listen to me. listen. im turning 29 soon. your early 20's are NOT the shape the rest of your life will be. like, the pandemic completelly destroying my previous career aside, i eneded up going back to uni after a year out to open up more opportunities for myself. that moved into me going into volunteering, going into freelance work, going into a bunch of super amazing projects, then getting part-time work in something that was NOT my field of study. the trajectory of my life completely changed in the 7 years since i graduated my BA. and yeah i DO have friends who got married, have kids, have a house (literally how??? the economy is in shambles), but i know a stack of other people who are in shared rentals, living with parents, some who came out of shitty situations directly into another shitty situation. we aren't all handed the same cards and comparing yourself to others literally is not going to do anything for you. you gotta do you. and yeah the adults around you are getting older. my nan turned 81 yesterday. even the kids are older - my cousin is 18??? i remember him being brand new born. the passage of time is inescapable. but you cant be afraid of it and decide your now is your forever, or convince yourself that you're like...elderly. your 20s are for your cringefail stumbling around figuring shit you. idk about you dweebs but i cant WAIT to be a hot and funny 32 year old
This is good advice that I should listen to since I do caught myself obsessing on how I'm progressing or reaching my goals at 21 years old or how I know parents will pass away one day due to just time but I shouldn't be dwelling too much and instead do want I can today. A friend of mine always says I think too much in the future, but I don't focus on the present.
I'm 26 and your comment is inspiring!! And I also can't wait to be a hot and funny 32 year old 😁I actually think my smile lines are flattering and I'm proud of my gray hairs 😁
I'm 22 and one thing even weirder than having your former classmates getting married is having your former classmates dying. 7 people I knew died last year, it's wild. (+ 2 other people that I didn't know who were my age and went to my high school)
@@edithmacpherson-kp1jn This whole time I was worried about my grandma dying. I never thought my best friend would die first. I celebrated my grandma's 101st birthday 2 days after my 22yo friend's funeral, like huh?? Like, what have we even done in our lives until today? They just went to school and died ☠️ its crazy bro
When I was 23, my mom died. 6 years prior, my dad died. I'm almost 26 yrs, and I still relate to all of this. Having no parents is scary, you constantly feel like you're stumbling. Probably the hardest part of all, is recognising no one else in the world will love you unconditionally or on par to that, as a parent does. Definitely cherish the times you have, take them to places they wanted to go to, laugh at their goofy jokes, understand that age can add to mood, rest is good for them and be happy to have them. Life is really short, it's what makes it sweet x
That must have been hard to experience at such a young age. You sound like you've grown a lot to be able to think this way about these experiences. I am 29 myself, and I lost my mother recently. I feel the way you describe: scared, sort of lost, and stumbling through life. I still have my dad but our relationship is strained because he used to verbally abuse me when I was a kid, so it doesn't feel the same as the relationship I had with my mom. She really accepted me. It's hard to think that I'll never be able to embrace her again and that I won't be able to share my future life experiences with her from this point onward...
@@a.b.9830 I'm so sorry for your loss and in the most human way possible, I wish I could offer a hug. It's nice to hear you had a good relationship with your mom but I understand that it makes it so much more painful. Take things easy, slow down your life a bit would be my advice. Sometimes during these experiences we can do things or be things we wouldn't usually - and sometimes that's a good thing too. Taking time to figure it out, process is important. The lost feeling is odd, it's difficult to explain to people who haven't experienced it. Reaching out to other family, friends, joining a club or just getting out and about is key. My mom died during covid and it was very difficult to be isolated and exist in grief. Nothing will fully repair your broken heart but I hope that it heals as much as it can. Keep strong x
I love your comment and I'm so grateful that you shared from your unique perspective 🫶🏻 you're awesome and I'm so sorry your parents are no longer here
I just turned 20 last week:) I’m a 16 year old teenage girl in my head still. But I’m forced to work full time, it’s terrible 😂😭I’m exhausted. economy sucks, living on your own is so expensive and stressful
being in university (or in the workforce) can be hard but every stage of life has easy and hard parts. you’ll lose some of the luxuries you’re used to but you’ll gain new ones. things will get better
I’ll be 29 in a couple months. My twenties have been rough inwardly, an extension of my adolescence. I think by 25 I felt different. I felt a maturity that is hard to describe. It’s like adulthood happened to me whether I pursued it or not. After that it was a few years of seriously fighting with myself to fix the mess I had grown up to be. I feel remarkably okay now. All my struggles are still there, but they do not consume me. All I can advise is to persevere. Keep pushing through the hard stuff, it’s far worse not to.
I'm only 17 but work is kind of draining my joy out of life. Like I actually feel so tired I could fall asleep right there about 4-5 hours into every single shift People complain about school but school is my weekend
Honestly, the thought of having to live like this for the next possibly 50 years is soul sucking. Aint no way i could manage as one of those self sufficient folks but good god i wish i could
10 years ago I was 17. All I can say is try and enjoy as much as you can. As much as you can push pass the anxiety, timidy and insecurity. It just chains you down and haunts you with regret of what could have been but will never be.
This vid has me crying, I lost my mom and don’t know much about my dad but I’ve had to accept I they wont grow with me. I’m 18 and watching my brother do all this adult things makes me so scared and nervous of the next birthdays, but then again it also makes me feel better bc he overcomes so many obstacles by himself. Makes me feel like I have a chance
Just be careful, though. Being able to overcome things on your own may make you reluctant to ask for help once you are out of your depth because you just get used to figuring it out on your own. I am one of those people.
Currently 24 and reached a point where I am entering the stage of navigating my path and realizing how powerful but also scary that I can make my own decisions. Really resonated and enjoyed the part in the video where you went in depth about growing up and the consequences that our younger selves caused our parents back then.
its such an unfortunate, daunting feeling when you see your parents getting older and realizing one day theyll pass. i think the best thing to do is stop taking them for granted and spend time with them now
Not me taking a personal day today bc I just can’t. I saw a sign Sunday that said it’s ok to rest and then our all staff meeting we were talking about listening to our body. I would say taking strategic time off/unpaid time off is always necessary. It feels good to focus on ourself and listen to ourselves. We have an impact in everything we do. It should be and feel enough. Hoping you’re all taking care of yourselves 💓
I'm A Middle-Millenial & When I Was A Young Man In My Late Teens & Early 20's, We Were Just Coming Out Of The 2008 Recession & A Government Shutdown In The Early 2010's. It Was Hell Back Then. 💯 I'm In My Mid-30's Now, I Pray For Gen-Z Because The Economy Is Far Worse Now Than It Ever Was Back Then! 🙏The Millennials Are Becoming Grandparents Now. 💯
My dad was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year. I am 24. He will probably be gone within a decade. He was almost done with his job and was going to retire in a couple years, but had to retire this year. And this was after my mother broke her hip before Christmas. Shit sucks, dude. But I'm happy I have my girlfriend with me. Makes me feel less alone. Love your family, bro. Life can take them whenever it wants to.
I started working right out of high school because I was delusional enough to think I could live comfortably off 10 dollars an hour and eventually on a part-time income forced on me by my chronic illness. Then I started romanticizing school again after a few years because reality hit and I decided to finally take advantage of my job's college financial aid program. Now I can confidently say they both are sucking the light out of me so I'm currently starting a crochet plushie business on the side to keep myself sane-ish😭✌
i don’t always think about talking about my parents and discussing their will but every now and then it does come to mind how it would be when they won’t be there anymore. just now when you mentioned it in your video, i started to think about it some more and it’s quite scary to imagine them not being there anymore damn. my dad half jokingly told me that when he dies, he doesn’t want any sad faces on his funeral, he wants his funeral to be a party kind of lol and sometimes i still think how i’m gonna have to pull that off? if i were able to manage all of that, i’ll prolly be dancing with tears in my eyes
Y'all are right, one day we won't rely on our parents and that's why it's so important to remember that we all have to take care of each other. Sometimes we all need help and we should take the time to help each other, even if it's just a stranger in the grocery store. It won't be the same, but it can still be good.
I'm 25 and relate!!! Trying to do my taxes after starting to work for myself (graduated college during covid and it totally took me in another direction), trying not to compare myself to others who are making more money, buying a house, etc... and my parents are getting ready to sell my childhood home that holds so many good memories - I am very attached to it :( and the parents getting older thing.... relate hard to that too. Change is always so weird, and in our twenties, it seems like there is change happening constantly!!! I do wish there were courses on how to do taxes and more adult things.... they kinda just threw us into it
I'm obviously pretty late to the train of commenting my experiences on this video but I gotta say, my entire life has always felt like catch-up. At this point, it feels like I'm only going to start living my(stable) life in my late thirties, at the earliest. I'm figuring and dealing with my entire life all by myself more or less. Then I look around at everyone else and it feels like everyone else has supportive family, friends, professional contacts, support systems(both in family and friends and social supports of any kind). The implication here is that I have none of those things. No one ever tells you how hard life is going to be growing up, but also no one tells you how hard life is if you're going at it completely alone. Before anyone comments acting like it's 100% my fault, I had a pretty awful and damaging upbringing that stunted so many aspects of my life, I'm still trying to catch up and eventually feel like a normal person that people actually want to be around and sometimes it honestly feels like I'm the only person. I can't even say I'm exaggerating either. I think the reason why "the 30s are the new 20s" is becoming more popular as a saying(at least in my experience) is becomes in the last few decades, there's been a few generations who have had to go through the experience of lagging behind and only getting to *begin* enjoying their lives by their 30s.
I'm 14 (turning 15 this year) I always get stressed out about future and what will my job be or if I will like it, specially when I am growing up in a family where almost every adult expresses how much they hate working. Even though my 20s are pretty far, I really liked this video, for me it felt like getting advice from an older sister =)
It was wild to not be part of the kids going back to school after summer. Pretty sure i dreamt about going to my high school wondering wtf i was doing there because i already graduated...😅
Ugh it’s the life shit adding up. I remember I was was on FaceTime with my sister, her boyfriend was getting sick in the other room, I hear him shout “hey babe?” Her: “yeah?” Him: “can you bring me my phone? I need to reschedule our grocery delivery next week since we’re on the road Sunday.” Her: “for sure!” And then he did it between rounds of getting sick. Her (to me): “isn’t life after college glamorous?” Jfc
I really felt this a lot. I’m 19, turning 20 in a month. I’ve been working for over a year. I moved into an apartment at the start of the year. It feels like there’s no going forward from here, like this is all there is for the next 60 years until I die. It’s been so hard grappling with the fact that I’m not going to be a teenager anymore, but I hardly feel like anything more than a kid. I have no idea what’s going on and everyday is just waiting for my next day off so I can rot in bed for more time than usual. I even fucking miss high school. At least it was a little different every day and some activities were fun, and I didn’t have to worry about taking care of myself. I just want to play outside with my toys and go to school and have dinner at my friends house I don’t want to be stuck like this forever. Anyways yeah. Good video
20s-30s are early in life and since we all live our lives in our own timeline/pace, just focus on doing your own thing. as long as you’re alive that’s all that matters
When I tell people I am excited to be in my 30s, they are shocked. But after fighting through hell that was my early and mid-20s and finally finding my footing, I feel like I am entering my hot girl era. Yeah I still live in shared housing with roommates and live paycheck to paycheck, my frontal lobe is finally fully formed and things make a lot more sense.
