The product sounds interesting but the free plan only gives you 100 note cards and 10 uploads. I would likely use that up in trying to reset one project. The other prices are really high for what it is offering but I will watch to see if their structure changes because it does look very interesting.
Non-binary teen here, thank you, just THANK YOU! This shall be my go-to edu video for my family from now on. Thank you so increadibly much!. Like, damn! This is simply BRILLIANT!
I turned 20 in 1977 and wore 70's print shirts, floral ties and flares. At 67 yrs old I get infuriated by the depressingly drab state of menswear departments. A couple of summers ago I wrote to Marks & Spencer and suggested someone wake the designers up. I feel male-bodied people are compelled to wander around in a constant state of funereal dullness.
Right!!! I'm a tailor by trade and I love looking at high fashion - men's fashion overall has gotten so freaking boring. At least in the 90s there was some remnant of that 80s camp and colour, but post 2000 all your clothing looks the same. I don't just want kids to be free to wear whatever they want without shame, I want y'all to be free to browse whatever clothing section you want and get your sense of style back! It's gotta be stifling as hell.
I have 3 kids (Nearly 4). My oldest recently decided they're non-binary after being painfully conflicted since they were 2.5 and a book asked "Are you a boy or a girl?" Resulting in years of crisis whenever it came up. We weren't prepared for it at all but handled it as well as we could by teaching about gender identities. My daughter and my youngest (Son) are the same size, and youngest will happily wear his sisters dresses, just as daughter will happily wear her brothers construction-vehicle outfits which are apparently "Too boyish for such a delicate girl". They USUALLY opt to go for their gender stereotypes, but are very happy and confident to just opt otherwise when they feel like it. Oldest has a mix of whatever. Whenever my kids are developmentally ready for it I tend to let them pick whatever the heck they want from wherever in clothing stores until I have a good grasp of their individual choice and can get some of it online and just get their approvals before I order it so I don't have to drag everyone around. 😂 As long as my kids are dressed appropriately for the weather, I honestly couldn't care less what they wear.
You sound like a wonderful parent and I think your kids are lucky to grow up in such an accepting household. As a non-binary teen myself, I might just say that it would be more accurate to say your oldest realized they were non-binary, as saying 'decided' makes it sound like a choice. ❤
@dasha_ucko You make a fair point there. Kiddo just tends to people that they "Finally decided" what they are. So it's the way my brain tends to go about it. I'll talk to kiddo tomorrow and ask how they'd like me to go about that. 🤔 We kept it quite flexible for a few years and just waited for kiddo to find what felt right fully understanding it was clearly not birth-assigned gender. Tried to use name instead of pronouns wherever possible whilst in that unknown phase. And now we're working on trying to accommodate kiddo to have their own room as to not need to share with other gender-identities because we know it can be quite hard on NB kiddos and teens. We try, and just have to hope along the way that even if we don't get it right our littles know we've always listened to them above everything and tried our best with what we have. 😅
Thank you for mentioning people with intellectual and cognitive disabilities in your discussion of infantilization-it’s so important and often gets left out of disability discussions on the internet.
When I worked in an institute for children->young adults (ages 3-21) with "heavy" disabilities (doesn't translate well) the first thing I was told was to: always speak to them as you would someone in their age group, because we have no idea how much they understand (non-verbal), and we're not going to be disrespectful Will admit I had an easier job of this because I was placed with the 3-5 year-olds, who were a lot more in line with my brain's idea of how this age behaves. That attitude was a big part of why I decided to work there
@@zigzagperson Doesn't it make far more sense to follow the people's interests or what they seem to engage with more than treating them as per any age in particular? I would imagine a non-verbal adult might get bored or frustrated if you tried to have an intellectual conversation with them the same way you might with a neurotypical person their age. I'm by no means an expert in the care of people with intellectual disabilities, but I would be inclined to talk to them more softly and slowly at first, and then gauge their reaction and meet them where they're at, more calm vs excited as they are, and follow the subjects or activities they seem to like. I don't really see how it should vary by age, but more so vary by how they interact.
Seeing all those unkind comments in the video really makes me appreciative of this online community. Most people make the most insightful supportive comments. ❤️
Yes, this. I have no interest in fomenting anger and hate, nor in supporting channels that do so. Jessica is a clear example of the fact that it doesn't have to be like that, and it's one of the many things I've liked about her channel for years. We've been following her journey for a long time now, and the way that she handles life with quiet strength and how her family has grown in closeness and love has been lovely to witness. Whoever keeps track of the comments for her does a great job of keeping the discourse positive and civil.
At 3 years old one of my twins shouted, "I'm a birl" randomly while i was driving. I asked what's a birl, and they said, "I'm not a boy, I'm not a girl, I'm a birl..." I just thought this was so beautiful, they were creating language to be seen and to be true to themselves. Kids know who they are, it's the world that tries to tell them otherwise. Also, just cant stress more how wonderful it is to be here in likeminded space especially considering the chaos that is the internet 💜✨️
I know a guy who gives of very strong 'male vibes' who dressed his son in 'girl clothes'. This had nothing to do with any sort of so-called 'gender ideology', his first child was a girl and he saw no reason not to re-use clothing that was in good shape.
My oldest Nephew got obsessed, like many other kids, with Frozen (Frost in swedish). So he wanted Elsas dress for christmas last year. He did indeed get one and put it on at once to run around with. And I felt so proud about him not being restricted by feminine or masculine ideas. Granted he spilled ice cream over it like ten minutes later and had to change, but he was still happy lol.
Years ago, at our pre-school, one of the students really really wanted to be Elsa at a costume party. Before the event, his mom had us to read everyone a book about a boy who wore a dress, and any of the people who laughed at him were turned into nuts. His dad came as Anna. Little sister was Olaf and mom was the reindeer. I'm so glad it eventually got easier for kids to be whoever they are, but now our culture seems to be switching back to a time where there is no respect for anyone.
Excellent point about the infantilization of the disabled (particularly the intellectually disabled). Although not intellectually disabled myself, I am developmentally disabled (AuDHD), and the way society has conditioned people to see Autistics as eternal children is revolting. That’s why it’s important to have zero tolerance for saviorist hate groups, like Autism Speaks, which thrive by portraying Autistic people as without voice or agency. Unfortunately, those in power still (and will probably always) listen to them and not us, because of how ingrained in society that infantilization is.
Loving the historical context here! And as a woman who predominantly wears trousers/shorts because I find them more practical, it's fun to hear the opposite perspective: that for some people, skirts/dresses are the more practical option. Absolutely each to their own! In my case, I tend to find that a) my preferred field of work can involve a lot of going up ladders and/or crawling around on the floor underneath desks, so trousers mean I'm not worrying about any risk of accidental flashing, and b) I really like having large, functional pockets and the only category of clothing I can generally find with those are trousers/shorts sold in the men's section (provided they're available in a small enough size for me) - while skirts with pockets absolutely exist, they're just that much more difficult to find in the first place and I rarely feel like putting in that effort for a garment I'm not going to wear often
I've found that it really depends on what kind of skirt you get, I liked skirts as a kid until I (a) started needing pockets and (b) started developing "chub rub" friction burns every time I wore something that didn't fully cover the area where my thighs rubbed together while walking or running. (I now wear athletic shorts underneath to prevent this.) I also started disliking how skirts looked on me because none of the loose ones had any structure and the tight ones made me feel like I was on display for anyone who wanted an eyeful. My current favorite skirt is a big wool one that completely obscures my lower half and has MASSIVE pockets!
