People have forgotten that self care can be (and arguably should be) free! Have a big glass of water and then go for a walk in the sunshine. Snuggle with your pet and read a book. Sip on some tea and journal about your day. Watch your comfort show while doing a stretching routine. Listen to music and make your favorite nutritious meal. All of these are more beneficial than to your mental health than a 25 step nighttime routine
Wait 25 steps nighttime skincare, mine have only 4-5 step I probably miss something 🤣 I am so agree with you, I enjoy to do many selfcare things not just apply product in my face. And with the cost of life we need to eat to 😅
@@onimendez7735 exactly, it seems like these people's "self-care" is wasting their life away (and wasting money that could be going into their retirement account instead)
“Lazy girls are ugly” is one of the nastiest quotes I’ve heard in a while. Let’s stop putting other people down. There is nothing ugly about not wanting a ten step expensive skincare routine. Some people have health issues that can stop them from having the best self care, that doesn’t make them ugly.
I've been on this earth for 29 years and the only consumer based self-care I do, is skincare (as in just my face), taking a shower, washing my hair once a week and shaving, which are the more common things people do. And I still secured a man, that I have been with for four years now. To say "lazy girls are ugly" you have to be so insecure with your own appearance. Because at the end that girl is just craving male attention, and frankly it's sad. Not willing to throw money out of the window for unnecessary procedures is not lazy, but being financially smart. Which these girls obviously lack.
@@MrsDaedalus_ 🎯 Financial "health" should be a priority. All the money, waste caused by over-spending and making these companies more wealthy won't help secure a stable financial future.
Just last night was having a lazy night. Whoever made that quote should be lucky I made an effort to remove my makeup with micellar water. Some nights I have more time and energy than others, especially the weeks I have to work in the office.
Some steroids make these cosmetics look cheap. Some guys have spent thousands a month for their gear, and broke students may still spend hundreds. A notorious influencer was exposed last year for spending $15K each month on his enhancements.
People may say they do it for themselves, but if they did not grow up in the world we are in, I highly doubt they would put on a red light mask (or other "self care" tasks) for the fun of it.
Know what else is self care? Living within your means, saving for retirement, knowing your value is more than your physical appearance! Life is more than an accumulation of expired products!
I completely agree, I watch these "self-care" routines and everything showers and they actually look exhausting rather than relaxing. I've seen videos where people do pre-wash body butters (wtf?), two body washes with different wash cloths, body scrubs, shaving, body conditioners (again, wtf?), scalp scrub, shampoo, hair mask, conditioner, body lotion, body oil, body spray... like gurl, ain't nobody got time for all of that.
Gotta remember the context. A lot of this came out of the pandemic and lockdown where there was nothing but time to do all these things. There’s a saying that women have said about caring for the home and kids. They ask husbands - what do you want to look good: the house, the kids or me because you might get two but you’re not getting all three. In the pandemic, there was the most concentration on the home and decor and never ending body care because people didn’t have to go outside and we nested and showed our homes for the first time and we had time and money to take care of ourselves. Now that we’re “back to normal,” focusing on house stuff is a thing of the past in favor of outdoor experiences, traveling, eating out and wearing nice clothes but people are still hooked on all the body stuff that they once had all the time in the world for. New reality ... back to “grinding.” No time for that pandemic “reality.” 🥴
If you use a loofa you automatically exfoliate without adding another product. I don't soak it until right before, I put it under running water just to make the shower gel foam a bit and you don't need an exfoliator that way. Takes the same amount of time. It's fine to take longer showers from time to time, but taking longer ones regularly might trick you into thinking you're unclean if you take a quick one or if you don't shower every day. I get the therapeutic aspect of it, but you really don't need to get a whole body shower everyday, unless you do sports or get dirty and sweaty, at which point it's more understandable than mandatory.
I have POTS so I’m genuinely at risk of passing out while washing my hair, an everything shower for me is as minimal as possible and I still have to plan my week around it
i don't do everything shower, u can do hair shower a night and after 3 days u do shaving and stuff so u don't get tired or u do it next day. but if u are rich as the yt influencers i think u could totally use laser hair removal or monthly waxing
REM sleep really is the most restorative thing we can give our bodies. All the face masks and topical products in the world aren’t going to rejuvenate us from the inside out like good old sleep 😴
It is pretty disappointing to see people on social media shamelessly promoting overconsumption and spending huge amounts of money while our planet is dying and many people live paycheck to paycheck.
Exactly, a lot of beauty and wellness shit thar comes with a lot of packaging, one use applications like masks that are doing nothing.Oh no, wait, they are giving this hyped glow.
honestly- its their money. influencers are paid to do this. either way, the effects of wealth disparity on top of the current economy is not something to blame influencers for.
@@sannidhib7756 I’m not? I’m just saying flaunting a bunch of products that they probably are going to use once or twice and forget about it, is pretty out of touch and also harms our planet when you consume way more than the average person does and even average people (myself included) consume more than we need to. I’m not asking influencers to somehow stop inflation and corporate greed lol
@@jonrian7667 im talking about how influencers are held responsible for harming our planet instead of addressing the exponentially larger carbon footprint of corporations. do u get what i mean? lol
@@sannidhib7756you mean the same corporations that influencers promote when they post unboxings and expensive skin care routines and more overconsumption? Influencers are actively promoting brands and products to get us to buy and consume more. It’s all part of the same problem, do you get what I mean? loll
I also think the rise of bodycare and "hygiene" products is connected to the popularity of the "clean girl" aesthetic (and "glowup" content). Also you're spot on with the "you're dirty" messaging of a lot of hygiene videos :(
It used to be self care was slowing down to take an actual bath, which takes longer than a shower and requires more effort to clean yourself and thus more time is spent on actually caring for yourself...when did it turn into "buy these products for self care!"???? Why do we have to spend so much to just slow down and enjoy private, self-focused time?
GenX here. When I was a teen this stuff was in magazines (Seventeen etc.) with the same "you're broken, you need to buy X, Y, Z and J to fix yourself" tone of writing. Ditto for the "Ladies" magazines that were aimed at an older audience. Nobody with a real job and an actual social life has time for a 3 hour nightly routine (like WTF???), and I look at stuff like these red light masks "now on sale for $699!!!" which is money I could spend on books, eating out with friends, you know ACTUAL self care. My current big self care is learning to play the handpan. Music is sooo relaxing.
My self care is reading, laying in my hammock, watching hummingbirds come to my feeder, playing with my dogs, painting my nails, doing my makeup, which are all essentially free. This is wild, I didn’t know these “self care” videos were so popular!
Me, too. There’s so much to do that’s free or practically free and the makeup/skincare I do have comes from the drug store. All of this spend $50+ per “designer” beauty item stuff with a stash worth thousands of dollars, I don’t understand that. Like I said, my things are from a drugstore chain that closed a store with everything at 75% off, on top of their drug store prices. I get compliments on my makeup and skin all the time. These products work more than fine for me🥰
I'm old enough to remember when self care meant asking my hubby to watch my kids while I took a shower, shaved and maybe read or called my sister. Maybe a run outside. Now we trying to make ourselves happy by buying what everyone else is getting and becoming more narcissistic in the process.
@@jumpingbee4717 wow... what a f'ing ray of black sunshine you are. My husband travelled 3-5 days a week and gladly gave me any time I asked for. Bet you are alone 😂
Every time I start becoming optimistic for our little girls something like this happens where we are calling them dirty for growing their own damn body hair. Thanks for this, Kelly. I hope some young viewers see this.❤
Most "bar soaps" sold for use on the body today are not actually soaps (where ingredients have gone through the soaponification process), but syndets (synthetic detergents) which are usually less harsh on skin. But solid body wash is just another marketing term for these syndet bars that have existed for decades. Liquid/ gel body washes are syndets as well.
