LOW BUY CHECK-IN | I SLIPPED UP - ANXIETY, DEBT, DECEMBER GOALS 💸
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ส.ค. 2024
- Hello Low Buy Beauties! I have an overdue Low Buy Check-In for you today. I had a kind of rough November mentally and emotionally, and found this anxiety definitely crept into my Low Buy. I shopped on impulse over Black Friday week, and purchased a NOT NEED as a response to how I was feeling over this month. I definitely had a lapse in judgement and let myself fall into a moment of self-sabotage.
I'm checking in today with debt repayment, my relationship with this slip-up, and my thoughts on where I am taking myself into December and the New Year with my Low Buy and with my TH-cam Channel. 🙏🏻
How did you November go and where do you see your December going? Remember, this is a marathon and not a race. There will be slips, trips, and set-backs. It's what you decide to do with those challenges that help you grow and keep moving forward. xo
PEOPLE WHO INSPIRE & MOTIVATE ME:
DAVE RAMSEY bit.ly/2Hw7zwJ
MATT D'AVELLA bit.ly/2LMGyGF
HANNAH LOUISE POSTON - NO BUY and BEAUTY BUDGET bit.ly/2HsWmgh
AJA DANG bit.ly/2HuKx9m
THANK-YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING! ❤️
COME SAY HI 👋🏻
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ABOUT ME:🌿
Hi, I'm Christina - I'm a blogger slash vlogger slash human on the internet slash pharmacist sometimes, hence the "apothecary" theme in my name. I'm currently living in Toronto, Canada and on my channel you'll find fashion and styling videos, lifestyle content and check-in's on my LOW BUY YEAR. I'm happy to take any requests, too! Your girl is flexible (not physically). Feel free to leave me a comment below - I always make sure to read and respond, and I love chatting with you guys. Be sure to follow me on Instagram too - that's where I post my daily outfits and photography, and where I interact with you guys the most. Thank you SO much for watching and taking the time out of your day to support my teeny little channel. Love xx, Christina.
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Thank you SO much for all the amazing support, fam ❤️ - I think it’s important to be candid about how I still struggle with impulse purchases, coveting and wanting things. There will be ups and downs in this, and sharing that reality is important to me❤️
Great video! What a great year for you! I'm so happy to be able to see your journey ❤️. A low buy is hard. I have tried this year to be aware of my spending...but sometimes I get confused on feeling guilty or happy from purchasing an item that checks all my boxes....
I adore you and I can't wait to see what's in store for you this coming year ❤️.... And those boots 🙃
Be kind to yourself. I think overall progress is more important than perfection. I slipped up too and bought twice as much as I intended last week-all from my list but still. It’s a process right?
can we see the boots, at least? :)
I really appreciate your honesty, I have been trying to address my overspending issues for a year and every time I stop paying full attention I fall over, it really helps to see someone else articulate how I feel about myself when it happens, it makes me feel like I can manage this rather than give up on myself- thank you xx
Girl, you only bought one pair of boots. For like, almost an entire YEAR, that is all you bought. They were on your wishlist for a while so they were not that much of an impulse decision, and they were on sale, and you still love them and are going to wear them! Don't be so hard on yourself, because - the way I see it - you're being pretty damn successful with this low buy year. Don't beat yourself up - sure, a slip up may not be ideal, but it's not the end of the world either! :) You're beautiful, you're doing great, and you should be very proud of yourself.
Catarina Félix 😭😭 thank you so much! I just feel undue pressure on myself (fully put upon myself by myself!) to stick to my rules all the time and stick to my plan to keep my inspired and to hopefully keep you guys inspired too. It’s that all or bone tendency that I have and that I’m trying to work on. Thank you SO much for your support - it means the world, honestly ❤️❤️
Yeah I totally agree with this. You loved the boots, you thought about them for a while, you bought them in the sale. That’s exactly what healthy shopping should be so well done xx
Really agreeing w/Catarina here. Stop beating yourself up. YOU ARE HUMAN! Low buy is not no buy so you are meeting your goal. What would happen if you had no debt? Then would it be ok to buy whatever? 👀 You are going to buy things, everyone buys things. You see an improvement and are doing well. If you’re concerned about anxiety then deal with that aspect (keep talking to someone to help you, not only to us as though confessing; you did nothing wrong!). By the way you didn’t get that debt overnight. You will not get rid of it overnight. Furthermore you’ve got the answers, just keep putting in the work! #qualifiedmentalhealthprovider btw, u r not alone!! ✋🏾
Absolutely. Would love to see pictures of them!
