Often times when someone rejects us or breaks up with us, what really hurts is the rejection itself - not the fact that we've lost that person. In truth, there may not have been anything that special about them, but it's the very fact that somebody doesn't seem to want us anymore - it's a sledgehammer to our ego. Most people are aware of the pychological phenomena that exists when someone pulls away from us or appears to lose interest, they suddenly appear much more attractive. When they were all over us and messaging us every day, we may not have been that interested in them. We place more value on things when we fear that we might be losing them. We need to be very honest with ourselves when someone walks out of our life: did we genuinely like them as a person, or are we just a bit miffed that they no longer appear to like us?
The root of all suffering is attachment to our desires. Awesome video! It teaches us to stop playing the victim role and acknowledge our self emotional control or lack of it. We can't control anybody except ourselves. People are free beings. We have the power to decide whether to put up with them or walk away.
This video broke my heart because it confirmed that for me it was love but I had to let the person go because you can’t make someone love you back. True love is to want to see the other person happy and be happy for them and realize they were not your person 💔
I had feelings for a person and realized he didn't feel the same way. I listened to the advice of psychics making me believe that he had feelings for me. As a result, I afflicted pain on myself by being involved in a unrequited love situation. Fast forward, I realized the man did not reciprocate and I was doing all the work. I faced reality and decided to take control of myself and let it go of unrequited love. It hurts because I kept thinking about what it could have been. Yet, I realized letting go was the best decision.
Don't listen to psychics and tarot readers, majority of them are full of shit and know that if they keep giving you false hope, you'll keep giving them money and clout
I am going through the similar situation with this difference, that i waited till he came clear one night, that he is not in love and never been, was like a cold shower to me.... then he left, saying is over.... sorry to say but still have feelings to him even that he doesn't love me, but think he did best to make me realize the truth, the period now after you have lost someone with who you have hoped for a future is just like a hell... heartbroken pain is incomparable...
Yes, the think when you spend enough time with a person you care about and they show consistency, kindness, patience and can sometimes take a blind eye to your flaws it may truly be love. I could fantasize about having a life with this person. Some people make better friends too. So important to give it time.
OMG!!!! i should have found this video earlier when i was so depressed of him rejecting and ignoring me. I cried everynight and day and cant move on till now, even i looked for tips over the youtube videos. But after seeing this video, I finally got what i really need to hear to help me moveon. Finally! so, it was just my ego and not what i thought was a real love. Thank you so much Susan. More power to you and to your videos.
There we go, thats what I needed to hear. I am capable of showing and having love, but your absolutely right about the bruised ego. Love is a long slow burn that develops over time.
Basic truth. Love is unconditional and I've learned through another person a friend that it feels wonderful, despite pains, yearning included. No bruised ego here. At least not today!
Very helpful. So hard to swallow that it's ego. All forms of denial come out that it's really love. Can get confusing at times. Especially if bad behavior is taken personally
So far the video's I've seen of yours are amazing; and this is no exception. Obsession is probably as intense as love, but the former is focused narrowly on outcome, where you almost seek to master or conquer the other.
What a fantastic insight, this reaction would never have occurred to me but it makes so much sense. I've recently gone through a breakup & found your channel - You truly are the best 👌
I have never heard someone put these seemingly difficult times into such simplistic and realistic terms that resonates with me a hundred percent. I just stumbled on to one of your videos and listened to you for FIVE minutes and am amazed at how easily you could call out a situation for exactly what it is/was. I love it! I think you are a wonderful, passionate and fierce female role model for us all trying to find our way and make sense of the world.
I think there are situations where both magnanimous love and wounded ego are present, and you have to choose which to honour. I don't think it's always so black and white.
Like the way you breakdown emotions and behaviour into pieces and explain them. It seems simple. Tnq. Understanding is good. Wonder if relationships can be had with such clinical knowledge. Bruised ego vs. Idea of love - point to ponder.
