I am disabled and hate being called inspirational!... or when they say...”I don’t know how you do it...” do what?! Stay alive?! Is not like I am juggling oranges while cooking egg fried rice! And if you as a Christian hate people saying they’ll prey for you, imagine when you are trying to live your life by atheists believes (my believes are as strong as anybody’s). Sarah, you ARE Inspirational. I wish I had the courage and talent to have my own TH-cam channel. X
The collage one. I can relate to I had a studio to my self when I was at university. This was due to multiple disabilities this was the only room that met that. My university gave me no fanatical support to help me pay for this. I was lonely a lot of the time.I would habe liked to live with others but that was not a option for me. I also hate people thinking that i what/should be healed or cured. My disabilities have taught me so much and made me think about others and the world in a deep and conidrate way. I care about the planet and thouse that live on it (human, animals, fish and plants). Also I live a happy life for the most part most of the things that up set me is others attitudes toward disabilities and acessablelity. Like when places say that the acessable but not when I get there.
This was REALLY helpful - especially to challenge my own ableist beliefs (example - my gut reaction to say “how inspirational”). At the end of the day, we live in an ableist world so I know I need to start challenging those instinctual thought patterns! Thanks again 🙏
I love how you can inspire people. I hate it when I mentchen my depresstoin and people ask me if I'm ok the real answer is no I'm not but I can't say that without pitty.
My aunt was a quadriplegic from MS (I also have MS) when they went out to restaurants and the servers would ask her husband "what is she having?" His response was "I don't know ask her" I know that I would not be the person I am if I did not have my aunt in my life. I remember my nephew who was 9 at the time said to me "what where you like before?" got me thinking he has only know me like this. Like you I choose to be happy
Great work on this video! It was very informative and will help many people learn how to support people with disabilities rather than pity them or make them feel uncomfortable.
This video was actually very interesting! You’re really well-spoken and I love that you spread awareness about this topic, because especially younger kids might accidentally say something that they think sounds nice without realising that it’s not exactly appropriate. also, I didn’t even know that you have a tiktok account! On my way to follow you now ☺️
I have cerebral palsy not that it matters but I find that some people don't know how to approach people with disabilities some people think we're stupid and that they can take advantage of the disability I had to cut some people out of my life because of this having a disability you have to choose the people you surround yourself with wisely
Yes this is so important! Thank you for explaining this so calmly, more people need to see this video💛 I can understand why young kids may ask some of these. But as young adults, we should really be able to use our judgment and refrain from saying and doing these things.
You are such an amazing person and perfect advocate for the disabled . I work with disabled people every day. I learned a lot from this video. Keep your head up and keep up the amazing work on your videos
I really appreciate your great advice. I have chronic illnesses and I hate it when people comment on my body when it’s nothing I can control its at the mercy of my body’s flare ups
One I hate as well is ‘awww bless her’. Sometimes people will see me in my wheelchair and I will hear them say ‘awww bless her’. Or if they stop ask me a question and they will say ‘ aww bless you’. Really grates on me that one
I am so thankful you are raising awareness that people who live with disabilities are fully human, that we do things that fully-abled people do, we just do them differently. You are a beautiful, intelligent, wise young lady.
I was in the hospital yesterday morning for an emergency gallbladder removal (I’m 65, on a walker due to spondylolisthesis, L4/L5, ruptured disc between, my L3 is “out of place,” and the disc between L5 & S1 is compressed, thus, I have very limited mobility from my hips down), and yet, with letting the OR/ER doctors & nurses know this, I was still asked to “scooch down a little more,” or “okay, you can swing your legs up onto the bed now,” or “let’s just go to the restroom really quickly and void our bladder.” I can’t “scooch,” “swing” or do anything quickly, especially with needles and tubes coming out of my hands/arms.
I never would have thought about the inspirational idea in that way! If I said that to someone in the past, I didn't mean for it to be rude, but I can def see how it can come across that way!