This is coming from a place of support, not criticism - you bought a pair of boots, which may have set you back, but you are beating yourself up disproportionately to the purchase. It was hard to watch because, in short, I identify with your mindset. Purchasing a pair of boots isn’t a failure, it’s a setback. You are making progress and have a good understanding or your financial situation. I hope you regroup, and keep moving forward. You are doing great!
I had a major slip up on black friday.. i bought sooo much stuff. Like an online anxiety-ridden shopping frenzy i couldnt control. Lingerie, bedding, clothes, makeup.. my boyfriend helped me by pushing me, saying that i cant break my budget so i have to return it. Im doing that now :)
I completely broke down and cried "i just want a Beautiful life". And Thats how it is for me. I want to be a far better version of myself. I want a far fancier life.. thank you for sharing, it makes me feel less alone :)
These videos show a lot of vulnerability and authenticity. Much respect to you!
My goal is to stop buying unnecessary things, but if it adds to value to my life and I can keep it for a long time, than I gladly spend money on it. I also believe that it helps with the motivation to stay consistent with the low buy.
I really appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. You are an inspiration!
Adeeba Deterville thank you so much ❤️
Just really enjoy your boots, don’t feel guilty, it’s ok to treat yourself once in a while. Thanks for your honesty, anxiety is really difficult and I’m sorry you are feeling that way.
Sounds like you had a break through. Some times we have to repeat an old habit to learn from it. Sounds like you learned a lot and the anxiety could be a way of helping you move to the next step of your journey. We are all human, which means we make mistakes. How we move forward from the mistake is growth 👍. Great video and thank you for the honesty 🥰
I was at that point a few years ago and only this year I feel I turned the page. It is a long walk because the shopping is connected to a deep sense of happiness, fulfilment and /or control. It's more than being superficial, it's a way of protecting yourself from the world.
Don't be so harsh!
You are doing great. It’s Ok to have a slip up. Just keep going and enjoy those boots. 🙌🏻🤩💞
Camilla Kristiansen they are very fun haha thank you SO much ❤️❤️❤️😭
this channel (especially videos like this one) is keeping me focused but also gentle with myself when i slip up
I also started a low buy with a budget which hasn’t been very successful
But it’s okay I’m seeing progress and I want to learn I have rules that I have to follow to learn how I can control the impulse to buy whenever I’m bored, stressed or lonely
I now concentrate on the feeling of using something up
Or wearing something for years until it’s broken
And not on the buying process
You are such an inspiration. Remember you are human! Thanks for sharing! I am also trying to pay off debt and learning mindful financial awareness when purchasing anything! Seriously thanks for posting this!
i think as long as you aren’t putting yourself into debt and still putting large amounts of money on your loans since that is your goal, you are doing good! don’t bet yourself up. i adore your journey.
if it's the start of a new relationship, that will definitely cause anxiety in all areas of our lives. If it helps, I started brisk walking when I went through a heavy time of anxiety and it really helped zap it. For me it was fear induced and I spend the time walking for self talk and telling myself that regardless of what happens, I will be okay.
You're NOT a failure. You are human and have the best of intentions for your life and others. Thank you for sharing. It means a lot to the people in your community because at one time or another we all have felt this way. Stay strong & positive and do it rocking you new boots! 😎❤
Take it this way..the pair of boots are a means of rewarding yourself for all your hard work and how much you've been a SUCCESS on this low buy year. Nobody's perfect ;)
Also your ability to acknowledge your fragility..should be a realisation of how strong you are, realising your "mistakes" and being able to get rise above yourself xo
I want to say that you are doing great!! I have been on an intentional low-buy/no-buy this year. And I purchased a rain coat on black friday because i truly needed a good waterproof jacket, but i still feel super guilty for buying it, even though it was a legitimate need. I feel you!!!
It’s courageous to be putting it all out there. Been on this journey for almost 4 years and it takes time to unravel old reward patterns and habits. Advertising is everywhere to entice us and I definitely held on to a “you worked hard.....you deserve it” attitude for treating myself. It’s a growth and learning process. Learn....move on....enjoy the damn boots. Finding joy in life victories would not feel as empowering if one did not struggle at times to get there.
Last year, I spent a lot during Black Friday, mostly due to fear of missing out on deals. This year, I didn't even feel the urge to shop on BF. This is to say that progress is possible! A turning point for me was when I became aware of the anxiety that came over me when I was looking at ads for sales and discounts. Now I recognize that feeling as a sign that shopping at that moment is not a healthy thing for me to do.