I’m only 14 and I was able to find this out by myself through a girl but I still know this girl and her teaching me so much abt myself makes me think she’s actually something but idk I’ll jus keep learning
I’m disappointed that my needs aren’t being met, basic needs isnt asking too much. I’ve been disappointed for so long I’ve rationalized putting up with dissatisfaction for far too long because of the few good things they have done. It’s not love, It’s denial and obligation.
I know I just found my own personal psychiatrist, Your knowledge and advice helped me out alot now I know what I have to do now, Thank You So Very Much Susan :)
So funny, I thought that this could help me to detach from the person better, but instead I realised that I truly care about them instead. Damn hahhhaaa 😀😀😀 Love is a special thing. Sometimes the only thing left is just to see the blessing of love...that even in hopeless situation, at least you fell in love, your heart is filled with it and then you let that person go, but *you keep the love!* 💝 Because, is it that person who made me feel love or is it me, who *allowed myself to feel deep love?* It is beautiful thing either way 💘💘💘
Thank you very much, you put some reason into my head. I just found out that my ex is in love, six months after the breakup and I just losted. I was so upset, jealous, hurt and I thought, it means it's love, I'm still in love... no I'm not, I wasn't for six months and I'm not now, now I know why I feel this way and I can deal with this emotions. You really helped me. Wow. Thank you and all the best 😊
What about when a partner intentionally presented a false persona due to insecurity? How can I love the real person if the real person was not presented to me?
Wow this video rlly opened my eyes. What if this annoyed feeling of wanting something you can’t have goes on for a year? Is it possible to not get over the impact rejection had on your ego for over a year? Or is it love?
Thanks beautifully convey, it seams that is a huge misinterpretation about what love is all about, what I have discovered is that love is not an emotion but the essence of what we are, if we don’t love our light then whom will, I am sharing your videos they truly are very educational and to the point, thankssssssss. Many blessings
Hi Yvonne. I love the fact that you 'already know this.' You're connected to your truth. Sometimes, we just need to hear it again to hook back into this wisdom. Wishing you well!
Yes Susan my Ego did get bruised 6 weeks ago. I left a voicemail to my friend, and she didn't respond. Like a baby, I lost control and dumped my cologne down the toilet and pouted for a few days. Now Do and I are still dating, and I am loving it!! 😉
Hi Susan,THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH FOR SHARING ALL THESE VIDEOS ..I CAN TELL YOU THAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH UR VIDEOS AND AM SOO GLAD THAT I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO UNDERSTAND MYSELF A LOT MORE BETTER NOW AND AM LOVING YOUR VIDEOS ..KEEP UP THE GOOD JOB👍🙏❤
People have no concept of love in the present world.It is sad to say that it is the most abused word.They want to be loved but they are unaware of what love is.The more they are trying to define the more messed they are.It is a feeling that can be felt but not defined.
Oh this video spoke to me.. I'm in a 4 month relationship with a nice man I had worked with about 5 yrs ago. Since then we both went through rough break ups. He told me that he was/is over his ex and I believe he is about 95% over it but... mixed messages. He is good at returning my texts right away, he makes dates, I've met friends and family, but he has a hard time communicating emotionally, he chats with female friends, and still has her stuff stored in his garage/still on same cellphone plan.. he asked me to move in, yet hasn't been able to say he loves me. I asked him to send the ex a text to make arrangements and he did, telling me that she was already in the process and should be taken care of in a couple of weeks.. leaving 6 days.. when I bring up my feelings and that I sometimes doubt his feelings he looks shocked and says he really likes me.. of course there's more but, I'm wondering if I am in denial and need to move on
I'm sorry, but I really need to ask: why are you moving in with someone you've only known for 4 months? In my very limited life experience, I'd say it takes about a year to intimately know someone (let's just say their darker sides). If he is having a hard time communicating emotionally now, do you think that will be different 1 year from now or even in 2? I'm just playing devil's advocate. I do hope it goes well for you, but 4 months is really a very short time imo.
