You know the truth. You know what you have to do. The battle between emotions and commonsense is the hardest battle you’ll fight. Trauma bonds are created by fake people with no reality. Meaning they do not love you and cannot provide what you need.
I lost my husband 5 years ago not by separation but because he died of cancer. I'm stuck in grief and memories and find it hard to let go. Thank you for the video. It offers a way to deal with the pain and slowly but surely find a way to accept the present time and continue on my own.
I understand your pain. I hope you are ok, extremely difficult. I lost my husband 10 years ago, I still attached, stuck and find it difficult to move on….
Reason why a passing hurts; 1.) Timing of their passing 2.) Their passing was sudden even if it was a slow decline. 3.) It never made sense to begin with, the loss was sudden and unexpected. 4.) Your life with that person was and is still raw. 5.) You were attached to this person, they added real, tested and measured value. Move Forward; 1.) Is accept it as an event 2.) Learn that this loss is a lesson. 3.) It was their time to leave. 4.) their struggles in life are now released. 5.) File those good memories, when situation or timing presents itself. 6.) Keep focusing on that mission or goal. 7.) Remember they are in a better place, no pain, no suffering and no discomfort. 8.) His or Her death is part of your overall story not the story. 9.) Forgiveness is about releasing emotional chains.. 10.) Remember people you meet outside of your circumstances don’t need to hear, speak or relive the memories. Build new memories with them.
I ended a two year relationship about four months ago. I truly did love her but she was exhausting. Despite talking things through regularly, nothing changed and I was drained. I miss her and think about her every day but know it was the right decision. What’s so difficult is that we did so much together. Cafes, restaurants, walks, weekends away, museums etc and all and around London. Whenever I go out now I can either go to the same places and end up reminiscing or actively avoid them which ends up reminding me too. I literally can’t see myself dating again right now. Wow this has been tough. I keep saying “it’s over and time to move on” in my head but still parts of me think that maybe I made a mistake ending it. It’s still fresh I guess. Hopefully by next spring things will be good again. Sigh
I hear this. I’m six months out of something that felt exactly like what you’re describing. You can move past this, and trust that your gut chose this for you because it was right 🙂. Trust.
You are the only one who can help yourself. If this is the right decision, don’t regret. Have some time to rest and move on to your next new chapter.. :)
We just broke up yesterday after a tumultuous year and a half. I know I need to let go and move on. I’m glad I found this video. It’s hard to listen to, but it’s going to help if I save it and listen to it again and again.
I'm now 51 & I no longer hold onto nonsense 🙏 I can feel the shift it's a revelation i shall become the man my late mother expected me to be, finding a decent lady is no longer a priority my wee 5yo boy is along with my dreams in finding peace at long last 🙏
Finding it extremely difficult to let go of false hope. Even started going websites figuring out how to get her to fall in love with me again. Sent her a text to try and spark some emotions in her. But im realising doing this is keeping me stuck. I need to let it go but its very hard at the moment
This person left me when I was in the middle of grieving the loss of a parent. I have dealt with this over the course of 12 years and feel like I still can’t move forward even though they have moved on into another relationship I’m stuck. We have had communication over the years but it was only on their term! I have blocked but I keep thinking back to then! I want to move forward! I accept what is and want no memories of it I need to recognize the lesson and keep going ❗️
my soon to be ex wife was the love of my life. She had a life changing accident. As a non drug user and non drinker she tried a gummy that caused her to have a psychotic break. Now she believes I tried to murder her and assassinate her character and ruin her life. She LITERALLY believes I'm the devil. She has moved out and is refusing medical help. She only wants a divorce. says "it's her dream." She has specifically told me not to contact her ever again and she prays that she neither means anything for me nor wants to see me. It's a nightmare come true.....
In these types of teachings there’s something I’m having difficulty understanding. They talk of detaching from the desire to control outcomes but at the same time having the power to shape our own story. To me, these things seem to oppose one another. I’d appreciate it if someone could help bridge the disconnect I’m having here.
My fiancé (7 year relationship) broke up with me 4 months ago and we've been slowly re-establishing a friendship which I misinterpreted as reconciliation. Last night she came to my place for dinner and confessed that she has been having an affair with a married man. The weight is unbearable and if I hold on any longer I will not make it.
You don’t want a woman that can have an affair! Take it as a big blessing, she wants to stay friends just to keep you there! Don’t put yourself in that situation and go full no contact for at least a month then see how you feel, your allowing her access to the benefits without the commitment just on off chance she might want you back, plz do give her that option
Well she is telling me she never cheated and she was just talking and nothing happened. I’m trying to believe that so I can function but I don’t know for sure. We are still talking. She is still making it clear she has no feelings and we are just friends but she has been texting me every day which makes no sense.