I don’t want to grow up 😭 currently 14 turning 15 in a few days and I’m scared that I’ll leave so much regrets that I’ll blame myself for in the future when I’m older. I don’t want to lose everything right now as a kid 😞
I had early access to my 20's at 16 which was like a year or so after I dropped out of school, that was almost a decade ago and I've had several jobs since then
That part about not spending time with your parents really hit home. I'm getting close to the end of mt junior year of high school and now that I think about it, I really wish I said yes more to when my mom would ask me to go do stuff with her. I guess it's because I see her everyday that I don't think about how our window of time together is closing so I reject her cause "there's always tomorrow". I don't feel this way towards my dad though because I hardly ever see him so I never reject his offers to hang out but idk. I'm more worried about not being around enough with my mom especially since she's turning 53 this month and I'm only 16 :c I'm so scared she won't be around when I finish med school like she's always supported me on pursuing 😭 time is really so precious
i graduate in a year. thinking about having a full time job makes me feel like the only sustainable option is to kill myself. i don’t know how i’ll do it, but emily your videos are one joy in the day!
o18+ adulthood is always way different than what is expecting. For me, i had to work 14 hours per day. Damn... i guess i learnt how to dance while everything is falling apart. Yes, i could not study, obviously xD!
Hahaha I know how it feels to see many acquitances/mate with whom you grew with getting married 😂 It makes feel old or late... (Fortunately?) most of my friends are still looking for or even never have any girlfriend so it makes me feel normal
I just turned 41, and everything you're saying is 100% on point. Your early 20s are the tail-end of puberty and adolesce. You've had very little work experience (save for those who had jobs in their early to mid teens) and are expected to jump in and perform seamlessly. Your early 20s are a complete mess, a disaster, a thing to be fought through and learned from, and can be pretty miserable. By your mid 20s, things are evening out. Thirty looms, passes while you lament the fact, and before you know it, you're 33 and things are ... Good? Nice? You do the unpleasant things (phone calls to insurance agents 😵) with hardly a second thought. You often have the option for free time. Your twenties ARE rough, but there is so much life ahead, and it is phenomenal. Yourh is held up as this thing you "have" then "lose", but no one seems to mention that you gain so much more: knowledge, connections, financial and emotional independence and stability. You'll have a sense of self that is malleable at points but concrete in others. Life decisions that feel too big and too real at a younger age are able to be made with thoughtfulness instead of panic. By your late thirties, life is yours. The future is scary but you have the tools to deal with it. I promise, things get better. At 41 I can mourn for things I miss in my past, and laugh at the disaster of my twenties, but it gets SO MUCH BETTER.
thanks for the comment. i always say to people that 20s-30s are very early in life and it’s true we live in our own timeline/pace, best thing to do is to keep doing your own thing cause everything works out in the end
As a 22 year old the feeling of “is this it?“ is very real. I’m just so worried about becoming trapped in a regular 9 to 5, day in day out, like some kind of time loop. Pursuing my passions is one of the only things that makes me feel like I can escape from that
A comment on the parents getting older part: Growing up you often depend on your parents, and even in your 20's you still do (especially if you live with them). Obviously we start depending less on them, but there comes a point where we can no longer depend on them, because they are too old to help us. At some point there will no longer be a place to return to, and that is terrifying
I was at a friend's grandparents funeral a few weeks ago... my friends dad choked out through tears "My dad taught me everything I know, I wish he taught me everything he knew."
ik bro I turned 17 this Christmas and never felt this much weight on me it feels HEAVY ASF then 2 be trying to throw yourself into working a part time job and the employers first of all are MEAN and say "i've been working here for 20 yrs "☝🤓 and its like a Panera LMAO be fr
As a 19yo who moved away for college, there’s no pain like the pain of knowing that the person you were yesterday no longer exists :,) you know how humans fear the unknown most? Now imagine your future self is the unknown lol
As someone who’s now 25 - my early 20’s were hands down the worst years of my life so if you’re in your early 20’s and feeling as if you’re sucking at life - I can promise if you give it 3-4 years your mind will be fuckin’ boggled at how much easier/more sense things become. You won’t even realize it either til that milestone. I’m sure you’re doing better than you think.
Honestly, my parents mortality was, and still is, far more daunting than my own. I don’t give af that I’m getting older, I give af that they’re getting older.
the fact that taxes are so tedious is so upsetting on its own, but then you find out that basically every other country besides the us has a much simpler system for it and it makes you even more upset
As a 30 something, my first headtrip was when I realized I could remember my parents being my current age. Then I realized my parents had reached the age my grandparents were when I was a kid
@@VEGAS-NERVE My parents had me in their early to mid 20s, in my earliest memories, they are both still young, active, athletic people who didn’t really start aging noticeably until I was out of high school for a bit. When I was a college freshman my mom was 42 & I remember getting angry at a classmate for hitting on her not realizing she was my mom. But now my parents have both hit 60, are unmistakably old people now & it is a humbling prologue to the next 25 years of my life
My parents once tried to sit my sister and me down for the "when we die...." talk and we actually both said nope we are not learning anything right now. Very relatable skit
I think you should let them tell you because then it will be too late and you will be left with no knowledge on how to deal with it, just hear them out even if its tough
the part about your parents growing old and re-defining ur home really REALLY hit me. im the youngest of 3 and i had to watch my siblings one by one leave our childhood home that i still live in and im realizing how empty the house is now. it also deeply pains me to know that i will be the one to leave my parents to live alone when i do eventually leave and it genuinely haunts me. my mother is already expressing that she doesnt want me to leave, and my father cant even stand the idea of me leaving the house for extended periods of time. growing old is so scary i would do anything to go back in time to experience what it was like to live down the hall from my brothers
Oh man, this reminds me of my younger brother, he'll probably feel this way in 3-5 years. I'm 20 rn, currently in my second year of uni, and my older brother is 23 (also second year in uni, he had a rough patch). My younger brother is 9 years old, I'm honestly struggling to imagine him in double digits, that's already kind of a mindfuck. But I know that by the time he enters high school both my older brother and I will be out of the house, I can't imagine how that'll make him feel. Especially I plan to move to Norway, so I'll be out of the country except for holidays maybe, it'll be a long time until I'd be able to afford those plane tickets so maybe not even. I don't know the age difference between you and your brothers, or your relationship with them, but as an older sibling I can promise you that my biggest fear I have about moving out is feeling like I don't know my younger sibling anymore. I don't know how often we'll talk, or get to see each other, and I fear that by the time I'll see him again he'll be completely unrecognizable to me, and that he won't like the adult I've become. I fear that he will reject our connection after so many years spent apart, and that I'll just have to deal and keep the connection open, just in case he'll want to reconnect down the line or needs some help. So if you miss your brothers, I suggest giving them a call, or shooting them a text message. I'm sure they'd be happy to hear from you.
I'm also the youngest of 3, both my siblings are way older, so I had a lot of time to sit and ruminate about what After would be like. I would express to my sister that I didn't want to leave, I felt like it was on me to stay with our parents. She would always tell me that they would want the best for me, and that means my leaving them at some point. So I did, I left. I'm 3 and a half hours away in my freshman year of college and by no means do I have all the answers. But I can remind you that the best thing you can do right now, while you're still with your parents, is to spend quality time with them. You're probably never going to have the chance to just be with them in that way again. So, spend your time with them, and be kind to them, but remember, at the end of the day, they're going to want the best for you. And that will mean becoming your own person and living your own life
15 (youngest of 3) and my 25yo (oldest) brother is getting married and leaving next year I think. And then my 21yo brother who I'm really really close with will leave too a couple years later. And then me. Out alone to face life and all the stuff I promised myself I would do as a child... It's scary. I don't want to go out into the real world
I relate to this so much im the youngest out of four other siblings and help around a lot with my dad being a single parent im seventeen and i already know he doesnt want me going anywhere
I'm also the youngest, my siblings are way older than me (im 21, they are 32 and 34) I saw the house getting emptier and emptier then growing up - my sis left home really really early. some of my friends were thinking I'm only child... The fact I will not feel at my home in my family home someday is really haunting me too. I'm living 300km away from home bc college now. Thankfully when i back in home I feel like I never left but I know this feeling will fade away. Absolutely terrifying
Worst thing about being knee deep in the workforce is that everything you think, say and do will revolve around work at some point. Your friends? Colleagues you really like. Your topics. Stuff that happened at work when your friends weren't there. Oh, you're sick? Feel bad bc now your colleagues have to take over your shift or, if they don't find anyone, feel bad bc you burden everyone by giving them more work.
I know it's hard but don't let your job become your life!! That is what capitalism wants, for you to live, breathe, and sleep work. Do not let your job define how you spend your free time or how you take care of your health, you will never see the benefits of putting so much thought and energy into your job. Not directing this just at you OP, just a general PSA because it's something I feel strongly about.
FUCK THAT NOISE When I graduated HS I seriously thought about riding the rails and live-streaming. That would’ve done amazing. Follow the soul man. So many creative things I never tried proved fruitful for others.
Connect back with your old friends and stop letting workplaces guilt-trip you for putting your health (and theirs, actually) over their petty profits. It may take months, or even years, but you can take it back. Also, switch jobs. Where you work sounds horrible.
It is important to seperate work and private life. Its okay to make friends with colleagues but tbh none of my friends were colleagues from work and i prefer to keep it that way. Working in nursing, as soon as I leave my shift I don't care about work and apart from funny stories I don't talk about it in my free time. When I'm at work I give it my all, but when my hours are over, i couldn't care less
Getting older really makes your perspective on your parents change. As Mark Twain wrote: "When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
Very relatable. I'm in my thirties now and I've finally found a career path and a company I genuinely enjoy working in. I know it may not be possible for everyone, but if I can give a humble advice, please don't lose hope. It can be a hard and bumpy road, but I believe you can eventually make it. If you find yourself in a toxic environment, where every day feels like hell, leave. Keep searching, you deserve better. Good luck!
this is so helpful, thank you - i’m 19 and already struggling with friends having jobs and i’m still recuperating from high school. i’m glad to see people still finding themselves and i really appreciate that encouragement that everyone has their own time
But are you married and do you have kids and did you find land to live on and did you buy your dad a house yet and is your relationship with your family repaired and That’s my 30 year old checklist and I’m 25 eeeeeeesh
@OfficerZ637even with the slash, man I don’t have the context to see this any other way. One time a bunch of kids at school were calling club penguin cp so I told them what it also stood for and they looked at me weird.
Would like to second this. I didn't really figure anything out until my late 20s into my early 30s then suddenly everything just kind of came together and I'm happier and more satisfied with life now than I ever was in my 20s. Sometimes all it takes is time and perseverance. Sometimes.
I'm 30 years old, graduate, worked for 2 years in 3 different jobs and gave up. I'm so weak that I cannot sustain working to 9-5. I'm jobless and on the edge of severe poverty. Even that doesn't motivate me to work either. I'm barely living thanks to a little help from other people. I'm lucky that they're there, but I could end up on the street at any moment.