Hello, Ms. Winter. Can you please give me your opinion on whether you think, in the times we live in, if traditional male and female roles still exist? It just seems like the guys I talk to are getting more and more lazy and want/expect the female to do a majority of the work. I'm not particularly old fashioned, but I would at least like for things to be 50/50
You're correct. Men have ben trained to be lazy. They don't know how to court and rely upon coaches that teach them to play games and make women chase them. There are traditionalists, of course. BTW: when a man really falls for you he knows exactly what to do to win your heart.
@@SusanWinter yes and if he really wants you around I m sure he ll pull his weight rather than want you to be another momma. I hear a lot of guys say they want someone to mind them and take care of them without doing Much of that themselves. Its very old fashioned and back ward thinking, and a mother in the background hoping you ll take over her job, god forbid you d have babies with someone like that, it d be a major mess
So how do you fix your bruised ego towards someone that makes you feel like you love them so you can feel more stable and secure without getting what you want from them? Especially when you’ve been feeling that way for a while? Open to advice from anyone who has an answer or experience ❤️❤️❤️ thank you!!!❤️❤️❤️
What if you know their mission statement and it matches your own? What if everything we both wanted was the same.. in some cases its much more than just a bruised ego.
Thanks for the clarity of my situation I put myself in. Of course I wanted what I couldn't have at the moment when I wanted it. Bruised ego..yes that was me. My thinking was; wonderful me! But a reality check the order of the day. But my almost lady love. Gave the first impression she wanted relationship. Trued out she didn't want what she thought she wanted when she wanted she thought it. I know it's confusing..Such is the nature of relationships today mostly. 😎
It's what happened to me. The woman I am dating now pressed the relationship issue early on in the first few months. I didn't want that as I was juggling multiple woman and enjoyed the bachelor lifestyle. Fast forward to a year later and I asked her to be my girlfriend. At first she said yes but then she said she wants to see if I'm serious first. Its a month since I asked her and still no answer. She said we are dating exclusive and should continue that before going in a relationship.
This is how I feel a lot of the time. When my girlfriend doesn't respond to my text or sends me a good night/good morning text I get so upset and the thoughts that go into my mind. All because of ego.
What really upsets me is when she can go on Facebook first thing in the morning and not even text me until late in the evening. I know this sounds childish but sometimes I wonder.... is this also my ego or her lack of interest.
Daniela González most life coaches will tell you to back off and let them come to you....no contact, make them miss you. Not sure if this is the thing to do.
In my case I admitted my love to my girlfriend. And now she is pulling away. We were almost were planning to marry and the moment I said her i love her. She started asking for space. And that day since I have not seen her. Had clashes on messages. Some good some bad. But she is now cold and untouchable.
Thank you Susan for another amazing video, it´s like you are reading my mind and posting exactly on issues I am dealing with :) It´s been a couple of months since I broke up with someone just under similar circumstances (lots of drama, emotional rollercoaster, emotional unavailability but also....lots of love). Do you think than in this type of relationship, you can simultaneously feel BOTH - your ego AND love? I am trying to adopt this logical perspective you presented in your video (to maybe ease the recovering process and not to put XY on pedestal), but somehow it does not feel right deep down. It was something so strong, so beautiful and I have never experienced this in my life (despite all the hardship). Not that it would help me recover more quickly, but it is somewhat saddening to think that my feelings were only triggered by my ego. Everybody is talking about love and yet, most of us don´t even know what it really means. I have always thought that love is when you feel something very strongly. And the only way for me to feel strongly is to involve drama. Guess some of us need to change our vision of love from the square one :-/
Hi ivka. Yes, love and ego can coexist. You can also love and hate a person at the same time. Please watch some of my breakup videos, especially this one. th-cam.com/video/zxwffqCHiZw/w-d-xo.html The beautiful love you felt was YOUR love. That's the only love we can ever feel. If you still need guidance, please check out my audio booklet. It's powerful. Breakup Triage:The Cure for Heartache www.amazon.com/Breakup-Triage-Cure-Heartache/dp/B01KOTN5AI
I don't know if the rest of your viewers are going to fully buy this idea, but I suppose things get harder to acquire when there's this sense of desperation the field of romance and dating are not exempt. oddly enough, this i have only figured out lately (no shame admitting that) said it once, saying it again: thanks for the bits of info this channel provides. I hope it reaches more folks who need to be more, ehem, 'educated' in this delicate subject. these days I'm observing an awful lot of folks not realizing they're in this idealization phase - which is a lot of times completely wrong, like "9 out of 10" wrong - and label it love
Hi Justin. Love reading your comments. You're correct, there is great misinformation spread about these days. And most people entering dating have no "heroes' to emulate. We eradicated the format to gain freedom. Terrific. BUT, we didn't provide new infrastructure. That's what I feel is needed now. Informed and aware daters who know what they want and pursue their desires ethically and consciously.
