My Best Friend Left Me For My Ex // EP 3 - Pretty Lonesome
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ต.ค. 2023
- (Video podcast available on Spotify & TH-cam) This week on Pretty Lonesome, Madeline talks about her ex best friend. She believes ex besties can be harder to get over than ex relationships, and discusses how hard it can be to forgive someone who you truly trusted. In her discussion of forgiveness, Madeline admits that forgiveness isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. She feels that forgiveness should only serve the person who is giving it, not the person who is receiving it. While she has been in both positions, she admits that she would never encourage anyone to rush themselves into forgiving another person. After all, Madeline believes that forgiving too quickly can cause more hurt in the long run. Finally, Madeline shares her belief in manifestation and offers advice for those looking to find their own voice. She reveals that she often used to go on “hot girl walks”, saying manifestations out loud to herself while visualizing cutting physical ties with another person. Madeline is convinced that this method worked wonders with her ex and ex bestie. Join Madeline on Pretty Lonesome for a conversation on relationships, toxicity, forgiveness, manifestation, and finding your voice. Follow and connect with all things @PrettyLonesome across Instagram, TikTok, and TH-cam.
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There is actually a saying: Arguing with smart people is hard. Arguing with stupid people is impossible.
they bring you down to their level and beat you with experience
and then people side with them when they're clearly braindead
That is the truest thing I’ve ever heard. They always come with a excuse or they somehow turn it on you.
The dilemma is what is considered "smart" and what is considered "stupid" is up for interpretation because once upon a time it was smart to sacrifice your first born but now it's considered stupid also it's considered smart to burn fossil fuels now we are becoming to understand that it's stupid because it destroys our environment, as well as it was once considered smart to get married now it's stupid because it leads you to think you have the right to own someone else because you have shared yourself with someone physically and mentally which you don't. What conundrums humans put themselves through but that is the process of evolution essentially.
Well said.
“Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.” - Mark Twain
forgive those people from a distance, they dont change and you dont need it in your life
This was my favourite pod yet. Such lovely sentiments on friendship, falling outs, and not needing to award someone the forgiveness they want to relieve themselves. So so so good
Being gaslit is the worst thing because for the longest time you feel like you are in the wrong and so confused. Yet you still have your truth deep down that exists but nobody seems to even acknowledge it. I had the situation from my closest friend and it was painful.
You let yourself get gaslit. You have to realize when they do it. If it happens once you should be able to catch it in the future.
Yessss like it’s insane
wait till you date someone that works for the cia
Seems like your best friend is quick to latch onto someone else without thinking too much about it. Clingy people can go off the rails. I've seen people who go through such lengths to get another person's attention even if clearly it got them to their how breaking points later on.
this podcast is so good i could listen madeline talking for hours
SAMEEE
arguing with stupid ppl feels like talking to a wall bc no matter how hard you try they just won't get the point
Hearing you vent literally makes me feel better abt my situation. Pls don’t ever stop.
my crazy girl trait is if i'm really feeling something and journaling isnt cutting it, i'll go on a walk kind of pretending to be on the phone but actually just recording voice notes about the situation and how it makes me feel like i'm having a conversation with myself. nice and cathartic
stop i do that too
I've done that so much I ended up with a phone full of my life narrated in my own voce, literal hours worth. if anyone ever found that there was my life on a literal gold plat. ended up going through everything and deleting it all. now I just talk without recording lol
that actually sounds nice! i'll try it out next time lol
I do that tooo i thought i was the only one
i love when madeline and nailea post on the same day
Same!!
REAL
said nailea posted !??
If people cross your boundaries and they don’t apologize. Forgive and move on. No need for unnecessary drama, just quietly move on.
something about this video completely healed me. i went through something similar about 2-3 years ago and i was devastated. it was one of if not the hardest friendship breakup ive ever experienced. and its interesting because when you talk in this video, you describe every exact thought and feeling i was going through and shifting through my mind after being traumatized by something like that. you just put it all into words and i appreciated it sm.
Came to the comments bc that’s exactly how I feel it healed me just 11 min in rn, her voice really soothes me as well for some odd reason
Love how you speak on gaslighting trauma. Touched my soul truly. Thank you for posting this
you’re one of the people who’s the most deserving of having a platform. i found your channel at the time in my life that i needed it most. i so appreciate how spiritual, wise, and articulate you are. with your conscious views, you basically beat the matrix.