I actually teared up at the same time you did. It's a great comfort to actually hear someone talk about things our generation is starting to realize/feel. We're not alone in this.
As someone who lost his father almost ten years ago, the part where you were talking about him asking to go to the park after working all day really hit home with me. My dad was an incredibly hard worker (general manager at an electronics fabrication company AND chief of a volunteer fire department for 20 years), and SOMEHOW he still found time to spend time with us, take us on trips, drive us to practice, etc etc. I realize now that the ONLY way someone could have that much going on in their life and still treat us so well is because we were his WHOLE LIFE outside of work. He didn't sit and play video games for hours. He didn't take 3 hour long naps during the day sometimes. He dedicated everything he had left to us and improving our livelihood and... and I'll never be able to thank him properly. If you love your parents, if you have even a relatively good relationship with them; don't waste it. There will come a time when you won't have any other option than to say goodbye for the last time (if you even get lucky enough to be able to say goodbye before they pass, which I hope you do)
Hug your folks often and keep them close. You never know how much time you have left with them. I learned in my late 20s that life can be very unfair when my father had a heart attack. We almost lost him, and ever since, his health has been poor.
@@James-xd1rf I'm very sorry for your loss. My mother died four weeks ago (about the same time as your dad, I think, since your comment is three weeks old now). It sucks to lose a parent early in life. Not everyone is lucky to have their parents around until middle age or old age. It's just something we take for granted, but health issues and other problems in life do unfortunately happen to some of us, and it does feel unfair. As OP said, cherish the people around you. If it's not your family, then whoever you care about and want to keep close. Especially in this time of grieving. I know it's cliché to say, but after someone passes on, all we have left is the memories of shared moments with them.
@@a.b.9830 Very true. I'm turning 33 this year and I had envisioned seeing my dad living for at least another 20-30 years... I wanted to make more memories with him but I can at least look back on the nice memories we had, even though I squandered a lot of opportunities to have more nice memories. Now I'm just working on cherishing those in my life that are still here. I'm sorry for your loss as well.
I think it's detrimental when the most uncomplicated, innocent, and "happy" years of our existence happen at the beginning of our lives, when we are children. From there on out, responsibilities start to accumulate until the list one day becomes endless, and our world demands more and more of us. And the problem is that you can never go back to that time in your life where your single responsibility for the day was to do your homework, and then you'd be free to play with friends or do your hobbies without inhibitions. We will always hold life up against those uncomplicated happy years when we were kids. I think our 20s is when we really realise we'll never get that kind of childhood freedom back, and I think a lot of us fall into a mental hole as teenagers/young adults. I think at some point in your 30's you realise that, yes, the list of responsibilities keeps growing, and you'll never be free like you used to be, but that's life. You still have to live life, you'll realise there's still a world to experience, and what a waste to spend it wishing for a time you can't go back to anyway. I think once you've lived life as an adult for a few years you find out that even though some doors have closed indefinitely, there's doors to new worlds you've yet to explore. And the great thing is you now have more money to do so as well.
I was in the sauna at the gym reading my book on the origins of the Ebola virus and this older man (probably 60’s or 70’s) started giving me financial advice; stocks and bonds, listen to the podcast our rich journey, Roth IRA, save 20% of each paycheck right now and think about investing!! evidently I was confused by everything he was saying but he said “don’t worry, you’ll learn more about it out of high school” …….. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I’m 23, still in college and barely making rent. But thank you sir, I have literally done none of that but I appreciate your concern for my non existent finances
I also cried when you started talking about our relationships with our parents - I'm turning 26 this year and my mum is looking down the barrel of blood cancer on the other side of the world. It's so scary thinking about what life will be like without her, and I'm so sad all the time about the way teenage me took her for granted and honestly was *so* mean sometimes (no one is meaner than a teenage girl truly).
It truly sucks, I lost my dad to cancer last week and I was supposed to turn 33 this year, and him 58... and I regret all the conversations we didn't have and the times I didn't make an effort to hang out with him.
Turning 24 this month and i still cannot fathom it tbh. Like I feel like I'm still owed the time/experiences I missed during lockdown but no, time just moved forward 😵
I turn 21 in a couple months, I was 17 when the pandemic started and I missed so many crucial highschool/college moments because of the stupid pandemic
I'm in my early 20s. Can't wait to aggressively relate to everything in this video :D❤ Update: That part about our parents getting older and "home" meaning different things....it's rough
i dropped out of high school my sophomore year at 15 years old a year after my sister moved out. my dad died 3 months before i turned 18, he was my best friend, and my mom left our home for a new one in the same year almost immediately after that. ever since then i have been stagnant. i will be turning 20 in seven days. i am the only one left in the house i grew up in, a house that used to belong to the four of us but is now only a home to me and my fading memories of everyone i thought as a kid would be in my life forever would have my back always and even if not physically present at least a phone call or two away. what a selfish, entitled mindset i had. i quite literally watched everyone leave as i aged here on my own. i took everything for granted, i regret the time i wasted, i dwell on my previous mistakes and careless behavior more and more harshly with every setting sun. the constant pain in my chest over every little thing has prevented me from not only moving on but moving forward. the paranoia i felt as a child of things changing too quickly, things no longer being what they are too quickly, and especially things i knew would never be how the were someday - everything i feared then has come true, and its all happened so fast, further justifying the anxiety i had for losing things i hadnt even lost yet. i depend on things staying the same so much now, much more than before, i miss everything so much. if youre reading all of this, thank you, and please cherish every single moment you can. no matter how smal or unimportant. spend time with your parents before you cant anymore. please.
Usually I don’t comment on videos, but I just wanted to say that I hope that things get better for you, I know the feeling of literal heart ache that you mentioned and how horribly torturous the feelings that cause it are, my current way of trying to deal with it/evolve from it is through art. I recommend you try and find a healthy outlet that works for you. My motivation to try and move on is the knowledge that if I keep living in regret of what happened and what could have been/generally grieving the lost time, that in 3 years I’ll look back with regret of the time I’ve wasted then, creating an endless and self fulfilling cycle. Your dad would want you to be happy, so if you can’t find the motivation to try and find joy for yourself, keep trying with the motivation that more than anything, your father probably wanted you to be happy or just generally not stuck in sorrow. Some days are harder than others, but I believe that you have the strength to do it. I wish you all the best❣️
from one stranger to another, i wish you all the best and so much happiness, because it's what you deserve so much. i don't know what i can say to make things even just a little better for you, but know that i am rooting for you and you are never alone, even when you think you are
The feeling never goes away, I’m in my 30s and I’m still looking at people getting married and having kids like.. wtf why, how? That’s crazy. Yeah I don’t know, I guess I’m just not ready to grow up, I honestly don’t think I’ll ever get there. Just gonna be an old dude living the single life, being the one guy who’s definitely too old at the club everyone is like “why is he here?”
Oh man i relate i am 27 now, i do see myself getting married maybe and definitely having a partner. but i don't ever want kids and its gonna be akward seeing my friends have a family
I get that I think that marriage and kids aren't for everyone and there's nothing wrong with that, I don't want to have kids either and I really do enjoy single life (to disbelief to the most of the people) and I am not seeking anyone. You do you.
@@indigosaura What are you talking about? I’m not telling anyone to be like me or anything, just giving my own perspective. Maybe I’m reading your comment wrong, but idk why you’re saying the things you are, like I’m unaware that people aren’t like me lol even though that’s the point of my comment.
@@MetastaticMaladies I was more responding to your phrase "I'm not ready to grow up", I absolutely didn't mean anything negative I'm sorry I came across that way. I think that everyone's path in life is beautiful, and because you're not doing what your peers are does not mean you haven't grown. And y the way, the older people sitting alone at the club is usually who I spend the night with, listening to stories and sharing laughs 🥰
as a teenager rn im so scared to be an adult 😭 like as much as i comain abt school it really is the best time of my life edit: y'all when i say best time of my life i'm kinda talking abt stuff like having classes with my friends, knowing that i'm at a point in life where things aren't super serious yet, being a student etc. trust me i also despise school sometimes lmao
Best advice I can give is focus more on school/your current life than your future life, especially since you're in high school. And I guess just take random opportunities as learning experiences for communication and self reflection. You'll be able to adjust from there
i'm turning 20 in two days and i'm so scared of leaving my teenage years behind, it's like now you don't have an excuse for anything but at the same time you don't have the enough experience to do certain things that everyone expects you to do and know, and i feel like a lot of people in their early twenties feel just as clueless in what path to choose and very insecure in the life decisions they make
I turned 20 not too long before you [by around a week], and that thing about experience is as real as it gets. Just take it at your own pace, Don't feel the need to make excuses for shortcomings in experience and have patience, the speed at which everyone learns stuff is underestimated big time; just gotta fight through it for now
See it as a phase, see adult hood as a new chapter in life. Yes your teenager years were easier but you are leveling up and each level ahead is harder and has more challenges, but if life didn’t had challenges it’ll be too easy and boring
I‘m 24. What is wild to me is how much faster time seems to go by being in the workforce. One month in school seemed like forever whereas now, one month feels like no time at all. My partner (m29) and I are renovating our first home together. Working a 40+ hours week plus renovating the house in the evenings/on the weekends, life feels like one big blurr. Even if it is hard sometimes, I‘ve never been happier in my entire life. My partner and I are financially stable and we don‘t have to pinch every cent like we used to have just 2-3 years ago. We‘re also planning to get married in the next 1-2 years. All of those big changes are exciting. Life is good.
im gonna be 20 this year and i feel so scared of growing up. it still feels like yesterday when i was scared to be 18 :') the way i cope atp is to just think: if i made it through 18, im gonna be fine in my 20s and i really hope i will be. cheers to my fellow 04’s 🎉
i also turn 20 this year in december. my last year as a teenager and i’m trying to enjoy the freedom. i start university in the fall so i only have a few months left of unrestricted freedom. I’m scared of all the pressure i’m about to face and it feels like im about to leave my youth behind.
OML EMILY i watch every single one of your videos as soon as they come out no matter the subject of it. i think you’re the most hilarious just simple creator and your sarcastic skits make the day i’m having just amazing no matter how bad it was !! ILYSM i hope you fulfill your dream and eventually get a role in a tv series or a movie, you deserve it ❤
Thank you for this video, Emily, I lost my dad a year ago, when I was barely 20 so I had to “grow up” pretty fast. I never thought of living in the world where my parents won’t be around. I think back to the times when I refused to spend time with him or to even call him because of an argument. I often cry just thinking “I could’ve done it differently”. I can’t change what happened but I found myself calling my mom almost everyday, even though I don’t have much to say. I come back home from uni as much as I can to spend more time with her. Sometimes even sleep in one bed with her, just trying to feel like the small little girl I used to be. I wish I knew all this earlier so I could make the most of our moments as a whole family.