I had this chance with him, but because I said "NO" he is going with this other female...he is so romantic, and he gave me that but because I didn't believe my son could handle me going with another man after my husband had died...I didn't NOW I should of left my son, on his own at 39 years now...that was 10 years ago....he is never home and I am alone...and he doesn't seem to care...IMO
Can’t you love them and also not be thrilled with their behavior. I’m not upset. I’m just trying to understand the truth of what it is I am feeling and what is the truth of the situation. I am not feeling reactive. I am not getting all the information from him that I would like to be getting. I am not sure if I have made a mistake and saw something that wasn’t really there or if he just is not ready to move forward.
Often times when someone rejects us or breaks up with us, what really hurts is the rejection itself - not the fact that we've lost that person. In truth, there may not have been anything that special about them, but it's the very fact that somebody doesn't seem to want us anymore - it's a sledgehammer to our ego.
Most people are aware of the pychological phenomena that exists when someone pulls away from us or appears to lose interest, they suddenly appear much more attractive. When they were all over us and messaging us every day, we may not have been that interested in them. We place more value on things when we fear that we might be losing them. We need to be very honest with ourselves when someone walks out of our life: did we genuinely like them as a person, or are we just a bit miffed that they no longer appear to like us?
A sledgehammer to our ego 💥
Fantastic comment! Thank you! 👍💗👍💗👍💗
Nailed it.
You are such a straight talker, yet so gentle.
very well put...you are right about that.
I thought this too.
The root of all suffering is attachment to our desires. Awesome video! It teaches us to stop playing the victim role and acknowledge our self emotional control or lack of it. We can't control anybody except ourselves. People are free beings. We have the power to decide whether to put up with them or walk away.
This video broke my heart because it confirmed that for me it was love but I had to let the person go because you can’t make someone love you back. True love is to want to see the other person happy and be happy for them and realize they were not your person 💔
I had feelings for a person and realized he didn't feel the same way. I listened to the advice of psychics making me believe that he had feelings for me. As a result, I afflicted pain on myself by being involved in a unrequited love situation. Fast forward, I realized the man did not reciprocate and I was doing all the work. I faced reality and decided to take control of myself and let it go of unrequited love. It hurts because I kept thinking about what it could have been. Yet, I realized letting go was the best decision.
Psychics just tell you what you want to hear , and every one you go to will tell you a different thing .. no one knows the future
Don't listen to psychics and tarot readers, majority of them are full of shit and know that if they keep giving you false hope, you'll keep giving them money and clout
I am going through the similar situation with this difference, that i waited till he came clear one night, that he is not in love and never been, was like a cold shower to me.... then he left, saying is over.... sorry to say but still have feelings to him even that he doesn't love me, but think he did best to make me realize the truth, the period now after you have lost someone with who you have hoped for a future is just like a hell... heartbroken pain is incomparable...
Tarot and all makes you so disillusioned you loose sense to reality it’s addictive and just not right wish I never did that
Yes, the think when you spend enough time with a person you care about and they show consistency, kindness, patience and can sometimes take a blind eye to your flaws it may truly be love. I could fantasize about having a life with this person. Some people make better friends too. So important to give it time.