@ you have to go full on no contact, it’s the only way to build yourself back up and if she wants you after (she probably will) you will be in a more confident place, people only want to stay friends to keep you hanging on, if she knows your always there she doesn’t need to change!
@@gemmaburns6407 I want to but my worst fear has basically come true. When I went no contact she was talking to this guy. Before no contact we barely spoke then after she started texting me every day and we've been hanging out. Im afraid if I go no contact again she will hook up with someone and I can never take her back after that.
I met my Soulmate online, it was over before it began and he never gave me closure. That's been the hardest thing, I kept hoping he would return but that didn't happen 💔 I wish we never connected but I have severed any route of communication. It's been 6 months and I refuse to go back to that toxicity 💯
All relationships have an expiration date, sadly, but when we were young we were led to believe that our feelings of love would last forever. The world we live in is such that just about everywhere we turn there’s another hot beauty or alpha male that piques our interest so we put him or her on a pedestal. It’s human nature to experience the sweet hellos and bitter goodbyes with different actors. Nature doesn’t care so long as we keep procreating. We are just meant to procreate as far as nature is concerned. If we get hurt in the process too bad. Nature has still won… Nothing wrong with being celibate and enjoying platonic relationships…
I feel like we never had the chance to try and actually work on our problems. I so badly want to put my family back together, but he wants to start new. I feel unworthy of a 2nd chance. I'm heart broken and the pain feels like it's never going to end. I have emotional trauma and know it's time to work on myself.
The thing is how do you release yourself from the past when you have children ? It’s super hard and no one really tells you how to do that . I mean I guess it’s the same thing but it’s fucking harder .
I'm sorry. Similar situation, only it's been 6 months for me. I conclude that if he really wanted me, he wouldn't put himself in a position to lose me. I hope that you, too, can understand your worth. These people didn't deserve our love in 1st place. Peace and blessings to you 🙏🏼✨️
My wife told me this week she wants to leave because she found happiness in another man and that kills me I'm still internationally fighting for our marriage we've been together for 9 years and i just feel like im not a man for not being able to keep my family together
@danielrosales420 it kills man i dont know how to find my way through this darkness and evil thats been thrown in my lap and i dont know if i should take her back if one day she comes around if you have advice id listen
Its hard, my gf left when i was grieving my 14 year old dog passing over, my friend had drowned 4 months earlier...she totally blindsided me. She never asks how i am, she is just cold & callous with no accountability on her part. Very hard to move on but I'm trying every day.😢
We confuse parents with partners so that trauma bond often has more to do with who we thought we loved & the idea that they once represented 💔❤️🩹♥️ completion never comes from a relationship & whatever gets projected you isn’t your stuff but his to own. You’re enough as you are & now you’re in a state of perfection on your way to authenticity
I was fooled by an x and an ex friend… worst thing… the new gf works with me and is picked up by the ex in my workplace… how is that easy to move on from?
@@LakeHouse1965 yeah but she lives an hour away and they aren’t always available to make that drive for me so I have to deal with the anxiety and go up there still. We’re still cordial with one another but I’m having such a hard time letting go. I can texting her about the baby is too much for me.
I never even got a chance with my soulmate my wife of 13 years cheated and I found an old coworker and realized she made a ton of unrequited love songs about me I fell very hard she wont talk to me about it but she also won’t close the book on us
Comment to Infinite Wisdom oracle people. This is a great video but DEAR GOD EVERY 2 MINUTES AN INTRUSIVE AD! It's just terrible. This is one of the only you tube video stations I watch that has this many intrusive ads. It's awful. I stuck with it because the content is good but I will not subscibe to this channel because of the ad issue. Really offensive.
Emotionally detach ka kisi ke bolne kehne se ya video dekh ke hota hai koi ... Or hme detachment mt dikhao khud se detach ho chuke hain... Ab attachment bhi sirf apne aap se hi chahte hain waps.
I am trauma bound, and having a hard time letting go. I wanted us to work, but I am worth more than what he valued me at.
Wish you lots of strength for the healing and recovery. You are not alone , I live the same right now.
Me too my friend, my wife abruptly left me without clear reason..@agotaczene4063
Same here I’m pushing thru
Yup 😢
You know the truth. You know what you have to do. The battle between emotions and commonsense is the hardest battle you’ll fight. Trauma bonds are created by fake people with no reality. Meaning they do not love you and cannot provide what you need.
