool YT videos with them! Good evening, love and peace, dear op
I wonder if this is a reference to a claim by some raw vegans that if you are eating right you won't have periods. (If you're unfamiliar, you should google it. It's hilariously stupid)
1:42 "... Success is not paying for customers' medical care"
The World*: lol
*The US: Wait, where's the joke?
i still don't understand the joke 😭
Health insurance companies have customers paying a monthly or a yearly fee for a certain type of health insurance so that when they go to see a doctor or to the hospital they just pay a fraction of the price on medication and treatments. The problem is, health insurance companies have a lot of particularities to try to get out of actually paying for the treatments and medication like Dr. Mike's story about his patient.
In other places like Europe, people are already insured by their government so they don't have to pay for healthcare or have personal health insurance, unlike in the US
@@TheCatgirl America makes people pay. I dunno how many countries don't make you but I know Australia has free health care
portia uk too! Free healthcare over here✌️
portia so does New Zealand
7:45 I'm pretty sure Dennis Kelly is a playwright who wrote a play called DNA, we're learning about it in drama at school
Anecdote of the day: I was at the hospital, getting ready to pick up my pa, and one of the doctors tries to put an older mute lady into my car, a horrified translator behind her trying to get the guy to stop.
My favorite: “You owe me a half hour of my life back”
I’m a pharmacy tech and I feel this way every time I talk to insurance!
My mom says the doctors at insurance companies are the ones who graduated at the bottom of their class and couldn’t get a residency 😂
The only people worse than doctors in keeping people waiting is the pharmacist. I'm lucky that I don't need regular medicine but I've been with friends who've asked for me to "quickly" run by the pharmacy to pick up their medicine. Fucking waste of time.
@@mortimerbrewster3671 Just so you know it is highly likely that it's the insurance company keeping the pharmacist held up and delaying your pick up time. Pharmacists and pharmacy technicians do not and cannot control your co-pay, and/or your insurance company's requirements like prior authorizations.
I’m a diabetic and during corona my pharmacy ran out of insulin and we couldn’t get any insulin for hours. My mother literally called three pharmacies and than ended going to the hospital because I was that low on insulin
@@lineisdumb6556 I'm sorry that happened to you. If 3 pharmacies didn't have your insulin, it sounds like a supply problem. Covid is supposedly causing several drug backorders
This "you owe me half an hour of my life back" is so perfectly expressed. If only they actually had to pay for the time wasted.
But it evens out with the time patients wait to see the doc!
I once had to pay 44 cents for medication. The printing of the bill and electronic payment costs more >
@@MoogieB I don't think so, no.
i can imagine a story based on a society where people pay for things with time and not money. it sounds familiar. is there actually a book like that?
@@kevinlandrini6799 I think there's a movie. With Justin Timberlake. I haven't seen it so I'm not sure but time is a currency of sort. And when you're poor, you run out of time and you die.
The review part it’s so true, I know a doctor who was on trouble for mentioning the patient weight as something unhealthy, there were a lot of bad reviews and even a threat of lawsuit
“Does your doctor have crow’s feet? That means they care ☺️” I can’t stop laughing-
Yeah I thought about CROW FEET not the smile line crow feet
"You owe me half hour of my life back".
I'm so sorry Doc Mike for your loss.
I'll take an half hour over the two hours I spent on the phone with unemployment.
Tell me more about how health insurance companies make our system more efficient.
Addie-Eileen Paige At least you get to call them. They’re not taking calls in my state.
Ah I was just gonna waste it anyways.
I just love how The Onion nails the absurd article headlines so well that there's also a subreddit for similarly absurd stories that AREN'T from The Onion.
@@timothinev9444 r/nottheonion
John 3:16-17 KJV "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved."
@@rezwittkerchester2055 this is the funniest onion article ive read so far
@@rezwittkerchester2055 wrong comment section
I work in an ER and just love Dr Mike. Have told everyone about his videos. Some of our docs watch
When he was talking about plantar warts, I got one on my foot and I had to get it removed by a doctor. Them injecting the numbing agent into my foot was one of the most painful things I've ever experienced it was like fire ran through my veins
2:33 Imagine someone taking this seriously and going to a doctor's office like "So what symptoms do YOU think brought me here today???"
Me, not a doctor, but if I were a doctor: "Good question. I think I'll refer you to a psychiatrist for those symptoms you have..."
Doctor: does it start with A?
I work at a book store and too many times people want me to magically know which book they're talking about. "It had a dog and a sunset on the cover..." And such examples
@@alicehermioneannabeth When you're waitressing and people tell you to bring them something you think they'd like 🙄
Victoria Hatzson lmfaoooo!!!!!!