I've had similar experiences to that and more than once too. I've started therapy this year and it feels like I have finally been able to cut those energy ties from the people who hurt me. In a way I feel reborn again. And I don't know why but I just wanted to share this. Therapy is really just that transformative if you keep up with it. My mind is blown by that hahaha
i can’t even explain how much i relate to you and your podcasts and the stories within it really feels like i’m listening to myself it’s crazy. especially the part about falling into the wrong universe.
stop commenting on your own video maddy
ahhhhh😳
No idea who you are, but the things you spoke about are far from crazy. You had your own ‘universe’ or reality crushed and left you with desillusions because they wanted their own ego to be preserved. And didn’t mind your heart and feelings. The fact you pulled out with all the fears and unraveling what was true or not must’ve been extremely exhaustion. Pure respect for you and hope you are well. Nicely done woman, that’s some special mental strengths you got. Don’t let anyone take that away. Makes you special and makes you you. 👋🏾
I've had similar traumatic experiences, and I couldn't agree more narcissistic people are completely in-tune to their victims!
I really respect and thank Madeline for being so open about her life cos it really does help us. This is my favourite podcast 💕💕
This is my therapy, I’m so grateful for your videos.
madeline, your commentary on this and the whole pretty lonesome project has already helped me realize stuff about myself so much since discovering it yesterday. i'm oddly looking forward to next monday!
never stop podcasting. i love these and you so much
actually thank you so much for this i've been having similar experiences over the past year and it's comforting to know i'm not alone and that over time it gets better! ❤️
Thank you so much Madeline for sharing this!! I was in a similar situation about a year ago. I’m still struggling to make sense of it and to cope with the unfairness and betrayal of it all. I was also made to feel stupid for not being able to „just get over it“ so this is so validating and gives me hope. I really hope you’re doing well and could find peace in yourself again, loads of love
sometimes i feel like we are the same person because we have such similar personalities and have gone through such similar things 😭😭😭 i enjoy these podcasts SO MUCH you are the absolute best madeline!!!!! my fav podcaster/ youtuber forever
This is a really important topic, i've had close friends wrong me many times. It's a really sad, angry, confusing situation that almost everyone experiences. You talked about it in a mature and relatable way and it really stuck a cord with me. People are strange
People are such losers saying she takes too long to get to the story.. she is not here to give you tea. This is a podcast on feelings, selfworth and identity etc. NOT a gossip podcast. Wake up to yourself. “Taking forever to get to the story” SHES NOT HERE TO TELL YOU THE DETAILS ON WHAT HAPPENED WITH WHO.
wait who has said that?
@@user-np8yf8fj2w so many people. Read the damn comments. Saying she beats around the bush and didnt explain the situation.
4:53 Talk about people not apologizing. This girl I dated had cheated on me and has never apologized. We spoke recently after years. I asked why she cheated and the closest to an apology in that conversation that I got was “you know we’ve both done things that we regret”. I almost spit my water out. If this was a cartoon milk would have shot out of my nose
I've been going through something similar over the past few months, and I have felt lost within myself and honestly your advice was so helpful, thank you for sharing your life on such a deep level it defo can be daunting.
Just saw you had new videos out. It's so good to have you back! Thank you for sharing and expressing yourself the way you do, it's so refreshing and has inspired me a lot in trusting and owning my own authenticity.
this podcast episode was therapy. thank you.
Mentioning how cheating in this case would be the "less severe" offence and the context should give people enough to realize how bad the situation must have been without knowing the details
This is so true
i am actually genuinely baffled that you’re describing the situation i’m in atm WORD FOR WORD. same scenario, same thoughts
This near exact thing happened to me with this girl at college. Victimizing me in their head and everyon elses head cause they felt bad for what they done. Thank you for sharing. It's always a good time clicking on one of your videos. I was gaslit too.