It is not about
‘moving on’ …
It’s about moving forward with the wisdom gained from the experiences.
“Cannot grow new fruit if you’re holding onto old branches.”
Perfect statement
I acknowledge that this chapter is over, now it's time to move on...I needed to hear this today ❤
It helped hearing practice forgiving , forgiving yourself . I beat the shit out of myself all the time
❤
I hope whomever is planned for you is more than enough for you. Blessings
@@djignoremusic2297I'm sure you did your best. We all have weak moments.
I lost my husband 5 years ago not by separation but because he died of cancer. I'm stuck in grief and memories and find it hard to let go.
Thank you for the video. It offers a way to deal with the pain and slowly but surely find a way to accept the present time and continue on my own.
Love to you 🙏💫✨
Awe Christine, I wish you peace and hope you can let go. Lots of love my friend ❤
I understand your pain. I hope you are ok, extremely difficult. I lost my husband 10 years ago, I still attached, stuck and find it difficult to move on….
Be so so glad you had that kind of love ❤️ that's precious and you deserve more give yourself love and care 💗😘💗 He would want your happiness
Reason why a passing hurts;
1.) Timing of their passing
2.) Their passing was sudden even if it was a slow decline.
3.) It never made sense to begin with, the loss was sudden and unexpected.
4.) Your life with that person was and is still raw.
5.) You were attached to this person, they added real, tested and measured value.
Move Forward;
1.) Is accept it as an event
2.) Learn that this loss is a lesson.
3.) It was their time to leave.
4.) their struggles in life are now released.
5.) File those good memories, when situation or timing presents itself.
6.) Keep focusing on that mission or goal.
7.) Remember they are in a better place, no pain, no suffering and no discomfort.
8.) His or Her death is part of your overall story not the story.
9.) Forgiveness is about releasing emotional chains..
10.) Remember people you meet outside of your circumstances don’t need to hear, speak or relive the memories. Build new memories with them.
This was very helpful, I am in therapy and I am 4 years out and still healing.
I ended a two year relationship about four months ago. I truly did love her but she was exhausting. Despite talking things through regularly, nothing changed and I was drained. I miss her and think about her every day but know it was the right decision. What’s so difficult is that we did so much together. Cafes, restaurants, walks, weekends away, museums etc and all and around London. Whenever I go out now I can either go to the same places and end up reminiscing or actively avoid them which ends up reminding me too.
I literally can’t see myself dating again right now. Wow this has been tough.
I keep saying “it’s over and time to move on” in my head but still parts of me think that maybe I made a mistake ending it.
It’s still fresh I guess. Hopefully by next spring things will be good again. Sigh
I hear this. I’m six months out of something that felt exactly like what you’re describing. You can move past this, and trust that your gut chose this for you because it was right 🙂. Trust.
I get it. I'm stuck also. But, it will be better.
I can relate
I can relate
You are the only one who can help yourself. If this is the right decision, don’t regret. Have some time to rest and move on to your next new chapter.. :)
I accept that this chapter is over and I'm ready to move forward
We just broke up yesterday after a tumultuous year and a half. I know I need to let go and move on. I’m glad I found this video. It’s hard to listen to, but it’s going to help if I save it and listen to it again and again.
If it’s been a struggle for that long it was not meant to be. Or it is a lesson you need to look out for in your future.
Thanks for boosting my morale , i recently broke up and am struggling to forget the past but ur video gave me a thought a good one
I am holding on to something that is dead and gone and it is time to let go
Me too. Let’s hope the pain will dissipate soon.
Harvest that crystallized pain & it transforms ✨
@@Foxie635it’s sooo darn hard, but we will get there….
Me too
@@Foxie635 seems to be getting better with no contact and full attention on the present 😉💯❤️❤️❤️
Good reading, it’s so much pain-full to let go the relationship , separation is not just acceptance but it’s like collection of broken pieces .
I'm now 51 & I no longer hold onto nonsense 🙏 I can feel the shift it's a revelation i shall become the man my late mother expected me to be, finding a decent lady is no longer a priority my wee 5yo boy is along with my dreams in finding peace at long last 🙏
Thanks!
Finding it extremely difficult to let go of false hope. Even started going websites figuring out how to get her to fall in love with me again. Sent her a text to try and spark some emotions in her. But im realising doing this is keeping me stuck. I need to let it go but its very hard at the moment
It's clear my daughter and I deserve better. The constant betrayal, physical and emotional, has taken us to a place of isolation and hopelessness.