OMG!!!! i should have found this video earlier when i was so depressed of him rejecting and ignoring me. I cried everynight and day and cant move on till now, even i looked for tips over the youtube videos. But after seeing this video, I finally got what i really need to hear to help me moveon. Finally! so, it was just my ego and not what i thought was a real love. Thank you so much Susan. More power to you and to your videos.
Can you tell me what you did? Because I know it's my ego, still i can't seem to move on
but I was stripped of 8 years of hobbies and career and social
I had to go on hikes and hide in my room and practice exercising on my own
There we go, thats what I needed to hear. I am capable of showing and having love, but your absolutely right about the bruised ego. Love is a long slow burn that develops over time.
Terrific response.
@@SusanWinter I have not Been.with Anyone !!° very Tremendously Georgeous Seriously !!! Players
This is probably the smartest thing iv ever heard. Very smart women. Subscribed x
Thank you, -XO!!!!!
This is exactly what I was looking for, I actually don’t love him, he is just an obsession. 🙊
i was thinking about this today and suddenly this video show up in my timeline, this was exactly what i needed
thank you so much
Basic truth. Love is unconditional and I've learned through another person a friend that it feels wonderful, despite pains, yearning included. No bruised ego here. At least not today!
Ligeia D.Aurevilly Wrong.
@Ligeia D'Aurevilly No
Very helpful. So hard to swallow that it's ego. All forms of denial come out that it's really love. Can get confusing at times. Especially if bad behavior is taken personally
My God your intelligent! I ve struggled with this so much lately!
You just saved my life. It was my EGO all along. Thank you sooo much
So far the video's I've seen of yours are amazing; and this is no exception. Obsession is probably as intense as love, but the former is focused narrowly on outcome, where you almost seek to master or conquer the other.
What a fantastic insight, this reaction would never have occurred to me but it makes so much sense. I've recently gone through a breakup & found your channel - You truly are the best 👌
I like the way you dish out your advice! You are like the wise sister we all need!
This video is so perfect - I'm speechless
You are God sent... Amazing person who has really opened my eyes this month i have discovered you. Thanks alot for being there for us...
You are so welcome
I have never heard someone put these seemingly difficult times into such simplistic and realistic terms that resonates with me a hundred percent. I just stumbled on to one of your videos and listened to you for FIVE minutes and am amazed at how easily you could call out a situation for exactly what it is/was. I love it! I think you are a wonderful, passionate and fierce female role model for us all trying to find our way and make sense of the world.
This addressed my current situation dead on. Thanks!!
The more someone tries to get me to 'comply' the more I don't, and go with my intuition.
I think there are situations where both magnanimous love and wounded ego are present, and you have to choose which to honour. I don't think it's always so black and white.
Exactly!
This is awesome and so true. Incredible!!! So helpful. The difference between love and ego.
Like the way you breakdown emotions and behaviour into pieces and explain them. It seems simple. Tnq. Understanding is good. Wonder if relationships can be had with such clinical knowledge. Bruised ego vs. Idea of love - point to ponder.
I’m only 14 and I was able to find this out by myself through a girl but I still know this girl and her teaching me so much abt myself makes me think she’s actually something but idk I’ll jus keep learning
I’m disappointed that my needs aren’t being met, basic needs isnt asking too much. I’ve been disappointed for so long I’ve rationalized putting up with dissatisfaction for far too long
because of the few good things they have done. It’s not love,
It’s denial and obligation.
I know I just found my own personal psychiatrist, Your knowledge and advice helped me out alot now I know what I have to do now, Thank You So Very Much Susan :)
Tamala's Husband, thank you for your thoughtful note!!!! I wish you well.
Your very welcome!! I wish you well also
Wow this was so enlightening
Thanks.