My four year old daughter has AFM and her left arm and hand is affected and so many nurses and other medical professionals ask her what she did to her arm! One time we responded, "She didn't do anything to it, it is paralysed" and the nurse had the cheek to say we should lie to stop people feeling bad for asking!
The nurse told her to lie? How awful. She has no business being a nurse, IMO. One thing I learned from being hospitalized is that all nurses aren't angels on earth and some of them are just downright bad. When I was in the hospital, I had a seemingly very nice nurse come in and ask how I was doing, if I needed anything, etc. I was thinking how kind she was when I heard her right outside my hospital room door saying to another nurse, "would you like a foot massage? Can I fluff your pillows, princess?" She was being sarcastic and so rude! I was really hurt by that.
I get similar comments on my arms too! I have hypotonia in my arms due to my EDS and I always hated that i was told i needed to work out more to catch up with the other dancers even though it wouldnt make a difference (believe me, i tried) now that im older Ive come to terms with it but it really messed me up as a kid
That’s so rude that people would say they only help you open things if you share them. I definitely know what you mean about the whole inspiring thing. I tell people all the time but if they want to say it’s inspiring and I get good grades or I’m a good writer then go right ahead, but if they find me inspiring simply because I’m living a happy and fulfilled life with a visual impairment then that’s not OK because they wouldn’t find someone doing the same kind of lifestyle I am without a disability to be inspiring, so then they shouldn’t find me inspiring for doing normal things.
My mom is disabled. She had a brain bleed at around 23/24 then a stroke in hospital right after that. I wasn't born until She was 27. She had agoraphobia until I was almost 9 and struggles every day but she's not sorry for herself. My younger sister will get mad at her and say "well not everyone gets a check like you" or "some people have to pay rent and work every day". My sister does work really hard and doesn't have kids so it hurts my mom because she's finally after all these a little more comfortable living in housing for elderly and disabled so she gets help with her rent and is on disability because she can't work. My mom used to work a little but she's gotten weaker and also had foot surgeries recently. She can't even drive and i was in a hard spot with my 3 kids so she basically gave me her mini van for now. My mom even went to school online for years, graduated top of her class but sadly realized she can't do all the physical things associated with her degree so it was kinda wasted time.
I slightly disagree on the last point-- I think it is inspirational when anyone, disability or no disability, can stay happy and fulfilled in an utter political, economic, and environmental chaos, along with the spread of a deadly virus. It is something that is incredibly hard to do. I apologize if I'm coming off as I don't know how anyone can be happy in the chaotic year of 2020, but I really don't know. I also apologize if it seems like I'm downplaying disabilities by mentioning the pandemic and chaos of 2020, I understand that even though people are getting COVID, a non-life threatening disability can still be a huge challenge.
I understand you’re not trying to be insensitive, but it is quite ableist to have that belief. 2020 has been a hard year for everyone; not just people with disabilities. I have been lucky enough not to get COVID and because of that my year has been much easier than someone who got COVID’s has. And I have a disability. Everyone has struggles; disability isn’t the only struggle someone can have. I feel like you extended what I was saying too much. I was specifically talking about disability... not anyone in the world or people living through 2020. I am not inspirational for being happy. Thank you for watching though :)
Does it bother you when people ask how you got paralyzed? It's something I'd do, because medical and especially neurological stuff is my autistic special interest. And probably not realize it may be inappropriate to ask.
Hi Sarah, I’m a new subscriber. I also have a disability. I have weak muscles. It really bothers me when people assume having a disability is a sad thing. When in reality we are normal people. I’m also a Christian, and it bugs me when people ask “May I pray for you?”
PS you have to be very careful who you let around you some people will try to destroy you because they think you're dumb or stupid be careful that happened to me it made me not want to be around too many people anymore these are critical times that we are living in so you have to be extra careful especially if you're a disabled person
Hi Sarah, i disagree with your thoughts on the last thing abled people say. When i say to disabled people with youtube channels "you are so inspirational" its not because you cannot be happy having a disability. It is because i believe that it takes great strength to deal with things that are difficult for us or that we cannot change (it can be a disability or a fear or something that is hard for us o something in our personality that we want to change). I think you are inspirational because you teach me every day to battle my insecurities and my problems and be a happy person while doing so. And you do so in the same way an abled-bodied person does. I know you may not see it that way but just stop to think that if people say that to you it is because they are going through something in their lives and they would want to have the strength they see you have. It is just my opinion but maybe it can help you not to be so angry about that last one. I agree on everything else you said. I like your channel 😁. I send you my love from Argentina!