You are NOT a failure! You are human. We all slip up every once in a while. Don’t beat yourself up, just acknowledge your moment of weakness and move forward with determination toward your goals! You’ve got this!
dancer gal 😭😭😭 thank you SO much - so do you! Xo 💪🏻
Completely agree with all the other comments; you’re doing amazing and you’re such an inspiration to me. Your videos help me understand my behavior. I was planning on not buying anything during BF but then I slipped up too and bought boots and a pair of wool trousers. Both items I had been eyeing for a couple of months, so same as your boots, it’s not really impulse but it kinda is as well. Been feeling guilty but also I have learnt that I probably shouldn’t totally cut my budget for clothes during BF, it’s not realistic and I only end up being disappointed in myself. So I try to twist it: I actually kept myself from buying many more things I wanted and I bought two things I have been wanting for a good deal instead of full price. I’m all for being a little kinder to ourselves, thank you for reminding me of that!
i appreciate how open, honest, vulnerable you are in this video. this is what we all feel on our respective journeys to improvement, but i bet very few would be able to talk about it openly like you do. thank you and sending supportive thoughts!
Hi Christina, I just discovered your channel today and it was like looking into a mirror. I’m graduating from pharmacy school in a few months and I’m terrified of facing my mountain of student loan debt. I’m so thankful that I found a fulfilling profession that contributes to society, but it is so disheartening to know that I’ll have this cloud hanging over my head for the foreseeable future. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone and you’ve already made huge strides towards your goals. Don’t lose sight of your accomplishments when you hit an obstacle. Everyone has their own passions, it just so happens that fashion is a pricey one. Finding your videos has given me some confidence that I can kick my shopping habits and adopt more financial responsibility. Thank you!
I think you're being too hard on yourself. Repaying $6500 in loans in one month is impressive. I say enjoy the boots and know that you have returned to your low buy plan for December.
I struggle with the all or nothing mentality a lot myself, so I found this really encouraging. I’m sorry you’re feeling dissatisfied and disappointed with yourself but also it’s good to hear how you’re able to see all the small steps of success you had like keeping in the budget and thinking about purchasing the boots before you actually did. 💜
Thank you for your transparency! I too am going through the same thing with getting out of debt while having a spending addiction. You’re doing amazing and don’t be so hard on yourself. You are truly inspiring!
This is a fantastic series. Thank you for doing it. And thank you for doing it so vulnerably! Not only does it inspire me to evaluate my money, but it also honestly depicts how challenging that process can sometimes be, and shows you pushing through it anyway. Very cool.
The fact that you are willing to open your heart to us is incredible and more valuable than you know 🙏💕
Thank you for being so candid and vulnerable. I would imagine sharing your feelings of guilt and shame are tough but I think sharing that struggle resonates with so many of us particularly for those of us who who struggle with perfectionism. Thank you again.
Girl, you paid $6,600 of debt in ONE month! That is such an amazing accomplishment. I paid off 40,000 in credit card debt and my biggest monthly payment never surpassed 5,500 and that was because of a windfall for backpay for a salary increase and promotion. You are doing great! As long as you wear and enjoy the boots, don't feel bad. I love the honesty. Capitalism is hard, babe. That's why we're two very strong, smart women who find ourselves struggling. Move on, get through the holiday season, enjoy your capsule wardrobe. Most importantly enjoy those boots. Your why is still yours and its still there.
FYI, I am trying to pay off my student loans after paying off credit card debt. It is so hard, it's been 2 years. I'm so ready to be done. Even though you've recently started your journey, you have no idea how your videos have helped me.
A failure and fraud? Far from it, you're beautifully human and this video exemplifies that. You are not alone in this struggle and I appreciate your sharing your journey. Keep pressing forward, the best has yet to come!
It’s kind of a relief to hear that you are struggling too sometimes... I had a very bad November as well and I felt ashamed but I tried to tell myself that it’s ok. I‘m feeling so much more confident about the December and that it’s going to be better this month :) I really enjoy your videos because you are so honest with yourself and with us. And sometimes that’s all I need ❤️ nice greets from Germany 🤗
You bought boots that were not an impulse but you didn't go off the rails after that purchase. It shows your getting a handle on your purchases and finances. Good Job!
Ok. Recommending another. What Kate finds:year of simple and then year of 5 finds. I'd watch in that order. Takes her through the last 2 yrs of shopping habits from adict to thoughtful shopper. It's been interesting watching her process emotions and habits. And she has money to spend/no budget, so there's no self guilt on that front but it allows her to move past that piece and on to a deeper why do I need to shop, spend, consume, etc. It's really helped me-I started shopping (goodwill is my budget... Actually I've never had a budget for clothes, meaning $0, but I was going to therapy and then taking time alone and that let me think, process, be an adult away from my kids, treat myself, etc. But quickly became a poor habit and one which I need to break. So I appreciated her thoughts as well as Alyssa beltempo, and Audrey Coyne, who focus on loving your clothes as an extention of self and yourself as opposed to chasing the images you see everyday... And Daria andronescu really has a great sense of self too which she imparts through her method if wonder (capsule) wardrobe. Therapy is also a helpful component for me;) happy journeys. I find you thoughtful. Be inder to yourself;) (I always need reminders of that) your progress is impressive!
