My mother is a hoarder. 2yrs ago I convinced her to let me clean out her garage. When I began I couldn’t even open the wall through door all the way. Stuff was piled 6’-8’ high. Because the door also didn’t close properly there had been wild animals living (and dying) in the garage for years. I found dozens of rat skeletons, several opossum remains, raccoon, a coyote skeleton and even the cat my mom had lost 3yrs prior! It took me 10weeks but I got it completely cleaned, disinfected and doors in working order. Now I just need to convince her to let me into her house. It’s a long sad and frustrating process but I know she can’t help her compulsion to hoard.
Sometimes the people closest to the person that is having issues with hoarding are more judgemental than caring, hoarding is a symptom, it does not make the person bad. Hoarding is something that starts on the inside, the person struggling with hoarding is struggling, they are aware of the problem even though they may still be in denial. Being a hoarder comes with shame, stress, feelings of being overwhelmed and hopelessness because they do not know how or where to start.
You can not really help when she is in denial.. my mom is the same. Only thing i can think of is being respectful towards her belongings but maybe convince her day by day to throw away one obviously unnecessary item.. then she can relearn her self efficiency.
Know the feeling. Can't even pick up year old advertisement off the floor without her throwing a fit. The best you can do is organize it without throwing it away. Like if they are saving to 'recycle' follow up with it. Just start off real small like actual food waste or have her sort out papers even if it doesn't go to the trash. There are reddit that feature both people helping hoarders along with hoarders trying to get their life together.
I hope you will decide to rehome your plants to a manageable level that will alleviate the anxiety level & that will help manage your depression in a better way. ❤❤
Hi Cory, I've watched some of your shows and sure appreciate your efforts, you have a great manner about you and in some cases even better than the professional trained therapists with the big degrees by their name. Sometimes just the fact that you shed tears shows the deepness of your concern. My brother is a hoarder but thankfully for now it is just storages although I have tried over and over to get him to downsize. It will be painful when the money ends and he has to give up his treasures. That day will come and I dread it. I'll look at more and get more insight, again appreciate all you do...!! Wendy Martin, Apple Valley, CA
Thanks Wendy! This takes a special approach, compassion and understanding. I love what I do. Changing lives is a pretty amazing feeling. I hope your brother will seek help! We are always happy to talk to him if he needs help with direction.
I wonder what people who don't live in prosperous places do with the same kind of trauma since acquisition isnt an option. How else does this kind of tendency manifest?
Oh believe me, these type of folks do have a remarkable ability to acquire stuff...I have plenty of next door neighbors on either side that were/ are hoarders.
I wish I could afford this... I got an estimate from Steri-Clean in my town, and it is $10K for 1000 sq feet. I was put on activity restriction as soon as I moved for medical issues and didn't get a chance to unpack-so I had no winter coat when the seasons changed, and have had many medical dietary restrictions, so have had to get rid of and replace groceries several times. I don't want this stuff. I don't normally live like this. There are no biohazards. I was a RN for 35 yrs, and taught OSHA biohazard stuff to nursing home employees in Texas. I have no family here. I don't have friends in this area who could help. I want the stuff gone- and don't care where it ends up. I take out my trash, have a sharps container for insulin pen needles, and when I can get around (disabled for 20 yrs, so sporadic), I am the Lysol queen... but I'm way in over my head, and help isn't affordable. I just want to get in my car and drive until my tank is empty, and start over from there with my dog (and she uses pee pads that are picked up daily).
I have a friend I can no longer tolerate being around. She literally stinks. I've offered to help her but she refuses. I feel for her dogs. I'm on the verge of calling the health department. What else can I do?
Tell her maybe in the most sensitive way possible.. maybe something like it smells strange in here.. just not pointing out its her. When you do this several times maybe she will get the insight 😂
Please call the health department! You are the only one who is in a position to be an advocate for those dogs. Be aware your friend is going to get angry & become defensive towards you. Learn to shake it off & not feel guilty.
I see what you mean however It effects other people also. No family members can visit or stay over and it’s hard knowing that your loved one is putting themselves in danger and stressful and who else is going to clean the items? It losses quality of life. Understanding is for both ways 🕊
You can help yourself! Throw one thing away every day. Don’t bring new things in the house. If its an emptional item, take a foto of it. Get stuff out the house immediately after sorting it out, so you can not go back. Tiny steps are going to give you your strength back and you are going to notice that you CAN actually do things!
Hi Jared, think of this Chinese proverb:" A journey of a thousand miles start's with one step" & " A man who removes a mountain start's by removing small stone's"
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My mother is a hoarder. 2yrs ago I convinced her to let me clean out her garage. When I began I couldn’t even open the wall through door all the way. Stuff was piled 6’-8’ high. Because the door also didn’t close properly there had been wild animals living (and dying) in the garage for years. I found dozens of rat skeletons, several opossum remains, raccoon, a coyote skeleton and even the cat my mom had lost 3yrs prior! It took me 10weeks but I got it completely cleaned, disinfected and doors in working order. Now I just need to convince her to let me into her house. It’s a long sad and frustrating process but I know she can’t help her compulsion to hoard.
You are an exceptionally understanding person.