My current self care is I’ve hired a workout trainer. I don’t want to do it, I need to do it. Bath bombs and flashy body lotions are self comfort, not self care.
I should be more clear…I’m a big fan of self comfort. I much prefer bubble baths and chocolate over doing the harder work of actual self care. I’m all for self comfort daily but it can be really easy to use it to avoid self care while calling it self care.
Exactly this. Self care is looking after your mental health, setting healthy boundaries, saying no to things & not being pressured into doing them, taking time to relax & recharge. Has zero to do with 3 bags of toiletries & shaving your legs 😂
I would even argue its not a form of self comfort, but instead a way of keeping up with the jones...we see it all over social media, and we think because these people with "perfect" lives have it that must mean if we have it we will have a perfect life too.
Self-care started as a part of treatment for mental health issues, because a lack of BASIC self care (washing, eating good food, going to bed at a decent time, brushing hair, washing care) is very common when our mental health hits crisis points.. Social aspects of life also get dropped - so clients are encouraged to meet a friend, cuddle a pet, leave the house, take a walk. All this is the basic stuff of life. The beauty industry has, in a very calculated way, jumped on this and used it to drive sales and for me its always had the ikk factor
My baby has severe eczema, so slathering him in cerave ointment (plus his prescription ointment) is his skincare routine. I can’t imagine spending money on Dior baby products. 🤣
i just want to point out that maintaining hygiene can be extremely difficult when in a mental health crisis. no amount of products can help that. how can someone be expected to be able to take an everything shower, when even getting out if bed is hard and they can't even bring themselves to brush their teeth? shouldn't the most important part of self care be taking care of our health and not the products? that means understanding mental health and having empathy and compassion. and it's not just abour mental health. I'm chronically ill and physically disabled. I am literally unable to shower every day. showering and bathing are in fact dangerous activities for me because I'm a fainting and falling risk (despite using aids like a shower stool). some days i don't have enough energy and have to choose between eating or showering. I maintain my hygiene in other ways like washcloth/sponge baths on the days when i can't shower. would i like to be able to shower every day and be able to have elaborate routines and pamper myself? sure. but it is literally not possible for me and for many disabled people. constantly raising the standards of hygiene, moving the goal post further and further because of consumerism, is not just bad for the environment and our wallets, it's also ableist and detrimental to many people's health, both physical and mental. edit because i forgot to say this: the sentiment that lazy people are ugly is absolutely vile. and once again, ableist as hell. and incredibly classist too. not everyone can afford both the money or time to have an elaborate routine. these people are so out of touch and have no empathy.
@natgl11 , “Amen!” to everything you’ve stated here. Your comment relates some major truth! 👏🧐👍 If these people only knew how they come across with their nonsense.🙄
I am so grateful social media wasn't around when I was a teen/young adult. Social pressure was bad back in the day. I can't begin to imagine what it's like for young people now 😳😱
This is why I love Kelly’s content. It’s conversations like these that we need so that we don’t go down the rabbit hole of overconsumption. It’s so easy to do.
I feel like... This obsession with bathing and smelling good reminds me of ancient Rome and how those who had wealth indulged in the baths a lot, but it was a social thing too. But the empire was in decline. Government officials were becoming corrupt, and the national budget was going towards military conquests. Do us plebians feel ... Culturally filthy? And so we bathe and perfume ourselves to compensate for some feeling of moral emptiness? Moral poverty? Now this bath bragging is shareable on social media. It's definitely a weird new development that looks new, but feels old. It's a form of flexing on others but gloating about investing in your appearance and cleanliness. It's a form of social currency to communicate status but the focus being on bathing, body dry brushing, exfoliating and shaving really digs deep at this paranoia almost against spiritual rot.
I would love to see a makeup musings video addressing the scarcity mentality of “drops” or “limited edition” products that make the hunt for the product part of the fun- like you’ve really accomplished something and are part of an exclusive group if you got your hands on it.
My thoughts on this is people making content for money. Whatever is getting views is what people are making videos about. In general, social media is to blame. I am usually alone in this opinion, but I see no reason what so ever for kids under the age of 16 to have access to social media. There is so much bad information out there, and they are going to end up paying the price one day. Even my 22 year old is sure all she sees on social media is how people really live, not people creating content as a job and a way to make money.
This!!! Those "relaxing" and "cosy" self care videos we watch, find appealing and then loathe ourself after watching because our self care isn't as aesthetic is all a facade! They had to set the camera before pretending to read a book for 2 minutes, then move the camera to the bathroom, get a shot of the tap, then their face, then dry their hand before moving the camera back again. It's all fake and not as relaxing as it first appears.
My self care is sitting in my sauna or hot tub. I also enjoy journaling. I went to my specialist yesterday. He encouraged me to start yoga and Pilates for my core strength. It is also a great way to wind down at the end of the day.
I’m sorry, perfume for babies? The targeting of younger and younger potential consumers is too much. I get why people are into “self care.” We’re stressed out and this feels like an easy fix to make us feel better. I do it. But these companies are going to keep finding new beauty problems for us to solve, and it just turns into a vicious cycle. And then we end up spending too much money in the process.
As a first time mom of a now 7 month old, I am disgusted by the amount of content telling us how to make our baby grow up faster!! Why can’t we let babies be babies??
Yess!! Just wow. Also, wouldn’t that be extremely disruptive to them? We’re learning more about how disruptive to our hormones that even candles can be, and that scent diffusers can be harmful to our health and our pets’ health, I think that perfume for babies is both unhealthy and asinine. Craziness out there!
Seriously! Why do babies need perfume? They smell so good already! Not to mention the hormone disruptors in perfume that can cause potential life long problems. Terrible idea.
Glad you touched on this! These self care days seem to cost as much as my part of the mortgage. I don't know how anyone who isn't rich or directly profiting from their looks justifies these prices. My body wash costs 3 euros for 2 liters, my self-care is knowing I found a cheap alternative 😂 On a serious note, the overconsumption in social media is really astonishing, and sometimes I worry for the more easily influenced people watching this
Some of this reminds me of the "looksmaxxing" trend that so many young men are doing these days. On the other hand, a lot of this is healthy as long as it's not taken too far and one remains within their financial means. I agree with that, too. I know that I get busy and forget to take better care of myself, so the reminder to take that time is a positive thing. Sure. However, if this has become your entire identity or you're going into debt to purchase all of this? Then, it's a problem. You CAN take care of yourself without having to use luxury products, and it does NOT make you a lesser person. Once you're going down that road...huge problem!
Your outlook in these beauty musing videos (and in general) are such a breath of fresh air! If my daughter was old enough to watch TH-cam your channel is the only one I'd let her watch!😆
The girl saying lazy people are ugly and if you want to be “hot”, you have to do “self care”. Maam, SKIN care is not the same as SELF care, nor do either inherently make you ugly or not 😂 I cannot with the internet
What is heartbreaking is that I know many women are putting their so-called *beauty needs* above the well-being of their own children! Unless one is extremely wealthy, the average person *cannot afford all this.* There is solid research that proves that women who are obsessed with *self-care,* and who seek out one procedure after another are often suffering from significant depression and anxiety. Many who finally leave this fog, admit that they were depressed and that all the procedures and products actually fed into an addiction and obsession. Overspending and neglecting one's loved ones is a sure way to feel progressively empty and sad. The problem is *not our fine lines and imperfect bodies as we all have flaws.* It is the emptiness in the heart. I'm glad you dared to post this, Kelly!