Hi! Thank you for your thoughts! I still do disagree with you though. Being inspirational for dealing with challenges isn’t a good thing, either. That once again feeds into the mentality that having a disability is a challenge that is tougher than anything else and so it isn’t expected that I (or other people with disabilities) would be happy. This causes people to make unnecessary assumptions about my disability. By saying this, you’re assuming my disability brings me challenges harder than no other; while actually, I’m quite thankful for many of the positive things my disability has brought me and these challenges don’t bother me much. So I please ask that you don’t call disabled people inspirational because a majority of the time, it bothers us. Thank you for the nice compliment though :)
Ok. I understand what you are saying. Thank you for telling me this. I know human interactions are always difficult and many times we cannot understand how it feels to be someone else. I dont assume that you should be unhappy however. I think you are you. You have the same range of emotions anyone has and thats what everyone should understand (or your own set of emotions that are yours). Anyway i think just having this type of conversations help. Again, lots of love!
Love your sassynesss. Talk about whatever you want especially people with disabilities. Would you mind talking about your thoughts on babieschildren in your future. I was just curious. If I'm overstepping boundaries. Please tell me.
PS you talking about your disability so that people can learn from you and don't have to ask so many questions it's obvious to me that you want to educate people about not only your disability but other people's disability as well keep up the good work
One thing I noticed you didn’t mention is...”you don’t LOOK like you have a disability” do you ever get this and how do you deal with it? I myself don’t have a disability, only a disorder, however my son does have a disability, he is non verbal severely autistic, and the first comment I get when I tell someone why he doesn’t talk or why he is acting the way he is, is that he doesn’t LOOK autistic and it really erks me, sometimes I feel like saying “well you don’t look stupid” but obviously that isn’t very kind, sometimes I just don’t know how to deal with it and it frustrates me, I’d love any tips or coping mechanisms!
At school my classmates and friends would say I'm lucky because I had large books. I did because I'm visually impaired due to cerebral palsy they didn't know how I can't carry them in my backpack and people look at me
![HARDEST PART OF BEING DISABLED // My biggest struggle regarding my disability [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/EIk-Bl2XFp0/mqdefault.jpg)
![HARDEST PART OF BEING DISABLED // My biggest struggle regarding my disability [CC]](/img/tr.png)
![5 HARDEST Things to do with ONE HAND! // The struggles of having a paralyzed hand [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/ztWmp7A2oBI/mqdefault.jpg)
![5 PARALYSIS MISCONCEPTIONS // Why what many people assume about paralysis is wrong! [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/jF3fFeD8n04/mqdefault.jpg)
![MY SCOLIOSIS SURGERY STORY! // Having a spinal fusion at 14 years old [CC]](/img/n.gif)
Thank you so much for watching! I’d love for you to check out my books! 🤗 www.etsy.com/shop/SarahToddHammer
As a legally blind man I’ll say when somebody says, I’m praying for you. I’m like thanks for the prayer, but why can’t you be my friend?
Exactly
I am disabled and hate being called inspirational!... or when they say...”I don’t know how you do it...” do what?! Stay alive?! Is not like I am juggling oranges while cooking egg fried rice! And if you as a Christian hate people saying they’ll prey for you, imagine when you are trying to live your life by atheists believes (my believes are as strong as anybody’s).
Sarah, you ARE Inspirational. I wish I had the courage and talent to have my own TH-cam channel. X
The collage one. I can relate to I had a studio to my self when I was at university. This was due to multiple disabilities this was the only room that met that. My university gave me no fanatical support to help me pay for this. I was lonely a lot of the time.I would habe liked to live with others but that was not a option for me.