I admire you for being able to share so openly all the feelings and insights that I think must be hard to admit. Truly inspiring. Love your channel. Fingers crossed. 😊
Love your honesty
Your so vulnerable and open
Your recent videos inspire me to be more mindful with what I spend my money on
$6500 off on a loan is freaking awesome!! You encourage me every time I watch your videos and this one is no exception. You were not frivolous with the boot purchase - unless they cost you $6500. A lo-buy is a good goal. How about a lo-shouldn’t goal too and stop beating yourself up for being human?
I am really enjoying watching your journey! Thank you for sharing! Setbacks happen, just move forward
Thank you so much for your honesty! Perfection is impossible in any journey so seeing some struggle is a little encouraging for those of us who have a few more slips 😅 During this season of purchase, promotion and sales this was super thoughtful and encouraging for me personally, thank you!
Thanks for being so honest such a great reminder to accept perfection is imposible and we are enough. Thank you again for your videos
Every diet needs a little cheat meal. Don't deny yourself every pleasure to achieve your goal. You've scaled back so much and made a huge achievement this month. I struggle with that all or nothing mindset sometimes, but I'm trying to remember to be more kind to myself. Pay yourself a compliment. Give yourself a pamper session (that doesn't cost more money)... hang in there!
Thank you Alexa! You’re totally right. Finding that middle ground is so difficult for me, which is why I felt so catastrophic at the time. Now I’ve been wearing my boots and feel cool as hell and really enjoy them. It’s a learning for me though, because I really did ignore the self control and thought I usually put into a purchase before I make it. Just all things to take notice of and move forward with for sure! Love the cheat meal analogy - def taking that one to heart! ❤️
@@Christinamychas Yay! I'm so glad the boots are in good graces now, as silly as that sounds. I really love these sorts of videos, it's important to see the struggle as well as the success! :)
Thank you for sharing. Try to be gentle with yourself. You are human, not a robot. Making a mistake/impulse buy does not negate your success. You are doing great! Keep it up!
Hi Christina. I just discovered your channel today and this video blew me away. I give you sooooo much credit for being able to talk about and share the feelings and emotions which often times can be absorbing. I've had a problem over the years of wanting certain pieces of clothes (shoes/leather bags are my soft spot) My wife tells me I should not feel overwhelmed when these intrusive thoughts take over. I have a hard time letting myself off the hook. Watching your video was really awe inspiring. I give you so much credit for being so honest and forthright on the challenges you try to overcome...I know that's something I have to learn to do a better job on. Sometimes the anxiety takes over and I get very overwhelmed. I have a hard time talking about this because I'm afraid its going to show a weakness that I don't want to escape from the safety of my own mind. sorry I'm getting carried away I guess. You are so open about your feelings and it's really a breath of fresh air to watch. I really like your honesty and openness. You have a gift to share emotions and I respect that. Thanks for being so honest. It's wonderful. Have a good night.
I just discovered your channel recently and I know this video is 2yrs old but I feel like Dave Ramsey has really done a number in some people's self worth and self compassion. And I really hear you on struggling to find the right balance and the middle ground. I've been starting to feel like for ppl who love beautiful, well-made things, it's especially hard living in a world of social media and capitalism. When I don't allow myself to he exposed to those things I do much better and its SO easy to get pulled in.
You are doing so brilliantly, don’t be hard on yourself, going against mass consumerism is extremely difficult. Appreciate and love and enjoy your new boots or you will ruin them for yourself. You deserve to have them and wear them your are repaying debt in a very disciplined way 😁👍🏻
I really feel like you took the words out of my mouth. I am exactly the same with no middle ground as you put it. It's always either one thing or the other. I am like this with everything. This is why I also feel like a failure with shopping all the time. I have a list of things that I covet and sometimes I can be thinking about these things for over a year. Once I do end up getting these things, they will only be replaced with something else eventually. It's like that void that will never be filled. I have a void that will not be filled until I stop trying to 'curate' myself into something via material possessions and realise I am enough. I bought an apartment and I should be paying that off aggressively but instead I slipped up during Black Friday and ordered a hoodie, sunglasses and a dress... all wants... even though I told myself I wouldn't buy anything I want to thank you for sharing your failures as well as your wins. It's amazing to see content like this on TH-cam. I am so thankful and it gives me hope that I might one day be where you are at even now. I can't lie, while I was listening to you speak, I was wondering where your amazing green sweatshirt was from and when you mentioned it, I made a mental note to go check it out... that's where I am at...