There is actually a lot of photography of young children in the late 1800s and early 1900s of boys and girls, toddlers, wearing "dresses" with curls. It was a common practice even then because it had to do with practicality and cleaning.
Ohhhh youre so right that its not just kids. Im middle aged, afab agender, and have experimented with wearing dresses and suits in professional situations, and i get treated with so much more respect in trousers, it's shocking. And yeah dresses are often more comfortable so i have to choose physical comfort v gender expression comfort v being perceived as a real human being. Sigh.
Jessica, I love how you always make videos filled with education so much fun to watch too!! As a trans person I’ve always thought the gendering of clothes was ridiculous and I’m so glad we’re breaking it down with/for the next generation. Your videos always make me feel so comforted when I’m having a flare up or not feeling good about my identity so thank you for making these amazing videos!! All three of y’all’s outfits are always absolutely on point!! Much love 💜
One very practical aspect that's always struck me about breeching, that I appreciate you discussing, is the fact that it generally occurred around the time a little one is most likely to be able to use the toilet (or historical equivalent) independently. It makes sense to introduce a bifurcated garment that isn't laundered as frequently as a white frock would be when a caregiver is confident that a child isn't going to regularly have accidents! People can stop clutching their pearls, it's practical!
@@rruthlessly So, quick note, I said that the ages for breeching (as Jessica said in the video, usually between 4 and 7) are the ages kids are most likely using the toilet *independently,* not when toilet training would begin. Different kids are able to take of basic bodily functions without needing help from an adult at different ages, so yes, I do think that achieving independence in that area was a contributing factor to determining when a child could or should be breeched. Could happen earlier, could take a little longer, just like today. Another thing to keep in mind is the way clothes were made; clothing for toddlers and preschoolers today are likely to have elastic waistbands and few closures, meaning younger children can dress themselves with relative ease. Buttons, ties, and hook closures are tricky for little kids to manage. So for me, that reinforces the idea that children would be breeched when they had not only been toilet trained, but also had the manual dexterity needed to manage their clothes' fasteners as well. Again, all of this tradition can be seen as largely practical, but also ties into this idea of "maturity" as a time of increased physical independence, the ableism of that way of thinkin Jessica addresses in the video as well.
I used to work at a museum with dress ups, and many of the boys wanted a fairy costume (flying! Magic!). Some parents would panic, tell them off, and find a more "masculine" costume like an animal...?
There is this one lady online that had 5 boys. Only two of them have long hair amd the youngest likes to have pretty bows and such put into his hair. The comments are mostly supportive but there are of course also always some assholes who have to share their unnecessary opinions. My "fave" was a person saying that long hair isn't a problem for boys but the bows just make them confused and possibly trans or at least gay. These people have clearly never been to any metal concert or goth festival where a lot of attendees have long hair and a few always wear kilts or something otherwise dress or skirt like. A lot of goth men also wear make-up and style their hair. None of these things are problematic, clothes are for whoever fits into them. I don't care who wears or doesn't wear dresses as long as they feel comfortable in them.
My grandparents didn't have many photographs of their children because of the cost of a camera but I do remember them having one taken of my uncle by a photography studio, at the age he was able to sit up and toddle about. He was absolutely wearing a dress. I think he was born in the late 1930s. Also my grandad loved fashion and menswear has become so incredibly boring since he was a young, to middle aged adult. He was the one that taught me the importance of looking for a really good print, ideally silk lining on waistcoats, how to tie different knots in ties, the value of a really good pair of shoes and how to walk with a cane (for fashion, not disability). He was quite the dandy!
I liked very much when you mentioned “the right of autonomy” for the kids. I absolutely hated when I was a child and my mother would dress me with a dress or a skirt. I disliked it so much that now that I can buy my own clothes, I do not own a single dress or skirt (cis straight woman here). And it’s not that I don’t find dresses gorgeous, they look stunning in many people, but they are just not for me 😊
Honestly, my experience is really similar to yours! The only exception that I do about skirts or dresses is if they are made by me❤ I like to sew (I learnt mostly because I like "fashion" and cosplay) and when I create a skirt or a dress by myself I feel more willing to wear it because I'm proud of my own work and I like to wear something that I have put energy on. But overall dresses or skirts are not for me too!
Back in the day both boys and girls wore dresses up to the end of infancy (that's up to age 6 btw. 7-13 you were a juvenile and 14 - 20 you were an adolescent). Way back in the day infants of both sexes were called girls; boys sometimes called 'knave girls'.
As someone who was brought up in the 70s, all I remember is the colour brown for clothes, I don't think I thought of clothes as either boys or girls, and I'm sure my brother had my hand me downs.❤
70's child, here. Everything was either brown or dark colors mixed with brown: clothes, cars, wood paneling, furniture fabric, appliances... Good times.
There was WAY too much brown, often paired with orange, but I also remember a lot of yellow t-shirts. In fact, if ever I see a yellow t-shirt, it takes me back to my childhood. As it was my favourite colour, I had red everything, if I could get it.
I am currently reading a book about Leonardo Davinci and practically everyone in his paintings look androgynous to my uneducated eye. I have been surprised more than once to find out that someone who looked very feminine to me was actually very clearly a man actually. Although in one case in his Last Supper painting apparently there was some debate whether one of the people was actually Mary or John (turns out it was John), so even the people who study this stuff aren't always sure.
Interesting bit about He-Man and She-Ra. As an AMAB child (who now identifies as nonbinary as a middle-aged adult), I watched both shows and played with both toy lines. My parents even bought me both the Castle Greyskull and Crystal Castle playsets. I also watched and played with “My Little Pony” toys. I’m glad my parents were progressive in that way, although it still took me decades to realize I wasn’t cisgender.
That's what I love about Lolita fashion, it was started in Japan by feminists reclaiming femininity ❤ Today people of all genders are welcomed by the community, whether they dress in the feminine or masculine (ouji or dandy) versions
I'm one of a pair of fraternal twins, born in the early70's. My parents bought unisex clothes because it was easier with a pair of "hyperactive" twins to just grab a shirt or pair of pants into which they'd stuff the first wiggly child they were able to catch, regardless of whether it was me or my brother. They avoided dressing us "twinny" except for family photos, but my chronically ill mom did not often waste her rare spoons on gendered clothes - again, except for special occasions.
When my littlest saw Encanto, he fell in love with Mirabel's style and we got him a skirt that he wore multiple times to school, etc. Ya know what? It was fun.
I showed him this comment, and his response was: Oh, yeah! I should wash that and wear it again! We are very fortunate to be living in an area where the schools are very intolerant of bullying. They are taught acceptance and compassion from early on, and it definitely shows. My high schooler, who is queer, has had (in his words) almost no negative repercussions from his peers from coming out. It's even more impressive when you consider that there are an almost equal number of Harris and Drumpf signs in our community, disturbingly enough.
I grew up in the '60s. When GI Joe came out in around "65, us kids were somewhat shocked to see a doll for boys. It was meant to be played with the same as one would with a Barbie. Years later, I thought it was really weird hearing my friend's kid ask if she'd seen his "He Man Doll".
My sister who is not a doll person used to dismissively refer to my younger brothers action man collection as his dollies, & that was half a century ago so I find all the pearl clutching by people with fragile identities both perplexing and amusing
I loved when my Brothers GI Joe dolls got passed down to me. He had the best accessories! And my Barbies needed brothers. (It never occurred to me to make couples with my Barbies and GI Joes.)