I feel TH-cam started with people who were genuinely interested in makeup/techniques and social media has now collapsed into gross overconsumptiom with quirky names "everything shower ". Ppl doing free ads for beauty companies is freakish Likewise I feel like perfume is being ruined by people just eager to overshop and show off their collection
Self care hauls have gone to the extreme. It's leaning to the side of overconsumption. Which is scary considering how the economy is doing. Not everyone has $150 to splurge on skincare and makeup. People have life issues and prioirtes.
Exhausting instead of refreshing. Stressful because it's expensive. Companies want us to believe if we don't buy their product we must not love ourselves. And at I time I can barely afford my groceries! But you know it does make sense on a way. If you're struggling to afford groceries, you may not want to buy makeup, but everyone has to buy body wash.
This makes me feel old. I remember self care was something simple and easy to pull you out of a dark place. Like drinking a glass of water, taking a day off work, taking a bath, turning off social media, talking to a friend about your problems, enjoying a healthy meal like a salad. Now it’s apparently just because extremely shallow and materialistic. 😂
Also I've been trying to find info for the baby perfume because I could've sworn I heard about people outside the US using it for like, ever. It's popular outside the US so just because we're not accustomed to it, doesn't mean it's inherently bad.
In Latin American countries, they've been using baby perfumes for years [Nenuco]. Even J&J has made a baby perfume in the US since I was an infant, at least. I don't think it's "weird" by any means, if we're defining it as things that are unusual.
"Self care" takes up SO much time. I want to, but I just don't feel like I have time to read, clean, exercise, journal or meditate, stretch, make healthy food, reach out to friends and family, oil pull, scalp and/or body massage, body shower, 10 step skincare routine, all on an everyday or regular basis 😥 and, like you said, can be $$$
Like everything, I think it started from a kernel of truth and has now been turned into a capitalistic monstrosity. As someone with ADHD and anxiety, I have always used showering/washing my hair as a way to calm down. But I don't need to buy 100 products for this activity. That is the opposite of relaxing. I'm moving right now into a smaller place and the amount of 'self-care' products I am throwing away is staggering.
I would love to know how all these young girls can afford all these bougie products. I’m a 51 year old nurse and I can barely afford the occasional bougie product.
“Everything Shower” that’s interesting. I’m 52 and this is something that I have done my entire life. I oftentimes take a rinse off after swimming, working out, to cool off or before bed. But it doesn’t replace my actual shower. And I have always washed and conditioned my hair every day especially if I am going out of the house. It wasn’t until the last 10 years since I have started working from home that I switched to every other day for my hair unless I am going out. I know standards change or maybe it’s just me. I also come from the generation of Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific.
I was literally about to type a comment saying its so weird that self care is directly related to beauty for women and you just started talking about it in the video!!!! You are so right ugh i love your makeup musings so much you are always so real love your content 🫡🫡
I have always used self care as a coping mechanism but it is not the same as getting treatment, i love taking an everything shower and doing my nails but it is not comparable to my medication
This type of "self care" is about catering to the male gaze, when you could spend that time getting your best life. Great video Kelly x, from a 50 year old who lost so much time on this stuff. Now I'm older, wrinklier, and creakier I have a better life than at any time previous, truly, and feel sexier and more relaxed about chin hair and old age etc . Time is the only resource you can't replace Ladies, - what could you achieve for yourselves if you gave yourself back time? And don't forget soap etc. is a relatively recent invention, and men still wanted us without it xx
This is why I follow your channel! Because you analyze and actually stop thinking before giving into these ridiculous trends. Thank you for sharing this, I wanted to clap at every single thing you said, I completely agree!
This is why you’re one of my favourite creators because I never feel like I’m being pushed too intensely to buy something, I can just enjoy makeup and thoughtful conversations. It’s like reading a magazine
Kelly I love how your vids balance fun and more serious topics. Self care for me is affordable talk therapy, going to bed at a reasonable time and trying to eat nutritious food. Extra skincare and makeup are fun additions to my life when I have the money ❤
I feel like with deodorant that it isn't enough just under arms, now you have to douse your "whole smelly self" in deodorant products! I feel like in certain body areas, if you have an odor, you need to go to doctor! Thanks for video!
I tried it when i went camping two weeks. Not the most ideal product for that since it was scented and took up room in my bear vault but i was tired of smelling bad. It sort of worked, at least enough that i wasn't excessively terrible to sit next to on the bus
Morning lap swimming is self care for me as is my skin care and sun care. I've been doing those things for years, but I prefer fragrance-free and and a relatively simple routine for morning and evening. It's very easy to get caught up in using too many products and over exfoliating, which is never fun. But, whether you make or buy your products, finding those magic few ride or die products is amazing! I find sunscreens to be the most expensive product I use regularly. No matter what you use on your face, there are deals out there.
Just recently found this channel and I'm so grateful. I appreciate how while you are a makeup artist, you bring up topics like this. It's quite sad how companies and naive influencers (I don't mean naive in a negative way, more so "uneducated") are promoting materialism as a form of "improving one's mental health. Shopping/overconsumption can be a form of an unhealthy coping mechanism that allows one to ignore and TRULY do the Inner Work.
I like to go for walks & hikes, & I've found reading really helps me a lot, but I will also meditate when I can't do those things. They all allow my brain to process stuff, which then makes me less stressed & scattered. It's hard to not constantly find things to distract yourself with that won't allow your brain to do what' it's supposed to, & that can help degrade your mental health. Also, the beauty industry has long preyed upon people's insecurities - for all genders. They also like to create new insecurities, just to push more products for people to buy - the whole hygiene aspect of beauty has come & gone repeatedly for a very long time now. If you look back at old advertising, it's the same ol' dog & pony show. It's frustrating, & we're all susceptible to it, but it's also not at all new. Just need to be aware of it, so you can try to avoid being so susceptible to it.
I’m 42 and I have to say I love all the self care content! Mainly because I’ve been living that kind of lifestyle for over 20 years and I finally feel on trend! 😂When I was in my 20s, here in the UK there was a huge drinking culture and me with my herbal tea subscription and morning Pilates/ meditation/journalling routine I struggled to find like minded people and even now people think I’m a bit eccentric 😂. I consider my extensive morning and evening routines sacred and they keep in balance mentally. In fact if I’m feeling stressed I lean even more into them and they ground me. I agree there is a huge consumerist element to it but that’s just how I choose to use my own disposable income. I work hard and have no debt so why should I not indulge in things that make me feel good. The videos don’t make me buy certain products but they do inspire me to try a new product when I run out of something or try a new healthy snack that I haven’t seen before. That being said, I was influenced to buy an infrared sauna blanket last year and I think it’s wonderful and was worth every penny… in fact I’m off to meditate in it right now…after I’ve opened the pretty pink soap petals that have just been delivered🤣🥰xx
just wanted to say thank you for these kinds of videos that you do. I think sometimes I feel like I'm crazy, like, "does no one else see what's actually going on?", and then you do a video like this and it makes me feel more sane. knowing we're not alone in seeing how we're being manipulated is also self-care.