The part about parents is soooo true. Almost made me cry too. 💔 I'm 24 and now that i think back at my childhood and teenage years i regret my behavior towards my parents so much. As i am growing older i tend to be more considerate towards them and i understand them more now.
to those who still have their parents- truly treasure them while you can. my dad suddenly died in his sleep earlier this year, right before my 21st birthday. i had a detachment, thinking i would at least have another few years, only for it to happen so suddenly. spend time with them while they’re around.
I'm 18 and scared. I am so worried about living; I have no friends, don't have great relationships with my family and I am generally scared of people. I've never worked because I applied to one position and I could tell that I'm way too nervous. I never got to experience my teens because I'm not a normal person and I just don't know how to act like one. I'm just short of giving up completely because nothing I do seems to work. I wish I was normal. I don't really have a personality and when I leave home I will probably become completely isolated. I'm also worried about having to buy things because I hate spending money on myself and also having to think of my own food because if I don't like one option I would rather just not eat anything instead of finding something else to eat.
Hey there i know how you feel. What helped me when i was your age is that i tried to develop real interests. It does not matter what, but you need to find what brings you joy. When i followed my interests, i developed my personality and got way more confident. When you have something you enjoy you will find people with the Same Hobby. I Hope this is Not stupid advice for you and i wish you all the best 🥰
i felt so much like you when i was 18. i was struggling so much with myself after graduating. i always felt i'm such an empty person with nothing to offer and nothing to talk about to new people to make friends. i'm 20 now and i still feel like i'm not passionate enough about anything and i find it hard to stick to new interests and be myself. i started over at a new uni this year and realized i'm not totally incapable of talking to new people i just wasn't around the right people. i really hope you can also find an environment where you feel more confident in yourself too.
I'm only 17, turning 18 on April the 28th. Yay??? Idk tbh. I really want to become a graphic designer and i wanna move out in a nice lil apartment but I keep getting told by strangers online and adults in my life to give up on the dream....
i think the realistic answer is dreams are nice but you have to make sure you have a roof over your head and food on the table first. should you just drop everything and move to LA with no money because you want to be an artist? probably not. but doing something like going to college, finding a degree that intersects with stability and your interests, while developing your art on the side and building a side hustle off of it… sounds much more realistic. of course its easier said than done and there will be tough times but its doable. for example if there was a little boy who grew up wanting to play in the NBA but ended up being 5’9 and only good at computer science, it doesnt mean he has to throw away his passions and resign himself to slaving away for a random soulless company… why not shoot to be a data scientist for the NBA… etc… someone who’s obsessed with film but is only great at business can go work in marketing for a movie studio… event coordinator for an art gallery, etc… its not just either or. there are more opportunities and jobs in the “in between” space than you realize.
hey ill be the online stranger to say my online friend is a graphic designer and they said theyre living comfortably! and then i asked my art teacher and she said her friends in graphic design / digital media are doing pretty well. it's probably the most stable art thing to go into right now. im also turning 18 this year, we got this 💪
I’m studying journalism rn and idk about myself but my graphic designer friends are doing rlly good ! Social media is huge now for businesses so they all care ab graphic designers a lot!
As a 22 year old, this video hit home! It’s a tough transition but I want to believe that we will figure it out :) hang in there girl keep following your dreams
I worked so hard in high school and college to pursue a career in medicine so now i can finally say, at 21, that i am looking forward to getting a full time job as soon as i graduate from college and finish grad/med school. I have been working since i was 15 and at this point, im tired of workin and going to school at the same time ( even tho i know it is a privilege). As the eldest daughter in an immigrant family i feel like ive taken on the adult role from an early age, so just working and worrying about myself will be blissful
I'm 23 and about to graduate college and join the workforce (engineering) and I'm stressed about getting a job before I graduate, but I look forward to it because a couple years ago I had a summer internship and only took 1 class and it was absolute bliss getting to go home at 5pm and have nothing to do (or rather have time to do whatever) for several hours. I have so many hobbies and things I want to learn and practice, I don't have a TV or game consoles so I can just focus on my interests and learn new things instead of being miserable trying to study, completing assignments, and working on projects just to get a C in a class.
I once read; “Don’t live through your trauma before it happens.” So when I think of losing my cat I’ve raised throughout all of high school or my grandmother who raised me, that really helps me center myself in the present and enjoy my time with them while I can.
24 here and OH BOY being in your 20s is wild. So much changes so quickly and it's so hard to just.. figure shit out as you go. On top of that, I recently (like the past 5 months) learned that I am autistic 🙃 so like, thats a whole extra thing that I've been unearthing on top of just trying to survive regular existence lmao. The thought of being trapped in the same 9-5 until I die is worse than death itself imo. Another thing that's difficult to grapple with as you grow into adulthood is the realization that your parents are just humans. Like, seeing all of their traumas and issues and ways they haven't grown is really hard to come to terms with. Instead of the perfect, stable people I saw as a kid, I now see them for the regular humans that they are. Seeing eye to eye with your parents is a strange shift in perspective.
Being in your early twenties is a real pain, you're out of the house, you're figuring things out, you have college with lots of classes you don't want to take and the expenses that come with it, you have a menial public facing job that pays s*** with no autonomy and you're in an environment often that does not take you seriously, hell you cant even rent a car until you are 25. As someone who is beyond their twenties, it does get better as you develop and have a better understanding of this adulting world. It is important as you get older to understand were you came from as you enjoy some of the fruit of your hard work and don't forget what you had to struggle with and more importantly be empathetic towards the people who are coming in the the workforce and entering the real word from their parents household for the first time. Regardless of your age or generation, don't forget to have a little fun and enjoy the things that make you happy.
This is all ideally the case. I didn't leave home until 23 for school, didn't graduate until 27, and still have a menial public facing job that pays shit at almost 33.
Why is this sooo real for me. 😢 I hate working. I can't do this for the next 50 years. I need something more fulfilling but I don't even know what that is and how to get to it...
Hi there. Take some advice from an old guy (me). Your job doesn’t need to be fulfilling. Your income from your job should be enough for you to afford a fulfilling life on your personal time, away from the job. Hope that makes sense.
@jamesfierro4309 is right!! U don't need a dream job, just something u can manage doing for however many hours a week that pays enough to support u doing what u rlly enjoy outside of it ❤️ Besides, the workforce isn't all dystopian! Once u end up somewhere satisfactory, you'll be getting to chat with friendly colleagues, work on solving problems & accomplishing tasks, enjoying a walk after yr lunch, listening to music/podcasts/books on yr commute, & hopefully doing some halfway meaningful work! It's something to do in yr day & it funds yr better life, the half with friends & games & holidays :) Hang in there & don't give up until u end up with such a job! U got this! ✨️
@stellarshakes Thank you both for saying this. You make it sound way more doable. I do need another job though cuz what I'm doing now really is not working for me. I'll make it happen. You're right. I totally got this 💪.
I turned 20 four months ago and it made me realize I peaked in kindergarten 😁
felt lmao november baby as well?
@@fanghellfire3817 yesss fellow november baby!!!
@@fanghellfire3817same but i turned 19 lmao
Lol the only time i was in a relationship was in kindergarten 💀
@@MinMin-kq2znSAME BESTIE 😍
listen to me. listen. im turning 29 soon. your early 20's are NOT the shape the rest of your life will be. like, the pandemic completelly destroying my previous career aside, i eneded up going back to uni after a year out to open up more opportunities for myself. that moved into me going into volunteering, going into freelance work, going into a bunch of super amazing projects, then getting part-time work in something that was NOT my field of study. the trajectory of my life completely changed in the 7 years since i graduated my BA.
and yeah i DO have friends who got married, have kids, have a house (literally how??? the economy is in shambles), but i know a stack of other people who are in shared rentals, living with parents, some who came out of shitty situations directly into another shitty situation. we aren't all handed the same cards and comparing yourself to others literally is not going to do anything for you.
you gotta do you.
and yeah the adults around you are getting older. my nan turned 81 yesterday. even the kids are older - my cousin is 18??? i remember him being brand new born. the passage of time is inescapable. but you cant be afraid of it and decide your now is your forever, or convince yourself that you're like...elderly.
your 20s are for your cringefail stumbling around figuring shit you. idk about you dweebs but i cant WAIT to be a hot and funny 32 year old
Goat comment
This is good advice that I should listen to since I do caught myself obsessing on how I'm progressing or reaching my goals at 21 years old or how I know parents will pass away one day due to just time but I shouldn't be dwelling too much and instead do want I can today. A friend of mine always says I think too much in the future, but I don't focus on the present.
I wish this comment was shorter just so I could fit it into a single screenshot
I'm 26 and your comment is inspiring!! And I also can't wait to be a hot and funny 32 year old 😁I actually think my smile lines are flattering and I'm proud of my gray hairs 😁
This is fantastic advice
I'm 22 and one thing even weirder than having your former classmates getting married is having your former classmates dying. 7 people I knew died last year, it's wild. (+ 2 other people that I didn't know who were my age and went to my high school)
its crazy when you grow older than them a kid i was graduating with died to
opioids and its crazy to think about
@@edithmacpherson-kp1jn This whole time I was worried about my grandma dying. I never thought my best friend would die first. I celebrated my grandma's 101st birthday 2 days after my 22yo friend's funeral, like huh?? Like, what have we even done in our lives until today? They just went to school and died ☠️ its crazy bro
@@edithmacpherson-kp1jn now even my cat might live longer than my friend ☠️
Wow, crazy, my condolences
exactly!! like after graduation 3 people died within weeks of each other. it was insane.
When I was 23, my mom died. 6 years prior, my dad died. I'm almost 26 yrs, and I still relate to all of this. Having no parents is scary, you constantly feel like you're stumbling. Probably the hardest part of all, is recognising no one else in the world will love you unconditionally or on par to that, as a parent does. Definitely cherish the times you have, take them to places they wanted to go to, laugh at their goofy jokes, understand that age can add to mood, rest is good for them and be happy to have them. Life is really short, it's what makes it sweet x
That must have been hard to experience at such a young age. You sound like you've grown a lot to be able to think this way about these experiences. I am 29 myself, and I lost my mother recently. I feel the way you describe: scared, sort of lost, and stumbling through life. I still have my dad but our relationship is strained because he used to verbally abuse me when I was a kid, so it doesn't feel the same as the relationship I had with my mom. She really accepted me. It's hard to think that I'll never be able to embrace her again and that I won't be able to share my future life experiences with her from this point onward...
