When you can't love your parents, just don't love them, simple. Make your decisions in life, don't feel guilty, ashamed. You are an adult you make your own decisions about what you want to have in life and what you don't want to have in life. Love yourself, be compassionate to yourself, as perhaps your parents were not, stop guilt-tripping yourself as perhaps your parents did that to you and your shame overdeveloped. If you love them or not, it doesn't matter, you are free to make whatever decisions who to love and invest your energy without feeling any shame or guilt for it.
Totally agree. At the same time, it’s nice to strive towards being loving and understanding of all beings, but fuck that ain’t gonna happen. Especially true in the cases of our close one sometimes. I can forgive people, but that doesn’t mean I have to love them. And ultimately in the end, we’re all freaking innocent, no one knows what the hell we’re doing here how we’re supposed to do it or what we’re doing, so how could we be guilty of anything necessarily?
The last part - where Rupert is talking about his own father - really hits the nail on the head. Now, if I can just make it a reality in my own mind, that's the challenge! Cheers.
Muchísimas gracias por subtitular estos vídeos en español para los que no sabemos inglés o tenemos algún tipo de dificultad con ese idioma. Yo comparto mucho de Rupert en español en una de las redes sociales más grandes que tenemos con nosotros y nos hace mucho bien entenderlo en nuestro idioma, por eso, os aliento a que sigáis traduciendo y subtitulando en español sus vídeos por lo cual estaremos inmensamente agradecidos.
Oh Dios mío 😢 😢 😢 😢 Qué hermoso todo lo que dijo. Ojalá hubiese sabido ésto antes, me hubiese ahorrado tanto odio y rencor.... y tanta incomprensión, así como sentimientos de culpabilidad. Tuvieron que pasar más de 20 años para poder perdonar a mis padres y a mi misma por no amarlos....fué difícil y muy doloroso...pero por fin me liberé de tanto sufrimiento. Ya estoy en paz conmigo misma.
Thank you for not force feeding forgiveness.... I am forgiving...forgiving........ turn the other cheek......think a better feeling thought....I'm for think a better feeling thought....... turn your boat towards the stream of well-being Kay La
And when you love your parents but they abuse you and you take the decission to get away from them forever in order to protect yourself, ¿how can you live with such a pain in your heart?, ¿what would Rupert say about this?
I am not a master like Rupert or Mooji, but I got so bad that I had to enter therapy and was taught to understand my conditioning & my abuser's conditioning but the thing that helped the most was to learn how to respect, love, honor and ACCEPT myself, just as I am right here & now, and to keep the self-esteem/worth that I found in therapy if & when past UGLY conditioning causes me pain or a loss of my self respect. I will always cherish and never lose the powerful, emotional tools I found in therapy but NEVER found in spirituality or religion. I would really like an APOLOGY from my parents for what they did to me BUT, I no long NEED an apology or anything else from them (they are both dead now!). I'M OK NOW!
@@estherg.s.5650 You have to accept the pain. You should not fight it but sit with observe it because the whole point is through observation of mind and emotion you realize you not those things you are something deeper that is within everything including your parents and that part of you was never hurt. Thats the spiritual way to look at it. For the human in you accept the pain because within that pain is sadness. ITs the love for your parents its the grief you feel at having lost a relationship that many get to have that you dont and the unfairness of it. life is not fair you have to accpet that and yes it was not fair to you accept that. Allow yourself to feel the love and hate you have for parents. Grieve but accept that you have this pain don't avoid it and with time it will heal itself. You may go on to have children and it will come up again and again sit with and allow yourself to feel it and let it flow out of you.
My experience is that love is not quantifiable. If I say, I love pizza and I love my partner spouse, what does that say? I enjoy pizza, I love my spouse. I don’t know about anybody else, but my truth is, we’re not gonna love everybody, and we don’t have too. I had some real demons in my childhood that did horrible horrible things. Forgiveness occurred, it was an experience I had, but that doesn’t mean I want to run down the street holding hands with him. And it doesn’t mean that I love him, it just means that forgiveness occurred. And I actually need a God’s help for that. It’s something that happened through me not by me. I was under the delusion at one point in time that because “they were my parents” I owe them some thing. I do not I found out. I don’t owe with them Love “because it’s family” or anything else for that matter. I’ve been caught in the trap of guilt and shaming myself for not feeling a certain kind away about people I was condition to believe I was supposed to feel a certain kind of way about. Well, fuck that. I strive to be loving and kind to all people, just simply by the action of being loving and kind, but that doesn’t mean I have to be loving and kind to people who have harmed me or abused me no matter what the theory or story behind it might be.
Oh my God! that video was amazing. I felt my own judgement of my parents falling away.
I just remembered how my father was there for me as best as he could. It changed my memory of him . Thank you for this video.
When you can't love your parents, just don't love them, simple. Make your decisions in life, don't feel guilty, ashamed. You are an adult you make your own decisions about what you want to have in life and what you don't want to have in life. Love yourself, be compassionate to yourself, as perhaps your parents were not, stop guilt-tripping yourself as perhaps your parents did that to you and your shame overdeveloped. If you love them or not, it doesn't matter, you are free to make whatever decisions who to love and invest your energy without feeling any shame or guilt for it.
Totally agree. At the same time, it’s nice to strive towards being loving and understanding of all beings, but fuck that ain’t gonna happen.