Unfortunately the relatives we have that think clothing should be gendered don't really care about the history, so this was just fun for me to watch. Fortunately they do care about us in general, so they don't say these things directly to our kid, so that's good
The major difference now a days is some adults have the stereotype sherly temple image in their head about girls in tutu dresses showing their diapers instead of "its just a baby, it's loud, it's messy. Put it in a long shirt they can keep using till they are 2 or 3." No, instead they have puffy annoying dresses made of the worst itchy rash induced fabrics for girls & boys get comfy soft cotton clothes.
I have fraternal twins, they are both girls but I discovered when they were very young that many strangers would try and figure out "which one's the boy", I found it fascinating the cues that these people would latch on. Not just skirt/trousers, pink/blue but also pictures/stripes, blue/neon. In fact I think there is a whole stupid complexity of what colours and patterns are seen as more feminine - e.g. is pink camo culturally more feminine than blue flowers I don't know but I bet if you dressed 3yo fraternal twins in them and walked around a park you'd find out strangers are pretty consistent in which they decide "is the boy".
Would they try and stop a Roman Soldier or a Scots mercenary from wearing what they pleased? 😂 I think not. Oh for the time humanity rises above its ridiculous garbage. Let people be. And they dressed little boy like girls for certain pictures when I was a child too.
Exactly. Honestly, like just where? What makes you comfortable and if anyone has a problem with it, they can build a barge and get over it. That is exactly how things should they and my people can murder what they want, where whatever makes them countable, and if anyone has a problem with it, then get over it.
Yup. I think I have a picture of my father in a dress. Or rather that picture is still at my mother's place. That would have been somewhere from 1934 - 1940.
I live near Amish country (you know, the most old-fashioned people around) and they dress their kids in tiny versions of women's clothing until they're at least old enough to walk around. It's so ignorant of history to claim that dressing children in a gender-ambiguous manner is a new thing!
I did not score well on the game. I figured it was going to be a "trick question" where all of the children were boys. Reduced cost of postage, which lead to the widespread sending of Christmas cards, lead into the celebration of birthdays? I would watch a video on that topic as well!
I find the ‘mom’ character in the playroom to have a really interesting aesthetic. She’s wearing a t-shirt (modern) with a vintage-looking skirt, which together nevertheless create a cohesive look.
I was born in the 1970'ś and of course had a lot of clothes of my older siblings. For me the "we used to be able to distinguish boys from girls" feels so ridiculous. I have pity for the kids these days - it seems difficult to find pretty colours in the midst of the excessive gender coding.
I remember stories of my own father being, "made to wear a dress as a child," as though it were some kind of tradgic backstory. (The only genuinly tradgic part is that I never got a change to ask him personally about it or anything else because I was an infant myself when he passed away.) In reality, my paternal grandparents simply had a fixation on the aristocracy and wanted to appear upper class, so they observed the (now truly archaic) British tradition of clothing young children in dresses regardless of gender.
I have a picture of my dad when he was a small child wearing a dress. It was just a thing. And as a young girl, I was never allowed to wear slacks because people would tell my mom what a well mannered son she had. geesh
A really good video! As someone who works in childcare, I have conversations about clothes and gender fairly often. Nice to have some more historical references for reflective thought.
They need to check out the Korean groups Ateez and Stray Kids.. never met a crop top they wouldn't wear.. Seonghwa from Ateez wears dresses in the regular and they all wear dresses... Tbh if people have an issue with it I always assume that they are not secure in their own skin!
1:15 1: Girl 2: Boy 3: Boy 4: Boys? Oh dear this definietly seems like I'm guessing boy too often... am I overcompensating? 5: One boy. Result: I thought Jessica was saying number 4 were both the same gender, but I would have guessed right if hadn't misunderstood that, so I'm giving myself two points. Also I didn't realise we were meant to be guessing for the standing child in the first picture, so I had no guess for that. Three points so far. And that's three points in total. Or five if it's a point per child in the last picture.
loved it..although maybe you should look up abby cox and the real history of the corset? You can breath in corsets just fine. There are tons of clothes historians on youtube that has done a lot of great work on this.
I remember the X book. I think that there was also a segment in the movie, "Free to Be"(?) I need to look this up later, but Marlo Thomas was the producer.
In my early 80ies' childhood in the GDR, all children in first kindergarten year (3-4 years old) wore pinafores. In second and third year, they were required to wear either a skirt or trousers under the pinafore, but if you didn't wear long trousers, all children alike looked like the wore cute little dresses. We didn't look like small adults in small adult's clothing - we were children in children's clothing which was way less gendered than it is today. Bright colours and little flowers, cars, balls, animals or abstract patterns. This changed not until the nineties and nowadays children's pinafores are nowhere to be found, which is a shame in my opinion. Pinafores are so practical and cute. But, what I wanted to say - this "little boys wear "girl's clothing"" isn't a thing of as far back as you maybe think. We didn't regard it as "girl's clothing" - it was "children's clothing".
* laughs in elder sibling * My brother got most of my hand-me-downs, which, lucky for him I guess, was probably helped by the fact that I had been basically raised shopping in the boy's/men's clothing department. I had a bunch of granny dresses and whatnot from the thrift store (and a legit Gunnysax in like 1993), but jeans and jackets - usually from the men's dept 🤷 Some folks are just ridiculous - if the person is in clothing fit for purpose/environment, who cares 🤦
I've never understood the problem. Men can wear kilts and I find it a nice look. A friend of my son's is responsible for the school handbook saying boys can't wear dresses because he wore dresses and looked smashing! He had style. If young boys, especially, want to wear dresses, let them. If my daughters wanted to wear jeans or overalls, I let them. It's just a specific group of people telling everyone else how they want us to dress, because they've always gotten away with it. Now that their apple carts are being upended, they're getting testy.
I just got a book for the kids at the library where I work called UPSTAGED. It is a graphic novel and the main character is non binary. It is interesting to see how they dress and what choices they make to express their gender. I love it and the kids do to. I always want to show the kids, mirrors, windows, and doors to the world.
I've never understood why a person feels the need to police what another wears. As soon as your child is able to talk and walk, they should be allowed to make their own decisions on what to wear, be that a skirt or shorts, feminine or masculine.
Please make a collab with Karolina Zebrowska one day ^^ Can't say much about clothes, but you know how they say that girls tend to go for dolls and such even as babies while boys prefer cars etc.? Well, my niece, 1y1m old, has a slew of toys inherited from all the male and female children who came before her in our family, and she plays with it all indiscriminately. The most, of course, with stuff that wasn't intended to be a toy. Naturally ;)
My toddler is getting to the point where he consistently has an answer for the "are you a boy or girl" question. Its always some version of "neither". We've never pushed, swayed, or coerced his choices. He knows what he likes and what he doesn't (pants are the devil, but dresses with leggings are okay). I've always allowed choice and variety in the things he does, plays with, and wears. All that's resulted in from my point of view is a child who is better at being able to voice his own opinions. As a non-binary adult myself, this is all I could've wished for as a child (that and parents to not force me to wear dresses). I never knew why I felt wrong in my clothes and in general as a "girl" because I was never allowed to choose anything regarding my outward presentstion until I had a job. I don't have an earthly clue what my child's gender may be, but I genuinely don't care because I have a child who is expressive, creative, and has a strong sense of what he likes. The rest of it is labels that he can figure out later if he so chooses
Okay, the 1:28 guess was tricky for me because it looks very similar to the childhood portrait of king Władysław IV Vasa of Poland by Marcin Kober. Only further proves the point of the video though
Yep, used to buy men's jeans in mid 70s. I am a very tall woman and wore a 36" inseam. Only down side to men's jeans was the fit at the waist. Women's bodies are different from men. In kids, not much difference there.
