James Acaster goes to house party, sleeps with girl, gets chased by dog - Classic Scrapes

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 17 พ.ย. 2024
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ความคิดเห็น • 149

  • @studiocelestedesign
    @studiocelestedesign 4 ปีที่แล้ว +217

    He really sounds like the sweetest, actually.

    • @hectormugwump5530
      @hectormugwump5530 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      He's a shining example of a person. I bloody adore him.

  • @ouiseylou
    @ouiseylou 6 ปีที่แล้ว +927

    My favourite thing about this is Acaster prefacing it with "I don't come off very well in this story" as though he's about to reveal he was a bit of a cad...and then nothing in the story can even be misconstrued as him being anything worse than a bit odd

    • @borismuller86
      @borismuller86 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Louise Emms ...a bit?

    • @LockSteady
      @LockSteady 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      I feel you... hell, I'm a dude and I'm enchanted

    • @swine13
      @swine13 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      To be fair, "a bit odd" is not "very well", so he's not lying.

    • @nouveaucourteduree9836
      @nouveaucourteduree9836 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@swine13 Honestly this story just made me want to kiss him 😂

    • @m.r.9127
      @m.r.9127 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      What is a cad

  • @memondayz
    @memondayz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +98

    Imagine all the untold scrapes James has just sitting in his head

  • @DanteneNyx
    @DanteneNyx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +128

    The “Happy Birthday” sealed it for me

  • @carveylover
    @carveylover 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    I love listening to the stories having to do with ladies. James is very very cute and he doesn't know how cute he is. My friend likes to call him a lanky noodle which he is.
    He is funny, smart, and handsome the total package. His awkwardness is part of his charm.

  • @rozturner8110
    @rozturner8110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +391

    To this day I wonder if that girl ever listened to this

  • @zaramalik3797
    @zaramalik3797 5 ปีที่แล้ว +205

    12:40 For some reason, I got really excited when James said he drank Snapple.
    13:40 TASKMASTER!! We know where you got that fact from now James.

    • @iurim
      @iurim 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I kinda remember this fact, in wich episode was it?

  • @esquilax5563
    @esquilax5563 5 ปีที่แล้ว +231

    Can't believe he forgot he said he was going to kiss her, that's hilarious 😂

  • @Sunnycolada
    @Sunnycolada 4 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    Don't get me wrong but James wasn't the player in this story the girl picked him up

    • @sofiaguerrero0969
      @sofiaguerrero0969 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Yeppp 😂 she’s the one that talked to him first, the one who reminded him of kissing her, and she’s the one that took him back to her place. James is so cute 😂😂

  • @AnnabellaRedwood
    @AnnabellaRedwood 5 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    I was getting dressed listening to this and totally lost it and fell on my bed and just laughed my head off! God I love James!!!!!

  • @astrangermagi
    @astrangermagi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +489

    "Uh, no never heard of her again. Can't blame her"
    "..."
    "..."
    "..."
    "JAMES ACASTER EVERYONE"

  • @MrGhostTheBigRoast
    @MrGhostTheBigRoast 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I came away from the story with a deeper admiration for the wonderful Mike Wozniak. What a gent.

  • @beckynelson6786
    @beckynelson6786 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    He tells a story so well.

  • @JehanineMelmoth
    @JehanineMelmoth 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    Ah, bless him. He’s a sweet boy.

  • @bladeeshotgf5500
    @bladeeshotgf5500 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    omg I would have died if he said “just so you know I’m going to kiss you” to me 🥲

  • @opame1560
    @opame1560 5 ปีที่แล้ว +153

    i LOVE josh’s laugh oh my lord what a happy sound

    • @Widdekuu91
      @Widdekuu91 5 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      You're on your own. :)

    • @jamieb7138
      @jamieb7138 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      If I met him in person I'd want to tell him to shut up every time he laughed, even his speaking voice is punchable

    • @TheDareD3vil
      @TheDareD3vil 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      B B even your online voice is punchable, so I guess you two share something in common.

    • @jamieb7138
      @jamieb7138 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@TheDareD3vil your hard

    • @Jennyfisch
      @Jennyfisch 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I kind of think it's like Jimmy Carr's laugh. Funny and contagious at first, but really annoying after a while.

  • @AE-gl6cb
    @AE-gl6cb 7 ปีที่แล้ว +274

    'the window of the party'

  • @cpt.kagoul
    @cpt.kagoul 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    This guy is on another level of comedy

  • @NoYeahNah
    @NoYeahNah 4 ปีที่แล้ว +147

    That's pretty much what my husband said to me the first night we met. "I am very sorry to interrupt your story, but I have been wanting to do this all night, so before I forget..." Kisses me. "Okay, carry on."
    He was also very drunk.