I feel the same way. I really hope you've managed to work on that. I recently realized I needed to work on loving myself because no dress, no book, no shoes are going to fill the void. It's all wants and no needs. I am enough, and I don't really need anything. What I'm looking for is not in that stuff. I hope you are in a better place now. :)
Imagine where you would be financially and emotionally if you didn't have a low-buy year. Not only have you come a long way and bettered your life, you have inspired lots of us to do the same. Tally up the year and then give yourself a big ol' pat on the back! Thank you for your honesty and inspiration!
No one is perfect, You still motivate me to work on my finances . ❤
Hang in there!!! You truly do need to recognize how well you’re doing, and one boot purchase doesn’t negate all of your progress. Consider it your one gift to yourself, move past it, and wear the F out of those boots to justify buying them!!! Keep going, you got this! ❤️
Ok, yeah I did HORRIBLY in November and early December. The shame is real. The pain of the shame is real. So watching this has helped. I’m redoubling my commitment to myself that for the rest of this month and headed into the new year that I will do better, because I know better. I think this process isn’t necessarily linear? Like any other bad habit (addiction) its a process of 3 steps forward, 2 steps back-and then trying for those 3 steps forward again. Wishing you strength and peace!
As someone who used to smoke ( so I was an addict ) when you give up smoking , there is no middle ground , your a smoker or a non smoker . I think that because of your career you have so much temptation. It’s just that you are into the high stakes clothes and boots etc ( so a slip can be big financially, I guess) . I know that buying clothes is addictive and it’s so good that you are able to share how you are feeling . It sounds like you are on quite a good level of earning , do you own your home ? Do you want to one day own your own home ? It’s definitely about your bigger picture , where you see yourself in 5 years time etc . One day at a time , but keep going , don’t give up . What you are doing can change your life forever so don’t lose sight of your goal xx
Slips are part of any recovery from any problem/addiction! So is the shame and guilt that comes with it! It’s not about the boots! But the loss of control and loss of agency and your addict behaviour make you upset. We can be our own worst enemies. Just sit with it, like you said yourself, being sad is ok. And when you’re ready, keep trudging. I love that you are no posterchild, I don’t like posterchildren. You are a real human and this stuff is hard! And relateable! Thankyou for being to open and honest - getting it out and finding support are so important in this process. Sorry if i sound preachy - it’s just that I am dealing with similar stuff and your videos came at exactly the right time. You are doing great and inspiring us by sharing this. Grey areas are hard and messy and unclear! And a lot of reality exists in the grey areas.. Remember this bad feeling and instead of beating yourself up, maybe you can use it to remind yourself that the instant gratification of shopping doesn’t begin to make up for all this sadness and anxiety. Even though in the moment, those feelings are hard to remember sometimes. Progress, not prefection though. You seem like a beautiful person inside and out - no matter how stylish you dress or what stuff you have or don’t have. Because you try hard and you share your complexities with the world. Keep it simple and take it one moment at a time! You are doing great, don’t give up. Lots of love from a stranger
Thank you so much. You hit the nail on the head with all of your lovely words. You can always depend on the kindness of strangers 🥰
Thank you for sharing! I also had a slip up on Black Friday, and I have been beating myself up about it. I hope you can enjoy the boots, learn, move on, and keep crushing your debt repayment goals!
New follower here and thus far, you've become my favorite. I admire how conscious you are of the things you say and your entire low-buy approach. It's inspiring. I respect your discipline and thoughts on your purchase because no one understands the conditions you're under, only you do. I like to think circumstances like those must happen for us to find our way back on track. Like emptying some of ourselves out to allow more of ourselves in.
Enjoy your new boots - they sound awesome! I'm trying to do a low buy as well (I don't have any debts but I'm trying to save money for emergencies, travel, life...) but when I find a piece of clothing that fits perfectly in my style and taste I buy it and enjoy it until it falls apart. I believe that clothes, shoes, bags we put on our bodies become part of us and should suit our personality (help us create the person we want to be) perfectly.
I ended up spending about $150 on Black Friday. On clothes and makeup. But I held myself from buying a lot more than I wanted to.
I am so sorry that you are struggling Christina. We are here for you. ❤️
Do you think there is something to be said about you wanting to emulate this style instagrammer you talked about in the video?
Day Explains It All it’s a trigger for sure - I will have to unfollow. I think I really need to focus on why I still feel the need to project an image instead of working on getting confident with myself and the image I already have naturally ❤️
Day Explains It All and THATS amazing that you stuck to your limitations in BF spending - I love it! Xo 😘
style apotheca I hope you know how many of those are inspired by YOU-not who you feel you need to be.