Have you ever done a video about the one-sex theory as opposed to two-sex theory (i.e. humoral theory that humans are all one sex and internal heat partially masculinizes fetuses into boys and then a second phase of heat turns boys into men at puberty, versus males and females are totally different, almost different species from conception)? I feel like the fall of one-sex theory vs two-sex theory is intertwined with the practice of breeching, and as the two-sex theory became more prominent, the age of breeching went down, we got the skeleton suit, etc. And the rise of two-sex theory is also intertwined with interesting gender ideology in the 18th century, etc., it could make an interesting video! And I personally find it interesting how, while nowadays we know about the presence of chromosomes from birth, we also know that all humans are sensitive to all sex hormones and we’ve observed the fluidity of biology in response to infusion of hormones, in the womb, at puberty, and at other times in the case of trans people etc. idk, just rambling, but maybe there would be something interesting there.
As far as adults are concerned, we have only to look at other cultures in today's world. No one would question why men in Saudi Arabia wear kaftans. They are essentially very long, white dresses, by Western standards. And certainly no one would question why men in Scotland wear kilts. They are essentially a skirt, by Western standards. In the 1970's, the Women's Lib Movement told men, "Get in touch with the feminine side of yourself." So, why is society so disturbed by the fact that men did exactly that? To understand women better, men have not only gotten "in touch with their feminine side", but, by transitioning, have gained a better female perspective. People should stop criticizing fashion choices and mind their own damn business!
My father was born in the mid 1940s in Ankara, Turkey. He was a surprise youngest child. We only have two pictures of him before the age of 5, and in both he has long hair and is wearing a white dress.
That photograph of the young boy with the long blonde hair and in all white was actually of Teddy Roosevelt, as in Roughriders, National Park-establishing, Teddy bear-namesake Teddy Roosevelt.
Sadly i dont have time rn to watch the Video, but i had two lovely Femboy BF'S and they both looked so cute, hot and adorable in dresses and skirts, even better than me (a girl). All people regarding of gender or sex have the right to look pretty.
I would like to point out one tiny extra shade of meaning please? The adult babies were usually Jesus specifically. This was because of a doctrine at the time that was about Jesus being an adult consciousness in a baby body, so that’s why they drew him that way. Could the lovely Catholic people help me out here? Do you know the doctrine? 🙏🏻 I’m not sure how that effects your point, but I hope the data is useful.
You just called them "breeches." Since many words these days are based on pronunciation evolution of older words, is it possible that this is where the word "britches" comes from?
Hi! This comment is a bit off-topic, but I was a bit surprised to see other kids' faces unblurred in your video.. I understand that their parents decided it was okay to post their kids' videos online and obviously they're the primary problem (because in my opinion, yes it is an issue that a child who can't possibly consent to this be exposed on the internet for the rest of time), but doesn't reposting these images make you share a small part of responsibility ? Considering the reasons you blur Rupert's face are the same for the other kids as well. No hate, just a concern I felt was important to share, I hope you have a good day!
Interesting, I hadn’t thought about this. I think there certainly is a difference between showing Rupert and showing stock images of kids (I assume that’s what you’re referencing), since Rupert is not anonymous in the same way that these kids are. And no one is watching a video specifically to see stock images of kids in the same way people watch family vloggers for their children. But that doesn’t mean these stock image kids aren’t being exploited in some way. Not sure where I land on this one.
And then there's the Scottish kilt. A skirt specifically intended to be worn by men. I recall once seeing a Scottish "strong man" contest on TV, featuring men in kilts competing at such feats as balancing what looked like a phone pole upright on their hands and tossing it up to count the end-over-end flips. Hyper-masculine to the limit. How could a demiboy like me possibly have not enjoyed that?
Jessica, I agree with raising children to realize that whether clothing and fabrics is masculine or feminine is a social construct. Also, boys wore dresses for far more years than they haven’t. Curious, though, Jessica is that you clearly go out of your way to wear typically feminine clothes and fabrics and colors. You look fabulous doing so, but do you ever make a point for your son to see you in more masculine clothing, colors, pants so he can see you living your points about clothing?
She's wearing a T-shirt and trousers in the video as well - and she has spoken before about how chronic fatigue can make it difficult for her to dress up some days, so I would assume so.
Is the point not that you can wear what you like? Which is dresses for her. Claudia, his other mother, also dresses as she likes which is usually trousers .
I agree with the above response. I think what that first commenter is suggesting is to model/encourage dressing in an on average culturally gender neutral way. Unfortunately, it seems to me that that would require parents to pretend they don't have stylistic preferences, which arguably defeats the original purpose. Adopting a "wear what it is you prefer, regardless of cultural gender expectations, just like I do", and modelling being respectful of others' preferences, including the child's, seems like a better aligned approach.
Yeah no, we still use them in ceremonial situations all the time. The church, the courts, you just didn't register them as dresses because those things are completely normalized even today (because you know... we came from the UK initially, so it makes sense the fashion followed). But even as recently as the 40s there are plenty of photographs of babies and toddlers in gowns, no matter the gender.
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Thank you so much for the special excellence with which you produce content. It’s really gratifying and fun to watch. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Lovely video! I'm a bit confused why a little trans girl is featured in your thumbnail? (themcleodfamily, Diana is openly trans)
The product sounds interesting but the free plan only gives you 100 note cards and 10 uploads. I would likely use that up in trying to reset one project. The other prices are really high for what it is offering but I will watch to see if their structure changes because it does look very interesting.
I love that you tackle ignorance and prejudice with knowledge and comedy. This is the way!
Thank you 🙌
Superb point.❤
@@jessicaoutofthecloset Indeed. It's part of what I've always liked about your channel.
Non-binary teen here, thank you, just THANK YOU! This shall be my go-to edu video for my family from now on. Thank you so increadibly much!. Like, damn! This is simply BRILLIANT!
I turned 20 in 1977 and wore 70's print shirts, floral ties and flares. At 67 yrs old I get infuriated by the depressingly drab state of menswear departments. A couple of summers ago I wrote to Marks & Spencer and suggested someone wake the designers up. I feel male-bodied people are compelled to wander around in a constant state of funereal dullness.
Right!!! I'm a tailor by trade and I love looking at high fashion - men's fashion overall has gotten so freaking boring. At least in the 90s there was some remnant of that 80s camp and colour, but post 2000 all your clothing looks the same. I don't just want kids to be free to wear whatever they want without shame, I want y'all to be free to browse whatever clothing section you want and get your sense of style back! It's gotta be stifling as hell.
I have 3 kids (Nearly 4). My oldest recently decided they're non-binary after being painfully conflicted since they were 2.5 and a book asked "Are you a boy or a girl?" Resulting in years of crisis whenever it came up. We weren't prepared for it at all but handled it as well as we could by teaching about gender identities.
My daughter and my youngest (Son) are the same size, and youngest will happily wear his sisters dresses, just as daughter will happily wear her brothers construction-vehicle outfits which are apparently "Too boyish for such a delicate girl". They USUALLY opt to go for their gender stereotypes, but are very happy and confident to just opt otherwise when they feel like it. Oldest has a mix of whatever.