After watching countlessssss videos I finally have an answer. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU Susan!!😉
So funny, I thought that this could help me to detach from the person better, but instead I realised that I truly care about them instead. Damn hahhhaaa 😀😀😀
Love is a special thing. Sometimes the only thing left is just to see the blessing of love...that even in hopeless situation, at least you fell in love, your heart is filled with it and then you let that person go, but *you keep the love!* 💝 Because, is it that person who made me feel love or is it me, who *allowed myself to feel deep love?* It is beautiful thing either way 💘💘💘
Thank you very much, you put some reason into my head. I just found out that my ex is in love, six months after the breakup and I just losted. I was so upset, jealous, hurt and I thought, it means it's love, I'm still in love... no I'm not, I wasn't for six months and I'm not now, now I know why I feel this way and I can deal with this emotions. You really helped me. Wow. Thank you and all the best 😊
I’ve asked myself this but the way you put this has answered my question. I now know.
I wonder how you this with so much clarity...am amazed by your work I love you Susan
What about when a partner intentionally presented a false persona due to insecurity? How can I love the real person if the real person was not presented to me?
Walk away and find someone authentic
Wow this video rlly opened my eyes. What if this annoyed feeling of wanting something you can’t have goes on for a year? Is it possible to not get over the impact rejection had on your ego for over a year? Or is it love?
Thanks beautifully convey, it seams that is a huge misinterpretation about what love is all about, what I have discovered is that love is not an emotion but the essence of what we are, if we don’t love our light then whom will, I am sharing your videos they truly are very educational and to the point, thankssssssss. Many blessings
So utterly true Susan.I keep telling couples in conflict the same. By the by...why the ring in your small finger🤔
such insight you have...thank you so much...í always seem to hear from you what í already know and when í need it most....
Hi Yvonne. I love the fact that you 'already know this.' You're connected to your truth. Sometimes, we just need to hear it again to hook back into this wisdom. Wishing you well!
Susan Winter thank you for taking the time to answer...take care...keep them coming💕
Yes Susan my Ego did get bruised 6 weeks ago. I left a voicemail to my friend, and she didn't respond.
Like a baby, I lost control and dumped my cologne down the toilet and pouted for a few days.
Now Do and I are still dating, and I am loving it!! 😉
Hi Susan,THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH FOR SHARING ALL THESE VIDEOS ..I CAN TELL YOU THAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH UR VIDEOS AND AM SOO GLAD THAT I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO UNDERSTAND MYSELF A LOT MORE BETTER NOW AND AM LOVING YOUR VIDEOS ..KEEP UP THE GOOD JOB👍🙏❤
People have no concept of love in the present world.It is sad to say that it is the most abused word.They want to be loved but they are unaware of what love is.The more they are trying to define the more messed they are.It is a feeling that can be felt but not defined.
"Chances are it's not love it's a bruised ego."
"Oh, thanks. I love you."
Love is patient. Love is not selfish. Love understands ❤️
Oh this video spoke to me.. I'm in a 4 month relationship with a nice man I had worked with about 5 yrs ago. Since then we both went through rough break ups. He told me that he was/is over his ex and I believe he is about 95% over it but... mixed messages. He is good at returning my texts right away, he makes dates, I've met friends and family, but he has a hard time communicating emotionally, he chats with female friends, and still has her stuff stored in his garage/still on same cellphone plan.. he asked me to move in, yet hasn't been able to say he loves me. I asked him to send the ex a text to make arrangements and he did, telling me that she was already in the process and should be taken care of in a couple of weeks.. leaving 6 days.. when I bring up my feelings and that I sometimes doubt his feelings he looks shocked and says he really likes me.. of course there's more but, I'm wondering if I am in denial and need to move on
I'm sorry, but I really need to ask: why are you moving in with someone you've only known for 4 months? In my very limited life experience, I'd say it takes about a year to intimately know someone (let's just say their darker sides). If he is having a hard time communicating emotionally now, do you think that will be different 1 year from now or even in 2? I'm just playing devil's advocate. I do hope it goes well for you, but 4 months is really a very short time imo.