❤🎉 Lol well my self-care aka mental health days might just be enjoying Douglas Fairbanks Jr 1930s movies, he was sooo beautiful !! 🥲😊😍❤️🎥 Your musings are spot on, thanks Kelly !! 😊😍🥰
I got my best skin condition since i stopped buying impulsively and started researching information for specific skin problems, not buying things for "glowing up" "clearing up" in general. And i am only watching certified dermatologist's content. I can highly recommend the lab muffin channel, she reviews products very attentively to details and for example she showed that not every retinol is the same, the quality and effects can vary depending on preservatives and stabilizers which were used. Now my skincare is acid toner for pores, retinol, panoxyl for back acne and that's all. If you need a big ritual to relax - you can save money not buying useless skincare and spend it on a good face massage. It s much more effective
Thank you for talking about this! I am 36 and these trends don't get me but I hope your message reaches out the young girls who need to hear that side of the conversation.
This is such an interesting topic. Something I learned about myself in therapy is that some time to myself to do something I enjoy and have routine helps close my stress loop- helps to use anxious energy in another way. You can’t fight a bear or be in flight or flight doing a makeup or skin routine! I think some of these videos are really blown up for the Tik tok and followers. I totally hear you! It’s too much consumerism 😢
Sigh. I’m so tired. Everything is an add/ being sold to me. It’s so exhausting. Everything is so expensive now that I wouldn’t even afford an everything shower 🙃
There’s nothing like a stage 4 cancer diagnosis to give one perspective. My greatest concern with so much of the videos you spoke about, was the prevalence of SELF! The focus on SELF, SELF,SELF! I understand the need to do some self-care, of course. For me, self care is finding things every day that I can be grateful for, taking a short walk thanking God for the breath in my lungs and the ability to walk, spending precious moments with my family, finding someone I can do something for ( because there’s always someone who is going through more than we are). What would happen in this world if we spend a little less time on self care and more time looking at how we can help others, more ways to spend our money to help others than consuming more, more time learning about how we can be a better version of ourselves internally , more time filling our minds with what’s eternal rather than temporal. Beauty and youth are fleeting. These videos are filled with people trying to fill their lives with ‘things/ lengthy self care routines ’ when all the while the vacuum we have in our lives, is a vacuum that only God can fill. Thank you Kelly, for speaking so intelligently about this topic. It should be prescribed viewing for everyone. Love from Australia.❤❤❤
I loved the opening! I only recently started to apply body cream after showering and it made me feel better about my body but this addictional step definitely didn't made any problems of mine disapper. Spending hours for a shower sounds dystopic to me, almost as a wish for everything bad about your life to disappear without taking care of the issue itself
Thank you for this insightful video, Kelly! As a "self-care" creator myself, I often reflect on these things. Interestingly, my most popular video (by a lot) is about walking. I have thought about this over the past several months and I think one of the reasons this topic resonates with people so much is precisely because it does not involve ANY products. It's free. It's accessible. It's a basic human practice. Although TikTok trends make it seem like everyone wants product videos, I've personally found that there's a real hunger for simplicity: for real self-care... which doesn't have to cost a penny. I also believe that self-care is not actually the end goal. Self-care is a means to help us better show up in the world and in our relationships. It's a way that we can feel our best--mentally and physically--so that we can give, contribute, make an impact on society. This video was such a great reminder of the kind of content I want to be creating. thank you 🩷
As a girl who barely uses any makeup products (I don't have time for that)....the "Lazy people are Ugly" sentence really annoyed . Like- why even say something like that?
Im 54 first I get this🤯. Then I get asked all the time what do you do etc. My standard answer is I drink lots of water, use moisturizer less than 5 dollars, sunscreen and lots of good veggies to eat. Taking care from the inside takes care of the outside and it shows. 😉. I love those videos they are meant to be ASMR❤
Thanks for this video. To me self care today is all about how much you spend. The message that if you don’t spend a lot of money and a whole lot of time on a routine, you are ugly is so damaging to kids.
I think it can be good to relax in a hot bath some personal care can be giid, but it's nit going to solve a true mental health problem. The levels of consumerism around it is nuts, but is it much different thsn the over-consumption of makeup that was so popular four or five years ago?
Yes I'm finding that people are buy hauls for there pre-teen like its normal or should be done when I was 10 I litrally only used soup why are we buy anti age for kids??
I used to buy so many body care products to try. Over time my skin has become much more sensitive. I have found what works for me and it's a lot of fragrance free, sensitive skin products like Cetaphil, Cerave, and Eucerin. I have been using up all my products and just buying what serves me best. I don't consider it self care just keeping my dry skin hydrated and un-itchy. I've given up all face masks because I never noticed a difference. I am using up my body sprays and will just have one at a time. Also, now that most companies have taken out parabens, which are good by the way, things go bad much faster. I don't keep backups. When I get near the end I buy a new one.
Your videos are amazing and you are a wonderful, beautiful soul for creating content focused on such topics ! In this day and age when everybody is creating videos trying to sell products (Amazon recs...beauty recs..lifestyle recs...) I love how fresh and wonderfully educative your content is...I almost never comment coz...you know..who cares what one random person on the internet thinks🤷♀ but I just had to THANK YOU for putting in the hard work required to create such inspiring content...I hope you never stop and the Universe continues to bless you :)
People have forgotten that self care can be (and arguably should be) free! Have a big glass of water and then go for a walk in the sunshine. Snuggle with your pet and read a book. Sip on some tea and journal about your day. Watch your comfort show while doing a stretching routine. Listen to music and make your favorite nutritious meal. All of these are more beneficial than to your mental health than a 25 step nighttime routine
💯 agree! And life goes by in the blink of an eye.
AMEN!
Therapist here and I approve this message ✅💕
Wait 25 steps nighttime skincare, mine have only 4-5 step I probably miss something 🤣 I am so agree with you, I enjoy to do many selfcare things not just apply product in my face. And with the cost of life we need to eat to 😅
@@onimendez7735 exactly, it seems like these people's "self-care" is wasting their life away (and wasting money that could be going into their retirement account instead)
“Lazy girls are ugly” is one of the nastiest quotes I’ve heard in a while. Let’s stop putting other people down. There is nothing ugly about not wanting a ten step expensive skincare routine. Some people have health issues that can stop them from having the best self care, that doesn’t make them ugly.
I've been on this earth for 29 years and the only consumer based self-care I do, is skincare (as in just my face), taking a shower, washing my hair once a week and shaving, which are the more common things people do. And I still secured a man, that I have been with for four years now. To say "lazy girls are ugly" you have to be so insecure with your own appearance. Because at the end that girl is just craving male attention, and frankly it's sad. Not willing to throw money out of the window for unnecessary procedures is not lazy, but being financially smart. Which these girls obviously lack.
@@MrsDaedalus_
🎯 Financial "health" should be a priority.
All the money, waste caused by over-spending and making these companies more wealthy won't help secure a stable financial future.
Just last night was having a lazy night. Whoever made that quote should be lucky I made an effort to remove my makeup with micellar water. Some nights I have more time and energy than others, especially the weeks I have to work in the office.
Plus not everyone has time and money to be this vain!!!!
Also, I don’t care about being hot anymore. I am fine being me in my natural state 😂
The ‘you’re not ugly, you’re just poor’ idea has really fed into this too. We feel like if we spend spend spend we will become beautiful.
100% agree
You nailed it 💯
The comparison between men and women’s versions of self care really is eye opening 😮😬
Young men obsess over gym (very pricey) and protein shake (again, pricey) as a mean of self care.
Some steroids make these cosmetics look cheap. Some guys have spent thousands a month for their gear, and broke students may still spend hundreds. A notorious influencer was exposed last year for spending $15K each month on his enhancements.