I’ve been struggling on doing low buys to the point sometimes I want to quit.. but I’ve trying to see the positive change that I’ve been progressing on, even if it’s small. You have definitely have been an inspiration for that. I thank you for being honest but I thank you more for keep working on your goals regardless of your “slips” because that is also so inspiring! This month I slipped hard too. Specially with gifts (it’s my love language, so I didn’t stick to budget when buying things for others). I also got “new” clothes for myself which was a rule of mine I broke. I feel shitty but watching this lift me up. It reminded me that I’m still human, but I can be a better human. I want to remember this feeling next paychecks to keep me on track. Thank you again for this videos ❤️
I love you sooo much for your honesty.. I am 51 years old and I promise, you are helping me immensely.. you did say LOW not NO🤗
Giiirl, don't be so hard on yourself. It is really great that you have the willpower to continue with the challenge even if it is so hard. I admire people like you, since I don't have the willpower, I give up easily, and I cannot do these types of challenges FOR A WEEK. I am failing on the 3rd or 4th or 5th day, but this 2020 I was hoping that I have the strength same as you to start. Just keep up the good work, as long as you don't give up, you're on the right track. Loveyou!
I think your journey is amazing. You are making such great progress compared to your past. While you are disappointed, at least you recognized the problem after the fact rather than blowing it off. That in itself shows tremendous growth! I am so proud of you and appreciate that you are sharing your journey with us.
Thank you Sami! ❤️❤️
hi Christina, just came across your channel and I've been binge watching your low buy videos... there is so much that I resonate with and that you've helped me acknowledge and articulate in my own life and just want to thank you for being so honest and open about your journey. Coming from the position of someone who has tried to low/no buy for many months, I guess we all slip up and realising it is the most important so don't be too hard on yourself (I'm also someone who thinks in all or nothing and am learning to grow out of it too hahaha)!! Just a thought, when I realised that shopping was my way of relieving stress, the first thing to do was to stop shopping, but then it was also important to replace the "stress relieving habit" with something else so that when times get hard, shopping isn't my go to. Still a journey for me as well and glad to have found like minded people to journey together. Continue to persevere!!! Hope your booties become something for you to enjoy rather than an object of guilt x
I have felt the same way before...one solution when i made an impulse purchase was to leave it at my parents house until i've reached a particular savings (or debt payoff) goal so you can change the mindset that these didn't set you back or cause you to fail
Most relatable video on the internet. THANK YOU. Keep posting please.
Take it easy on yourself!! You didn’t charge the boots you didn’t add to your debt. That’s a win!! Think of that as a reward for the great work you’ve done and move on❤️
People trip up, especially during BF/CM and sale season in general. It’s better that you caught yourself during this mini slip up than travel down the slippery slope of mindless buying again. Just making this video shows that you have come so far from where you started. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Enjoy the boots and let them be a reminder of this moment and how you’ve learned from it. Thank you for showing your vulnerability and being so honest, I am sure that wasn’t easy ❤️
Hope your coming days will be filled with light and happiness 💕
This video definitely earned you another subcriber. I've been going through many of the same things and I've had a very hard time finding vloggers who have a similar perspective, similar motivations in their moments of failures, etc. And many financial journey vlogs portray this as though you have to get it right immediately and not slip up in order for your growth to be legitimate.
I totally feel you. Try to focus on positive aspects - what you already did! - rather than on this purchase. It helped you to ask yourself a lot, after all, it is not a failure, it is something new you learnt about yourself.
I usually try to think about the "why i am doing the journey", as you said, and on the "why i bought it anyway" or "why i want to buy something now". I usually understand it is why i am upset, anxious, depressed. Then i look for alternatives: what makes me happy and is not shopping? To me, visiting museums, concerts, cinema, theatre is the solution. I feed my sould rather than my closet, even because i know that happiness will last longer than the one i feel after a purchase.
Look for your own solutions, it's a long and difficult path, remember that if you did it already, you can do it again in the future. Focus on this positive aspect, not on what went "wrong"! 💕
I think you are being far too hard on yourself (as we all are on ourselves often). You are making fantastic progress! Your videos have really helped me on my goals to become a much more conscious consumer, thank you. You are very brave & altruistic, I hope you really enjoy those boots & think of all the people you have helped with this video.
I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. I relate to everything you’ve said. I have a shopping problem that I can’t seem to overcome. 😘
Good on you for your honesty. Enjoy your purchases. You need to treat yourself.