Very true, I feel as if you made this video for me, thank you so much for your help Susan your great!!!
Daniel, I appreciate this. How kind of you to write. Wishing you well.
Susan you're simply the best , all that you said made perfect sense ,
Peter Britto thanks'
I’m going through this right now! This video has helped me a lot!
This was really helpful. Thank you so much. Your videos are great.
You are so smart
This is incredibly helpful. Thank you very much!
Thanks a lot for all the knowledge 😀🤗🙏 Found this very helpful...
Awesome! can hardly believe this! you're really good Susan.
Totally get what you’ve said. I’ve seen that so many times.
What about someone you’ve had on and off feelings with for 13 years?
Very insightful! Thank you!
you are wise
This woman is amazing
I love this! Thank you 😄👏
Wow! You really are amazing!
You are the best Susan!God bless
I needed this tbh
Thank you for this video!
Just want peace, no matter how it looks.
Golden words. Thanks so much.
This is great!
Simply wow !! Thank you !
I really really like your videos. Thank you so much!
Rubin Bajwa thank you!! I appreciate that.
You don't love them , you're just hurt they rejected you ...
100%
How do you know it's love then?
Another brilliant video.
O my goodness this is so correct, thank you. Brused ego, sounds very childish Iv got this🤗
I needed to hear this.
Where was this video 5 years ago
Hello, Ms. Winter. Can you please give me your opinion on whether you think, in the times we live in, if traditional male and female roles still exist? It just seems like the guys I talk to are getting more and more lazy and want/expect the female to do a majority of the work. I'm not particularly old fashioned, but I would at least like for things to be 50/50
You're correct. Men have ben trained to be lazy. They don't know how to court and rely upon coaches that teach them to play games and make women chase them. There are traditionalists, of course. BTW: when a man really falls for you he knows exactly what to do to win your heart.
@@SusanWinter yes and if he really wants you around I m sure he ll pull his weight rather than want you to be another momma. I hear a lot of guys say they want someone to mind them and take care of them without doing Much of that themselves. Its very old fashioned and back ward thinking, and a mother in the background hoping you ll take over her job, god forbid you d have babies with someone like that, it d be a major mess
So how do you fix your bruised ego towards someone that makes you feel like you love them so you can feel more stable and secure without getting what you want from them? Especially when you’ve been feeling that way for a while? Open to advice from anyone who has an answer or experience ❤️❤️❤️ thank you!!!❤️❤️❤️
Find a new better man
Relationships are very complicated. Want to give up and say not worth it.
Yup. I'm still going over what happened with an ex 12 years ago. I have been single since then. Its too painful.
What if you know their mission statement and it matches your own? What if everything we both wanted was the same.. in some cases its much more than just a bruised ego.
What if is what if is not present 😊
@@teriballa6282 sorry could you clarify please
I mean "what if " is not reality is imagination .
Thanks for the clarity of my situation I put myself in. Of course I wanted what I couldn't have at the moment when I wanted it. Bruised ego..yes that was me. My thinking was; wonderful me! But a reality check the order of the day. But my almost lady love. Gave the first impression she wanted relationship. Trued out she didn't want what she thought she wanted when she wanted she thought it. I know it's confusing..Such is the nature of relationships today mostly. 😎
It's what happened to me. The woman I am dating now pressed the relationship issue early on in the first few months. I didn't want that as I was juggling multiple woman and enjoyed the bachelor lifestyle. Fast forward to a year later and I asked her to be my girlfriend. At first she said yes but then she said she wants to see if I'm serious first. Its a month since I asked her and still no answer. She said we are dating exclusive and should continue that before going in a relationship.
So Wise 🙏
This is how I feel a lot of the time. When my girlfriend doesn't respond to my text or sends me a good night/good morning text I get so upset and the thoughts that go into my mind. All because of ego.
lvs lvs me to with the guy i like the same
What really upsets me is when she can go on Facebook first thing in the morning and not even text me until late in the evening. I know this sounds childish but sometimes I wonder.... is this also my ego or her lack of interest.