Whenever my kids are developmentally ready for it I tend to let them pick whatever the heck they want from wherever in clothing stores until I have a good grasp of their individual choice and can get some of it online and just get their approvals before I order it so I don't have to drag everyone around. 😂
As long as my kids are dressed appropriately for the weather, I honestly couldn't care less what they wear.
You sound like a wonderful parent and I think your kids are lucky to grow up in such an accepting household. As a non-binary teen myself, I might just say that it would be more accurate to say your oldest realized they were non-binary, as saying 'decided' makes it sound like a choice. ❤
@dasha_ucko You make a fair point there. Kiddo just tends to people that they "Finally decided" what they are. So it's the way my brain tends to go about it. I'll talk to kiddo tomorrow and ask how they'd like me to go about that. 🤔 We kept it quite flexible for a few years and just waited for kiddo to find what felt right fully understanding it was clearly not birth-assigned gender. Tried to use name instead of pronouns wherever possible whilst in that unknown phase. And now we're working on trying to accommodate kiddo to have their own room as to not need to share with other gender-identities because we know it can be quite hard on NB kiddos and teens. We try, and just have to hope along the way that even if we don't get it right our littles know we've always listened to them above everything and tried our best with what we have. 😅
@staceyhunt6769 That totally makes sense, and in that case I stand corrected. I wish my parents were more like you!
Thank you for mentioning people with intellectual and cognitive disabilities in your discussion of infantilization-it’s so important and often gets left out of disability discussions on the internet.
When I worked in an institute for children->young adults (ages 3-21) with "heavy" disabilities (doesn't translate well) the first thing I was told was to: always speak to them as you would someone in their age group, because we have no idea how much they understand (non-verbal), and we're not going to be disrespectful
Will admit I had an easier job of this because I was placed with the 3-5 year-olds, who were a lot more in line with my brain's idea of how this age behaves.
That attitude was a big part of why I decided to work there
@@zigzagperson Doesn't it make far more sense to follow the people's interests or what they seem to engage with more than treating them as per any age in particular? I would imagine a non-verbal adult might get bored or frustrated if you tried to have an intellectual conversation with them the same way you might with a neurotypical person their age. I'm by no means an expert in the care of people with intellectual disabilities, but I would be inclined to talk to them more softly and slowly at first, and then gauge their reaction and meet them where they're at, more calm vs excited as they are, and follow the subjects or activities they seem to like. I don't really see how it should vary by age, but more so vary by how they interact.
Seeing all those unkind comments in the video really makes me appreciative of this online community. Most people make the most insightful supportive comments. ❤️
Yes, this. I have no interest in fomenting anger and hate, nor in supporting channels that do so. Jessica is a clear example of the fact that it doesn't have to be like that, and it's one of the many things I've liked about her channel for years. We've been following her journey for a long time now, and the way that she handles life with quiet strength and how her family has grown in closeness and love has been lovely to witness. Whoever keeps track of the comments for her does a great job of keeping the discourse positive and civil.
At 3 years old one of my twins shouted, "I'm a birl" randomly while i was driving. I asked what's a birl, and they said, "I'm not a boy, I'm not a girl, I'm a birl..." I just thought this was so beautiful, they were creating language to be seen and to be true to themselves. Kids know who they are, it's the world that tries to tell them otherwise. Also, just cant stress more how wonderful it is to be here in likeminded space especially considering the chaos that is the internet 💜✨️
That's so sweet! Love the term birl!
I know a guy who gives of very strong 'male vibes' who dressed his son in 'girl clothes'. This had nothing to do with any sort of so-called 'gender ideology', his first child was a girl and he saw no reason not to re-use clothing that was in good shape.
My oldest Nephew got obsessed, like many other kids, with Frozen (Frost in swedish). So he wanted Elsas dress for christmas last year. He did indeed get one and put it on at once to run around with. And I felt so proud about him not being restricted by feminine or masculine ideas. Granted he spilled ice cream over it like ten minutes later and had to change, but he was still happy lol.
Years ago, at our pre-school, one of the students really really wanted to be Elsa at a costume party. Before the event, his mom had us to read everyone a book about a boy who wore a dress, and any of the people who laughed at him were turned into nuts. His dad came as Anna. Little sister was Olaf and mom was the reindeer. I'm so glad it eventually got easier for kids to be whoever they are, but now our culture seems to be switching back to a time where there is no respect for anyone.
Excellent point about the infantilization of the disabled (particularly the intellectually disabled). Although not intellectually disabled myself, I am developmentally disabled (AuDHD), and the way society has conditioned people to see Autistics as eternal children is revolting. That’s why it’s important to have zero tolerance for saviorist hate groups, like Autism Speaks, which thrive by portraying Autistic people as without voice or agency. Unfortunately, those in power still (and will probably always) listen to them and not us, because of how ingrained in society that infantilization is.
Somewhere before WW2 all babies wore dresses before school days.
Even into the 50s.
My granny brought my mum white dresses for her first baby, because that’s what she said babies all wear dresses until they are older!
We have a gorgeous photo of my grandad as toddler in a dress and with long ringleted hair.
is this meant to be negative or positive? i genuinely do not understand tone...
Loving the historical context here! And as a woman who predominantly wears trousers/shorts because I find them more practical, it's fun to hear the opposite perspective: that for some people, skirts/dresses are the more practical option. Absolutely each to their own! In my case, I tend to find that a) my preferred field of work can involve a lot of going up ladders and/or crawling around on the floor underneath desks, so trousers mean I'm not worrying about any risk of accidental flashing, and b) I really like having large, functional pockets and the only category of clothing I can generally find with those are trousers/shorts sold in the men's section (provided they're available in a small enough size for me) - while skirts with pockets absolutely exist, they're just that much more difficult to find in the first place and I rarely feel like putting in that effort for a garment I'm not going to wear often
I've found that it really depends on what kind of skirt you get, I liked skirts as a kid until I (a) started needing pockets and (b) started developing "chub rub" friction burns every time I wore something that didn't fully cover the area where my thighs rubbed together while walking or running. (I now wear athletic shorts underneath to prevent this.) I also started disliking how skirts looked on me because none of the loose ones had any structure and the tight ones made me feel like I was on display for anyone who wanted an eyeful. My current favorite skirt is a big wool one that completely obscures my lower half and has MASSIVE pockets!
There is actually a lot of photography of young children in the late 1800s and early 1900s of boys and girls, toddlers, wearing "dresses" with curls. It was a common practice even then because it had to do with practicality and cleaning.
Leaving a comment for the algorithm. Absolutely amazing video
Ohhhh youre so right that its not just kids. Im middle aged, afab agender, and have experimented with wearing dresses and suits in professional situations, and i get treated with so much more respect in trousers, it's shocking. And yeah dresses are often more comfortable so i have to choose physical comfort v gender expression comfort v being perceived as a real human being. Sigh.
The modern fashion industry has a lot to do with how we dress as it pushes the next season styles and fashions on to us
Jessica, I love how you always make videos filled with education so much fun to watch too!! As a trans person I’ve always thought the gendering of clothes was ridiculous and I’m so glad we’re breaking it down with/for the next generation. Your videos always make me feel so comforted when I’m having a flare up or not feeling good about my identity so thank you for making these amazing videos!! All three of y’all’s outfits are always absolutely on point!! Much love 💜
One very practical aspect that's always struck me about breeching, that I appreciate you discussing, is the fact that it generally occurred around the time a little one is most likely to be able to use the toilet (or historical equivalent) independently. It makes sense to introduce a bifurcated garment that isn't laundered as frequently as a white frock would be when a caregiver is confident that a child isn't going to regularly have accidents! People can stop clutching their pearls, it's practical!