I also hate people thinking that i what/should be healed or cured. My disabilities have taught me so much and made me think about others and the world in a deep and conidrate way. I care about the planet and thouse that live on it (human, animals, fish and plants). Also I live a happy life for the most part most of the things that up set me is others attitudes toward disabilities and acessablelity. Like when places say that the acessable but not when I get there.
This was REALLY helpful - especially to challenge my own ableist beliefs (example - my gut reaction to say “how inspirational”). At the end of the day, we live in an ableist world so I know I need to start challenging those instinctual thought patterns! Thanks again 🙏
Thank you so much for listening to my perspective! That’s wonderful that you’re learning! I appreciate it ❤️
I'll take the inspirational comment over the if I was you I'd probably already be dead comment any day. But neither of them are great.
I love how you can inspire people. I hate it when I mentchen my depresstoin and people ask me if I'm ok the real answer is no I'm not but I can't say that without pitty.
My aunt was a quadriplegic from MS (I also have MS) when they went out to restaurants and the servers would ask her husband "what is she having?" His response was "I don't know ask her" I know that I would not be the person I am if I did not have my aunt in my life. I remember my nephew who was 9 at the time said to me "what where you like before?" got me thinking he has only know me like this. Like you I choose to be happy
I’m glad you’re happy! Thank you for sharing your experience with me! 💞
Great work on this video! It was very informative and will help many people learn how to support people with disabilities rather than pity them or make them feel uncomfortable.
Thank you so much! I’m so glad you found it informative! ❤️
This video was actually very interesting! You’re really well-spoken and I love that you spread awareness about this topic, because especially younger kids might accidentally say something that they think sounds nice without realising that it’s not exactly appropriate. also, I didn’t even know that you have a tiktok account! On my way to follow you now ☺️
Thank you so much! I’m so glad you enjoyed!!!! 💞
Your language and clarity is helpful to those of us without disabilities. Thank you for your honesty and frankness.
I have cerebral palsy not that it matters but I find that some people don't know how to approach people with disabilities some people think we're stupid and that they can take advantage of the disability I had to cut some people out of my life because of this having a disability you have to choose the people you surround yourself with wisely
Yes this is so important! Thank you for explaining this so calmly, more people need to see this video💛 I can understand why young kids may ask some of these. But as young adults, we should really be able to use our judgment and refrain from saying and doing these things.
Thank you so much! I completely agree! ❤️
You are such an amazing person and perfect advocate for the disabled . I work with disabled people every day. I learned a lot from this video. Keep your head up and keep up the amazing work on your videos
Thank you, as always!! :)
I really appreciate your great advice. I have chronic illnesses and I hate it when people comment on my body when it’s nothing I can control its at the mercy of my body’s flare ups
One I hate as well is ‘awww bless her’. Sometimes people will see me in my wheelchair and I will hear them say ‘awww bless her’. Or if they stop ask me a question and they will say ‘ aww bless you’. Really grates on me that one
Omg that is the worst. That would irk me to no end 😭😭😭
Well said, I always feel positive and happy after watching your videos.
I’m glad!!!
I am so thankful you are raising awareness that people who live with disabilities are fully human, that we do things that fully-abled people do, we just do them differently. You are a beautiful, intelligent, wise young lady.
Thank you so very much! ❤️
I was in the hospital yesterday morning for an emergency gallbladder removal (I’m 65, on a walker due to spondylolisthesis, L4/L5, ruptured disc between, my L3 is “out of place,” and the disc between L5 & S1 is compressed, thus, I have very limited mobility from my hips down), and yet, with letting the OR/ER doctors & nurses know this, I was still asked to “scooch down a little more,” or “okay, you can swing your legs up onto the bed now,” or “let’s just go to the restroom really quickly and void our bladder.” I can’t “scooch,” “swing” or do anything quickly, especially with needles and tubes coming out of my hands/arms.