@@a.b.9830 I'm so sorry for your loss and in the most human way possible, I wish I could offer a hug. It's nice to hear you had a good relationship with your mom but I understand that it makes it so much more painful. Take things easy, slow down your life a bit would be my advice. Sometimes during these experiences we can do things or be things we wouldn't usually - and sometimes that's a good thing too. Taking time to figure it out, process is important. The lost feeling is odd, it's difficult to explain to people who haven't experienced it. Reaching out to other family, friends, joining a club or just getting out and about is key. My mom died during covid and it was very difficult to be isolated and exist in grief. Nothing will fully repair your broken heart but I hope that it heals as much as it can. Keep strong x
I love your comment and I'm so grateful that you shared from your unique perspective 🫶🏻 you're awesome and I'm so sorry your parents are no longer here
as a high school student, i so strongly dont want to believe this 😭 finding out it might not get better terrifies me
I just turned 20 last week:) I’m a 16 year old teenage girl in my head still. But I’m forced to work full time, it’s terrible 😂😭I’m exhausted. economy sucks, living on your own is so expensive and stressful
@@JettPlane1 oh 😭😭
bro same.
being in university (or in the workforce) can be hard but every stage of life has easy and hard parts. you’ll lose some of the luxuries you’re used to but you’ll gain new ones. things will get better
It does get better in some aspects, and in some it's just different
I’ll be 29 in a couple months. My twenties have been rough inwardly, an extension of my adolescence. I think by 25 I felt different. I felt a maturity that is hard to describe. It’s like adulthood happened to me whether I pursued it or not. After that it was a few years of seriously fighting with myself to fix the mess I had grown up to be. I feel remarkably okay now. All my struggles are still there, but they do not consume me. All I can advise is to persevere. Keep pushing through the hard stuff, it’s far worse not to.
I'm only 17 but work is kind of draining my joy out of life. Like I actually feel so tired I could fall asleep right there about 4-5 hours into every single shift
People complain about school but school is my weekend
Honestly, the thought of having to live like this for the next possibly 50 years is soul sucking. Aint no way i could manage as one of those self sufficient folks but good god i wish i could
@@katierasburn9571seriously 😭
@@katierasburn9571 infinite money glitch: join a polycule
10 years ago I was 17. All I can say is try and enjoy as much as you can. As much as you can push pass the anxiety, timidy and insecurity. It just chains you down and haunts you with regret of what could have been but will never be.
I had to work 8 hours everyday, working 5 hours is a blessing lol
This vid has me crying, I lost my mom and don’t know much about my dad but I’ve had to accept I they wont grow with me. I’m 18 and watching my brother do all this adult things makes me so scared and nervous of the next birthdays, but then again it also makes me feel better bc he overcomes so many obstacles by himself. Makes me feel like I have a chance
Just be careful, though. Being able to overcome things on your own may make you reluctant to ask for help once you are out of your depth because you just get used to figuring it out on your own. I am one of those people.
Currently 24 and reached a point where I am entering the stage of navigating my path and realizing how powerful but also scary that I can make my own decisions. Really resonated and enjoyed the part in the video where you went in depth about growing up and the consequences that our younger selves caused our parents back then.
its such an unfortunate, daunting feeling when you see your parents getting older and realizing one day theyll pass. i think the best thing to do is stop taking them for granted and spend time with them now
Not me taking a personal day today bc I just can’t. I saw a sign Sunday that said it’s ok to rest and then our all staff meeting we were talking about listening to our body. I would say taking strategic time off/unpaid time off is always necessary. It feels good to focus on ourself and listen to ourselves. We have an impact in everything we do. It should be and feel enough. Hoping you’re all taking care of yourselves 💓
I'm A Middle-Millenial & When I Was A Young Man In My Late Teens & Early 20's, We Were Just Coming Out Of The 2008 Recession & A Government Shutdown In The Early 2010's. It Was Hell Back Then. 💯 I'm In My Mid-30's Now, I Pray For Gen-Z Because The Economy Is Far Worse Now Than It Ever Was Back Then! 🙏The Millennials Are Becoming Grandparents Now. 💯
My dad was diagnosed with cancer earlier this year. I am 24. He will probably be gone within a decade. He was almost done with his job and was going to retire in a couple years, but had to retire this year. And this was after my mother broke her hip before Christmas.
Shit sucks, dude. But I'm happy I have my girlfriend with me. Makes me feel less alone.
Love your family, bro. Life can take them whenever it wants to.
ily @tunaboytom 💗
I started working right out of high school because I was delusional enough to think I could live comfortably off 10 dollars an hour and eventually on a part-time income forced on me by my chronic illness. Then I started romanticizing school again after a few years because reality hit and I decided to finally take advantage of my job's college financial aid program. Now I can confidently say they both are sucking the light out of me so I'm currently starting a crochet plushie business on the side to keep myself sane-ish😭✌
i don’t always think about talking about my parents and discussing their will but every now and then it does come to mind how it would be when they won’t be there anymore. just now when you mentioned it in your video, i started to think about it some more and it’s quite scary to imagine them not being there anymore damn. my dad half jokingly told me that when he dies, he doesn’t want any sad faces on his funeral, he wants his funeral to be a party kind of lol and sometimes i still think how i’m gonna have to pull that off? if i were able to manage all of that, i’ll prolly be dancing with tears in my eyes
Y'all are right, one day we won't rely on our parents and that's why it's so important to remember that we all have to take care of each other. Sometimes we all need help and we should take the time to help each other, even if it's just a stranger in the grocery store. It won't be the same, but it can still be good.
I'm 25 and relate!!! Trying to do my taxes after starting to work for myself (graduated college during covid and it totally took me in another direction), trying not to compare myself to others who are making more money, buying a house, etc... and my parents are getting ready to sell my childhood home that holds so many good memories - I am very attached to it :( and the parents getting older thing.... relate hard to that too.
Change is always so weird, and in our twenties, it seems like there is change happening constantly!!! I do wish there were courses on how to do taxes and more adult things.... they kinda just threw us into it
this is so real omg, growing up hurts 😭 i turned 23 a few days ago and couldn't stop crying about all this
I'm obviously pretty late to the train of commenting my experiences on this video but I gotta say, my entire life has always felt like catch-up. At this point, it feels like I'm only going to start living my(stable) life in my late thirties, at the earliest. I'm figuring and dealing with my entire life all by myself more or less. Then I look around at everyone else and it feels like everyone else has supportive family, friends, professional contacts, support systems(both in family and friends and social supports of any kind). The implication here is that I have none of those things. No one ever tells you how hard life is going to be growing up, but also no one tells you how hard life is if you're going at it completely alone. Before anyone comments acting like it's 100% my fault, I had a pretty awful and damaging upbringing that stunted so many aspects of my life, I'm still trying to catch up and eventually feel like a normal person that people actually want to be around and sometimes it honestly feels like I'm the only person. I can't even say I'm exaggerating either. I think the reason why "the 30s are the new 20s" is becoming more popular as a saying(at least in my experience) is becomes in the last few decades, there's been a few generations who have had to go through the experience of lagging behind and only getting to *begin* enjoying their lives by their 30s.
I'm 14 (turning 15 this year) I always get stressed out about future and what will my job be or if I will like it, specially when I am growing up in a family where almost every adult expresses how much they hate working. Even though my 20s are pretty far, I really liked this video, for me it felt like getting advice from an older sister =)
It was wild to not be part of the kids going back to school after summer. Pretty sure i dreamt about going to my high school wondering wtf i was doing there because i already graduated...😅
I'm turning 25 this year and I don't know why the years passed super fast since I was 15
I’m 25 and i feel likes life gets your better when your frontal cortex is fully developed.
Dance monkey dance is dead on the nail! 😂😂😂😂 exactly what it is!
i’m 23 and i started working at 15, and it’s my biggest regret. i should’ve spent my time being a kid and not a drone
Ugh it’s the life shit adding up. I remember I was was on FaceTime with my sister, her boyfriend was getting sick in the other room, I hear him shout “hey babe?”
Her: “yeah?”
Him: “can you bring me my phone? I need to reschedule our grocery delivery next week since we’re on the road Sunday.”
Her: “for sure!”
And then he did it between rounds of getting sick.
Her (to me): “isn’t life after college glamorous?”
Jfc
Oh god. This video caught me off guard. 29 here and this all hits the nail on the head.
I really felt this a lot. I’m 19, turning 20 in a month. I’ve been working for over a year. I moved into an apartment at the start of the year. It feels like there’s no going forward from here, like this is all there is for the next 60 years until I die. It’s been so hard grappling with the fact that I’m not going to be a teenager anymore, but I hardly feel like anything more than a kid. I have no idea what’s going on and everyday is just waiting for my next day off so I can rot in bed for more time than usual. I even fucking miss high school. At least it was a little different every day and some activities were fun, and I didn’t have to worry about taking care of myself. I just want to play outside with my toys and go to school and have dinner at my friends house I don’t want to be stuck like this forever.
Anyways yeah. Good video
this video is legit hard TO WATCH cause its like watching a baby complain and im 27, dude i could rant forever about your take on things,
20s-30s are early in life and since we all live our lives in our own timeline/pace, just focus on doing your own thing. as long as you’re alive that’s all that matters
When I tell people I am excited to be in my 30s, they are shocked. But after fighting through hell that was my early and mid-20s and finally finding my footing, I feel like I am entering my hot girl era. Yeah I still live in shared housing with roommates and live paycheck to paycheck, my frontal lobe is finally fully formed and things make a lot more sense.
I don’t want to grow up 😭 currently 14 turning 15 in a few days and I’m scared that I’ll leave so much regrets that I’ll blame myself for in the future when I’m older. I don’t want to lose everything right now as a kid 😞
HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAY 🤍🤍🤍
I had early access to my 20's at 16 which was like a year or so after I dropped out of school, that was almost a decade ago and I've had several jobs since then
That part about not spending time with your parents really hit home. I'm getting close to the end of mt junior year of high school and now that I think about it, I really wish I said yes more to when my mom would ask me to go do stuff with her. I guess it's because I see her everyday that I don't think about how our window of time together is closing so I reject her cause "there's always tomorrow". I don't feel this way towards my dad though because I hardly ever see him so I never reject his offers to hang out but idk. I'm more worried about not being around enough with my mom especially since she's turning 53 this month and I'm only 16 :c I'm so scared she won't be around when I finish med school like she's always supported me on pursuing 😭 time is really so precious
i graduate in a year. thinking about having a full time job makes me feel like the only sustainable option is to kill myself. i don’t know how i’ll do it, but emily your videos are one joy in the day!
You getting emotional made me get emotional.
i definitely dont think its normal to hate your job. we should be able to do things that make us happy while beign able to live
I literally got a TurboTax ad while watching this
At the tail end of my 20s, but oh wow was this video impactful!
I’m turning 20 next month ,I’m still in college .
I hope I can make my twenties fun
As much as I fear a 9-5 I wish I could just get a job with my degree at this point
o18+ adulthood is always way different than what is expecting. For me, i had to work 14 hours per day. Damn... i guess i learnt how to dance while everything is falling apart. Yes, i could not study, obviously xD!
Hahaha I know how it feels to see many acquitances/mate with whom you grew with getting married 😂
It makes feel old or late...
(Fortunately?) most of my friends are still looking for or even never have any girlfriend so it makes me feel normal
I just turned 41, and everything you're saying is 100% on point. Your early 20s are the tail-end of puberty and adolesce. You've had very little work experience (save for those who had jobs in their early to mid teens) and are expected to jump in and perform seamlessly.
Your early 20s are a complete mess, a disaster, a thing to be fought through and learned from, and can be pretty miserable. By your mid 20s, things are evening out. Thirty looms, passes while you lament the fact, and before you know it, you're 33 and things are ... Good? Nice? You do the unpleasant things (phone calls to insurance agents 😵) with hardly a second thought. You often have the option for free time.