That makes a lot of sense actually...
Do you think that 7 was a normal age for toilet training when it was a normal age for breeching?
@@rruthlessly So, quick note, I said that the ages for breeching (as Jessica said in the video, usually between 4 and 7) are the ages kids are most likely using the toilet *independently,* not when toilet training would begin. Different kids are able to take of basic bodily functions without needing help from an adult at different ages, so yes, I do think that achieving independence in that area was a contributing factor to determining when a child could or should be breeched. Could happen earlier, could take a little longer, just like today.
Another thing to keep in mind is the way clothes were made; clothing for toddlers and preschoolers today are likely to have elastic waistbands and few closures, meaning younger children can dress themselves with relative ease. Buttons, ties, and hook closures are tricky for little kids to manage. So for me, that reinforces the idea that children would be breeched when they had not only been toilet trained, but also had the manual dexterity needed to manage their clothes' fasteners as well. Again, all of this tradition can be seen as largely practical, but also ties into this idea of "maturity" as a time of increased physical independence, the ableism of that way of thinkin Jessica addresses in the video as well.
I used to work at a museum with dress ups, and many of the boys wanted a fairy costume (flying! Magic!). Some parents would panic, tell them off, and find a more "masculine" costume like an animal...?
There is this one lady online that had 5 boys. Only two of them have long hair amd the youngest likes to have pretty bows and such put into his hair. The comments are mostly supportive but there are of course also always some assholes who have to share their unnecessary opinions. My "fave" was a person saying that long hair isn't a problem for boys but the bows just make them confused and possibly trans or at least gay. These people have clearly never been to any metal concert or goth festival where a lot of attendees have long hair and a few always wear kilts or something otherwise dress or skirt like. A lot of goth men also wear make-up and style their hair.
None of these things are problematic, clothes are for whoever fits into them. I don't care who wears or doesn't wear dresses as long as they feel comfortable in them.
My grandparents didn't have many photographs of their children because of the cost of a camera but I do remember them having one taken of my uncle by a photography studio, at the age he was able to sit up and toddle about. He was absolutely wearing a dress. I think he was born in the late 1930s. Also my grandad loved fashion and menswear has become so incredibly boring since he was a young, to middle aged adult. He was the one that taught me the importance of looking for a really good print, ideally silk lining on waistcoats, how to tie different knots in ties, the value of a really good pair of shoes and how to walk with a cane (for fashion, not disability). He was quite the dandy!
I liked very much when you mentioned “the right of autonomy” for the kids. I absolutely hated when I was a child and my mother would dress me with a dress or a skirt. I disliked it so much that now that I can buy my own clothes, I do not own a single dress or skirt (cis straight woman here). And it’s not that I don’t find dresses gorgeous, they look stunning in many people, but they are just not for me 😊
Honestly, my experience is really similar to yours! The only exception that I do about skirts or dresses is if they are made by me❤ I like to sew (I learnt mostly because I like "fashion" and cosplay) and when I create a skirt or a dress by myself I feel more willing to wear it because I'm proud of my own work and I like to wear something that I have put energy on. But overall dresses or skirts are not for me too!
Back in the day both boys and girls wore dresses up to the end of infancy (that's up to age 6 btw. 7-13 you were a juvenile and 14 - 20 you were an adolescent). Way back in the day infants of both sexes were called girls; boys sometimes called 'knave girls'.
Someone who says "but it'll confuse the children" has never spent time with any child.
As someone who was brought up in the 70s, all I remember is the colour brown for clothes, I don't think I thought of clothes as either boys or girls, and I'm sure my brother had my hand me downs.❤
70's child, here. Everything was either brown or dark colors mixed with brown: clothes, cars, wood paneling, furniture fabric, appliances... Good times.
There was WAY too much brown, often paired with orange, but I also remember a lot of yellow t-shirts. In fact, if ever I see a yellow t-shirt, it takes me back to my childhood.
As it was my favourite colour, I had red everything, if I could get it.
I remember lots of orange and brown striped clothing.
@@jennifers5560 And furniture.
“Like the sims … we spin around and are suddenly… a foot taller” - when I tell you I screamed 🤣🤣🤣 excellent video, Jessica!! (and co.!)
Same here XD I'd only just closed the Sims as well which made it all the more relevant
I am currently reading a book about Leonardo Davinci and practically everyone in his paintings look androgynous to my uneducated eye. I have been surprised more than once to find out that someone who looked very feminine to me was actually very clearly a man actually. Although in one case in his Last Supper painting apparently there was some debate whether one of the people was actually Mary or John (turns out it was John), so even the people who study this stuff aren't always sure.
Interesting bit about He-Man and She-Ra. As an AMAB child (who now identifies as nonbinary as a middle-aged adult), I watched both shows and played with both toy lines. My parents even bought me both the Castle Greyskull and Crystal Castle playsets. I also watched and played with “My Little Pony” toys. I’m glad my parents were progressive in that way, although it still took me decades to realize I wasn’t cisgender.
My art history bachelor was all for that game at the beginning of the video, full mark !
Meanwhile in Scotland . . .
"Son, this is the day you become a man."
* Presents his boy with a kilt *
💜Jessica's dress & bonnet look so lovely!
That's what I love about Lolita fashion, it was started in Japan by feminists reclaiming femininity ❤ Today people of all genders are welcomed by the community, whether they dress in the feminine or masculine (ouji or dandy) versions
I'm one of a pair of fraternal twins, born in the early70's. My parents bought unisex clothes because it was easier with a pair of "hyperactive" twins to just grab a shirt or pair of pants into which they'd stuff the first wiggly child they were able to catch, regardless of whether it was me or my brother. They avoided dressing us "twinny" except for family photos, but my chronically ill mom did not often waste her rare spoons on gendered clothes - again, except for special occasions.
When my littlest saw Encanto, he fell in love with Mirabel's style and we got him a skirt that he wore multiple times to school, etc. Ya know what? It was fun.
I showed him this comment, and his response was: Oh, yeah! I should wash that and wear it again!
We are very fortunate to be living in an area where the schools are very intolerant of bullying. They are taught acceptance and compassion from early on, and it definitely shows. My high schooler, who is queer, has had (in his words) almost no negative repercussions from his peers from coming out. It's even more impressive when you consider that there are an almost equal number of Harris and Drumpf signs in our community, disturbingly enough.
I grew up in the '60s. When GI Joe came out in around "65, us kids were somewhat shocked to see a doll for boys. It was meant to be played with the same as one would with a Barbie. Years later, I thought it was really weird hearing my friend's kid ask if she'd seen his "He Man Doll".
My sister who is not a doll person used to dismissively refer to my younger brothers action man collection as his dollies, & that was half a century ago so I find all the pearl clutching by people with fragile identities both perplexing and amusing
I loved when my Brothers GI Joe dolls got passed down to me. He had the best accessories! And my Barbies needed brothers. (It never occurred to me to make couples with my Barbies and GI Joes.)
Tragically, all infants in my family look like Winston Churchill at birth and only begin to look like babies at about 3-4mo.