I never would have thought about the inspirational idea in that way! If I said that to someone in the past, I didn't mean for it to be rude, but I can def see how it can come across that way!
My four year old daughter has AFM and her left arm and hand is affected and so many nurses and other medical professionals ask her what she did to her arm!
One time we responded, "She didn't do anything to it, it is paralysed" and the nurse had the cheek to say we should lie to stop people feeling bad for asking!
Omg 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️ People amaze me sometimes lol
The nurse told her to lie? How awful. She has no business being a nurse, IMO. One thing I learned from being hospitalized is that all nurses aren't angels on earth and some of them are just downright bad. When I was in the hospital, I had a seemingly very nice nurse come in and ask how I was doing, if I needed anything, etc. I was thinking how kind she was when I heard her right outside my hospital room door saying to another nurse, "would you like a foot massage? Can I fluff your pillows, princess?" She was being sarcastic and so rude! I was really hurt by that.
I’ve lived with a disability my entire life so I could totally relate on so many points here.
Me too
I get similar comments on my arms too! I have hypotonia in my arms due to my EDS and I always hated that i was told i needed to work out more to catch up with the other dancers even though it wouldnt make a difference (believe me, i tried) now that im older Ive come to terms with it but it really messed me up as a kid
Ugh the comments can just be so annoying and unnecessary 😭 I’m sorry you dealt with it too!
Love your videos!!!!! I have CP autism and a visual impairment so I get everything you are talking about I also love your room
That’s so rude that people would say they only help you open things if you share them. I definitely know what you mean about the whole inspiring thing. I tell people all the time but if they want to say it’s inspiring and I get good grades or I’m a good writer then go right ahead, but if they find me inspiring simply because I’m living a happy and fulfilled life with a visual impairment then that’s not OK because they wouldn’t find someone doing the same kind of lifestyle I am without a disability to be inspiring, so then they shouldn’t find me inspiring for doing normal things.
Right? And yes! Exactly! It's not a compliment! Thank you for commenting :)
Thank you so much for making this video! It’s super informative and important! You’re an amazing advocate Sarah Todd!💗❤️
Awww thank you Clare!! You're always the sweetest :)
I love ❤️ watching you’re videos because it give me a whole new perspective each time. Keep it up Sarah!!
I hate people's pity prayers! Feel that so deeply.
Right? It's so frustrating!
My mom is disabled. She had a brain bleed at around 23/24 then a stroke in hospital right after that. I wasn't born until She was 27. She had agoraphobia until I was almost 9 and struggles every day but she's not sorry for herself. My younger sister will get mad at her and say "well not everyone gets a check like you" or "some people have to pay rent and work every day". My sister does work really hard and doesn't have kids so it hurts my mom because she's finally after all these a little more comfortable living in housing for elderly and disabled so she gets help with her rent and is on disability because she can't work. My mom used to work a little but she's gotten weaker and also had foot surgeries recently. She can't even drive and i was in a hard spot with my 3 kids so she basically gave me her mini van for now. My mom even went to school online for years, graduated top of her class but sadly realized she can't do all the physical things associated with her degree so it was kinda wasted time.
i love your videos!! you're such an inspiration :)
Clearly you didnt watch to the end.
I slightly disagree on the last point-- I think it is inspirational when anyone, disability or no disability, can stay happy and fulfilled in an utter political, economic, and environmental chaos, along with the spread of a deadly virus. It is something that is incredibly hard to do.
I apologize if I'm coming off as I don't know how anyone can be happy in the chaotic year of 2020, but I really don't know.
I also apologize if it seems like I'm downplaying disabilities by mentioning the pandemic and chaos of 2020, I understand that even though people are getting COVID, a non-life threatening disability can still be a huge challenge.