    • @leonchal
      @leonchal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Emma The great-grandchildren are going to love this story.

    • @sophielou2929
      @sophielou2929 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      fietfEit not to be cringe but that’s so fucking cute

  • @borismuller86
    @borismuller86 5 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    James’ life reminds me an uncanny amount of Mark from Peep Show.

    • @user-cm9sf7vs5h
      @user-cm9sf7vs5h 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      This sounds more like an Inbetweeners skit, we've all been there 😂

    • @Chigz10
      @Chigz10 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      lol this story has some parallels to the peep show episode 'on the pull'

  • @221b-Maker-Street
    @221b-Maker-Street 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I love that he calls her a _lady._ Ladies don't have to be 50, Josh! 🥰
    Am picturing James doing awkward push-ups on the tiny kitchen sofa. 🤣
    (I got my Wozniaks confused for a minute there, thought he was going to be talking about Steve Jobs' Apple co-founder. 📱🖥)

  • @cycc186
    @cycc186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Admiring your skills on the tiny sofa. Brilliant.

  • @itsmelive
    @itsmelive 7 ปีที่แล้ว +255

    smooth bricks.

  • @Maazin5
    @Maazin5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Mike Wozniak is such a gentleman

  • @crissy4445
    @crissy4445 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Why can’t he tell this story on stage!! Best thing I’ve ever fucking heard 😂😂

  • @dashiejinxx100
    @dashiejinxx100 6 ปีที่แล้ว +160

    Classic Alistair

  • @Widdekuu91
    @Widdekuu91 6 ปีที่แล้ว +93

    I was busy trying to craft with tíny gemstones and magnets.
    When he said 9:16 I just dropped the full amount of tiny stones from my hands and laughed my bum off. I'll have to spend ages cleaning the floor and re-glueing everything, but it was worth it.

    • @borismuller86
      @borismuller86 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Widdekuu91 ...are you a wizard?

    • @Widdekuu91
      @Widdekuu91 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@borismuller86
      :P Well, I cosplay Bellatrix Lestrange, if that answers your question. :)

  • @omaidsayed639
    @omaidsayed639 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    James told a woman that he was gonna kiss her after the story, that lady went on to be JK Ro- fuck he just said it in the video. thought i was so smart

  • @lewis4554
    @lewis4554 6 ปีที่แล้ว +308

    Do you think the girl ever listened to this? Hahahahah

    • @destroythehuman3380
      @destroythehuman3380 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Lewis - She’s probably calling him 24/7.. he’s gonna be money bags soon.

    • @cecilia927
      @cecilia927 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Destroy TheHuman they never exchanged names so no

    • @nousername1888
      @nousername1888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@cecilia927 until she sees him on tv and thinking "he looks oddly familiar"

  • @chankoey9147
    @chankoey9147 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Mike Wozniak. What a real gent.

  • @gracie4732
    @gracie4732 5 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    “this colander looks roomy”

  • @slipknot95maggot
    @slipknot95maggot 5 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    Ooh no you all def spend more than two weeks kissing 'cuz I'm pulling that average down quite a bit XD

  • @Sam1point2
    @Sam1point2 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    That just got better and better

  • @mrbackwards263
    @mrbackwards263 7 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Classic scrape. Love it.
    Keep scraping by x

  • @LockSteady
    @LockSteady 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    happy birthday? I fucking love this dude

  • @normplatt7549
    @normplatt7549 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Great chuckle brother!

  • @johnnyjohnson7416
    @johnnyjohnson7416 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Amazing story teller 😂

  • @cycc186
    @cycc186 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    James left this scrap out of the book he wrote. Want to know why as it was such a good story.

  • @donatask76
    @donatask76 6 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    James is very funny

  • @Amblin80s
    @Amblin80s 5 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    "Open up this dishwasher"... LOL

  • @kunkashi8208
    @kunkashi8208 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    These are so great!

  • @chicanery358
    @chicanery358 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Lol he shared that armadillo fact on taskmaster too

  • @jasonhenley1985
    @jasonhenley1985 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I would love to see a Friday night dinner style tv program based on these and at the end of each episode it comes up based on a true story.

  • @codyhannahmary83
    @codyhannahmary83 4 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    Why's this had only 280000 ish views. It's talking about James kissing.
    Who else wants to kiss James? 🙋🏼‍♀️

    • @theyearwas1473
      @theyearwas1473 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I'm straight but I'll give it the college try

    • @c.l.p.8363
      @c.l.p.8363 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      The thirst is real.

    • @Widdekuu91
      @Widdekuu91 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@c.l.p.8363
      To be fair, most of us haven't touched someone in at least a year.
      And some unlucky ones haven't touched someone in many years. Or never...imagine some poor 13-14 year olds that were about to get interested in dating and now this.