Your twenties ARE rough, but there is so much life ahead, and it is phenomenal. Yourh is held up as this thing you "have" then "lose", but no one seems to mention that you gain so much more: knowledge, connections, financial and emotional independence and stability. You'll have a sense of self that is malleable at points but concrete in others. Life decisions that feel too big and too real at a younger age are able to be made with thoughtfulness instead of panic.
By your late thirties, life is yours. The future is scary but you have the tools to deal with it. I promise, things get better. At 41 I can mourn for things I miss in my past, and laugh at the disaster of my twenties, but it gets SO MUCH BETTER.
that was beautiful idk that was written in a way I could understand so easily thanks
I definitely wasn't a fan of my 20s and wouldn't want to go back. It's just a lot easier to pursue happiness after that.
thanks for the comment. i always say to people that 20s-30s are very early in life and it’s true
we live in our own timeline/pace, best thing to do is to keep doing your own thing cause everything works out in the end
This was so great to read, thank you! I turn 30 soon and I already feel like my 30s will be a lot better than my 20s. But I do mourn the loss of youth
thank you that's reassuring :)
the part where you brought up your parents getting older.. my smile completely faded its something im so scared for.
Same I literally teared up with her esp when she mentioned about her dad, it made me think about mine whom I feel I don’t appreciate enough
@@binibiniyasame 😭
@@binibiniyame too:((
@@binibiniya tell him how you feel, talk to him. You won’t regret it, you will if you don’t though, trust me.
same i dont like time progressing...
i literally cannot concieve myself being a part of the workforce, all day every day for my entire life until I die like, high school is hard enough
It always sucks but you get used to the routine just like you do with school 😭
You could always forage and hunt for your food...
same. that's why I will be writing books and being agoraphobic
Same. I dropped out of college and now i try to work as little as possible and figure out what the fuck to do with uhm life
no literally bc i can barley get thru the day without crying in the bathroom how am i expected to work 😭
As a 22 year old the feeling of “is this it?“ is very real. I’m just so worried about becoming trapped in a regular 9 to 5, day in day out, like some kind of time loop. Pursuing my passions is one of the only things that makes me feel like I can escape from that
Real
can relate for sure
you should watch the green knight, with dev patel
Real
There are a lot of people who'd love to be in your shoes having constant job and income.
As a teenager barely surviving high school, i can vouch that your twenties are so like this.
YOU CAN DO IT!
Have hope kiddo(I'm 22)
You are the perfect expert! LOL!
Cliché, but it really does get better. If not in your twenties, then by your thirties. (I'm 31).
“Specifically yours”
"Age is just a number.... yes, and mine is increasing." -- That's about the best summation of life's journey I've ever come across.
A comment on the parents getting older part:
Growing up you often depend on your parents, and even in your 20's you still do (especially if you live with them). Obviously we start depending less on them, but there comes a point where we can no longer depend on them, because they are too old to help us. At some point there will no longer be a place to return to, and that is terrifying
We stop depending on our parents, and then they'll have to depend on us eventually 😢
No longer having a place to return to ..😭 this is destroying me….
Yeah, it sucks when they're still alive and you've never been able to depend on them even when you're homeless
I was at a friend's grandparents funeral a few weeks ago... my friends dad choked out through tears "My dad taught me everything I know, I wish he taught me everything he knew."
@@Mandangoi’m so used to ‘😭’ being used as a laughing emoji that it’s surreal to see it used in actual sad contexts
As a 17 year old girl who is completely and utterly terrified of growing up, I had to stop this video halfway and take a breather :,)
ik bro I turned 17 this Christmas and never felt this much weight on me it feels HEAVY ASF then 2 be trying to throw yourself into working a part time job and the employers first of all are MEAN and say "i've been working here for 20 yrs "☝🤓 and its like a Panera LMAO be fr
@@sogcig exactly! and im trying my hardest to get a job in a place where "everyone's hiring" but they dont even look at my application
we- we'll be fine mate! I think if we make well informed decisions things will turn out well.... right? *RIGHT?*
As a 19yo who moved away for college, there’s no pain like the pain of knowing that the person you were yesterday no longer exists :,) you know how humans fear the unknown most? Now imagine your future self is the unknown lol
Right here with ya sister
As someone who’s now 25 - my early 20’s were hands down the worst years of my life so if you’re in your early 20’s and feeling as if you’re sucking at life - I can promise if you give it 3-4 years your mind will be fuckin’ boggled at how much easier/more sense things become. You won’t even realize it either til that milestone. I’m sure you’re doing better than you think.
My early 20s was Covid
needed that
Thank you I needed this😅
@@ccvv1119, man, my early 20's was Covid. And then war.
:)
haha thanks that gives me some hope
Honestly, my parents mortality was, and still is, far more daunting than my own. I don’t give af that I’m getting older, I give af that they’re getting older.
the fact that taxes are so tedious is so upsetting on its own, but then you find out that basically every other country besides the us has a much simpler system for it and it makes you even more upset
And the fact it's not done automatically by the govt makes you vulnerable to identity theft if your online tax service is hacked.
In Estonia you can do it all online in around 10 mins.. Very easy
It's all because companies like Turbo Tax lobby the government to keep it complicated for their benefit. Fuck Turbo Tax.
@kpeyton3 I'm from the UK so I get you but you're putting salt on the wound here and i cant help but feel bad while laughing😆😆
I wouldn't even know what to do. Taxes are automatically deducted from the paycheck in the UK so that takes all of the responsibility out of it.
as a teenager I CANNOT even fathom my parents getting old and wrinkly while I live in a musty apartment filled with rats
As a 30 something, my first headtrip was when I realized I could remember my parents being my current age. Then I realized my parents had reached the age my grandparents were when I was a kid
my mom had me late in her 30s so i grew up with seeing my parents age and start graying
@@santiv4parents had me in their 40’s lol. I don’t remember them ever being "young"
idgi
@@VEGAS-NERVE My parents had me in their early to mid 20s, in my earliest memories, they are both still young, active, athletic people who didn’t really start aging noticeably until I was out of high school for a bit. When I was a college freshman my mom was 42 & I remember getting angry at a classmate for hitting on her not realizing she was my mom. But now my parents have both hit 60, are unmistakably old people now & it is a humbling prologue to the next 25 years of my life
My parents once tried to sit my sister and me down for the "when we die...." talk and we actually both said nope we are not learning anything right now. Very relatable skit
I think you should let them tell you because then it will be too late and you will be left with no knowledge on how to deal with it, just hear them out even if its tough
the part about your parents growing old and re-defining ur home really REALLY hit me. im the youngest of 3 and i had to watch my siblings one by one leave our childhood home that i still live in and im realizing how empty the house is now. it also deeply pains me to know that i will be the one to leave my parents to live alone when i do eventually leave and it genuinely haunts me. my mother is already expressing that she doesnt want me to leave, and my father cant even stand the idea of me leaving the house for extended periods of time. growing old is so scary i would do anything to go back in time to experience what it was like to live down the hall from my brothers
Oh man, this reminds me of my younger brother, he'll probably feel this way in 3-5 years. I'm 20 rn, currently in my second year of uni, and my older brother is 23 (also second year in uni, he had a rough patch). My younger brother is 9 years old, I'm honestly struggling to imagine him in double digits, that's already kind of a mindfuck.
But I know that by the time he enters high school both my older brother and I will be out of the house, I can't imagine how that'll make him feel. Especially I plan to move to Norway, so I'll be out of the country except for holidays maybe, it'll be a long time until I'd be able to afford those plane tickets so maybe not even.
I don't know the age difference between you and your brothers, or your relationship with them, but as an older sibling I can promise you that my biggest fear I have about moving out is feeling like I don't know my younger sibling anymore. I don't know how often we'll talk, or get to see each other, and I fear that by the time I'll see him again he'll be completely unrecognizable to me, and that he won't like the adult I've become. I fear that he will reject our connection after so many years spent apart, and that I'll just have to deal and keep the connection open, just in case he'll want to reconnect down the line or needs some help.
So if you miss your brothers, I suggest giving them a call, or shooting them a text message. I'm sure they'd be happy to hear from you.
I'm also the youngest of 3, both my siblings are way older, so I had a lot of time to sit and ruminate about what After would be like.
I would express to my sister that I didn't want to leave, I felt like it was on me to stay with our parents. She would always tell me that they would want the best for me, and that means my leaving them at some point.
So I did, I left. I'm 3 and a half hours away in my freshman year of college and by no means do I have all the answers. But I can remind you that the best thing you can do right now, while you're still with your parents, is to spend quality time with them. You're probably never going to have the chance to just be with them in that way again. So, spend your time with them, and be kind to them, but remember, at the end of the day, they're going to want the best for you. And that will mean becoming your own person and living your own life
15 (youngest of 3) and my 25yo (oldest) brother is getting married and leaving next year I think. And then my 21yo brother who I'm really really close with will leave too a couple years later. And then me. Out alone to face life and all the stuff I promised myself I would do as a child... It's scary. I don't want to go out into the real world
I relate to this so much im the youngest out of four other siblings and help around a lot with my dad being a single parent im seventeen and i already know he doesnt want me going anywhere
I'm also the youngest, my siblings are way older than me (im 21, they are 32 and 34) I saw the house getting emptier and emptier then growing up - my sis left home really really early. some of my friends were thinking I'm only child...
The fact I will not feel at my home in my family home someday is really haunting me too. I'm living 300km away from home bc college now. Thankfully when i back in home I feel like I never left but I know this feeling will fade away. Absolutely terrifying
Worst thing about being knee deep in the workforce is that everything you think, say and do will revolve around work at some point. Your friends? Colleagues you really like. Your topics. Stuff that happened at work when your friends weren't there. Oh, you're sick? Feel bad bc now your colleagues have to take over your shift or, if they don't find anyone, feel bad bc you burden everyone by giving them more work.
I know it's hard but don't let your job become your life!! That is what capitalism wants, for you to live, breathe, and sleep work. Do not let your job define how you spend your free time or how you take care of your health, you will never see the benefits of putting so much thought and energy into your job. Not directing this just at you OP, just a general PSA because it's something I feel strongly about.
That is too true and I hate that
FUCK THAT NOISE
When I graduated HS I seriously thought about riding the rails and live-streaming. That would’ve done amazing.
Follow the soul man. So many creative things I never tried proved fruitful for others.
Connect back with your old friends and stop letting workplaces guilt-trip you for putting your health (and theirs, actually) over their petty profits.
It may take months, or even years, but you can take it back.
Also, switch jobs. Where you work sounds horrible.
It is important to seperate work and private life. Its okay to make friends with colleagues but tbh none of my friends were colleagues from work and i prefer to keep it that way. Working in nursing, as soon as I leave my shift I don't care about work and apart from funny stories I don't talk about it in my free time. When I'm at work I give it my all, but when my hours are over, i couldn't care less
Getting older really makes your perspective on your parents change.
As Mark Twain wrote:
"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
the real world is honestly so expensive. stay at home and save if you’re allowed to and if you can feasibly save even a little bit at a time.
So true! My dad was able to move out on his own at 19, but this was in 1981. It's nearly impossible now.