Especially true in the cases of our close one sometimes.
I can forgive people, but that doesn’t mean I have to love them.
And ultimately in the end, we’re all freaking innocent, no one knows what the hell we’re doing here how we’re supposed to do it or what we’re doing, so how could we be guilty of anything necessarily?
Excellent.😇😇😇
The last part - where Rupert is talking about his own father - really hits the nail on the head. Now, if I can just make it a reality in my own mind, that's the challenge! Cheers.
I hope it works out for you my friend:)
You are perfect where you are..allowance...make peace with where you are !
So powerful and direct, a breakthrough for me and my feelings about my parents, love you Rupert
Muchísimas gracias por subtitular estos vídeos en español para los que no sabemos inglés o tenemos algún tipo de dificultad con ese idioma. Yo comparto mucho de Rupert en español en una de las redes sociales más grandes que tenemos con nosotros y nos hace mucho bien entenderlo en nuestro idioma, por eso, os aliento a que sigáis traduciendo y subtitulando en español sus vídeos por lo cual estaremos inmensamente agradecidos.
love Ruperts stillness
Oh Dios mío 😢 😢 😢 😢
Qué hermoso todo lo que dijo.
Ojalá hubiese sabido ésto antes, me hubiese ahorrado tanto odio y rencor....
y tanta incomprensión, así como sentimientos de culpabilidad.
Tuvieron que pasar más de 20 años para poder perdonar a mis padres y a mi misma por no amarlos....fué difícil y muy doloroso...pero por fin me liberé de tanto sufrimiento.
Ya estoy en paz conmigo misma.
Just brilliant..thank you!
Gracias por los subtítulos.
we are all students , no matter where your position is in life. You might be son or father anyhow, please DO NOT JUGE EACH OTHER... THX
Excellent!
:)
Thank you for not force feeding forgiveness.... I am forgiving...forgiving........ turn the other cheek......think a better feeling thought....I'm for think a better feeling thought....... turn your boat towards the stream of well-being Kay La
omg its beautiful 😢
And when you love your parents but they abuse you and you take the decission to get away from them forever in order to protect yourself, ¿how can you live with such a pain in your heart?, ¿what would Rupert say about this?
He might say that their need to abuse was part of their conditioning, that they didn't know any better.
@@pineappleflow2876, and what about the son/daughter who must go away? What would Rupert tell him/her?
I am not a master like Rupert or Mooji, but I got so bad that I had to enter therapy and was taught to understand my conditioning & my abuser's conditioning but the thing that helped the most was to learn how to respect, love, honor and ACCEPT myself, just as I am right here & now, and to keep the self-esteem/worth that I found in therapy if & when past UGLY conditioning causes me pain or a loss of my self respect. I will always cherish and never lose the powerful, emotional tools I found in therapy but NEVER found in spirituality or religion. I would really like an APOLOGY from my parents for what they did to me BUT, I no long NEED an apology or anything else from them (they are both dead now!). I'M OK NOW!
@@estherg.s.5650 You have to accept the pain. You should not fight it but sit with observe it because the whole point is through observation of mind and emotion you realize you not those things you are something deeper that is within everything including your parents and that part of you was never hurt. Thats the spiritual way to look at it. For the human in you accept the pain because within that pain is sadness. ITs the love for your parents its the grief you feel at having lost a relationship that many get to have that you dont and the unfairness of it. life is not fair you have to accpet that and yes it was not fair to you accept that. Allow yourself to feel the love and hate you have for parents. Grieve but accept that you have this pain don't avoid it and with time it will heal itself. You may go on to have children and it will come up again and again sit with and allow yourself to feel it and let it flow out of you.
I cant stop judging myself. It feels literally impossible. I need help
I found help in psychotherapy through the AA programs and self esteem/worth.
Very nice.
It’s the same for loving ‘anybody’ isn’t it? ie not only for loving one’s parents.
The last part about his fathet... It happened to me. At the end i discovered i loved my father as i have never thought.
Thank you for the post 🙂
I don't get that we are not responsible for what we do or don't do.
It is my luck to see this video
My experience is that love is not quantifiable. If I say, I love pizza and I love my partner spouse, what does that say?
I enjoy pizza, I love my spouse.
I don’t know about anybody else, but my truth is, we’re not gonna love everybody, and we don’t have too.
I had some real demons in my childhood that did horrible horrible things. Forgiveness occurred, it was an experience I had, but that doesn’t mean I want to run down the street holding hands with him. And it doesn’t mean that I love him, it just means that forgiveness occurred. And I actually need a God’s help for that. It’s something that happened through me not by me.
I was under the delusion at one point in time that because “they were my parents” I owe them some thing. I do not I found out. I don’t owe with them Love “because it’s family” or anything else for that matter.
I’ve been caught in the trap of guilt and shaming myself for not feeling a certain kind away about people I was condition to believe I was supposed to feel a certain kind of way about. Well, fuck that.
I strive to be loving and kind to all people, just simply by the action of being loving and kind, but that doesn’t mean I have to be loving and kind to people who have harmed me or abused me no matter what the theory or story behind it might be.
thankyouthankyouthankyou
Wowww
Thank you 🌷🙏🏽
You're welcome my friend:)
♾☮❤🙏
But, my dad is also, my boss :P
He blinks like a 🐦
This hit home 033117