Unfortunately the relatives we have that think clothing should be gendered don't really care about the history, so this was just fun for me to watch.
Fortunately they do care about us in general, so they don't say these things directly to our kid, so that's good
The major difference now a days is some adults have the stereotype sherly temple image in their head about girls in tutu dresses showing their diapers instead of "its just a baby, it's loud, it's messy. Put it in a long shirt they can keep using till they are 2 or 3." No, instead they have puffy annoying dresses made of the worst itchy rash induced fabrics for girls & boys get comfy soft cotton clothes.
I have fraternal twins, they are both girls but I discovered when they were very young that many strangers would try and figure out "which one's the boy", I found it fascinating the cues that these people would latch on. Not just skirt/trousers, pink/blue but also pictures/stripes, blue/neon. In fact I think there is a whole stupid complexity of what colours and patterns are seen as more feminine - e.g. is pink camo culturally more feminine than blue flowers I don't know but I bet if you dressed 3yo fraternal twins in them and walked around a park you'd find out strangers are pretty consistent in which they decide "is the boy".
Would they try and stop a Roman Soldier or a Scots mercenary from wearing what they pleased? 😂 I think not. Oh for the time humanity rises above its ridiculous garbage. Let people be. And they dressed little boy like girls for certain pictures when I was a child too.
Exactly.
Honestly, like just where? What makes you comfortable and if anyone has a problem with it, they can build a barge and get over it. That is exactly how things should they and my people can murder what they want, where whatever makes them countable, and if anyone has a problem with it, then get over it.
Yup. I think I have a picture of my father in a dress. Or rather that picture is still at my mother's place. That would have been somewhere from 1934 - 1940.
I live near Amish country (you know, the most old-fashioned people around) and they dress their kids in tiny versions of women's clothing until they're at least old enough to walk around. It's so ignorant of history to claim that dressing children in a gender-ambiguous manner is a new thing!
I did not score well on the game. I figured it was going to be a "trick question" where all of the children were boys.
Reduced cost of postage, which lead to the widespread sending of Christmas cards, lead into the celebration of birthdays? I would watch a video on that topic as well!
That was news to me that birthdays weren’t always celebrated.
Just found out a TH-camr I used to follow is transphobic. I needed this video after that nonsense. Hope everyone is doing well
May I ask who? I want to unsubscribe if I'm subscribed
I find the ‘mom’ character in the playroom to have a really interesting aesthetic. She’s wearing a t-shirt (modern) with a vintage-looking skirt, which together nevertheless create a cohesive look.
I was born in the 1970'ś and of course had a lot of clothes of my older siblings. For me the "we used to be able to distinguish boys from girls" feels so ridiculous. I have pity for the kids these days - it seems difficult to find pretty colours in the midst of the excessive gender coding.
Clothes are just fabric, no need for people to judge 😊
I remember stories of my own father being, "made to wear a dress as a child," as though it were some kind of tradgic backstory. (The only genuinly tradgic part is that I never got a change to ask him personally about it or anything else because I was an infant myself when he passed away.)
In reality, my paternal grandparents simply had a fixation on the aristocracy and wanted to appear upper class, so they observed the (now truly archaic) British tradition of clothing young children in dresses regardless of gender.
Boys not playing w “dolls” but action figures! The same thing really
Yep!
I have a picture of my dad when he was a small child wearing a dress. It was just a thing. And as a young girl, I was never allowed to wear slacks because people would tell my mom what a well mannered son she had. geesh
That's what I main people should just be able to like what they like. anyone who has a problem with that they can get over it
A really good video! As someone who works in childcare, I have conversations about clothes and gender fairly often. Nice to have some more historical references for reflective thought.
They need to check out the Korean groups Ateez and Stray Kids.. never met a crop top they wouldn't wear.. Seonghwa from Ateez wears dresses in the regular and they all wear dresses... Tbh if people have an issue with it I always assume that they are not secure in their own skin!
1:15 1: Girl 2: Boy 3: Boy 4: Boys? Oh dear this definietly seems like I'm guessing boy too often... am I overcompensating? 5: One boy. Result: I thought Jessica was saying number 4 were both the same gender, but I would have guessed right if hadn't misunderstood that, so I'm giving myself two points. Also I didn't realise we were meant to be guessing for the standing child in the first picture, so I had no guess for that. Three points so far. And that's three points in total. Or five if it's a point per child in the last picture.
loved it..although maybe you should look up abby cox and the real history of the corset? You can breath in corsets just fine. There are tons of clothes historians on youtube that has done a lot of great work on this.
I remember the X book. I think that there was also a segment in the movie, "Free to Be"(?) I need to look this up later, but Marlo Thomas was the producer.
In my early 80ies' childhood in the GDR, all children in first kindergarten year (3-4 years old) wore pinafores. In second and third year, they were required to wear either a skirt or trousers under the pinafore, but if you didn't wear long trousers, all children alike looked like the wore cute little dresses. We didn't look like small adults in small adult's clothing - we were children in children's clothing which was way less gendered than it is today. Bright colours and little flowers, cars, balls, animals or abstract patterns.
This changed not until the nineties and nowadays children's pinafores are nowhere to be found, which is a shame in my opinion. Pinafores are so practical and cute.
But, what I wanted to say - this "little boys wear "girl's clothing"" isn't a thing of as far back as you maybe think. We didn't regard it as "girl's clothing" - it was "children's clothing".
I was raised with the X story. It formed my opinions in gender for the rest of my life. I think it succeeded in my home.
* laughs in elder sibling *
My brother got most of my hand-me-downs, which, lucky for him I guess, was probably helped by the fact that I had been basically raised shopping in the boy's/men's clothing department. I had a bunch of granny dresses and whatnot from the thrift store (and a legit Gunnysax in like 1993), but jeans and jackets - usually from the men's dept 🤷
Some folks are just ridiculous - if the person is in clothing fit for purpose/environment, who cares 🤦
I've never understood the problem. Men can wear kilts and I find it a nice look. A friend of my son's is responsible for the school handbook saying boys can't wear dresses because he wore dresses and looked smashing! He had style. If young boys, especially, want to wear dresses, let them. If my daughters wanted to wear jeans or overalls, I let them. It's just a specific group of people telling everyone else how they want us to dress, because they've always gotten away with it. Now that their apple carts are being upended, they're getting testy.
I just got a book for the kids at the library where I work called UPSTAGED. It is a graphic novel and the main character is non binary. It is interesting to see how they dress and what choices they make to express their gender. I love it and the kids do to. I always want to show the kids, mirrors, windows, and doors to the world.
Who knew boys AND girls enjoy freedom of movement, comfort and colours?!
beatiful paint
I've never understood why a person feels the need to police what another wears. As soon as your child is able to talk and walk, they should be allowed to make their own decisions on what to wear, be that a skirt or shorts, feminine or masculine.
Please make a collab with Karolina Zebrowska one day ^^
Can't say much about clothes, but you know how they say that girls tend to go for dolls and such even as babies while boys prefer cars etc.? Well, my niece, 1y1m old, has a slew of toys inherited from all the male and female children who came before her in our family, and she plays with it all indiscriminately. The most, of course, with stuff that wasn't intended to be a toy. Naturally ;)
The correct answer is WHO CARES, WHY DO YOU CARE??!! Oh, the painter, though, they were BRILLIANT with depicting fabrics.
The playroom looks amazing.
