This Is The Science Behind Grieving with David Kessler

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ธ.ค. 2022
  • Watch David Kessler’s full course Help For The Hurting Heart
    Watch 100+ other courses from top wellness teachers by trying Commune free for 14 days:
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    The way you feel today doesn't have to be how you feel always.
    Your mind is wired to protect you from repeating pain.
    It’s natural and common to worry after loss.
    You are learning how to live in this new world.
    In this lesson, you’ll learn about the science of loss. And how the programming of your mind creates repetitive thoughts that become pathways in the brain. Case in point: If you repeat a story enough times, it becomes deeply grooved in your mind, as natural and unconscious as a breath. It becomes the default way you think about what happened. The good news is you can reprogram your mind, by unspooling those stories that keep you in pain and creating new ones that support you growing through the grief.
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ความคิดเห็น • 38

  • @peteporcelli2346
    @peteporcelli2346 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I watched my wife take her last breath 45 days ago. This video is good for me

  • @michelezelenak5639
    @michelezelenak5639 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I lost my son also! Seems like yesterday and the pain is still there! God Bless you and thank you.

  • @pattynun1490
    @pattynun1490 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you David.

  • @BrendaPhillips09
    @BrendaPhillips09 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The worst did happen to me again while I was still in deep grief.

  • @barbarayoder9107
    @barbarayoder9107 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you so much, Mr. Kessler, for sharing this information with people free of charge. It is very kind of you.

  • @joannedobkin3363
    @joannedobkin3363 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    I happen to love that show “love it or list it” I personally rent a place for the past 10 years. My mother passed away and I wasn’t given a choice my brother in law sold my childhood home at a half price with all the personal contents inside. I went to see from the street and my parents home they worked so hard to build they tore down the front stairs but kept the rest of the house intact. I used to sit on those stairs while my dad ate watermelon and spit out pits. I haven’t recovered from the loss of my mom. I alone sat by her casket the youngest of 5 children the siblings exist they just couldn’t be bothered. 😢 I cry almost everyday. My mom was the best. A part of me died with her that day and her death was on my son’s birthday.

  • @kerryfoster1
    @kerryfoster1 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Yes I have so many thoughts of the good times long before she died which is good.
    However the images of her deterioration in a hospital bed also haunt me. The sadness of witnessing that is overwhelming too.

  • @J.Wade87
    @J.Wade87 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    You're a good man Mr. Kessler. I lost my Dad 7 days ago and your videos have meant more to me than I can explain. They truly have been a gift in a society where grief is almost taboo. "You're hurting? Well you should talk to someone, as long as it isn't me." Perhaps losing him has made me see this, and will make me change how I treat others in their grief. Thank you again.

    • @donnagray7896
      @donnagray7896 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I am so sorry for the recent loss of your Dad. Gentle hug to you.

    • @Bloom2Grow
      @Bloom2Grow 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I feel you…I just lost my dad almost two weeks ago…hurts!!!!

    • @J.Wade87
      @J.Wade87 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@donnagray7896 thank you, I'm healing well! I still miss him like crazy of course but it does get easier.

    • @L6FT
      @L6FT 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@J.Wade87 It gets better. The grief is an inverse proportion to the love you feel, and maybe there are a lot of unsettled things as well.
      It's tough work of going through it all, which takes energy, so it's like a job, but worth going through.
      I understand what you mean, when we feel most down it can be lonely, since most people may not have experienced the deep emotions enough to be present. It's like walking through the valley of the dead. The bright side of it is your experience may make you empathise better with people in their grief.
      I find it helps to talk with someone trustworthy and present. I might suggested friends, the ACA network, or perhaps church groups.
      All the best to you.

  • @z0rak
    @z0rak ปีที่แล้ว +4

    It's really obvious that you know what you're talking about and you speak with passion. Thank you for this video. No I'm not going through grief at the moment, I can relate to a lot of what you are talking about because it's at the root of stoicism. "You have power over your mind not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength." "The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts."

  • @L6FT
    @L6FT 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    After my ex cheated and left I keep reliving the trauma moment when my emotions collapsed.
    I've tried mending things and keep going over regrets, what I should've done or not. I keep realising deeper levels and hurt and insights all the time.
    In many ways I feel like I'm a better and more insightful person than I was a year ago. I just wish my hurt would soon stop and I can feel happy and free again.