It’s not self care, it’s vanity and fear of being perceived as unworthy disguised as self care.
People may say they do it for themselves, but if they did not grow up in the world we are in, I highly doubt they would put on a red light mask (or other "self care" tasks) for the fun of it.
Self care for me includes journaling, listening to music, doing my eyeshadow, watching a movie, going for walks, pilates...
I love this. 💖
Yessss ❤I tell my boyfriend all the time doing makeup is free therapy
Know what else is self care? Living within your means, saving for retirement, knowing your value is more than your physical appearance! Life is more than an accumulation of expired products!
I completely agree, I watch these "self-care" routines and everything showers and they actually look exhausting rather than relaxing. I've seen videos where people do pre-wash body butters (wtf?), two body washes with different wash cloths, body scrubs, shaving, body conditioners (again, wtf?), scalp scrub, shampoo, hair mask, conditioner, body lotion, body oil, body spray... like gurl, ain't nobody got time for all of that.
And I thought full body deodorant was outrageous, the industry never ceases to amaze lol
@shironerisilk as a big chested woman who gets boob sweat, I understand the body deodorant.
I'm not watching this kind of content, but any moms having the time to do all this???
@melisaroy6788 I'm not a mom, and I don't have time to do all that. I'm lucky my version of everything showers get done before the hot water runs out.
Gotta remember the context. A lot of this came out of the pandemic and lockdown where there was nothing but time to do all these things. There’s a saying that women have said about caring for the home and kids. They ask husbands - what do you want to look good: the house, the kids or me because you might get two but you’re not getting all three. In the pandemic, there was the most concentration on the home and decor and never ending body care because people didn’t have to go outside and we nested and showed our homes for the first time and we had time and money to take care of ourselves. Now that we’re “back to normal,” focusing on house stuff is a thing of the past in favor of outdoor experiences, traveling, eating out and wearing nice clothes but people are still hooked on all the body stuff that they once had all the time in the world for. New reality ... back to “grinding.” No time for that pandemic “reality.” 🥴
My personal opinion is that an “everything shower” is not an art, it’s a pain to do and I dread it every time 😂
Absolutely
Washing hair and shaving legs in the same session is exhausting.
If you use a loofa you automatically exfoliate without adding another product. I don't soak it until right before, I put it under running water just to make the shower gel foam a bit and you don't need an exfoliator that way. Takes the same amount of time. It's fine to take longer showers from time to time, but taking longer ones regularly might trick you into thinking you're unclean if you take a quick one or if you don't shower every day. I get the therapeutic aspect of it, but you really don't need to get a whole body shower everyday, unless you do sports or get dirty and sweaty, at which point it's more understandable than mandatory.
I have POTS so I’m genuinely at risk of passing out while washing my hair, an everything shower for me is as minimal as possible and I still have to plan my week around it
i don't do everything shower, u can do hair shower a night and after 3 days u do shaving and stuff so u don't get tired or u do it next day. but if u are rich as the yt influencers i think u could totally use laser hair removal or monthly waxing
I always break up my showers/baths as much as possible. One thing at a time😂
My "self care" is sleeping.
Truth.
It‘s very healthy and affordable 🤣
REM sleep really is the most restorative thing we can give our bodies. All the face masks and topical products in the world aren’t going to rejuvenate us from the inside out like good old sleep 😴
Shower, drink water ahah
Sleeping is the best.
It is pretty disappointing to see people on social media shamelessly promoting overconsumption and spending huge amounts of money while our planet is dying and many people live paycheck to paycheck.
Exactly, a lot of beauty and wellness shit thar comes with a lot of packaging, one use applications like masks that are doing nothing.Oh no, wait, they are giving this hyped glow.
honestly- its their money. influencers are paid to do this. either way, the effects of wealth disparity on top of the current economy is not something to blame influencers for.
@@sannidhib7756 I’m not? I’m just saying flaunting a bunch of products that they probably are going to use once or twice and forget about it, is pretty out of touch and also harms our planet when you consume way more than the average person does and even average people (myself included) consume more than we need to. I’m not asking influencers to somehow stop inflation and corporate greed lol
@@jonrian7667 im talking about how influencers are held responsible for harming our planet instead of addressing the exponentially larger carbon footprint of corporations. do u get what i mean? lol
@@sannidhib7756you mean the same corporations that influencers promote when they post unboxings and expensive skin care routines and more overconsumption? Influencers are actively promoting brands and products to get us to buy and consume more. It’s all part of the same problem, do you get what I mean? loll
I also think the rise of bodycare and "hygiene" products is connected to the popularity of the "clean girl" aesthetic (and "glowup" content).
Also you're spot on with the "you're dirty" messaging of a lot of hygiene videos :(
My self-care routine is listening to music, read a good book and then put a black mask over my eyes and go to sleep.
Sleep is the best!
It used to be self care was slowing down to take an actual bath, which takes longer than a shower and requires more effort to clean yourself and thus more time is spent on actually caring for yourself...when did it turn into "buy these products for self care!"???? Why do we have to spend so much to just slow down and enjoy private, self-focused time?
GenX here. When I was a teen this stuff was in magazines (Seventeen etc.) with the same "you're broken, you need to buy X, Y, Z and J to fix yourself" tone of writing. Ditto for the "Ladies" magazines that were aimed at an older audience. Nobody with a real job and an actual social life has time for a 3 hour nightly routine (like WTF???), and I look at stuff like these red light masks "now on sale for $699!!!" which is money I could spend on books, eating out with friends, you know ACTUAL self care.
My current big self care is learning to play the handpan. Music is sooo relaxing.
My self care is reading, laying in my hammock, watching hummingbirds come to my feeder, playing with my dogs, painting my nails, doing my makeup, which are all essentially free. This is wild, I didn’t know these “self care” videos were so popular!
Me, too. There’s so much to do that’s free or practically free and the makeup/skincare I do have comes from the drug store.
All of this spend $50+ per “designer” beauty item stuff with a stash worth thousands of dollars, I don’t understand that. Like I said, my things are from a drugstore chain that closed a store with everything at 75% off, on top of their drug store prices. I get compliments on my makeup and skin all the time. These products work more than fine for me🥰
I'm old enough to remember when self care meant asking my hubby to watch my kids while I took a shower, shaved and maybe read or called my sister. Maybe a run outside. Now we trying to make ourselves happy by buying what everyone else is getting and becoming more narcissistic in the process.
This.
Totally my opinion.
So your self care was a result of your husband not coparenting but being a glorified baby sitter? 😢
@@jumpingbee4717 wow... what a f'ing ray of black sunshine you are. My husband travelled 3-5 days a week and gladly gave me any time I asked for. Bet you are alone 😂
@@Doc2323why did you get angry so easily about her comment? I bet happily married people are more calm😂😂😂
Every time I start becoming optimistic for our little girls something like this happens where we are calling them dirty for growing their own damn body hair. Thanks for this, Kelly. I hope some young viewers see this.❤
i literally had to tell my kids humans will always smell like humans, you dont need to stink but you will not ever smell not like a human lol
This seems more a matter of vanity, not self care
I noticed some of the marketing on hygiene products is changing. I saw a soap advertised as a solid body wash. Isn't that just...bar soap?
Most "bar soaps" sold for use on the body today are not actually soaps (where ingredients have gone through the soaponification process), but syndets (synthetic detergents) which are usually less harsh on skin. But solid body wash is just another marketing term for these syndet bars that have existed for decades. Liquid/ gel body washes are syndets as well.