The same with this guy!!!!! Also he post things on Facebook and ignore me.
I think is not an ego think is a lack of interest as you say
Daniela González most life coaches will tell you to back off and let them come to you....no contact, make them miss you. Not sure if this is the thing to do.
Doesn’t matter, all love is conditional...duty is the criminally underrated love.
In my case I admitted my love to my girlfriend. And now she is pulling away. We were almost were planning to marry and the moment I said her i love her. She started asking for space. And that day since I have not seen her. Had clashes on messages. Some good some bad. But she is now cold and untouchable.
Exactly it’s more my ego that’s bruised, don’t love her anymore
Thank you 🙏🏾
Good point.
Used to not having what I can't have its not that its something else!
Thank you Susan for another amazing video, it´s like you are reading my mind and posting exactly on issues I am dealing with :) It´s been a couple of months since I broke up with someone just under similar circumstances (lots of drama, emotional rollercoaster, emotional unavailability but also....lots of love). Do you think than in this type of relationship, you can simultaneously feel BOTH - your ego AND love? I am trying to adopt this logical perspective you presented in your video (to maybe ease the recovering process and not to put XY on pedestal), but somehow it does not feel right deep down. It was something so strong, so beautiful and I have never experienced this in my life (despite all the hardship). Not that it would help me recover more quickly, but it is somewhat saddening to think that my feelings were only triggered by my ego. Everybody is talking about love and yet, most of us don´t even know what it really means. I have always thought that love is when you feel something very strongly. And the only way for me to feel strongly is to involve drama. Guess some of us need to change our vision of love from the square one :-/
Hi ivka. Yes, love and ego can coexist. You can also love and hate a person at the same time. Please watch some of my breakup videos, especially this one.
th-cam.com/video/zxwffqCHiZw/w-d-xo.html The beautiful love you felt was YOUR love. That's the only love we can ever feel. If you still need guidance, please check out my audio booklet. It's powerful. Breakup Triage:The Cure for Heartache
www.amazon.com/Breakup-Triage-Cure-Heartache/dp/B01KOTN5AI
What is love?
I don't know if the rest of your viewers are going to fully buy this idea, but I suppose things get harder to acquire when there's this sense of desperation
the field of romance and dating are not exempt. oddly enough, this i have only figured out lately (no shame admitting that)
said it once, saying it again: thanks for the bits of info this channel provides. I hope it reaches more folks who need to be more, ehem, 'educated' in this delicate subject. these days I'm observing an awful lot of folks not realizing they're in this idealization phase - which is a lot of times completely wrong, like "9 out of 10" wrong - and label it love
Hi Justin. Love reading your comments. You're correct, there is great misinformation spread about these days. And most people entering dating have no "heroes' to emulate. We eradicated the format to gain freedom. Terrific. BUT, we didn't provide new infrastructure. That's what I feel is needed now. Informed and aware daters who know what they want and pursue their desires ethically and consciously.
so love is beyond our choices nd ego
This is so true
Why plp always want someone spouse?
I had this chance with him, but because I said "NO" he is going with this other female...he is so romantic, and he gave me that but because I didn't believe my son could handle me going with another man after my husband had died...I didn't NOW I should of left my son, on his own at 39 years now...that was 10 years ago....he is never home and I am alone...and he doesn't seem to care...IMO
Thanks Susan 👌🏻
You're welcome, Reggie.
Can’t you love them and also not be thrilled with their behavior. I’m not upset. I’m just trying to understand the truth of what it is I am feeling and what is the truth of the situation. I am not feeling reactive. I am not getting all the information from him that I would like to be getting. I am not sure if I have made a mistake and saw something that wasn’t really there or if he just is not ready to move forward.
Talk about hitting the nail on the head to drive it home. An impressive video. We all go through this.
There's something!
It’s all so complicated
Yeahhhhh 😉
Thats all I wanted to know but now Im sure Im in love 😏Thank youuuuu