It's not about depervation, it's about being a responsible consumer. I watched that video it helped me. Thank you🤗
Mickey O that is definitely an amazing angle to think about - I never looked at it that way ❤️❤️ thank you
You are so motivating--I really appreciate your honesty and vulnerability in sharing this with us. (You're only human!) I've slipped up, too. Also, I very much relate to the black and white/perfectionist mindset--I too tend to focus on my mistakes much more than my successes and can be extremely hard on myself. I'm trying to get out of that mindset, because for me it ends up making me feel less motivated and more shame. It's also why I "quit" Dave Ramsay (I didn't quit, really, I just stopped using his products). After completing my emergency fund, I've started paying down my debt--but I haven't been paying it as aggressively as perhaps Dave would agree with. I realized that I wanted to treat myself *occasionally* and get takeout once in a while, and that if I tried to live like a pauper for literally years, it wouldn't really heal my relationship with stuff/spending. It would just be punishing--making me feel ashamed and miserable while I paid down my debt. (Not that other people have to go this route, btw, it's just what works for me.) I kind of liken it to restrict/binge--going full no-buy for me increases the WANT and LACK feelings far more than working toward lifelong minimalism.
You are lovely being so honest and analysing your life. We all are just humans and struggle with different kinds of temptations and challenges. Love!
Really appreciated this video. So much “hard”. I have been feeling similarly lately about other stuff. So really appreciate your words.
I don’t have any debt, but this is how I feel almost every time I spend money unnecessarily. Don’t beat yourself up over what you cannot change, but do strive to do better. You can’t really “afford” it until you’re debt-free. But thank you for sharing your struggle - I can relate so hard!
Oh girl, the icky Toronto weather has gotten us all down. The fact that you actually wanted them and will love them already makes a huge, huge difference. We are all vulnerable sometimes and we are all allowed to have moments of weakness. We live we learn and we improve from who we were, and that is just the nature of life. Make some tea, breathe, write down everything you want to remind yourself in big black sharpie markers, and stick it up all over your place. You are already actively keeping your goals in check, and we are all rooting for you in your journey. You got this.
Hey Christina i was checking decluttering topic and came across here, and i have to say:I feel you! Don't feel overwhelmed and guilty! you are doing wonderful job, you are one step closer to debt free and your anxiety will be decreased ! You are motivating other people like me, so keep shining!
what I notice with myself in all of my struggles with my character flaws is that they take time to change. We tend to do the same crap over and over until we learn - and it takes some repetition. Have mercy on yourself! :)
First of all, you’re very inspirational and encouraging to a lot of people (me! 🙋♀️) and are helping us out with this. Yes, we look to you for advice as to things that have worked for you, but anyone who thinks you *shouldnt* have bought the boots needs to calm down. You need to give yourself grace and not beat yourself up about it so much.
Let me put it this way: say you had a friend who had gone from eating pretty much whatever to going on a really strict diet for an extended period of time. No cheat days, just grinding it out. Say she had this restaurant she had really been wanting to try for a long time, and there’s an event where the meal is partially comped. If your friend went and ate there, “breaking” her diet, you wouldn’t think less of her. You wouldn’t judge her or think she hadn’t been successful simply for that. Again, it’s all about perspective and giving yourself grace. You’re still rocking this no buy and will continue to do so, and you can just chuck it up to a lesson learned, and enjoy your new boots! 😉
You are absolutely not a failure. Failure is not trying and you've gone above and beyond to try your best.
Enjoy your boots, you can keep taking steps towards your goals in them. :)
I admire your honesty and bravery. Thank you for sharing your experience.
Thanks for sharing all these thoughts. I'm working on my own journey and I appreciate you putting that all out there. Thank you thank you thank you!
#StyleApothecaSquad!!🙋🏾♀️💜 Love this and soo Needed this right now. I ended up shopping for Black Friday as well. My why is Purchasing My Home. We got this Love.
Myrna J such an amazing why!!! That’s mine too after my debt is paid - you’ve got this!
Comes a month late but you should not feel quilty you got your boots. You like them, you wear them, if you slipped so what life goes on and you know you now have them and the main thing is you are not buying another pair and you are content with your current wardrobe. Keep up the good work and most of all be gentle and kind to yourself 💕
🌺 Girl, I have been there. It's ok. Just start again. How about selling off some items you are no longer into & put that in your savings 🙂 You're still doing well!!
First of all I like to say I totally get you’re feelings. I think everyone that is trying to be a more conscious and smarter consumer understands.