My current self care is I’ve hired a workout trainer. I don’t want to do it, I need to do it. Bath bombs and flashy body lotions are self comfort, not self care.
Self comfort. That’s it. That’s exactly what it is.
I should be more clear…I’m a big fan of self comfort. I much prefer bubble baths and chocolate over doing the harder work of actual self care. I’m all for self comfort daily but it can be really easy to use it to avoid self care while calling it self care.
Self comfort or beautification !!
Exactly this. Self care is looking after your mental health, setting healthy boundaries, saying no to things & not being pressured into doing them, taking time to relax & recharge. Has zero to do with 3 bags of toiletries & shaving your legs 😂
I would even argue its not a form of self comfort, but instead a way of keeping up with the jones...we see it all over social media, and we think because these people with "perfect" lives have it that must mean if we have it we will have a perfect life too.
Self-care started as a part of treatment for mental health issues, because a lack of BASIC self care (washing, eating good food, going to bed at a decent time, brushing hair, washing care) is very common when our mental health hits crisis points.. Social aspects of life also get dropped - so clients are encouraged to meet a friend, cuddle a pet, leave the house, take a walk. All this is the basic stuff of life.
The beauty industry has, in a very calculated way, jumped on this and used it to drive sales and for me its always had the ikk factor
My baby has severe eczema, so slathering him in cerave ointment (plus his prescription ointment) is his skincare routine. I can’t imagine spending money on Dior baby products. 🤣
Yeah I'm thinking perfume, even with no alcohol, could make a rash worse if the fragrance is sensitizing.
i just want to point out that maintaining hygiene can be extremely difficult when in a mental health crisis. no amount of products can help that. how can someone be expected to be able to take an everything shower, when even getting out if bed is hard and they can't even bring themselves to brush their teeth? shouldn't the most important part of self care be taking care of our health and not the products? that means understanding mental health and having empathy and compassion. and it's not just abour mental health. I'm chronically ill and physically disabled. I am literally unable to shower every day. showering and bathing are in fact dangerous activities for me because I'm a fainting and falling risk (despite using aids like a shower stool). some days i don't have enough energy and have to choose between eating or showering. I maintain my hygiene in other ways like washcloth/sponge baths on the days when i can't shower. would i like to be able to shower every day and be able to have elaborate routines and pamper myself? sure. but it is literally not possible for me and for many disabled people. constantly raising the standards of hygiene, moving the goal post further and further because of consumerism, is not just bad for the environment and our wallets, it's also ableist and detrimental to many people's health, both physical and mental.
edit because i forgot to say this: the sentiment that lazy people are ugly is absolutely vile. and once again, ableist as hell. and incredibly classist too. not everyone can afford both the money or time to have an elaborate routine. these people are so out of touch and have no empathy.
@natgl11 , “Amen!” to everything you’ve stated here. Your comment relates some major truth! 👏🧐👍 If these people only knew how they come across with their nonsense.🙄
I am so grateful social media wasn't around when I was a teen/young adult. Social pressure was bad back in the day. I can't begin to imagine what it's like for young people now 😳😱
This is why I love Kelly’s content. It’s conversations like these that we need so that we don’t go down the rabbit hole of overconsumption. It’s so easy to do.
I feel like... This obsession with bathing and smelling good reminds me of ancient Rome and how those who had wealth indulged in the baths a lot, but it was a social thing too. But the empire was in decline. Government officials were becoming corrupt, and the national budget was going towards military conquests. Do us plebians feel ... Culturally filthy? And so we bathe and perfume ourselves to compensate for some feeling of moral emptiness? Moral poverty? Now this bath bragging is shareable on social media. It's definitely a weird new development that looks new, but feels old. It's a form of flexing on others but gloating about investing in your appearance and cleanliness. It's a form of social currency to communicate status but the focus being on bathing, body dry brushing, exfoliating and shaving really digs deep at this paranoia almost against spiritual rot.
I would love to see a makeup musings video addressing the scarcity mentality of “drops” or “limited edition” products that make the hunt for the product part of the fun- like you’ve really accomplished something and are part of an exclusive group if you got your hands on it.
My thoughts on this is people making content for money. Whatever is getting views is what people are making videos about. In general, social media is to blame. I am usually alone in this opinion, but I see no reason what so ever for kids under the age of 16 to have access to social media. There is so much bad information out there, and they are going to end up paying the price one day. Even my 22 year old is sure all she sees on social media is how people really live, not people creating content as a job and a way to make money.
This!!! Those "relaxing" and "cosy" self care videos we watch, find appealing and then loathe ourself after watching because our self care isn't as aesthetic is all a facade! They had to set the camera before pretending to read a book for 2 minutes, then move the camera to the bathroom, get a shot of the tap, then their face, then dry their hand before moving the camera back again. It's all fake and not as relaxing as it first appears.
My self care is sitting in my sauna or hot tub. I also enjoy journaling. I went to my specialist yesterday. He encouraged me to start yoga and Pilates for my core strength. It is also a great way to wind down at the end of the day.
I’m sorry, perfume for babies? The targeting of younger and younger potential consumers is too much.
I get why people are into “self care.” We’re stressed out and this feels like an easy fix to make us feel better. I do it. But these companies are going to keep finding new beauty problems for us to solve, and it just turns into a vicious cycle. And then we end up spending too much money in the process.
The perfume for babies SHOCKED me hahaha
As a first time mom of a now 7 month old, I am disgusted by the amount of content telling us how to make our baby grow up faster!! Why can’t we let babies be babies??
Yess!! Just wow. Also, wouldn’t that be extremely disruptive to them? We’re learning more about how disruptive to our hormones that even candles can be, and that scent diffusers can be harmful to our health and our pets’ health, I think that perfume for babies is both unhealthy and asinine. Craziness out there!
in Spain is very common to use baby perfume. I've used the same one as my grandma. However is just view as the last step of a shower
Seriously! Why do babies need perfume? They smell so good already! Not to mention the hormone disruptors in perfume that can cause potential life long problems. Terrible idea.
The only zen you find on the mountain is the zen you bring there!!
Love this one! 🤗
Self care for me has been keeping a gratitude journal 😊
I love that!
Glad you touched on this!
These self care days seem to cost as much as my part of the mortgage. I don't know how anyone who isn't rich or directly profiting from their looks justifies these prices.
My body wash costs 3 euros for 2 liters, my self-care is knowing I found a cheap alternative 😂
On a serious note, the overconsumption in social media is really astonishing, and sometimes I worry for the more easily influenced people watching this
honestly we all need to go tf out and stop watching so much crap- it ain’t entertainment anymore it’s just all a big ad
Some of this reminds me of the "looksmaxxing" trend that so many young men are doing these days. On the other hand, a lot of this is healthy as long as it's not taken too far and one remains within their financial means. I agree with that, too. I know that I get busy and forget to take better care of myself, so the reminder to take that time is a positive thing. Sure. However, if this has become your entire identity or you're going into debt to purchase all of this? Then, it's a problem. You CAN take care of yourself without having to use luxury products, and it does NOT make you a lesser person. Once you're going down that road...huge problem!