Its clear your daughter deserves better.
Thanks
So much wisdom...will send to my son who's struggling..thank you.
🙏♥️
I did the best I could with the emotional capacity I had at the time❤
Thank you for this, very relevant to my 😊
Thank you so much ❤
Friendships that are toxic can lead to the need to detach and can sometimes hurt more than some past relationships ending.
I love this!!!! Thank You
This has been beyond helpful, thank you.
Helpful video thank you.🕊
Thank you! Things I definitely needed to hear, this has been quite the struggle. 😢
I needed to hear this.. 😞
I will watch this again, I am still in pain.
This person left me when I was in the middle of grieving the loss of a parent. I have dealt with this over the course of 12 years and feel like I still can’t move forward even though they have moved on into another relationship I’m stuck. We have had communication over the years but it was only on their term! I have blocked but I keep thinking back to then! I want to move forward! I accept what is and want no memories of it I need to recognize the lesson and keep going ❗️
Move on !!!!!!
You're still looking in the mirror
@@strongwoman2668 trying! I know it’s a must easier said than done. Ended contact moving on so far .
Research anxious attachment in attachment theory.
tough to move on when overall things were pretty good, but the bad was too much and not getting better.
This was wonderful ❤
Thank you for this video!
Thank you
Thank you 😢❤
Thank you!
Thank you ❤
I'm stuck in the past please God help me move forward and forgive them and I
32:36
20:00
my soon to be ex wife was the love of my life. She had a life changing accident. As a non drug user and non drinker she tried a gummy that caused her to have a psychotic break. Now she believes I tried to murder her and assassinate her character and ruin her life. She LITERALLY believes I'm the devil. She has moved out and is refusing medical help. She only wants a divorce. says "it's her dream." She has specifically told me not to contact her ever again and she prays that she neither means anything for me nor wants to see me. It's a nightmare come true.....
In these types of teachings there’s something I’m having difficulty understanding. They talk of detaching from the desire to control outcomes but at the same time having the power to shape our own story. To me, these things seem to oppose one another. I’d appreciate it if someone could help bridge the disconnect I’m having here.
My fiancé (7 year relationship) broke up with me 4 months ago and we've been slowly re-establishing a friendship which I misinterpreted as reconciliation. Last night she came to my place for dinner and confessed that she has been having an affair with a married man. The weight is unbearable and if I hold on any longer I will not make it.
They did not have to tell you that. They did that soley to hurt you and push you away. Heal yourself. You will be fine...
You don’t want a woman that can have an affair! Take it as a big blessing, she wants to stay friends just to keep you there! Don’t put yourself in that situation and go full no contact for at least a month then see how you feel, your allowing her access to the benefits without the commitment just on off chance she might want you back, plz do give her that option
Well she is telling me she never cheated and she was just talking and nothing happened. I’m trying to believe that so I can function but I don’t know for sure. We are still talking. She is still making it clear she has no feelings and we are just friends but she has been texting me every day which makes no sense.
@ you have to go full on no contact, it’s the only way to build yourself back up and if she wants you after (she probably will) you will be in a more confident place, people only want to stay friends to keep you hanging on, if she knows your always there she doesn’t need to change!
@@gemmaburns6407 I want to but my worst fear has basically come true. When I went no contact she was talking to this guy. Before no contact we barely spoke then after she started texting me every day and we've been hanging out. Im afraid if I go no contact again she will hook up with someone and I can never take her back after that.
I met my Soulmate online, it was over before it began and he never gave me closure. That's been the hardest thing, I kept hoping he would return but that didn't happen 💔 I wish we never connected but I have severed any route of communication. It's been 6 months and I refuse to go back to that toxicity 💯
All relationships have an expiration date, sadly, but when we were young we were led to believe that our feelings of love would last forever. The world we live in is such that just about everywhere we turn there’s another hot beauty or alpha male that piques our interest so we put him or her on a pedestal. It’s human nature to experience the sweet hellos and bitter goodbyes with different actors. Nature doesn’t care so long as we keep procreating. We are just meant to procreate as far as nature is concerned. If we get hurt in the process too bad. Nature has still won… Nothing wrong with being celibate and enjoying platonic relationships…
Self forgiveness I believe is the biggest issue I have .
I feel like we never had the chance to try and actually work on our problems. I so badly want to put my family back together, but he wants to start new. I feel unworthy of a 2nd chance. I'm heart broken and the pain feels like it's never going to end. I have emotional trauma and know it's time to work on myself.