But I do think if you keep being so hard on you’re self for it you’re going to be even more vulnerable to buying. You bought the boots, than felt some regret, got mad on yourself about it, though about why it happened, learned from it and in my opinion it now is time to let it go. Don’t forget but it, just keep it in you’re mind for the next time something like this is starting to happen, but forgive yourself for it. You did an amazing job paying back you’re loan. And yes you did buy the boots, but it would be a real shame if you spend that money on those boots and now don’t love them because you’re keep beating yourself up about spending the money. It happened. You can’t do anything about it anymore than learn from it and just enjoy the hack out of those boots! But I now that is easier said than done. And I am on the easy side this time. And you probably already now this you’re self. Some time past since you recorded this video and posted it, and I hope that you feel better. Lots of love Esmeralda
Ugh I feel everything you said. I always have a fantasy self in mind that I know will never happen but I still strive for it. I swear my fantasy self looks not like myself. It has different hair a different like profile and stature so I’ll never be like that. But I still make myself feel like shit by striving for something that is impossible. It’s not me! It’s also like seeing someone wearing stuff and I’m like wow they look so chic and effortless and then I try the same stuff or get it and I don’t feel any of that on me and it makes me feel worse. Literally I have the same mindset and I’m glad I’m not alone. But you are doing so well. I had a bad month of spending money but I’m trying not to beat myself up for it. Sorry for my rant but thank you for sharing and being so vulnerable. It’s very helpful for so many.
Great vid. I put my hand up for slipping too, but that's all it is. Do better next time. We would all love a clean spotless record for a whole year, but that's a really high bar. I broke my vows on an impulse too. It's true that the alter ego conveniently stops the "who you want to be" from thinking for a while, the ego wants what it wants and it likes to show up unexpectently, and demands satisfaction. One has to be on guard even when they're feeling good. Maybe the ego loves when we self hate, then we wallow, stay low. Why not defeat that annoying ego and say get out of my head, I have another plan, get through one moment, one temptation, at a time. There will always be another chance to try again. It's like an amazing game of pacman with an endless roll of quarters. It's good it you can get to the end, but it's more about the journey. Remember YOU are helping people. Most of us just spend for ourselves, you share with an honest motive to help. It's nice.
I am a new subscriber ❤️ You are so inspiring and honest. I am starting my first ever low buy year. I've tried no buy before and made it one month. I love, love, love Shea Whitney. She's funny, sparkling, beautiful but a HUGE trigger for me. I won't stop watching her videos but definitely will start watching my bank account . I'm fighting a lot of guilt as well. Enjoy your boots. Wear them to get back on the horse🤗
I was struggling all week after your black friday video post. My inbox was flooded every other hour with emails to buy and cave in. I didnt fall for the trap. However i had to purchase items for s new job which i put some items on my credit card. 😭. Unexpected expense. I know next week i can pay it all off and add extra money to pay off student loans.
Also Dont be too hard on yourself with the boots purchase. It could have been worse. You held yourself together well.
Thank you for your low buy vids.
New follower and I also am adopting the low spend lifestyle and trying to only bring in 20 items into my life in 2020. For me, it will be hard because I love to shop for my home, kids, fashion etc. cut yourself some slack. You are human and it’s ok to reward yourself. 🙌🏻😉
Thank you so much for sharing this. This is exactly what I needed to hear!
"you have financial cancer" - that one always gets me, Dave is hilarious haha
When I was in Weight Watchers a few years ago, they allowed a small daily indulgence that really helped to relieve the feeling of deprivation that came from limiting what I ate. They also said that if we screwed up, just start over the next day. Why not put a little indulgence money in your budget for stress relief? Also, a shoppers’ support group might be helpful, if that exists in your area. I also recommend checking out Shoshana Zuboff’s video on surveillance capitalism, which will open your eyes to how the system is manipulating us.
You are only human. At least it was a considered purchase, something you had wanted for a long period of time. Just make sure you are happy when you wear them and don't continue to beat yourself up x
I think we just expect soo much of ourselves all the time. I feel it's good to try to change but I think having self-compassion is also important. 1) You are on a journey. There is no linear improvement. 2)Nobody is perfect. Even if they may pretend on social media that they may be. Don't expect yourself to be. You are trying. And that is impressive.
When I went down this journey I sold a lot of my things and used some on debt but I still maintained a clothes sinking fund. I did keep my sinking fund in cash....so no online shopping. However, I did keep a list and then I would buy items I needed and pay cash for them. We are human and have to give ourselves grace so we pick ourselves up and go on. Thank you for the videos.
I’ve had a bad YEAR, REEEEEALLY bad....so don’t feel bad for a couple of things. Look how much you put towards debt! We are human and we slip and that is ok. Don’t be down on yourself ❤️❤️❤️ Could you declutter some things to swap out, like the “1 in, 1 out” rule?