Your outlook in these beauty musing videos (and in general) are such a breath of fresh air! If my daughter was old enough to watch TH-cam your channel is the only one I'd let her watch!😆
I love having self care days and love watching those kinda videos
The girl saying lazy people are ugly and if you want to be “hot”, you have to do “self care”. Maam, SKIN care is not the same as SELF care, nor do either inherently make you ugly or not 😂 I cannot with the internet
What is heartbreaking is that I know many women are putting their so-called *beauty needs* above the well-being of their own children! Unless one is extremely wealthy, the average person *cannot afford all this.* There is solid research that proves that women who are obsessed with *self-care,* and who seek out one procedure after another are often suffering from significant depression and anxiety. Many who finally leave this fog, admit that they were depressed and that all the procedures and products actually fed into an addiction and obsession. Overspending and neglecting one's loved ones is a sure way to feel progressively empty and sad. The problem is *not our fine lines and imperfect bodies as we all have flaws.* It is the emptiness in the heart. I'm glad you dared to post this, Kelly!
I feel TH-cam started with people who were genuinely interested in makeup/techniques and social media has now collapsed into gross overconsumptiom with quirky names "everything shower ". Ppl doing free ads for beauty companies is freakish
Likewise I feel like perfume is being ruined by people just eager to overshop and show off their collection
Self care hauls have gone to the extreme. It's leaning to the side of overconsumption. Which is scary considering how the economy is doing. Not everyone has $150 to splurge on skincare and makeup. People have life issues and prioirtes.
Exhausting instead of refreshing. Stressful because it's expensive. Companies want us to believe if we don't buy their product we must not love ourselves. And at I time I can barely afford my groceries! But you know it does make sense on a way. If you're struggling to afford groceries, you may not want to buy makeup, but everyone has to buy body wash.
This makes me feel old. I remember self care was something simple and easy to pull you out of a dark place. Like drinking a glass of water, taking a day off work, taking a bath, turning off social media, talking to a friend about your problems, enjoying a healthy meal like a salad. Now it’s apparently just because extremely shallow and materialistic. 😂
Also I've been trying to find info for the baby perfume because I could've sworn I heard about people outside the US using it for like, ever. It's popular outside the US so just because we're not accustomed to it, doesn't mean it's inherently bad.
In Latin American countries, they've been using baby perfumes for years [Nenuco]. Even J&J has made a baby perfume in the US since I was an infant, at least. I don't think it's "weird" by any means, if we're defining it as things that are unusual.
"Self care" takes up SO much time. I want to, but I just don't feel like I have time to read, clean, exercise, journal or meditate, stretch, make healthy food, reach out to friends and family, oil pull, scalp and/or body massage, body shower, 10 step skincare routine, all on an everyday or regular basis 😥 and, like you said, can be $$$
I needed this today❤ being pretty and young does not = a good, happy life.
Like everything, I think it started from a kernel of truth and has now been turned into a capitalistic monstrosity. As someone with ADHD and anxiety, I have always used showering/washing my hair as a way to calm down. But I don't need to buy 100 products for this activity. That is the opposite of relaxing. I'm moving right now into a smaller place and the amount of 'self-care' products I am throwing away is staggering.
I would love to know how all these young girls can afford all these bougie products. I’m a 51 year old nurse and I can barely afford the occasional bougie product.
They get it shipped to them for free since they’re influencers
I think about the time all that crap takes! The dry brushing, red light… takes forecer. I’d rather go on a walk :)
@@numba4ondacourt same!
I love this topic!! Thank you for bringing more attention to the rampant overconsumption.
“Everything Shower” that’s interesting. I’m 52 and this is something that I have done my entire life. I oftentimes take a rinse off after swimming, working out, to cool off or before bed. But it doesn’t replace my actual shower. And I have always washed and conditioned my hair every day especially if I am going out of the house. It wasn’t until the last 10 years since I have started working from home that I switched to every other day for my hair unless I am going out. I know standards change or maybe it’s just me. I also come from the generation of Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific.
Totally agree that there should be more caution around language/messaging considering the primary audience
I was literally about to type a comment saying its so weird that self care is directly related to beauty for women and you just started talking about it in the video!!!! You are so right ugh i love your makeup musings so much you are always so real love your content 🫡🫡
such a wonderful topic, i REALLY like bringing in the mental health with self care. Learned alot :)
I have always used self care as a coping mechanism but it is not the same as getting treatment, i love taking an everything shower and doing my nails but it is not comparable to my medication
This type of "self care" is about catering to the male gaze, when you could spend that time getting your best life. Great video Kelly x, from a 50 year old who lost so much time on this stuff. Now I'm older, wrinklier, and creakier I have a better life than at any time previous, truly, and feel sexier and more relaxed about chin hair and old age etc . Time is the only resource you can't replace Ladies, - what could you achieve for yourselves if you gave yourself back time? And don't forget soap etc. is a relatively recent invention, and men still wanted us without it xx
omg you're so pretty like a little princess or fairy
This is why I follow your channel! Because you analyze and actually stop thinking before giving into these ridiculous trends. Thank you for sharing this, I wanted to clap at every single thing you said, I completely agree!
This is why you’re one of my favourite creators because I never feel like I’m being pushed too intensely to buy something, I can just enjoy makeup and thoughtful conversations. It’s like reading a magazine
Kelly I love how your vids balance fun and more serious topics. Self care for me is affordable talk therapy, going to bed at a reasonable time and trying to eat nutritious food. Extra skincare and makeup are fun additions to my life when I have the money ❤
I feel like with deodorant that it isn't enough just under arms, now you have to douse your "whole smelly self" in deodorant products! I feel like in certain body areas, if you have an odor, you need to go to doctor! Thanks for video!
It’s for excessive sweat around the body
@@wattpadjunkie1133 but they do market it for odor too
I tried it when i went camping two weeks. Not the most ideal product for that since it was scented and took up room in my bear vault but i was tired of smelling bad. It sort of worked, at least enough that i wasn't excessively terrible to sit next to on the bus
@@emilynordt153 lol. Thanks for the info!
Morning lap swimming is self care for me as is my skin care and sun care. I've been doing those things for years, but I prefer fragrance-free and and a relatively simple routine for morning and evening. It's very easy to get caught up in using too many products and over exfoliating, which is never fun. But, whether you make or buy your products, finding those magic few ride or die products is amazing! I find sunscreens to be the most expensive product I use regularly. No matter what you use on your face, there are deals out there.
Self care is a private personal ritual and should not be a “look at me” attention social media grab
Just recently found this channel and I'm so grateful. I appreciate how while you are a makeup artist, you bring up topics like this.
It's quite sad how companies and naive influencers (I don't mean naive in a negative way, more so "uneducated") are promoting materialism as a form of "improving one's mental health.
Shopping/overconsumption can be a form of an unhealthy coping mechanism that allows one to ignore and TRULY do the Inner Work.
I like to go for walks & hikes, & I've found reading really helps me a lot, but I will also meditate when I can't do those things. They all allow my brain to process stuff, which then makes me less stressed & scattered. It's hard to not constantly find things to distract yourself with that won't allow your brain to do what' it's supposed to, & that can help degrade your mental health.
Also, the beauty industry has long preyed upon people's insecurities - for all genders. They also like to create new insecurities, just to push more products for people to buy - the whole hygiene aspect of beauty has come & gone repeatedly for a very long time now. If you look back at old advertising, it's the same ol' dog & pony show. It's frustrating, & we're all susceptible to it, but it's also not at all new. Just need to be aware of it, so you can try to avoid being so susceptible to it.