i know exactly how you feel, someone you trusted so much betraying you comes as such a shock you really don’t know which way is up, i still think about it like how tf did i go through that
I already know this is going to be good😭
I totally understand your emotions and thank you for being vulnerable 😢I went through similar situations and we always will grow from it
Wake up everyone, it's Madeline Monday 🦋🦋🦋
Every episode I feel so seen omg. This girl did something really backstabbing to me in high school after we were such close friends in elementary school and she couldn’t understand why I was so upset with her because she had no obligation to me. Betraying someone you loved in childhood just feels so evil to me!!
the timing of this video is stunning
So babes Every time you go back to a memory you are reliving it your body is reliving it and I think you have a higher chance of re-creating that situation I know in my life when I have really bad situations It’s like my ultimate fear and then they end up manifesting
I've never been so excited for Monday, you are brilliant madz💗🌟🥰
"I cant process the emotions of a stupid person" oooooooh I felt you on that one!
Driving home from work great this dropped really loved the last one
No cus friends who’ve known you for 10+ years choosing a person they recently met bc of the benefits goes hard. I had friends for 12 ish yrs and a person who I jus became friends with I ended things with after 6 months cus as much as she was the kindest girl she didn’t provide what I needed in a friend who saw the potential I had and pushed me to become the best person as a friend does. So I left and everybody else left with her
your content is so comforting.
i know i never had an original experience because you exist. thank u 4 posting this!
you're actually the best person - your videos make me think maybe i should just try out therapy and i mean that in the most complimentary way ever
I’m going through the same situation. Crazy that youtube suggested this video. I relate so much especially in this stage of my life. Felt like my whole world is crashing
You really make my Mondays ❤
everything your saying is so spot on for when i was in a similar situation with an ex close friend that i knew since childhood. it's really healing to hear people with similar experiences or have friends that can tell you that you're being treated wrong.
This is mt comfort vid
When you said “you have to feel to heal”… I always think to myself that it’s not worth the thoughts, it’s just silly, I care to much… so it just feels wrong to sit there and think about a situation where the other person probably don’t even care about.
This is so true. I feel like you are describing my experiences like it literally broke my heart when my best friend screamed at me for mistreating someone who I didn’t do anything to. This girl literally bullied and gaslit me all throughout school and I couldn’t believe that my best friend believed her over me.
On the brink of 400K subs..
Well-deserved, fr.
When you were talking about cutting energy ties, esp with naracisstic people, it kinda makes sense bc of the law of detachment. The minute you stop caring is when what you were so deeply yearning for before, actually happens - crazy how it all works
this was so relatable
You should always forgive, but you don't have to forget.
I wouldnt want to be the child me. I was naive and blind to the realities of the world. Sure, I was more empathetic, but I also was more vulnerable.
i'm so sorry for what you went through, hearing you talk about it has really struck me. i feel so much less alone. i went through a very very similar situation with a good amount of my friends and best friends and an awful ex of mine over the course of years, it feels so nice to hear exactly how i feel so perfectly articulated. it drove me CRAZY, and i literally went into a total reclusive state for like 3 years and i'm just now coming out of it. thank you for being so vulnerable!!! i feel so deeply for what you went through, i hope that you have amazing people in your life now that clearly love and respect you.
I enjoy listening to these so much ❤
It’s always a cozy time with you 🥰 & reassuring cuz you talk about feelings that aren’t discussed enough. I personally don’t forgive unchanged behavior. I don’t carry it with me or keep it in my mind but I will write out everything that happened in an email to myself & leave it. I don’t put pressure on myself to forgive because if a person is capable of doing the same thing again, I don’t want to be an enabler by being fine with it/them.
Going to go on a mid girl walk now. I love your talk on energy & cutting that connection🫶🏼
i love a good rant on the good internet
i saw this notification and immediately clicked the video
i am loving this tea love you mads
holy mackerel, you are entertaining to listen to, but to be friend with is probably tons of hard work, kudos to the people that manage to be your friends
the queen is back yaaaay, i haven't seen you in three months. your videos have given me a different and interesting perspective.
just woke up from some mad sleep paralysis, needed some healing, come to your podcast. thank u for bringing me back to reality madz, feel like i'm on facetime to u ahahaha bc why is this so relatable
Girly pop, I had a really similar situation this year💕 thank u for sharing 🫶🏻
you are literally my safe place , thank you
if a friend quickly believes someone elses word on your character specially something negative they were just waiting for a reason to hate you because they rather be in denial about themselves than to allow any sort of anger/hate be expressed on a healthy level....like they get themselves into friendships/relationships forcing themselves to coexist with people they themselves don't get along with because the thought of ''not everyone will be everyone's cup of tea'' is terrifying to them, they want to believe this delusion that they are so easy going , that they can be everyones friend that when shit hits the fan their bottled up resentment and regret comes out.