I understand you’re not trying to be insensitive, but it is quite ableist to have that belief. 2020 has been a hard year for everyone; not just people with disabilities. I have been lucky enough not to get COVID and because of that my year has been much easier than someone who got COVID’s has. And I have a disability. Everyone has struggles; disability isn’t the only struggle someone can have. I feel like you extended what I was saying too much. I was specifically talking about disability... not anyone in the world or people living through 2020. I am not inspirational for being happy. Thank you for watching though :)
@@SarahToddHammer i'll try to reshape my viewpoint from here on out
Does it bother you when people ask how you got paralyzed? It's something I'd do, because medical and especially neurological stuff is my autistic special interest. And probably not realize it may be inappropriate to ask.
Hi Sarah, I’m a new subscriber. I also have a disability. I have weak muscles. It really bothers me when people assume having a disability is a sad thing. When in reality we are normal people. I’m also a Christian, and it bugs me when people ask “May I pray for you?”
Wow ppl are so ignorant. Ppl dont want to be singled out. Great job ST
PS you have to be very careful who you let around you some people will try to destroy you because they think you're dumb or stupid be careful that happened to me it made me not want to be around too many people anymore these are critical times that we are living in so you have to be extra careful especially if you're a disabled person
Hi Sarah, i disagree with your thoughts on the last thing abled people say. When i say to disabled people with youtube channels "you are so inspirational" its not because you cannot be happy having a disability. It is because i believe that it takes great strength to deal with things that are difficult for us or that we cannot change (it can be a disability or a fear or something that is hard for us o something in our personality that we want to change). I think you are inspirational because you teach me every day to battle my insecurities and my problems and be a happy person while doing so. And you do so in the same way an abled-bodied person does. I know you may not see it that way but just stop to think that if people say that to you it is because they are going through something in their lives and they would want to have the strength they see you have. It is just my opinion but maybe it can help you not to be so angry about that last one. I agree on everything else you said. I like your channel 😁. I send you my love from Argentina!
Hi! Thank you for your thoughts! I still do disagree with you though. Being inspirational for dealing with challenges isn’t a good thing, either. That once again feeds into the mentality that having a disability is a challenge that is tougher than anything else and so it isn’t expected that I (or other people with disabilities) would be happy. This causes people to make unnecessary assumptions about my disability. By saying this, you’re assuming my disability brings me challenges harder than no other; while actually, I’m quite thankful for many of the positive things my disability has brought me and these challenges don’t bother me much. So I please ask that you don’t call disabled people inspirational because a majority of the time, it bothers us. Thank you for the nice compliment though :)
Ok. I understand what you are saying. Thank you for telling me this. I know human interactions are always difficult and many times we cannot understand how it feels to be someone else. I dont assume that you should be unhappy however. I think you are you. You have the same range of emotions anyone has and thats what everyone should understand (or your own set of emotions that are yours).
Anyway i think just having this type of conversations help. Again, lots of love!
@@florenciavallecardama1126 Thank you very much for understanding! :)
Could you be any more condescending?
Love your sassynesss. Talk about whatever you want especially people with disabilities.
Would you mind talking about your thoughts on babieschildren in your future. I was just curious. If I'm overstepping boundaries. Please tell me.
PS you talking about your disability so that people can learn from you and don't have to ask so many questions it's obvious to me that you want to educate people about not only your disability but other people's disability as well keep up the good work
One thing I noticed you didn’t mention is...”you don’t LOOK like you have a disability” do you ever get this and how do you deal with it? I myself don’t have a disability, only a disorder, however my son does have a disability, he is non verbal severely autistic, and the first comment I get when I tell someone why he doesn’t talk or why he is acting the way he is, is that he doesn’t LOOK autistic and it really erks me, sometimes I feel like saying “well you don’t look stupid” but obviously that isn’t very kind, sometimes I just don’t know how to deal with it and it frustrates me, I’d love any tips or coping mechanisms!
I get the "You don't look disabled comment and respond with "Well, you don't look ignorant, but now we know we were both wrong."
Your very beautiful and positive that's great your a help to many
At school my classmates and friends would say I'm lucky because I had large books. I did because I'm visually impaired due to cerebral palsy they didn't know how I can't carry them in my backpack and people look at me
10.30 THIS! So frustrating.
Have you had someone use the word not normal instead of the word non disabled
I am peshent abuot disability too
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