    • @dhaliazaid4479
      @dhaliazaid4479 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Widdekuu91 you're describing my life now😭✋🏼

    • @cazkiwinz4300
      @cazkiwinz4300 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      🙋🙋🙋

  • @DancingVioleta
    @DancingVioleta 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    happy birthday?

  • @222browneyes
    @222browneyes 6 ปีที่แล้ว +136

    Josh's laugh is horrendous.

    • @mrnickless
      @mrnickless 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      It's a very punchable laugh

  • @user-mp6sz6zq8n
    @user-mp6sz6zq8n 8 ปีที่แล้ว +155

    CABADGED

    • @BenJ0rdan
      @BenJ0rdan 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ben Whalley Gmail

    • @annmitchell4663
      @annmitchell4663 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Keep thinking who I could cabbage....lol

    • @chundering
      @chundering 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ben Jordan Ben this is gonna be really weird but I’m 100% sure we followed each other on Instagram in like year 8

    • @cbfedge5593
      @cbfedge5593 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@chundering that's pretty cool

    • @cbfedge5593
      @cbfedge5593 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Oi oi, Savoy

  • @robmckennie4203
    @robmckennie4203 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    2 weeks in your life is the same as 40 seconds a day for 80 years. have you spent 40 seconds seconds kissing someone today? i haven't

    • @YodasPapa
      @YodasPapa 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      It's one of those facts that sounds plausible until you think how anyone would ever work it out, and then you know it's completely made up.

    • @annesilva3542
      @annesilva3542 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Maybe tho my grandparents were married for 60 years and I saw them kiss every day, like a little good morning kiss and you got to think that some times you kiss for longer, half an hour kissing would knock 45 days of your math

    • @michael777e
      @michael777e 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Unfortunately I haven't even spent 40 seconds in the last 20 years

    • @Widdekuu91
      @Widdekuu91 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's important to find someone that can properly kiss though. I had the misfortune of dating a person that prefered the "washingmachine" technique.
      After 3 turns to the left, right and left with his tongue, he spat all the saliva he had, in my mouth.
      And he was absolutely godhonest convinced that this was how you kissed and refused to change his skillfull technique.
      I don't want to sound thirsty, but I am genuienly curious as to what a 'normal' kiss is like. (Which, knowing I've been in an adult relationship for 4,5 years, is a sad thing to say.)

    • @themaggattack
      @themaggattack 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Widdekuu91 Girl, move on! Go find you someone who can kiss!

  • @codyhannahmary83
    @codyhannahmary83 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    What I don't understand is 'i knew I wasn't really going to fit on the sofa'
    Cowgirl??? Even reverse cowgirl seems obvious on a small sofa.

    • @sofiaguerrero0969
      @sofiaguerrero0969 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think he wanted missionary? Idk he seems like the type.

  • @sarah3796
    @sarah3796 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    EEEeeeeeeeeee I want be that girl!!! so bad

  • @nix2939
    @nix2939 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    These are actually really hard to listen to with that constant laugh

  • @mimiluluXx
    @mimiluluXx 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    smoooth bricks

  • @Endoskeleton322
    @Endoskeleton322 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Oooohhhh MIKE not Steve!

  • @jamieb7138
    @jamieb7138 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Can you please let the man finish his story, instead of butting in with shit jokes and pointless comments

  • @piped1994
    @piped1994 8 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Wat a lad lol

  • @tasnimnaz7109
    @tasnimnaz7109 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    10:24 😂😂😂

  • @mrnickless
    @mrnickless 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Fucking Hell!! Josh Widdicombe is clearly too used to forcing laughter on The Last Leg. Painful.

  • @saar144
    @saar144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    He’s not gay? *weeping*

    • @oldgranite6467
      @oldgranite6467 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      He was married but his wife left him for Mr. Bean. Incredible but true

    • @sofiaguerrero0969
      @sofiaguerrero0969 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@oldgranite6467 it was a girlfriend, not wife

  • @YTSIMPY
    @YTSIMPY 8 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    haha

  • @ninjawhoya2073
    @ninjawhoya2073 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I wouldnt take Nish either

  • @adamtzsch
    @adamtzsch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    James is great, but the leprosy thing isn’t true.

    • @arandompersonr9136
      @arandompersonr9136 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      rats and mice can catch it as well

    • @luke-alex
      @luke-alex 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      To be honest, it didn't sound true, but it's hardly relevant

  • @bahjomohamed1636
    @bahjomohamed1636 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    This was annoying laughter

  • @ibraheemeastwood7022
    @ibraheemeastwood7022 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Is that it?

    • @nousername1888
      @nousername1888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I have a feeling ur not the real Simon Bird and on the off chance that is ur real name then i have the feeling ur not the guy from inbetweeners

  • @themonado5030
    @themonado5030 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This isn't very funny