We have lived the exact same life.
i love you , you get me exactly i’ve felt like this for the longest
@Madelinargy - The jokes on your Best friend and Ex... You're First Class Epicness at it's finest! Smart, good Looking, genuine, articulate and able to converse at a high standard.
What is not to like!? Madeline you're killing it... Just stay being you! ✨
Madeline: "let me take you on a journey..."
Me yells at my ipad: TAKE ME BABYY AND DONT BRING ME BACKK 💞💞💞💞💞💞
i needed this, thank you ❤
Got a question, how do I make genuine friendships with people in this friendless pandemic we're in? Also I love you! You make me feel less lonely
Girl I have the same question. I genuinely put my heart into my friendships and I think that’s where I mess up. I put so much that I get disappointed when I don’t get the same energy back. and it’s hard to find friends that don’t BACK STAB you every time 🙃
i think the important thing is to not put your eggs in one basket. Allow and cultivate multiple friendships. Put effort in, but don’t exert yourself on them, give what’s you’re given and a little more. Never give someone more than they’re giving you to the point where it’s detrimental to you. Let things progress naturally with a little bit of help, because if they will be they’ll be. Trust in the fact that you’ll find people who are worth your while, and who find you worth theirs.
Just reached the end & omg yes yes yes!! About cutting the cords. I cut the cords & narcissists/energy vampires do feel it!!! 😂🔝
My old best friend knew my ex was crazy and got engaged to him the night she met him…
Can’t fix stupid. 🤷🏼♀️
At least you still got your car and that's what matters.
damn girl, why has everything happened to you....
So glad to hear that I'm not the only one who's gone throught thinking they were crazy when all that was happening was someone projecting their sick and childish reality into them.
Now that I'm over the situation I see it. It was really simple actually, that was not a real pearson, she's just a character, a child trying to live with adults.
those „friends“ were defo jealous I mean look at yourself 😂
Forgiveness for me only is granted with change of behaviour. I don't care about an "I'm sorry" if the same sht is pulled again shortly after.
This is so sad. We need to be careful how we treat each other, I hope your bestfriend can learn from this.
As a guy, this is so hard to listen to.
i have NEVER heard someone tell such an insane story just like mine!
I love! You too.
Thank you so much for sharing your English videos. Have a good afternon ☺👍
this has to be a universal experience
The worst and what still seems like the most confusing lesson ive ever learned is that sometimes people will leave just because.
They will do what seems easiest to them and sometimes thats leaving you, even if you were the perfect friend
God i hate that one because ive been in both ends. I guess its just life
imagine doing a whole podcast and going on and on for almost an HOUR about how you feel about a situation and then NOT TELLING US THE SITUATION
brb gonna rip my hair out
well she said from the beginning she wasnt going to give any details on the actual situation
yeah like spill the tea
I really feel you, see the blessing you removed snakes and stupid people from your life
"...the more I grow and the more I go to therapy, the more my goal is to become who I was when I was six years old again, because that was the purest, most loving, most kind, most genuine version of myself; her hobbies, her interests, her reactions to things, I'm trying to get back to them..." You sometimes say things that really have an impact on me, but it happens so randomly during your talks, you don't even realize how beautiful are some of the things you say, as if Apollo likes to show up in your speeches, and kiss you, and then go again. I've never thought about it before, I'm so far from the child I was, at least that little dude had some things clear in his mind back then
i feel the exact same way about her too and the way that you describe how you see her was beautiful and also i hope that someday you can be little you again! 💗💗
I talk to myself too, like i am on a podcast when i am by myself. Free therapy ✨
what came to my mind was this, how can they be your best friend if they do something like that to you? it's insane to me
Great job
i have Never heard someone tell such an insane story just like mine!
Love you Madeline💖