    • @Lemoncare
      @Lemoncare 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I appreciate your post. I’m dealing with sorrow, after abandonment.
      It hurts.

    • @L6FT
      @L6FT 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@Lemoncare I recently started the daily practice, presented by Anna Runkle -The Crappy Childhood Fairy. I've noticed it helps stating my fears and resentments, and asking for them to be released. Not that they aren't still there, but part of the emotional edge and loop thinking has been taken off.
      We carry a lot of bagage in our lives and sometimes something happens to tip us off, where we then have the challenge to uncover all layers of ourselves and find the compassion and dignity within.
      I wish you strength, curiosity and perseverance in your journey towards a better you.

    • @Lemoncare
      @Lemoncare 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@L6FT thank you for the kind words.
      Yes, listing our fears, and pray god take them away, is helpful.
      Trauma is a time traveler.
      I will support myself. I am sending you a warm hug. ( it’s been very unlike me to even share) I will keep my heart open to good ness. Good people and new beginnings.

  • @harrietgallant5032
    @harrietgallant5032 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    We have no control over our thoughts- they come and go , like clouds in the sky. Conscious breathing is my anchor. Focus your mind on other things but also at times give your mind time to work things out. Get physical exercise because our thoughts work themselves out of our body through movement. This is particularly important to move Grief through and out of your body. Prayer in any sense, to whoever you pray to is a wonderful conduit release those worries and let them go and give yourself trustfully to the Universe.

    • @lisaparker958
      @lisaparker958 ปีที่แล้ว

      00o⁹

    • @walkaminutewithme4787
      @walkaminutewithme4787 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank You ❤😊

    • @timgray950
      @timgray950 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      So true. To anyone who doesn’t believe this, just try to choose the next thought that comes into consciousness.

  • @marjanzijlstra1873
    @marjanzijlstra1873 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for telling about grief. It helps me a lot. I lost my son 4 years ago. He was 42 years old en he has suffering six years from a braintumor. You tell how people can go on after a loss. Thank you!

  • @S.H.A.D.O.999
    @S.H.A.D.O.999 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    This was so helpful to me...
    I lost a best friend suddenly 2 days ago...

  • @Tamizsaelvi
    @Tamizsaelvi 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I am a fan of your books which I read twice .Seeing you doubles up my respect on you. You are an ANCHOR on my grief journey after my son Nithin s sudden loss . Thank you being the beacon on my dark path.

  • @deutscherfischer55
    @deutscherfischer55 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my father’s death. This couldn’t have come at a better time. Thanks you

  • @amytangerine
    @amytangerine ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thanks for all of your insight and wisdom. It has helped in my healing tremendously.

  • @dezzif
    @dezzif ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much

  • @sarahking9475
    @sarahking9475 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    First video of the day. Thank you so very much.

  • @peachpotter
    @peachpotter 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    But you didn’t change your thoughts, it was an external suggestion made to you, not by you. So therefore to change your own thoughts would require another transmitter because the one you already have only plays to you on the one frequency.

  • @cynthiawalsh262
    @cynthiawalsh262 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you - you are so good and point on - we truly have control for a “TeamHealth” pathway - what was your best moment today? What are you doing for optimal health? ❤How present & kind are those in your life? Including you!!!

  • @jennebeattie3168
    @jennebeattie3168 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What is the road that spirals you down 11:56

  • @victoriaoshea4865
    @victoriaoshea4865 หลายเดือนก่อน

    11:05

  • @glory1star
    @glory1star ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That’s make sense when we don’t worry death sneak upon us 😢
    I worried about my daughter 1000’s but soon as I was ok with her being gone away to college she got killed by a teen driver whom stole a car that hit her and her roommate in a crosswalk on campus!
    Why God 😭😭😭

    • @walkaminutewithme4787
      @walkaminutewithme4787 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm so sorry 😢❤ 🙏

    • @glory1star
      @glory1star ปีที่แล้ว

      @@walkaminutewithme4787 Thank You 😊 🫶🏾💜