You should research attachment theory. Specifically anxious attachment.
The thing is how do you release yourself from the past when you have children ? It’s super hard and no one really tells you how to do that . I mean I guess it’s the same thing but it’s fucking harder .
How do you emotionally attach to someone who you should feel attached to but don't?
I had a horrible relationship this year and still can seem to let it go even though we haven’t spoke in 2 months
I'm sorry. Similar situation, only it's been 6 months for me. I conclude that if he really wanted me, he wouldn't put himself in a position to lose me. I hope that you, too, can understand your worth. These people didn't deserve our love in 1st place. Peace and blessings to you 🙏🏼✨️
My wife told me this week she wants to leave because she found happiness in another man and that kills me I'm still internationally fighting for our marriage we've been together for 9 years and i just feel like im not a man for not being able to keep my family together
I just read this. I don't know you, but hope you find a way to make it through this time. I feel your pain.
@danielrosales420 it kills man i dont know how to find my way through this darkness and evil thats been thrown in my lap and i dont know if i should take her back if one day she comes around if you have advice id listen
Pain is the catalyst for growth and change…
i need advice , i been going through this relationship for 4 years and i dont what to do , this is painful phase
Its hard, my gf left when i was grieving my 14 year old dog passing over, my friend had drowned 4 months earlier...she totally blindsided me.
She never asks how i am, she is just cold & callous with no accountability on her part.
Very hard to move on but I'm trying every day.😢
Sorry to hear that. Leave yourself some space and time to rest to heal and you are strong enough to move on!
❤ thankyou
What a Cow!
This is so hard on you . Allow yourself to grieve. Time does help
She's a dismissive avoidant guaranteed
In a separation/divorce. Is it possible to let go and mentally end the relationship if we live in the same house?
Nope. Out of sight, out of mind!!!
@ hey. Tell me more about this. I am in this situation and I am not sure I am choosing the right path.
Sadly I’d do anything to forget how horrible he treated me with a mix of great n confusion
We confuse parents with partners so that trauma bond often has more to do with who we thought we loved & the idea that they once represented 💔❤️🩹♥️ completion never comes from a relationship & whatever gets projected you isn’t your stuff but his to own. You’re enough as you are & now you’re in a state of perfection on your way to authenticity
Have you tried hypnosis?
@@yogawitch3 which ones please 🥺
All nice and well but what if they live next door?
Move
Move!
The graphic @13:40 looks like they're just wriggling around in their sleep
🙏👌👌👌👌👌👌💐❤️💯💐
I was fooled by an x and an ex friend… worst thing… the new gf works with me and is picked up by the ex in my workplace… how is that easy to move on from?
Okay but how do you detach when you coparent with this person and forced to communicate and see them in person still for baby exchanges?
I still live my ex and now he's dating someone. I have no place to escape and distance my emotions. Every single day is a struggle.
Is it possible for a family member or very trusted friend do the baby visit exchange? This way you do not have to see the person ❤️
@@BrighterDays-m5d that sounds horrible, I’m so sorry…
@@LakeHouse1965 yeah but she lives an hour away and they aren’t always available to make that drive for me so I have to deal with the anxiety and go up there still. We’re still cordial with one another but I’m having such a hard time letting go. I can texting her about the baby is too much for me.
It’s the 12H stellium lol, we live in the past.
Jung said none of this
This video made me cry. Then your comment made me laugh at the end LOL
@missmarol Yes. People ascribe their own thoughts to famous people lol
🌟🗽
I never even got a chance with my soulmate my wife of 13 years cheated and I found an old coworker and realized she made a ton of unrequited love songs about me I fell very hard she wont talk to me about it but she also won’t close the book on us
No!
Comment to Infinite Wisdom oracle people. This is a great video but DEAR GOD EVERY 2 MINUTES AN INTRUSIVE AD! It's just terrible. This is one of the only you tube video stations I watch that has this many intrusive ads. It's awful. I stuck with it because the content is good but I will not subscibe to this channel because of the ad issue. Really offensive.
get an ad blocker. They are free and work. I never have any ads.
I'm so tired.
This was good content but the creepy weird ai back lay is NOT it lol😅
My ex use to sing to me and could never forget her voice!!!
Emotionally detach ka kisi ke bolne kehne se ya video dekh ke hota hai koi ... Or hme detachment mt dikhao khud se detach ho chuke hain... Ab attachment bhi sirf apne aap se hi chahte hain waps.
thank you