Very relatable. I'm in my thirties now and I've finally found a career path and a company I genuinely enjoy working in. I know it may not be possible for everyone, but if I can give a humble advice, please don't lose hope. It can be a hard and bumpy road, but I believe you can eventually make it. If you find yourself in a toxic environment, where every day feels like hell, leave. Keep searching, you deserve better. Good luck!
this is so helpful, thank you - i’m 19 and already struggling with friends having jobs and i’m still recuperating from high school. i’m glad to see people still finding themselves and i really appreciate that encouragement that everyone has their own time
Really needed this advice thank you
But are you married and do you have kids and did you find land to live on and did you buy your dad a house yet and is your relationship with your family repaired and
That’s my 30 year old checklist and I’m 25 eeeeeeesh
@OfficerZ637even with the slash, man I don’t have the context to see this any other way.
One time a bunch of kids at school were calling club penguin cp so I told them what it also stood for and they looked at me weird.
Would like to second this. I didn't really figure anything out until my late 20s into my early 30s then suddenly everything just kind of came together and I'm happier and more satisfied with life now than I ever was in my 20s. Sometimes all it takes is time and perseverance. Sometimes.
I'm 30 years old, graduate, worked for 2 years in 3 different jobs and gave up. I'm so weak that I cannot sustain working to 9-5. I'm jobless and on the edge of severe poverty. Even that doesn't motivate me to work either. I'm barely living thanks to a little help from other people. I'm lucky that they're there, but I could end up on the street at any moment.
I know it really means nothing, but I hope things get better for you, you don't deserve that
Is your situation better?😢🥺🥺
I actually teared up at the same time you did. It's a great comfort to actually hear someone talk about things our generation is starting to realize/feel. We're not alone in this.
As someone who lost his father almost ten years ago, the part where you were talking about him asking to go to the park after working all day really hit home with me. My dad was an incredibly hard worker (general manager at an electronics fabrication company AND chief of a volunteer fire department for 20 years), and SOMEHOW he still found time to spend time with us, take us on trips, drive us to practice, etc etc. I realize now that the ONLY way someone could have that much going on in their life and still treat us so well is because we were his WHOLE LIFE outside of work. He didn't sit and play video games for hours. He didn't take 3 hour long naps during the day sometimes. He dedicated everything he had left to us and improving our livelihood and... and I'll never be able to thank him properly.
If you love your parents, if you have even a relatively good relationship with them; don't waste it. There will come a time when you won't have any other option than to say goodbye for the last time (if you even get lucky enough to be able to say goodbye before they pass, which I hope you do)
This... I wasted it in regards to my parents and there is so much regret.
my father is the person who’d sit for hours playing video games in his freetime and sleep. i ache for what you had
Wow, what an underrated comment! Thank you so much!
Hug your folks often and keep them close. You never know how much time you have left with them. I learned in my late 20s that life can be very unfair when my father had a heart attack. We almost lost him, and ever since, his health has been poor.
At least he's still around... mine died last week.
@@James-xd1rf im so sorry for your loss
@@James-xd1rf I'm very sorry for your loss. My mother died four weeks ago (about the same time as your dad, I think, since your comment is three weeks old now). It sucks to lose a parent early in life. Not everyone is lucky to have their parents around until middle age or old age. It's just something we take for granted, but health issues and other problems in life do unfortunately happen to some of us, and it does feel unfair. As OP said, cherish the people around you. If it's not your family, then whoever you care about and want to keep close. Especially in this time of grieving. I know it's cliché to say, but after someone passes on, all we have left is the memories of shared moments with them.
@@apriluno7210 thank you for your kind words.
@@a.b.9830 Very true. I'm turning 33 this year and I had envisioned seeing my dad living for at least another 20-30 years... I wanted to make more memories with him but I can at least look back on the nice memories we had, even though I squandered a lot of opportunities to have more nice memories. Now I'm just working on cherishing those in my life that are still here.
I'm sorry for your loss as well.
I think it's detrimental when the most uncomplicated, innocent, and "happy" years of our existence happen at the beginning of our lives, when we are children. From there on out, responsibilities start to accumulate until the list one day becomes endless, and our world demands more and more of us. And the problem is that you can never go back to that time in your life where your single responsibility for the day was to do your homework, and then you'd be free to play with friends or do your hobbies without inhibitions. We will always hold life up against those uncomplicated happy years when we were kids. I think our 20s is when we really realise we'll never get that kind of childhood freedom back, and I think a lot of us fall into a mental hole as teenagers/young adults.
I think at some point in your 30's you realise that, yes, the list of responsibilities keeps growing, and you'll never be free like you used to be, but that's life. You still have to live life, you'll realise there's still a world to experience, and what a waste to spend it wishing for a time you can't go back to anyway. I think once you've lived life as an adult for a few years you find out that even though some doors have closed indefinitely, there's doors to new worlds you've yet to explore. And the great thing is you now have more money to do so as well.
I was in the sauna at the gym reading my book on the origins of the Ebola virus and this older man (probably 60’s or 70’s) started giving me financial advice; stocks and bonds, listen to the podcast our rich journey, Roth IRA, save 20% of each paycheck right now and think about investing!! evidently I was confused by everything he was saying but he said “don’t worry, you’ll learn more about it out of high school” …….. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I’m 23, still in college and barely making rent. But thank you sir, I have literally done none of that but I appreciate your concern for my non existent finances
AWWEEE😂😂🥰
same. were all kids to ppl over 40 though. lol. pl over 60 think were babies. lol
I also cried when you started talking about our relationships with our parents - I'm turning 26 this year and my mum is looking down the barrel of blood cancer on the other side of the world. It's so scary thinking about what life will be like without her, and I'm so sad all the time about the way teenage me took her for granted and honestly was *so* mean sometimes (no one is meaner than a teenage girl truly).
It truly sucks, I lost my dad to cancer last week and I was supposed to turn 33 this year, and him 58... and I regret all the conversations we didn't have and the times I didn't make an effort to hang out with him.
Turning 24 this month and i still cannot fathom it tbh. Like I feel like I'm still owed the time/experiences I missed during lockdown but no, time just moved forward 😵
Yes.. this 😢
I'm turning 25 soon and I spent my 21st birthday during the pandemic with no friends... I hate this...
Yeah man it still takes me a minute whenever someone asks me how old i am, like oh yeah shit I’m not 22 anymore
@@PGOuma same here 😅
I turn 21 in a couple months, I was 17 when the pandemic started and I missed so many crucial highschool/college moments because of the stupid pandemic
I'm 29 and when people announce they're pregnant I still say "On purpose?"
Me too for real 😂
I'm in my early 20s. Can't wait to aggressively relate to everything in this video :D❤
Update: That part about our parents getting older and "home" meaning different things....it's rough
i dropped out of high school my sophomore year at 15 years old a year after my sister moved out. my dad died 3 months before i turned 18, he was my best friend, and my mom left our home for a new one in the same year almost immediately after that. ever since then i have been stagnant. i will be turning 20 in seven days. i am the only one left in the house i grew up in, a house that used to belong to the four of us but is now only a home to me and my fading memories of everyone i thought as a kid would be in my life forever would have my back always and even if not physically present at least a phone call or two away. what a selfish, entitled mindset i had. i quite literally watched everyone leave as i aged here on my own. i took everything for granted, i regret the time i wasted, i dwell on my previous mistakes and careless behavior more and more harshly with every setting sun. the constant pain in my chest over every little thing has prevented me from not only moving on but moving forward. the paranoia i felt as a child of things changing too quickly, things no longer being what they are too quickly, and especially things i knew would never be how the were someday - everything i feared then has come true, and its all happened so fast, further justifying the anxiety i had for losing things i hadnt even lost yet. i depend on things staying the same so much now, much more than before, i miss everything so much.
if youre reading all of this, thank you, and please cherish every single moment you can. no matter how smal or unimportant. spend time with your parents before you cant anymore.
please.
Usually I don’t comment on videos, but I just wanted to say that I hope that things get better for you, I know the feeling of literal heart ache that you mentioned and how horribly torturous the feelings that cause it are, my current way of trying to deal with it/evolve from it is through art. I recommend you try and find a healthy outlet that works for you.
My motivation to try and move on is the knowledge that if I keep living in regret of what happened and what could have been/generally grieving the lost time, that in 3 years I’ll look back with regret of the time I’ve wasted then, creating an endless and self fulfilling cycle.
Your dad would want you to be happy, so if you can’t find the motivation to try and find joy for yourself, keep trying with the motivation that more than anything, your father probably wanted you to be happy or just generally not stuck in sorrow.
Some days are harder than others, but I believe that you have the strength to do it.
I wish you all the best❣️
❤❤
that wasn't a selfish or entitled mindset. that's the mindset we have as kids/adolescents, unless shitty things happen to you during that time
Damn
from one stranger to another, i wish you all the best and so much happiness, because it's what you deserve so much. i don't know what i can say to make things even just a little better for you, but know that i am rooting for you and you are never alone, even when you think you are
The feeling never goes away, I’m in my 30s and I’m still looking at people getting married and having kids like.. wtf why, how? That’s crazy. Yeah I don’t know, I guess I’m just not ready to grow up, I honestly don’t think I’ll ever get there. Just gonna be an old dude living the single life, being the one guy who’s definitely too old at the club everyone is like “why is he here?”
Oh man i relate
i am 27 now, i do see myself getting married maybe and definitely having a partner. but i don't ever want kids and its gonna be akward seeing my friends have a family
I get that I think that marriage and kids aren't for everyone and there's nothing wrong with that, I don't want to have kids either and I really do enjoy single life (to disbelief to the most of the people) and I am not seeking anyone. You do you.
but you have grown up dude, it just looks different than others, if we all followed the same trajectory we'd be a boring ass collective.
@@indigosaura What are you talking about? I’m not telling anyone to be like me or anything, just giving my own perspective. Maybe I’m reading your comment wrong, but idk why you’re saying the things you are, like I’m unaware that people aren’t like me lol even though that’s the point of my comment.
@@MetastaticMaladies I was more responding to your phrase "I'm not ready to grow up", I absolutely didn't mean anything negative I'm sorry I came across that way. I think that everyone's path in life is beautiful, and because you're not doing what your peers are does not mean you haven't grown. And y the way, the older people sitting alone at the club is usually who I spend the night with, listening to stories and sharing laughs 🥰
as a teenager rn im so scared to be an adult 😭 like as much as i comain abt school it really is the best time of my life
edit: y'all when i say best time of my life i'm kinda talking abt stuff like having classes with my friends, knowing that i'm at a point in life where things aren't super serious yet, being a student etc. trust me i also despise school sometimes lmao
wdym the BEST TIME OF YOUR LIFE😢
Best advice I can give is focus more on school/your current life than your future life, especially since you're in high school. And I guess just take random opportunities as learning experiences for communication and self reflection. You'll be able to adjust from there
Yeah just live and enjoy the most you can and do what ya feel feel's right and have nice community around you, family n friends etc. All da best
Same, i hate burnout but i prefer this because of the working hours of work.