His voice is soooo satisfying.
I liked and then took it back but only to keep the likes at 100
@@mariejuana8246 DUDE.......
he also LOOKS like one
a dreamy one, tho
Smoke Weed dude stop be nice
When he said that he had a toe remover I was shocked and very surprised that a doctor of all people freezes their toes.
Funny you mention Hx being most important. I remember we had a cardiac pt. Guy was in his 30s and had an MI, believed to be secondary to respiratory distress. Neighbor comes up to Incident commander and informs he's a physician. IC's like "well yeah, get on up there then." I'm in the doorway (I responded with fire, so there's already at least 6 people working on this guy in a LUCAS device, so nothing really for me to do except standby.) and in comes the physician. He's holding the fluids bag up like "so.... Does he have a history of cardiac events?" Needless to say the paramedics weren't really impressed, but it's easy to forget that this physician is probably used to having the entire pt history provided to him. In the field, we rarely get anything close to a complete pt history. We weren't even sure if he'd chocked on food or was potentially on some kind of illicit substance (there was nothing to indicate this on scene) or even a prescribed drug. Our focus is the heart isn't beating. So this physician was very lost in an environment where you act without really knowing what's going on. Not to say a physician shouldn't be on scene. He can approve treatments quickly and has far more experience than the paramedics, but I think everyone gets caught up in "doctor" and doesn't realize that a Doctor in the field can be out of his element, and sometimes can end up in the way.
Poker players: wear dark glasses so they don’t show what card they are actually looking at and the opponent can’t find out their strategy
Also poker players: wear dark reflective glasses showing which cards they have
Me: *facepalm*
Camila Asenia Cejas Perhaps they could have virtual glasses that show opponents false reflectiions?
Don’t touch you face! 😂
@@brittanywoodman6559 virtual facepalm XD
Brittany Woodman too late 😂😂
Ian moseley Smithers bring that man I’m going to make him executive vice-president
"you owe me half an hour of my life back"
YEAH, TELL 'EM😂
I feel that way with a lot of the people I have to deal with at work.
I think they owe him more than tha
I really like my family medicine doc. I’ve been going to him since I was a kid and he’s always available when something comes up.
There is actually good advice hidden in here-I had some excellent doctors as a child (with severe asthma and allergy problems) and as an adult I've realized that the doctors I was fortunate to have as a child are few and far between. Good doctors are rare and wonderful people.
Dr Mike looks like superman? Who agrees?
Pooping is hip. All the cool kids are doing it.
L L • yes
Darth Mucus 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I'm not so sure, but he definitely looks like that guy Clark Kent.
Ugh wow he really does
did u read his think-piece on vigilante justice?
It’s a good thing he doesn’t work in Gotham
Straight up ask your doctor if they’ve ever killed a man on purpose. “Hey doc.. you ever done that to a patient”. Best line ever
Scarier would be, by accident?
"Yes, but just once, and only because he wouldn't stop asking for free Oxy's. It was only a matter of time before he ODed anyway, I just sped things up a bit."
My grandmother was a nurse at Charity Hospital in New Orleans in the 1890s. A child was brought in with rabies. The doctor smothered the child.
@@rk4397: That's awful. But with rabies there really isn't any other option; even with supportive care until the infection subsides, there will be severe lifelong disability.
@@rk4397 ohhhh that's so sad 😞
Love this, please do another!
1:24 I think I had something similar to this for a wart that was on my arm. I remember it having a smell that I can best describe as strange but nice.
Wait how was the medical insurance one on the Onion it's just true! (in the USA at least)
The line between satire and reality gets disturbingly thinner every day.
Because the Ceo admitted it. They would never do that.
"‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens" Sometimes the joke is the honesty.
"Health insurance CEO reveals key to company's success is not paying for customer's medical care"
I think sometimes Onion forgets that they're supposed to be satirical news site, not real news.
The sad part is that most people who buy insurance (of any kind) don't seem to understand that very simple point. They aren't there to help you, they are there to make money first by any means, including screwing you over if they don't think you can fight them.
Nobody's doctor is this young and adorable and fun to be around. It's as incongruous as the super funny and happy mortician or the pretty.and sweet Dr. Pimple Popper!
"the history is the most important part of the exam"....Dealing with a family member's medical emergence in an out of area hospital and they refused to even acknowledge their medical history when I tried to provide it, and they used an antibiotic that they were allergic to. This week has been fun...