That's crazy. The strength to clean
Sometimes the people closest to the person that is having issues with hoarding are more judgemental than caring, hoarding is a symptom, it does not make the person bad. Hoarding is something that starts on the inside, the person struggling with hoarding is struggling, they are aware of the problem even though they may still be in denial. Being a hoarder comes with shame, stress, feelings of being overwhelmed and hopelessness because they do not know how or where to start.
It sounds like you know exactly how I feel
Sometimes the people living with the hoarder are the ones who suffer the most.
Who can I call to help my mother in law, she's a hoarder and she's in severe denial.
its sad how 10 months later and there is still no answer. this world is braindead.
@@cyanbrandohs1080 By starting small, perhaps with you encouraging her, to take the step of sorting out a draw.
You can not really help when she is in denial.. my mom is the same. Only thing i can think of is being respectful towards her belongings but maybe convince her day by day to throw away one obviously unnecessary item.. then she can relearn her self efficiency.
Know the feeling. Can't even pick up year old advertisement off the floor without her throwing a fit. The best you can do is organize it without throwing it away. Like if they are saving to 'recycle' follow up with it. Just start off real small like actual food waste or have her sort out papers even if it doesn't go to the trash. There are reddit that feature both people helping hoarders along with hoarders trying to get their life together.
Mental health providers
I’ve become a plant hoarder, it helps fight my depression but now it’s just another cause of anxiety. 😢
I hope you will decide to rehome your plants to a manageable level that will alleviate the anxiety level & that will help manage your depression in a better way. ❤❤
Hi Cory, I've watched some of your shows and sure appreciate your efforts, you have a great manner about you and in some cases even better than the professional trained therapists with the big degrees by their name. Sometimes just the fact that you shed tears shows the deepness of your concern. My brother is a hoarder but thankfully for now it is just storages although I have tried over and over to get him to downsize. It will be painful when the money ends and he has to give up his treasures. That day will come and I dread it. I'll look at more and get more insight, again appreciate all you do...!! Wendy Martin, Apple Valley, CA
Thanks Wendy! This takes a special approach, compassion and understanding. I love what I do. Changing lives is a pretty amazing feeling. I hope your brother will seek help! We are always happy to talk to him if he needs help with direction.
I wonder what people who don't live in prosperous places do with the same kind of trauma since acquisition isnt an option. How else does this kind of tendency manifest?
I would love to know the answer to that question as well
Probably not at all..
Its even worse. Because they hoard trash from another people, rubish from the streets, whatever they pick up
They still acquire stuff that fills their house - garbage, bottles, plastic things, plants, rocks, animals like stray cats and dogs
Oh believe me, these type of folks do have a remarkable ability to acquire stuff...I have plenty of next door neighbors on either side that were/ are hoarders.
I don't know where to ask for help. But I'm in great need.
A local church. Either speak with a pastor or leave notes at different churches.
Don’t give up until you get help is what works 🕊
You made the first step here now take the second and then the third. Keep the momentum 😘🤗🥰
I meant notes/advertisement for assistance on community boards if they have them 🙏🏻
@@taniadenise5145 if I can get past the shame of it all. That would be alot of ppl seeing my shame. Thank you
Right smh me
I wish I could afford this... I got an estimate from Steri-Clean in my town, and it is $10K for 1000 sq feet. I was put on activity restriction as soon as I moved for medical issues and didn't get a chance to unpack-so I had no winter coat when the seasons changed, and have had many medical dietary restrictions, so have had to get rid of and replace groceries several times. I don't want this stuff. I don't normally live like this. There are no biohazards. I was a RN for 35 yrs, and taught OSHA biohazard stuff to nursing home employees in Texas. I have no family here. I don't have friends in this area who could help. I want the stuff gone- and don't care where it ends up. I take out my trash, have a sharps container for insulin pen needles, and when I can get around (disabled for 20 yrs, so sporadic), I am the Lysol queen... but I'm way in over my head, and help isn't affordable. I just want to get in my car and drive until my tank is empty, and start over from there with my dog (and she uses pee pads that are picked up daily).
We had a fatal fire in our small town years ago. The person who perished couldn't get out of the house because the exits were blocked with possessions
I have a friend I can no longer tolerate being around. She literally stinks. I've offered to help her but she refuses. I feel for her dogs. I'm on the verge of calling the health department. What else can I do?
Tell her maybe in the most sensitive way possible.. maybe something like it smells strange in here.. just not pointing out its her. When you do this several times maybe she will get the insight 😂
Please call the health department! You are the only one who is in a position to be an advocate for those dogs. Be aware your friend is going to get angry & become defensive towards you. Learn to shake it off & not feel guilty.
My auntie is a hoarder shes gonna bury herself alive if she doesnt change
Personally, I think the question in the beginning is totally worthless.
I see what you mean however It effects other people also. No family members can visit or stay over and it’s hard knowing that your loved one is putting themselves in danger and stressful and who else is going to clean the items?
It losses quality of life.
Understanding is for both ways 🕊
I need help!
You can help yourself! Throw one thing away every day. Don’t bring new things in the house. If its an emptional item, take a foto of it. Get stuff out the house immediately after sorting it out, so you can not go back. Tiny steps are going to give you your strength back and you are going to notice that you CAN actually do things!
Hi Jared, think of this Chinese proverb:" A journey of a thousand miles start's with one step" & " A man who removes a mountain start's by removing small stone's"
Hoarders is pretty much the only reality show I somewhat believe in
😂