Working hours of work what 😭😭
15:12 i cried
PLZ ME TOO
i'm turning 20 in two days and i'm so scared of leaving my teenage years behind, it's like now you don't have an excuse for anything but at the same time you don't have the enough experience to do certain things that everyone expects you to do and know, and i feel like a lot of people in their early twenties feel just as clueless in what path to choose and very insecure in the life decisions they make
Lemme hit
I turned 20 not too long before you [by around a week], and that thing about experience is as real as it gets. Just take it at your own pace, Don't feel the need to make excuses for shortcomings in experience and have patience, the speed at which everyone learns stuff is underestimated big time; just gotta fight through it for now
See it as a phase, see adult hood as a new chapter in life. Yes your teenager years were easier but you are leveling up and each level ahead is harder and has more challenges, but if life didn’t had challenges it’ll be too easy and boring
That’s how I felt when I was 20 too
I‘m 24. What is wild to me is how much faster time seems to go by being in the workforce. One month in school seemed like forever whereas now, one month feels like no time at all. My partner (m29) and I are renovating our first home together. Working a 40+ hours week plus renovating the house in the evenings/on the weekends, life feels like one big blurr.
Even if it is hard sometimes, I‘ve never been happier in my entire life. My partner and I are financially stable and we don‘t have to pinch every cent like we used to have just 2-3 years ago. We‘re also planning to get married in the next 1-2 years. All of those big changes are exciting. Life is good.
im gonna be 20 this year and i feel so scared of growing up. it still feels like yesterday when i was scared to be 18 :') the way i cope atp is to just think: if i made it through 18, im gonna be fine in my 20s and i really hope i will be. cheers to my fellow 04’s 🎉
I'm in the same boat haha gonna be 20 in December so I still have time to be a teenager
hey i’m an 04 too and i’m terrified too. i think ultimately we will be okay though. : )
nahhhh u didnt just say ur an 04 theres no way im gonna be 18 this year :(
I'm an 03, I totally understand. You'll make it through I promise
i also turn 20 this year in december. my last year as a teenager and i’m trying to enjoy the freedom. i start university in the fall so i only have a few months left of unrestricted freedom. I’m scared of all the pressure i’m about to face and it feels like im about to leave my youth behind.
OML EMILY i watch every single one of your videos as soon as they come out no matter the subject of it. i think you’re the most hilarious just simple creator and your sarcastic skits make the day i’m having just amazing no matter how bad it was !! ILYSM i hope you fulfill your dream and eventually get a role in a tv series or a movie, you deserve it ❤
I'm turning 19 this year.. Everyone is telling so many things about the 20s that I just want to come back to my mother's belly :) 💕
Same. I hate it here
Thank you for this video, Emily, I lost my dad a year ago, when I was barely 20 so I had to “grow up” pretty fast. I never thought of living in the world where my parents won’t be around. I think back to the times when I refused to spend time with him or to even call him because of an argument. I often cry just thinking “I could’ve done it differently”. I can’t change what happened but I found myself calling my mom almost everyday, even though I don’t have much to say. I come back home from uni as much as I can to spend more time with her. Sometimes even sleep in one bed with her, just trying to feel like the small little girl I used to be. I wish I knew all this earlier so I could make the most of our moments as a whole family.
The part about parents is soooo true. Almost made me cry too. 💔 I'm 24 and now that i think back at my childhood and teenage years i regret my behavior towards my parents so much. As i am growing older i tend to be more considerate towards them and i understand them more now.
At least you learned this at 24. I didn't learn this until 32 and my dad died last week.
Good. That's always a good sign of maturing
@@James-xd1rf so sorry for your loss. May his soul rest in peace.
to those who still have their parents- truly treasure them while you can. my dad suddenly died in his sleep earlier this year, right before my 21st birthday. i had a detachment, thinking i would at least have another few years, only for it to happen so suddenly. spend time with them while they’re around.
this video was real as f*ck i'm about to cry 😭
I am crying
I'm 18 and scared. I am so worried about living; I have no friends, don't have great relationships with my family and I am generally scared of people. I've never worked because I applied to one position and I could tell that I'm way too nervous. I never got to experience my teens because I'm not a normal person and I just don't know how to act like one. I'm just short of giving up completely because nothing I do seems to work. I wish I was normal. I don't really have a personality and when I leave home I will probably become completely isolated. I'm also worried about having to buy things because I hate spending money on myself and also having to think of my own food because if I don't like one option I would rather just not eat anything instead of finding something else to eat.
Hey there i know how you feel. What helped me when i was your age is that i tried to develop real interests. It does not matter what, but you need to find what brings you joy. When i followed my interests, i developed my personality and got way more confident. When you have something you enjoy you will find people with the Same Hobby. I Hope this is Not stupid advice for you and i wish you all the best 🥰
i felt so much like you when i was 18. i was struggling so much with myself after graduating. i always felt i'm such an empty person with nothing to offer and nothing to talk about to new people to make friends. i'm 20 now and i still feel like i'm not passionate enough about anything and i find it hard to stick to new interests and be myself. i started over at a new uni this year and realized i'm not totally incapable of talking to new people i just wasn't around the right people. i really hope you can also find an environment where you feel more confident in yourself too.
This is your most sincere video. I got a little teary-eyed.
I'm only 17, turning 18 on April the 28th. Yay??? Idk tbh. I really want to become a graphic designer and i wanna move out in a nice lil apartment but I keep getting told by strangers online and adults in my life to give up on the dream....
Never give up! Do what you love and want to do❤
i think the realistic answer is dreams are nice but you have to make sure you have a roof over your head and food on the table first.
should you just drop everything and move to LA with no money because you want to be an artist? probably not.
but doing something like going to college, finding a degree that intersects with stability and your interests, while developing your art on the side and building a side hustle off of it… sounds much more realistic. of course its easier said than done and there will be tough times but its doable.
for example if there was a little boy who grew up wanting to play in the NBA but ended up being 5’9 and only good at computer science, it doesnt mean he has to throw away his passions and resign himself to slaving away for a random soulless company… why not shoot to be a data scientist for the NBA… etc… someone who’s obsessed with film but is only great at business can go work in marketing for a movie studio… event coordinator for an art gallery, etc…
its not just either or. there are more opportunities and jobs in the “in between” space than you realize.
hey ill be the online stranger to say my online friend is a graphic designer and they said theyre living comfortably! and then i asked my art teacher and she said her friends in graphic design / digital media are doing pretty well. it's probably the most stable art thing to go into right now.
im also turning 18 this year, we got this 💪
I’m studying journalism rn and idk about myself but my graphic designer friends are doing rlly good ! Social media is huge now for businesses so they all care ab graphic designers a lot!
I’m in my mid twenties, and this video is way to true
Being in your early twenties is absolute sh!t
If I don't pretend everything is okay I'm going to breakdown 😂
me
As a 22 year old, this video hit home! It’s a tough transition but I want to believe that we will figure it out :) hang in there girl keep following your dreams
I worked so hard in high school and college to pursue a career in medicine so now i can finally say, at 21, that i am looking forward to getting a full time job as soon as i graduate from college and finish grad/med school. I have been working since i was 15 and at this point, im tired of workin and going to school at the same time ( even tho i know it is a privilege). As the eldest daughter in an immigrant family i feel like ive taken on the adult role from an early age, so just working and worrying about myself will be blissful
I’m so proud of you 💟☮️ here’s some flowers :) 🌷🌼💐
I'm 23 and about to graduate college and join the workforce (engineering) and I'm stressed about getting a job before I graduate, but I look forward to it because a couple years ago I had a summer internship and only took 1 class and it was absolute bliss getting to go home at 5pm and have nothing to do (or rather have time to do whatever) for several hours. I have so many hobbies and things I want to learn and practice, I don't have a TV or game consoles so I can just focus on my interests and learn new things instead of being miserable trying to study, completing assignments, and working on projects just to get a C in a class.
I'm 22 in the same boat. I feel super under-qualified to be a software engineer and my resume is garbage but I'll give it a shot lol
I once read; “Don’t live through your trauma before it happens.”
So when I think of losing my cat I’ve raised throughout all of high school or my grandmother who raised me, that really helps me center myself in the present and enjoy my time with them while I can.
24 here and OH BOY being in your 20s is wild. So much changes so quickly and it's so hard to just.. figure shit out as you go. On top of that, I recently (like the past 5 months) learned that I am autistic 🙃 so like, thats a whole extra thing that I've been unearthing on top of just trying to survive regular existence lmao. The thought of being trapped in the same 9-5 until I die is worse than death itself imo. Another thing that's difficult to grapple with as you grow into adulthood is the realization that your parents are just humans. Like, seeing all of their traumas and issues and ways they haven't grown is really hard to come to terms with. Instead of the perfect, stable people I saw as a kid, I now see them for the regular humans that they are. Seeing eye to eye with your parents is a strange shift in perspective.
Being in your early twenties is a real pain, you're out of the house, you're figuring things out, you have college with lots of classes you don't want to take and the expenses that come with it, you have a menial public facing job that pays s*** with no autonomy and you're in an environment often that does not take you seriously, hell you cant even rent a car until you are 25. As someone who is beyond their twenties, it does get better as you develop and have a better understanding of this adulting world. It is important as you get older to understand were you came from as you enjoy some of the fruit of your hard work and don't forget what you had to struggle with and more importantly be empathetic towards the people who are coming in the the workforce and entering the real word from their parents household for the first time. Regardless of your age or generation, don't forget to have a little fun and enjoy the things that make you happy.
This is all ideally the case. I didn't leave home until 23 for school, didn't graduate until 27, and still have a menial public facing job that pays shit at almost 33.
Why is this sooo real for me. 😢 I hate working. I can't do this for the next 50 years. I need something more fulfilling but I don't even know what that is and how to get to it...
Hi there. Take some advice from an old guy (me). Your job doesn’t need to be fulfilling. Your income from your job should be enough for you to afford a fulfilling life on your personal time, away from the job. Hope that makes sense.
God this is so me, the idea of having to do this shit for most of my life is actually soul sucking. I get why we gotta do these things but man
@jamesfierro4309 is right!! U don't need a dream job, just something u can manage doing for however many hours a week that pays enough to support u doing what u rlly enjoy outside of it ❤️ Besides, the workforce isn't all dystopian! Once u end up somewhere satisfactory, you'll be getting to chat with friendly colleagues, work on solving problems & accomplishing tasks, enjoying a walk after yr lunch, listening to music/podcasts/books on yr commute, & hopefully doing some halfway meaningful work! It's something to do in yr day & it funds yr better life, the half with friends & games & holidays :) Hang in there & don't give up until u end up with such a job! U got this! ✨️
@stellarshakes Thank you both for saying this. You make it sound way more doable. I do need another job though cuz what I'm doing now really is not working for me. I'll make it happen. You're right. I totally got this 💪.
Jesus is the way. He will guide you, just ask him!
Crying over your parents getting older is so real, i cried with you lmao
Reminder to call your parents and to just check in with them
OMG, I can't believe this got recc to me literally 9 seconds after it was posted!
For me it was 2 minutes after
For me 30 minutes but i'm still early
i just wanted to watch a video before bed and i left crying
Same