I’m 42 and I have to say I love all the self care content! Mainly because I’ve been living that kind of lifestyle for over 20 years and I finally feel on trend! 😂When I was in my 20s, here in the UK there was a huge drinking culture and me with my herbal tea subscription and morning Pilates/ meditation/journalling routine I struggled to find like minded people and even now people think I’m a bit eccentric 😂. I consider my extensive morning and evening routines sacred and they keep in balance mentally. In fact if I’m feeling stressed I lean even more into them and they ground me. I agree there is a huge consumerist element to it but that’s just how I choose to use my own disposable income. I work hard and have no debt so why should I not indulge in things that make me feel good. The videos don’t make me buy certain products but they do inspire me to try a new product when I run out of something or try a new healthy snack that I haven’t seen before. That being said, I was influenced to buy an infrared sauna blanket last year and I think it’s wonderful and was worth every penny… in fact I’m off to meditate in it right now…after I’ve opened the pretty pink soap petals that have just been delivered🤣🥰xx
Are u going to make a video about the “underconsumption” trend? Even tho it’s actually just normal consumption? Love for you to do that!
just wanted to say thank you for these kinds of videos that you do. I think sometimes I feel like I'm crazy, like, "does no one else see what's actually going on?", and then you do a video like this and it makes me feel more sane. knowing we're not alone in seeing how we're being manipulated is also self-care.
❤🎉 Lol well my self-care aka mental health days might just be enjoying Douglas Fairbanks Jr 1930s movies, he was sooo beautiful !! 🥲😊😍❤️🎥
Your musings are spot on, thanks Kelly !! 😊😍🥰
I got my best skin condition since i stopped buying impulsively and started researching information for specific skin problems, not buying things for "glowing up" "clearing up" in general. And i am only watching certified dermatologist's content. I can highly recommend the lab muffin channel, she reviews products very attentively to details and for example she showed that not every retinol is the same, the quality and effects can vary depending on preservatives and stabilizers which were used. Now my skincare is acid toner for pores, retinol, panoxyl for back acne and that's all. If you need a big ritual to relax - you can save money not buying useless skincare and spend it on a good face massage. It s much more effective
Thank you for talking about this!
I am 36 and these trends don't get me but I hope your message reaches out the young girls who need to hear that side of the conversation.
This is such an interesting topic. Something I learned about myself in therapy is that some time to myself to do something I enjoy and have routine helps close my stress loop- helps to use anxious energy in another way. You can’t fight a bear or be in flight or flight doing a makeup or skin routine! I think some of these videos are really blown up for the Tik tok and followers. I totally hear you! It’s too much consumerism 😢
Sigh. I’m so tired. Everything is an add/ being sold to me. It’s so exhausting. Everything is so expensive now that I wouldn’t even afford an everything shower 🙃
Great topic and such an important message! Kudos to you for tackling this issue.
As always, love your video, Kelly!!
There’s nothing like a stage 4 cancer diagnosis to give one perspective. My greatest concern with so much of the videos you spoke about, was the prevalence of SELF! The focus on SELF, SELF,SELF! I understand the need to do some self-care, of course. For me, self care is finding things every day that I can be grateful for, taking a short walk thanking God for the breath in my lungs and the ability to walk, spending precious moments with my family, finding someone I can do something for ( because there’s always someone who is going through more than we are). What would happen in this world if we spend a little less time on self care and more time looking at how we can help others, more ways to spend our money to help others than consuming more, more time learning about how we can be a better version of ourselves internally , more time filling our minds with what’s eternal rather than temporal. Beauty and youth are fleeting. These videos are filled with people trying to fill their lives with ‘things/ lengthy self care routines ’ when all the while the vacuum we have in our lives, is a vacuum that only God can fill. Thank you Kelly, for speaking so intelligently about this topic. It should be prescribed viewing for everyone. Love from Australia.❤❤❤
Your makeup musings are so well thought out. It's clear you put a lot of effort into them. I really like watching them.
Self care in the form of consumption can be so detrimental for so many people too and no one really talks about that
I loved the opening! I only recently started to apply body cream after showering and it made me feel better about my body but this addictional step definitely didn't made any problems of mine disapper.
Spending hours for a shower sounds dystopic to me, almost as a wish for everything bad about your life to disappear without taking care of the issue itself
Thank you for this insightful video, Kelly! As a "self-care" creator myself, I often reflect on these things. Interestingly, my most popular video (by a lot) is about walking. I have thought about this over the past several months and I think one of the reasons this topic resonates with people so much is precisely because it does not involve ANY products. It's free. It's accessible. It's a basic human practice.
Although TikTok trends make it seem like everyone wants product videos, I've personally found that there's a real hunger for simplicity: for real self-care... which doesn't have to cost a penny. I also believe that self-care is not actually the end goal. Self-care is a means to help us better show up in the world and in our relationships. It's a way that we can feel our best--mentally and physically--so that we can give, contribute, make an impact on society.
This video was such a great reminder of the kind of content I want to be creating. thank you 🩷
I love that you cover important topics like this and even more, how you cover them. Appreciate the thoughtful and intelligent content, friend.
Great video as always I love the stats the research the perspectives I wish your girls 13 14 etc would follow and listen to you ❤❤
Thanks for speaking up on these topics…and for spreading the awareness. This is the reason why I continuously follow you…😊
As a girl who barely uses any makeup products (I don't have time for that)....the "Lazy people are Ugly" sentence really annoyed . Like- why even say something like that?
Kelly, you really killed it in this video. I have really enjoyed your thoughtful chats about the industry and larger topics ❤
My jaw dropped at the Dior baby perfume. I had no idea. I am not surprised, though. Day-um.
Same didn't know that was a thing.
Thanks for the upload!!
Im 54 first I get this🤯. Then I get asked all the time what do you do etc. My standard answer is I drink lots of water, use moisturizer less than 5 dollars, sunscreen and lots of good veggies to eat. Taking care from the inside takes care of the outside and it shows. 😉. I love those videos they are meant to be ASMR❤
Absolutely love your Musings series!
I love this video! Please keep shedding light on these issues! People need to hear this.
Thanks for this video. To me self care today is all about how much you spend. The message that if you don’t spend a lot of money and a whole lot of time on a routine, you are ugly is so damaging to kids.
I think it can be good to relax in a hot bath some personal care can be giid, but it's nit going to solve a true mental health problem. The levels of consumerism around it is nuts, but is it much different thsn the over-consumption of makeup that was so popular four or five years ago?
One cream is enough to take care of yourself no one needs all these creams
Yes I'm finding that people are buy hauls for there pre-teen like its normal or should be done when I was 10 I litrally only used soup why are we buy anti age for kids??
oh my god, yes! these trends keep telling us, women, that we aren't beautiful enough and they just add more insecurities for us to worry about
Nice video, I totally get it! Makes sense to go to body products since the makeup and facial care industries are so saturated.
Even though this is half my TikTok feed I completely agree and enjoyed your discussion of it. 😂🥰
I used to buy so many body care products to try. Over time my skin has become much more sensitive. I have found what works for me and it's a lot of fragrance free, sensitive skin products like Cetaphil, Cerave, and Eucerin. I have been using up all my products and just buying what serves me best. I don't consider it self care just keeping my dry skin hydrated and un-itchy. I've given up all face masks because I never noticed a difference. I am using up my body sprays and will just have one at a time. Also, now that most companies have taken out parabens, which are good by the way, things go bad much faster. I don't keep backups. When I get near the end I buy a new one.
Your videos are amazing and you are a wonderful, beautiful soul for creating content focused on such topics ! In this day and age when everybody is creating videos trying to sell products (Amazon recs...beauty recs..lifestyle recs...) I love how fresh and wonderfully educative your content is...I almost never comment coz...you know..who cares what one random person on the internet thinks🤷♀ but I just had to THANK YOU for putting in the hard work required to create such inspiring content...I hope you never stop and the Universe continues to bless you :)