7:27 AAAHHH I SPIT OUT MY PEDIALYTE 😂😂😂😂
Thank you for the historical painting section i have so many people to show this to
My toddler is getting to the point where he consistently has an answer for the "are you a boy or girl" question. Its always some version of "neither". We've never pushed, swayed, or coerced his choices. He knows what he likes and what he doesn't (pants are the devil, but dresses with leggings are okay). I've always allowed choice and variety in the things he does, plays with, and wears. All that's resulted in from my point of view is a child who is better at being able to voice his own opinions. As a non-binary adult myself, this is all I could've wished for as a child (that and parents to not force me to wear dresses). I never knew why I felt wrong in my clothes and in general as a "girl" because I was never allowed to choose anything regarding my outward presentstion until I had a job. I don't have an earthly clue what my child's gender may be, but I genuinely don't care because I have a child who is expressive, creative, and has a strong sense of what he likes. The rest of it is labels that he can figure out later if he so chooses
It's understandable that you can't stay upright for longer than a small amount of time I have Arthritis as well.
Okay, the 1:28 guess was tricky for me because it looks very similar to the childhood portrait of king Władysław IV Vasa of Poland by Marcin Kober. Only further proves the point of the video though
Yep, used to buy men's jeans in mid 70s. I am a very tall woman and wore a 36" inseam. Only down side to men's jeans was the fit at the waist. Women's bodies are different from men. In kids, not much difference there.
Well one of these commenters was correct, that child is not in fact either Wilbur or Orville Wright, very astute of them to notice
Have you ever done a video about the one-sex theory as opposed to two-sex theory (i.e. humoral theory that humans are all one sex and internal heat partially masculinizes fetuses into boys and then a second phase of heat turns boys into men at puberty, versus males and females are totally different, almost different species from conception)? I feel like the fall of one-sex theory vs two-sex theory is intertwined with the practice of breeching, and as the two-sex theory became more prominent, the age of breeching went down, we got the skeleton suit, etc. And the rise of two-sex theory is also intertwined with interesting gender ideology in the 18th century, etc., it could make an interesting video!
And I personally find it interesting how, while nowadays we know about the presence of chromosomes from birth, we also know that all humans are sensitive to all sex hormones and we’ve observed the fluidity of biology in response to infusion of hormones, in the womb, at puberty, and at other times in the case of trans people etc. idk, just rambling, but maybe there would be something interesting there.
As far as adults are concerned, we have only to look at other cultures in today's world. No one would question why men in Saudi Arabia wear kaftans. They are essentially very long, white dresses, by Western standards. And certainly no one would question why men in Scotland wear kilts. They are essentially a skirt, by Western standards.
In the 1970's, the Women's Lib Movement told men, "Get in touch with the feminine side of yourself." So, why is society so disturbed by the fact that men did exactly that? To understand women better, men have not only gotten "in touch with their feminine side", but, by transitioning, have gained a better female perspective. People should stop criticizing fashion choices and mind their own damn business!
My father was born in the mid 1940s in Ankara, Turkey. He was a surprise youngest child. We only have two pictures of him before the age of 5, and in both he has long hair and is wearing a white dress.
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That photograph of the young boy with the long blonde hair and in all white was actually of Teddy Roosevelt, as in Roughriders, National Park-establishing, Teddy bear-namesake Teddy Roosevelt.
Not the belly rubs and words of affirmation 😭😭😭
I got 4 points, so not bad overall
I just turned 35... I have very little object permanency and direly need a nap
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you're right,i agree
I guessed all boys because thats what i thought you wouldve done
Sadly i dont have time rn to watch the Video, but i had two lovely Femboy BF'S and they both looked so cute, hot and adorable in dresses and skirts, even better than me (a girl).
All people regarding of gender or sex have the right to look pretty.
I would like to point out one tiny extra shade of meaning please? The adult babies were usually Jesus specifically. This was because of a doctrine at the time that was about Jesus being an adult consciousness in a baby body, so that’s why they drew him that way. Could the lovely Catholic people help me out here? Do you know the doctrine? 🙏🏻 I’m not sure how that effects your point, but I hope the data is useful.
So was the 17th century view that adult women were wearing children’s clothing because they were wearing non-bifurcated garments?
There are not enough fries here... for the salt that is being thrown here :3
Um, super no! There are so many photos of my grandfather in a dress. Please.
I dont know much qbout children, but arent dresses also more practical? At lwast when it comes to changing diapers lol
You just called them "breeches." Since many words these days are based on pronunciation evolution of older words, is it possible that this is where the word "britches" comes from?
Sounds feasible.
Hi! This comment is a bit off-topic, but I was a bit surprised to see other kids' faces unblurred in your video.. I understand that their parents decided it was okay to post their kids' videos online and obviously they're the primary problem (because in my opinion, yes it is an issue that a child who can't possibly consent to this be exposed on the internet for the rest of time), but doesn't reposting these images make you share a small part of responsibility ? Considering the reasons you blur Rupert's face are the same for the other kids as well.
No hate, just a concern I felt was important to share, I hope you have a good day!
Interesting, I hadn’t thought about this. I think there certainly is a difference between showing Rupert and showing stock images of kids (I assume that’s what you’re referencing), since Rupert is not anonymous in the same way that these kids are. And no one is watching a video specifically to see stock images of kids in the same way people watch family vloggers for their children. But that doesn’t mean these stock image kids aren’t being exploited in some way. Not sure where I land on this one.
Jessica kamu suka sering melakukan olahraga lari ga kalo aku boleh tau love from Indonesia 🇮🇩
And then there's the Scottish kilt. A skirt specifically intended to be worn by men. I recall once seeing a Scottish "strong man" contest on TV, featuring men in kilts competing at such feats as balancing what looked like a phone pole upright on their hands and tossing it up to count the end-over-end flips. Hyper-masculine to the limit.
How could a demiboy like me possibly have not enjoyed that?
I guess everyone was a boy
Jessica, I agree with raising children to realize that whether clothing and fabrics is masculine or feminine is a social construct. Also, boys wore dresses for far more years than they haven’t. Curious, though, Jessica is that you clearly go out of your way to wear typically feminine clothes and fabrics and colors. You look fabulous doing so, but do you ever make a point for your son to see you in more masculine clothing, colors, pants so he can see you living your points about clothing?
She's wearing a T-shirt and trousers in the video as well - and she has spoken before about how chronic fatigue can make it difficult for her to dress up some days, so I would assume so.
Is the point not that you can wear what you like? Which is dresses for her. Claudia, his other mother, also dresses as she likes which is usually trousers .
I agree with the above response. I think what that first commenter is suggesting is to model/encourage dressing in an on average culturally gender neutral way. Unfortunately, it seems to me that that would require parents to pretend they don't have stylistic preferences, which arguably defeats the original purpose.
Adopting a "wear what it is you prefer, regardless of cultural gender expectations, just like I do", and modelling being respectful of others' preferences, including the child's, seems like a better aligned approach.
No, the point is you can wear what you want to wear, not what society says you should wear.
Sometimes, people are a mistake.
God told me that all people were a mistake.
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In the US, boys didn’t wear dresses. I think you should clarify the countries where this was applicable.
Have you ever been to a christening? Boys in the U.S. wear/wore dresses.
Yeah no, we still use them in ceremonial situations all the time. The church, the courts, you just didn't register them as dresses because those things are completely normalized even today (because you know... we came from the UK initially, so it makes sense the fashion followed). But even as recently as the 40s there are plenty of photographs of babies and toddlers in gowns, no matter the gender.